Prelude - the Journey to Jesus

Welcome to the I'm save now what podcast. For many of us who embark on the journey to salvation it's not easy. We didn't meet Jesus through this miraculous encounter, nor did we jump at the opportunity as children. For some of us it was not until we went through the messiness of life and hit rock bottom that we met the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, the one and only Jesus. 

Transcript

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Happy Monday, everybody. Good morning. Welcome to the I'm saved now what podcast, and I'm your host, Jayvon Taylor. The prelude is called The Journey to Jesus, and it's important that we highlight the journey to Jesus because many of us speak about being saved, but a lot of us don't understand the journey to Jesus. My journey to Jesus may not look like your journey to Jesus, but what I can say is that my journey to Jesus was so important and so necessary in getting me to where I am today. It was necessary in getting me to make the decision to be saved. And so, because of that, the Lord says, Javon, in your prelude, we need to speak about the journey to Jesus. How did you get to being saved? So, out of obedience, and because I love the Lord and I'm learning to obey every day. Here we go. So it all started at age 29. I was sitting in the apartment I shared with my boyfriend at the time. I knew something was missing. I was empty on the surface. I might have looked fine, but trust me, very deep down inside of me was so much grief, pain, and darkness. I felt lost. I felt abandoned, unworthy. Something in me was not right. And I decided to go on a journey to find myself, or at least that's what I thought I was doing. Little did I know that this wasn't a journey to finding J Von, but a journey to finding Jesus. A journey that I never saw coming, but one that completely transformed my life in radical ways. And I am so happy that this happened. Because without this journey, I would not be the woman I am today. And this journey started at my rock bottom. I knew of Jesus growing up, he was my grandmother's Lord. You know, I would go to church on a Sunday with grandma, she would read her Bible, she would pray, but I never thought he was my Jesus. My mommy would read me Bible stories about Jesus. I would go to church on Sundays, but I never thought Jesus was for me, right? When I went to church, the people in church didn't look like me. They dressed differently, they spoke differently, they spoke different languages, they were loud. And to be honest, a lot of it creeped me out. So I grew up going to predominantly Pentecostal slash apostolic church. And I didn't really like it, right? It was loud, it was it was scary. I didn't understand anything of what was happening. And so from a very early stage, I really said this church thing wasn't for me, right? But interestingly though, as much as I said this church thing wasn't for me, I always knew that there was power in prayer. I always knew that there was a God. I always knew that there were certain protocols and certain things in my life that I must do. You know, I knew that I should pray over my food. I knew that before I did an exam, I must pray. I knew that going to church on Sundays was important, although I didn't like it. And there were certain things in my life that were important. I knew that having a Bible was necessary and essential, but I didn't understand the meaning of it. But it wasn't until 2022 when something began to shift in my life. I got this strange desire to get up and read in the Bible, starting from Genesis. And so I got up early every morning and started reading from the KJV. Trust me, at this point, I don't even know what I was doing because where I lived at the time, I think there was a physical Bible present. I'm not sure. I think yes, I think there was one, but it wasn't mine. And it was easier for me to use my phone. So I had a Bible app at the time, and the version I had on the Bible app was a King James. And so every morning I got up early and I would just be reading the King James version on my Bible app, right? I got this nudge to start going to church. No, this was weird for me because I hadn't made church a regular practice in my adult life. My grandma died when I was 18, so that was in 2012. And I told you that I used to go to church predominantly with my grandmother. So when she died, I never had to go to church anymore. So I think I made a deal with myself at the point like I would go to church once a month, and then once a month turned into none at all. And yeah, I stopped going. But in 2022, out of the blue, I get this prompting, I get this nudge to start going to church. Now, this was very strange for me, right? I wasn't planning to go to church, that wasn't my lifestyle, but I obliged and I went. I went turned. I felt it felt good, and over time I started going back until it became a desire. And it was it was it was interesting because when I started going to church first, I used to just sit down. Praise and worship was not my vibe. I would hear the songs, I would clap, whatever, but I wouldn't get up, I wouldn't sing, I would just more observe. But one thing I've learned on my journey to Jesus is that the Lord knows you and the Lord knows what will get your attention and he knows how to communicate with you. If you're someone who communicates in song, he will use song. If you're someone who communicates with books, he will do books. If he's if you're someone who communicates on social media, he will use social media, he will use whatever method it is to get your attention because God loves you, and because God loves you, he's gonna communicate to you in your language. So because God loves me and God knows me, here's what God did for me. God used a woman, a woman by the name of Sarah Jakes Roberts, and the Lord put Sarah Jakes Roberts on my TikTok page. Now, TikTok wasn't a page that I used a lot, a platform I used a lot, but the Lord knew that I liked people who were pretty, I liked women who were powerful, and I liked women who dressed well and put themselves together. And one boy, God used the powerhouse of Sarah Jake Roberts to get my attention, right? I discovered her and I thought she was so fly. And I'm like, oh my gosh, how is this a pastor? Like, she is pretty, she looks good, you know, she dresses well, but her message is solid, like her sermon is solid. I'm like, God, is this too good to be true? And then guess what? I ended up going down a rabbit hole, right? So when I started researching her, I discovered that she was the daughter of Bishop T D Jakes, and she was an author. So I bought her book, Lost Unfound, and then I read it. And as I read through the pages of her book, I began to discover a God I knew nothing about. Now remember, I am here reading Genesis. I'm reading through Genesis. I think by this time now I would have gotten to Exodus, and I am learning the word, but I'm reading the KJV, I'm learning the word. But here it is the Lord is opening my eyes to who he is using another person. He's using Sarah Jakes's Sarah Jakes Roberts, and he's using her story to open my mind and my eyes and to reveal to me who he is. Because I had not yet gotten to that part in the Bible that I could understand in my own words, in my own language, that God was a redeemer, that God was a restorer, that God, you know, God restored, you know, what was broken, God, God rescues. Like I didn't know that. Like I was reading it, but I didn't understand it. And it took this young lady's book, Lost and Found, to show me a side of God that I did not know existed. I knew about God the judge. I knew about God, you know, when he got upset. I knew about that version of God because that's what I remember from being a child going to church, you know, that you mustn't do this and you mustn't do that. And I remember the Ten Commandments, and I remember things like honor your father and mother, and you will live long in the land. I remember those things, but I didn't know that God was a God of comfort, like God was a God of forgiveness and redemption. Like again, I heard it, but it didn't mean anything to me. And it was not until I read Sarah Jakes's book, it wasn't until I started to follow her on Instagram that the Lord began to reveal to me a different side of him, right? And this began to ignite an entire movement in my mind, in my soul, in my spirit, right? A fire started to burn and I got hungry. I started to stand and sing in praise and worship at church like never before. I bought my own physical Bible, and if you know me, I like pink, so of course, my Bible is pink, right? I changed my therapist to a pastor and I started going to life groups at church. Slowly but surely, my life was changing. My appetite was adjusting and my spirit man was coming alive. The Lord knocked on the door of my heart and I answered. I said yes and I surrendered and I let go. You see, the thing about it is even during this process of things changing and things shifting in me, I was saying to God, but God, I'm not worthy, I'm not unclean, I'm not clean, I'm unqualified. God, there I have so many skeletons in my closet. At the time I was living with my partner, I was unmarried, and I was living with a man, you know. So in my mind, I'm going to church and I'm living with somebody I'm not married to. I'm like, God, I'm a hypocrite. You know, like how can I how can you be telling me to say, get saved and change my life, and you be calling me, but God, this is my reality, and I will never forget the words. I will never, ever, ever forget the words. If it's some words, if these are the only words that God, I am absolutely sure God has ever spoken to me, and He has spoken to me a million times. It was seek me first. Those were the words I heard clearly in my spirit. He said, Seek me first. He said it, seek me first, and he kept saying it, seek me first. So let me tell you, I I obeyed, I yielded to those instructions, and I just started to seek God. I got up in the morning and I was praying. I was doing devotions in the morning. I used to struggle. I used to couldn't, I could pray for probably only five minutes, or probably, let's be honest, probably like a minute at the time, right? And I was just getting up in the morning, I was praying. You know, I was praying, I was doing that, I was going to church, I was getting involved in life groups, I was trying to become a part of this community, but what I didn't realize it was God. God was just opening up who I truly was. He was just releasing his spirit, he was unleashing his spirit in me, and I was just, I was so hungry for the change. So whilst this is happening, I'm telling you, I don't know what's happening, and my life is just shifting, right? And I get this desire. So Sarah Jake's Roberts has this conference called Woman Evolve. Now, I'm like, what is this? What is this conference? What is Woman Evolve? So I realized it was our conference in Dallas, Texas. At the time, it's a woman's conference, and I said, you know what? I'm gonna go. So this is September of 2023. So I buy the ticket to this conference. Buy the ticket. Now, I had asked a friend of mine if she could come with me or whatever. She said, Yeah, man, we can go together, blah, blah, blah. And I was excited because you know, never been to Dallas before on my own. I've never gone to a conference like this in my life. I didn't know what to expect, and so I was just like, Well, you know, I would love to have company to go to this conference, anyways. My friend says to me, Well, you know, unfortunately, I won't be able to come because um I don't remember what was the reason. Oh, I think she said she couldn't find someone to stay with her daughter or something, and I was really disappointed. But by that time, I'd already bought the ticket for the conference, I'd already bought the plane ticket, and I had booked the hotel room. Now I was really disappointed as well because I really didn't have any money at the time, and I was looking forward to my friend coming, so we would have split the fee for the hotel room. But notwithstanding the disappointment I felt, I had already booked it and I said, Well, God, you and me are gonna go in now because I I I need to go and see what this is about. So I I I go, I board the plane, I go to Dallas, Texas. I go and I stay at the hotel. And God is such a faithful God that even though I went to Dallas by myself, the Lord ordained it and orchestrated it that I would have met someone on the Woman Evolve app that you know we'd become very good friends. If you met us on that con at that conference, you would have thought that we knew each other for a long time. She's actually one of my closest friends now. Um, shout out to my friend Monique. Thank you so much for just being present and allowing God to use you in that season. But you know, that day I was there and I didn't know anything, and this was me just moving forward in faith. I didn't understand anything. And I remember the morning getting ready for the conference. I was in the shower, and I'm there praying, and I'm saying, God, um, I don't know what to expect here. I don't know what you're gonna do here, but help this conference to do something for me in my life, help it to shift something, help it to, you know, shift whatever. And I kept saying that, and I couldn't find a word, and the word catalyst just dropped into my space. And I said, Yes, God, help this conference to be a catalyst for change in my life. I remember saying that, and I kid you not, I go to this conference, and at the time it was in Dallas, it was at Globe Life Field, and I walk into this stadium, this arena, and it has 40,000 women. 40,000 women. Now remember, I told you I don't know what to expect. I am just new here, and I walk into this arena and I begin to just listen to the music, and you know, I I think Shandom Moore was there that year, Abby Gamboa, um, you know, and it was the music was just so amazing. But let me tell you how I knew that my God was what was rooting for me. I am in this theater, I'm in this this this this stadium with 40,000 women, and Pastor Sarah Jakes comes onto the stage and she had on this blue, I'll never forget it. It was this blue blazer with feathers. It was really cool. And she comes and she was saying that the Lord dropped a word in her spirit, you know. She had prepared a sermon, but the Lord dropped a word in her spirits and whatever, and she started to speak about catalyst. Now, let me tell you something. Now remember, I am one person, one single person, one single person, and I don't even know what I'm doing, I don't understand half of what is going on. And you're telling me that the same word that the Lord dropped in my spirit in the shower before I come to this conference is the very same word that Pastor Sarah Jake is gonna preach on. And I'm like, my God, listen, if if if that roof could have come off with the way how I screamed in that place, it would have come off because I'm telling you, in that moment, I knew God saw me, God saw me there, and you know, leaving Woman Evolve in 2023, um, it was just a very life-changing experience for me because I got to experience God in a whole new way, and that was 2023, September, the October of 2023. I turned 30, and then I said to myself, I knew I was going. I said, God, I'm giving my life to you. I am giving my life to you, Lord. I'm surrendering my life to you. I am I am coming on this journey. I don't know what it looks like, I don't understand what is gonna happen, but I'm surrendering to you, I'm submitting to you. On November 5, 2023, at the age of 30, I got baptized. I said yes to Jesus, and you know, I was excited and happy, and I was ready to start my new life in in Christ. I was excited, and let me tell you something: the journey to Jesus was nothing short of questions. I had so many questions, there was so many uns, there was so much uncertainty, there was so much, I don't know what I am doing. There was so much, am I really hearing God's voice? There was so much, am I ready to embark on this? What if I fail? What if I mess up? You're too unclean, you're unworthy, you're not ready. But let me tell you something about the the Lord I serve. God is so faithful, God is so faithful. The Lord will stretch his hand out and help you along that way. The journey to Jesus for me was started in my rock bottom, starting in that place where I saw myself and I said, But no, Jayvon, this cannot be your life. I was like, this cannot be my life. As like, God, this cannot be my life. I was in the room of an apartment and I looked up and I said, This cannot be my life. From the outside, it might have looked good, but I'm telling you, I was living in stagnation. I felt heaviness every day. I was living a life I didn't even want for myself. I didn't desire that. I never desired to live with a man before I was married to one. I I never desired to not have a relationship with my mother. At that time, the relationship I had with my mother was fractured. My mother raised me on her own. I I was raised by a single parent. My father has never played a role in my life. I have been I was abandoned by him from I was even from before I was even born, right? So he knows me and I know him, but I have no relationship. I was in a when I tell you, I was just in a state of terror. Let's just use that word. I was in a state of terror. I I was I was so far gone. I thought I was a mess. I just I could not understand it. I could not make sense of the life that I was living. It made no sense. It was not a life I desired. I was making so many bad decisions, so many wrong choices, and what was getting to me was the fact that I knew better, but I couldn't do better. And I was like, this makes no sense. I said, why do I want to do good, but I'm doing bad? Why is it that I am here in this situation? Why am I sitting here like this? Why am I in this relationship that I am suffocating? Like these were the questions that I was asking myself daily. And the truth was, many people who interacted me with me on a daily basis did not know. I was saying, God, why won't my mother talk to me? Why, you know, why was I alone? Why was I isolated? I was like, who is why won't somebody rescue me? Who is coming to help me? I'm like, God, I cannot do this. And in that moment, in my lowest of the lowest of the lowest of the lowest, you know, that's what I call it. It was that season of stagnation. It was the lowest of the lowest of the lowest of the lowest moment in my life. In that season, in that mess, in that murkiness, in that in that period where I thought I was nothing and nobody. The Lord found me. And the Lord stretched his hand out, and the Lord called me and he said, Come. He said, Come, Jayvon, come, come. And let me tell you something. I have absolutely no regrets. I have no regrets. Do I still have questions? Of course. Do I still have doubts? Of course. Do I know everything now? Absolutely not. Because I will never know everything. But one thing I know is that saying yes to Jesus was the best decision I ever made in my life. And if you know me, and if you've met me, you can I can tell you that within 365 days of me going to Woman Evolve in 2023, the Lord shifted my life. The Lord shifted my life without me lifting a finger. The Lord shifted my life and rewrote my story. The Lord sent me to a different country. The Lord sent me gave me a new job in a new destination. He gave me everything brand new. He gave me a brand new car, a brand new job. The apartment that I live in was brand new. And the name to put icing on the cake, the Lord sent me to a church that was called New Life. Because you see, God is not a God is not a God of randoms, God is a God of strategy, God is a God of clarity. And God said, This is your new life. Because that's what it is. When you say yes to Jesus, He's gonna begin to give you a new life. So, guys, join me for this journey. Join me every week for the next 10 weeks as we jump into this podcast. The podcast is called I'm Saved Now What. Because the truth is, after we get saved, that's when the journey really begins. There's so many things that happened to me since I got saved, since I said yes to Jesus that I didn't even know was coming. And the reason for this podcast is to help us, new believers in the faith, navigate the unknown, navigate this terrain that the Lord has called us into. Not all of us have spiritual parents, not all of us have parents who are saved, not all of us have direct access to people who can you know mentor us and nurture us along the way. And this podcast is to assist us in this journey. We're gonna learn about what salvation really is. We're gonna learn about what being a new creation in Christ means. We're gonna learn about so many different things, and the Lord has given me topics upon topics upon topics for us to discuss. So, guys, join me for the journey. Welcome to I'm Saved Now What season one.