Living or Existing? How to Wipe the Slate Clean

A really honest dive into whether you are just moving through the motions of life, or creating a life that is exciting and fulfilling! Some gentle reminders about how we can get so caught up in the race of life, we forget about how much power we have each moment in each day, to intentionally put our energy, time and focus towards things that light us up! Stop and look up!

Topics:

• Living vs Auto Pilot- sometimes we get so locked in on commitments, expectations that we forget to stop, lift our head up and literally allow ourselves creativity and newness in our lives. Bringing awareness to what feels good, what feels heavy, what we are craving in life, and what is ready to fall away.
• Check Points & Anchors- The variety of ways you can create opportunity to 'meet yourself', check in, and adjust with your intentions. Annual snap shots, seasonal, monthly, with the moon, weekly, daily...lets chat about them all and how they may support you.
• Full Body Yes and No- How we can start to pay attention and bring awareness to how the body is trying to communicate, and how these can be reflection and growth points in meeting yourself and shifting in life.
• Area of Wellness- Diving into all the aspects that make up our life, but also the aspects of Holistic Health and Wellness. A brief check in on what's feeling good, and what aspects you might want to start sprinkling some attention and energy into.
• Tips & Tricks- Some suggestions on ways that you can keep awareness, adjust your energy, and go from a stuck feeling to bit more clarity and alignment.

Stay tuned for upcoming episodes that will take us deeper into some of these topics that Miranda Lee is so passionate about!

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Transcript

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SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to the Brand Lee Podcast. A life fully lived embraces every season. The highs and the lows. Allowing ourselves to love fiercely, feel our feelings, and trust to land. This is a heartless space created for just that. Deep vulnerable conversations, connections, learning to unlearn, become part of a beautiful community while growing and healing right alongside people. Because everything is easier with support and lived experiences shared with the right kind of people. Let's step off autopilot, get a little uncomfortable, take a breath, and dive right in. Welcome back to the Miranda Lee Podcast. Today is going to get you excited. It will hopefully invite you to just stop and pause and reflect. And again, I say this a lot, but really call back your power in your freaking life. Today we are going to talk about living versus existing, or what I like to call wiping the slate clean. This is the most impactful mindset shift and practice that has changed my life as a human, as a mom, as a wife, as an entrepreneur, and ultimately shifted me to then get more into coaching and supporting people in owning their lives and what their lives look like. It just adds a really beautiful change to how you meet your life and how you move through it. There was definitely a lens shift for me, as I've spoken to if you've listened to my story. Walking a line with a very dark unknown and ultimately with death lets you really understand that right now matters. This moment matters, not my dreams in 20 years or 40 years. I'm not waiting for retirement. Right now is what I get. This is my guarantee, this moment right here. And so yeah, I like to call it wiping the slate clean and literally envisioning like wiping everything that makes up your life kind of clean and then calling in what is going to stay. This starts from the moment you wake up. And I am not saying that I am always waking up every morning in this blissful state of like, ah, today I try very hard. However, it is in those moments where I catch myself just moving through the motions or being on autopilot, which we'll get into, that really pull me back to this. Oh, I need to reassess, I need to do a check-in because I am just waking up and diving right into the kind of checklist of life that we get set up with. So when I invite you to honestly just sit with yourself in, and this can be a really hard question to ask yourself and be honest about, and don't weigh it one way or the other, but just honestly meet yourself with this. But like, are you living or are you just existing in your life and the life that is in front of you? This can be a really challenging question to ask yourself. I ask clients this all the time, and I've sat with this myself thinking I was in a really good place and being like, oof, there's some things I need to change. Living, you're actively engaging, you have joy and purpose and passion in your life. Existing is that survival, that autopilot, you're going through the motions of your daily life, essentially. You're doing your routines, you're paying your bills, and there just isn't this deep fulfillment, which I think we forget sometimes that at the end of the day, even if you did all the to-do things and you went to work and you collected your paycheck and you fed your kids and you have a bed to sleep in and a roof over your house, are you really like sitting in that? Because that can be absolutely enough. But are you one aware of it? And two, are you creating that joy or are you just going through the motions? Whether you are coming off a big successful season or you're coming out of a bit of a harder chapter, this is a time to stop, pause, and reflect. We live in a society where I think it's a huge disservice in this mindset of living like next, next, next, very success-driven, very goal-driven, but never this like stop, pause, reflect, and celebrate or honor what you've been through and acknowledge what you've learned. Whether you are coming out of that big chapter or that hard chapter, now is a time to really see what is in alignment, what is taking your energy, what's fulfilling you, and letting whatever doesn't meet that to just fall the fuck away. I want to dive in a little bit into autopilot. Autopilot was where I used to live. I was the entrepreneur, the mom, the woman who flips the big fucking calendar page, writes in all the shit that needs to be done, the school calendars, my work calendars, all the things that people are expecting of me. And then just looking down and being on autopilot, doing my damn thing. I was building a business. I was keeping up with the pre-commitments I had already set up for myself. I was a mom. I was doing more in my household than I probably should have. That was where a sharing piece in my marriage needed to come up. And I lived here for a really long time. And it did cause burnout. And I do remember waking up to go to work and just like feeling no joy, no passion. And it wasn't that I didn't love parts of what I did. It was just that I'd been doing it for so long. My days were so packed. Um, that was my flex, as I've spoken to before. I had I knew where I needed to be, what I needed to do, go to bed, start all over again the next day. And things that used to fulfill me just became things that I did. And I think that's a huge piece of our awareness. And these are the things that if we just hunker in and we keep doing them, that is when the universe will slap you upside the face and be like, okay, this isn't your purpose. This isn't bringing you joy, you're feeling stuck. Slap, we're gonna give you something to make you have to so blatantly in your face need to reflect on what's important to you and make some shifts. And so, what I love to do is invite people, those that are open, the clients um that I work with, the people I host in my retreats, to let's maybe catch those signs before we get slapped upside the face. And so that is allowing moments in your day to stop, to lift your head, to breathe, reflect, wipe the slate clean. We're gonna get there. But this is a time today, this season, we are in the beginning of a new month, a new season, and one of the best seasons to really lean into what you really want in your life and to test some new things out. It's a time to really start fresh in avenues that you feel like you need to, and to get an alignment, a chance to connect with your body, your mind, your heart, come out of that next mindset because time just goes whoosh and you don't even really remember what you did because you just had your head down moving through the motions. So today I invite you, full permission slip, to allow yourself to pause, to allow yourself to think about shifting and adjusting to meet yourself exactly where you need to be in this chapter. This is something that kind of breaks my heart a little bit, though I know I I had to work through this myself, but asking someone what creates your joy? What brings you happiness? And lots of times it's amazing people in your life, which is great, but like go deeper inward to like you, just like how do you create happiness and joy in your life? What does that for you? It can be even harder to ask yourself, what are your dreams? What do you want to create? Is it new? Is there something existing that you're currently working on that just like lights you up, or is it something totally new? And after burnout and going through the motions, I learned how important this piece of allowing yourself to dream, think outside the box of what you're already doing and really own and allow yourself to essentially dream. This is a flip the page, flip the page into summer, which is just entering if you're listening to this um at the time of recording, but um flipping that page and taking a breath and asking yourself, what am I calling in? rather than flipping it and writing in all the shit and being like, this is what I do, this is what I've always done, this is what I'm comfortable with. But really being like, hey, if I could wipe everything clear, doesn't mean you're getting rid of things. You're keeping the shit that feels good. But you're also calling in new and you're keeping what already feels good. I want to invite you that this next season of your life isn't about expectations. Will everybody understand if you show up in a different way? No. I will tell you right now, and that can be a scary part, especially as a woman, people pleasing. Oof. But you know who will understand are the people who want the best for you, the people who want to grow and shift with you, and the people that really love you. And sometimes what happens when we decide we want more for ourselves, it can trigger other people, people that maybe played bigger roles, that want things to say stay the same. However, that can be a great opportunity for conversations or for growth together, or sometimes for you to just kind of hold yourself in a different space where maybe that person doesn't take up as much space. It takes a lot of courage to shift and to change pieces of your life. That's why it's scary. That's why it's also so exciting and fulfilling. Will everybody be comfortable with that? No. And I really do want you to hear this recording, this discussion about wiping the slate clean isn't external input. This is heart-driven. This is you creating this life that you get to witness and experience and feel, and you deserve to live the best one. Imagine if this life over the next two months or three months or whatever feels comfortable for you this season. Imagine setting this stage for everything ahead. It's a feeling you're creating versus a list of things you need to check off. It's permission, and I love this. This gets me excited. I am a Gemini, so I do like change, but this gives me permission to not need to be the same person, wanting the exact same things all the time, but really acknowledges ourselves, myself right now, and meeting myself with so much compassion that I can have and deserve to make changes, to create joy, to dream, and to chase new things and sprinkle just fresh new things into my life. I have done this professionally many times. Um, I left the corporate world, had my child, stayed home to run a day home. While I was running my day home, created my business, did that for quite a while, and then again had this like, ooh, I can't be doing both. Gave up my daycare, focused on my studio, and then shifted in my studio too when things were starting to feel really yuck during COVID. Being like, okay, I'm getting a little bit of burnt out of this. This isn't filling my cup, and I'm feeling like I'm instead needing to just show up how people want me to, not in a negative way on their end, but just in like, this is what she always does, and this is what people like. However, I also have come to a place, and if you're a client of mine, you know this, but I'll be like, things are gonna change, and change is good. And those of my clients that hate change will be like, uh, I hate change, but they always lean in and it's always fabulous. So, not speaking just professionally, but I have the same conversation with my kids, beginning of every school year and just throughout the year, even. But it's like you don't need to show up to do all the same things that you always did, always. And just because you played a sport last year and the hard one is like maybe you were good at it, but maybe now you're like wanting to go a different avenue or you're just in a different place and you're not feeling really strong and excited about it, then don't. You don't owe that to anyone. However, I think in our society, we've labeled this as like if you were good at something and people saw you and appreciated you doing that, then that is what you do. And to step back from something that you were good at can feel really hard. And I've had to go through this also with coaching. Like I absolutely love coaching, but then I was really called to be supporting youth in a different way. And would I have had the capacity to do both? Absolutely not. Did I get and did I feel like I gave all that I could and that I could then pass the baton to someone else who might need that opportunity? Yes. So coaching has been that. And we'll get into kind of the friendship and the places you find yourself, but it is ultimately a permission slip. I hand to my kids and I hand to myself and my husband all the time of like, we're allowed to change. Not everyone's gonna love it, it's not gonna be comfortable all the time. Sometimes it's scary. But if you aren't excited and loving and feeling fulfilled in your day, something needs to change and you need to lean into living, dreaming, and creating something new. So the first step, I think, is meeting yourself and awareness of what your life currently feels like. For lots of people, they're like, things are good. But then when you really hold space, and this is like a muscle, the more you do it, the easier it gets, and you'll start to get more comfortable with understanding that oh, we're going into a season of change. Oh, this is feeling like a good time to wipe the slate clean. It's epic and it's incredibly exciting and it's awesome. So at least buy in on this episode and listen to what I gotta explain and then take it or leave it. But I would really love to see you on the other side of how we kind of get there. Awareness. So allowing yourself to first meet yourself, acknowledge where you are at. How are you actually fucking feeling? Are you exhausted? Have you been telling yourself that things are really good, but you're actually exhausted? Or maybe you are feeling so good about something in your life, and that's awesome. Celebrate that as we're going into a new season. I think it's a good opportunity to look at where have you been? What have you actually been doing this last while? Because sometimes I think we need to give ourselves credit for starters, and also we just sometimes feel like we did so much, but maybe you actually didn't do a lot and you're just exhausted because you're bored as fuck. And I honestly think that's it more often than not. If you're a parent, also let's remember that the busy schedules, the season endings can be from a lot of runaround parenting, kids' activities. And I don't know how deep you are into that, but that can take a lot. And honestly, sit with or were your kids super happy? Were they loving all of that? Did that fill their cup? Or was it a thing that you felt like you needed to do because you used to do it, or because everyone else is doing it? My friend and I have already spoken about this, but were you actually doing lots of things and you're tired from living the life? Or is it a going through the motions autopilot thing? Or maybe you've spent this last while really working on something that feels so good and you're thrilled about, and you were somewhere that is just leaving you in such a great place. But maybe that's coming to an end, maybe it's continuing. Just really allowing some awareness and reflection. Asking yourself, where do you want to go? And where do you want your energy to go? Energy is ultimately what we have, it's what we run off of. It's an exchange in everything that we do in our life. Where do you want all of your vitality and your energy and your excitement and your love to go? And is it already going there? Do we need to adjust because we're going into a neat new season? Can we tweak that a little bit and play around with where it goes? And always, always, always, whenever I do the wipe the slight clean, we'll get into how I practice this, but how much do you have to give? This very much can depend on what you're going through in life, if you're in the middle of something busy, or if you're coming off something great, but really honestly asking yourself without judgment, how much do you have to give? What is your current capacity? If you're coming off a busy season and you're exhausted, it might be a good time to honor that and be mindful of what the next couple months or this next little chapter looks like. If you have a lot coming up or your capacity is low, do you need help? Like moms, parents, this is a real great time to either own A, do I have capacity? Yes or no? Honest, hard to sit with question because then you might be meeting that people pleasy part of you too that just wants to push, push, push. Guess how we get to burnout. So asking yourself the capacity question is so huge because A, it can let you then decide I need to drop something. Something has to kind of get dropped away so that I'm not going into burnout. Secondly, then you're not being the person that flakes out or cancels last minute because insert shame cycle in your mind, also. And also, what a great time in advance to ask for help. Knowing your capacity is massive and being really honest about what your capacity actually is. And we'll get into this because there's so many things at play with that. And then what's going well, what isn't? What are you actually dreading? And ooh, I have woke up, you guys have all done this. We commit to something, we overcommit, or we say yes to something, but we shouldn't have. And we're dreading, dreading it. You know how much energy dreading something takes from us? And first acknowledging that is the biggest step. I feel like one of the biggest pieces that I had to own in my life was sitting with that. Like, what are the things I'm saying yes to that feel heavy as fuck in my life, but I keep saying yes to, or I don't ask for help with. And those are the things that like carry a heaviness in your physical body too. They can be hard conversations, they can be undone tasks, they can be commitments that we should have said no to. Ask yourself, real honestly, and this is a somatic practice that I like to do with myself, but literally being like, oof, where am I feeling heaviness and why? Where is this coming? From and before I can wipe a slate clean, what can I do to take care of that? We will get into this deeper, but also the places that you found yourself, who you were surrounded by, who you're wanting to spend your time with, acknowledging what you've learned in this past chapter and allowing yourself to really decide, dream, and honor your self-worth. It's like that quick little awareness check-in of like, how am I actually before I step forward? Stopping for just a moment in this absolute race of life and being honest with yourself. How are you actually? Okay, so you're first honest with yourself. Are you living or are you existing? Are you on autopilot? Huge. Then the awareness, little checkpoints about where you've been, how you're actually feeling. Moving forward. I think it's really important to continue to plot in little checkpoints. These are the huge things that have shifted my life. Rather than just moving, moving, moving forward, doing the things, they're checkpoints where I check in on myself and get to recreate. I hate, hate January New Year's resolutions because, first of all, we're in the dead of winter. Secondly, for lots of people, there's this feeling like that's it for the year. Those like three goals you set for yourself, that's it. And then it allows no check-in time throughout the year to honor if that's still really what you want. And then people check out. Also, I think New Year's resolutions always feel really forceful or they're real general. They're like, these are the things I should want. Weight loss to move more, to be healthier, or to travel. And like, then that's it. That's where you're throwing out the year, which is why ugh, I never coach New Year's resolutions like fucking ever. So I want to start by speaking to how I stay intentional about living versus existing, how I continually wipe the slate clean. It keeps the whole damn year exciting to you guys because I can literally recreate my life and myself and my family has thankfully gotten used to this. It was a push for Alan with some of these things because I also challenge him with these things. Um, and it can be really hard. It's so much more comfortable and easy to just keep doing the things you always do in the places with the people that you always do the damn thing. But that ain't living. If you're comfortable your whole life, you're not oof, living. So checkpoints are huge. I'm gonna talk about the checkpoints that I use. I'm going to say it's way easier with a community. Um, this is what I coach in my business. I always do it first for myself. And I do support my family through these similar practices, unless there's big resistance, because I'm not gonna try and take something really fun and force it on my family. But um, professionally and personally, these are really huge. And so I'm gonna go through them and then you can kind of just sit, sit with which one lights you up or which one might feel attainable and like a good way to connect with yourself. And you might think I'm full of shit that I do all these checkpoints, but I 100% do. And it is, I've literally watched things that I want to create for myself, insert this podcast, then matter and be checked in on or adjusted because this podcast has been on my list for I think four years, and I just wasn't there yet. However, all the things I did in the meantime literally got me here. And I think it's also, I didn't actually put this in my notes, but I think it's also a huge connection to manifestation because you're getting really clear on what you want. So, first of all, I don't do New Year's resolutions, but I do a yearly snapshot of the year. I'm a very visual person, and for me, I think of the year in four little chapters. They are seasons, which I'll get into, but I love doing this, and this is probably my fourth or fifth year of doing so, but choosing a few words that represent how I want to feel or focus on moving into the new year. I always like to come up with these through a meditation or through journaling or just being able to sit with myself and like again, I'm very visual, but like imagining myself moving through the next 12 months and where I want that energy to really go. They will become my anchor points that I continue to lean into and do check-ins. Then as I move through the year, I usually do a check-in around April, a check-in around June or July, and then a check-in around September. And my words can change or shift, but they allow me to remember a feeling of where I was hoping to move through. So my three words are always how I start my new year and those check-in points throughout the year. Underneath each of those words are some intentions. So, what um what that word would represent. So I know one of mine last year was connection. To me, that meant really connecting with my husband. I was hoping we could travel. Um, I had written down just like not thinking thoughts, but just some dreams of what that might look like. And it ended up finding us in Bali at a retreat together and spending a week just connected just the two of us. It also really represented that everything I did in my life needed to have purpose and meaning. I wasn't putting myself in places where things were superficial. If it wasn't a full body yes, which I'll get into, then it was a no. In my coaching programs, what I love about my year-long coaching is self-check-ins with people to be able to stay committed to yourself, setting yourself up for accountability and support. And it builds that community and connection where four months can go by so fast, and you're like, oh shit, I need to like check in. How is life? And that seems so insane, but literally, how is life? How are things going? Am I happy and feeling joy in my life, or am I feeling stuck? Because guess what? Then it's a good time to get honest with yourself about what needs to change. I still, even as a coach, have people, friends, or other women that are doing similar work to me that we connect to be able to then check in on ourselves and keep each other accountable. It's so huge. A year can go by so fast, and we can have our heads down if we don't allow those little check-in points. Then, as mentioned, seasonally. So, this is, I would say, in my life, I run seasonally, personally in my life, but also in my professional life. Uh, we are meant to flow with the seasons. If you are in hustle and you look outside and it's the dead of fucking winter and you're wondering why you have no energy, there we go. Like I have really learned to adjust and to meet myself with the seasons. I will absolutely be doing an entire episode on this because I think it's so huge, but I'm always reflecting back to the outside world. That's where we're really supposed to exist, and nature's always doing it right. We need different focus, we have different energy, we need different intentions and expectations of ourselves in every single season. So I like to kind of think of life as a garden. And so spring, you're starting a new year, you're planting the seeds of what you want for the year. Sometimes I'll dial this back to more February, sprinkle that in just because it's the Chinese New Year and also that's the start of my year. Um, summer, we're nourishing those seeds that we planted. We're trusting and we're we're practicing patience. A good time to really dive into self-care routines. Fall is about harvest, celebrating all the things that came to life in spring and summer, reflecting on what went good, what maybe didn't go so well, reaping the rewards, and then just kind of like harvesting that and storing it. And then winter is really meant to be retreating, going inward, reflecting, processing. When I started really focusing on living that way myself and running my business that way, the September to June programming for kids felt so fucking gross and heavy because winter is not meant to be chaos. And oh my God, the weather outside is also inviting that. And I'm not saying kids aren't supposed to be busy, but if you're wondering why you're so fucking tired in the winter, like it's literally a season of darkness and it's supposed to be a season of slowness and retreating. So adjusting my own business changed my expectations on what I need to be able to create and hold space for, and also changed very much my personal care of myself and my health. Imagine for a minute with me, if you were to treat yourself and your life like a garden and you move through your year with different intentions for each season. So I run my sessions in business in length with the season. So my soul dives, my yogas, my group training. Um, from a business perspective, fall feels like the start of my new year, just because that is how our society's set up with school and everything. So I always go fall to November. That's a busy ass season for me. Then December, I back right off my business and slow down because guess what? People are also burnt out and are supposed to be going inward and retreating. So December is a slower month. I do more pop-ups and things that are more in reach of people, as I know everyone's living busy lives and not the same. I know people don't live in seasons like I do, but invitations there. Um, then I run January to the end of March. That is my programming for that. Then April to June, and those are busy. January to March is huge. April to June is a little bit slower because again, kids stuff is really crazy. So I myself dial back a little bit in June. And then July and August, I sprinkle in what feels good for me because summer is short. It's my time with my kids. Um, and I do from a business standpoint, I do the yearly, like these are the things I'm thinking about. But then seasonally, I literally, I'm very visual, print off calendars three to four months so I can see the flow. I can see like this is the this is the chapter. What do I want for it? And I'll map it out and lay it out. I also sync everything with the moon. So I'm mindful of that as well. I have really tried self-care wise and how I live my life to also really honor and adjust my life and my wellness according to seasons. And you know, I want to share this just because this is really huge, but um, I've been doing a lot of work with my health in this last bit. I just got my naturopathic blood work back, and I got told like the the insanely low amount of inflammation in my body for my age, like was a huge deal to my naturopath. And I instantly was like, it's because of how I've adjusted my life seasonally, how I live with my cycle and with the moons, and how huge that has been in supporting my body because I no longer go hustle, fucking hit the button in January, hustle till December, take a week or two off, and then boom, January hit the hustle button again. And I do that with my family as well. We have these chats about making sure that we aren't too busy and that we are honestly honoring the seasons. That is not how a lot of the world lives, but I tell you, I speak to this all the time and people want to be there. It's a beautiful place to be. It also you can feel an energy shift when you honor the solstices and the equinoxes and you adjust your life accordingly. Because we're literally just a week, almost, oh I guess almost two weeks past um summer solstice, which means that the days are now getting shorter. We've reached kind of the day with the most amount of light, and now we are coming back, which is sad, and I don't want to talk about it much. But this is a great time to reset to get really clear on where you're spending these next few months. Each season has a deep invitation, and summer is short here. If we could please, my homeschool year, we ended in April, and I had April, May, June, July, or sorry, May, June, July, August to just summer. And I feel like Canada would be a better place if we would just do that because then people would have four months to enjoy summer instead of jamming it into two. But it is short here, and it's it often feels like we have to cram everything into these two months and be busy and big energy. But the words for summer are actually nourish patience and trust. We planted those seeds in spring. Summer is about taking care of yourself, about resting, and about just like really trusting that all the work you did up till this point is going to be able to bring value and harvest and nourishment to us for the winter. A great time to lean into self-care routines. We do have a bit more energy, so that can be a great invitation. Like, where do you have to get really clear about how you need to take care of yourself? But summer is also about letting go of control. The opposite of what I think we do. We book those holidays and we book all the things and we're do-do-do-do. But it is about letting go of control, being in the moment, and just trusting. What do you want? What are you calling in? Um, this can be a good time too because the weather is more supportive of making changes in our self-care routine and ultimately just taking better care of ourselves. Um, but be real honest. What do you want for yourself this summer that you might be able to then trickle into fall and winter when things are a little bit heavier or darker? You'll already have those beautiful routines created and you'll be feeling good about yourself. So then I go into weekly. So I try my best to do weekly because this is what keeps me grounded and honest about my capabilities and the capacity that I have to hold in my life. I, like most women, have ADHD tendencies. My brain could fucking explode from the amount of things that I could do if I wanted to in my week, or the expectations that are put on me, even, and my thought patterns. So do this however you need. But each week, I'm a paper-to-pen girl, I have a notebook, I write out the days of the week, and it isn't a to-do list. It is literally my like, okay, these are the things that I don't want to forget that really matter, that have to get done. I plot in what that looks like. And yes, I also have a schedule, but this is different than a schedule. This is my like, these are the things I need to put my energy into because they're not just work-focused or kids event focused. These are like just the little things in life that need to get done so I don't procrastinate. So, for one, for me, the things that I think I'm gonna forget or are super important, those go in first. If they're things that I can't forget about, they get put on the next page so that I just remember the next week to reevaluate where they need to get put in. If I have a lot of things to get done, like this week, um, prepping for holidays, there was work stuff that needed to get done. There were things to prep for holidays, there were also some school events I was volunteering at, and I had to take care of myself. And I want to wanted to connect with one of my friends before I left on holidays, and I had coaching clients I needed to check in on. So I needed to put those into my week so that I'm not overwhelmed. So I know each day my couple of things that have to get done, and then I know that at the end of the week I won't have forgot anything. I will have, as long as I kind of followed those couple little things for each day, I would meet my goals. I like to think of it as my don't fuck around list. It's my like, this has to be done this week. This shit matters. Where is it going? Spread it out so that you can be successful and not burnt out, which I really have to do, even like putting my garden stuff in, because I every day I also have to be like, what's my body's capacity? I move slower, I can't expect the same amount of things to be done. So this is kind of my like energy calculator and spreading things out so I can feel good at the end of the day, and not like I've done in the past, putting 20 things on a to-do list where only realistically I could get five things done, and then the next day trying to carry over 15 items that didn't get done into an already packed day. So weekly, these are my check-ins. What really matters, what has to be focused on or have energy accounted for so that I can be successful ultimately and not have that inner shame cycle talking. Also, once it's on paper, it's out of my mind and it doesn't have to keep popping up, which is huge if you've got a busy mind. Inserting this in monthly. So every month I like to look at the calendar and see where are we going? What does this month look like? Um, I've already kind of developed my work schedule then for the season, so I can plop my work stuff in. Um, I have a calendar for my family. So putting in their things that are basically non-negotiable, right? Plopping those non-negotiables in. Um, and then once I see those things, like the things that are kind of non-negotiable, my work, my kids' stuff, Alan's stuff, then I can really ask, like, where am I? What is my family have going on? Is it a busy month or a slower month? And I can evaluate what weeks are busy, what weekends are busy, but also where can we put in some rest time versus where is just my busy time? What's really important to me though is that beyond my work, my family, the kids, the non-negotiables are things that matter outside of that. So um, my coaching clients all know about this, but I like to coach kind of bubbles, putting bubbles on a piece of paper that represent each avenue of holistic health and wellness. So that we'll get into this, but so each bubble is just labeled kind of to represent what's important. So we got our daily habits and routines, time with self, family life, social and friends, relationship, marriage, work, home, education or growth, and finances. You don't have to use all of them. You can just use whatever feels good for you. However, my rule is that we can have something that we're focusing on in each of those avenues each month, but you aren't allowed to have more than three items in a bubble. And so this has been really huge for me because there's months where I'm like, okay, I'm focusing on my finance. I'm I see that the kids are really busy, so connection with my kids is really huge. And maybe it's like a season where I'm really focusing on my finances or I'm focusing on my um business stuff, whatever it might be, it just kind of lays things out so that you can know where your intentions are, where you kind of want your energy to go and what is priority outside of the non-negotiables that might be on your calendar. This isn't drawing all these bubbles and then feeling like you need to put to-do lists under each of them. They have to be really meaningful, they have to have a part of you that gets you excited and really locked in on this is what matters to me this month, because you can't have 80 things in each bubble and do a good job of putting energy into all of those. I'm also, if you didn't know, huge about the moon. The moon, aside from seasons, is a huge piece of how I navigate my business and my personal life. Fact, yesterday I said to my family, I was like, Oh my gosh, I'm so emotional. I think I cried like during a movie and everyone was annoyed. They're like, Oh my god, mommy. I think it was a murder documentary, and I was like, just heartbroken. And just like everything, last day of school, that makes me teary-eyed. There's some events that happened in our community that were really heartbreaking. And yeah, I was like, oh my gosh, though, I am super emotional. And I'm like, oh, of course, there's a full moon on Monday. And I've been, I've finished all of my soul dive groups and stuff until the summer. And so yeah, I forgot for a moment in my hustle of getting ready for holidays that, yeah, holy shit, there's a full moon. So no wonder I'm emotional. I will also do an entire episode on moon phases because this is huge in how I navigate my life. I think for me too, there's also a piece of it's where I kind of really dove into my healing. It's where it really grounded me. And I like I feel it in my body. I can tell where the moon phases are at. So that's been really huge. Also, I've had like huge manifestation things on a new moon, things I've called in that legit came to life the next week and things that I would have never thought were possible. And I've also had some massive releases around full moons that maybe were things that I was asking to be be released, and there's some real big ones that I couldn't even believe things that fell away that I needed to, and then things falling away that I didn't know I needed to in the moment, but that I can now sit here and be like, yep. So the new moon is about manifesting. It's a in my practices, it's slower, it's more inward. And in full moon, it's more about release, bigger energy, a little bit more outward um reflection, but it also the moon ties in with your cycle. Um, women used to gather new moons, full moons. Um, and really we're supposed to bleed too much information. Sorry if the guys are listening, but um, I think it's important to know that yeah, women are supposed to bleed at the full moon, and I am fully synced up with that. So it's just like season changes each week. And oh my gosh, insert another episode for this. So each week in a month, women, these are things we should know. So important, are like the seasons. So winter is when we have menstruation, but there's our full moon, a deep time of rest reflection turning inward. Spring is the follicular phase. That's when energy begins to rise. You get fresh ideas, brainstorming, you're better for creative projects. Summer is during ovulation, peak energy, more social, best suited for action, collaboration, launching ideas. Fall is luteal phase, so you're winding down. It's a phase for tying up loose ends, wrapping up projects, boundaries. So guess what? As you've been on autopilot, no shame to you, with your head down, moving through your months, through your seasons, you're literally every week facing new energy that is seasonal based on the moon and based on your menstruation. So um the month is so important to look at. I use it now in entrepreneurship too, because I know now which are my big weeks where I'll have energy and I can do big things and which are my weeks that I need to dial back and expect less from myself because I'll be more emotional or I'll have less energy. I also speak to this all the time with my female athletes because guess what? We need to adjust our training. My high performance athletes, I'm sorry, I try my best, but like if you're a high performance athlete, you are always working against these natural phases. But our training, our movement, our exercise, those all need to adjust week to week based on where we're at in our cycle. So moon phase and cyclical living, I'll do a whole frigging episode on it. Um, so huge and why it's so important to look at your month. Should you do a huge presentation on a week that you are lower energy, less creativity, not always available to choose when those things are launched. However, if you can, a great way to pay attention to what you're asking of yourself in what week and what season. I thoroughly love and enjoy that every month I get to kind of redesign where my energy is going, who I get to be, what I'm putting into my business, how I'm showing up for my family. Um, and it's a big practice for me to meet my journal. I usually do card pulling, and I have some really great friends, as well as my studio community, that I get to lead and guide into kind of the deeper emotional stuff around each moon, each month. So I think they go hand in hand, moon and month. Even if you're a man, um, monthly check-ins so huge on what's ahead and how are you managing that. So then I go into weekly. So I try my best to do weekly because this is what keeps me grounded and honest about my capabilities and the capacity that I have to hold in my life. I, like most women, have ADHD tendencies. My brain could fucking explode from the amount of things that I could do if I wanted to in my week, or the expectations that are put on me, even, and my thought patterns. So do this however you need. But each week, I I'm a paper-to-pen girl, I have a notebook, I write out the days of the week, and it isn't a to-do list. It is literally my like, okay, these are the things that I don't want to forget that really matter, that have to get done. I plot in what that looks like. And yes, I also have a schedule, but this is different than a schedule. This is my like, these are the things I need to put my energy into because they're not just work-focused or kids event focused. These are like just the little things in life that need to get done so I don't procrastinate. So, for one, for me, the things that I think I'm gonna forget or are super important, those go in first. If they're things that I can't forget about, they get put on the next page so that I just remember the next week to re-evaluate where they need to get put in. If I have a lot of things to get done, like this week, um, prepping for holidays, there was work stuff that needed to get done. There were things to prep for holidays, there were also some school events I was volunteering at, and I had to take care of myself. And I wanna wanted to connect with one of my friends before I left on holidays, and I had coaching clients I needed to check in on. So I needed to put those into my week so that I'm not overwhelmed. So I know each day my couple of things that have to get done, and then I know that at the end of the week I won't have forgot anything. I will have, as long as I kind of followed those couple little things for each day, I would meet my goals. I like to think of it as my don't fuck around list. It's my like, this has to be done this week. This shit matters. Where is it going? Spread it out so that you can be successful and not burnt out, which I really have to do, even like putting my garden stuff in, because I every day I also have to be like, what's my body's capacity? I move slower, I can't expect the same amount of things to be done. So this is kind of my like energy calculator and spreading things out so I can feel good at the end of the day, and not like I've done in the past, putting 20 things on a to-do list where only realistically I could get five things done, and then the next day trying to carry over 15 items that didn't get done into an already packed day. So weekly, these are my check-ins. What really matters, what has to be focused on or have energy accounted for so that I can be successful ultimately and not have that inner shame cycle talking. Also, once it's on paper, it's out of my mind and it doesn't have to keep popping up, which is huge if you've got a busy mind. All right, and you might say bullshit, but I do this practice daily most days. Um, I like to start my day with my hand on my heart. I like to ask my body what it needs, what I need to do today for work, what I need to do for play and joy, and whatever I'm open to. And usually a couple things come up, and I always trust those. I think it's so important that when we set our intentions for our day, it isn't just those to-do things. I lived a really long time where that was it. And I do really like to be like, what do I need to do? There's always that work piece, but what do I need to do for myself, for my self-care? What does my body need, but also that play and joy? And then I always make sure those three things that my heart gives me, that my body guides me to are honored. They're not the things that fall away. In my most intense kind of self-care seasons, I like to start with the Reiki prayer that I've shared previously. I like to ground and ask myself this. And then I allow my intuition and yeah, those things are priority. Whatever my kind of inner voice tells me needs to be prioritized. This can be a really great practice to start on holidays. If you don't have a big scheduled day ahead, it's like, what do I need today? And then maybe you see a vision or maybe things come to mind, but they're spoken in a really beautiful way and the body will feel really open to them. There won't be like a heavy hardness to them. So if you at this time are just kicking off summer holidays, a really great chance to start. But that daily practice of honoring what you need, how you need to move, how you need to nourish yourself, maybe a little bit of the responsibility pieces, and then always, always, always that play and joy. And that usually brings me to connection with the people in my life that I love. I know it might seem crazy, but that is every day, then putting yourself first before anything else allows you to every day meet yourself and your life, your thoughts, your daily habits with fresh eyes and allows you to move through your day in alignment versus what you thought the previously, the previous day was important. Because let's be honest, every day we wake up, our bodies are a little bit different and we need to meet ourselves exactly where we are at. And so those are certainly not all the ways to add checkpoints into your life, but start with whatever feels good for you, whether it be the yearly kind of calling in what you're what you're doing for the year, your words, maybe you're doing it seasonally, doing check-ins with yourself. I always like to mark on the calendars like they are celebrations, those season changes, and even doing some digging into what each of the seasons represents and how that might resonate with you. Then you can also do monthly little check-ins so that you can see what your month looks like, line up with the moon or all my lady friends the with your cycle. And even if you are menopausal, go off of the moon phases. That's how you um still stay in tune with your physical body. And then for some of you, you might lean into that weekly practice to kind of just ensure you have the capacity that you need. I like doing the weekly practices, literally see where I'm at with my energy, with my cycle. Um and then daily. So doing whatever sort of practice to do that like daily check-in to see how you are doing and remembering that your daily practice might then be like, oh, I need to make some adjustments because adjustments and changes are welcome. Nothing is ever set in stone. However, you do it, remember this is your practice. And I literally have to plot them into my calendar um to remind myself to do these check-ins. That doesn't mean you're doing a shitty job, but but it happens. So um what is most important is that you allow it to be a chance to recreate yourself, your life, how you want to feel your thoughts, your daily habits, and how you move through your day. Start with whatever feels good for you, but make sure that it creates excitement, a freshness, a new start kind of feeling. Not new start like everything before was shitty, just like new creation, realignment. Remembering it can be adjusted, as I said, but what do you want to see yourself doing with your time, your energy, your money this year, with who and where? And I always love a good card pull. All right, so we have decided that we get to wipe the slate clean and decide where our energy goes, what we're doing. We can develop these anchor points, these checkpoints, however, you want to integrate that into your life, whatever feels good. But what I think is really important, and this is something I missed and maybe ignored for a really long time, was feeling into my body for some guidance. So I want to speak briefly to a full body yes and a full body no. Those are signs from your body about what you're holding, what your own body's messages are, what feels good and what feels challenging. To clarify before I jump in, because I see these things on social media, a full body no doesn't mean you're saying no, you're avoiding, you're ignoring, you're checking out. And a full body yes doesn't mean, ooh, I want to do this and I'm super comfortable with it, and this will be easy. Very big difference. So starting with that full body no, this is a huge point where you can grow. And this is what I really truly lean into. When I think back to being a kid, this was like tight stomach, tight jaw, tight throat, um, showing up physically in my body. And now as an adult, when I notice that I'm feeling any of that, I'm like, okay, what am I either avoiding? What am I carrying, maybe procrastinating, or what am I just not facing that is feeling heavy in my body? This lots of times means out of alignment in my experience with this. But what it can also mean when I say growth point is that maybe this is a hard conversation you have to have. Maybe this is being in a role that we no longer feel like we should be in. This can also involve saying no to people or being real honest with yourself about maybe something that you've been putting off or a conversation you honestly might need to just have with yourself. So I will literally usually stop with my journal and be like, okay, what feels heavy? And I'll just intuitively journal what comes up and then I'll be like, what feels really good? And it is the what feels heavy that has made me really honor my self-worth and my love and allowed me to learn about myself and my behaviors, but also learned behaviors that I just act out of, even though they might not be in alignment with me. This signals to me a time often to phase out some things or simply end some things just aren't feeling good anymore. It can also be whatever's causing that ick. So procrastination or distracting or avoiding things that you need to just fucking deal with because they're getting more energy from you physically and emotionally and energetically than it would probably take just to get the task done. It can also represent the places you find yourself in or the people you find yourself around. This has been a hard one for me in my life because people come and go in seasons too. So though we might feel this like really hard energy or this heaviness in our body about someone, it isn't necessarily a reflection of that person or your relationship with them, but it might just signify that like something needs to be addressed, something needs to shift. It doesn't mean ignore or avoid, but honoring what it is that you're feeling and tending to it before you try to then move forward because that will ultimately, I think, pull you back continuously. And I think a lot of the times these are those like forced gatherings or get-togethers where people always have had you attend or you've always showed up, and maybe you're just like not feeling it, and saying no to that or having people upset with you about that could be a thing. We'll get dive a little deeper into some of these things, but um also it could just be a general feeling of stuckness, like knowing that there is more or a heaviness of you ignoring the things that might bring you joy, the new things, the new habits, or the new hobbies, or a new relationship, whatever it might be, and holding yourself back in that place of not being able to move towards it can also signal that full body no. Pay attention though to your full body no's. That's also that intuitive feeling of like, I feel like I shouldn't go to this. Maybe there is a deeper reason to that. So sometimes it's a good one to sit with and honor, like, oh, something's feeling off in me. Um, what is it? And also sometimes it's just move your body or smud yourself or do something just to move that. But a lot of times it's the things that we are just either on autopilot on or ignoring. And if it is those things, do the damn thing, bump it to the top of your list, then dust your hands free of it. It will take out that negative thinking, that overthinking, that you know how we judge ourselves because we've been putting something up, and then it just keeps popping up in our head, and we have to keep having this conversation about, oh, I know I haven't dealt with that, oh, I know I still have to do this. Oh, it's something that I'm really just feeling resistance to. Honor that. Those are full body no's and they take a lot from you. And then there is the full body yes. And the full body yes feels exciting but nerve-wracking, and maybe just really open. Um, we can tend to numb ourselves a little bit with this one too, because autopilot, we just don't allow that new fresh energy to come in. Even if you think, oh, I can't do that because of, or you come up with a million excuses, I want you to really trust that feeling. Our body never lies, and our heart and intuition is truly our compass. So within the body, when we feel this yes or an eagerness, it's usually the things we think about all the time, but we dismiss for later because yeah, they're exciting, but they probably involve prioritizing yourself, steering a new direction, getting a little bit uncomfortable, or dreaming a little bit and believing that things could actually work out in that direction. It is that feeling that you lean into as to what you're called to focus on and put your energy into now. We will dive into all the things in a minute here. What makes you nervous? Is this actually excitement? Nerves, whenever I start something new, there are huge nerves. But on the other side of those nerves is excitement. And if it makes you nervous, lean the fuck in when there's that good excitement feeling too. And sometimes that feeling is also just imposter syndrome that kind of holds you back. That's where the juicy good stuff is, though. And so this is the next step kind of shit. This is where we create the things that make us excited. It's one little step forward. It's signing up for one thing, it's finding yourself in a new place, connecting with a new person, whatever that might be, but wiping the slate clean and allowing yourself to lean into those full body yeses. Those are the things that get us excited to get out of bed in the morning and that we dream about all damn day. I think what's really important with both full body yes and full body no is to understand to keep your expectations and the things that you think might be causing that, drop those expectations. Because when we come off autopilot and we want to then be open, you need to be open because there might be no's that you thought actually were in alignment that aren't. And there might be some yeses, things that you would have never imagined finding yourself in, or things that you thought you wanted that just aren't actually. So really trust the body, sit, hold space for it. There will always be that like yes and no feeling, but when you allow yourself to actually sit. Sit in it and check in on the body and honor whatever the sensation is. You can learn so much about where you are, what your heart and soul want to do, and where your compass is trying to lead you. So when you are wiping the slate clean, there are so many different things to think about. And I think avenues to check in on because we disconnect from some of them. As I mentioned, we're gonna go through these, but are areas of a holistic wellness. First one is physical environment. So where do you spend your time in your day? And does it feel good? Have you even noticed? And are there rooms that you're in that really aren't for you or take away or take more than they actually give back to you? This could be as simple as my house is a fucking mess and I need to clean it up. This can be working in a place that just is not feeling in alignment anymore. This can be registering for, I don't know, events or volunteering or whatever it might be, or spending even too much time inside versus outside. Keep like your mind really open on that and what feels good. What spaces do you feel good? Or what is in a space that makes you feel good? Not thinking about the people here so much. We'll get into that, but just the physical environment and playing with how you can maybe adjust that. Maybe it's spending a little bit less time in rooms that don't feel good, or getting your ass outside, whatever that might look like. Your physical environment, we are we take in the energy that we are surrounded in. And you know, I do this practice all the time, but when you walk into a space, notice how your body feels because it'll tell you a lot of it'll give you a lot of feedback and also notice what you're drawn to. Physical space is absolutely huge. So is this a time where you need to tweak your own environment, put yourself in some new places, or spend a little bit less in rooms you're already in? Your personal health or daily routines. So this is something that is always changing in my life. Um, it's super annoying because I wish I could just have a routine and stick with it and be done. And then I would know exactly what I need to do. However, my body is always giving me guidance um as to what I need. And again, in speaking to seasonally, this changes month to month, this changes week to week and even daily. Um, but it I always like to lean into like what is your physical body craving? What's your mind and your heart really needing from you? Is it needing to get to bed more often? Is it needing you to move more? Do you need to sprinkle in some meditation or start going for walks or adjusting your how you're fueling yourself, your nutrition, your self-nourishment? Are you just needing to add a little bit more pause into your day? Making sure though that our personal health and daily routines are not what we're told we should be doing, but what really we need to lean into. We can't do everything every day, all the like self-care stuff as I've talked to before, or you'd be so overwhelmed. So being really honest. And sometimes my routines change because I honestly just get sick of my own shit and that inner like self-shame cycle that goes on in my mind when I'm not doing the things that I'm supposed to be doing, calling myself out on my bullshit and just being really honest. So it could be being really tired in the morning and being annoyed that I'm not getting up early while owning the shit that I've been staying up way too late. Um, it can be my mind being really busy and not feeling super present, noticing that I'm being having way too much screen time, or just needing to delegate my time a little bit differently. Or maybe I've been isolating myself a little bit and I need to start getting out there a little bit more and sprinkling in a little bit more, I don't know, outside world stuff. Um, but whatever you need to do, and I think it's really good to just sit and put your hand on your heart or check in on your body. I love coaching people through somatic practices on this and holding space to really sit with like, what do you need? What have you been neglecting? What are you avoiding in taking care of yourself? Because honestly, at the end of the day, that is the most important. That's our temple, that's our one body that we get. And so taking care of body, mind, heart, soul, however, you need work, business, and career. So I know I talk about this lots. Um, we aren't really meant to stay in the same job forever. And so if you're feeling like you're needing a shift, I just always like to throw the permission slip out there that things are never off the table for us. I shifted outside of the corporate world um about 13 years ago, maybe more than that. And I needed more control of my destiny and my hours, the environment I was in, the clients I was working with, and my ability to be creative. But I'm also, as I said, I crave change, and that isn't for everyone. Um, I oh yes, I've been an entrepreneur for about 20 years now. It isn't for everybody, but I needed to get out just because I was not waking up excited for my day. I was burning out from working corporate and trying to side hustle. I was really honestly low running low on compassion. I was working in a physio world with people, not all who wanted to get better. And that was really challenging for me. And I was feeling just kind of stuck in that regard. I also loved running my day home, but hit a point where I was like, ugh, this isn't filling my cup as much as it is. And I don't want these kids to not get all of me and all of my energy. So again, that was something I needed to shift. And the same thing in my fitness world. Um, COVID was really exhausting and really drained the excitement out of it. So I did. I step back, I do less of it. Um, and yeah, not easy, but also it isn't easy to stay with a job that you aren't fully excited and lit up about. And it might not be changing your career, it could be shifting into a different position. It could be taking just a training course so that you can sprinkle in some new piece of it. Um, there's always ways in our career that we can be adjusting or shifting. And if you're feeling stuck, I just really like to remind people there's a million jobs out there and lots of opportunities for training and education, which we'll get to. But if you're feeling stuck, now's a good time just to like ponder where you want to go and start taking some steps. If you're really good where you are, just keep investing in keeping it fresh and exciting for you. So you're not just stuck on autopilot going through the motions. I'm grateful that I took the risk and left my career when I did. Um, but it also there was trade-off, and I need to be very disciplined with myself. I need to continuously be creative to make sure that what I'm offering is exciting and will draw in clientele. But on the flip side of that, I'm really grateful because I would be a terrible employee. I'm not great at asking permission, especially if I want to go watch my kids or volunteer or take time off. So I'm way too stubborn. I chose entrepreneurship, um, but definitely not for everybody. This leads us into personal growth. So I've had many great coaches that I've worked with personally in my own life, and I always have this piece where I think there always needs to be some like reflection or learning or growth or interest to stay, I think, just excited and and be able to feel fresh, I think, all the time is kind of how it is for me. There was a point in my life where I was exhausted from growth. University totally burnt me out. And then when I got into um working as exercise physiologist, there was like always courses and continued education, and I was just kind of tapped out. And so this looks different in different seasons. I am always excited to be learning something new. But here's where you can have room to play. Reading a good book, listening to a good podcast. There are a million courses now, like little mini courses, just to give yourself a little challenge, a little bit of accountability, a little bit of learning about something that you're interested about outside of maybe your workplace. It could be for your own health, your own wellness, or professional development for your career or wherever you're heading. I've even signed up for super fun courses that now, when I reflect, ended up kind of getting me here. I always do them for myself now, though, first. They need to be things that matter to me. But I've taken courses on like the moon and on crystals and on um like little tiny courses for somatic stuff or little breathwork um workshops, stuff that lights me up. And it doesn't matter what it is, it could be any sort of hobby that you even have interest in, but putting your energy into something that will fill your cup and expand your interest and your knowledge and get you excited. I always feel too that when I invest in myself, when I take a course of some kind, it always somehow sprinkles back too into how I show up in my marriage or my home or how I parent, whatever that might be. But it's exciting because if it's interesting to you, it'll ripple back into your life in so many ways. And even if it's just you showing up with more energy and excitement and good vibes. Finances. This used to be one that I felt so good about, and then it was one that I felt so shitty about, just unexpected COVID shit and trying to run a business with all that. And then I got sick of my own shit and was like, okay, I need to start feeling good about money again. And this is a great place for personal growth. Um, finances are so much of an impact on, I wish it wasn't, but it's true in our joy, in our security, and in our worth. We are far beyond that. However, we live in a society where our financial position we feel reflects a lot of what we have to offer. So, really important to check in on what season you're in. Are you in a really good place and you want to just keep moving forward? Are you maybe in a place that you don't even want to dive in because you don't want to know the details? If that's where you are, I have to say I've been there and own your shit. Do some digging, take a course. I took a course on finances, I found a good couple podcasts about finances. I got real honest with myself about budgeting, what my goals were. Um, I've always been so good at managing bills or savings. Um, but when money gets into a place that feels less fulfilling and you feel less confident, that's a great time to really sit with your shit. And then I think it's so important to celebrate yourself when you are reaching your financial goals. But also, I have learned this, and I'm super grateful for one of my coaches who said to me, He was like, Let's remember that money is like nothing else in the world. We only get better by practicing and by making mistakes. However, there's such a bigger piece of shame when finances don't look so awesome. So that's been something that I've really had to work on with myself. Um, just like everything else, I think finances will have highs and they'll have some lows. And we need to really make sure we're not reflecting that that is our worth or what we offer to the world, or that we should be carrying shame. But do make sure you sit with your shit and be really honest about your finances and celebrate them or set some goals and grow and reach them. Um, finance is one I'm gonna do a whole episode on as well, but finances are a form of energy and they flow, they come, they go. And when you can be more open and feel less control and grippy about your finances, um, that can be a beautiful place to live. And it starts with being really honest with yourself and getting really accountable with yourself. All right, relationships slash romance. So this is one I try to continually reflect and adjust. Um, I kind of look at this in a couple different ways. So I always kind of start with my husband or my kids. They're my, as I've said before, like my nuclear family. My kids, it's so important to me that I get time with them. That isn't just between the little hustle things. I want quality, not just leftover time. And I think that's where we really need to be clear and honest with ourselves. It can be really challenging to add more time with your kids if they go to school, if they play sports, if they have little activities, if they want to hang out with their friends. So, what I think is super important is making sure that you're carving that time out. You're reflecting on do we need a family weekend or some days home together? Um, I'll be really honest that I'll pull my kids from school to hang out. They can help me at home or in the yard, they can learn some life skills. I've sit down with them sometimes if they don't go to school and they help me with my books or finances, or they'll go to work with their dad. I think there's a value in that. I personally work a lot of evenings and maybe are a shift worker. Um, so I, as an entrepreneur, will sometimes make my work schedule change depending on what they have going on in their lives. Um, but then I also try to really capitalize on the time that we do have together. Family breakfast and like quality time and connection before they go off to school. It's super important to me to try to send them off to school or drive them and get that connection time, um, picking them up for a lunch date or nights that are available, making sure that we have dinner together or bike rides or board games. Um, I think just family time and connection with me. Yes, friends are important, but so is your roots and your family. So something that I always kind of pull back to. I do refuse for my only time with my kids to be like those quick little drop-offs or weekends or evenings or days off of school. Um, my time with my kids can't just be the leftovers, but I do sometimes catch myself being really honest with what I'm doing with my time when I do have it intentionally with them. Am I actually connecting and being present? Or am I sitting on my phone? Am I watching TV? Am I mentally thinking about work? So making sure that when I am showing up, I'm really showing up. And if I'm feeling like I'm craving some time with them, it's either me needing to adjust my own behavior, be more present, or just really kind of connecting as a family and deciding how we can make that connection a little bit deeper. In my marriage, um, Alan and I put a pretty big emphasis on the fact that we chose to spend our life together. He's the person I want to live my life with, and I truly enjoy his company. So there are some seasons that we're pulled in opposite directions for sure, whether that be our work schedules just being very opposite, um him working out of town and so us not being able to connect maybe during the day or at lunchtime, like crossing paths, or maybe he's out of town, so I'm doing all the kids' pickup and stuff, and then it just has less evening time, or even kids' schedules. We can have one kid going one direction, the other going the other, or if we're coaching or working with a team, sometimes yeah, it just creates a little bit more distance and disconnect between the two of us in those busier seasons. It's super important for us to sprinkle in like a lunch date or a workout together, even just having a coffee after the kids have gone to school together or taking him a coffee. And yeah, those quick little phone check-ins at lunch or on a coffee break just to see how each other's day is going, knowing that we're probably not going to see each other until later in our day. And then after a busy season, though, there's an incredibly intentional check-in and reset. And it's super important that we don't skip this. So ourselves right now are very much coming off a busy sports season and Ellen coaching and me being busy with some work stuff. So um just making sure that we're like having suppers together and that we're carving out time to really connect, not maybe watching TV and rather just visiting um intentional connection that goes beyond just passing each other at the door. Our kids are are at a bit of an age now too, and we've learned this over time how important it is to get even a day together where the kids are somewhere else or we're both entrepreneurs. So if a work busy work season ends, sometimes we'll take a day to just hang out and connect. And there's nothing better, I think, than hanging out all day and then picking up the kids together and I don't know, just feeling like connection, I guess it would be. This can be a really good time for you to just reflect on who you're maybe craving some connection with, where you intentionally want to spend your time with someone in particular. If you are maybe coming out of a relationship, this might be a really big time where maybe you do a little bit more solitude. There's nothing wrong with that. Or maybe you're now looking to connect in a relationship, then maybe you're being really intentional and letting the universe know that like this is something I want to do and coming up with some ways that that might be able to be sprinkled into your life, finding yourself in some places where there could be some new connection. And then the last little avenue of relationships is family and friends. Um, this one's super important to keep doing check-ins on. Are you really craving some connection with a friend who you've been? Every time you see them or you get a text from them, they're like, we gotta connect and get together. Well, now might be the time that you actually reach out and schedule something like pen on paper. This is when we're meeting, and then making sure you you keep that. Um, but maybe you are also always the friend who's always reaching out, doing everything, and maybe boundaries might be the thing, and maybe being more open to receive and a little bit less giving. You need to check in on where your capacity and energy is at currently in the relationships that you're in. This has been a really big one, family and friends, to know that you are allowed when you look at your life and you look at the season you're in and you notice what you're craving, what you're trying to call in. There are seasons where we're more available and there are seasons where we're less available. And people will not always be able to be excited or meet you where you're at in that. But I think it's really important that you need to honor yourself, what you're craving, give yourself permission to make time if connecting with friends and family or relationships are super important this chapter of life. Or if maybe you're coming off that busy season or work has been crazy and you're craving a little bit less, and just setting that boundary and being okay with that for this season. Fun and recreation, especially parents. If you're a parent, please don't have guilt with this one. Yes, you can create fun and recreation as a family also, but don't be saying to yourself, must be nice, or shame on others. If you see other people having fun and creating opportunity for themselves and you are not, because you need to give yourself permission to do this, you need to book it and run with it and don't cancel the fun things or the things that will fill your cup. I think whether you are a single person and or you're a parent, this is the energy that we throw out, and these are the relationships that we call in. And I always coach this and reflect this on myself. But what I demonstrate in my life to the people I'm in relationships with, specifically, I always kind of refer back to my kids. I am modeling as a parent to my children that this is what adulthood should look like. And to the people in my life that I might be calling in or people I'm friends with, that I'm choosing myself. So a mom who is never available to friends or that you cancel your self-care or your fun, you're showing that you need to not prioritize yourself and that your kids should also do the same when they're an adult. That's where I say drop that guilt piece because we literally are modeling that. And if you're not a parent, I will say the exact same thing though. If you make plans and cancel them, that is what you're showing or throwing out to the universe is important in relationships. That you are the person that will make plans and cancel. And that's going to set the tone for the people that you are also calling into in your life. Not only that, it's a way of fun and recreation, is showing ourselves that we're allowed to have joy and play. And if we can't always show up in our life the way we want, energetic and joyful and grounded and taken care of and healthy and in alignment if we are not allowing fun and hobbies and recreation. It might look different in different seasons, absolutely. But what never changes is the value in filling your own damn cup. And what I always say to myself and to my clients is don't take yourself so seriously. Like play and fun are things that we unlearn as we move into adulthood. So switch things up, try something new. What's that like little thing? For my husband, it was pottery. Um, for me, it's like little things like kundalini or going to a movie instead of staying home and doing something more boring, but not taking yourself so seriously. What I do want to say though, these are not appointments because people will think these are your appointments. These are not your lash appointments or your hair appointments or your massage appointments. Those don't count as fun and wreck. That's your physical wellness. And yes, they might be social and you might love the people you get to visit with, but those are not fun and recreation. So don't get those confused because also those appointments can also start taking from you more than you need. And sometimes you need to just drop those and insert something more fun. No guilt, no shame. Allow yourself to just play, have fun, try something new. And lastly, spirituality, meeting yourself where you are at with this. For some people, it's religion, universe, creator, the moon, whatever that might be. Maybe this is new to you, maybe this is a long lifetime practice, but do check in on that. I think there needs to be an a piece with the fact that sometimes we lean into it more, and sometimes it's just kind of how we move through our day. But meeting yourself with spirituality, however that looks, if it's not a part of your life, I just want to say that there's so much power in believing in something that you can't physically see. And in the state of the world that we're in right now, we need this the most. This can even start with like meditation or doing some sort of practice to connect with your heart in a new way, find your inner voice, or it can be even getting to nature. Connecting with Mother Earth can be an incredibly spiritual practice or seeing wildlife or whatever kind of makes you just know that you are something so small in a beautiful world that's so much bigger than we could ever imagine or see. As I mentioned when I was talking about bubbles and kind of writing these out, something that's super important is when it comes to focusing on a few aspects. You're wiping the slate clean, you want to put a little bit more energy into something. There's always going to be like, I coach, there's three that feel good, like you're taking, you've done a good job, you're feeling really good about them. And then maybe picking two or three that you want to focus on a little bit more. There is no way you could focus on every single one of these aspects and still have capacity to do and put the energy into it that you want. So just having a nice little sit-down with yourself about what feels good, where am I good? What needs a little bit more attention? And usually the ones that make you a little bit nervous are the ones that you're like, yeah, okay, these are the ones that could use a little bit more loving. So this is where I will now invite you to kind of sit with how this will look. How will you actually do this practice? You can lean into the full body yeses, no's. You can pick kind of the time frame or the way that you want to reflect on this. You can look at your avenues of health and see which ones are really important. And then ask yourself again: Am I living? Am I going through the motions? But seriously, is this it? Are you happy? Are you looking forward to your next day? As mentioned, I always like to start by journaling. What feels really good? What are things I'm dreaming for myself? And if that's hard, try every day to ask yourself something that you're dreaming up. It's easier for some people, it's harder for others, and it also depends on the chapter of life that you're in, and I think the amount of energy that you have in your physical body, but then also sitting with what is feeling heavy and being really honest with yourself and just putting it down on paper. I like to journal. That's just I literally will split my page or I'll write, this is what's feeling heavy, this is what I'm calling in. Um, and then yeah, where do I want to put my energy and where do I want to find myself spending my time? What am I craving for my health, my days, and what will support me in achieving that? Also being really honest with myself about where do I tend to get caught up or distracted? What are my bad habits? And just allowing intuitive journaling, writing down whatever comes up, meaning it with no judgment. I always like to do a couple minutes of meditation before that, and then just open the book and start writing. A big piece of wiping the slate clean is change. We are creatures of habit, yes, but to stay the same and comfortable would be so boring. And it's not what we're intended for in life. But getting uncomfortable, growing, and living is exciting and fresh and allows you to meet yourself over and over again in a new way. It doesn't mean success, it doesn't necessarily need to mean progress or like next level stuff. It's just like being able to meet yourself and your heart and living in a way that feels exciting and good and nourishing. It can be a good practice to honestly just sit with yourself and ask, how does it feel to do something different? There might be something to learn about yourself in that regard. Or what does this teach you about yourself? What does wiping a slate cleaning and allowing yourself to change how you show up and who you are and where you spend your time and who you spend your time with, how does that land with you? You might need to give yourself time to even sit with it. If you're someone who just likes comfortability, I personally learned I needed to do a lot of unlearning as to what life needed to mean, what it needed to look like, um, how much time I needed to put in my work for it to feel successful or unlearn that piece, who I needed to spend my time with, no matter what the world kind of tells us that's supposed to look like, and just making lifestyle choices and health choices that made my heart feel good and allowed me to feel excited in alignment. And yeah, just excited to wake up in the morning. As I mentioned, so I do the journal. Um, and then I always am a visual person. I like my calendar. I like to be able to see the whole month or the whole year or the week, um, and be able to physically kind of feel out what my energy is gonna be like based on what all is on my plate, where my time and energy are going and what the things ahead are. If they're out of the norm, what do I need to adjust? If it's gonna take more from me, or maybe I'm away for work, um, and then being able to adjust, ask for help, um, whatever I might need to call in. But just very much not allowing my month and my life to only be the non-negotiable things, the things that are booked in my life, but rather looking for where is that time that I have or where do I need to put time to create space for the things I'm craving, those aspects of wealth, of health, sorry. Um, yeah, the connection, the finance, but also work and hobbies and oh, all the all the beautiful things. On my physical calendar, I always start with non-negotiables, commitments at work, appointments, um, when I'm away or unavailable, where my and where my energy and time can go. And if there's non-negotiables that you don't want to do anymore, they're out of alignment. This might be a good time to honor that. Give a heads up about canceling or finding somebody else because nobody likes the person that just bails last minute. But a good time to just look ahead and make sure that you can honor the things you might have committed to, really honoring what is bringing my joy. So implementing those things into my calendar, those repeated thoughts or the things I'm putting off that I need to get done so that it can let me feel lighter and allowing myself to dream, really coming out of that thinking brain into the body, maybe like plotting and pencil on your calendar. This is something that would be really fun for me. This is like a trip, putting a trip on a sticky note on your calendar and then setting that intention, like we're gonna do a trip here. Um, but yeah, allowing yourself to dream, let the universe know it puts that energy out there, even journaling it on my new moons, what I'm calling in. It might not be something that I'm expecting can happen in the next month, but just letting the universe know, like, hey, I I would like this. I'd love for my energy to go here. I'm open to this, and that could be a huge start. Puts the energy out there. That's one of those things where you're like thinking about maybe I really want to start a yoga class, but I'm or join a yoga class, but I'm nervous. And you put that on your paper and you're like, I'd like to join a yoga class, and then it pops up on your phone, or you're driving and you see an ad for a yoga class, or you have a conversation with someone and they're like, I'm starting a yoga class. Like, those are the ways that the universe goes, hey, remember when you asked for that? Here it is, but it takes that step of really honoring what do I want? And when we allow ourselves to look at the months ahead or what our life is gonna look like, what are the non-negotiables, and then really honoring that other time, that's where we don't end up then scrolling or wasting our time, but really implementing even downtime. This is my self-care time. I don't know what I'm gonna do with it. Maybe I decide that day that I'm gonna go for a walk or I'm gonna sit in, have a nice hot bath or whatever it might be, but you're putting the intention and claiming that time to be used to create your life. And if you're feeling a little bit stuck, I'm just gonna share a couple ways or things that I'll lean into. One, if I'm feeling stuck and I'm not really sure, don't use this as a distraction. But I like to refresh my space, rearrange something. Um, I make sure it's not a distraction technique. It has to be fully intentional and planned and time managed. But where I might feel heavier ick, um, cleaning or clearing, it does. It shifts the energy. I would say seasonally, I shift something. And it's also where lots of times I lean into creativity. I might paint a wall or redecorate something. Um, it doesn't have to be big. Even clearing off your desk and doing a little smudge can be huge. Um, decluttering and purging. So those things that are taking up space, those piles of things you maybe haven't tended to or that to-do task that has been sitting right in front of your face, um, getting those things done, purging the piles of things that need to be purged, clearing just one little space can be a huge step in the right direction to start calling in and allowing yourself to get some clarity. Um, sitting with the stuff you haven't done, get, like I said, getting that done, paying the bill that you've been avoiding, doing the undone tasks, having a really honest chat with yourself about one or two things that you know will better support you. Asking yourself if you need help with that, maybe booking whatever wellness appointment might be supportive of that, or coaching or support, letting yourself have some fun. Really make sure you're doing that. Sometimes just like doing something fun can allow heaviness to fall away and you to really meet yourself with like, hey, this is what brings me joy. This is what I'm really calling in. Write it down. Like I said, super important. Put down the things that feel good, let the rest fall away, schedule it in. And I like to involve my family or a friend. Um, with my family, I think it's a good time to connect with my husband and my kids and be like, hey, this is what our month or our season's looking like. How does that feel to everybody? What's something important that you'd really like to do, whether it be on your own or together? Um, what are maybe some big events? What are some busy days? Where are we at with money? And then also allowing yourself to create some opportunities for bonding or trips or family suppers or whatever it might be. But it's also a great way for the kids to know what's ahead, what free time they have to create play or connect with friends. And I think it also just teaches them too how important it is to be open to what you're calling in and get excited mentally and physically and energetically preparing for what ahead we could be calling in. It is really awesome. I love this piece of coaching, but being able to get a friend or a partner in on it and holding each other accountable to like, hey, let's do a seasonal review. I lead these in my business online. Um, and I feel like we touch on these in our soul dives, but yeah, really reflecting, being honest, held space for each other just to make sure that you sit with yourself and reflect. I always love a good card pull, um, or asking for signs or guidance. Um, vision board can be really fun, doing a future self-meditation, finally, maybe creating the calendar. Maybe you're uh everything's in my head and I don't need to see it on paper, but you might find value in actually creating the calendar. And lastly, just allowing yourself to trust yourself and know that you can follow your heart, you can get out of your head, and you can literally dream up some new things that feel exciting, fresh, and good, and a new direction, even maybe in your life, or just realigning. Just make sure whatever you do that you are living. Remember, you can do this whenever you feel stuck, or if you get overwhelmed, or you just like hit that point where you're like, Okay, this isn't working. You catch yourself going through the motions, um, or you just are ready for a shift. It can be a good time to just get connected with a routine or a way that you can connect with yourself to do those check-ins, create some flow, some growth, some happiness, reflect on your life and really lean into your own power in wiping that slate clean, allowing yourself to call in new relationships, places, work, money, uh, whatever it might be, fun. And every fucking day counts. So wipe that slate clean. Be honest with yourself about what is feeling ick, what's heavy, what's being dreaded, and where you really want to be, what you want to be doing, and who you're surrounded with. If you are listening to this, a time of release, we are entering summer. So let this beautiful energy of light and sun and freedom really come over you. Allow yourself to carve out time for what matters, play with those new routines, do some research if you felt intrigued by the moon or the seasons, and definitely stay tuned as I'll dive into each of those in a future episode. But live, don't just exist, and make sure that you give yourself permission to wipe the slate clean. Starting today. As always, I want to thank you for listening in. Um, be sure to leave a review or a comment or share this podcast to help me connect with other people like you that would love to um listen in. I'm so grateful for our community, sending so much love. Um, remember in this moment to love yourself and your life so fiercely and trust that you will land softly until we meet again. Peace and love.