The Warrior Medic
The Warrior Medic helps men find, name, and heal the wounds keeping them from becoming who they were made to be — as husbands, fathers, leaders, and men of genuine faith. We start with the wound, not with religion, and walk toward the only One who has ever actually healed it.
The Warrior Medic
He Can't Receive Your Love — Impostor Syndrome & Marriage
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You've told him you love him a thousand times. And every time, something in him flinches. Pulls away. Deflects.
He's not rejecting your love. He doesn't know how to receive it. Because the impostor he's been carrying has been hiding it from him — and telling him he doesn't deserve it.
This one is for the wives of wounded men. And for the husbands who know exactly what I'm talking about.
Watch on YouTube:
https://youtu.be/3AXuAbjlBS0
Get Forged by Fire:
https://www.amazon.com/FORGED-FIRE-Victory-W-ANDERSON/dp/B0GL4XV985
thewarriormedic.com
This content is for healing, education, and awareness. If you are struggling, please reach out to a mental health professional or call a crisis line. You are not alone.
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Hi, I'm Bill, and this is the Warrior Medic. Today I want to talk to and for the wives of wounded men. I understand. You've told him you love him, and you've told him he's a good husband, a good father, a good man, and he either brushes it off, deflects with a joke, smiles and nods, or gets uncomfortable and changes the subject. And you wonder, does he even hear me? Does he believe me? Does he believe anything good about himself at all? Understand this, your husband is not rejecting your love. He just doesn't know how to receive it because somewhere deep inside he doesn't believe he deserves it. It's not about you. It's about a wound that was imprinted in him long before he ever met you. Here's what's actually happening. Your husband has spent his entire life performing, building a mask, proving his worth through achievement, through production, through never letting anyone see the fear underneath. And then you come along and you offer him something he's never known how to accept. Unconditional love. Love that isn't based on what he's producing. Love that just is. And the imposter inside says she doesn't know the real man. If she did, she wouldn't feel that way. So he pushes you away. Not because he doesn't want you, but because he doesn't believe he deserves you. I know this because my wife lived it with me. For years, she would tell me she was proud of me, that she believed in me, and we very often told each other how much we loved each other. And every single time, somewhere deep inside, I would flinch. I pulled back, and deep inside I'd say she doesn't know the real me. And if she knew, if she knew what was underneath, if she knew the fear, the doubt, the boy who was never sure he was enough, she'd feel differently, and maybe she'd walk away. So I kept performing for her, for my kids, for everyone. And my wife, this faithful, patient woman, kept loving a man who couldn't fully receive it, and quite honestly didn't know what to do with it. So I went to work, I paid the bills, and I avoided those soul bearing conversations. Keep it shallow was a motto that I lived by. And my wife, well, she felt the distance. She felt estranged, and she felt that maybe, just maybe, he's not being honest with me. If you're that wife right now, I want you to hear something important. This is not about you. His inability to receive your love, or at least not fully receive your love, is not a reflection of you or your love. It's a reflection of a wound he's been carrying since long before you met him. The imposter syndrome that drives him at work follows him home. The same voice that says, You don't belong in that boardroom, screams, you don't deserve this woman. You don't deserve this family, and one day they'll figure it out and leave you. Your love isn't the problem, the wound is the problem. And to the husband watching this, your wife's love is real. It's not based on your performance, it's not contingent upon your achievements. She sees something in you that the imposter you're carrying has been hiding from you and telling you it doesn't exist. The healing starts when you stop performing for her and start letting her actually see you, the deeper you. Keeping your wife in the shallow waters of your life ultimately leads you to looking for cheap imitations of that relationship. It focuses on friends, work, anything that keeps you in safe waters. I documented my journey and my wife's patience through it all and forged by fire. It's the story of what it cost a marriage when a man wears a mask and what becomes possible when he finally takes that mask off. The link is below. And if this is hitting close to home, subscribe and hit the like button. There's more coming and you don't want to miss it. And if you're a parent of married children, send this to them and be there to help them if they need it. And remember, we're all becoming warrior medics. So reach back and help someone on their journey. I'm Bill, and this is the Warrior Medic. No Man Left Behind.