9. Why Mindset Work Matters More Than Systems

I recently did an episode of Cubicle to CEO breaking down how I've worked fewer hours and made more money over the last eight years. 

While I was prepping for it, my friend asked me: "But like, what do you actually do?" And that's when I realized... it's not really the systems. It's the mindset. It's the energetic alignment, the inner work, the woo stuff I usually keep to myself.

So this week I'm getting into all of it. The eldest immigrant daughter conditioning I'm still unlearning. The ego I had to release to start asking for referrals. The clients I've fired because working with them didn't feel right in my body. And the framework that's helped me reverse-engineer my way out of a scarcity mindset and into a wealthy one, even on the weeks I really, really don't feel like it.

This one's a little vulnerable. I'm not coming at you with "I've got it all figured out" energy — I'm still working through a lot of this in real time. But if even one piece of it resonates with you, take it and run.

In this episode, we talk about:
• Why mindset work often matters more than systems and strategy
• How to stop making decisions from fear, desperation, and lack
• Why asking for help, referrals, and opportunities is a skill worth developing
• The difference between attracting aligned clients and chasing the wrong opportunities
• How existing from a place of abundance changes the way you approach money, growth, and success
• A simple framework for shifting your thoughts, emotions, actions, and results
• Why your future success depends on the identity you're choosing to embody today
• Practical ways to build confidence, challenge limiting beliefs, and strengthen your mindset

My Cubicle to CEO episode with Ellen: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/339-systemizing-to-six-figures-increasing-average-earnings/id1470966370?i=1000767153258
My Quantum Wealth episode with Jillian: https://podcasts.apple.com/cr/podcast/what-actually-changes-when-you-do-the-inner-work/id1871569964?i=1000769960980

Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itsallmost/
Visit my website: https://www.itsallmost.com
Join The Conversion Club: https://itsallmost.com/the-conversion-club

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hello, hello, my beautiful yappers. Kieran here. Welcome back to the Conversation Club. We are talking about truly one of my favorite subjects today. We're talking mindset and why mindset work matters more than systems. Matters more than any system, any automation, anything that you can put in place to make your business more efficient. Mindset. Mindset is actually the actual work, the inner work that we need to be doing. So let's get into it. Let's dive in, yappers. Let's get to yapping. I recently, and you've heard me talk about this on this podcast before, I recently did an episode of Cubicle to CEO where I talk about systems. I talk about how I have reduced my hours worked each week over the last eight years, and how I have increased my revenue while working less over the last eight years. There are a lot of valuable things and pieces of information that I have in that episode, and that's really wonderful. But I focused on the system side. I focused on the business side and the things that I did to make my time more efficient, to make my hourly rate go up and number of hours work go down. And that's wonderful. Consistency and standardized systems, they are important. But honestly, I didn't really get a chance to talk about what I wanted to talk about, which is mindset and why that is such a huge part of why I work less and earn more. And honestly, I didn't realize most of this until I was prepping for the cubicle to CEO episode. And I was talking to a really wonderful, I've shouted her out on this podcast before, Kim. Love you. We were talking about the talking points that I was going to go over on Cubicle to CEO. And she was like, well, but like what actually do you do? And I realized I was like, oh my gosh, it's actually a lot more like energy, energetic alignment, mindset. It's actually a lot more of that woo stuff. And we're gonna do a whole separate episode on embracing woo in your business and being a little more woo-woo and embracing some of that, like what mainstream folks will think like, oh, that's not real. That won't work for me. I mean, I know that shit's real, it has worked for me. So again, as I always say on this podcast, or I've said at least once before on this podcast, is that if there are things that I say that don't resonate with you, don't take it. I totally understand. I will not take it personally. Take what resonates with you when you listen to this podcast, when you listen to me on other podcast interviews. I just want you to take what resonates with you, what you think you can implement and use it to your advantage and make it work for you. In terms of mindset, I think there's a lot to talk about, and we will get into all of it. But working with Gillian of Quantum Wealth Academy, working with Karina of True Adventure Collective and her program Summit Mentality, it really helped me realize that there is so much inner work, inner work here and inner work here, and inner work in our gut and our innate understanding of ourselves and honoring of that. I want to get into all of that today because truly, systems only really got me so far, and honoring my own energy and my identity was actually where my time efficiency flourished. It's where I was able to reduce my hours, it's where I was able to, like, yes, the systems and the standardization, like all of that is important and it's great, and that's part of the foundation. But unless you are willing to do the inner work to know why is it that I do this the way that I do it? Why is it that I feel this way about XYZ? That's where the real efficiency, that's where something gets unlocked there. And I want to talk about how we can unlock that. Does that sound good? Does that sound good, Yapers? Is that what we want to talk about? To preface this, I do want to talk a little bit about my old mindset. I know y'all are gonna be so fucking sick of me saying this. You're like, oh, are you? Are you an eldest immigrant daughter? You haven't mentioned it, like, definitely haven't mentioned it a million times on this podcast. But it's true. I mean, I have had this immigrant mentality of what I was taught, what I was taught in my culture and by my family is that you have to work hard for more money. You have to work more and you have to work hard for more money. And honestly, that's not true. That's not true at all. It's not the reality. There's more than enough money in this world. Whether you believe that or not, currently, the truth of the matter is there is more than enough money in this world to go around. Right now, right this second, that you're listening, that I'm recording this and that you are listening to this, millions, trillions of dollars are being exchanged hands by powerful, powerful white men, right? So why can't we claim some more of that? Why can't we claim some more of that as people of color, as women, as minorities? We have the ability to claim that and we should and we will, and we don't have to work hard for more money. That's just not true. That's really, really not true. And I also, old mindset-wise, thought that there's only really one way to be successful, or maybe not just one, but like there's only a handful of ways to be successful, and the way that these other people that I see online have found success is the way that I have to find success, which also drum roll, please, is not true. You can define success however you want to define it. There are so many ways to be successful. There are still jobs that I hear about that I'm like, I didn't even know that was an option. I didn't even know you could do that to make money. I would, I mean, sometimes, you know, when I when I feel like burning my business down, which for the last few weeks I have been feeling that way. You know, there are days that I'm like, let me just do that instead. Fuck this shit. Fuck this shit. But anyway, I digress. That's kind of more the old mindset, right? That there's only one way to be successful. You gotta work harder, you gotta work more, you gotta work longer hours, you just have to like grind and grind and do more to get more. And that's just that's just not true. So I'm gonna talk about today a little bit of some of the ways that I have shifted my own mindset, shifted how I see things in business and in life. And hopefully, you can learn some of the things that I wish I had known. This is gonna be another, almost a follow-up to like what I wish I had learned before I started my business, and also just a follow-up to that cubicle to CEO episode. I really loved it. I loved it so much, and I think there's so much to be gained from what I shared in that episode. But here are all the things that I really wish that I had been able to articulate, and now I have the wherewithal and the capacity to articulate it. So let's get into it. For me and my business, the first thing I want to talk about is my network, relationship building within my network. I have been working on mostly word of mouth referrals since the beginning, basically. I mean, look, that's a whole other episode is that I need to work on my lead generation a little bit better and my lead nurturing. But in terms of my network, the things that I kind of had to shift in relationship building with the people in my community, relationship building with the people in my network is asking for referrals and asking for help. We've talked about this before. Again, eldest immigrant daughter, da-da-da-da-da. Is that asking for help is okay. That was the first shift that scared me. That, like, really, I was like, I don't know, I don't want to be doing it. But going and asking the people in your network, in my network, that would help, right, lead to potential client referrals and having that reciprocal relationship where I'm sharing and amplifying and referring people and clients to them as well. I'm not just asking and receiving, I'm also giving, right? But at the end of the day, just asking, just asking and starting that exchange of energy, starting that exchange of how can I help you? How can you help me? That was something that I for a really, really long time resisted because I needed to release my ego. My ego was so caught up in my identity. I was so afraid to ask for referrals and ask for help because I was afraid that people would think that like I'm desperate or like I'm not good at making money. I'm not good at finding my own clients. I'm not good at running my business. I was like coming up with all these false narratives about what it meant to ask people for referrals, what it meant to ask people for help, what it meant to be doing that kind of lead generation, to be doing that kind of like client sales. It was just my ego was like all wrapped up in it. And I told myself that if I asked people for help, I asked them for referrals, that they would think that I was desperate and that I couldn't make money and that I wasn't good at my job and blah blah blah blah. And the thing is, is sure, some people may be thinking that, and that's okay, right? But when you don't ask, the answer is automatically no. I'm sure many of you have heard this before is that when you don't ask, the answer is automatically no. And so why not ask? Why not release some of that ego? Why not release some of that, like I'm holier than thou, and I must present, like I know exactly what I'm doing at every second of every day. And I know social media has like totally contributed to that, like psychosis that we have. But these days, I just want to stay on people's radars, right? I want them to know, like, I know there are plenty of people in my orbit who are like, I don't really even know what you do. We have friends where we're like, I've been friends with you for 10 years. I have no idea what you do at work. So I'm kind of trying to distance myself from that reality and that identity. I'm trying to ask. I'm trying to stay on people's radars. I'm trying to talk to them about my services and my offerings so that if they come across an opportunity that would be great for me, they can send it my way because they remember what my services are. They know what I do, and that I'm top of mind for them because I've been in their inbox, right? The closed mouth doesn't get fed. And so open your fucking mouths. Like let's just open our mouths and ask. Just ask. Ask someone in your network to connect you with someone. Ask someone in your network to be open to sharing a post on LinkedIn or sharing your email with someone or whatever it is, and saying, like, hey, here's what I do, and here is what I can do for you, right? What I can do for your network. It is about that like give and take, that relationship building, that reciprocity. But truly, like, if you like me for a very long time, continue to be stuck on these narratives of what will people think and will they judge me for this? Well, they might. They might, and that's okay. That is not up to you. What is up to you is what you're in control of, which is essentially just ask, just asking and being open to receiving. I also, for a really long time, didn't in my client offboarding process when we end our work together, whether that's a project or a retainer or a one-on-one, I was resistant to asking for testimonials and referrals to other clients because I was like, what if they didn't have the best time with me? I don't want to find that out. I don't want to know. I don't want to know that they like didn't really think what we did together was worth their money or, you know, whatever. Like, there was that fear. And there was also the fear of asking my former clients for referrals as well, because I was like, well, what if they think that I don't want to work with them and I would rather work with other people and that they're not my priority, and blah blah blah. It was like, are you noticing a are you noticing a pattern here? It's a lot of like this me coming up with all these what if scenarios that aren't rooted in truth and aren't actually true. It's just me telling all this shit to myself. That hopefully continues to be a mindset shift for me is moving away from this like presumption of what people are thinking and just releasing that, releasing my own ego, letting the chips fall where they may, and trusting in myself and in the universe, whatever you want to call it, creator, god, whatever entity you want to label it as, saying and speaking to them and saying, like, look, I trust you to give me what I need when I need it, and it's going to be delivered on time. And what is meant for me is mine. And that, ooh, that's a hard one. It's a hard one. I know, I get it, I get it. I've been doing this shit for years for a long, long time. And I am just at the like the tippy top. I guarantee you, I will look back on this episode. Let's say we're on episode 300 or episode 500, and I'll come back and look at this episode nine and be like, oh, wasn't she sweet? Wasn't she sweet? She had all the foundational stuff, but we have quantum left from there, and that is the reality that I am trying to manifest, that I'm trying to move into. So, in terms of the things that I wish I had said on the cubicle to CEO episode, this is a big one, is just like releasing the ego and being able to ask for help. Now, the next thing is I think one of my favorite things to not only tap into for myself, but to talk to other people, especially other women, femmes, and non-binary business owners about when it comes to how you can really level up, not just yourself but your business, is energetic alignment and really tuning in to the physicality of your body and tuning into how it feels, how it feels in that moment and what it is presenting to you as evidence of whether or not you should pursue something or not. In a client-facing capacity, for example, if a client does not energetically align with me, for example, if they turn out to have a communication style or a work style that clashes with mine, I will pretty quickly end that contract because honestly, I don't have time to manage a difficult to work with client. I don't have time to manage a client that's gonna scope creep me. I don't have time or energy to haggle over pricing and to be just like, ah, just so thinking small and feeling small and being small. If any client makes me feel that way, boom, you get the boot. I wish I could like kick my kick my leg up so y'all could see Lega. You get the boot. You're out of here. Look, I get it. In a place of desperation, it's very hard to do this, right? It's very hard to say, you know what? You need me more than I need you. I'm out. And for that reason, I'm out. When you're abundant, when you're like, oh, I have a lot of clients, I have a lot of revenue coming in, life is looking up for me. Obviously, this decision is a lot easier to make, right? And so it really is about those moments of desperation, those moments of scarcity that test you, that say, are you gonna put up with this shit? Are you gonna allow this client to treat you this way? Are you gonna allow this kind of energetic exchange to happen? Or are you gonna value your piece over the dollars? Are you gonna realize that time is just as valuable as money, if not more, if not more valuable than money? Are you gonna realize that the mental space that it takes to manage these fucking annoying ass clients? And you know, I know you all have had them. I know you all have had them. I'm not gonna name all the ones that I've dealt with, but I know you've got a little list in your head of those kinds of clients, those kinds of people who are literally going to make you say, like, I'm losing my mind, I hate working with this client. Are you going to realize that that mental space is draining? That space they take up in your day, in your time, in your energy, that's taxing. That is a lot more taxing than losing out. I would rather personally lose out on that money than fucking have to deal with a client like that. And some people are like, look, I need the money. I need the money, and I get it. I get it. There have been many a time I'm currently actually kind of going through that. So I'm saying I'm not even totally perfectly good at this. I'm still working on being good at this too. Is that I took a client that I was like, now looking back on it, I kind of regret taking because my body is resisting to wanting to complete some of those deliverables and realizing that now I'm just like, oh, I shouldn't have, I shouldn't have made a decision from that place of desperation. I should have said something better is gonna come in, something more aligned, and I don't need to be spending my time doing this. But if you're still insistent on trying to make it work, what I will recommend, and I'm sure most of you have heard this before, is adding a little bit of an asshole tax. Increasing your rate, increasing the amount that you're gonna charge us. So let's say for a regular service, you would charge like what $2,000 or whatever it is. Let's say $2,000. For an annoying client, a client that I know I'm gonna be frustrated by working with, I'm probably, if I'm not just immediately gonna reject them, I'm probably going to increase that by like three, four, maybe five times. So I'm gonna charge six thousand for something that normally I would charge two thousand for because hopefully they will say no. And if they say yes, I'm getting three times the rate that I was originally gonna get. So I guess it does make my time a little more worth it, right? So that's just a little tactic, a little tidbit for you if you haven't thought of it yet. I'm sure many of you have. But on a client-facing perspective, that's where I want to be operating from. That's where I wanna be aligning from energetically. On a personal and more of a daily capacity, I will at the beginning of every week plan out my week and say, okay, I'm gonna do these things for my clients. Let's say I have like 30 tasks on my list. I on average will probably only get like half of that done at most. Maybe not half, like two-thirds, two-thirds of that done at most. Because every day when I wake up, and not just when I wake up, but especially when I like think about sitting down and doing work, I honor my energy. And if my energy is low, I'm gonna move that to a different day. I'm gonna move that to a day when the work is more in a flow state and that I'm not forcing myself and trying to push through. Cause as women, as we do, we're taught to push through. We're taught to just do it and just get it done and fuck all with all the shit that we're dealing with. Just do it, just crank it out. And I think we, as women and just societally in general, if we could all just honor our own energies a little bit more and say, like, hey, I'm real low energy today. Like, I need a day off. I need a day where I'm just resting and I'm recharging, and I don't think we do that enough. And I really wish that we all did that a little bit more. So on a personal level and just on a daily basis, I really say today, for example, I was like, oh, I got up, I did a podcast interview. I was like, you know what? I've got some energy to record my own podcast episode, and so that's why we're here. I have some tasks that I've scheduled. I'm gonna go to the beach today with my friends. I'm gonna take some time to rest and regenerate. But yeah, I have some stuff that I'm like telling myself that I should do at the end of the day, but there's a good part of me that I could tell. I'm like, mmm, I don't know. I think I'm gonna come back from the gym and be like, I don't want to do any of that. Not the gym, the beach. So again, just sitting down and saying, like, what is it? Is my body feeling resistance? Is my body feeling tension? Or is my body opening and expansive and ready and excited and all of that, like really tuning in to yourself and your energetic reality? That's gonna be pretty important, pretty important foundational things to start with when it comes to mindset. But let's get into the like the mindset, the nitty gritty, the nitty gritty of the mindset, and what it takes. And again, I will preface this by saying one more time your girl is working on all these things too. So don't think that I'm coming at you with a Like, I've got it all figured out, and here's how to do it, here's how I've done it. No, that's that's not where I'm coming from. I'm very coming from a place of here's what I've learned, and like if any of this helps you, great, great. And if it doesn't, I'm sorry. Maybe tune into the next episode. Maybe that'll that'll be more helpful for you. But let's break down scarcity and abundance. What episode did I talk about this in? I can't really remember. It was one of the previous episodes. So if you go listen, there's only like what eight other episodes for you to listen to so far. But I talk about the difference between what scarcity and abundance is, right? Abundance is more of that, there's more than enough for everyone. If I lose a client, another one will come. What is meant for me is mine. I know that anything that the universe is clearing for me is just making room for better things to come in, right? It's that mindset of I will always be taken care of, I will always be protected, I will always be served. Now, scarcity, other end of that spectrum. It's the oh, like I have to keep this client and I have to be at this rate because that's what they agreed upon, and I really need the money, and I just what if, what if I lose them? And if I lose them, then I'll just lose everything, and then all my money will go away, and then I won't be able to do this, and I'll just be alone. I won't have the revenue that I want. It's just this energy of like, there's not enough for everyone. There's not enough for me. What am I gonna do? I can't get rid of this relationship because what if I never get another one? I can't get rid of this client because what if I never get another one? I can't set a boundary with my friend because what if they don't want to be my friend? And then what if no one wants to be my friend? And then what if da-da-da-da-da-da? So that is the scarcity side. And in terms of scarcity versus abundance, this is a big one. This is a big part of mindset. This is probably the main aspect of mindset that I think a lot of us need to really work through. And I haven't, again, entirely gotten rid of my scarcity mindset, but it is a lot quieter than when I started this business, than when I started working on some of this mindset stuff. Like for me, business-wise, I know and I trust that clients will come in when I need it. That has almost always been true for me, is that one client goes away and then another bigger one comes in. And whenever I need money, I've said, I need money. And the universe is like, hurt, here you go. Here you go, here's your money. And so I, again, not totally perfect at this still. There's still scarcity in there, but I know and I trust that I don't need to stay with toxic clients. I don't need to stay with people who don't pay well, who are sucking a lot of my time and a lot of my energy from things that could be otherwise spent on finding aligned clients, finding people that trust me to do my job, finding people that trust me to deliver value. I know this one is super, super hard to do. It is so, so hard to do. It's a lifetime journey. It's not something that you're gonna figure out in a month, it's not something that you're gonna figure out overnight. But this is what we're striving towards, right? We're striving towards trusting ourselves. We're striving towards trusting in the universe and that knowing that what is yours will find you. It's meant for you and it will be yours at the right time. And I know that some of you are gonna listen to this and be like, okay, okay, if you say so. But honestly, when you do that mindset work and when you realize and learn to trust in yourself and trust in whatever entity is puppeteering our world and our reality, it will give you what you need when you need it. And that is it's an abundance mindset. And I know it's hard. There's a lot, I'm sure many of you listening, there's a lot of resistance coming up when I say that. But I've got the proof and we're gonna get into all of that right now. In terms of mindset and clients, I think there's this huge difference between alignment and forcing and pursuing and all of that. I've talked about this a little bit before, but just that difference between that masculine energy and that feminine energy, right? The masculine energy being like, let's push, let's grind, let's organize, let's do, let's pitch, let's connect. And alignment in that feminine energy being a little bit more like, let me tune into myself, let me tune into what I need, let me tune into what my body is telling me, let me nurture these relationships, let me foster more connection. There's a balance, there's a little bit of both. I'm not saying it's only feminine energy that we're trying to use and not saying it's only masculine energy. There's gotta be a yin and a yang. There's gotta be a little bit of both. So for me, in terms of like clients and alignment versus forcing, every single time I have tried to chase a client, it has always turned out to be a short contract. It has always turned out to be some kind of shit going on internally in the business, whether that's how they operate, not aligning with how I operate, or just like internally, the business just being a mess, an organizational mess, lack of clear roles, bad leadership, you know, whatever it is. I pursued them because on the external facing, the front customer facing side on social media and whatever, this business looked really successful. But every, every single time, and I want to say this has happened to me at least four to five times, probably more, but at least four to five times this has happened. And I just have regretted it. And using strong positioning and using good marketing to find these clients rather than trying to make a relationship or a client situation setup situationship. Are there things such as client situationships? I don't know. But anyway, trying to make sort of this client exchange work that wouldn't otherwise. And I do think I know some people are gonna say, wait, so like is following up chasing? Is that the same thing? No, no. Following up is quite literally like, let's just follow up. I just wanna get back to the top of your inbox. Chasing, in my definition of the word, is when, and this is what I've done in those situations, is pursuing that client for months and months and if not years, long after you should have let them go. And trying to like, oh, I really want to work with you, I really wanna, and just like for months and months following up and trying to make it work and creating almost a custom package that you would never create for anybody else, but you're like, I just want a contract with you, that's that kind of energy. But at the end of the day, we know this, we know this from not just business, but in life. It's like if he wanted to, he would. I truly believe that applies here. If he wanted to, he would. If that client really did want you, you don't need to be chasing, you don't need to be pursuing them. You have to say who you are, say what you do, say how you can help people, and let them come to you. Let them come to you. This is that kind of feminine energy and business of like getting real intuitive and saying, okay, who am I? What do I want? And standing really, really tall and strong and powerful in that truth, and allowing whoever resonates with it to come to you, to align with you, right? Feminine energy in business when we're talking about that, and I'm sure we can do another whole episode on this, is tapping into that intuition, tapping into nurturing, tapping into the creative side, the empathetic side, being flexible, being receptive, being fluid, being vulnerable. These are all things that we can use a little bit more of in business, can use a little bit more of with this balance of like deal maker, sales, get it done. I want to tap into my feminine energy a little bit more in business, and I really hope that all of you do too. Truly, in terms of mindset, one of the best pieces of advice I've ever gotten is to detach from the outcome a little bit more. A lot easier said than done, truly. I know this because I am still working on this very much so. But being just as excited about getting a no as you are about getting a yes, I know it's hard, it's hard to do. But realizing that each no is gonna get you closer to a yes. This happened a while ago, but does everybody remember the like thousand rejections girl? The girl who was like, I'm out to get a thousand noes. Because that is not only gonna teach me that sometimes just because you ask, you may get a yes. Just because you put yourself in a situation that you were like, I'm ready to get a no. Sometimes you will get a yes. And that's kind of what we're trying to build is that we're trying to build this, just like I've said in terms of email marketing, the unsubscribes are a good thing. The people who get off your list are making room for better people to come on your list. And that's what we're talking about here is that the clients that say no, the clients that don't align, they are basically just helping pave the way and get you closer to the clients that do align, the clients that will say yes, the clients that will pay you on time, that will respect your expertise, that will understand your value, right? That's what we're getting towards. In terms of mindset and wealth mindset, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, that is a big one. And I will be sure I'm not bringing guests on just yet because I just trying to build a relationship with y'all first. Just us, just me and me and all of you. But eventually down the line, when I bring some guests on, which we will, don't worry. I'll definitely bring Jillian on to talk a little bit more about that wealth mindset and getting rid of some of these limiting beliefs that we have. These beliefs that, to be fair, were taught to us in childhood and we were conditioned to believe. And so that is no fault of your own. Truly, no, no fault of your own. But I think the thing to think about from here is are we gonna keep holding on to these limiting beliefs? Are we gonna hold on and allow ourselves to like think in this way? No, no. In terms of money mindset, there's so many things to work on. Our limiting beliefs, what we think we're worth, what we allow ourselves to receive, that ego, that inner critic that's keeping us safe. It's keeping us safe. I get it. I get it. It's that ego, the voice that tells you, don't ask for help, don't ask for help, don't ask people for referrals, what they're gonna think that you can't run a business. They're really just trying to keep you safe. They're just trying to protect you and to protect you from rejection and protect you from harm and whatever it is. But at the end of the day, it's also holding you back, right? It's not allowing you to receive, it's not allowing you to embody and be expansive in this wealthy self, in this wealthy mindset. And so when you can accept these things, when you can accept these realities for yourself, when you can accept that you are enough and that you are worth every single thing you ask for, and you are worth more than you even realize. When you accept that mentally, mindset-wise, your body can accept it as safe as well, right? And some of the ways that I really love to do that is to find that evidence. Show the ego, show my inner critic that I'm capable of receiving more. Write down all the examples of when a client has paid you what you're worth, when a client has made you feel like your expertise is valuable, when you've received big chunks of money, not just in business, but in life as well. Put all those things in a list, in a Google Doc, on your notes app, in a journal, whatever it is. Find that evidence of all of those times that you have delivered, that you have received, that you have broken through those limiting money beliefs that you have, and refer back to them and go back to them and say, hey, look, I know who I am and I know what I'm worth. And everything I ask for is meant for me and it's mine. Like, oh when we get to that level, watch out, watch out, world, because that's where the magic happens, right? I learned this technique in particular from Karina Baldwin. I actually learned it through Kristen Grace first, my dance teacher, because she learned it through Karina as well, is the tier, the T-E-A-R, or as Karina calls it, the performance coaching model, which is essentially we are so, so caught up in I want this result. I want this result, I want to get here, I want this to be my reality. But we don't realize that there are a lot of things that we think and we feel and we do that lead to that result, right? Because I think a lot of the time we're like, let's just do do do, and then sorry. Whenever I hear the word doo-doo, I have a little moment. I apologize. But when we are like, it's only action that will get me to this result. No, no, no, no, that is not the reality. Our actions are rooted in our emotions, and our emotions are rooted in our thoughts, right? And so, working through that, I mean, I highly recommend going and working with Karina, she will do a fantastic job of breaking this down for you. But I'm gonna do a little bit of a quick breakdown because we don't have so much time on this podcast. But essentially, T-E-A-R. What thought is gonna lead to this next emotion? Like when I think I am not good enough, I'm not good enough to be doing this, I am going to feel disappointed. I'm gonna feel upset. I'm gonna feel a lack of confidence, right? And when I feel that, my action is going to be well, I'm just gonna procrastinate. I might as well not even put in the effort. I'm gonna half-ass it. And when I half ass it, what is the result? The result is gonna show me that my work isn't good. I'm not gonna deliver some of the best stuff. But if we reverse that and we say, okay, look, I want to make a million dollars. Great, let's start there. That's the result we're going for. What kind of action do I need to take to get that result? I need to do more client lead generation. I need to get on more sales calls. I need to do more marketing and nurturing, email marketing. Okay, so those are the actions that I'm gonna take. Now, what emotion do I need to be able to take that action? I need confidence, I need inspiration, I need excitement, I need passion, whatever it is, those are the emotions I'm tapping into. So, in order to feel confident, in order to feel excited, in order to feel passionate, what is that thought that I need to put in my head that I need to ingrain in my brain? What do I need to think? And for me, that could be let's say, I'm the fucking baddest bitch out there. Or something simpler, like, I've always figured it out. I have always figured it out, I've always delivered for my clients. That thought is gonna get me into the emotion of confidence, into the emotion of excitement, into the emotion of inspiration, into the emotion, all of the things I want to feel to be able to take the action of getting out there, getting on those sales calls, nurturing those leads, getting clients. And that action is gonna lead me to a million dollars, right? And so that's kind of the breakdown of we want to just take the results and sort of reverse engineer to the thought that we need to think to get us to the emotion, to get us to the action, to get us to the result. Okay. And that's something that I oh love, love this technique, love this tool, this strategy, because it is so great to have somewhere to start rather than just being like, why am I not getting to this result? Because at the end of the day, we are not going back and understanding what's going on in our brains and what narrative we are telling ourselves. I really like to use this in situations where I don't know exactly what the end result is gonna be, which is a lot of situations, obviously. So I will do a best case scenario tier. I will do a worst case scenario. So, like best case, here's what happens. Worst case, here's what happens. Most likely case, here is what happens. And usually it's probably closest to most likely than anything else. And what I realize is that actually, worst case wasn't as bad as I thought it was gonna be, and that I can survive it, and then I can get myself to a place that I feel good about, even with a worst case scenario. And sometimes it really is about finding that neutral thought because sometimes you're like, I just I can't for whatever reason come up with like a positive thought for this. So starting with a neutral thought, starting with a neutral thought is totally an okay thing to do. Because we just gotta get away from the negative sometimes. We just gotta move away from the negative. And sometimes we can't get all the way to the positive. We just gotta get to neutral first, and that is perfectly okay. In terms of mindset work that I've done and my self-identity, a transformative moment for me was realizing that every single challenge that I've ever faced in my life, I've always figured it out. I mean, some took me longer than others to figure out, but at the end of the day, we have always figured it out, right? And that I believe in myself, I trust in my abilities, I know that I can do this. And even on the days where, like for me, the last few weeks, where I've been like, I don't know if I could do this. I don't know. I have so much doubt in my abilities and what I think I could do and what I can deliver on, and da-da-da-da-da. Going back, going back to that evidence list, going to my friends, going to people and saying, like, hey, I need a little bit of a boost and getting that. That is so, so important in terms of helping build this like confident self-identity, helping build this identity of your future wealthy self, this millionaire mindset. That's kind of what we're trying to get towards, right? I am really working on this future wealthy self. Who is she? What does she do? How does she make decisions? What does her life look like? How does she make decisions? How does she embody her wealthiest self, her best self? And that's kind of the place that we're trying to work towards in terms of our mindset work. The first thing, which I'm still not very good at, I think this is the thing I'm the worst at of all the things I'm talking about in this episode, is energetic frequency, vibrating higher, right? When we get on a higher level of vibration, of energetic frequency, we allow for higher quality things to come into our lives to receive them, right? Now, why am I still working on this? Because your girl, and I've said this before, and I'll say this again. I've said this to my therapist in particular, is that I like being a hater. I like being an asshole sometimes. That's something I'm working on. I'm working on being less of a hater, being less of a dick. Because if I want to call in these bigger, better things, I need to shed that identity, that old reality. See, do you see? I'm like, I'm still resistant to some of these things. But an example of this recently, I was talking to my friend, and she was saying that she felt like her team was a little lower quality. She could have a better team. She could have a better team that was getting things done on time, getting things done better, getting things done in a more efficient way. And she was like, I just want to get rid of them. But I can't until I get more clients, until I get more revenue. Like, I just have to hustle more and be uncomfortable with this team for a little while longer in order to be able to get rid of them and get a better team in. And my immediate thought was well, why can't you just get this higher quality team now? It's a risk. It's a risk. It's scary. They're probably gonna cost. More, it's gonna be a little bit more work to incorporate them into your current business structure. But like, what would it actually take? What would it actually take to just get the higher quality team, right? And I asked her, and she was like, Well, it would cost this much more, and that's not totally unfeasible. Like, I could do that. I just wish that maybe I had a little more revenue before I jumped in and took this risk and did it this way. But I'm like, I'm sitting here, like, if you know this lower quality team is not gonna get you where you need to go, is not gonna get you the kind of higher quality clients and the higher paying clients that you're looking for. Why not just scrap them, bring in the higher quality team, and that is going to project you into getting those higher quality clients, getting those people who want to work with a team of amazing designers, of amazing copywriters, of amazing, et cetera, et cetera. Why don't we just do that now so that we can make room for better clients instead of continuing to operate in this like four-figure, five-figure identity, maybe even six-figure identity of like, I'm just gonna work a little harder. I'm just gonna work a little harder, I'm gonna be satisfied, I guess, with what I have now, and just hope, just hope that more money comes in and work a little harder to try to get more money to come in. No, no, no, no, no. If you hold on to five-figure decisions and structure, that means you will only be calling in five-figure revenue, right? Or six-figure revenue. If we're trying to be millionaires, we're trying to get seven figures, eight figures, we cannot be making decisions as a five-figure business owner. Am I making sense? Am I making sense right now? For example, for me, I had a big client that paused our contract in April. It scared me, it freaked me the fuck out. I was like, oh, but instead of fully panicking, like it freaked me out. And I was like, oh, let me be scared for a little bit. Let me feel the emotions that I need to feel. But I realized that actually, you know what? The universe knew. The universe knew that I needed to get rid of this big client in order to call a better one in, in order to call someone in that was gonna pay me on time, that was gonna respect my time and my energy and my work and the value that I was delivering. I needed to get rid of them to make room for a better client, for giving me more time, more space to work on the things that I wanted to work on in my business. That is a millionaire's mindset. That is not a five-figure mindset. And I'm not saying like, oh my God, look at me, I'm in a millionaire mindset. I'm trying to show you that like it's not easy, it's scary. It's scary and it will be uncomfortable when you first start doing it, but push through that. Push through that fear. And again, I know I just said like, don't push, don't push. That's so masculine. And in some ways, we don't need to push, but like in other aspects, I think we need to let our innate knowing that this future wealthy self is coming and that we can literally just be her. Do you know what I mean? Like we could just make decisions as her. And the more we make decisions as her, the more we are just gonna be her. We don't need to wait for all the conditions to be perfect. The conditions will never be perfect, but you can choose to step into that now, to be that person now, to make that decision as her, not as this old self, this old self that's scared, this old self that is holding on to low-ticket clients, that's holding on to desperation. We can step into, I know good things are coming for me. I know more is gonna be mine, and making a decision from that place. That's really what we're trying to do here. And recently I also had another situation actually with Cubicle to CEO with Ellen. She essentially is hosting this like very valuable sponsorship conversation where she's gonna answer all of our questions about how to get sponsorships the way that she has, because she's gotten like over $700,000 in sponsorship money. I had a really big scarcity moment because I had just lost that client and I was like, oh, like, I don't know if I want to invest $600 in that. It's not even a priority for me right now. I'm not really getting sponsorships, but I know down the line that I'm gonna want sponsorships, that I'm going to want to have access to this information. And so I was like, you know what? This is a scarcity moment for me, not wanting to invest in this. I'm vibrating on five-figure founder energy, not on six-figure or seven-figure or eight-figure founder energy. I'm vibrating on five-figure energy, saying that, oh, I'm scared to invest in this. Like, I'm scared, even though I know it's gonna be so valuable for me. So I said, I said, you know what? Fuck that. Fuck that scarcity mindset. I told myself I was like, I'm gonna invest in it now. I'm not even gonna put it on a payment plan because that is also a five-figure energy identity. And I'm not knocking people again. In this episode, I'm not trying to say that you're not good enough if you're still vibrating on this level. I'm not saying that because I have vibrated on that level for a long time. And in some instances, like with this situation, I am still vibrating on that level sometimes. That's my first instinct is to go there and to be scared and to be like, oh, what if uh uh. But taking a step back, slowing down and realizing, oh, there's more. There is more for me out there. That's the magic. That's what we're trying to work towards. Okay. I really encourage you to listen to the episode that I did with Gillian on Quantum Wealth. That's a really wonderful episode and a really wonderful podcast. I will also link Quantum Wealth in the show notes below because I think if you're trying to work through a lot of money mindset, that podcast is a very good one. It's a free way to learn from Jillian. She is so awesome. She has been a big part of this journey for me. So listen to that episode for a little bit more of like how my work with Gillian in Quantum Wealth Academy has transformed my work here with my mindset, with my business. And look, I get it. I get it. Everyone has their own challenges. We all have our own beliefs, our own doubts. And I encourage you, I encourage you to start digging into your beliefs. What do you believe about yourself? What do you doubt about yourself? Where are those beliefs and doubts rooted in your childhood, in your old trauma, in your current situation? And again, some of you might be like, you want me to do inner child work right now and shadow work? Like, I don't want to be doing any of that. But that's the hard shit. That's the hard shit that we need to be doing to level up our mindset, to level up our mentality. Going out there, finding coaches who will support you. Jillian mentor of Quantum Wealth Academy, Karina Baldwin of True Adventure Collective. These are all amazing people. Find someone that's gonna resonate with you that you're like, oh, you know what? I do want to change my mindset. I do want to shift my performance mindset or my wealth mindset or what I believe around what I'm capable of receiving and what I'm capable of doing. Go out there and find coaches that will support you. Another thing is just finding that evidence by just doing it, building your confidence, getting out there and putting in those reps, putting in those reps of I'm scared and I'm gonna do it scared. I'm gonna do it anyway, right? I'm gonna learn, I'm gonna implement, and I'm actually gonna put the work in to transform and to level up my mindset. And at the end of the day, I know y'all are gonna be so sick of me being like, I've said this before and I'll say it again, but I will. Is that you should be using the tools that resonate with you, that make the most sense for you. There are gonna be things in this episode on this podcast that I'm like, this has worked for me. Let me share it with you. That you're gonna listen and you're gonna be like, no, I'm not doing that. Tracking shit, tracking time, doing all that. I'm not doing that. And that's okay. And I think social media has really exacerbated this, is like, oh, it's work for me. Follow me for more tips. And it's like, not everything works for everyone. Like for me, for example, I don't like Notion, I don't like any of those like Trello, any of those, uh, just project management platforms freak me out. And like, I feel this tension and this resistance every time because I have like corporate trauma from using them. But I do use the tools that work for me. I love a pen to paper situation. I love a notes app. I love tracking things on a sheet. Just doing what resonates with you and what you know will work for you, what you know makes sense for you. I have so many coaches who've given me this like wonderfully intricate and very thorough toolkits. And there was a long time where I really thought that I needed to like use all the tools all the time in order to be the most successful. That shit burnt me out. So you don't need to try to do it all all the time. Take what you need and leave what you can't carry for now. Because maybe down the line you're like, you know what? Actually, I do have the energy to carry that now. Do that, but just honor your energy, honor where you are, meet yourself where you are. They say that all the time. They're like, we just have to meet people where they are. And that's true for clients, that's true for your audience, that's true for relationships, but it's also true for ourselves that we need to do what works for us and meet ourselves where we are and not try to force ourselves to be someone else, meet ourselves where we are, and at the same time, encourage ourselves to try to make decisions from that future self, from that future wealthy identity that makes decisions that maybe our current self is a little scared to make. And that's okay too. I know it's so much easier to say all of these things than to do it, but I really hope, I really want each and every one of you to commit to yourselves, commit to this new timeline, this new reality that you can build for yourselves when you work on your mindset, when you work on all these things. I know this is a long episode. I hope it's helpful. I hope it's jam-packed with some things that you can go and try and find or implement or learn a little bit more about. Yeah, I know I'm probably gonna do another follow-up to this because I feel like I have so much more that I want to say about mindset and about mindset work. But it's been a long one, and so I will leave you with this. I believe in you. If you don't believe in yourself, I believe in you, and I trust that you know what you need to do the shit that you want to do, to call in everything that you want to call in in your life. So, on that note, thank you so much, Yappers. You are all the best, and I hope that we can all continue to level up our mindsets, strengthen our mentalities, and to get out there and to get that fucking bag, to get the money, to get the things that we know are meant for us. So thank you so much, Yappers. It has been another wonderful episode of the Conversation Club, and I will see you next week. Ciao ciao. If this episode gave you something to think about, take it and do something with it. If you want more of this or you just want to see what my life actually looks like, come follow me on Instagram at it's almost with two L's. Be sure to link it in the show notes. You can also follow me at Almost Consulting for some juicier, spicier takes. And if you're serious about getting your emails to convert, you can check out the Conversion Club, our monthly email marketing membership for founders who are ready to turn email into their most profitable and sustainable sales channel with expert guidance, plug and play tools, and strategy you'll actually use. Check it out. That's a link in the show notes. I'll see you in the next episode, yappers.