S3E5 Social Media Addiction

If you just go through life “going with the flow,” you might end up somewhere you never even wanted to be. It’s better to live intentionally — make your own big decisions, and save the “go with the flow” mindset for smaller things.

What matters most is not how much other people like you, but how much you genuinely like yourself.

Don’t confuse looking happy online with actually being happy in real life. An “Instagram happy” life and a truly happy life are not always the same thing. Don't get fooled and don't fool others.

Chasing people’s approval is like drinking salty water — the more you chase it, the emptier you feel. You’ll never fully satisfy that need.

If you don’t take charge of your own life, someone else will. This especially happens to people who are easily influenced and keep changing their decisions based on whoever they talked to last.

A great habit is spending a few minutes every night reflecting on your day:

What made you feel good, and why?

What made you feel bad, and why?

What can you do tomorrow to make your day better?

Every few months, take a step back and honestly ask yourself if your life is moving in the direction you want. Don’t just drift — live with purpose.

Surround yourself with people whose lives inspire you, and be careful around people whose lifestyle or mindset pulls you in the wrong direction. Prevention is always easier than fixing damage later.

Stay curious, ask questions, and keep learning — but get advice from people who actually know what they’re talking about. Not every opinion deserves equal value, especially from someone who lacks knowledge or experience in that area.

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:03

Welcome to Life Workshop, where we discuss the forgotten basics. The topic of the this session is um social media addiction. And my guest speaker is this young man, Trenton. Hello. Hi. And then Trenton, can you tell us you picked this subject up and you know why did you do that?

SPEAKER_00 0:26

Yeah, no, uh, one of the main reasons I wanted to touch kind of on this subject of things is we live in a world where digitally we are um like digitally speaking, we are at a revolution where it's at an all-time high, whether it's like TikTok, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, stuff like that. And I personally find that a lot of us tend to have too much screen time in the world and we're not able to actually do those hobbies that are outside. And we get so tunnel visioned in the social media that we kind of lose who we are as a person. So that's it's kind of why I wanted to approach this subject in a sense of things, because um, yeah, I think I think there's healthy ways to healthier ways to go about it than what we are doing currently. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:11

So just I should mention here that first of all, Trenton is a few years younger than me. So I'm young, but he's younger. So I really wanted to see his perspective. Yeah. Um, one more thing as a disclaimer that I should say, you know, in this podcast, normally uh basically we discuss basic stuff. And this the topic, if you want to be honest, is not addiction that we are handling. We are talking about bad behaviors. Because if really it's serious way, and in a uh medical term, for example, it wants to be addiction, is out of our scope. We are not a specialist in this field and we are not gonna act like one. Addiction, normally, to best of my knowledge, is that when the brain is wired differently, and uh those individuals that they are addicted, you know, it responds completely different. And you know, they basically the joy that they get from this kind of thing is multiplied, and because of that, they can't get over it. So, anyways, um so it is out of our scope. If somebody's really done, they need, you know, they need somebody else that is professional in that field. However, I believe I would say 80, 90% of the time, when we are talking about people that they call themselves addicted to social media, really are not addicted. It's just a bad behavior. And one more thing, to the best of my knowledge, even the ones that they are addicted for real, that the brain is wired differently, even in that case, addiction is a way that they are trying to solve a problem or mask a problem. And you know, honestly, if we can prevent and be the way of thinking that we can prevent to have a problem, then probably they don't get addicted too. That is my guess. Again, I'm not a professional in this field, but if I researched it, and yes, if it is an answer to solve a problem, if the problem is not existing, then then or they can solve it in different ways. Even people who whose brain is wired differently, the chances are higher. I'm guessing that they may not get addicted. So anyway, that aside, let's go back to what we talked about. And as a general rule, again, I believe in rule of 2080 that 20% of the effort addresses 80% of the you know benefits that we get. And if uh in this case, again, I said most of the people, if they in a lay language they say that I'm addicted, really are not addicted, they are just yeah, they're not paying attention. And with some of the stuff that we are going to discuss here, I'm hoping that it can help them to again first to prevent it. I really believe in prevention, and second thing if really be considered treatment to treat it. But uh anyway, so originally I had asked Trenton because he knows more younger people than I do, but to go and do some investigation that why the first thing is because normally again I'm gonna make uh the way uh my brain works like this is diagnosis than treatment. And then prevention is more important than treatment, but first let's see the diagnosis that why people they get used to or lay language addicted to social media. What has been your findings?

SPEAKER_00 4:53

Oh, so yeah, what I found was um, like when I asked around with my friends or colleagues and stuff like that, of people are kind of around my age. I'm I'm 25 years old, right? So I kind of when I was in high school, I kind of got introduced to social media, like right when in high school came around. That's when social media started to boom, right? You got like those uh Snapchat, Instagram, TikTok, uh Twitter stuff that I was talking about prior, even Facebook, right? And so what I found is there's this sort of dopamine rush that comes with social media, right? Um, when you're posting on Instagram and stuff like that, and you get all these likes and these comments and you get all these notifications popping up, it makes you feel like you're popular, it gives you the kind of that high, that dopamine rush where kind of like where you're some people call a runner's high, right? And so they get this uh feeling where they feel wanted, feel um like so wanted overall. And so even when it comes to like TikTok and stuff like that, you see these videos, you see these funny videos, and you kind of get addicted, you kind of lose track of time. You're just swiping on your phone, keep swiping, and all of a sudden two hours has gone past, and you haven't done anything productive than just swiping on your phone, right?

SPEAKER_02 6:05

But you're mentioned that when you say that, you it's about people who post and they get the likes, yes, versus the one who is just swiping, yes, yes, right.

SPEAKER_00 6:16

And so there's there's two different sides of it too, right? Like so the way you said there's people who are posting getting these likes and comments and stuff like that. And to be fair, I'm kind of when I was in high school and you post on Instagram, and then all of a sudden you get like you first crack like the 100 likes, you're like, holy cow, this is insane. There's like a I don't even know the hundred people that are actually liking this. There's maybe like 20 people who I know that like my stuff, and then these random people are just like commenting and liking on my posts, and it's like that feeling kind of felt really good and felt justified about certain things, right?

SPEAKER_02 6:45

So, do you trust that then they say they like it? Really, they like it though?

SPEAKER_00 6:49

See, uh, that's that's a good question, right? And um, some could be lying, some could be telling the truth, right? And but that feeling of someone saying it, whether it's truth or not, kind of gives you that rush, you know.

SPEAKER_02 7:02

So and then are the negative comments, sorry. Sorry, what did you say? Are there any negative comments? If that happens, how do they feel about that?

SPEAKER_00 7:12

So, with the negative comments, um, some of them do hurt. Um, I did ask one person, they they do get some negative comments every once in a while, right? And stuff like that. And it hurts them in the sense of things like they obviously they want some people to like them, right? They want them to like the post, they like to, they don't want any negative comments. So if they see a negative comment saying, Oh, well, that hair color doesn't suit you, right? Then maybe they'll change the hair color to justify that comment. And maybe they'll be like, oh, this person will turn around and then justify me for changing my hair from blonde to brunette, per se, right? So then they'll try to accommodate for someone else's feelings on how they look, right? And I I think you'd look beautiful any way you are, whether you're blonde or brunette, right? So it's just how you feel personally, not not what this random person thinks of you, right?

SPEAKER_02 8:02

So how many likes would they give them, would it give them that feeling? Because the first time a hundred seems too many. And yeah, would it say that number or the next one they want from 50 to 100?

SPEAKER_00 8:16

Well, the numbers that they were getting were around the 1500 to 2000 marker, right? So that's that's even more than I I could have ever hoped to get if I were ever to post on social media, right? Like I personally, now where I'm 25, um, I don't post anything on Instagram or stuff like that. It's I I like to keep my private life kind of separate in a sense of things, right? I don't need the whole world knowing my relationship or what I'm doing in my life and stuff like that. And but for me, like how it works with new social media and why it's kind of addicting me is there's friends that I have that like we aren't kind of in contact as much as we probably could be. And so when they post on Instagram or stuff like that or Facebook, and then I run across their posts and I get to see what they're doing, then it's like, wow, these guys are doing fantastic in their lives. I'm happy with them. And then I'll shoot them a message being like, hey, that's like you just bought your house, that's cool. Like, uh, when when can I come down and visit you? Kind of all that sense of thing. So you kind of get that grasp of where they are in their life, right?

SPEAKER_02 9:17

So one thing that I want to mention, you know, it's just like a I enormous say it's like a drinking salty water. When you drink, then you want to drink more, and then it's just more. So at the beginning you're happy with 100 likes, then after that, you wanted 200, then it just keeps going. Now, if one day you get only, for example, it reaches to a thousand, then you get 500, then you say what does it mean? See that happened?

SPEAKER_00 9:42

Yeah, that's a big thing too, right? And then so I did ask them about that. So when you get like these 2,000 likes in this post, and all of a sudden they go, they fall down to maybe let's say below a thousand, that hurts them, right? That it feels like, oh god, what am I doing wrong? Right, all these people were like my post previously, and now I just dropped over a thousand likes. Like, oh no.

SPEAKER_02 10:02

I have some issues with that, you know. I'll I'll get to this and because I want to make it very realistic, you know, just want to be very practical. And even the one that you're talking about now is the people that they post, and they get the likes that they want. I'm sure quite a few post and they don't get the like, then it becomes really stressful for them. Yes, and then some are addicted, per se again, who are not even posting or they're not posting much at all, but are just looking at others, you know, what they are doing, watching and you know, following that. So why do they get you know so curious or nosy to you know about that stuff?

SPEAKER_00 10:44

See, yeah, and uh that's a good thing too. I hope I'm going on the right page here because, like for me, again, I'm I'm 25, I'm I'm still in school, right? And so I'm I'm trying to become a doctor or pharmacist, whatever the life path goes for me, where however the MCAT goes for me, and that'll decide my route on where I'm gonna go, right? And then I see my friends and I love them to death. I I wish them nothing but happiness. But then when you see that they're like buying houses or they're getting ready to settle down and propose and stuff like that, it can kind of send that things. Well, maybe I'm behind in life right now, right? And then it kind of makes me take a step back and be like, oh my God, I need to kind of pick up my game because it makes me feel sad upon myself that I'm seeing my friends succeed in life. And I'm so happy for them that I can wish nothing but the best for them. But then, like I said, it just makes me feel like that I'm I'm not where I need to be in life, right? And so that kind of makes me feel stressed, kind of makes me feel down, and you know, and stuff along that line.

SPEAKER_02 11:42

I think one big mistake that a good portion of people make, first of all, when they see something, they believe it. Yeah, they think that the whole life is that, but there are just uh Instagram moments you know that are put there and which often are not there. Maybe I should just say this. It just some time ago, there is this um lady. Um, she added me on Facebook. Then I look at the picture, she's really pretty. I say, I don't care if I know you or I don't, I'm your friend.

SPEAKER_01 12:18

So I quickly yes, confirm that.

SPEAKER_00 12:23

Oh no, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 12:26

Yeah, I mean I would but when I did that afterwards, I went and checked because the name sounded familiar, and but she's gorgeous, anyway. In that picture, that is what tricked me to confirming the friendship. Yes, but then I go, I remember this is you're not that cute. You just tricked me into this. Now I have I have become this that if I see a picture, I never ever believe it. See, yeah, yeah, you because and their Instagram moments, they do the best, you know, to have the right color. I mean, I'm not doing this right now. If I look good, it's just natural.

SPEAKER_00 13:14

Oh, you you look you look amazing, don't worry. That lighting is perfect on you.

SPEAKER_02 13:19

No, no, it's just real. When you see me outside, I have four 40 pounds extra. My nose is running, but I have proper lighting is just doing the job. Yeah, yeah. But you know, so this is the thing when we believe it. Or for example, a friend of mine was telling me that one of his colleagues um quit her job and left and went to I think Ireland and England, and then they said, Yeah, she's living uh she's been seeing the best of her life. I said, How do you know that? Oh, she puts a lot of things on Instagram and not Facebook, she's younger, but Instagram and those kind of things. I said, So do you believe that? Yeah, every week she's here and there. I said, How do you know it feels good? There are the pictures that they put, but have you ever thought that how she's feeling in the morning, many people? Actually, you don't know, you don't know, and she's giving you the best persona that she wants to give, but the real life, to be honest, more often is a bit different. Yes, so that is one thing, one thing, but in regards to what you said, that um uh sometimes you see your friends, for example, doing things and you think that maybe you're falling behind. Normally, I would say this I would say focus on what you're doing. Yeah, that's all. Yeah, anybody else does anything else good on them? Oh, 100%, yeah. But but focus on what you're doing, and sometimes, actually, again, there are Instagram moments, they do some of this stuff, and I hope it is good for them, you know. Don't take me wrong, but sometimes you have to take a different path at the beginning. You're not showing any you know growth of if there is a comparison, but you're making your basic debase, and then you can improve on your own. But again, focus on what you're doing versus what others are doing. That is, if you change that state of mind, to be honest, a lot of things will be prevented. Again, I'm repeating here I believe in prevention more than treatment, and in anything in life I do that. And when it comes to this kind of things, if the focus changes, you see that it doesn't affect you at the same time to know that often there are Instagram moments, and hopefully it is true. Yes, yeah, I'm wishing them all the best, but very frequently it's not. And I have watched some documentaries about this that you know, people that they are in millions, for example, for followers or something, that they just work really hard to make an Instagram moment, and then when they go home, they're not really that happy at all. Yeah, so uh again, it is and I'm not sure why sometimes we like to do that to others, we do it to others that I want to show that good time, yeah, yeah. Good time. I never forget about telling me that you know one of his friends had gone on a holiday, I think to Mexico or something in winter, and shows these pictures that he's gone with his wife, and they have an amazing time. Then they come back a week after she moves out. Oh but the pictures were amazing though, yeah, for that one week, you know. So this I'm not saying this happens all the time. And I'm not saying people that they do that are not truthful, but at the same time, actually, I really like the fact, for example, something like Facebook or the social media, that you can to a very good extent you know keep in touch with friends and see what happens. So that part of it is very good, but it gets abused when we go and just show our Instagram moments, when we fake it to show how successful we are, how good life is. So even because often we talk about others doing something wrong. I wanna turn the table and say that no, it is us, we do the same thing, that we have to be more fair, you know. Everybody has some hard times in life, don't exaggerate your facts, you know, and again we are looking at the moment uh so don't believe exactly what you see uh because it's just a part of it, and that part might be true, but it's not the whole truth. Yeah, that that is the very main thing.

SPEAKER_00 18:10

But yeah, no, no, going going off of the you saying that it might not be the truth, right? Because that's that's such a great good thing to say, right? Because then there's also those times where like when you have those younger kids, even like younger than me, like when I was in the high school age, and uh I said that's like a long time ago, but um like it was like you have these social media models, right? You have these uh superstars that play sports, like even for guys, it's not just for girls, but for guys as well. Like you see these supermodels that are girls, and you see how thin they are and stuff like that, and then you see the photos of them on the magazine covers and stuff like that. And to be fair, they are beautiful in real life, right? As are a lot of people, but the photos themselves are very much edited, right? Like we were going before, like the right light, they have the perfect lighting, they have the perfect photographer to take the picture, then they have the editors and stuff like that. So that's just the final product, that's not the actual initial image that was taken, right? So a lot of things were kind of mixed in there to kind of bring up the tip-top beauty that there is, right? And so that makes girls feel self-conscious about themselves, right? Like maybe their body isn't that figure that they that all these guys are gawking over, right? And stuff like that, or when it comes to guys and you see these guys who are ripped, right? Or these actors that are shredded, and you see them go shirtless on these scenes, and you see their like six-pack abs and stuff like that. And it's like, well, I'm trying to achieve that, and stuff like that, or people saying, Well, you need that to look beautiful. I put this shirt on because I don't want to show all of this. Yeah, but yeah, it's just but it's it's stuff like that, right? Where it's and then that's what I kind of gets you addicted because you want to have you want to have that perfect body, right? You want to everyone wants to be in that perfect shape where people will find them beautiful, right? That's what gets you those likes, that gets those comments and stuff like that. And so, but the problem is like your ordinary person, in order for you to achieve, you gotta have a lot of hard work, right? A lot of hard work, a lot of determination to achieve what you want in life. And so I'm not saying that they didn't work hard, those, those uh supermodels and uh athletes, right? But to be honest, they they had the stuff required for them to have it. They have like those personal chefs, they have those personal trainers, they have the gym that's with the team, right? So some people can't afford to go to the gym to pay for a membership, right? Some people can't afford to eat that healthy food that they're eating or buy uh protein shakes or pre-workouts or all that stuff that comes with trying to achieve that stuff, right?

SPEAKER_02 20:47

So Trenton, I think I'm I'm guessing you made a bit of assumptions in here that they have all that. I I don't know, you know.

SPEAKER_00 20:56

Well, see see that, yeah. So not trying to, I'm not saying that everyone has that, right? Like not everyone has those, right? That that is just the assumption that those like big, big guns have it, right? I'm I'm saying like that, that nitty-picky, like those, those like NHL superstars, and like that very small fraction of people who have I'm gonna yeah, if not, I'm gonna throw this a few things before I forget.

SPEAKER_02 21:19

I never forget. I had this but you have we are very honest, and he he he's a foreigner because Canadian normally say Canadians are too too polite to be honest, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:32

Very frequently that happens.

SPEAKER_02 21:34

But he's from South Africa, and you know, they're a lot more blunt, and I really like it. But you know, one day uh we were talking about this, and he said, he said, Mo, we are good friends and we have lots of common friends. He said, Mo, most people like him more than they like me. And unfortunately, that bastard is right, that's

SPEAKER_01 22:00

I hating, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:02

But but this is for real. He said, and most people they like him than me. He gets invited a lot more frequently to things, and they don't invite me. And this is this is true.

SPEAKER_01 22:17

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:18

But then I turned around and asked, okay. I said that is true. No question there. It's very obvious. But said that how much do you like you? I asked him that question. He himself, he paused for a moment, he said yes. He said that, and we know that he's a little bit of a people pleaser. That is why a lot of people like him. But when I asked, How much do you like you? His answer was five out of ten. We were trying to. Then I said, What do you think? How much do I like myself?

SPEAKER_01 22:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:59

A bit more than that.

SPEAKER_01 23:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 23:02

Because nobody else does, so I have to be there. But but the moral of the story is this when you say even those that they get a thousand likes and those kinds of things, first of all, like it's just a push of a button.

SPEAKER_00 23:19

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 23:19

It doesn't mean anything. Secondly, as it becomes like a salty water. You drink more, you want more. Now, if it became a thousand versus 1500, you panic. What the hell happened? But needless to say, my comment is why do you plan on people liking you to begin with? How much do you like you? When we talk about that changing the hair color or having six pack and eight pack or being ripped for a guy and those kind of things, if it is really important to you, do something about it.

SPEAKER_01 23:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 23:58

If it's not, it's not. This is where I'm going. That why shall we think that way? You know, and if you change that way of thinking, a lot of things just don't happen. Because myself, I'm not kidding you, this is for real. Myself, when a few years ago, when I said about this story with this buddy of mine, uh, that everybody liked him, to be honest, it was hurting me. It did, because quite a few times it happened that he would get invited to events, but I didn't. And then I realized, okay, what shall I do? Because I knew I mean to sit and think about this.

SPEAKER_01 24:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:39

Which I realized I have this one of these two choices, a kind of extreme thing. One is if I become like him, to start pleasing people, you know, saying stuff that I don't mean, and all that. I said, I can't play that role. I suck at it.

SPEAKER_01 24:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:56

The other thing is, no, I can stay the genuine me, and the few that they like me, I'm happy with it. And believe it or not, over time it has happened, and I realize, I should say, I was making a few mistakes that uh would piss people off. Uh, but because I was very honest with myself and I was doing that, I was showing my flaws, I started to realize that actually he never hesitated pointing them out to. Is it that body of mine? He never hesitated to point out you, you know.

SPEAKER_00 25:34

Well, see, that's that's a great that that's a great friend, though, right? That's that's who you want to surround yourself with.

SPEAKER_02 25:40

Exactly. And this is exactly, and because of that, I really appreciate his friendship. He was not shy to tell me, but I was very accepting it too. You know, I was not you know, shutting him down on that. Yeah, I would thank him for saying that. Uh so because of that, I realized where the mistakes are, or and I believe it's a mistake, I fix those. But some of them I state the way that exactly I am, and it never changed. And then I realized now I have a lot of in honesty, really good friends, quality friends. Yet I don't get invited that much here. And that hasn't been solved as much. Yeah, but so that's the sort of spot, yes. Yeah, I have to invite them over. Yeah, but anyway, so the moral of the story is this how much do you like yourself versus how much others you know like you. I think you spend more time with yourself than you know with others.

SPEAKER_00 26:47

And and I I like how you how you said that, right? It's it's how you feel about yourself. But like when we go back when you're talking about like that six-pack, eight pack, because as much as I do love myself, right? And and and I I really do. I I've taken a step back, I appreciate who I am, and I I like where I am in my life and I like the person I'm becoming. I have my I'm surrounding my myself around with people who also like who I am and proceed to the same with you, tell me my flaws, and I'm open to hear about because I I want to be the best version of me possible. So if I surround myself with those people who are being honest with me and not lying and saying all this other stuff. But the the thing that kind of makes it that addicting, right? I'm gonna go back a little bit, is when you're saying, why do people feel the need for someone to comment on that six pack, right? If if I want to have a six pack or an eight pack, I should do it for myself and not for the pleasure of others. But that feeling of someone complimenting that body that you did work hard for, is again that dopamine rush. Like when you get complimented on yourself, whether you're like, oh, your hair looks great today or stuff like that, whether it's being meaningful or not, which I do hope it is meaningful, but it kind of makes you happy for the like kind of the rest of the day, having that compliment, right? And so that's where it kind of gets that little uh not gonna say addiction, but like again, that dopamine rush, where it's just it's very nice to be complimented and very nice to be seen by other people for how hard you worked. And again, there's probably like that small people who try to achieve that body to have compliments showing up from other people. I personally would want it just to be make myself feel good, make myself healthy and stuff like that. And if a compliment comes, then cool. I appreciate it. But a lot of people, not a lot of people, some people want to have those eyes on them and have other people justifying that means, right? So that's kind of one of the reasons, right?

SPEAKER_02 28:37

The point that you made it was very interesting, which I strongly recommend. Do it for yourself, yes, because if you do it for others and it doesn't work, then you'll really be disappointed. Yes, yeah, you know, and um, anyways, I I used to date this girl that you know at the end when you know things were not going very well, so we broke up, then she said, I did this for you, I did that for you. I said, Why did you do it for me? I never asked for it. Yeah, the same way that you know she liked the fact that I was comfortable with who I am. I prefer if my partner I find her comfortable with who she is. Yes, and I don't want, I never ever wanted her to do anything for my sake, do it for your own sake. Compromising is a different thing, but you know, you don't want to go through, I don't know, for example, to work hard to do something to please somebody else. And then you said it is very good to get some compliments, you know. Trust me, you should do it, you will see what happens. When you do it for yourself, you will get the compliments. Yes, yes, and the compliments are gonna be sweet, but you know what? The most beautiful part of it would be when you look at yourself and you feel good, yes, 100%. Yes, I versus somebody else looking at you and necessarily giving a compliment, yeah. And then the compliments are just given so loosely at times, it doesn't feel genuine, yeah. Come on, yeah, I I don't believe you anymore, you know, in that case, which has unfortunately become very common that we tell everybody you're the best. I don't know, you're the most beautiful, you're the smartest. It's such a dumb thing to do, to be honest. On the surface, it might look good when we do it, you know, because I say the fact of life won't change. The best person, for example, the strongest is one person for a short time. The most beautiful, I don't know which standards we are talking about, whatever standards would be the most beautiful for a short time within a certain criteria, you know. Nobody is not everybody is the most beautiful. Now, for example, when you run, you mentioned about running. When people run, everybody gets a medal.

SPEAKER_01 31:01

Everybody's a winner, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 31:03

Seriously, yeah, and then what is wrong with not being in a winner? Is there something wrong with that? We are making it as if it's a bad thing, we are giving it a bad connotation, yeah. But no, most of the time, actually, most of the time, and we will never ever be best in anything, and that is just fine, yeah, as long as you're comfortable with who you are, happy in your own skin. That's all is needed. So a lot of it we are just depending on the outside sources to tell us who we are, some sort of a feedback, don't take me wrong. Feedback is good, a kind of a comparison to see that where you stand is not that bad, but they are just like a markers that you use to see where you're at. But then what you want to do with that information, that's a different thing. So, and some of this stuff we cannot change. This is another thing, for example. Yes, if you wanted to go work out and get six pack, first of all, six pack and eight pack is hereditary. This one that I'm talking is scientific, so you can have the strongest app and not get the six pack. Yeah, and some of these bastards they haven't done nothing, and then they have six pack. I hate them. Yeah, no. But uh, so again, at the end of the day, is just do it for yourself. And if the things that uh hereditary, you cannot your height, you cannot change. Personally, I'm average height, I have a bigger nose.

SPEAKER_00 32:49

I'm in the same boat, yeah. I'm about average, I got a bigger, bigger average nose.

SPEAKER_02 32:53

It's I don't know, my nose is bigger, just turn the other way.

SPEAKER_01 32:56

Let's say yeah, it's it's a beat to that.

SPEAKER_00 33:05

Yeah, no, I I get told, I gotta I gotta be.

SPEAKER_02 33:27

This is the thing. And then she was saying that no, you should go, you have money, go do this nose job. I said, No, why? What's the next thing I should do? If I do this, the next one, then the next one is gonna come up. Yeah, you know, I'm okay with that. But really, if somebody bothers them that much, go ahead and do it. But you know, uh, but you have to have it stop. That yeah, that's just the problem. That would be the first one, then there will be a second one. And then it just you never ever end up being happy with who you are. I'm never pleased with it, right? Yeah, yeah. So to be very realistic, some of the things that you can change, don't bother. The ones that you can, if it matters to you, do something about it. Yeah, and then so and there are a lot more important things in life to think about, not not the nose, not the height.

SPEAKER_00 34:19

No, no, not at all. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 34:20

Like and I don't know who came up with this standards that, for example, this type of a nose is better than the other. You know, honestly, even the concept of the beauty, or for example, noadays, when they say that if you're taller, it's better. You know, but the concept, all this concept that have been created, and I think a lot of it is done by um Hollywood, that they standardized beauty. No, some of the things that they show, even some of this beauty magazine, not that I get them, but you know, sometimes you see, I see honestly, they're ugly. I'm not kidding you. I I find it very unrealistic. No, they're just ugly. Yeah, sometimes they're anyways. I don't want to now say something, then somebody is like that, then they take an offense. But uh, we have different tastes. Yes, and then when we standardize those kinds of things, standardization is good for when we drive, yes, but not if yeah, to put something that on the taste, for example, oh, this food tastes good, this taste is good, that tastes bad. It's a dumb thing, or this look is good, that look is not good. Who are you to make that decision? And it has changed, and when we have, for example, this uh what do you call them?

SPEAKER_00 35:33

Then they dress this oh the uh you know are you talking about like the runway shows, like the the catwalks or stuff like that? Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 35:42

When they show, for example, this and now I forgot uh even the word for the moment, when they dress differently and then they come and walk with uh oh yeah, yeah, I know what you're trying to say. Yeah, it's just are you kidding me? Most of those clothes are just absolutely stupid, absolutely comfortable. Uh yes, you know, it's not practical to walk in them. Why?

SPEAKER_00 36:06

Yeah. No, I I would 100% agree with you.

SPEAKER_02 36:09

And don't come and tell me that's beautiful. No, it's not. You know, if you find it beautiful, good for you. Because somebody could be.

SPEAKER_00 36:19

Like you said, other people find other things beautiful than other people, right? There's there should never be a standard on beauty and stuff like that, right? Because my taste is probably different than yours. What I find probably beautiful or a nice looking shirt, you might think, oh, that's a little funky, right? Or stuff like that, or she's not kind of towards your taste, or they're not towards your taste, or stuff like that, right? And there's there should never be a standard on that thing, right? Why why are you saying that this is beautiful, but this is not? Like, why why are we trying to go away from like just let people let people admire what they admire?

SPEAKER_02 36:55

You know, actually, we we kind of drifted away from the thing. Yeah, we did, we did, we did. Yes, yes. I'm gonna blame you for that.

SPEAKER_00 37:01

Yeah, that that's that's yeah, I'll take blame for that. But so I'll kinda I'll kind of bring us back on track too, because so when when it came down to those bad habits with social media, uh one of the comments that I had was um that kind of was interesting to me was they didn't even enjoy it. It just became a habit, right? It's just it's just a habit to them now. They'll go home after they're done work, they'll go home, lay down, and then they're the person that would scroll and scroll and scroll, and then all of a sudden all those hours pass. And it's like, well, where did they go? You know, I was planning on doing this and this, and then I just got caught into this digital web, right? So that was kind of an interesting thing that uh kind of was brought to me with that thing, right? And I wouldn't lie, I I can't lie, I've kind of had that sense too. Like I was like, all right, today I want to do this, I want to go to the gym, I want to go after I'm done work, I need to get some school done, I need to go make supper or stuff like that, or clean my room, or just do do something productive. Then I get home, I'll shower, and then I'll lay in bed, and then I'll just swipe, and then all of a sudden hours gone. It's like, oh god, I'm not gonna be able to get some of the stuff done now, right? So it's kind of just like just again, a bad habit that sometimes hard to kick, right?

SPEAKER_02 38:17

Actually, one of the things um I would normally recommend is this, and actually you answered the thing that they really was looking for, that how does it make them feel afterwards? Is normally say this is a very good habit. I would definitely recommend anybody to do this. That every night when you go to bed, for a few minutes think about what you did generally during the day, and then how it made you feel. Uh if it made you feel good, see what was the reason behind it. And if really made you feel good, do it again. But it should be not at a heavy cost though. That is to be realistic. I went and I spent ten thousand dollars, I did this, it felt really good. Can you repeat it? You know, or does it make sense? So just to be not to go too far off. But the second thing is that what made you feel bad? And if it made you feel bad, think about it. What what was it? Was it the circumstances? Was it the other person, the outside source, or was it you? If it is you, it's easier to change you, but if it is circumstances or the other person, then you can make a decision. Do you want to handle that? You know, think about it differently, or change them, you know. So basically to have a better control, but as a general rule, I say I do recommend an intentional life. If people that they see with the flow, I mean for major stuff, a very bad idea. Because sometimes the flow is not the way that you want to go or where you're gonna end up. And I'm not saying that for every single thing, you know, make strict decisions, you know, that way. If you do that, literally you're an engineer. The engine engineers, they just have a loss of structure sometimes, and then they don't go with the flow at all. For example, you sit here, you're talking, sure, you know, you can go with the flow a little bit, but make sure that even for example, for this podcast, we have a structure we try to stick to. Sometimes it drifts away a little bit, sure, we go with the flow, it's okay. But we come back. You know, we come back. You cannot just come and sit and talk randomly, even if they are useful, again, it goes all over. So you have to have some sort of so intentional life is a much better than going with the flow. Then it comes, I'm talking to the principle of life, and the other thing Norma says that if you don't choose your direction, somebody else will for you. Yes, which again, I don't think is the best thing to do. Uh, so it's very important again to be aware that what you're doing, and by this thing that I said, for example, every night to think that you know how your day was. And I astoundedly encourage which person I practice that that every so often sit and think just the big picture of your life. Where do you want to go and are you on that path? But one thing I should say in here, because where you want to go sometime, for example, I want to have that six pack or eight pack, or I want to be the most beautiful, or blah blah blah. Norman essay. We all want, I don't think anybody is different, we all want to have a really good life. And if somebody's religious, they think about the other life, not this life, then that's a different story. Yes. But if somebody, most of us, we want to have a good life. Of course, we have different starts. I might be here, you're there, you know. We have different circumstances, but the direction we want to go is the same direction, and then time to time, we have to again review that are we on that path? And then my weakest thing is different than your weakest thing. There are some links that are the basic needs for one to have a good life. Then and I said, for example, for somebody might be financially they are very weak, that they may have to do that. For the other one, they may not have as many friends, for the other one, their health might be an issue. And even for other self, that weakest thing keeps changing because you overcome one, then the weakest thing is something else. Then because they say a chain is as strong as its weakest link. So to keep that in mind, that if you have a big overview of the big picture of life, you see what is your weakest thing and work on that one. This is where it goes back to things that pay attention to what you want to do, your own life, versus what others are doing. If you pay attention to them, you miss your own.

SPEAKER_00 43:33

And see, yeah, and so the thing is too, right? Where you what you were saying, and I kind of go a little bit back when you were saying, like before bed, and you talk about like stuff that made you happy, right? And all that stuff with that, right? And that kind of can lead on to this as well, where we kind of look back and take a step back where it comes down to like social media and stuff like this, and why it can be a problem with that stuff too, right? Like at night, a lot of people. would recommend that you gotta stay off your phone. There's there should be like no like no phones, no TV, no nothing before you go to bed. And because in order for you to actually plan for these stuff, you you need to think about beforehand too, like where you go to sleep. You got to make sure you get a good sleep or you're not gonna be able to achieve those stuff that you want to achieve. Right. Like you want to, we we like you said we want to go towards the same direction. But it's hard to go to that direction if some of the troubles is lacking due to not being able to sleep, right? And so we're trying to stay away from the like addiction side of like social media, right? Because and there there might be times where people there'd be like that small population that is actually very much addicted to it. But a lot of people it's common that we'll scroll on our phones before we go to bed. We'll have this screen time before we go to bed. And then all of a sudden for me I'm a person who gets overstimulated easily. So if I'm on my phone before bed and all of a sudden I see a video where I'm like oh this is funny. This is great. I relate to this then all of a sudden I put my phone down. I try to go to sleep. But now all that's on my head is this. And so how am I supposed to do that the next morning have a good morning wake up make my bed have breakfast then I'm gonna skip on something and then I'm at the end of the day when like you said when we're gonna see what what made my day better I'll be like oh well this morning I didn't get to do my morning routine I missed out on it. Why did that happen? And then it's just trying to treat that where we want to try to stay away from social media in a sense of things so we can accomplish those things because if we're wasting time scrolling on our phones or trying to get again that body that you want to achieve or try to please people instead of pleasing yourself well then you're not going to be able to reach that goal that you are setting yourself out to achieve and a few things that you mentioned for example yeah uh one is that a lot of this is change habits.

SPEAKER_02 45:54

Yeah you mentioned something earlier that for example for somebody who has uh uh uh absolute you know a really good body physique or something you mentioned that they have worked hard for it actually a lot of time actually is not working hard no a lot of time is just having good habits yes that is all it is you change habits you you develop new habits which are just will do the job so for example personally I work out five six days a week it's not because I want to lose weight or I want to put on muscle it's just a routine yes I do it and it feels good yes and the good feeling that I get from that is much better because you mentioned something that you know you compare that the good feeling from those likes like when you go to the gym I think are two different things though and this one I know scientifically it's different uh there was a specialist of a type that you know he has written a book about this too that is a different pie that you get when it's from outsource from outside thing that you're depending on it versus inside thing that you're creating it. Yes if you tell me how great I am and I feel good I get addicted to it then I want twice as much and and it is pleasure but if I look at myself and I feel good that's me with no and that means and that means a lot more than anyone else who's telling you about it right like and that's it it is even even scientifically they have shown that you know that this guy was saying that that would be pleasure versus happiness. Pleasure is a different type and if you your life is more of pleasure actually decreases your happiness. He was talking with the name of hormones and these things and they have done studies that if for example for the pleasure would be having a party then going to the other party then having this holiday then buy something new and then get a few likes do if people they live that way which I know actually somebody that is a kind of that way and I know the inside life as well the to be honest inside life is not that good at all not at all not at all but for Instagram pictures they're perfect and she does have Instagram pictures and moments that they look absolutely amazing. But I know the inside story it is far from it because it is for pleasure from outside I said this party this buying this new stuff getting some likes and all of that versus if somebody goes so it's a completely different versus somebody who works out on their own study have a conversation just like this they talk and really enjoy you know sometimes they take a you know bantering at each other but they really enjoy you know those things this is different than that this is from inside out that's from an outside in source. So there are two different pleasures uh but anyways back to the main thing when it comes to the social media which the addiction of that is no different than other addictions to alcohol to I don't know gaming uh anything addiction is addiction I don't think and some people they have more of addictive personality which means uh sometimes as we discussed earlier sometimes just the brain that is different but those people to be honest they should see somebody else uh but most of us it's just a bad behavior that we have that if we learn yeah sorry if we learn those no that's okay that if we learn how to prevent it again I go to prevention more than treatment if you prevent it there is nothing to treat you don't need treatment and for those would be be honest with your own feelings when you go to bed see how you feel try to change habits that I'm not gonna touch my phone and even if you somebody even is has an addictive personality change that addiction I have a friend of mine actually there are quite a few i i used to run a lot more I'm not running as much but uh that for example was alcoholic or another friend of mine that was a smoker heavier smoker and then they quit that both of them they are addicted they have addictive personalities though and then they're not just a different addiction of cheetah previous right they still they change the addiction to running and both of them are very good runners but they change the addiction and again it's an addiction but at least this addiction is not as bad.

SPEAKER_00 51:02

No that that's what I'm trying to say and and yeah so with with with that being said right even with this what we're talking about with social media right a lot of the time it is just bad habits right and and it's and it's like you said the way to to it's a way to prevent those bad habits and um so that that's that's that's the same I was saying where you try to stay off your phone before bed right or maybe you pick up like one of your friends who instead of drinking they picked up running right maybe instead of as soon as you're done working instead of going right to your phone you go to the gym or or you'd pick up a hobby that you might do whether it's like knitting or or like rec league sports or something like that just to get your mind off of social media just to get your have a little detox from it because you you don't need that in your life right like obviously social media has its benefits but it also has its cons. It has it has those problems right and it becomes that problem when all of a sudden you're becoming a different reality than what you are in in person right and that's when it becomes that problem that we try to prevent having now for we are going back to this so we talked about why people are doing it.

SPEAKER_02 52:16

So it's very very very important to diagnose it to begin with that first of all are you addicted which often I said they are not addictions are bad behaviors. Yes then why you're doing it that the why you explained quite a few of them.

SPEAKER_00 52:30

And and yeah and again so again I asked those questions because we had a little uh discussion prior to this of where we wanted to go with the podcast and one of the things was how to treat it like what what are what are different ways to go around it right how to prevent this stuff from picking up all these bad habits. And one of them was again just like define different habits but one of the reasons that they find it so hard to leave it is a FOMO. And I don't know if you know like that whole aspect like FOMO like fear of missing out right and that that's a big thing because a lot of people have the fear of missing out on the moments right and like if someone else is having fun they have they want to have fun with them. If they say no to going out to have a drink or something like that. And then all of a sudden they have a good time and they see it posted on social media then that gives them that fear of missing out right and it's stuff like that where it just knocks someone's self-esteem down because I could have been out there. I could have had a good time but I chose to stay in because I wasn't really feeling it. And then they get that terrible feeling and stuff like that. And then they become self-conscious and all that stuff right and then they're like oh well they have this good time without me do they always have a good time without me like is it is the nights better without me is that why they're posting all that stuff right and so again again it goes back to this that do you really believe that?

SPEAKER_02 53:49

Because they go yes and it's not as good as you know it shows. Sometimes they have their own internal instructions and even if they are enjoying it good on them. Live your own life one thing that I wanted to mention again in a very simplistic the podcast is becoming a bit longer than I was yes no no no actually it's good I'm I'm good and I'm hoping anybody who's watching it if they don't have the time to watch the whole thing to just stop and you know watch the rest of it because it is we are I think addressing a few things that are really really important in my opinion. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 54:24

But for example when is that to recognize that you're spending too much time that is one for example once I was I had this young lady as a patient and I asked her so how much time do you spend on social media oh not that much I said so how many hours because your phone tells you about five hours a day see yeah I said what is five hours a day exactly exactly then she said she said she said no but my friends spend more time I said you cannot use somebody who is worse than you as a as a marker that you're so great yeah yeah it's just and I I use this example for her and because I have seen that for example I have had people that they smoke sometimes I tell them you know that's a bad habit but I don't drink I said so does that make it better then the one who smokes and drinks then but but you know I don't gamble yeah and then there's always and then the one who does all of the three then so that but but but I work you know I'm not jobless or uh I don't kill anybody seriously you go find somebody worse yeah then to make yourself feel really good yeah is that what you're doing and but that's also that's also what I was saying though is like she didn't even realize like five hours doesn't seem like a lot right and they just get so lost in like that digital world that they don't even realize that's five hours of your 24 hour day people need eight hours to sleep.

SPEAKER_02 56:00

So of those 16 hours eight of them was working of those eight hours of free time five of them are scrolling on social media but she was a teenager she was not going to work but she was going to school but the point is that I said you know what we are talking completely two different standards like young yes yes and you may you may want to think this over yes and of course I should say this when I talk like this sometimes people they say that so who said that your standards are correct and that is very fair that is that is very fair because for example myself um my phone that says two and a half hours but no two and a half hours on my phone and the two and a half hours a lot sometimes actually is educational because I read I watch educational videos where but where are those hours right that's the thing it'll also show that it'll show where those hours are going yeah of course I should say I have a few years on her she was like 17 not too far. But anyway I know the moral of the story is this that sometimes the environment that you're at you know first of all dictates what is norm. Yes but when I say my norm is better than yours because some people question this so who said that the way that I live is better than that I normally say that look at the outcome I'm very outcome driven yes when it comes to food for measuring it don't yes don't take me off no I enjoy the process but the outcome you know did it work and normally I say that and for me it would be for that young lady did you get your schooling done did you do your exercises did it make you feel good are you happy with who you are if it worked for you spend five hours and more but the reality is not the case so because of that I'm saying that average is a bad average is very high and then she's comparing herself as if with some other people who are doing it worse. Every time there is somebody worse out there and if you want to feel good you will never ever be disappointed you can feel good about anything I just killed one person not ten yeah I'm not that bad. So these are so the first thing is diagnosis to recognize that we are spending too much time and then what do you do with this social in the social media if the social media for example is helping you to know a little bit about your friends and that is interesting but as well it's not costing you to lose other things then sure it's cool but but if it is above that then it's a bad idea the second thing is that is it difficult to fix this normally I say that like working hard to have a good physique or being you need new habits that's all it is if you change habits and sometimes for changing habits for me the way that I see the thing that has worked are two major things one is if you live a life with purpose that I want to get there then what others do it doesn't affect you as much because you're goal oriented to your environment who you surround yourself with and sometimes you have to change the surrounding but you can be at the same time you can be the person to change because you're the surrounding for somebody else sometimes we forget that we just blame everybody else but we forget that we are the somebody else for another person. Yes that anyway so not to forget that and then no you know and sometimes during this process yeah you may have to lose some friends which is alright it's gonna happen anyways uh and if uh those friends you know are gonna be basically not serving you and the friendship is derailing and drifting you away from where you want to go uh you may have to temporarily stop that yes and it might become permanent too doesn't matter you can make new friends you can the one thing I I try to stop it here but again I have a hard time I say a lot of things again it goes back to prevention there are some principles in life I'm gonna take it back because a lot of podcasts that I do probably I will come back to the same thing probably I will be repeating the same thing and it just sounds boring that you just said the same thing. Normally I say this there are three they call them I believe primary colors that from the combination to different combination give you can make any color I mean I think indefinite you know variety of colors you can make from this three basic thing I say in life is the same thing that there are a few principles in life that if you have them a loss of this thing that we discussed problems they never happen or they will be in a very they will not be that that hard one of them I would say I I haven't been able to formulate it completely but I'm gonna mention a few of them one of the biggest things is curiosity that if people they become more curious and ask questions for example that would apply to when you see an Instagram picture is this the real picture is this real you if you show a good life really most of your day is a good day you're showing me that one but how did you feel in the morning that you woke up yeah for the rest of the day how did you get to that point you know the curiosity and very genuine curiosity I'm not saying oh I got you you're lying to me not that you know but really the real curiosity and you can even ask you know for example people that they put those things on most often even the ones that for example they are popular and they get that thousands of life if you talk to them most of the time people are very honest they will tell you and you will say it is not the whole life is not that Instagram moment so that is curiosity I would say is one of the biggest things in life to ask more questions versus assuming things. The second thing is persistence so if you do something don't give up that easy with curiosity and there are studies again showing that you know intelligence or circumstances and all of that stuff they are not as important as regret for being successful then the other one again that very very important being comfortable with who you are and if you're not then can you do something about it if you can do something about it then do it. And if you cannot do something about it then don't worry about it. So this I would say there are very basic things that they will make a huge huge change there are and the base it becomes basis for a lot of things for anxiety depression I don't know jealousy uh all of these things they just never happen and they really believe in prevention part again I keep going back if we develop these behaviors a lot of the problems in the whole world just don't happen to begin with then we don't have to solve them the problems in the whole world and in our own life we create them or somebody else creates for us very frequently you hear people say why people can't be nice why they cannot you know live in peace very frequently because we don't practice this kind of things we impose our own ideas on others we don't ask them why they are doing what they are doing. And I'm not saying by asking their answer would be necessarily reasonable but again we don't understand it. So because of that the curiosity will solve a lot of problems and will stop a lot of assumptions which we assume a lot of things.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:23

No I think you like nailed that like you put right the hammer on the nail on that one it that that's probably the best way to describe it right and so yeah no I applaud you for that that that's that's a perfect way to describe it.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:36

To be honest and a lot of things a lot of podcasts that I do uh I should tell you this I have talked about this that there are lots of people that they podcast uh of course majority fail we don't know about them because they have failed yeah and then they're few and far in between that they have become successful. A lot of these topics that we talk about a lot Of other people who are a lot more professionals than me in any aspect.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:06

But the thing is, though, is going on with that curiosity part, right? It's it's amazing to hear different perspectives to gain that knowledge. Because me and you would have different perspectives than other people would. And then if they hear us and all of a sudden they're like, oh, I didn't think about it that way, that can help somebody, right? And I think that's the whole purpose of these, right?

SPEAKER_02 1:06:24

I think to be honest, one thing that I want to add in here, Tentan. One thing that I uh because sometimes friends they ask, why are you doing this? I have a very good life, to be honest. You know, I'm very happy with where I am. I don't need anything specifically. I'm not dying to have something else. To be honest, life is okay. Yeah, it's just fine. I'm content. Of course, remember, I have a few years on you, so that is another thing. But then the question becomes why am I doing what I'm doing? And I have said this, to be honest, one thing that I have noticed, I and I I have watched tons of podcasts, TED Talks. Uh I don't read as much, not too many books. I have started reading a little bit more. But often the biggest difference that I see, often people, the the way especially, they teach you that how to solve a problem from outside in. For example, you have social media addiction, develop these five habits, then do the entire 10 things. Which when they do that, it is like, okay, you told me these five habits for these situations, what happened to the other one? What about my other addiction? Yeah. You know, they don't address the main problem. I believe the way I'm thinking of life, those things don't happen. You don't have to solve anything because the problem doesn't happen to begin with. If you're comfortable with who you are, if you ask questions and you just don't believe whatever you see just randomly, you don't deny, but you don't believe it. You start asking questions. If you have persistence, that even, for example, you don't get a resist uh answer, it doesn't work. If you think that it's the right thing, you keep doing it, you'll be, you know, but most likely it will work. If there are a few things that I have written in here, again, if you surround yourself with people that guide you, that you want to have that life versus the other one. Very frequently, this way you can think about it. That you know, do you have the right friends around? And if you don't, go find them. Yes, then the other one that we say more often to say, I don't know, very important. Very frequently, we start talking above and beyond what you know, and we think that we have to act that we know, because if we say I don't know is stupid, actually is one of the most smartest things that uh that you realize that you don't know and you say it. And then a few other things that maybe two things that uh I can add in here, knowing that they say 97% of the things that you stress about in life, for example, it's a bit off topic, but 97% of the things that we stress about, they never happen. Yeah, and the other three percent we can't do anything about it, anyways. And one more thing, don't believe your thoughts.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:20

People they think they start thinking, and you know, they get deep into those kinds of things. Very frequently, the thoughts are not correct. And if you change the way you think, they almost say that the way you think dictates the way you feel. If you can control that, you can control your feelings. So when it comes to that part, when somebody says that, for example, yes, social media addition, oh, I cannot fix that, then you try to told yourself, so the chance of not fixing it, you're doing that. But if you say that, no, I can, and you know, I'm gonna do this. And I said, if you can't, then first of all, have different group of people around. Think why you're doing it? Is it helping you? Did that again sense of curiosity? Why you're doing it? If it's helping, can you replace it with something else? Even if you have an addictive personality, can you replace it with something else? That awareness on its own, it helps. And one more thing I'm gonna add in here.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:22

Before the yeah, uh but before before you do add that, I I do want to say one thing. I just I just want to thank you because it's been an honor and privilege to come on to your podcast. I I love what you're I love what you're doing with it. And I just I just wanted to thank you uh for giving me the opportunity to come on here with you. I I had an absolute blast doing this with you. I I think I learned a lot uh hearing different perspectives. I I love to learn things, right? And I think like you said, knowledge is with curiosity and just saying you don't know, right? Getting getting that different perspective adds on to the knowledge that you already have with it. So I just wanted to thank you and sorry to cut me off there. But it's really great.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:59

I appreciate that you came. And you know, um definitely we had a much better conversation, you know, that I was to be expecting, yeah, and very comfortable, and that's very good. But the last thing I want to say before I forget was uh no, I forgot.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:13

I'm so sorry.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:14

I I I I just I just wanted to get that over before you and I'm sorry that's I should have just written it down, you know, it was just there, I'm just gone. But again, at the end of the day, curiosity, honesty is the answer. It is, yes. You know, if we stay curious, ask questions, and again, we will figure it out. Uh oh, this was the thing I wanted to say. There was um they they went, there were two groups of people, one of them they went and told them calculate how many calories you take during the day. That's it. And they measured a few stuff, they left them. The other group they didn't say anything, they left them, they just measured some stuff. After a few months, they checked the group that they were told how many calories they hadn't said anything else. Allah saw them, they had lost faith. Even they were not told what to do. Remember that it was just create awareness. They didn't tell them how many calories you need to take. No, just how many they didn't say anything, anything, just just created awareness, just just how many calories you take, and then they had lost weight. Now, the when if we come with this podcast, again, a lot of time the answer that we have, the thing that we say may not be answering the question for a lot of people, and that's just fine. All I'm hoping that we have done to create that curiosity, yes. We express a few things with some suggestions, which I'm hoping they're very smart. That makes me feel better about myself, yes. You know, I'm hoping they find it you know good, but as long as we can I can create a little bit of curiosity if somebody is interested, they will figure it out. Yes, and there are lots of good information out there, a lot, in all honesty, and one can go on YouTube personally, I do very frequently, and then you will realize that you know you will find them again. There are lots of really poor videos too. Again, do those 10 things, don't do that thing, say this five, act this, act that. No, uh, this is the difference with the approach that I have, which uh there are a few people that they have done that. Um Morgan Housel is one that I have a lot of respect for. The guy who's the one who wrote the psychology of money. Uh uh, the other one is uh James Clear. I believe he's the one who wrote uh um oh my god, atomic habits, or the guy who wrote the book, I think seven behaviors that for success make you successful. I'm I'm not saying correctly, but anyway, uh those are the individuals that normally they are addressing the source of the problem that um if you develop those behaviors, if you make those changes, it will be like those three primary colors addresses most of other things, it will create you with a very, very strong base. And what I want to do with this podcast, I want to build on what they do, yes, to present it with a bit of an example on a video, and hopefully a bit entertaining and more educational, just to again create that curiosity, give it direction on how to think, you will figure it out on your own.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:23

Perfect. Well, thank you again.

SPEAKER_02 1:15:26

No, I greatly appreciate having you here. Hopefully, we'll do more podcasts together.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:30

Yeah, no, whatever. Reach out whenever.

SPEAKER_02 1:15:32

Um, and again to the viewers, hopefully that you enjoyed this. And um uh just for the Google algorithm, if you like it, if you make a comment, it helps us, you know, if you share it. So please do that. This stuff is fantastic.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:46

So yeah, we leave a like and subscribe. So he's he's amazing.

SPEAKER_02 1:15:49

So thanks again. So, and again, normally I finish my podcast uh with this. Life is simple, we make it complicated. Take it off.