The Voice

Episode 24: The Voice

Every man hears a voice that shapes the way he thinks, responds, and lives. It may sound like your own thoughts, but where did it come from? In this episode of Second Wind, KR Henderson challenges men to examine the voice they've been following and discover how changing the conversation in their minds can change the direction of their lives because every thought is leading you somewhere.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:06

As always, let me remind you this is Second Win with K.R. Henderson. You're not late, you're assigned. Before we begin today, I want to ask you to do something. Don't say it out loud. Just say it to yourself. What's one thing you want more than anything else in your life? Don't tell me. Don't even tell your wife. Don't even tell your pastor or your friend. Just say it to yourself. Now what's the one thing you've been trying to overcome? Fear, anger, addiction, loneliness, regret, guilt, bitterness, shame, whatever it is, don't say it out loud. Just say it to yourself. Did you hear it? Nobody else did. But you did. Which means there's a voice inside of you that's been talking all along. Second Wind didn't begin with a microphone. It began with a conversation. A conversation I was having with myself. This is why I started this podcast. This is why I started this ministry. Because I discovered something. Every man eventually learns the most influential voice in your life isn't always the loudest one. It's the one you hear when nobody else is around. That voice, the one nobody else hears, it's influential. And it has more influence over your life than you probably realize. It can convince you to say things you'll regret, do things you'll spend years trying to undo, or just believe things that were never true to begin with. That same voice has taught men. It has talked men into doing things, stealing from people, robbing banks, stealing from businesses, lying from congregations. I mean, hurting people that they claim to love and throwing away their future for a moment of pleasure. I watched that voice lead men to prison. I watched it lead men to drugs. I watched it destroy marriages, ruin relationships, and in some cases end lives. I've also watched that same voice lead men to earn degrees, get a formal education, undergrad, master's, PhD, build businesses, gain knowledge and wisdom, and develop a deeper walk with God. Same voice, different direction. The voice isn't the problem. The problem is which one you keep believing. I mean, I gotta tell you, I grew up with guys who started on the same streets that I did. Some ended up in prison, some were killed, some built families, some became prosperous. The difference wasn't where we started. Make no mistake, that wasn't where, it wasn't where we started. But the same voice speaks to all of us. It's the voice that we keep listening to who has the greatest influence. It determines how we treat our wives, how you raise your children, how you respond when you're angry, how you handle disappointment, and even how you see yourself. I've seen families, right, take one another to court. Not because they couldn't hear each other, understand me, but because of the conversations they'd had and been having with themselves. Long before they ever had a conversation with each other. This is why the voices we allow into our lives matter, because today's input becomes tomorrow's internal conversation, and tomorrow's internal conversation becomes tomorrow's decisions, and then we know those decisions become habits, and habits seem to seep, they seem to leak into our character over time, and eventually your character becomes the very life that you live, good or bad. Another way of saying it is what you repeatedly listen to eventually influences what you believe, how you think, and how you live. So I've got a few questions for you today, my good man. Excuse me. And I don't want you to answer them out loud. I want you to answer them honestly. The first question, what have you been saying to yourself lately? One man tells himself I can't, another man tells himself I can. One says I'll never, another says never say never. So what have you been saying to yourself? You can put a comment in the chat. Uh please do feel free. Don't let me stop you. And the second question: where did that voice come from? Did it come from your parents? It's quite possible. Parents don't always realize they help shape a child's thinking, their attitude, confidence, and demeanor. Did it come from a coach? I mean, those of you who know me, you know I played ball all through school. And hey, my coaches, they influenced me, they changed my work ethic for the better. They actually made me work harder. But what about a teacher? I can remember one professor at Southern University, never forget it. She started the semester with about 30 kids. I think 20 students dropped out of the class. But I stayed, worked and earned a B and learned something bigger than a subject. Sometimes the the greatest lesson comes from people who refuse to lower the standard. Did it come from a failed relationship? Maybe, maybe, maybe. I've been divorced. A painful experience. Did it come from that? How about that? I've I've buried both of my parents. Or have you repeated something so many times? I mean, that you've now mistaken it for your own voice. How about that? I mean, and then the third question, this voice that you hear, that we hear, is it telling you the truth? Or has it been feeding you fear? Shame, comparison, regret, possibly even condemnation. And here's what I know: the enemy is a liar. God convicts, right? The enemy condemns. Those are not the same things. And then number four, whose voice is it? Really? Is it yours? Someone else's? Or is it God's voice? And here's one more. If I were to listen to your internal conversation for the last 30 days, would I recognize God's voice in it? I mean, I want you to think about that. Sit with that for a moment. If I listen to your internal conversation for the last 30 days, would I recognize God's voice in it? Because, brothers, there's no way we can renovate circumstances before our mind gets renovated. I promise you, it won't happen. This is why one writer wrote, be transformed by the renewing of your mind, because when your mind changes, the man begins to change. Every voice is making a disciple. I guarantee you. If you listen to something long enough, you'll eventually think like it. And if you think like it long enough, you'll end up living like it. Right? And I believe if you live like it long enough, you'll become like it. You see what I'm saying? So I want to be transparent with you just for a second. One thing life has taught me, I mean I've learned a lot, as you can tell from this gray hair. But one thing life has taught me, expectations, often lead to disappointment. There will be people you genuinely believe may help open doors for you. I'm dropping a footnote here. Help you reach your goals. And sometimes it just never happens. This happens to each and every one of us when you start having these conversations. I mean, at first, I was frustrated. But after I sat with it, God showed me something, my disappointment wasn't just about them. It exposed something in me. Somewhere along the way, I had developed the expectation that certain people would help carry an assignment that God gave me. Then I heard a question in my spirit, Ken, who taught you to think like that? Who taught you that your peace should depend on another particip on another's participation? Who taught you that your assignment required someone else's endorsement? Because when your expectations of people become too high, your disappointment becomes inevitable. This is why we read and we study the way we move. So when these voices come along, and they will, guess what? You don't have to entertain them because you know the alignment. Because it's written for you. And brother, some of you are frustrated with a lot of different things. I mean, wife, not because she's a bad wife, but because you've expected her to meet needs that only God can meet. Some of you are frustrated with the children, the babies, because you've expected gratitude. And they hadn't learned to give gratitude yet, right? Some are maybe frustrated with church congregation because you've expected people to never disappoint you. Let me help you today. Love people, appreciate people, serve people, but be careful about building your peace on people's participation. When you do that, you start having those inner conversations. So, how do we begin renewing our minds? Let's go ahead and get to it. It starts by paying attention to who's been talking to us. The older I get, the more selective I become about who gets a microphone in my life. Some people don't need a microphone, they need a mute button. You know what I'm saying? Because every voice is trying to shape the way you think, the way I think. And the way I think eventually shapes the way I live. I said that earlier. I mean, some of us are still living off something a parent said 30 years ago. I mean, come on, man. Some of us are still trying to prove a teacher was wrong. Okay? I mean, half the people you're trying to impress couldn't pick you out of a they couldn't pick you out of a lineup. They forgot about you a long time ago. And you're still holding auditions. And we've allowed those voices to become louder and brighter. I mean, louder than God's. And gentlemen, everybody doesn't deserve that kind of influence. The scripture says, He that walketh with the wise shall be wise. How about that? Wisdom is not contagious because you're standing next to the wise man. It's contagious because you're listening to him. Does that make sense? The second thing, start questioning the conversations that you've been having with yourself. Every thought that enters your mind doesn't deserve your agreement. It won't get my agreement. I tell people all the time, every thought that enters your mind or your head shouldn't come out of your mouth. It deserves examination, not agreement. Just because you thought it doesn't make it true. Some of us believe everything we tell ourselves, right? Somebody else talked to us the way we talk to ourselves, we stop answering the phone calls. Believe me, some of us have rehearsed the same lie for so many years. I'm just gonna put it out there. I mean, hey, I'll call it reality. I'm too old. I'll never get ahead. I'll always struggle. Who told you that? Because I can promise you God didn't. Then you've got to start replacing those conversations. Right? You don't overcome a lie by arguing with it, you overcome it by replacing it with truth. You can't tell yourself the same thing every day and expect your life to move in a different direction. It doesn't work that way. If you've been feeding your mind fear, start feeding it truth. You've been feeding it comparison, start feeding it purpose. Because whatever you feed grows, whatever you starve weakens. And finally, spend enough time with God's voice that you recognize. Before you recognize everybody else's. Not because his voice is louder than every other voice, but because they've spent enough time with him that they recognize him immediately. Just like a child recognizes his father's voice in a crowded room. Remember what I asked you at the beginning? I told you, don't say it out loud. Just say it. Say it to yourself, which means that voice is still talking. It never stopped talking. You just finally stopped long enough to hear. The question isn't if you'll hear a voice tomorrow, you will. I guarantee you that. Because the life you'll be living tomorrow begins with the conversation you will have with yourself today. But gentlemen, my good man, tomorrow morning, that voice is coming back. I'll tell you what you can do. And I'll also tell you what you can't do. This voice will tell you that who you are and who you'll never become. When it does, don't believe it. Just because you heard it, examine it. Don't believe it. Test it. Ask yourself, is this God's voice or just another voice? Because every voice is leading you somewhere. Fear, faith, one leads to shame, another one leads to grace. One reminds you of who you are, right? And whose you are. Choose carefully, my good man, because the voice you believe will become the life you live. And before you leave, if today's episode challenged you or encouraged you or made you think, don't please don't stop here. I want you to visit my website, krnewvision.net, and explore my growing library, premium audio classes, where we take the conversation to another level. See the podcast introduces the principles, but the audio classes help you apply them. Because information, the information doesn't change a lot. We can be well informed, but oh my goodness, application. Application changes everything when you start applying it. And if you're serious about becoming the man God created you to be, invest in yourself. Visit KRNewvision.net and as always, this is Second Win with KR Henderson. You're not late, you're assigned.