Why Success Doesn’t Fix Your Patterns with Daune Thompson

Why do so many successful people still feel stuck, burned out, or disconnected?

In this episode of Behind the Story, Jelani Gonzalez sits down with Daune Thompson, speaker, coach, and creator of the Soul CEO and Lighthouse Mastery approach, for a conversation about success, burnout, subconscious patterns, alignment, and self-understanding.

Daune shares why she believes burnout is not simply about doing too much, but about being out of alignment with who you are for too long. She also explains why high achievers often keep repeating the same patterns in relationships, health, money, and purpose — even after they have built the life they thought they wanted.

This conversation explores hustle culture, emotional triggers, blind spots, self-mastery, spirituality, science, relationships, and what it means to stop managing your life from the outside and start leading from the inside.

If you have ever looked successful on paper but still felt like something was missing, this episode will give you a deeper way to think about alignment, identity, and the patterns quietly shaping your life.

Learn more about Daune at:
 ideserveitnow.com
 daunethompson.com

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

What if the success you work so hard for still leaves you exhausted or stuck? In this conversation with Dawn Thompson, we go beneath the surface of burnout, hustle culture, subconscious patterns, and what it means to activate the CEO of yourself. Let's get into it.

SPEAKER_02 0:18

And look at the reality you are in. Is it the one you want? Is it the one you deserve? And if it's not, just start understanding is where is it that you are attracting these relationships out of the wrong frequency and the wrong energy? And could you upgrade that relationship environment, situations, and or yourself? And the real the relationships will edit, adapt, grow with you or not according to the reality that you're shifting into.

SPEAKER_00 0:45

Let's talk about why some high achievers are not really happy. You know, what what do you think it is when people become really successful, but they seem to be empty, like something is lacking in their lives?

SPEAKER_02 0:57

So I have been doing this work for 30 years. So it's I've been blessed to have a journey of watching patterns. I'm a big pattern person. And it didn't matter whether I was in corporate America, in relationship coaching, private one-on-one work. It was always these patterns that I started watching overlap. And it it was strategy, right? And to high achievers, entrepreneurs, drivers, stay-at-home moms. It doesn't matter. Whatever we're trying to achieve, it's always leading to trying to apply a trap a strategy as opposed to soul alignment. And so it's always leading to burnout. And what I realized is burnout isn't doing too much because you can do a lot of physical activity and be sore, but you still feel alive and vibrant. But when the mind is overworking on things that don't work for you or your soul, shall I say, I found that burnout isn't about doing too much. It's about being out of alignment with who you are for too long. And so, from a science perspective, which I'm a kind of a science nerd, I have a physiology, kinesiology background. And so I had to take the body-mind spirit and kind of layer them. And when I looked at the science, your nervous system will always choose what's familiar, even if it's stressful. And so what I realized is some people stay in those patterns that exhaust them because it feels normal. And then they think the solution is to push harder when really it's to understand like what's actually driving them. And so you're not tired because you're doing too much. You're tired because you're doing what's not true for you.

SPEAKER_00 2:31

Are there any common patterns that you've seen amongst people?

SPEAKER_02 2:35

Yeah, we're out of alignment with our soul. And it's kind of why I've kind of been termed the soul CEO activator, because I'm having to reactivate our soul alignment. And we're not just a body, we're not just a mind full of strategies. We're we're body, mind, soul, right? We're we're all three layers. And so the commonality is that we've lost touch with our soul alignment of our blueprint of who we really are authentically. And authenticity is kind of fallen off the wayside, yet that's what makes us the most powerful, the most successful, the most peaceful.

SPEAKER_00 3:11

Have you ever because you you just mentioned body, mind, and soul, body, mind, spirit, whatever. And I believe in that sort of thing. But what if your your encounter is with somebody who does not believe that and they say, What are you talking about, soul? Like how would you address it?

SPEAKER_02 3:27

Well, because uh if you go from my nerdy science self, like the the the we're an energetic grid, even if you look in Asian, you know, science and culture, and we have thousands of years of, you know, energetic, call it your acupuncture meridian lines, right? This is a scientific mindset. So we have to start looking at ourselves as an energetic grid of frequency. And we come down as a soul. You didn't just come in as a body, right? And so energetically, we're here with, I call it life mastery, right? You came here to master some lessons, and some parts of life are gonna be easy. Some people are very good at money, some people are very good at relationships, some people are very good at health and fitness and nutrition in their bodies, and some people aren't in certain categories. And those are the commonalities is that we have to look at our energetic grid and go, oh, you've got a little bit of a boulder on that path. Doesn't mean you can't achieve the path. You've just got to master a little bit more, a couple more lessons. It's kind of like going, I I hated geometry, didn't want to go to geometry, but I had to pass geometry one way or another. So I had to keep going to the class a little bit more than someone else who may have been good at it. So you can apply it whether it's soul, whether it's it's energy, whether it's frequency, whether it's quantum physics. I don't really, you know, have a a specific version other than the way I look at life because we have to look at our energy field.

SPEAKER_00 4:53

So you sort of get them to connect energy to spirit, soul. So it makes sense.

SPEAKER_02 4:58

Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 5:00

What sort of uh patterns do you see repeating?

SPEAKER_02 5:03

Avoiding our insecurities. And and and so I I use the word insecurity lightly because again, it's that master class, right? It's the class that each of us have to go to. And, you know, I do a little bit more of a spiritual twist, even in corporate America. I train a lot of corporate execs. And, you know, I use astrology and not as a a crystal ball or prediction. I could care less what your predictions are or the tea leaves say. That's just not who I am. What I care about is understanding the patterns that you came to master. And the patterns that we came to master are typically what you're asking is is we avoid these four kind of massive categories, which is our blocks, our our emotional baggage, our bruises, something that hurt us when we were a kid and we're like protecting ourselves. And then the the one that kind of blows my mind is we avoid the breakthroughs, like this one category or area in our life of we kind of focus a little bit more, we're really intrigued, we're really drawn to it. We're actually quite talented there. But we avoid it. And so the pattern that is hands down, I don't care if you come to me for health, wealth, or love. I see the same pattern. It's avoiding kind of these four, I call them your BS spots, which stand for blind spots, right? Your hot blind spots that they get too hot to go into that room. We'll call it, I call it lighthouse mastery, but we call it a lighthouse, right? And there's these 12 rooms around you, and four of them typically are so uncomfortable. They're kind of hot. You don't want to go there because they might make you insecure. And so walking through that fire is what breaks open your entire reality to a higher level. So that's the same pattern. I watch it over and over again.

SPEAKER_00 6:37

Yeah, I remember listening to a tape. Yeah. I used to listen to tapes. I'm that old.

SPEAKER_02 6:41

I am too.

SPEAKER_00 6:42

And and and it was Tony Robbins' tape, and he said, you know, one of the most easiest things for him to deal with is people think their problems are unique and they're not. They're all the same problems, just worded differently. So it's really easy for him to help people. So what you said just resonated. Dawn, 30 years you you've been doing this. What led you to get started in this work?

SPEAKER_02 7:03

Yeah, you know, you know, when you you don't know as a child or when you're young, right? You really kind of just don't realize something is just in your bones, like it's in your genes. And into, like I mentioned earlier, like I get asked a lot, like, how'd you become the sole CEO activator? And I laugh and I'm like, because seeing the unseen and making it seen for people made sense to me. Even as a child, right? Like I spent most of my life obsessed with what's underneath the surface. And so even as a little girl, Johnny, you know how you look back at those memories, right? I remember I would sit and my grandma had this rock pile and I would crack open the rocks, and even the ugly rocks had these beautiful crystals on the inside. And it was like this innate knowingness. And so I carried that again, that curiosity into college. And I thought, okay, let's get into physiology and kinesiology as a med school prep. And thinking healing was going to happen through the body if we just make the body better. And then what I realized so quickly is that the body doesn't change until the mind does. And then even then, I realized that what people do, even though they still know what to do, they still don't do it. And this was a pattern for me. Like I was obsessed with deep, you know, really understanding that there's this deeper thing running the show. And so for me personally, how do you do this for 30 years? It got personal because everything, I built everything I was supposed to want. And I think a lot of entrepreneurs and business success, I work with a lot of very high-achieving, very successful people. And we all have that same thing. I'm supposed to have the marriage and the family and the the, I had the businesses, I wrote the books, I had the image, the body. But then internally, I was exhausted and totally disconnected from myself. And so there was this moment that changed everything for me. And I overheard my daughter ask her dad in the other room, how come mommy never laughs? And you hear this from a three-year-old, and it was like honestly, like it broke open my entire life of I'd been doing all this, it made sense to me, but I had to get honest with truth. And my health was crashing at that time, my marriage was falling apart, didn't want to admit it, right? My motherhood felt heavy. And I realized that in that moment, I needed to change me. I didn't need to change everybody else, not him, not my family. I had to change me. And so that journey moved into the work I do today. So now I help leaders doing what I did, which is I've created it all. I've got all the money, all the houses, all the things, all the family, right? And I'm still stuck and burnt out. And so they were repeating that same story, the same different costume, different drama. And so how I got here was I give them the manual to their soul so that they can excel in wealth, health, and love without compromising burnout, but you can have all. And I think people compromise and think if I have this success, I can't have that. If I only have love, or if I only have health, but I can't. And I think we're compromising because what happens is when you know your blueprint, you truly understand your blueprint. You stop outsourcing your power and you start leading your life from authentic truth to the life you deserve. So there's my very fast version of 30 years, right? As a child till now, it always has been the same thing of noticing that the external world is not going to fill this if it's out of alignment with who you are.

SPEAKER_00 10:21

You know, you you hit upon two remarkable things. I I was gonna ask you, was there a particular moment that you knew and what you described as an evolution? It became sort of like an awareness about it. And then I was gonna ask you about what happened in your career. That what was that that, you know, Andrew Grove talked about that strategic inflection point where something happens, and you actually describe something happening in your personal life that triggered the change. I I think that that's really remarkable. And drilling down on that for just a bit, but the people that you actually work with, is is that commonly how m what you would see where it's the major change is not something in their public career, but really something personal that hits them that makes that that almost a hundred percent.

SPEAKER_02 11:08

Almost a hundred percent, because what I was sharing with you earlier with those, you know, RBS spots, those blind spots, what happens is is that we avoid them long enough. We get blindsided and like, I don't know why this keeps happening. Like, I've got all the money, I've got the career, I've got I'm so healthy, but I keep having these poor marriages, keep having challenges in my relationships. And I'm like, there's your blind spot, and it keeps blindsiding you, going, I don't know why this happened. I'm like, but this is the third time. Like you don't see the pattern. And so then if we could each understand is something that's deep inside of us that we're avoiding, but it's really a master lesson for me, you know, taking peas and turning it into a business, taking coaching, turning like business really, I grew up in in business with my family. And so that was like, okay, well, that's a no-brainer, but I didn't realize taking care of my health and and being who I was was getting sacrificed. And so I got hit hard with health and marriage as opposed to the success. So I see this a lot where we've we produce what the world tells us is gonna make us peaceful. And it's a pattern, and it'll show up in one of those are the three biggies, right? Like health, wealth, and love. And it's the one you're avoiding that you get blindsided by and going, I can't believe it. And then I get the call. And they're like, and and typically if you look at very high achievers, Don, I've got, you know, I've got jet, I've got the four houses, I've got the money, I've got, I sold my company, I've I've got it all. And I'll ask them to tell me about your relationships. And you can see an immediate lockup, like the energy lockup. And so it really isn't so much that, oh my gosh, can you have or not have love? It's just one of the blind spots that we have to look at and show you that you are more capable than you realize. You're just not aware of it. And if we're not aware of something, it's hard to, it's hard to fix what you can't see.

SPEAKER_00 12:55

Yeah, you hit on something I always tell people, people will be great at one thing, completely horrible at something else. And the trick is, and it's something I I always work on with people, is like how to be good at something else using what you're already great at. Because we're all great at at least one thing. And it doesn't matter what it is, right? Because what what the what the goal is that the thing that you're great at, there are principles involved that allow you to be great. And if you can extract those and apply it to the thing that you're not so great at, you have a better shot. So it's it's great that you you say that. You talked earlier about about burnout, and and I wonder how how is burnout connected to when people feel stuck, or what do people actually misunderstand about that concept where you know they feel stuck?

SPEAKER_02 13:46

Well, because burnout typically applies to doing things that don't align with us, like you were saying, like I'm very good at this one little thing, but our soul, our our energy feel, we came to get better at everything, but we avoid those few things. And so the burnout happens when you're trying to apply uh I I find this a lot in couples in relationships, but it applies to I watch in corporate America and my my executives the same thing. Can you come in and work on our SOPs? Can you come in and work on our strategy? Can you work on our strategy, strategy? And I'm like, okay, no strategy is going to work if you aren't being honest with who you are. So I can apply, so we get masterful a lot of these strategies until they don't work. So they work until they don't. And the burnout happens when we realize we're doing so many things and we're still not full and and alive and we're not living, and we're very masterful at surviving, but we're not living. And it's it's just time for, and so my company, my brand is I deserve it now, right? And I find this fascinating where people are like, well, you know, I have so much. I don't know if I should be, you know, disappointed in not having that. I'm like, we should be able to have it all, but the version of you that is all. I'm a terrible gardener, probably shouldn't have an organic farm. I probably would burn it down, or you wouldn't grow. You know, I want organic food, I'll go get from my friend who is an organic farmer. And so my point is, is we find the version of ourselves that still fills up the lighthouse, but we're we're just without the tools to say, how do I find alignment and and fill in some of these weak spots that I don't think they're weak. I just think we're avoiding them.

SPEAKER_00 15:25

Yeah. You know, the way you describe burnout, the disconnection between who you are, the alignment, and that it reminds me of how I handle procrastination personally. I've created a trigger because I've realized procrastination is you're you're you're basically stalling because it you don't want to do the thing, even if the thing is something good, good for you, or will benefit you, the actual thing is something you just don't want to do. So I created this trigger where if I feel myself procrastinating, I'm like, it's because you don't want to do it. Can you pass it off to somebody else? Or do you really have to just use visualization and just do it? But it it's it's a trigger. If I see myself procrastinating, okay, I'll do it tomorrow. Okay, you know, I'll do it later, Jelani. You don't want to do this thing because that's why you're putting it on.

SPEAKER_02 16:13

Because it's probably harder for you, which is why I teach a lot of people do the hardest thing first. And all this other long, let's call it a very long to-do list, actually falls into place much faster. So do the hard things first because they're typically things you're not as good at. And so it's a kind of an inverted version of your trigger of uh I totally agree with you. It's like I know I don't want to do that. And I I get it, I do the same thing. I avoid it, but I'm like, no, I'm gonna do the hard thing first, then I'll take a break and I'll work on this other long list. And the list, the other long list takes just as less the shorter amount of time than the hard thing I didn't want to do because I was just being resistant to it.

SPEAKER_00 16:53

Yeah, I've really drilled down into myself to figure out what it was. And what I realized is not that it's hard. I have a presupposition it's gonna take a lot of time. Yes. And I'm I always think I do I don't have time. And so I have to remind myself no, no, no, it's not gonna take as long as you think. Just get started. And then when I'm finished, wow, it really didn't take as long as I thought. Exactly. So I have to remind myself, just get into it. It's not gonna take as as as much as you think. Dawn, let's talk about motivation versus awareness. Um, I was reading, I think, in some of the literature that you sent to me, that you say the problem is not effort, it's awareness. What does that mean?

SPEAKER_02 17:31

You kind of already said it, right? Like I'm avoiding it, not just just because it's gonna take time, or it's because we have some like pre-thought of of why something isn't gonna work or why it's gonna take time or why it's gonna be difficult, right? And and so most people, as I said, we don't have a strategy problem. We have a pattern problem. We have an awareness problem, understanding, I should say. Awareness is kind of this new like word out there, like just be aware. And I'm like, okay, I watch a lot of people very aware, and they're still not understanding. And so most people think they have this strategy problem when it's really this understanding of their pattern problem. And so they keep learning more and doing more and pushing more, and nothing really changes because their patterns down below the subconscious are still running the show. And so, what I like to help people understand is once you shift the understanding of your pattern, the strategy actually works. But that resistance, because we have this underlying pattern, and until then, you're just repeating the same results at a higher level. So success doesn't fix your patterns, it exposes them because they get more, they keep coming with you, right? But we keep overriding. Does that make sense?

SPEAKER_00 18:48

It does. It does. What are some of the signs that you recognize in people you coach where you could tell that we're not in control?

SPEAKER_02 18:55

Because high achievers, just call them that, whatever their label is, they repeat patterns because their success has outpaced their programming, and then it appears in those other categories that we were kind of discussing earlier in their life where they aren't in control. And so your brain is wired, like I said, for familiarity, not growth. And so where you and I are good at certain things, like I can just keep growing and growing because I don't have to try. But where I'm not, I'm gonna go to familiar. And so, even though you know better, like I said, your system is going, your nervous system, shall I say, let's use science, is going to choose what feels safe. And and most of that programming, and people don't like to look at this. They're like, I'm not a big fan of like 20 years of therapy. I'm like, you don't need 20 years of therapy. You need clarity now. When you have clarity now, it changes the game. And so when you understand your programming was created in the early years of your life from zero to nine years of age, some say it's seven, you now have this highly capable, successful adult that's being run by outdated nine-year-old nervous system programming and beliefs. And that's why I was saying this is where I always bring in those four B's, right? Your blocks, your baggage, your bruises, and your breakthrough. So they will always tell you where your whole, you're you're stuck, even though all this looks really good. They're always going to show you. And if I ask where they are, I ask people, this is a system I use with my private one-on-one clients, and I have a Soulmasters, like, you know, elite group. And I ask them before each call, these are the three steps I want you to check. Number one, do you understand your BS, your blind spots? But we laugh about it. Okay. Number two, are you standing in your authentic presence? Are you showing up as who you were told to be, or are you showing up as who you know you are? And number three, is it a want or a need? Because if it's a want, you know who you are and you know you want that. As opposed to a need, need is a lack, scarcity mentality. So I need you to be this. I need you to do this for me. I need this team or staff to do a better job, even though is that what you really want? Like, so we're not living off of understanding where we're leaking in our BS, we're standing in authenticity and we're really truthfully stepping into a want reality. I have some male clients who are like, so I'm not supposed to want, you know, two new cars. And I'm like, of course you are. It's in even in your birth chart astrology. We look at it. I'm like, you're an investor. So do you make money on the car? So like, yeah. I'm like, then go buy four more cars. Like for them, it's a part of their soul. So I'm like, do it. Now for me, I could care less about the car, right? Like, as long as it gets me there. So it's a different, like you said, it's different for each person, what matches your soul. But once you see the pattern, and this is such a big deal for me, is you stop managing it and you start changing it. And then you're in charge of how you show up.

unknown 21:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:46

But if you don't ourself understanding instead of that awareness, like if you really understand yourself at those three core points, it's kind of a game changer.

SPEAKER_00 21:54

A lot of talk these days on hustle, side hustles, and all the hustles, the hustle culture. call it. What what are your thoughts on that? The hustle culture versus what you've been talking about, which the underlying theme I think is alignment is what you really been stressing a lot. What are your thoughts about that? The hustle culture versus the alignment and what you're talking about.

SPEAKER_02 22:13

I'm not a fan of it. So hustle culture is part of that burnout culture. Right now, again, I understand that there is a lot of us kind of I should say at my age, right, and in in in our generation, our parents hustled, right? They were, my parents were worker bees and it was all about how much you worked and and how much you put in and and what you put in and I agree with the energies, energy, the direction it's going is a direction you're going to get led. But when it comes to hustle, hustle, hustle, we're doing hustle for strategy and we're not hustling for our soul. When you're in alignment with who you are and you love what you're doing, you're not hustling. You're living it. You're embodying it. You're being who you're supposed to be. When I'm doing what I love doing, when I'm on stage speaking or when I'm teaching groups to wake up and their lives are lit up, I'm not working. I'm not hustling. I maybe have put in like a 20 hour day. I don't feel tired. So this hustle culture of you have to work harder, I don't agree. I think smarter is the way. And I think smarter is when you understand who you are, you stop leaking energy. If that it's a the way I look at it we leak our energy and then we take in everybody's trash and we try to fix their trash as opposed to realizing you're simply a lighthouse and you're here to light up the the path for the boats. You're not here to go out and grab the boat and scream at the boat and come this way. You're just being the embodied example of it.

SPEAKER_00 23:38

Right. Why do you think people confuse productivity with purpose?

SPEAKER_02 23:43

Because that's what we were taught. I mean we were taught that if you're productive now purpose can get a little wonky in my mind because I think purpose has been aligned with career, right? Like what you do. And I don't believe that I believe sometimes your purpose is to truly just be, you know, the example of compassion and maybe you're the CEO, but you're like the most compassionate CEO anyone's ever met. And so it just kind of drips down the pyramid into everybody in your company and they feel it. So your purpose will align a little bit with what you do but your purpose is more so about who you are here to be as opposed to be productive in. Productivity typically comes from what you're good at doing, how you're serving, I should say like how do you want to some people you're your healer or a doctor or whatever the case may be you may be a naturopath. Well that's what you use to serve people. That's productive but that's not your purpose maybe right your purpose might be something else.

SPEAKER_00 24:41

Completely completely you let this drop earlier and I have it in my notes to ask you about it and I want you to talk about the lighthouse mastery like explain it.

SPEAKER_02 24:50

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 24:51

For example I never heard of it before obviously interacting with you so tell me.

SPEAKER_02 24:56

So to be honest with you I kind of just created it to try and do what I had shared earlier which is help you see the unseen, right? These blocks, these stuck points because we are mind, body, soul and the soul is your blueprint right but at the end of the day our mind wants to process things. It needs to visually see something to go, that's real for me. And so I created Lighthouse mastery as a way to see your own patterns very clearly on a piece of paper instead of someone it's kind of why I struggle with therapy. I think it's great in certain scenarios, but talking about things some esoteric out there thought pattern is going to do you no good. You got to see a plan. And so I created Lighthouse mastery like a blueprint or a user's manual for how you operate because anyone who drives a car and all of a sudden the light's going off, what's the first thing we do? I was a brand new I don't know why the lights going off and we go in the glove compartment box and we grab out the user's manual and and and we ask the manual how do I turn this light off and it says push this button and it works and we're good. But we don't use our own user's manual and most people are just guessing. And this is a big deal for me because I don't think we should guess through life. I think you should be very clear and so trying to so most people are trying strategies that work for someone else without understanding themselves. So the framework map is what's happening below your surface of of your of your body and your mind so that you can shift from reacting unconsciously and and create something intentionally. So just imagine that you are a lighthouse right and I use astrology like I said as more of your map less about prediction because I I don't believe in that people ask me all the time tell me about the future Don I'm like your future tomorrow is going to look just like it did in 2025 if you don't know who you are right now. So there's not much I can tell you know like we have to know ourselves. And so when you look at an astrology chart there's 12 slices of pie or room and so if you're a lighthouse and you have 12 rooms in your lighthouse right that's the blueprint of your soul or your user's manual. And so there's no strategy required. And each room in that lighthouse is your self-confidence your money value and worth your communication your home and security your your your romance your health your physical health your business partnerships your marriages your emotions your intimacy sex all those kinds of things our emotional connection our beliefs it's a big deal in that in your lighthouse right like are my beliefs blocking me from growing my career my public standing and my mental health my spiritual my intuition right and so if we laid that down as a blueprint just looking at yourself as a lighthouse and if you're the sun in the center three or four of those rooms you never go in and they're shut and if I show them to you what the lighthouse is telling you are those rooms you're like so if I just open the door and do baby steps one day at a time and turn the lights on and open the windows that's it I'm like that's it. But you don't know which rooms those are you think everything is wrong with you and I I call BS there is nothing wrong with you. You're perfect and beautiful and amazing and and brilliant and you said it perfectly earlier we're all really good at something. Yeah we're all really talented at something and and so that user's manual if you could just see it so I made it so basic that you could be an executive and never want to know about astrology or you could be an astrologer and really want to know because I don't really care. I just want it I've used it as a user's manual to give you a fast version, a fast track to see your your blocks, see your your authentic breakthroughs and how to start choosing what a life that you want speaking of rooms what are some of those invisible rooms we get trapped in you want the biggest ones that a lot of people avoid is the beliefs house the higher learning the higher beliefs like what we were taught as a child we think oh no I don't believe that anymore but they still it's this undercurrent and we don't look at that belief has a lot of impact on our relationships and on our marriages and our business partnerships and we think why do I keep bringing someone these people and this person embezzled from me this person took advantage of me and I'm like because the belief thinks the beliefs we have are an undercurrent we have to step into so that's a big one the belief kind of room the security room is a big deal because we learned that in childhood and so typically where we have what I call the mother wound which would be the moon in your chart right it represents our mother. And that mother wound typically will be it's what I watch where we have a money cap. Because if you think of it this way, your mother was your first form of currency. A current of energy came from her from the food you got the milk you got the attention you got the love you got that was your first bank account of energy. And so that that room is a really big deal when we can go oh she did the best she could with what she had with what she knew and I came here to be bigger than that. And once you know that then you're okay with it. But if you don't know it, you think something's wrong with you. And I just don't think anything's wrong with people. I don't see life like that.

SPEAKER_00 29:55

Okay. What does it mean to activate the CEO of the soul?

SPEAKER_02 29:59

So if you could understand that your soul is aware of all your gifts, you know, becoming the CEO is about leading your life from the inside out instead of reacting to everything outside of you. Andor soul, you can call it your spirit you can call it your soul you can call it your blueprint whatever it is has that blueprint of saying this is you living at your highest, most powerful self. Now I use CEO like lightly because you're becoming the chief energy officer of your life. And if you're not in charge of that energy and you're not truly understanding of your energy pattern many people most people are just managing their lives and and they're managing expectations or managing responsibilities or managing perceptions and approval ratings and how many likes they got on a social media right they're managing it but they're not actually leading from their authentic internal soul. And so leadership starts from your internal operating system, your patterns, your beliefs, your emotional responses to life. And so if you're really understanding of that, when you shift from that external validation which I'm sure you see this a lot, that's how most people live and you move to the internal authority you're a lighthouse that never moves. No matter what storm, no matter what boat is lost, you don't get upset, you believe in them, they'll make it to shore you'll find common ground you stop asking what I should do and you start asking what's actually true for me.

SPEAKER_00 31:23

That's when you're living from the CEO of your soul what should someone be paying attention to when they feel themselves emotionally activated or stimulated.

SPEAKER_02 31:33

You ready? Ready for this? I'm gonna give you a one-liner stop trying to fix yourself. This is such a big deal because we think something's wrong and I think that's where people go wrong. And we're always trying to fix ourselves so you're always going to be in a state of lack and need. And when I try to explain to people there is nothing wrong with you. And I'm sure you've seen this we're in this information tsunami of everything that's wrong with us. I mean you can't get on social media or online or have a discussion about what's right. And honestly this is where I was saying I call BS on this because if we keep trying to fix ourselves instead of understanding ourselves you don't need more healing you need more self-understanding. And because most people don't actually know themselves that's why self-mastery is really those three steps I gave you. If you want a healthy relationship with your health your wealth and your love if you really knew who you were that's it. But people skip this biggest piece of who am I really? And I ask all my clients this I'm like who are you without your title, without your label, without your money, without your house like who are you? And I'm sure you know the answer. I don't know. And that breaks my heart. It truly I mean this is it truly breaks my heart because we're living in this robotic unconscious patterns and not in that soul's authentic blueprint. So when people get triggered I try to explain to them you don't have a communication or a strategy problem. You have an honesty problem and you're not living authentically from your honest self. You're struggling with the external telling you what to do and then you're it's not working. So when you get triggered people typically I have a a course and a product I teach it's called your relationships your reality is a reflection of your relationships. And so when someone triggers me I'm like great that's something I got to work on. I want to feel this I don't have to like it but it's definitely something I'm grateful that I saw. My husband does it all to me all the time and he's like you know I'm sorry and I'm like no no this is wonderful. I'm sorry you know we really have a great understanding of who we are but we take everything so personal external instead of realizing okay that's one of my little weak spots and I'm gonna do I'm gonna work on this better and I'm not gonna take this storm personal.

SPEAKER_00 33:42

Right. In your experience what have you seen how the subconscious affects our ability to achieve the self-mastery that you're you're talking about.

SPEAKER_02 33:51

It's more comfortable to stay in call it blinded by it or ignoring it or avoidance. I mean avoidance is just much more comfortable you know it's almost like some days I I even myself you know like some days I'm like maybe I just know too much and like naivety is probably a blessing you know like what you you don't know is it hurting you and so I think we avoid all this because it's uncomfortable. And you have to have a big fat dose of courage to say I'm gonna go do things that are uncomfortable because I know they're gonna make me bigger and br they're gonna help me grow.

unknown 34:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:25

You you mentioned therapy and clarity earlier. Why do why do you think people need clarity and not therapy because we're talking about problems.

SPEAKER_02 34:34

We're not talking about solutions. We're sitting in therapy talking about you know couple's therapy and they got a middleman and trying to prove who was right and who did what and whose you know infraction was the worst re it's their fault that I'm not okay. And so we're talking about the problem we're not talking about the fire. We're talking about the smoke. Right? We're talking about the smoke going up and I'm like you're not talking about the authenticity of each of you just being honest with truth and we look at different things in life and we're like okay I have no problem with some people who have had some serious traumas. I mean this is they haven't had great experiences in life. So to process it is great but to continually process it as it's a label or something's wrong with me, this is where I draw the line. I think it keeps us small. And this is a syndrome we've gotten into where we've got to do the work. We've got to do the therapy and I'm like yes do the work I'm gonna show you the work very fast in your chart on paper but once you see it we're done let's now grow. But we get stuck in that cycle of wanting to continually talk about what happened and why it's affecting you. And then we start creating health problems from it, right? And that energetic depression and sadness and and and and trauma it has to go somewhere so it embeds in the physical cellular system and then the body's the body will say no for us right. And so then when the health goes wrong we're like see now look at me and I'm like the body's trying to get you an alarm system. It's telling you come here don't go out there anymore. But we don't listen to that that body telling us how to change. So I don't not believe in it. I just think it it has gotten excessive to the point where we're constantly focused on what's wrong instead of what's right.

SPEAKER_00 36:11

Yeah I I I agree especially as men the current culture is you know men seeking therapy and mental help and I I think it's a positive thing but I agree with what you're saying we're we're focusing on what's wrong and you will get what you focus on. Right. That's one of the big things that people do not realize you get what you focus on.

SPEAKER_02 36:30

If I'm trying to decode my own patterns what are some of the things I can recognize in in the blueprint behind like my reactions is there anything that I should pay attention to as I'm trying to you know decode and my cipher my personal cipher so you know I again if if we're using my tool right like I would suggest like look there's a free astrology birth chart. You don't even have to read it you don't have to know what it is but it will give you truly the day you were born the time you were born this is what the universe looked like right you got this energy tattooed on your soul. And then I tell people if you're going through some of my courses mini courses right they're very short and easy go through my reality check reset and it's going to ask you to put that chart into AI and it's going to run your code and it's gonna say Jelani here's where you're blocked it's in this it's in your money category and it's in your value and worth and so really you don't have a problem making money you actually have a block here about what you're worth. So it starts you there and going okay cool I can just focus and then it gives you the second piece which is your baggage your emotional baggage well where do I look for this decode? Okay, it's gonna go pull up your moon where your mother energy is and saying hey this is actually in your health house. So every time you get emotional it causes you to get sick and then you're like see instead of going no no no no no we have control is so it helps you pull into less to worry about and focusing on how can I upgrade just two things, four things. So decoding shouldn't be that hard it should just pinpoint where to look instead of looking through all of you and like something's wrong. So this is kind of the direction I take people is like you don't even have to know it. Just decode it put it in and then ask where do I start and starting points as you and I just said now I know where to go as opposed to what happened back there, which is doing me no good. At least it did me no good.

SPEAKER_00 38:20

Yeah. Based on your tools what would you say to somebody who looks successful but they feel lost they're not lost.

SPEAKER_02 38:27

They just forgot who they were we've we have like this weird amnesia when we come in and we again we're we're we pick our parents pick our mom and dad as a soul we know who we are we know the lessons we're gonna learn something from them we come to upgrade and we do very well in mastering delivering our strategy and our our gifts to the world but when you're low and you're stuck it's typically just saying look I need to look under the hood and find out which alarms are going off and I need to open the user's manual and find them and realize that there's not a lot wrong with me. I just have been avoiding a couple spots and if we can look I there's some men's groups that I I work with and I send like you said it's they get a little lost and I realize they're all getting lost and they're very hyper successful men. And now they're all lost in strategy Jelani and I was like what you just said earlier we're getting lost in the strategy and I had to explain to them you don't have a communication you don't have a strategy problem you have an honesty problem because you're not looking under the hood and I gave you the answers on paper and you still avoiding it. So the the true courage comes from looking.

SPEAKER_00 39:32

Okay. Um we're almost out of time Dawn but I want to ask you one more question before I let you go. Based on your tools and everything you teach and what you offer what's one question that somebody should ask themselves tonight for example does my reality reflect my like what relationships are in my life and do they reflect the reality I want?

SPEAKER_02 39:54

Like is the reality who I want that I want to live in whatever it is that we're dreams we're wishing for do these relationships reflect that reality and they'll show you because you're like well I'm never going to get that reality with this relationship which means it's a you change right it's not a them change. And so it's a very simple way to look at our lives that our reality is a reflection of our relationships. And I have a free quiz on my website you can just go take it free reality check quiz and you can go, okay, I gotta go check and see oh my gosh these relationships are really reflecting back to me who I've allowed myself to be and the reality we want is very easy to achieve but we gotta look. So that's always the tip I tell people is just sit back and close your eyes and look at the reality you are in. Is it the one you want? Is it the one you deserve? And if it's not just start understanding is where is it that you're attracting these relationships out of the wrong frequency and the wrong energy and could you upgrade that relationship environment situations and or yourself and the relationships will edit, adapt grow with you or not according to the reality that you're shifting into.

SPEAKER_00 41:04

And one last thing before I let you go what's the website where they can take that free quiz you mentioned it's I deserve it now.

SPEAKER_02 41:11

I deserve it now dot com or my name donthompson.com but I deserve it now as easy. Not not yesterday not tomorrow but right now ideserve it now dot com.

SPEAKER_00 41:19

Perfect I deserve it now dot com and Dawn Thompson dot com.

SPEAKER_02 41:23

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 41:23

We'll leave it there. Dawn thank you so much for coming on behind the story.

SPEAKER_01 41:26

Thank you it was a pleasure to be here I enjoyed it behind the story behind the storm