Episode 6 - Durag Drag

finally got the audio/soundboard figured out. we touch on halloween, sebastian maniscalco's movie idea, and the property brothers

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:04

Welcome to the show, everyone.

SPEAKER_07 0:06

Live from the cream pie. It's the horrible hang.

SPEAKER_02 0:09

It is the horrible hang. We had a little bit of a technical difficulty last time. We recorded an entire episode. Basically, I had to trash it all. Cause you well, the first half of the episode just the sound effects were three times as loud as the rest of the audio. And the second half of it, like it was just so quiet you could hear like nothing at all.

SPEAKER_07 0:27

It's a horrible hang. It was a useless, horrible hang.

SPEAKER_02 0:29

It was a useless, horrible hang. I want to tip that Mike.

SPEAKER_07 0:32

It was probably the greatest podcast episode ever recorded, and you guys don't get to hear it now, which is very sad.

SPEAKER_02 0:37

Well, we got some of the same bits, so we're gonna I well You're not supposed to tell them that, dude. Well we're honest on this podcast, so maybe you are.

SPEAKER_07 0:46

I'm honest. Fuck it, dude. I fucking hate the listeners. Fucking hate them all. Oh, 13 of them?

SPEAKER_02 0:54

Although we've spent not by much, maybe like one a week. But slowly people are starting to feel it out a little bit.

SPEAKER_07 1:01

I feel like now we're starting to get into the Russian bots, and now we're about to make some big, big, big money, big cash coming this way. I showed you big Jewish attorneys because we're gonna have lots of money.

SPEAKER_02 1:12

I showed you my big marketing move, right?

SPEAKER_07 1:15

What's your big marketing move?

SPEAKER_02 1:16

Yeah, a fucking hoodie.

SPEAKER_07 1:17

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:19

It has the QR code on the back of it.

SPEAKER_07 1:21

QR code, tie it.

SPEAKER_02 1:23

Oh, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:23

You ever want to get pussy? Put on a horrible hang hoodie and go out. And just try and beat, bring a stick to beat them off you with. Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_02 1:31

Yeah, just come and beat me with metal instruments, please. Because I like it.

SPEAKER_07 1:40

Just order a hoodie,$200.59.

SPEAKER_02 1:44

So uh this is the episode, guys, where we finally say the N-word, guys. We finally say the N-word. And uh Andy, take it away. Are you ready?

SPEAKER_07 1:52

Are you guys ready? Take it away. Alright.

SPEAKER_02 1:57

How's that feeling?

SPEAKER_07 1:58

Quick one. That was a quick one and felt good to get out.

SPEAKER_02 2:00

Felt good to get out. Also, I thought we should mention uh me and Andy are both in blackface right now. We're doing this whole podcast in blackface.

SPEAKER_07 2:08

Yes, we are. It's it's very uncomfortable, it's very warm. Um yeah, that's all I really got on blackface right now.

SPEAKER_02 2:16

Andy, Andy insisted on the big red lips. I said it was a little too much, but he insisted on it.

SPEAKER_07 2:22

I mean, if you're gonna do the character, you gotta do the character. They're doing a disservice.

SPEAKER_02 2:27

Did you want to press a button? I saw you playing the sign.

SPEAKER_07 2:29

I just I need to reacquaint myself with all the buttons again. This is the one that oh, this is the button when Kyle talks, is what we hit.

unknown 2:38

Good one, good one.

SPEAKER_07 2:39

Oh, oh, Andy said something funny. This is so much fun, just hit the buttons. I I like it.

SPEAKER_02 2:59

Yeah, we'll we'll we'll go easy on it because each one of these is ear rape to the listeners.

SPEAKER_07 3:04

But once again, I don't give a fuck about the listeners, so I'm gonna keep hitting the buttons as much as I fucking want to.

SPEAKER_02 3:09

Well, we well, they're still there.

SPEAKER_07 3:10

That's still the reason I bought the soundboard. So I'm just not a fan of them. Fuck them. I don't care. Fuck the listeners.

SPEAKER_02 3:18

Fuck the listeners. Well, don't fuck. I guess you could fuck them.

SPEAKER_07 3:21

I don't want to fuck our our listeners are definitely the people the kind of listeners you don't want to fuck on a podcast.

SPEAKER_02 3:26

Yeah, that is true. That is true.

SPEAKER_07 3:29

Alright, fellas. We're all men here. Come on, nobody wants to fuck any of us.

SPEAKER_02 3:36

So uh I'll start. I'll I guess I'll start off with uh this one. How's what'd you do for Halloween? Did you do anything or dude?

SPEAKER_07 3:43

Went trick-or-treat and took the little took took the kiddos out. Um nice, nice. We have uh Jesse and Woody. Yeah, which is true to life, look just like 'em.

SPEAKER_02 3:53

Hell yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_07 3:54

Um it was snowing, which is fucking bullshit. I hate when weather ruins Halloween.

SPEAKER_02 4:00

Yeah, I remember that, dude. I remember that.

SPEAKER_07 4:02

The older I get, the more I'm turning into like a curmudgeony old man, but it's like, god damn it, we gotta have these kids, you gotta have their fucking Halloween.

SPEAKER_02 4:08

No, I know.

SPEAKER_07 4:09

I'm really getting like kind of like that.

SPEAKER_02 4:11

Dude, I'm getting like that too. I I fucking worked on Halloween, dude. I was just I'm not I I don't really do Halloween. Although fucking uh I did, I did get invited to a Halloween party, right? The day before Halloween.

SPEAKER_07 4:24

Which kind? It's either if it's our age and we're gonna have a Halloween party, it needs to be we're gonna like project X Drunk, or it's literally an orgy. Or what are you doing?

SPEAKER_02 4:35

It was actually my first black gathering, which is all fun, yes.

SPEAKER_07 4:39

Were you the white guy?

SPEAKER_02 4:40

Uh there was other white guys.

SPEAKER_07 4:42

No res I don't got respect for it.

SPEAKER_02 4:43

I'm sorry. Listen, baby steps, dude. Baby steps.

SPEAKER_07 4:47

Baby steps, yes.

SPEAKER_02 4:48

But uh we had we had a game night, right?

SPEAKER_07 4:51

And I had I'll admit, I had never we I understand I missed it by 20 minutes, but you didn't need to call those people that.

SPEAKER_02 4:59

Okay. I'm sorry, I couldn't help. It's a regular party. It slips out no matter how hard I try. I'm I'm Papa John over here, bro. I'm Papa John over here, bro. But no, we had game night, and I gotta admit, I had never played Uno before. It was my first time ever playing Uno.

SPEAKER_07 5:15

This is bullshit. Did you guys play white Uno or Black Uno? And this is something that's been explained to me by my black girlfriend.

SPEAKER_01 5:20

I think it I think it was Black Uno.

SPEAKER_07 5:22

Black Uno's bullshit. Bro, it's just it's just the biggest swings of all time. Yeah, well, it's just oh, I have one card. Oh fuck, now I have 70 cards. That's what the game is. It's like none of this makes sense. I would have won 12 times over if we were in my neighborhood.

SPEAKER_02 5:39

Well, dude, I was like my first time ever playing. Apparently, I won the whole game. Now, granted, I had somebody else basically telling me what to do, so it didn't really count. Wow, that's sad. It was sad, but apparently the hands I had were good enough. You were a muse. Who was your who is spotting you?

SPEAKER_07 5:56

You're you're a Nuno Muse.

SPEAKER_02 5:57

What am I one of my buddies?

SPEAKER_07 5:59

Homie?

SPEAKER_02 5:59

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 6:00

Damn, you gotta have a girl coach in you, Nuno brother. But uh two men aren't allowed to team up.

SPEAKER_02 6:06

But no, fucking I I guess I won the game, and it was crazy. The whole uh the entire crowd celebrated like I won them the Super Bowl. Whoa, it was like one of the most surreal moments of my life.

SPEAKER_07 6:18

Wow, it was like out of high school musical.

SPEAKER_02 6:20

It was like out of high school musical, dude.

SPEAKER_07 6:23

Why why was everybody so excited you won? I I just I don't know. I think it was just like a moment, it was like the new guy. Also, just made me I like got in my car with it on, and I was like, this is fucked up to be fat. Yeah, it was literally Is this what it's like to be fat? It was literally a fat suit. It was literally a fat suit, and I had a bunch of layers of jackets on, and I'm like, I wouldn't buckle if I was fat.

SPEAKER_02 6:46

But uh, so it was like dress, like dressing up is required at this party, and uh me and my buddy, he he my nickname for him is 50 Cent because his name's Kurt, Curtis Jackson. Wow, and everyone calls me Eminem because I look like Eminem. So I went as Eminem, right? And you know, I just got like a big t-shirt, a fucking Jordan, you know, tech.

SPEAKER_07 7:07

Oh wow, I gotta see this.

SPEAKER_02 7:09

I'll I'll show I I got a picture somewhere, and I got like the big thing, and I got like the the uh visor, put it on backwards. I like it, but I gotta be honest, like I put it on and it just felt so right. You know what I mean? It just I really felt like I was my true self, you know.

SPEAKER_07 7:25

Who's really in the costume right now, dude?

SPEAKER_02 7:27

Honestly, dude. And I I gotta be honest right now, I've I've been wearing it around the house. Like so you might be the real shady. I might be the real shady stand up. I don't know. I I got the other day I bought a do-rag. I'm really leaning into it, bro.

SPEAKER_07 7:41

I think like I'm really liking this whole this is this is the most obvious turn that I've ever seen in the history of the world. You need to become full on M.

SPEAKER_02 7:51

I I want to become full on black, is what I'm getting at. Eventually, I'm just gonna do the full transition.

SPEAKER_07 7:58

You know what I mean? Something's happening, you know? Something's something's going on with you. That's for sure.

SPEAKER_02 8:03

You're fucking buying do rags, and it's like my version of drag. Do a little do-rag drag, you know what I mean? Like a cross dresser, but he's a wigger.

SPEAKER_07 8:16

A cross dresser. Wow.

SPEAKER_02 8:18

Eventually I'm just gonna be the full wigger.

SPEAKER_07 8:20

That's great for like dudes that want to be a wigger so bad. But no, they're not cool enough to pull it off. So you just do it at home and on Halloween. And that's the only day of the year they're actually themselves.

SPEAKER_02 8:32

Yeah, and then eventually you just gotta come out to your parents. That's gonna be tough.

SPEAKER_07 8:35

What a horrible life, man. Guys, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:38

I don't know what my parents are gonna say when I tell them I'm truly, actually black.

SPEAKER_07 8:43

Guys, I'm suffering from chent hanxitis. I was not I was born in the wrong skin tone. I was born in the wrong skin. My melanin is only there on the inside, it doesn't show through through my skin. I'm not truly this pasty white fucking loser. I'm a cool black man. I could never be a pasty white honk.

SPEAKER_02 9:07

That's kind of what I was hoping would happen to you once you started dating your girlfriend, though.

SPEAKER_07 9:11

I feel like I ended up doubling down on my gay whiteness. Really? Yeah. I like started listening to country music and shit.

SPEAKER_02 9:19

I was really hoping you'd lean into it. I think I might lean into it, dude.

SPEAKER_07 9:23

You should. I think there's there's plenty of space in uh in the world for more dudes going into it. I feel like it's an underused market.

SPEAKER_02 9:30

I want like a picture of me like sitting on a stoop and like a girl braiding my hair giving you cord rolls in the back. Yeah, I I start saying things like shit, man. Like that. I don't know.

SPEAKER_07 9:44

Like, I always got a fun, you always got a little fun dip on you.

SPEAKER_02 9:47

I start wearing wife beaters one day. Like I wake up in the middle of the night, I've got like holding my jeans up. I got the gun in the waistband.

SPEAKER_07 9:55

You've got Chicago Bulls branded wrist straps for some reason. You just get really big into jerseys. It's like, yo, Kyle's got that fresh Mitchell and Ness again. How many throwbacks that cat got?

SPEAKER_02 10:12

Matt, man, I want a hellcat.

SPEAKER_06 10:15

She starts wondering. Scat pack, but whatever.

SPEAKER_02 10:25

Uh, did you have any bets or anything?

SPEAKER_07 10:27

You just oh yeah, I had a fucking beautiful poem that I was gonna read, but yeah, read your poem. We had we lost the poem. I gotta find my poem about my dick. You gotta carry me for a second here.

SPEAKER_02 10:37

Okay.

SPEAKER_07 10:38

Um I had all kinds of great ones too. You guys really missed out on a great fucking podcast.

SPEAKER_02 10:43

Dude, I had some fucking I thought I had a couple movie ideas. But uh trying to fill in this dead air hold. How about a dick on?

SPEAKER_07 11:00

Give you guys a poem. Okay, let's hear this poem, dude. Some slam poetry. Slam poetry, okay. Feel free to snap along with me. My dick is whack. Teeth covered in plaque. My ass crack runs to the top of my back. But I'm rich, bitch, so cut me some slack. My dick has hair like Bob Marley, fat like Chris Farley, short like we man, it's kinda gay like he-man. It has weight problems like Biggie and a nose ring like Tupac. But it's clean cut like Diddy, and looks like Chris Rock. My dick has tits like yo mama, few like Osama, speaks well like Obama, and will put you in trauma. Thank you.

unknown 12:02

All right, there we go.

SPEAKER_02 12:04

Oh, I forgot we got a thing with the reverb.

SPEAKER_03 12:07

We got the reverb now. Hello. Hello.

SPEAKER_01 12:15

Black people moving into the neighborhood. Where are we?

SPEAKER_07 12:23

It's the Halloween episode. I don't know. It looks like Michael Jackson's asshole.

SPEAKER_02 12:28

We're in Michael Jackson's asshole right now.

SPEAKER_07 12:31

I'm slipping.

SPEAKER_02 12:31

Don't slip in the cum.

SPEAKER_07 12:33

I just fell over. I slipped on some of that cum. Can we get a cleanup crew for some of this cum? There's so much cum.

SPEAKER_02 12:45

Oh, there's corn. Alright, that's the uh Michael Jackson's asshole uh segment of the podcast. For this week. That's fun though. We gotta come up with some more bits for that.

SPEAKER_07 12:56

I just love getting in guys' assholes. That's so funny.

SPEAKER_02 12:58

I like getting in it too. I like the idea of being shrunken down in someone's assholes.

SPEAKER_07 13:02

Shrunken down?

SPEAKER_02 13:03

Shrunken down in someone's asshole.

SPEAKER_07 13:05

I like that. I think that that's fun. I think we could I think you can live down there for a little bit.

SPEAKER_06 13:10

You get a little, you know, you got a little bit of, you know, hopefully they got corn in their diet so you get some outside food.

SPEAKER_02 13:15

Yeah, that'll last for a while. You know, you could just eat off, live off that corn for a while. I always like to do that.

SPEAKER_07 13:20

If it's a hot guy like Jake Gyllenhall, I'd be happy to eat the corn out of his shit.

SPEAKER_02 13:24

If you had to like cast away inside somebody's asshole. Hopefully they eat a lot of corn because then you can just eat the corn.

SPEAKER_07 13:33

My hair's all long, my beard's got corn all in it that I'm saving for later because I don't know when Jake's gonna have another cob.

SPEAKER_02 13:45

Donnie, I don't get some gash, and I mean soon, and I mean real soon, I'm gonna fucking kill myself.

SPEAKER_06 13:51

Oh shit, Donnie.

SPEAKER_07 13:52

You're talking for the both of us.

SPEAKER_02 13:54

You're talking for bro.

SPEAKER_07 13:56

It's been six months since Carmela gave me a sweet slice of pussy pie.

SPEAKER_02 13:59

I gotta change my pants every 10 minutes, dude. I'm just leaking.

SPEAKER_07 14:03

I'm gonna commit a sexual assault on my fucking daughter if she doesn't, if my wife doesn't give me no box. I'm drink- I'm sleeping like a tree tap, dude. I don't know what to tell you. I just want to get all up and play with them fun bags again, but she just won't let me touch her. The big bisoinky titties. I just want to get them, but she just won't let me. They're all off limits.

SPEAKER_02 14:20

Well, Donnie, what if what if we just fucked each other? Well, wouldn't that make us fucking gay? Not if it's for safety reasons, you know. Well, if not if it's for the better good of society.

SPEAKER_07 14:33

I I guess I'd rather fuck you than my own. My own young.

SPEAKER_02 14:37

Yeah, but uh I think step two is we might end up fucking some children. I don't want to. No, I can't. I can't do that. I don't know what's gonna happen next, dude. I might black out.

SPEAKER_07 14:46

I can't go back on that charge again. I'm on three strike agreement. I only got two strikes already.

SPEAKER_02 14:50

I already got three ankle monitors on Oh shit.

SPEAKER_07 14:53

Shit, Donnie. We gotta run.

SPEAKER_02 14:55

I don't think it works that way. I don't think you just get multiple ankle monitors. Right?

SPEAKER_07 15:00

Maybe. If you got a real crafty prick, maybe you gotta have one on each leg. You never know. He's not putting one on a fucking mannequin that he's got laying in his back.

SPEAKER_02 15:11

Well, I mean, I just assumed it like there's the radius that you can travel and can't travel and then that's that.

SPEAKER_07 15:19

Haven't you read about these new criminals with triple ankle joints?

unknown 15:23

No.

SPEAKER_07 15:23

They just slide right out of these ankle. Oh, you gotta do your you gotta read about that, man. Really? Especially around the holidays, dude. I didn't know about that.

SPEAKER_02 15:30

I wasn't aware.

SPEAKER_07 15:30

Yeah, these these freaks that have three ankle joints. They're just slipping out of ankle monitors, and I didn't know that. Fucking wives, yeah. Yeah. One of them even came in and tried to fuck me the other night, broke into my house. Crazy enough, it's one of my buddies from the bar. But I I told my wife that fucking dirty Johnny, he he must have slipped out of his ankle monitor. He's that he's a triple-jointed motherfucker. You know that. He he must have been coming over here for some blood. I he must have been coming for you, huh?

SPEAKER_02 16:01

Is that like an evolution thing?

SPEAKER_07 16:03

I don't know. I'm making it all up as I go.

SPEAKER_02 16:06

I see, I see.

SPEAKER_07 16:08

I wrote down it'd be funny if a dude tried to play off his buddy fucking him in the ass is because he somehow got of his house arrest and he slipped out of his ankle monitor to fuck him and he wasn't actually a gay man. I fucking had to explain a bit, I guess. Sorry, I'm just I'm nonier.

SPEAKER_02 16:29

Listen, I'm uh I'm the kind of guy I gotta like listen through things multiple times before they click. I'm not I'm not that smart, you know.

SPEAKER_07 16:38

Sorry, I'm like cum drunk on Portillos right now.

SPEAKER_02 16:40

I feel that I'm a little high right now. I'm a little high right now. I had a bit for this one, but I don't remember it. So I just wrote down Mexicans clinging to your hair to sneak over the border. Like like lice or something.

SPEAKER_07 16:55

See, that's funny.

SPEAKER_02 16:56

I guess if there was any like at the border, you gotta like check to like, you know, like you know how if you go in the woods, you gotta check for ticks.

SPEAKER_07 17:03

You got like a fine tooth comb out. Yeah, they're crazy if there's any Mexicans a tiny little green, white, and red flag waving back and forth. Maybe it scatters. And then once they get across, they go back to full size. That's funny.

SPEAKER_02 17:19

Bossin?

SPEAKER_07 17:20

Bossin'.

SPEAKER_02 17:21

In the Ober? Bossin? In the Ooper? In the Uber? In the Ooper.

SPEAKER_07 17:28

Shout out Six Chains. Six Chains has fire bars. Check 'em out. Six Chains is Six Chains is getting up next.

SPEAKER_02 17:36

He's gonna blow up. Y'all don't know he's sponsored.

SPEAKER_07 17:39

He's a sponsor, we don't do plugs. He's the man.

SPEAKER_02 17:43

That should be our first sponsor of Six Chains, honestly. I already fronted it. Come on, dude. I'm sponsoring.

SPEAKER_07 17:48

And you really he doesn't even know about it. I just believe in it. I'm gonna sponsor him so we can pay ourselves. We're the highest paid podcasters in the state of America, dude.

SPEAKER_02 18:03

I want I like doing the Sebastian voice. Sebastian Voice is fun. You know, I went to this hotel, right? And I check in. I figure, well, you take it take a dip in the pool, right? I go to the pool, I said, what the fuck is this? I go in there floating in there, two dumps in the pool.

SPEAKER_06 18:20

Two dumps.

SPEAKER_02 18:20

Two dumps in the pool. I said, What the fuck is this?

SPEAKER_06 18:23

Count them.

SPEAKER_02 18:23

I go to the lobby, I said, what the hell? There's three there's two dumps in the pool.

SPEAKER_06 18:27

I grabbed the key.

SPEAKER_02 18:28

And they said, what? They said, no, that's normal. That's fine. And I said, What the fuck you talking about? It's a piece of shit. It's floating in the pool. Well, you mean that's normal? I go back to the pool. What's this? Four dumps in the pool. Four dumps. Four dumps in the pool. I said, This is ridiculous. So I go to the outdoor water park, right? Where? I go to the outdoor water park, the one right outside the hotel. The one over the overpass? The one over the overpass. It's right outside the hotel.

SPEAKER_07 18:50

I go to the-good family place, good deals for the kids, you know.

SPEAKER_02 18:54

I go to the kitty area because I like fucking children or whatever. So I go to the kitty area. You know, they have the little fountains right there in the water. You know the fountains that come up in the water?

SPEAKER_07 19:02

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Those are my favorite fountains.

SPEAKER_02 19:05

It's all it's all shit. It's all dumps. What? It's all made of it's all liquid dumps in the pool. Where's the fucking help to put it at the fucking the the fountain? It looked like it looked like fondue. It looked like fondue. What is this country coming to? What is this country coming to? I went into the lazy river. I felt like Augustus Gloom.

SPEAKER_07 19:22

You know, it was bad enough when we got that one president, but now we got fucking shit. We got shit shit fondue fountains. We got shit fondue fountains. Shit fondue fountains out in the fucking water park. For the kids. Where are the kids gonna play at? Let me ask you this, real quick, real quick here, water park. Where the fuck are the kids gonna play?

SPEAKER_02 19:38

Where the fuck are these kids supposed to play at? You want you want them to play in the dump water, the poop water?

SPEAKER_07 19:42

If it's all turds and baby roots floating around, let me ask you this. Where are the kids gonna play? Where the kids gonna play?

SPEAKER_02 19:49

I went to the fucking I went to the fucking hot tub, right? You go in there, it's all full of shit. It looks like a Coca-Cola.

SPEAKER_07 19:55

What the hell? We had somewhere we could splish-splash around and have fun like kids back in the day, you know? And then we got that one president. I'm not gonna say his name. My wife said I don't, you know, you're not allowed to say it. No, we can't say it. I'll get in trouble. But you know, it was one of them guys between Bush and Biden, but I think it's nothing we're talking about. But his fault. Now there's a bunch of shit in the fucking water park.

SPEAKER_02 20:15

Now there's a bunch of shit in the water park, it's in the fucking pool, it's in the fucking razy river, it's in the hot tub. I get out of the hot tub, you know what? I come out with a sunpan.

SPEAKER_07 20:23

They put it in a razy river? They put it in the lazy river. The razy river? The razy river.

SPEAKER_02 20:28

Oh my god, he's turning Asian. He's in the razy river. Did they put the poo in the raising river? Oh no. Oh no, healthy apartment.

SPEAKER_01 20:39

They put a poo-boo in the raising river.

SPEAKER_02 20:43

I gotta go and smoke a cigarette and crouch. What about if Sebastian like thought there were too many black people? He's never seen a black person before. I go outside. I see true to life, I think. Is that a bit?

SPEAKER_07 20:54

I thought that was just him.

SPEAKER_02 20:55

No, I said I go whether I couldn't see anyone. They had eyes, but I couldn't see the skin.

SPEAKER_07 21:04

Manuscalco at a haunted house.

SPEAKER_02 21:07

Well, what about uh Sebastian Manascalco, but he's obsessed with Vore. You know what Vore is? What's Vore? Give me a quick two-minute synopsis. It's uh it's this fetish where you fantasize about being swallowed and eaten. Oh, yeah, Vore. I do that all the time. You've heard of that.

SPEAKER_07 21:22

Oh, I love that.

SPEAKER_02 21:23

Let me tell you something. So I got a pitch for this movie. It's called About My Father, right?

unknown 21:27

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 21:27

It's called About My Father. Now, in this movie, it's about my father, but he swallows me whole. What do you think of that?

SPEAKER_07 21:34

Okay. I'm gonna I'm gonna need a little more outline here. Uh Sebastian, what do you mean by swallow? What is that? Is there what does that mean by swallowing me?

SPEAKER_02 21:41

Is there any more to the no, he just swallows me whole and I kind of just get all cuddly in there like a little cocoon. Um Sebastian, so I like the soft pitch.

SPEAKER_07 21:53

I like the idea, I guess, but how are we getting from point A to point B now, Sebastian? How did you get small enough to be in the cocoon?

SPEAKER_02 22:03

Well, that's the thing, is his mouth and tummy get big enough that he kind of just expands to the size of like a door and he swallows me whole.

SPEAKER_07 22:14

Okay, he swallows you whole. Okay, I think I got that the first time we ran through it, Mr. Mr. Man Escalko.

SPEAKER_02 22:21

Listen, let me tell you something. I've had this, I've had this recurring dream for years now. I can't get it out of my head no matter what to do. I've had ayahuasca, I've had ketamine. No matter what the fuck I do, I can't get this image out of my head. And it's this image about my father swallowing me whole. Swallowing me whole. And I think it's God or something that you know is something telling me that this needs to become a reality.

SPEAKER_07 22:48

Do you think that this is something we could resolve possibly by speaking with one of our HR representatives about some therapy, Sebastian?

SPEAKER_02 22:54

Listen, I'm pitching you a movie. I think it's a winner. I'm telling you.

SPEAKER_07 22:59

Nobody's saying it's not a winner, Sebastian. We're just worried about you.

SPEAKER_02 23:02

Listen, don't worry about me. Worry about the film, okay? About my father swallowing me whole. Yes or no?

SPEAKER_07 23:10

Well, I guess we're gonna have to be a strong maybe right now, Sebastian. We're gonna need a little bit more of an um of um uh conclusive outline, I think, from you is what we're gonna need first. Um, but it sounds like potentially you're just doing a gay spinoff of honey, I shrunk the kids.

SPEAKER_02 23:26

You know what? I don't fucking need this bullshit. I'm going back to my stand-up. Go ahead. You know, when I was a kid, we didn't complain about our dads molesting us. There were no kids going, this hurts, I'm bleeding, you ruined my life. You take it like a man, right? My father, you know, he had a real big ass, right? And I've always admired him for that. I've always thought I always thought that he had swallowed someone whole. And he migrated to his ass.

SPEAKER_07 24:03

Yes, yes, yes. So I think maybe the ther- okay, maybe it's potential molestation here with Sebastian. Um so something definitely, so we've got a bit of a writer's block here, eh, Sebastian? This swallowing whole thing.

SPEAKER_02 24:19

I don't call it writer's block, I call it inspiration, and I know what the fuck I'm talking about.

SPEAKER_07 24:25

Okay, Sebastian. I I nobody's saying you don't know what you're talking about.

SPEAKER_02 24:28

I think you're saying I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about.

SPEAKER_07 24:32

I don't think you know what you're talking about.

SPEAKER_02 24:34

I know exact I don't.

SPEAKER_07 24:36

You're exactly right.

SPEAKER_02 24:37

Let me tell you something, you'll come over. Why don't you come over here and swallow me holes? I swear to god, you fucking dirty, greasy Sebastian.

SPEAKER_07 24:48

Get out of my office.

SPEAKER_02 24:51

Okay. That was good. I like that. You wanna you're getting handsy?

SPEAKER_07 24:55

I know I'm just looking I'm just looking.

SPEAKER_02 24:57

Just looking?

SPEAKER_07 24:57

I just gotta know what's over there. I love it.

SPEAKER_02 25:01

Get familiar with the board?

SPEAKER_07 25:02

Yeah, I gotta re-familiarize with the board. It's been it was your week with the board the last time, so I missed the board. I'm fingering the board. I'm playing with all the effects. Playing with the effects.

SPEAKER_03 25:14

Playing with the big playing with the act. Alright, I'm playing with a big fan.

SPEAKER_02 25:20

So is it safe to assume that if we beep, that means the word?

SPEAKER_07 25:25

Oh yeah, it's the word. Whatever your word, whatever your most offensive word is what we want you to hear. Whatever the worst thing is. That's probably what it is. But it's not, because it's a beep instead.

SPEAKER_02 25:37

No. There are no Homer Glenn and they are not wildin'. You like that?

SPEAKER_07 25:49

I did like that. You like that? That was impressive. That was impressive.

SPEAKER_02 25:52

How about how about this? And uh a blind guy goes on a date with a retarded girl, and he doesn't know he she's retarded, so and he just thinks she has an accent. Okay.

SPEAKER_07 26:07

I'm in. Sebette, Sebastian, you're back. Well, what now that you got over all of this swallowing hole junk.

SPEAKER_02 26:18

What about um a movie about a blind guy that goes on a date with a retarded girl and he doesn't know that she's retarded and just thinks she has an accent?

unknown 26:28

Right?

SPEAKER_02 26:28

Genius.

SPEAKER_07 26:29

You like that six seasons now. Six seasons. It's called the Big Bang Theory.

SPEAKER_02 26:33

It's called the Big Bang Theory, right?

SPEAKER_07 26:35

That's what it is.

SPEAKER_02 26:36

Now here's what happens. Here's what happens. They pay for dinner, they go out, right? They leave the place, they start, they get in the car, things get hot and heavy, right? All of a sudden, her mouth gets to be the size of a door, and she swallows me whole.

SPEAKER_07 26:55

Seems like we've made it back to square one here, Sebastian.

SPEAKER_02 26:57

Sebastian, what did we say about the swallowing hole?

SPEAKER_07 27:00

You were doing so great when you were talking about the mentally handicapped guy on a date.

SPEAKER_02 27:03

We honestly much preferred the mentally handicapped girl on a date. That was so much better than what we're at now. Shout out Nick. That was actually Nick's bed. I stole that.

SPEAKER_04 27:12

Shout out to Nick.

SPEAKER_02 27:13

Shout out Nick.

SPEAKER_07 27:15

Um makes me feel like such a music shit.

SPEAKER_02 27:22

I feel that. We're recording. We're on the air again. Fuck yeah.

SPEAKER_07 27:27

Fucking hey, dude. I'm over here jacking my cock at Connor Bedard. We're supposed to be doing a podcast. Fairly legal, baby.

SPEAKER_02 27:35

Got money on that? Already paid.

SPEAKER_07 27:39

Anytime goal scorer, baby. First period always with this kid.

SPEAKER_02 27:42

Fuck yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_07 27:44

Um and now for you piece of shit gambling talking to we ever listen, you know, do you know who the Jersey boys are are?

SPEAKER_02 27:54

Jersey! I fuck their so fucking gay.

SPEAKER_07 27:58

Those fucking guys. Those awesome, talented men that you're about to tear down for no reason, you piece of shit.

SPEAKER_04 28:05

We love fat talk!

SPEAKER_02 28:09

He loves fat talk. It's crazy. That's like what somebody like the not who who else was like that that sounded like that in like the fucking 70s? The Beach Boys?

SPEAKER_07 28:19

Beach Boys were probably the homosexual tone setter of 70s music, I would say.

SPEAKER_02 28:24

Yeah, what is it with 70s music and the fucking high?

SPEAKER_07 28:28

I don't know, there wasn't many, but there's a few that are really questionable. The Bee Gees, too.

SPEAKER_02 28:33

I think we're doing some pretty gay stuff. Bee Gees are very gay. 70s in general are pretty gay. The fucking bell bottom jeans. I don't like those at all, dude.

SPEAKER_07 28:40

That shit's gonna come back, dude. You're shitting on it now. Literally, yeah, mom jeans.

SPEAKER_02 28:45

In four years men wearing high jeans.

SPEAKER_07 28:47

Yes, in four years, dudes are gonna be wearing high jeans again. I guarantee it.

SPEAKER_02 28:52

Wearing mom jeans.

SPEAKER_07 28:53

Because these don't, man. These dudes that are with a full beard. There's a whole new generation of guys that are our age that are like skinny fat and are gonna learn to borrow from the women how to tug that gut, baby. Uh and it's gonna be sexy boys in high jeans with fucking bell bottoms strutting around, dude. I'm telling you. Jack Harlow wears heels, they're all gonna start wearing heels, dude. It all it's really all in Jack's hands these days with white boy fashion. Did you hear the new Jack Harlow? No, I think he's kinda back. Is he really? I mean, it just kind of reminds me of a song? It's a song. Okay. It is, it kind of reminded me of the old stuff. It was fun, has a nice little bounce. Really? Um vanilla baby, which I don't know where I stand on that line. Where do you stand on that line? White rapper leading his song with on vanilla baby. Where do you feel about that?

SPEAKER_02 29:42

I mean, that's something Jack Harlow would have said already.

SPEAKER_07 29:44

I feel like it is very Jack Harlow. It's very I don't like how cool white guy it is. I don't like when white guys are cool.

SPEAKER_02 29:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 29:51

I really have a problem with when white guys are cool. I don't know why.

SPEAKER_02 29:55

It's like Haley's comment, though. You get one every fucking Who's the last real cool white guy? G Eazy? I wouldn't even count him.

SPEAKER_07 30:04

No, G Easy was the fake, the king of fake cool.

SPEAKER_02 30:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 30:07

He was so not cool.

SPEAKER_02 30:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 30:09

Is it is it like Eminem?

SPEAKER_02 30:11

It might have been Eminem.

SPEAKER_07 30:12

Tom Brady was never cool.

SPEAKER_02 30:13

Not like that, no.

SPEAKER_07 30:14

I mean he fucked he fucked the models for a lot of people. I mean, cool is in like cool. He got like a haircut, and people were like, whoa, you gotta hold it.

SPEAKER_02 30:20

I don't I don't think just being good at sports is enough to be like, it's cool, you know what I mean? I don't think it's the same thing. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 30:27

It's a bummer.

SPEAKER_02 30:28

It's a bummer.

SPEAKER_07 30:29

Donald Trump, he was the white guy. He still is the white guy.

SPEAKER_00 30:34

Donald Trump, do you think you can pardon me? Get me out of here, you know. He's womanly getting awfully thirsty.

SPEAKER_06 30:43

Is my Gemini twin. He's my Gemini twin. Kodak Black. Donald Trump, Gemini twin.

SPEAKER_02 30:53

And my Gemini Twin.

SPEAKER_06 30:57

Kodak Black's a fun one too. Kodak's my favorite.

SPEAKER_00 31:01

Well, I said Trump has one million dollars. I'll probably give Trump a million dollars.

SPEAKER_07 31:08

I love how Cosby can be Cosby and Kodak.

SPEAKER_00 31:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 31:11

Well, I I think Kodak's a little bit more like this, a little bit more like this. Whereas uh Cosby's much more rasp. Yeah. He's more like what if Cosby went back on tour, but he's like started telling like stories about the rape. Like like he doesn't get that it was wrong to do that. Like he kind of just did it. He kind of comes back about like the same way Louie came back. Didn't think I was gonna drug her. I said, you've heard the stories that you leave a drink over me.

SPEAKER_00 31:46

You should know better.

SPEAKER_06 31:48

I'm Bill Cosby, bitch. You come over to play, you're gonna go to sleep after. Ah, fuck, dude.

SPEAKER_07 32:00

Cosby's adult daycare service.

SPEAKER_06 32:02

Cosby's adult daycare.

SPEAKER_00 32:06

Well, you didn't come on. Just bring your wife over here.

SPEAKER_02 32:09

My bad. Fucked up a little bit there with the audio. Again. Amazing. He keeps fucking up.

SPEAKER_07 32:16

What if there's a box? You're going back. Five minute punishment in Michael Jackson's asshole.

SPEAKER_02 32:24

Oh no, not again. It's so dark in here, dude.

SPEAKER_07 32:28

Yeah, and you're stuck in here for five fucking minutes.

SPEAKER_02 32:31

God damn, it's so slippery in here. There's more even more common than was the last time, and that was only like 20 minutes ago.

SPEAKER_07 32:39

Yeah, I shot four loads in there because I heard you were going back in because you fucked up the audio again.

SPEAKER_02 32:44

I'm sorry. I'll make sure not to do that again. Well, wait a minute. Yep. Is that a dip? Yep, it is. Wait a minute.

SPEAKER_00 32:50

Is that a dip? Wait, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_07 32:53

Yep, yep, yep.

SPEAKER_00 32:54

Oh it's mashing.

SPEAKER_07 32:58

Ah, and he's out. Oh my gumshot. So I freed our podcast.

unknown 33:04

See?

SPEAKER_07 33:04

We are banned.

SPEAKER_02 33:05

How much more creative we can be with these buttons, guys?

SPEAKER_07 33:09

Endless possibilities, limitless combinations of gay things to do with reverb and a beep button.

SPEAKER_02 33:15

You know, every one of those women was lying. Every one of those women was lying. In fact, I go as far as to say that rape is a myth and it doesn't even exist.

SPEAKER_07 33:30

Yeah, Cosby's back doing his set again.

SPEAKER_06 33:33

Oh Jesus.

SPEAKER_07 33:34

Keeps ruining the open mics every fucking week.

SPEAKER_02 33:41

What'd you say? I blacked, I blacked out again.

SPEAKER_07 33:47

That was the best Cosby bit I've heard in a year.

SPEAKER_02 33:50

Got it. I just woke up out of another stupor again. And why is my asshole so tight?

SPEAKER_07 33:57

Tight.

SPEAKER_02 33:58

Or loose. Fuck. I'm fucking it up already. Why is it so tight? I fucked it up.

SPEAKER_07 34:02

You must have been fingering your asshole again in your sleep.

SPEAKER_02 34:06

I don't know. What I do is uh I soak my asshole in bleach. And what it does actually is that they you mostly use uh bleach to lighten the color of it. Is that how you get high? Well, it's not to get high, you could get high, but what people don't actually know is if you soak the asshole in bleach, it actually tightens up over time.

SPEAKER_03 34:24

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_02 34:25

So you could just go take, you could just take, you know, 15, 20, 25 dicks a day if you want to, you know, and if you just kind of soak your asshole.

SPEAKER_07 34:33

Drop this, drop that some suck in some bleach when you're done.

SPEAKER_02 34:36

Right before, right before bedtime every night. You wake up, you gotta you got it like a baby's asshole. It's brand new.

SPEAKER_07 34:41

Hey guys, welcome to my bedtime skin routine.

SPEAKER_02 34:45

So you're gonna fill the tub up with it, and you just kind of kind of crouch over and dunk it in there.

SPEAKER_07 34:52

And this is the most important part, and my final secret. You're gonna need to you're gonna need to get into a great position as if you're out in the woods with Winnie the Pooh and you're about to take a big old poop, you're gonna have to hunch over and drop.

SPEAKER_02 35:05

Just drop it in.

SPEAKER_07 35:06

And drop.

SPEAKER_02 35:07

And just leave it in there for like 10 minutes. You could, you know, you could go on Instagram, do a crossword, whatever you want to do.

SPEAKER_06 35:12

We don't have a little water. Yeah, we don't have a little water sound. Water sound would have been really good right there. Oh, I know it would have been my butt hits the bleach.

SPEAKER_02 35:24

Did you did you know if you uh count the ridges on someone's asshole, it tells you how old they are? Really? Yes, yeah, just like a tree, dude. Not me though. Not me though. I have no ridges on my asshole. It's just smooth and tight, like scar tissue, you know? It looks like a burned victim's mouth. Oh Jesus.

SPEAKER_07 35:45

Mine looks mine looks like a dude's fucking trachea. If I lean over the wrong way, shit falls out.

SPEAKER_02 35:54

You gotta hold it with your thumb when you uh when I walk around, I ask about my thumb and my arm.

SPEAKER_07 36:00

Shit falls out. Type of a fucking custom cork.

SPEAKER_02 36:07

What if I drank the diarrhea? Just Keith Ledger's joker like eating turds and his little fucking speech.

SPEAKER_07 36:16

Terry, where's my good asshole cork at? We're going to the zoo. Babe, I thought you washed it. Where'd you put my good cork? I don't wanna I don't wanna have to use the backup again.

SPEAKER_02 36:29

Is this what you're looking for? He just starts sucking on it like a ring pop.

SPEAKER_06 36:35

Oh no, not a ring pop. The Joker loves eating shit.

SPEAKER_02 36:40

The joker. What was The Speech in the Dark Knight? Have you seen that movie?

SPEAKER_06 36:47

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 36:47

It's been so long since I've fucking seen it.

SPEAKER_06 36:50

No, I haven't seen it.

SPEAKER_02 36:51

I wish I would have freshened up for the bit.

SPEAKER_07 36:53

I haven't seen that.

SPEAKER_02 36:54

I haven't seen any of those dork comic book movies.

SPEAKER_07 36:57

I don't watch those.

SPEAKER_02 36:58

I don't watch them either.

SPEAKER_07 36:59

They ruined Hollywood. It's all just every actor just stupid movies.

SPEAKER_02 37:04

I only like it because it's Christopher Nolan. That's why I was the only willing to give it a shot.

SPEAKER_07 37:08

See, I put on Tenant one time and I fell asleep in 12 minutes because I was fucking high out of my mind. So it's my isn't that Christopher Nolan? Ten?

SPEAKER_02 37:16

Oh seven. Tenant? Oh tenant.

SPEAKER_07 37:18

Tenant, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 37:19

Tenant, yeah. That movie sucked though. That movie was fucking garbage.

SPEAKER_07 37:23

Oh, I couldn't tell you. I fell asleep fucking instantly. That's what I thought about it.

SPEAKER_02 37:33

Ugh. You know, see what I like to do is I like to go to a there was a guy who liked to uh just go to concerts by himself and just be creepy in the bathroom. He's like, see, you know, yeah. But no, but no, in my head Hey guys, I'm doing a bit. And my guy, this is like a like a creepy, like fucking 50-year-old dude, like super skinny. He's like, uh, see, uh what I like to do is I like to go to a Con and Crows concert. And I uh I sneak in a grapefruit and then I go off to the bathroom. And then what I do is I like to have sex with the grapefruit. I keep it on my ass at all times. In fact, there's a little Mexican living inside my ass growing grapefruit. You like that? So I could have sex with him at a concert. What's his name? His name is Pedro, and he grows grapefruits for me inside my ass. So I could go to the Crow and Crows concert and have sex with the grapefruit. How much do you pay him? I don't pay him at all. He does it for the fun. He does it for free housing inside my asshole.

SPEAKER_07 38:32

Oh, the love of the game. Oh, they don't make him like they used to.

SPEAKER_02 38:36

He does it for the love of the game. And also I'll feed him, I'll give him a little bit of grapefruit every now and then. It's usually after I've had sex with the grapefruit. I go up to Pedro, I say, Pedro, uh, let me say, you ever listen to Counting Crows?

SPEAKER_03 38:53

I love Counting Crow. I love the Counting Crow. I love the Counting Crow. I love the Counting Crow. Tell me more about how cool the Counting Crow is outside your asshole. Tell me all about the concept, Kyle. You got X. I will keep the Great Fruit. I will keep a great fruit growing for you. If you just tell me about how awesome the Counting Crows are.

SPEAKER_07 39:11

You got how sometimes I always get them confused with the Black Crows, the one that Jimmy Page from Les Zeppelin used to do the guitar with the black crows sometimes. But the counting crows, hey no, no, no, no, no, no, back up better, back up, but I'm gonna change the crowd.

SPEAKER_02 39:22

I've been hanging it down to this town. Is that the song? Is that song? Sorry, I'm a good thing. Do that tickets to the Counting Crows concert?

SPEAKER_03 39:29

I love the Counting Crow.

SPEAKER_02 39:31

I could sneak you and the Counting Crows concert.

SPEAKER_03 39:37

I used to say, Oh, one crow, oh two crow, like, oh, it's just like that thing, the Counting Crow. And then I count all the crow and then I count and count and work. When I was in the grapefruit fields, I would listen to Counting Crows as I was picking the grapefruit off the tree. Yes, and then now and then now I'm just inside of this wonderful man Kyle's asshole, and I just have to keep the grapefruit coming for him. Keep it growing nice. Make them make sure they're fresh and ripe. He really likes uh I don't know why he liked the grapefruit so much. I would think he's more eggs by myself because I think he likes it. But you know, grapefruit, very juicy, you know, grapefruit technique.

SPEAKER_07 40:18

You know, we have lots of fun with this kind of stuff.

SPEAKER_06 40:21

Grapefruit technique. You ever you ever see this YouTube video?

SPEAKER_03 40:24

You ever see the grapefruit technique? The one with this very strong, powerful woman, and she sucks. She sucks a living. She sucks that she sucks the fucking life out of that. She sucked the fucking life out of a grapefruit, she used both hands. You see? She loved just sucking the cock the cock. See, I I I tried to do that, but my pee pee was too small, it couldn't fit the grapefruit in both hands on that. I grow such big grapefruit for Kyle that I can't even do this.

SPEAKER_02 40:46

I cannot do anything with actually Kyle said to make the sure the grapefruit smaller than usual so that when he fucks it, he doesn't think that he has a small pee pee. That way he's tricked into thinking he has big pee pee when he has sex with grapefruit at the Condon Crows concert.

SPEAKER_06 40:58

I know, and that's just why I make the money that I make to grow these grapefruits inside of Kyle's asshole, because I know how to, you know, I I can make a good custom size for him. If we get a crop that's too big, I can shave a little bit off the top for him. Or I can make it a little bit smaller, come next crop with through genetic modification. You know, I I really do a lot and care a lot about how this guy fucks himself with my grapefruit. Because I would just be some guy in the grapefruit field one day, you know. Now I have a I have a friend. Now I have a friend. I have friends in Kyle too.

SPEAKER_03 41:30

He's like my landlord too.

SPEAKER_06 41:31

He's like my landlord, and he just he he this this fucking guy, man. He loves grapefruit.

SPEAKER_02 41:36

So I I sometimes you take dick in the ass and I say, Hey, I say, hey, buddy, can you keep it down with the dick in the ass, please?

SPEAKER_03 41:43

I'm trying to get some rest. I have to, you know, hey man, hey man, hey man. You're knocking over the grapefruit tree? You're knocking over the grapefruit tree. I just planted the fogger, man. Are you planning the fogger man? Are you fine doing man? Mina Bell! Never see Encanto? You and Encanto, bro. Uh, I did think of this.

SPEAKER_06 42:09

Who's a madre, Kyle? Who's a matter, Kyle? I just blend the grapefruit yesterday, and you're already taking big cock again. Why you do this to me again, Kyle? You fuck me in the ass.

SPEAKER_03 42:21

This is you fuck my grapefruit. Fuck your ass. With the big cock. Why you fuck with the big cock all the time, Kyle? Dude, you're riffin today, bro. You're on top of it today. I don't know what my problem is today.

SPEAKER_02 42:33

I don't know. You woke up, bro, well rested, I guess. What about uh how about this? What about uh two and a half men, but instead it's two and a half ends?

SPEAKER_07 42:44

Okay. It just takes place where? In what in Baltimore now? Yeah, yeah, I like it in Baltimore. Yeah, yeah, come on. I gotta get my fucking loser brother out of my house. He just brought his fucking kid around, dude. Fucking piece of shit.

SPEAKER_02 43:05

Who's the half? The kid. Oh, I was gonna say Gary Coleman. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 43:14

Yeah. Yeah, it kind of sucks over here now that my loser brother won't get the fuck out of here, dude. Now I could do is bitch about the Ravens and call Damar Jackson a word all the time. And he gets bad about it because he's such a liberal homo, dude. All I want to do, hey, remember Flacco in used to do shit like that? He used to do just regular check it down. Good play. First down. Here goes Lamar, running all over the place, fumble. You fucking I just can't do it no more, dude. I don't even know what the bit was. I'm just a mad Baltimore guy now.

SPEAKER_02 43:48

Hey, hey, hey, let me ask you something. Let me let me give you a little offer. Would you like to be in a movie?

SPEAKER_07 43:55

I think that I've been ready, I've been cut out for the big screen, dude. That's what I've been saying. All the dudes down. Construction site, my dear. Good, good, good. Perfect. Perfect. Uh, let me ask you this: how do you feel about being swallowed whole? Well, you know, and coming to work with such a fucking idol of mine like you are, Sebastian. I just I I think our who's swallowing who whole. I'll tell you that right now. We this is gonna go one or two ways for you, Sebastian.

SPEAKER_02 44:19

I'm thinking you're gonna swallow me whole, and then I'm gonna get all curled up and cuddly in your tummy like a cocoon.

SPEAKER_07 44:27

I'm gonna tell you what, Sebastian. That might be the greatest fucking idea I've ever heard. I think it will be an honor to have such a classy Italian-American gentleman like yourself inside of my body in any fucking capacity you'd like, okay? So I'm gonna need you to bring that body over here and I'm gonna get real cocoony for you, all right, Bastion? Can I call you Bass? Don't call me Bass. Okay. Alright, I ain't gonna call you Bass.

SPEAKER_02 44:51

Treat me with some fucking respect, okay?

SPEAKER_07 44:53

Second of all, I know don't just do this fucking respect thing with me. I could treat anybody with any kind of fucking respect. Have you ever been to the I don't know who the fuck you think you're talking to? I'm a local 232 pipe fitter out here, Baltimore County, Maryland.

SPEAKER_02 45:05

What you're doing. And you're just a little fucking. Now open your stupid fucking mouth and swallow me. All right, you legend? Just swallow me. Are you willing to carry me around for at least a week?

SPEAKER_07 45:16

Can you withstand all them plates of wings that I'm gonna eat if the Ravens going at Super Bowl run this year?

SPEAKER_02 45:23

I don't think you know what the fuck I'm capable of. Alright. I don't think you know what the fuck I'm capable of.

SPEAKER_07 45:31

Why don't you just come over here? I'm gonna open my mouth real fucking wide for you, Spashin. See if you can fit a little bitch. Yeah? Oh yeah? Looks like we got ourselves a major motion picture in motion. Didn't think I could say motion twice in the same fucking sentence, did you? Motion, motion, motion. Motion, motion, motion. It's not about the size of my cock. It's always been emotion for me. I come from a real working class family of cock. It's not real, we're not real big or flashy or strong, but we're you know, we're that little white slot receiver that goes over the middle that gets you six yards on third and five. We're our our cocks get the job done in this family. Nothing flashy, nothing extra. You just get put, grab your lunch pail and your hard hat, and our cocks get to work, and we fucking, you know, we we do the fucking over here, dude.

SPEAKER_02 46:24

Well, I don't even remember what your character was. Was it the the the uh the half man, two and a half men? Yeah he's from Baltimore. Oh yeah, I don't know.

SPEAKER_07 46:36

It just became a Baltimore now. Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_02 46:44

Fucking Baltimore? What the fuck you got against Baltimore?

SPEAKER_07 46:48

Don't talk shit about fucking ravens, dude. Purple and black to a fucking D-I-E pussy.

SPEAKER_02 46:56

What what if you were getting a hat from a girl and in the middle of it you just went Wait, hold on, wait.

SPEAKER_07 47:01

What if I was getting head from a girl? Oh, that'd be nice. Yeah, that would be that'd be crazy, wouldn't it be? Awesome.

SPEAKER_02 47:07

No, but what I was saying is what it'd be funny if you were getting head from a it'd be funny if you were getting ahead and in the middle of it you just went boring.

SPEAKER_07 47:19

Are you fucking done yet? Come on, gosh. Are you gonna do a two-handed twist or not? Jesus.

SPEAKER_02 47:26

The Ravens game's on. Boring.

SPEAKER_07 47:32

Yay, who got next over here? She don't even know how to suck for fun, really. I had a friend in high school that was slightly addicted to Adderall.

SPEAKER_00 47:46

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_07 47:47

And I'll never forget. He came in the one day. It was finals. We had a math class together. He was drenched in sweat. Could wring out his t-shirt, right? Fill up a Homer bucket.

SPEAKER_02 47:55

Yeah, Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_07 47:57

He was just drenched in sweat, first period. Uh-huh. Up all night studying. We're dumb as fuck. Whatever. I was, you know, go through the whole thing. Oh, it was Adderall all night, blah blah blah blah blah. Come in the night. I see him the next day in the hallway. He comes up to me and goes, Yo, dude, tell me why I went soft in her mouth yesterday, talking about his girlfriend.

SPEAKER_04 48:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 48:17

And he's like, I think I took so much Adderall and then I saw a squirrel. Which is probably the equivalent of BOOM.

SPEAKER_02 48:30

She starts just crying. I'm trying my best for you.

SPEAKER_07 48:33

Oh my god. Well, your best just is it.

SPEAKER_02 48:35

Cutting it. You could suck me. Let me tell you something. You ever listen to Counting Crows? You ever watch sex? You ever watch uh Shrek 2?

SPEAKER_03 48:46

You ever have sex with an onion? You ever have a grapefruit? You ever you ever eat grape food? Do you like grape food? We got plenty of grape food for you.

SPEAKER_07 48:56

You ever get off when Sebastian Manuscalko comes in your fucking asshole, dude? Hey, bro! I told you not to talk about that.

SPEAKER_02 49:04

Let's stick to the getting swallowed whole.

SPEAKER_06 49:07

Listen, seabass. We're in business now, buddy. I'm a bit of a loose fucking canon guy.

SPEAKER_07 49:14

So I don't know why I just turned into you in the middle of the fucking bit. It's because I'm taking you over. I'm absorbing your powers through my cocoon, and now I'm Sebastian Manascalco.

SPEAKER_02 49:25

No, there's only one Sebastian.

SPEAKER_07 49:27

No, now I am. I absorbed you, you cocooned up, and guess what? I took that boy pussy, and now I'm you. No. You're not getting out.

SPEAKER_02 49:35

No, all it is, it's me talking from inside your stomach because you had swallowed me. You're stuck in the stomach. That's all that is. I'm not I would love to be stuck in. Oh no. Finally! Finally got swallowed.

SPEAKER_05 49:50

The man in the cocoon. Presented by Horrible Hang.

SPEAKER_02 49:56

I want to live like this forever. I want to live like this forever. Would you be willing to carry me around for at least a few months or something?

SPEAKER_07 50:05

Where is this? Is this the sphere? No. It's the cream pie.

SPEAKER_02 50:15

Alright.

SPEAKER_07 50:16

Uh here, Penero, Penero, Penny, Premier, Premier. Welcome back. Action news. Alright, action news, first topic. Okay. Would you go back in time and molest baby Hitler?

SPEAKER_02 50:31

Ah, yeah, I remember this one. Okay. Um. Probably not. Um, simply based on the fact I'm not interested in fucking babies.

SPEAKER_07 50:43

But could change history. Might not do it.

SPEAKER_02 50:47

Okay, but listen, imagine you get caught in the middle of doing that. And you have to be like, no, no, no, wait, he's gonna kill six million Jews if I don't do this. My time machine right over there. I swear to god, I'm I swear to god, I'm saving people. No, no, no, don't take me away.

SPEAKER_07 50:59

No, like and they're all just like, ooh, bah, cling, cling. Like, that's how they talk.

SPEAKER_00 51:06

I think fuck.

SPEAKER_07 51:09

I should have learned German in my time machine. I totally could have explained why I'm molesting this baby right now.

SPEAKER_00 51:16

Yeah, that's how the Germans talk. You no fuck, baby!

SPEAKER_07 51:26

It's a beautiful language.

SPEAKER_02 51:28

It's a beautiful language. Language of love, I think, is what they call it.

SPEAKER_07 51:32

It's some kind of love or hate, I guess. Depends on how you look at it. Love for a certain thing, hate for another thing. You know, never know. Half full or half empty. Do you does he maybe he just really loved guys with blonde hair and blues eyes?

SPEAKER_04 51:47

Maybe.

SPEAKER_07 51:47

Maybe he didn't really just hate Jews, he just loved guys like you.

SPEAKER_02 51:50

He could could be. He could be. Uh oh yeah, I meant to ask you. Do you did you ever watch like HD TV when you were a kid? My grandpa would have that shit on all the time.

SPEAKER_07 52:01

Yeah, I never watched it, but I like it's like osmosis. I feel like you just kind of absorb those shit. Yeah, you do. You never do. If you grew up with parents of a certain age or grandparents, you just like you just saw these remodeling home shows on Sunday morning. No, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 52:13

I wasn't like I wasn't like 10 years old, like, ooh, house hunters.

SPEAKER_07 52:15

But like you know, they always talk about Sunday morning cartoons, you know, huh? Ever hear of that? Or the not not shopping for a house with a$12 million budget?

SPEAKER_02 52:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 52:25

Seems a little bit out of the realm that we need to watch.

SPEAKER_02 52:27

Yeah, we're looking for a house. Yeah, our budget's around$55 million.

SPEAKER_07 52:31

They all work fucking 12 hours a week. They're like, oh yeah, well, conservatively we'd like to get a place around$40 million. Yeah, yeah. He's like a shipping coordinator for UPS and she works at the White Castle. You ever watch Property Brothers? Yeah, I've seen some Property Bros.

SPEAKER_02 52:46

Dude, when I was a kid, I used to like actually think they were gay, dude. I really did. I thought they were gay. Well, I turns out they're not, but like I actually thought that because my grandpa would watch House Hunters, and then like when the Property Brothers recorded over, because this is when you would have to VHS record, he'd be like, These fucking faggots recorded over my house hunters again.

SPEAKER_07 53:08

Their programs bleeding into my program.

SPEAKER_02 53:11

Keep your gay program over there. They were always together, so I kind of just assumed it was true. I thought it'd be funny if they did an episode and they're like giving a tour of the house, but like they have to keep sneaking away to the bathroom like every 10 minutes. They're like, Oh, yeah, this is the master bathroom with a view uh out the window. And actually, do you guys mind giving us just one minute? We'll be right back. Yeah, they're just like giving them. You just gotta go check on the water. You hear like, you know what? They've been in there for like 15 minutes. What are they doing? You just hear like in the background, they're like Harder Darren. I don't know what they're I don't know what their name is.

SPEAKER_07 53:46

But Darren's a funny name.

SPEAKER_02 53:48

They're for the bit their name's Darren. Fuck Darren. Darren, you're really ramming me. The woman's husband are like, all right, what the fuck are these guys doing? He marches over the bathroom, he slips the door open. He's just like, he's they're sucking each other's dicks. And then one, he's like, he already came, but the like cum is stuck to his cheek. So his dick is just like stuck to his cheek and he's trying to rip it off and he can't get it off.

SPEAKER_07 54:11

He takes like half his facial hair with it.

SPEAKER_02 54:14

There's like a string of cum going from his mouth to his dick. It looks like he just caught a largemouth bass.

SPEAKER_07 54:21

Jeez, dude, you haven't given me a shot of cum like that since After Nationals for figure skating, Darren.

SPEAKER_00 54:27

He's like, all right, on the count of three, pull one, two, three.

SPEAKER_07 54:33

Sorry, I've been really high on the protein lately.

SPEAKER_02 54:37

Really thick loads coming out of me. Like, they don't know that like guys can't get pregnant, but he swallowed so much commie's worried he's gonna get pregnant, so he's just like kneel over the toilet, like fucking sticking a finger down his throat. Like, oh hold my hair. I can't do this. I'm not ready.

SPEAKER_07 54:54

We can't do this again. That was you and your beard wife that had a baby. We can't do this again.

SPEAKER_04 55:00

We can't do it again, Dara.

SPEAKER_02 55:02

And then next episode. You're not ready to be a father. You're my brother, dude. Next episode, it turns they take a paternity test or maternity test. It fucking uh turns out they're positive somehow. They're like freaking out. They're like, I'm not ready to be a mom, I can't do this. I've um so I'm in the middle of my career, I can't do this. I have so many properties to brother on. What am I gonna do? I need your brother more property. And then I think at the finale of it, it could uh the finale of it, it's like they're taking like the pictures and like she's got the he's got the big ballet.

SPEAKER_00 55:36

Oh no, wait, wait, wait.

SPEAKER_01 55:39

They go, they go, move that bus! And they move the bus, and they're just fucking in front of the house.

SPEAKER_07 55:51

We're just having an orgy on the lawn in front of this whole nice family.

SPEAKER_00 55:56

It's like, oh, what the fuck, guys, take it inside! Get a room! Can't we have one week? One week where this goes off without a hitch!

SPEAKER_06 56:07

What are they doing over there, dad?

SPEAKER_07 56:10

They uh they built the home for free for us, son. Let these men do their alternative lifestyle.

SPEAKER_02 56:18

I I think at the end of the uh the season the season finale could be like he has the kid, and then it's like this beautiful baby boy, but then they take a DNA test, and it turns out the father is actually Sebastian Manascalco.

SPEAKER_06 56:32

Will you do do your thing?

SPEAKER_02 56:35

You see, you spent I think you spent a little too much time inside my inside my dummy.

SPEAKER_07 56:42

I'm sorry, Darren.

SPEAKER_02 56:43

I didn't know you couldn't just live in there forever.

SPEAKER_07 56:46

He was cocooned up in me for so long.

SPEAKER_02 56:47

I didn't think you had to be the father. I didn't know you could get pregnant by me crawling inside your dummy.

SPEAKER_03 56:53

He jacked off inside of my stomach for months.

SPEAKER_07 56:56

Shot the cum right in my ass, and now we have an illegitimate family. We're gonna be property stepbrothers. Property stepbrothers.

SPEAKER_02 57:06

I like that too.

SPEAKER_07 57:08

Uh fuck me. Property step bro, don't put property step bro. I'm just doing laundry. Stop.

SPEAKER_02 57:21

Oh, there's so much room in this laundry room for you to stick your cock in my ass.

SPEAKER_07 57:29

Look at how big this island is to bring your brother over and oh, it's so spacious.

SPEAKER_02 57:34

I don't gotta worry about hitting my head on anything.

SPEAKER_07 57:37

Do you see all the great ventilation? It won't even get real stinky in here when you two boys are going after it.

SPEAKER_02 57:43

And look, this huge window, the entire camera crew from outside can see us.

SPEAKER_07 57:48

Brother, we know it stinks when you guys get after it. But when a couple of hoghounds like you brothers get after it, you should know that your skin's gonna peel right off this granite that was finished with juice.

SPEAKER_02 58:05

Uh you wanna you want a little bet, I see, huh?

SPEAKER_03 58:09

One little bet. One little bet. One little bet? One little bet, yeah. Would you win again?

SPEAKER_07 58:15

Quick little hundred bucks. Pittsburgh steal was minus three. Over the packers. Fuck the packers.

SPEAKER_02 58:20

Fuck the packers.

SPEAKER_07 58:21

Fudge packers.

SPEAKER_02 58:24

Did you ever gamble on basketball or yes, I have.

SPEAKER_07 58:31

Denver Nuggets, minus six over the Mavericks about two days ago. I thought you were I thought you told me you don't really gamble on uh I don't really dabble in basketball much because it's regular season basketball is such a crapshoot because if a guy his feelings are hurt 20 minutes before the game, he's out for with an injury.

SPEAKER_02 58:47

Yeah, literally, dude.

SPEAKER_07 58:48

It's almost no play.

SPEAKER_02 58:49

It's like a dra it's like it is like a drama show.

SPEAKER_07 58:51

But there it is death taxes and Nikola Jokic being the best player in basketball right now. So I will happily bet on their Serbian king that the hates that hates the sport. I love dude. When they won, he was just like miserable the whole time. He's like, When can I go back home? I want to go back home. He's like, they were like, dude, the parade's on Thursday. He's like, Thursday? It was like Monday when they won. He's like, I want to go back and race horses. He literally races horses. No shit, really. Jesus Christ. How funny of an image is that? This fucking giant giant put. That's the only way to describe Jokic, is his body's a put on the back of a horse or in a buggy in fucking Eastern Europe. They don't have street lights, but they have seven-foot guys on horses.

SPEAKER_02 59:40

No, get back to the court where you belong. Get back to the court where you belong, man. Shut up and dribble Jokic. And there's Demars and Rosen with the two-porter, and it looks like we're getting a timeout. Let's take a break from our sponsor. Let me ask you something, Tim. You ever feel like you gotta take a shit and then you go to take the ship, but nothing comes out?

SPEAKER_07 59:55

All the time, brother.

SPEAKER_02 59:57

It's just stuck in there like a strip screw. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_07 59:59

You just want to reach in there and hook it, but you can't, otherwise, your buddies on a sports podcast call you gay.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:04

See, you know exactly what I'm talking about. You ever have to have your mom break out the old special spoon?

SPEAKER_07 1:00:08

Oh, yeah, I'm one too familiar with special spoon.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:11

Well, now you don't have to get your fingernails dirty anymore. The NBA is now sponsored by the anal extractor. You know, you bend over, you twist in the apparatus, and you pull the lever and boom. It worked just like a wine bottle opener.

SPEAKER_07 1:00:23

Finally, a product for guys like me and you.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:26

Finally, something that I can use in between takes. Back to you, Tim.

SPEAKER_07 1:00:31

I was Tim.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:33

I don't know. That whole every bit I write is very fucking not very well put together.

SPEAKER_07 1:00:41

That was a great ad. You like that? I feel like the anal extractor, AE.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:44

You like the anal extractor?

SPEAKER_07 1:00:46

Anal extractor. Uh we're selling adspace, guys. We anal extractor, uh, in bed.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:50

We're looking for sponsors. We're looking for sponsors.

SPEAKER_07 1:00:53

We're willing to do profit sharing on the anal extractor, the poop spoon.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:57

Yeah, nobody we need a patent. We need a patent that before somebody takes our idea. That's not a free idea.

SPEAKER_07 1:01:03

No, no free idea. That's ours. We that's not yours, that's ours. We own that. You stupid podcast listener. It's not yours. It's ours. It's ours. It's it's our intellectual property, cum guzzling idiot. Why are you listening to this horrible podcast, dummy? I uh I uh I think I'm gonna fucking fight the listeners, dude. Why don't you make the listeners so I'm gonna fucking fight them, dude. I hate them.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:29

What what are you gonna fight them over?

SPEAKER_07 1:01:31

Uh for listening to the fucking podcast.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:33

For our 12 our 12 listeners.

SPEAKER_07 1:01:37

Why don't you guys come out here and meet me under the big oak tree with no fucking leaves next Tuesday night, alright? You know what I'm fucking talking about. We're gonna square up, you fucking pussies.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:48

You know something? You look like you spit chewed up crackers on another cracker and then eat it as a topping.

SPEAKER_07 1:01:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:55

Yeah. What he said. Somebody told me somebody I know told me he actually did that. He would spit up crackers and he would chew up a cra a saltine cracker and then spit it out onto an unshewed saltine cracker and then eat it as like a spread.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:12

This is a real person. This is a real person. Are they locked up in a mental asylum by now? They should be. If I don't know what I chastise him for I don't know what I I don't know what's wrong with my brain, but I was like, if he says he spits it onto a Ritz cracker, I might be okay with it. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:29

Because it's saltier? I is it a texture? I don't know.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:32

It's something that you can't spit the same thing onto the same thing.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:35

So if you chewed up a Trisket and spit onto a Ritz, that's cool.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:39

Not cool, but better than better than fucking white on white crime.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:44

It's like it's like mama birding herself. It's literally mama birding herself.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:50

Which turns me on.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:51

Yeah?

SPEAKER_07 1:02:52

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:53

Some people are into that, I'm sure. I'm sure it's a kink somewhere.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:55

Oh yeah, oh yeah. My lady can chew, baby. She can cut through a nice grizzle. There's a kink for everything. Like the cut of that bitch's jib over there.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:04

Kind of like being swallowed whole. Did somebody say somebody's getting swallowed whole?

SPEAKER_07 1:03:11

Oh fuck. Here we go. Manoscalco. Sebastian, fuck off. Alright, we're not doing your movie. Can we not do this again, ma'am? We already cut you from the project. Your key card shouldn't have access anymore. There's no more whole swallowing movies going on. We get that you saw a glory hole on film once, and you just want everything to be swallowed whole now. Can you at least think about it? It's not gonna work. Sleep on it. I'm not sleeping on anything. You can sleep on it. The last time I slept on something, you stood outside my window and watched me literally sleep on it, Sebastian. I thought I thought somebody was sleeping in your tummy. No, you're not cocooned in my belly. There's not a smaller, there's not a same yet small version of you that is cocooned into any man, any Baltimore man, my man. No, you're not in anybody there's no form of you in anybody's stomach, Sebastian. When are you going to understand this?

SPEAKER_04 1:04:09

He's so upset.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:12

Crying. He takes out a 45, puts the cold, cold chrome on the 45 in between his lips, gives it a nice warm mouth hug. Eases back, clicks the revolver into place, and pulls the trigger right there. A beautiful life and death by Sebastian Manascalko.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:33

Oh yeah, I for I went to do this one.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:35

The man that was cocooned and trapped into a 44 magnet.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:39

Do you know the movie Train Spotting?

SPEAKER_07 1:04:41

No, but it sounds autistic.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:46

Which means I probably gotta work on it. Damn it. Okay. It's fine, it's gone. Uh I'll save that for next week.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:56

Save it. Fuck you, listener. Wait for next week.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:00

What about a fat girl that only dates Indian men because they view cows as sacred?

SPEAKER_07 1:05:07

Oh you like that? Oh, trying to pull it out. Have you seen Sarah?

SPEAKER_04 1:05:18

Have you seen Sarah?

SPEAKER_07 1:05:19

Oh, I just covered her so much. I covered her big, big pee fee. It reminds me of my Sri Lankan Prince Cow. The greatest shrine in all the time.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:31

I don't know what I'm saying anymore.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:36

Dude, you survive, you can't just say you hate.

SPEAKER_07 1:05:41

Oh my god. We're still recording.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:44

I know. Can you believe that? It slipped out again.

SPEAKER_07 1:05:48

Whoa. I'm really big on when I get home, and it's like a ritual thing for me now. When I get home and take a shit, I instantly, before I sit down, I just go, Alright, boys, tarps off, and I take my shirt off. Take my hoodie and shirt and just throw it underground and go tarp soft shit.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:03

Oh, you like it? Ooh.

SPEAKER_07 1:06:05

No, I I just believe that tarp soft lifestyle is a lifestyle for me. I think you gotta take your tarp off and let it all hang. Do you get hot and sweaty when you take a dump? Ooh, I'm just gonna do it. I do. I do a lot of pressing, a lot of pushing. Getting me hot and bothered over here. Sometimes I have to get my finger in there to clog the, you know, break the stoppage, get the flow going.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:26

Well, that's what the anal extractor is for.

SPEAKER_07 1:06:28

I know, but I since I just found out that there's a finally a product for guys like me, so now I won't have to do that anymore. My finger won't have poop all over it.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:35

Ooh, get the anal extractor sponsored by Robin Williams. Ooh.

SPEAKER_07 1:06:39

Um, and once I really, and once I found out Robin Williams was the main sponsor for it, really was final straw for me. I just won't follow in his lifestyle and kill myself, dude.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:48

Ooh, make a woman trust you emotionally and then use that information against her. Ooh. Whatever it is, tell her it's her fault because she's a whore. Ooh. Ooh, fuck that bitch. Like goodwill hunting, but he's a womanizer. Oh, fuck that bitch. Ooh, fuck that bitch. Have sex with her. Raw dogger. If she wants to keep it, that's on her. Ooh, and remember, infidelity. You can, she can't. Ooh, I'm gonna cover her and up pay child support. Ooh.

SPEAKER_07 1:07:15

Come over here, little lady. Spread them legs. Spread them legs, please. Come on, I'm Robin Williams. Spread them. You ever see me? I was the genie one time, right? That's who I played in that movie, right? I can't remember anymore, right? Is it correct? Could you confirm other Robin Williams? He played the genie in Aladdin. I think he played the genie. I think I played the genie in Aladdin.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:30

Can you spread your pussy open for me and put it let me put a baby? Oh, you don't want to get a fuck out of here? Get the fuck out of here, you stupid cunt. Stop wasting my time. Let this big genie get up inside your pussy, baby.

SPEAKER_07 1:07:38

You're gonna father a child that I'm not gonna care about. Ooh.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:43

All right.

SPEAKER_07 1:07:43

Or Big Robin. Ooh. Ever see RV? Ever see RV? Oh, ever see that one? That was a classic film where I played with shit. Kyle would love that movie. All right, you about ready to wrap it up? Yeah, we uh we can wrap it up.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:58

I think this is the longest one we've done. Long time short cock, long time short cock over here.

SPEAKER_07 1:08:02

Long time short cock. Ooh.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:04

Ooh, we got a bunch of bits going on over here. We got a bunch of bits. Fucking wait for next week. You're fucking gay. Gotta put the genie back in the bottle now. Ooh, gotta put the genie back in the bottle. You're gay. Fuck you. Fuck you. I love it. I love y'all. Andy hates you. I hate you, but I love you. Alright. This is our podcast. You're gay. Um yeah. You're gay. You're gay.