Day 23: When Gratitude Brings You Back to the People You Love

Some memories arrive when you least expect them.

Today I continue sharing another one of Rebecca Conklin Klieboemer's beautiful "love letters" from February 2017. This one was written to her sister, Melissa, and as I read it aloud, I realized something that had somehow escaped me all these years—we both have sisters named Melissa.

That simple realization opened the door to memories of my own sister, who passed away after years of struggling with mental illness. I found myself remembering who she was before life became so difficult, wondering what she might have been like today, and feeling grateful for the time we did have together.

I also share a simple moment from my weekend that reminded me how much life has changed. Floating peacefully in the pool, talking with God, and reflecting on His faithfulness, I realized just how far I've come from a season of constant stress and worry. Sometimes healing isn't loud. Sometimes it looks like quiet gratitude, peaceful moments, and trusting God with the things we can't control.

Thank you for spending a few unedited minutes with me today.

If this episode encourages you, please consider following the podcast, sharing it with a friend, or leaving a review. Your support means more than you know.

♥️ This episode is proudly sponsored by Rebecca Conklin Klieboemer, whose generosity helps keep 10 Unedited Minutes with Marlena on the air.

Transcript

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Good morning everyone. Welcome to another edition of 10 Unedited Minutes with Marlena. It is Monday, July 20th, and I know I said good morning, but we are into the afternoon by 45 minutes, and yeah, today kind of got away from me. So here we go. Let's get started. Um, so this episode, or this podcast actually, is sponsored by my dear friend Rebecca Conklin Kleibomer. She has graciously agreed to sponsor two months worth of my podcast episodes. And um by doing so, I thought it would be really cool to honor her with spending just a few minutes at the beginning of each episode reminiscing, maybe sharing a fun memory of her, or just loving on her a little bit. And I actually saved the the last uh 28 days worth of episodes for this. And back in 2017, Rebecca decided to spend the whole month of February um writing a love letter to each one of her dear friends. And she Rebecca has taught me to be grateful. She has taught me a lot about gratitude, how to um express gratitude, and how to just be grateful for the little things in life. So it is no wonder that she is able to write these beautiful letters to all of her friends. And I decided um I was going to share each one of these letters. And yeah, 2017, that was what nine years ago. I saved each one of these letters with the intent of putting it into a book for her someday. And we all know how projects go around here. So um they're still here, but I still have them. And when she agreed to sponsor my podcast, and I thought I should do something really cool for her, these were the first things that came to mind. So here we go. Today is uh day five. So she wrote this on February 5th of 2017, and this is to her sister, and it says, Dear Melissa, in 42 years of me having three sisters, you and I have spent the least amount of time together. We've lived in different parts of the country from each other the most. While Jessica and Kendra mostly have lived near, even with either of us or each other, we all have had sisterless locales at one time or another. But for the most part, we live near at least one other sister. It's hard to conceive otherwise, but you and I have not racked up that many years in the same zip code at the same time. What I love about you is that this circumstance has never in any way diminished or deteriorated the love you and I share as sisters or the love that we share among the whole gaggle of us. There is nothing that you wouldn't do for me. There is nothing that I wouldn't do for you. Well, you don't really like visiting me in Ohio in the winter, and I can't tell you how much I'm dreading coming to Texas this year when it's hot as balls already in May. Oh my goodness, you have the reputation of being the sweetest sister among the four of us, the sweetest sibling altogether counting our baby brother. It's probably true. You also have a streak that is too hilarious and goofy to be considered as wicked as it might otherwise be. Kendi sent me a picture of you making a funny face yesterday, and it made me pee a little because I was laughing so hard. It was a perfectly captured moment of your most lovable, ridiculous, crazy, fun to be around self. I hate it that I'm not there with you to see it in person and hear that soul of Melissa cackling laugh that sends me to the moon, even if it has just followed the sound of a rubber ball you've kicked astray, smacking my kid in the face. I hope that that wasn't an inside joke, but anyway, back to it. Back to how sweet you are. If I think I have a heart for all people, I've got nothing on you. Your compassion for others and your unfailing ability to see good in all people is a true lamp of love in this dark world. Let the little children come to Auntie M. She will love you and care for you and always be there for you. We sisters have depended on you and put in your care the most precious of our life's blood. You are more than just an aunt to them. You are indeed Christ to them and embody his love for them and for us. I've always been enamored with your golden Rapunzel hair because it is a literal ray of the shining light that is within you. It framed your face when you smiled with all your young might and tried to assure me that I was not about to die atop that double Ferris wheel at the fair. The dark night and the cold wind and the glaring lights and the jarring cacophony of people and music and machinery and the pounding of my heart, I was terrified. But there you were. There you were, a golden little light promising me that I would be okay. I've been a braver person ever since. And now that I've composed this love letter to you, I'm going to get off of my computer and take a shower with the best soap that has ever graced my skin. Soap that you have handmade with cheer and passion and creativity, a solid little hunk of smooth love that makes me feel amazing. I'm going to wash you right into my skin and prepare myself to spread a little more light and love today. I love you, Missy. Always Rebecca. Rebecca, Rebecca, Rebecca. So as I was reading this letter today, I had a realization and it hit me with that last line when she said, I love you, Missy. And I never put this together, but Rebecca, we both have sisters named Melissa. And I don't know why I never put that together, but this letter really made me think of my sister. And um, if you don't know, my sister actually passed away about 13 years ago. Uh, she was in her mid-30s when she did so, and yeah, it was a very hard time. And I've shared on here in the past how much Rebecca was there for me when we went through that. But this letter um caused me to reminisce about her kind of in her younger years when we were growing up, and before the age of, I'm gonna say 19 or 20, when she was just um hit hard with mental illness. Um my sister and I had a pretty decently close relationship. Um, yeah, we shared a bed as as young siblings. We played Barbie dolls together and, you know, made our teddy bears talk to each other and got into trouble with each other, fought with each other. But it it it also made me wonder what my sister would have been like if she wasn't plagued with that mental illness and um depression um for the last 10, 15 years, 15 years of her life. Um, and if she was still here, what she would be like. And I know without a doubt that she would have been the best aunt to her nieces and nephews. Um, she did um have the joy of being an aunt to both of my children. They were pretty young when she passed away, um, but they were still here and she got to enjoy them. I have photos of her holding my daughters and loving on my daughters, and every year I put an ornament on the tree that I know was from her to uh my daughters, and she just bought it because she loved them. And I I do, I just wonder what what life would be like if she was still here and not plagued with that mental illness, and I'm sure we would be close. Um yeah. So that went off on a little bit of a tangent, but Rebecca, I did not realize I'd never put it together that we both have uh sisters named Melissa, and my sister does not like to be called Missy. That's why it kind of hit me at the end, like, oh wait, whoa! So another commonality that we have growing up, Rebecca, it's just crazy. Um that we've kind of lived parallel lives, and this is crazy to me. But anyway, what was my weekend like? Let me tell you what my weekend was like. Yesterday my daughter called me up and said, Mom, let's go swimming. And I said, I'm game, let's go. So we packed up and went to the Bluffton pool and took our floaties and there wasn't a lot of people there because I mean, it was beautiful out yesterday, but it was a little chilly once you got out of that pool. But I'm gonna say this again. My favorite thing in the world is just to lay in that water and float. And I have this float that goes under my neck and under my ankles, and I just and it's so much nicer when there's nobody else in the pool. So literally for like a good hour, I I have sunburn on like my shoulders because my arms were out straight like this. But while I was laying there, like it also caused me just to spend some time with God and um talk to him, let him talk to me. It allowed me to clear my head and just think of all the things that I am grateful for and all the stuff that you know, the amazing gifts that he has provided for me and my family. And it was just a really good day, a really good day. And again, I compare it to that Florida trip a year ago where I was floating in a pool, and I my mind was so stressed that I just could not even go to these um places in my mind, like where I went yesterday. And uh it feels so good to not be so stressed all the time and to just be happy, right? Just be happy and be grateful. And it's it's also very freeing to take um my husband is mowing grass and he's right outside my window. So if you hear that lawnmower, maybe you do, maybe you don't. But anyway, it's very freeing to be able to just hand something over to God and let him take care of it. And I worked a long time to do that, and I feel like I've accomplished that with a lot of things, and it feels good, and I know without a doubt that he provides and he's gonna take care of whatever it is. You may still have to go through something hard, but he is uh, but he is he's there for you. Um so let's end it there. That's enough for today. We're at 10 minutes. Um I'm sure some of you people close to me are probably gonna be crying at this episode because I uh reminisced a little bit about my sister, my beautiful sister, and my beautiful friend, and her beautiful sister. Thank you, Rebecca. I'm sure at one time I've met uh your sister Melissa. Actually, I know I did, but I get your sisters mixed up. Maybe the time I met your sister Melissa was when I thought it was Kendra. I swear to God, there it and I think it was at your grandma's funeral. And I think you're up until about a minute before I left, I think you I thought your sister Melissa was Kendra. But anyway, that's a confession from me. But thank you, Rebecca, for being this beautiful friend, for allowing me to share these letters and for sponsoring this podcast. And if anybody else wants to sponsor, um, we're getting close to the end of Rebecca's sponsorship and I do need another one. So let me know. It's a just a minimum a small investment of $25 a month, and that basically covers my Buzz Sprout subscription and just to keep this uh podcast going. Um, and this podcast has done a lot for me. So I've talked about that in the past. And if you want to know, go listen to some old ones. But all right, guys, I love you. Pray for me. I pray for you every day, and we'll see you tomorrow. Bye.