007 - My Opinions on Bonnie Blue's Golden Baby Shower

My opinions on Bonnie Blue's Golden Baby Shower

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:04

More than Fridays. Hi everybody, welcome to More Than Fridays. Another episode and a bit of a catch-up. I have so much to tell you, so much to catch up on. It's going to be a great episode. Um, so we are gonna kick off with my gripe with A Fever again. So I might look a bit different. I don't have a full face of makeup on. That's fine because some of you are gonna be listening to this on either Spotify or Apple. We've managed to sort that out now. But some of you might be watching this on YouTube, um, or some of you might be having it on in the corner while you listen to me. Who knows? Anyway, this week has been mental, so I've been rushing around everywhere, lots of makeup, lots of hair, lots of events, lots of filming, lots of this, that, and the other. And I hadn't really felt like I'd suffered from hay fever. I hadn't really I'd had tickly ears this time because it always manifests in a weird way. I either get throat or I get watery eyes, and this time, and I I do take antihistamines this time in the evenings I'd get tickly ears, but by Thursday I came home and my eyes had puffed, had puffed out. So I'd wake up and I'd have these massive bags and puff, and so I've I've had some kind of allergy, and I think it's connected to hay fever. So, anyway, if you're wondering why I I look a bit different, that's why I don't have my full face of makeup on, but nonetheless, I still wanted to come on here and share. So I've got a lot to share. So we'll kick off with last week. Now, Mighty Hoopla was on and it looked so amazing. And the funniest thing was I was actually meant to go very last minute and be on one of the stages, be brought on for a particular song. Um, but it sadly fell through. Now, this is something that some of you might be able to relate to. Now, I'm not as spontaneous as I used to be. Um, it's just not for me. I I am spontaneous, but for things when it comes to big events, I'm probably not that spontaneous. So I I had somebody reach out to me and they were like, Do you want to what are you doing? Do you want to come to my gig? And they hadn't actually invited me to that when they were in London. I was like, I would love to come. I'm actually in London. And I was thinking, I would love to go and see them perform. This would be amazing. And then it developed like I could I couldn't go on the day that they were around because I was going to this Marilyn thing on Monday. I said, I am around on Sunday. And they said the park, and I was like, I I don't know. They said it was a festival. I was like, hold on, let me just Google what festival's on. And I was like, it's Mighty Hoopla. I've actually never been to Mighty Hoopla, can you believe? Um, but I was like, this could be really great fun. So I was like, me being me, I don't do things my halves. I quickly organised my glam squad. I was like, look, this has come up. I fancy doing it, it'd be a laugh. I haven't done anything like this on my own, obviously, since the cocktails, since being with Sophie, it just didn't feel right. Why would I want to do anything without her? So, and I still don't, I'll be honest about that. I would still rather have her here and it be us two going on together, and that will always remain the same. Um, but you know, that said, this is life and this is where I am, and um I was like, this will be fun, this will be fun, and I I think my hoopola looks so much fun. Anyway, I said um to the artist, I said, could you just you know confirm it all by a certain time? Now I think it's been really difficult, I think it is quite difficult to like get sort of that kind of confirmation. Anyway, they were super busy, and I I think it was like quite late at night when there was some plans. I was like, I I start talking myself, I start talking myself out of things, and I just start thinking, this doesn't feel good anymore, this doesn't feel good anymore. I'm gonna be like, I I'm not gonna have anywhere to change, da da da. And I just thought I I just don't think I can do this anymore. So I said, Do you know what? It doesn't feel good anymore. It is a bit last minute, and I don't think I'm prepared for what's involved to be a last minute kind of arrangement. Like I don't want to be sort of sitting around and I I don't want to be with all due respect, and I don't think this person meant that, I don't want to be a puppet, like do you know what I mean? Okay, you can go, oh, I'll bring you in. No, no, no, no, you know, I'm not, I'm a little bit too old in the tooth for that. So I would have loved it if it had worked out brilliant, it would have been such fun. Um, and I still absolutely adore them anyway. That didn't happen, uh, but nonetheless, um, I am doing, I have been booked for Manchester Pride to do something there. There's going to be something going on. I will, once they advertise it, I will share it with you. And this will actually be uh the first time that I'm actually venturing out as a solo act since the Cock Destroyers as a solo, you know, in any sort of performance um with a gay crowd, because that was very much for me an identity that I had with Sophie, and it's definitely and it's been a really hard one for me to do that to venture out on my own, um, because I would always love it to be with her. It I I it will always be more of a laugh to still be in the cocktail strawers, you know, and I am I do have uh trouble letting go and you know accepting that you know like she's never coming back. I know I harp on about it, but I just think that's part of grief is like I do have to let go, obviously. I do, and I think the memorial is obviously gonna be something like that where you just you know it's it's uh end of a an era and uh saying goodbye, but I just don't think it it doesn't get any easier, it really doesn't. So, yes, that's what I wanted to share with you is I'm getting back out there a little bit more, not massively, but I'm really excited to get out and be with um the community again and have fun, like actually have fun. I've struggled to have fun. I I try, I really try, but I have been grieving for a very long time. And to to it's like opening it, it's like going, right, that's the end of that. I'm gonna put away my tit tape and my fishnets and my heels because that that's my broken heart in that case. And I'm gonna go and do something else because my heart is so broken, I can't even think about that. But I'm starting to like be okay with it a little bit more. I'm starting going, okay, you know, I I want to have fun, I want to lighten up, I just want to be out there being crazy, and I I really enjoy that. And I don't think I've been able to do that for a very, very long time to the extent that Sophie and I were like so so wild, so crazy. I could just be be like that with her. She had this way of when we were together, of just just absolutely getting just just fucking going nuts. It was very encourable and it was nice. I like being around people like that. Um, so anyway, next thing. So Sunday happened. Anyway, I was going into London and I went to I I shared this with you on the last podcast, was I'm going, I was going to Marilyn Monroe. It's her birthday, 100th birthday on June the 1st, which um I didn't actually know. Um I found out so much about Marilyn. I went to the National Portrait Gallery, which is going to be on all summer. You should go. It was absolutely amazing. I want to go back. I went to see Marilyn Monroe a portrait at the National Portrait Gallery in London, and I was there on the Monday, and it was like the first opening. It's actually going to be open from the 4th of June through to the 6th of September. Tickets cost um 25 to 27 or 27.50 to 30 with donation free for members. Um, so you can book it, it was absolutely brilliant. I there was so many things that I had never seen of Marilyn. Marilyn is one of the first icons that I've ever known about, and I've watched a few things, and it's all very sad, and but she she's total icon, so beautiful. Um and it's really amazing to hear about her. So many she carries such a legacy, then so many people copy her, and that's okay because she's an icon. Why wouldn't we? Why wouldn't we? I mean, I've even done it as well. Madonna, everybody, everybody's referenced Marilyn Monroe in some way, and the pictures, all the photographers she worked with are so it's so stunning. Some of her work is just so stunning, she really looks amazing, and her iconic blonde hair, and some of the write-ups that you'll go around, you'll look at the pictures and you'll see a bit of history. Her shoes were there, which I thought was like crazy because you're like Marilyn's feet have been in these shoes, they actually look really small, and there's some sad bits too, but there's some beautiful artwork that you've probably never seen. It's huge, it's really fabulous, and I had such a good time. It was quite nice to be in that environment. I went with my hairdresser and my hairdresser Alex Sabo. Um, so the funny let's connect these two stories. So Sunday I had immediately booked my glam squad, who you know, I fund myself and they are amazing. They very kindly said to me, Yep, we will be available for you on the Sunday, which is to be honest, going above and beyond what a normal glam squad should do. Maybe you know, I'm asking them to take give up their Sunday. So that said, it was a bit difficult. I I thought, you know what, I'm not if all of this doesn't go well and I've funded, you know, the glam squad, fuck this. And I I said to them, I said, I'm gonna have to pull this. I'm gonna have to pull this because I'm not sure. But I was seeing Alex anyway, who's doing my colour and doing my hair. I was like, Yin is the new makeup artist I've got. I said, Yin, do you mind coming on the Monday? And she was like, Absolutely, I'm available. I was like, you know, when you all start, you I didn't think she'd say yes, I was thinking, oh, this is because it was the first time I've actually had her doing my makeup, trying out this new makeup artist, and she was available. I was like, this is gonna be a good day, and it was really, really nice. I met Alex for breakfast, I stayed at the Corinthia, I'd done a little bit of work the night before, I'd had a really fun night the night before. Um, everything just panned out really well. I had some fun at the Corinthia, got some content, and met Alex in the morning for breakfast, which was absolutely lovely. I had a little swim, sauna and that before he came. Went to the gym. I'm trying to get back in the gym. Oh my gosh, I was aching all this week. Um, so he came for breakfast, it was delicious. Then we hung out all day. We got room service, he was doing my colour, we were just having such fun and such a laugh. Yin turned up in the afternoon and I had hair extensions. Yin did my makeup. I felt a million dollars. I felt so good. And I've got this thing that I'm not buying new clothes all the time. So all the I had three outfits that was like it's either this one, this one, or this one. And the one that I was convinced that I was gonna wear, I was absolutely convinced I was gonna wear the see-through dress with lingerie under it, and that was gonna be the one. But I I knew I liked all of the dresses anyway. As soon as I had the hair makeup on, we tried on the dress that I wore. We knew we were like, it's a home run, that is it, that's the one that we're gonna have. And so I put on my clothes and I just felt amazing. I felt like that. Oh, I love this, you know, having my hair and makeup done because anything feels good then when you've got your hair and makeup done. And I just had such a good evening, so we went there, they had a free like champagne, what have you. Obviously, I don't drink champagne, and I went up to this lovely looking young man, and um, he had non-alcoholic drinks on his tray, and I took one, I was like, Oh, that's nice, and I noticed that he was a very handsome young man. Later, I must say, this guy got into my DMs, and I must say, he's a very brave guy. He asked me out for a drink. I was like, How old are you, darling? How old are you, sweetie? 21 and a half. I went no, no. I have a rule, I have a strict rule that I cannot date men younger than my son. I stick to it. Um, so that was a lot of fun. It's very it's uh it's always good for the ego to be asked out, but yeah, I'm very popular with the younger guys, as you can imagine. Anyway, we had a great time. We went to uh Covardi's or something like that after in Soho. It was pissing down with rain. I'm so glad I took a umbrella. Then I got back and had a really, really amazing sleep. Got had to get home the next day, and I was filming. I was uh filming a new reality show that I've decided to do for my YouTube, and I hope you're gonna love it, and I hope you're gonna watch it and let me know your feedback, but I'm really enjoying it. So the the Sophie the Sophie's garden, her memorial garden is fast approaching, okay? And I am getting a bit nervous, I've taken it in my stride. It's it's quite it's so important to me. I'm not gonna get another chance to do this again. This is it, everything's got to be right. I've got to get all her pictures, I need to make sure the guests are happy. It is a special day to remember Sophie, and I'm I'm taking it very seriously. I want the guests to be happy, but I also have this feeling that if Sophie's watching, she'd be really happy too. So everything in mind is like it's not about me this day, it's not about me, it's about actually what would Sophie want. I wish she was here to bloody enjoy it, to be honest. She'd love it. Um, and in my heart and my spirit, it's like she is really, she is here. So we I've organized, I had some friends come over to help me choose some entertainment for the evening. I've got a singer for the day, some entertainment for the evening, and I was just like, I'm gonna get try magicians. I've got three magicians, and we filmed like 24 hours of us watching each magician. It's so fun, such a laugh. I I urge you to watch it. At the end, we kind of I was like, what other act would be amazing, you know? And we were like, we should get a drag queen, a drag queen act. And I was I was like, I know so many drag queens, like I I don't know who to actually ask, and you know, it's quite a long way to come and things like that, and you know, costs are racking up, they're really, really racking up, and I have to be careful because you know, you don't want to bankrupt myself, but they're racking up, and I've I've just got to stick to a budget, so you know, and that said, obviously, we're paying people, you know, it's very important, but you know, I've got to cut back here, cut back there. So there was a suggestion made, and I remember when Sophie and I first went viral, people were um like dressing up as us, and there were these they're from America though, but there was these two drag queens who were so amazing, they perfected it, and they had these massive boobs and they dress up in black fishnet and with the crossing that was amazing. I was like thinking, I wonder if there would be two drag queens who would be like up for like doing a tribute act, like being me and you know, me and Sophie for the day, because the truth is Sophie and I it was never meant to be normal, none of it was, and I know I'd be like, if I had Sophie's ear right now, I'd be like, Sophie, I'm doing your memorial. Would you think about me doing like a tr getting a tribute act of us two just walking around the memorial, like this really serious memorial remembering you? Um would you fancy? Do you think that's a great idea? She'd go, yeah, babes, that'd be fucking amazing. I really do think like Sophie's not one for like she was never one for she was compassionate and she had empathy, but I think when it comes to herself, she would like she wants everything to be fun, and I think that it's a good idea, and I think it would be quite funny, like the dynamics of the the whole day being you know, remembrance and quite solemn and then quite fun and enjoyable. And I do think it would be pretty cool to have like the absolute memory of the cock destroyers with you know, with massive I don't know what they call them, the chest plates is it, you know, walking around on fishnets, just be quite fun, quite lighten up, lighten up that that it is quite a sad day as well, is uh remembrance of her life, which is how I want to maintain it is positive. But there are going to be moments where I do get sad, where I do talk about her, and I just can't help myself where I get really, really sad. Um, so yes, if anybody knows anybody who fancies being a tribute act for not one but two of the cock destroyers for Sophie's Memorial Garden Party, please get in touch or please put your suggestions because I would love to book you. It's um really difficult book it doing all this. It's it's I thought it'd be so easy, but things are starting to really I can feel the pressure now, and I'm not I'm not gonna give up, I'm gonna keep going. I've got so much to do, I've got um pictures to get, I've got um, you know, all sorts, all sorts seating, hiring, and things like that. And it is it is gonna be an amazing day, and it will what will be will be. Um, but yeah, that is definitely something that I'm looking for as well. So check out that. That's gonna go live. Um, if this comes out soon, then that will be this Sunday. Um, is it's gonna be on anyway. If not, it will be the Sunday that's just gone. So watch it anyway, check it out. Um so moving swiftly on, while the girls were here, we couldn't help but talk about a certain person who's out there, and I don't like talking about this people person. I've never really talked about this person publicly. Um, I feel that I should. Um a few people have asked me my opinion. I try and really stay very, very detached. It's hard not to, but she's out again, she's out trauma dumping on the public again. The one and only Bonnie Blue is now got another stunt, and she is allegedly pregnant. I don't know, but some of the pictures do look like she is. Um, nothing, I don't really believe anything anymore that comes out of her mouth. But that said, what if she is? Um it's all very confusing, and I think there's a lot of um lot of eyes on her right now. I hope there is because if there is a baby, it's deeply concerning what she's doing. Um I I have no words to be quite honest, what she does sometimes, and sometimes it does really it makes it can make me angry because without a doubt, it has affected um people who are trying to stay under the radar, and there's a lot of single mothers in the industry, um, and they're trying to stay under the radar and just be left alone to be able to uh feed their kids, do whatever it is, and I do without a doubt, look, I know the men are just as bad that turning up to these things, but we feel I think the truth is is a lot of us workers, we feel that Bonnie doesn't care about us and the impact she has on us, and that's the problem. She doesn't give a shit about the impact she has on us and the impact she has on women as a general, and I think that's why people dislike her so much, is because there's no consideration. I I've always had consideration. If somebody has said to me, listen, this is affecting me, I will go back. I've I've got that level of consideration and been like, I'm gonna tone that down, I'm gonna change that, and I will. There's certain things that I will go, no, no, I will take it, but I will take it on board and take and have a level of consideration. Essentially, I'm for the girls, I'm a girls girl, I'm not a pick me, I'm a don't pick me. Um, I've always been for the girls. I love men, I love you, but my my sisterhood is super important to me. So I cannot relate to this new world of rage bait, rage bait for a woman, and it is it is different. It is women are treated so much differently to men, so it's so bizarre. It's like that old thing. Um, we know a man's gonna, you know, in the in the world, men don't show up for their children, but we're more so shocked if a woman mistreats her child, or it's the woman really, really gets a hard, gets a hard kind of deal um in society. So so Bonnie is gonna be getting that because Bonnie's a woman, she is gonna be getting more of a kind of bollocking from everybody. I stood up for her once. I remember she her and Lily were doing something. I was like, leave her alone. Like, I didn't know, I didn't know what she what she was saying. I was actually really taken back. I've never Come across a woman like this before, but maybe they have have been out there, but it's just not getting the exposure that Bonnie's getting. The thing is, is because Bonnie is quite good looking. Have we sort of got some halo effect? Are people like kind of getting her into the mainstream and interviewing her and thinking it's okay? But really, she's quite a red flag. Like, hello. Um, the sexualization of what she's doing is definitely a big fat red flag, and I'd be so surprised if um she's not being monitored uh by social services or what have you, which is quite quite sad, really. It's really sad. I don't like to judge other women, um, but I think when children are involved, it becomes a lot more serious. Um, I don't know what's going to happen. Uh, everybody's talking about it. She's got people talking again. If she's if it's a fake pregnancy, yeah, it's still disturbing, but it's a damn sight lot better than if it there was a real baby involved, which is really quite sad, um, to be honest. And I just have no words. Where does she go next? And we are glad, most of us, most people I've spoken to, we are glad that she's not on OnlyFans anymore because it was really affecting the site massively, and it probably would have got shut down at some stage. Um, because we all abide by the by the rules there. There's been loads of things that you can't do, and that's okay. It's you do need to have checks, checks, and balances so everyone doesn't just go off the rails and do what the hell they want, because we do need to keep it safe for youngsters. The internet is just um a free-for-all right now, and there's all sorts of stuff going on, and things need to be better, and it's there's no point in just blaming the adult stars because I think it's a case of these big companies that they need to have the and you know the laws have come in to um have people's ID and things like that, and I I think it is important, it's so important to protect the future generations. Um adult material is always gonna be there, and it's not education, that's the problem we have is this rise of people use getting so addicted to it. Addiction's awful no matter what it is, whether it's drink, drugs, or whatever you're addicted to, it's not good. Adult material is a tool, it's a tool to enjoy, maybe in a relationship, not to like do every day, every second of the day, and wreck your relationships, and that happens, that really does. So, I've seen it where you know guys don't know how to treat women, they don't know how to be intimate with a woman, they don't know how to talk to a woman, they don't know what a woman wants because adult material a lot of it isn't really what a woman wants, and a lot of uh I have noticed, and you know, if you're making money out of it, you're gonna go, yeah, this is really what I want, but in true intimacy is not really adult material, it's really not. Um, I do think for me personally, having a connection, a mental connection, what do they call it, demisexual? I think is really where you get that's the ultimate utopia. I think when you meet someone, it's just like bang, bang, bang, and then it's like a one-night stand. It's actually it might be um amazing at the time, but it's it's like getting a hit of a line, and that's addiction for you. It's it's I I think it's very, very addictive. Um, but when I've had proper relationships, that's that's built up over time, and things can get better and better and better. The lack of men, younger, I think the younger gener more the younger generation, I think there's a problem between 27 and 35 from the data I'm collecting. Um, the amount of guys that don't try or know or want to is shocking. It's shocking. It really is. It's sad, it's sad. It just so bizarre. It really is. That eye contact, the lack of eye contact as well. Very bizarre. So I'm I'm I'm watching and I'm seeing the effects that overconsumption of adult material is having on young guys. I know it's there. I know it's there. Anyway, what will be will be, and if you want some education, I'm your girl. Yeah, I think it's important to share with guys what women really want. And it's it's actually not that hard. We're so different though, a lot guys. I can really tell an emotionally intelligent guy when I meet one. I've been very lucky to meet a lot, but I am concerned about the younger, the younger guys. Yeah, I've noticed a bit of a pass a pattern. And most guys from 40 up are generally like I'd say the majority of them are doing great. They're doing great, they really are, but yeah, it's the younger ones that I I do that their go-to must be getting that laptop up all the time, and I definitely wouldn't want to encourage that. I wouldn't want to encourage, I think um adult material can uh addiction is gonna ruin a lot of relationships a lot. To be quite honest, if I was with a boyfriend, you're gonna you're I'm gonna get a lot of criticism for this, right? If I had a boyfriend and I caught him look at without me, now you can do it with me. Yeah, that's it's you know, we'll we'll agree to that. And if he was sleekily looking at adult material without me, no thanks. For me, that's cheating. That's cheating. What's the point? What's the point in having a girlfriend? What's the point? I really don't know. But you know, I'm not one I do think monogamous relationships are problematic, you know, but you're gonna get bored one day, and you need to open that shit up and go, darling, I want to see someone else. Would you like to join us? And I'd like to see you with someone else. Look, I'm just different, okay? But to be honest, I can't see me getting into a monogamous relationship again. No, I know too much. I know too much to do that. I'm just having a great time doing what I do. I'm having a great time. I've never had such a good time. Anyway, I don't want to have to talk about Bonnie Blue again, but she keeps coming back with these crazy stunts. I hope it's a hoax, I really do, and I'll be like, oh, thank goodness. But if it's not, and and I don't know if anybody can prove that. She's been on. Did they say, can we have a look at your belly? Can we have a look? Can you just prove that it's not a fake? Um, I I have no clue. I don't know what to believe anymore, but I really do hope. And people are gonna be like, yeah, even if it's not, no, but the truth is there is no baby in there. If there isn't a baby in there, great. But if there is, I do hope that there will be some checks and balances in place because saying your baby shower is going to be a golden shower, and all the guys are gonna that's that's like that's that's a whole world. That's wild. That's wild, even by my standards, it's wild, it's wild. That is to me overstepping the mark and overstepping it, and more and so and more so. Anyway, oh yeah, there was a point that I had about that. We were talking about me and the girls when we were having this conversation about Bonnie Blue, and you'll be able to see it on um we had a little we were having breakfast and we were like, okay, we can't we can't ignore this. We can't ignore it. We said try and ignore it and we can't ignore it. We had a little discussion about it, and what we were saying is that we're confused, we don't understand a girl making so much money. Why don't you just retire? And I think she's quite unique. I think she's just on her own out there doing her thing, going, fuck you, fuck you. I'm gonna do what I want, and you know, fuck the baby as well. But um fame, I think there's I I'm not really that crazy about fame, whatever. I'm all about the money and buying my peace, buying my freedom. We all are we do what we do, we enjoy it. Um, work is work, but that money buys my peace and buys my freedom. That was all it ever was about. Buying the peace, buying the freedom, and I feel like I'm there. And we all kind of agreed, we were like, Yeah, it's lovely having our freedom and our peace. Bonnie Blue doesn't seem to have that, she doesn't seem to have peace, it's fucking mental. She must have quite the security because to be that famous, she is worldwide famous. That's terrifying for a woman doing what she's doing, that's terrifying, absolutely terrifying. I don't get it. And fame, if you're so obsessed with becoming famous, that's that's wild, isn't it? You know, I was a bit worried about that when it came to Sophie, and you know, that that obsession with fame, that that like whether it's good or bad, was the first time that I started seeing that. That I was when we weren't kind of talking that no matter what she was doing, as long as she was getting attention, it could be bad, and like them doing weird shit. I was like, this is fucking nuts. Wouldn't you want to be famous for the right things? But there's loads of people that do stuff like that. Like, look at Andrew Tate, look at um Katie, what's her name? Not Katie Price, she's a legend. Um Katie Hopkins, a really good example of somebody that fed into this kind of original female rage baiting arsehole. And I actually don't really think she's like that. Well, she might be, but Katie Hopkins is another one that has gone for that. That's that's gonna be their brand. They did better by being a rage bait rather than being nice. Nice doesn't sell, it's true, but I just I can't get into that rage bait. I just want to live a nice I want to live a nice peaceful life, really. That means a lot more to me than millions of pounds. Um yeah, the fame thing. Now that we're in this kind of internet y world where anyone can be famous, you can be TikTok famous, you can be Instagram famous, Twitter famous, TV famous, whatever, Twitch famous, everyone wants to be famous. I don't want to be famous, I want my peace. What I have to do is it's important to put yourself out there and what have you. But I love, I love being able to walk down the road and no one say a word. That's beautiful, that's wonderful. I love it, it's fucking amazing. I get so much peace. I couldn't imagine, I couldn't imagine anything worse than looking like shit and everyone's going, hello, can I take a picture? You're a cunt, you know. Uh Body Blues life is just nuts. And we were talking about it wasn't her that said this, but somebody had said, and it was funny. She was on the um what's his name? Okay, so it was on the Elbrook was on the Piers Morgan. Um, she was being interviewed by Piers Morgan once, and she said he was talking about having children and things like that. And everybody, I think this is the hardest thing, is that's the easiest, it's a low-hanging fruit when you talk to a sex worker about having children. It's it's it's tricky, it really is. And we know that, you know, you're gonna, it's the low-hanging fruit. So she came back with this saying, Well, they can cry and say Ferrari, and it went viral because it kind of stumped him, stumped him and made him look a bit silly and whatnot. Now, my personal view on this comment is I I agree, money makes life really, really easy, it makes it a lot better, it really does, but it's not everything, and I've learned that along the way is true happiness comes from you just that peace, the inner peace, your surroundings, your freedom. And I would rather go without a Ferrari and have my kids happy, you know, it is really important, and you make choices in life, some things work out, some things don't, but that is that is it, that's life. You're not gonna be able to everybody wants to there's not everybody, but lots of people want to ban adult material, it's not gonna happen, it's still gonna exist, you know, and people will have children, and you I think I've been a very responsible parent. I've made choices in life, not all good, not all bad, but I do feel I've got a great relationship with my daughter, not so much my son, and I think that's more so to do with the fact I was so young when I have had him, as opposed to my job. I don't think my job helped at all. At all. I mean it's definitely harder for boys than it is girls, but that was that was my choices in life, you know, and no one's perfect, not one person on this planet is perfect, not one person can throw that stone, you know. That going back to this bloody AI thing, I posted two pictures of AI. Oh my god, what and you're perfect, are you? None of us are, we can only do our best to this week. It's been absolutely mental rounds here. So I got back, and on the Tuesday, we had Donna Wildcard here, Adrina Angela, and Mistress Mika. Now, Mistress Um Karina was meant to come, but she wasn't very well. So they all arrived on the Tuesday and we had dinner and we had our first entertainer. We it was quite crazy because I had one entertainer that let me down, and I literally had to arrange Sam within 24 hours. And I love this uh magician called Sam Hearst. He confirmed by 12 o'clock and he was at mine by about six, and he he went through a lot to get here, he was just absolutely amazing, and he didn't really know what he was letting himself in for. But this guy was so much fun, he was so funny, and I really I haven't made my decision who I'm gonna have yet, but it's a really hard decision, and I do think I'm gonna pick him because he was just so brilliant. Um, and then we had another, oh my gosh, you'll have to watch The Next Magician and the next one, because boy, have you you're you're gonna be stunned. It was you've got to watch the series, okay? So they're coming out real soon. Um, so very eventful, but honestly, it was full on for me. I had Donna here, not Donna Wildcard. We call we called that we named one Donna Big Tits, and that's how we differentiate them. Work out which one's which. Um, Donna is my PA and she's just been so amazing, organising everything. It rained, so we had to have cover. Um, she did all the food, she was just fabulous, and we're all so exhausted, but it was so worth it. It was just such a fabulous time, and it's it gave us a feeling about how how busy and chaotic it's gonna be when Sophie's Memorial Day here. There's things we're probably gonna organise Portaloo, uh, a really nice one, so it's you know, the house isn't being wrecked because there's a lot of people. Um, so yeah, we're gonna we've got a lot to plan, and we are gonna be documenting it, so please follow us for that. Also, while we're doing all this, currently I have um guys out there right now flattening. We've got lawn, a lot, another lawn to do, we've got the architect showing me what's going where, what's happening. We've had a few changes of plans today, but everything is going really well. I've got Rick over today who's actually gonna I've got so much to do that my brain is frazzled, and we're gonna work things out about you know how what order to do them. So that said, I do have a lot to get on with, and I am gonna go off. I'm gonna end this podcast by showing you my vision board for Sophie's garden. Um, I think I may have shown you it before, um, but here it is, okay. Right, and I feel like it's all coming along. I might add even add a few bits. There's me, there's one of my favourite pictures of me and her that was taken uh at Slag Wars, and really honestly, Sophie never looked so good. She was thriving, she was looked amazing, didn't she look beautiful? And basically, I've got her name there, The Strange Garden. I've this was it when it was like it's a skeleton, but I've put all the flowers, and truly, it's starting to really blossom so so much. We have so many insects and birds and everything coming up now. There's dragonflies, newts, um, little tiny little birds everywhere. It's it's it's really magical, it's so coming alive, and I cannot wait to share it with you. You will be part of this. I I love sharing this with you, and I'm just really proud of it, and it makes me feel so good to be channelling my grief in this way through the garden. It feels so good to finally let go of my resentments and things like that. Resentments for her not being here anymore. I just have a huge, it's so it's it's difficult. It is difficult. That'll probably never go. Um, but I need to put my energy somewhere, and it's it's coming alive, and I love it. The flowers just looking beautiful. We've had a lot of rain, which has been positive and a negative. Um, but I will leave you there. I've got so much to do, so much to get on with. I hope you've enjoyed this podcast. Um, and I look forward to seeing you next week. Please like and subscribe. Um, make comments, follow me. I need your support. Um, and yes, if anybody knows of anybody who can play.