Men Don't Heal, They Distract Themselves

On this episode of Cutt Straight 2 It 💈, the fellas get real about the emotional weight men carry in silence. Instead of healing, a lot of men stay busy — working, partying, chasing women, scrolling, drinking, smoking, joking, or shutting down completely just to avoid facing what’s really hurting them.

The conversation dives into trauma, pride, depression, heartbreak, anger, fatherhood, relationships, and the pressure society puts on men to “man up” instead of speaking up. Marty, Hak, and ReL unpack personal experiences, uncomfortable truths, and the distractions men use to cope when healing feels unfamiliar.

This episode is raw, honest, relatable, and necessary for anybody trying to understand the emotional side of men beyond the tough exterior.

Cutt Straight 2 It 💈 — Where we don’t sugarcoat it… we speak on it.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:12

I I'm I'm cool with being there for people, but stuff like that. Um I don't know. Like my power. I mean much. That's my problem.

SPEAKER_03 0:24

You know what though when we let pain sit too long? It's just starting to stuff, it's starting to turn in the anger, depression, coldness, emotional detachment. Like, you know what I mean? If we don't deal with it, we don't learn how to deal with stuff, then it started to swallow you up. Like it went through that love. Like, you know what I mean? I had got so far out of my person that I couldn't remember who I was. Damn. Men be carrying pain, we never speak on. Smiling in public, breaking down in private. We taught to stay strong. We taught not to cry. We taught the man up. So instead of healing, most men distract themselves with money, women, work, drugs, liquor, social media, the streets, anything to avoid. Sitting alone with their thoughts. Welcome back to Cut Straight to It, where we're on Sugarcoat It, we speak on it. And today's episode is Men Don't Heal, They Distract Themselves.

SPEAKER_01 1:51

I agree.

SPEAKER_04 1:54

So I'll how was your week, man? Uh great. I I don't know. I usually don't have bad weeks. Just be life. Like basically what you said. Just keep pushing. Yeah, you gotta keep pushing. I've been distracting myself working. Yeah. Mother's Day. Yeah. That shit was hard.

SPEAKER_03 2:15

That was a lot of problems. Yeah. That's crazy you said that. Yeah. And you know what's it's even crazier, like, cause we not taught to show, show our pain. We taught, we taught to suppress it. Like, and sometimes it like not getting it out is the worst thing in the world. Like as little boys, we hear, like, stop, stop crying. Tough enough, nigga. You gotta be tough. Don't be soft. And as men, I think we we we we raise a lot of our kids to be uh the predator and not the prey. Like, you know what I mean? Because you don't want your kid to be soft. Like, you know, you I I think it's just a masculine thing. Yeah. Like, you know what I mean? And that's not always a good thing, you don't think. Nah, because eventually then you start exp you stop expressing emotions altogether. And a lot of men don't even know how to communicate pain. Yeah, I don't.

SPEAKER_04 3:18

I don't I suppressed it so much that I don't even have that emotion no more. I think that stopped probably like 10. That's like that's burning it. Yeah. I don't I don't even let it enter my mind. Pain. Pain. Like, if you act even with death, I'm talking about me so much, bro. It don't affect me at all. I don't know if it's a good or bad thing. I just think about it too much. Nah, right.

SPEAKER_03 3:53

Worry about it. For me, I don't know what to happen. From on the outside looking in, you just a genuine person, like you care. Like it's hard for you to see the bad in a person. Like, you know what I mean? And you you willing to give a person the benefit of the doubt. And that's a great quality, but sometimes that quality could be self-sabotage. Self-destructive. Like, because you'll give a person your all, and they be like parasites, man. Yeah. They'll leech on you, and they'll just keep they blood suckers, like they keep sucking and keep, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 4:30

Pause, but my man always calls them bottom feeders. Yeah. Yeah. Like I was able to tolerate it when I was younger, but now that I'm getting older, my patience getting a little lower. I'm starting to get burnt out.

SPEAKER_03 4:45

And it's it's you can see it. Like, you know what I mean? A person never show up for you, but always want you to show up for them. Like, you know what I mean? I think real friendship is calling a person and be like, yo, you good?

SPEAKER_04 5:01

That'd be your fault sometime though, because like I I do it a lot too, but we'll take a person like Rail, you make yourself accessible, right? And people so used to that that they make it like the time they don't have access to you, you wrong. Right. You ain't shit. Oh, he fake him my real friend. Like, bro.

SPEAKER_03 5:24

They just so used to you saying it or being there. Yeah. And like, you know what I mean? Noah's a complete sentence. No, yeah, no, period. Noah's a complete sentence. Nah, it is though. Yeah, like, you know what I mean? Sometimes you just gotta make sure you okay. Like, you know what I mean? Because everybody ain't gonna make sure you okay. Right.

SPEAKER_04 5:51

So and I haven't been. And um people might not even notice, but I haven't been.

SPEAKER_03 5:56

That's that's that's that's what we talking about right now. I'm gonna give you the, you know what I mean, the floor, you know what I mean. Tell us what's some of the things you've been going through. Just the death of my mom. Yeah, I know that. Like, you know, and I can't say that I I I I can't I don't understand what you're going through. Right. Because I've never been through that. But my heart does go out to you. And knowing you and knowing your mom, I know she's proud of you. Like, for real. Like, you know what I mean? And because I talked to Chip. You know what I mean? Me and Chip was cool, so I know she's proud of you. Like to see the man that you became, bro, is I'm proud of you. Like, you know what I mean? Yeah, I'm proud of you. And keep pushing, and we here. Like, you know what I mean? We we all here.

SPEAKER_04 6:51

Uh like I don't I I could I'm just I'm cool with being there for people, but with stuff like that, I don't have no emotion. Like my pop, it ain't even been eight months since my pop died. My cousins and them, they be asking me, yo, you cool? They be looking, I don't have no emotion.

SPEAKER_03 7:12

You know what though, when we let pain sit too long without healing, it started to turn into stuff. It's turned it it turned into anger, depression, coldness, emotional detachment. Like, you know what I mean? If we don't deal, if we don't learn how to deal with stuff, then it it it it starts to swallow you up. Like I went through that, bro. Like, you know what I mean? I had got so far out of my person that I couldn't remember who I was. Damn. Like, you know what I mean? Like, and damn. That's why I know like when people going through stuff, like you you gotta have an outlet. Like somebody to talk to, like, because people always look at us and be like, oh, you cool.

SPEAKER_04 8:11

Can I ask you a question though?

SPEAKER_03 8:13

Go ahead.

SPEAKER_04 8:14

Do you think because you know everything got reason? Do you think the reason why you got so far that you couldn't remember who you was because you wasn't supposed to remember that person? Could you change you you know how you mature and turn into a better you get what I'm saying? I know what you're saying.

SPEAKER_03 8:34

All right, so let me clear it up. Like, I mean, I couldn't remember the good in myself. Oh, oh shit. Like, you know what I mean? I I felt like I wasn't I was doing more harm to my family than helping help. Damn. And bro, when you get there, oh my goodness, that joint real. Like that's that's that's a real thing. So you just on autopilot, basically, when you was on here? Yeah, basically. And then be having to deal with your world outside of that. Like you your fuse become short as a mug. Like it's hard to to to want to do anything, to want to pour into anything. You basically trying to get when you wake up in the morning, you you want the day to be over. Like you just you just here existing. That's that's a painful thing, man. And then you don't know how you're gonna get out of it. You don't know how you're gonna get out of it. You just you just keep pushing yourself, pushing yourself, pushing yourself, and then you know what I mean, you be like, I've been doing and taking care of people all my life. Like this should be a no-brainer. But sometimes like for me, I had lost my ability to hustle. Like changed. Because you still the same you. Nah. See, you know what I mean? This like people don't understand. Money is a drug too. For sure. Like, money is a drug.

SPEAKER_04 10:23

I think that shit worse than the the drugs that you take.

SPEAKER_03 10:26

Yeah, and when you when you when you live in your life and you ain't gotta worry about nothing. Like, you know what I mean? You just got it. And then when it's gone, bro. Mm-hmm. It's a readjustment to where you you gotta be like, now I gotta make sure I gotta go back into grind mode. And we adults, now your grind mode is something is totally different. Totally different. Like, you know what I mean? I I cruise on autopilot now. Like, you know what I mean? I got my whip, I do a little lift in the morning, I'm a buck fifty, two hundred a day with that, coming in the shop, I make a band or two. I'm cool with that. Like, you know what I mean? But that's now. Yeah. Then chasing that, trying to chase what I had kept pushing me further and further down. Like, you know what I mean? I did that for years. Like, you you you got bills, they thousands upon thousands of dollars. And people can only see, like, oh, you got money.

SPEAKER_04 11:36

Bro, you don't know what you don't know what I'm going through. You gotta alter your whole mind. Because in a certain lifestyle, it ain't no care in the world. You know you got it. That shit slow down. The the addiction be just like when you go through withdrawal with say with pills, you know, the the withdrawal with money be you gotta alter your mind because you used to just doing what you want. And you you not getting the same, but you getting some so soon as you get the money, your mind just goes back to that mindset. You start buying that's the same thing, as yeah, like the pit is is really an addiction. That's why, like, so that's why um like those stockbrokers or something, like if the market crashed, they commit suicide. Yeah, yeah, it's that devastating.

SPEAKER_03 12:24

Listen, money is a drug. I'm telling you. For sure. When you have it, you riding on top of the world, and when it leaves you, nigga, you hit bottom.

SPEAKER_04 12:38

See, I never had it to that to that effect, like that much money. Yeah, just to where if it leaves me. Then you don't never think it's gonna stop. That's the thing. Like, especially when it goes a certain amount of time, you never think it's it's gonna stop. And then one day stuff changed. Yeah, yeah, you've been living this way for 10 years. You think you can alter your mind in a week to stop being like that? That shit hard.

SPEAKER_03 13:07

And it ain't even stop being like that. It's like now you gotta now it it takes you reevaluating yourself and realizing the man you really are. So now you gotta pivot and readjust because you cool. Like, you know what I mean? You riding a wave, baby. Yeah, like you know what I mean. You like, oh yeah, life is beautiful. Like, you know what I mean? What's up? We out, yeah. We out. Where we going at? We we here, we there. Like nothing matters. Like, you know what I mean? How much is it? You ain't even asking.

SPEAKER_01 13:37

Right.

SPEAKER_03 13:38

Like, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 13:39

You just just I'm gonna tell everybody who living that life, whenever you got some spare time, I don't care how much money you getting in the streets, tap into your gift that God gave you. Because when the street shit stops, the money stops, you gonna have to use whatever you, whether it's drawing, rapping, fixing houses, you're gonna have to tap into your gift that God. So when you got some spare time when you're getting all that money, try elevate your gift that you naturally got. Cause you're gonna need it at some point in life. I promise you. Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03 14:16

And see, right now, I tell I tell that's what I tell my sons. Like, I got one son that he be like, uh, dad, I got my credit up. I'm like seven something right now. You're like, I'm about to get this money. I'm like, Yeah, but what you gonna do with it?

SPEAKER_01 14:28

Yeah, that's the more important part.

SPEAKER_03 14:30

He like when I get it, I'm gonna I'm gonna figure out what to do with it. I said, Listen to me. I said, if there's one thing that your father can tell you, son, is gonna get it and burn that shit. Once you get that shit, if you don't have a plan, you're gonna torch through that shit. Yeah, don't just let it sit. It ain't gonna sit because first you're gonna handle the things that you're supposed to, like, you know, I mean, you might be in a hole a little bit, you're gonna be like, Oh yeah, I'm gonna pay that off. But after you pay that off, now it's uh ball a little bit. Right.

SPEAKER_04 14:58

My girl used to always say, like, with that shit, the old folk man, that money burning a hole in your pocket. You can't have money and just you're a good, I know some people, but it's is an addiction. Stuff going when you got money, stuff be calling you.

SPEAKER_03 15:14

Listen, buy me. Because you know you got it. Buy me. Listen, you get a you get you you come up a little bit to where you up. And bro, nothing means I've I've sat down with friends, man, and we sat at the table, and you'll throw your card on the table, boom. Oh, like out of dinner or something. Yeah, my brother get me with that stuff all the time. Uh-huh. There's no being dig around him, man. He he he that joker got platinum for days. He'd be like, Ding.

SPEAKER_04 15:49

That's how my brother is. Once I realize he, I'm with him. I'm like, yo, every time we at the bar, this nigga just keep giving him his car. I finally asked, I said, bro, what the fuck is that? Mind you is metal. The shit don't got no limit. Nigga could buy a house on the car. Yeah, yeah. What is like a platinum black? Oh, yeah, it's black, but it's like steel, like metal.

SPEAKER_03 16:12

They platinum American Expresses. Okay. And listen, one time we up, we up, my brother, we like to go up to the uh city winery of Philly, right? So my wife, my brother always trying to, he paid for everything. So we like, all right. I tell a waitress, my wife, like, yeah, tell the waitress, bring me the check. Yeah, I bring me, she brings me the check, I pay that joint, you know what I mean? Because they bought the tickets and everything. Dog. I look at my phone, he done cashed that me, the money.

SPEAKER_04 16:43

He on his shit though.

SPEAKER_03 16:44

That's yeah.

SPEAKER_04 16:45

That's that's who you that's like somebody like that. That's who you need to spend your idle time with. Yeah, yeah, that's we be wasting our time spending our idle time with.

SPEAKER_03 16:56

You don't have to worry about whether they're around you for uh for money or a certain reason. And they could teach you something because they can't really. Listen, for me, I watched him. He's younger than me, but I watched him from a kid, man. I watched the man he became. Like, you know what I mean? He was more like, hey, like all paid in full. Yeah, I was Mitch. How much younger is Rail to you? Raleigh is 50, 50, 50 now, I think he is. Oh, like four, three, four years.

SPEAKER_04 17:33

Four years.

SPEAKER_03 17:35

And that's not my that's that's my brother. Like, that's like if we had the same mama, but that's my brother. Like, that's my bro. And that's crazy. Like, you know what I mean. And to have people like that around you in your circle that that's that's there, that's genuine. Like, you know what I mean. You we ain't I ain't around you. You ain't around you for what you can get. Is I call my bro sometimes just to be like, yo, I love you, nigga. Yeah, like you good, like you're taking some time for you. You need me to do something, right?

SPEAKER_04 18:09

They be needing it the most. That more money, more problems, and all that. It they need it the most. Nobody cares when you got when you seem like you the person who got stuff, people feel like they don't, they you obsolete with them questions. They don't gotta ask you how your day going because they feel like money solves all problems and it don't. It don't it soothe money can soothe. Yeah, but once you get everything that you felt like was your dreams, then what you gonna do?

SPEAKER_01 18:37

Then what, right?

SPEAKER_04 18:38

Yeah, what you gonna do now? You you got the car all the shit you thought that you wanted, you got it. Now, what you gonna do when you alone?

SPEAKER_03 18:45

That's because you know what I mean? People think this when you when you living like that, it's it's distraction and they just oh they strong because they got money. Bro, you ain't worrying about what that bull is going through mentally or what a person is going through mentally, like you know what I mean. We go through, yeah, like you know what I mean. I t I tell my wife when I come in the crib, like, at least give me an hour to decompress from the world before you talk to me because I might not give you the response that you want. And I don't want to be rude to you because I love you, yeah. Like, but if you give me that hour, then I can accept what it is that you want to tell me. I I didn't even know you was going through that, Mary. I know, like you know what I mean, and you ain't show it or nothing. You you you try your best to hide it and be like your regular self, but inside, dog, you fighting just to get through days. Damn, you really gotta be able to have people that you can genuinely trust. And once you own your truth, though, you come out of it. And make it easier. Yup. I'm telling you, listen, I posted one day, man, on social media. I was like, I'm screaming, but nobody hears me. And somebody seen it and called somebody else. When they heard it, they immediately called me. And we just had a good long conversation. And through the conversation, man, he said one word, and that word stuck with me. It was like consistency. It was just the word, you sometimes it's it's it's somebody could say what you need to hear at that moment, and that shit just resonates with you so much that it put you back where you needed to be. Like, you know what I mean? And consistency for me was I know that. Yeah, I know how to be consistent at something. And I know that consistency went. Like, so I just started being consistent with everything. Yeah. That's when you see me come back in here and get on my job. Right. Like, you know what I mean? So I think, I think, I thank the creator for people like that. I think God that you you you can have friends that you don't have to be fake with. Like, you know what I mean? Because we always trying to put up this image of who we are instead of being who we are. Instead of just being it. Yeah, like you know what I mean. And that shit sometimes is hard. Like, you know what I mean? Just the oh, I gotta be strong for you. I gotta, you know what I mean? I got a son that called me and be like, Dad, you good? And I'll be like, Yeah, I'm good. He talking about, nah, you good. I'm talking about mentally, and I'm like, Yeah, I'm good. Yeah. But that right there keeps me good. To know that, you know what I mean, to to see what I would have lost out on if I would have took, if I'd have, I'd have been selfish and ended my life.

SPEAKER_04 21:54

Right.

SPEAKER_03 21:55

Like I wouldn't see this right now. I wouldn't have knew that there. Was a uh a light at the end of my tunnel. So I started to make I knew that my decisions put me in that place, so I started to make different different decisions. And it pulled me out of that place. So now I'm happy. Yeah. You ever felt like that, Hawk? No.

SPEAKER_04 22:21

No. I've been through the worst shit, but I I suppressed pain. I don't have that emotion. Like, it ain't no disrespect. I don't have that emotion.

SPEAKER_03 22:34

He turned that joint off.

SPEAKER_04 22:36

Yeah, and like I don't like I don't even people I can't even stay mad longer than 30 seconds. Like once I voice what's on my mind, I don't care about that shit. How you do that? God, that's just you always been like that. I've always been like that. Wow. Yeah, one time my mom used to always say, uh, like, she'd be like, sometime, it's cool to cry sometime, you know what I'm saying? She like, if you gotta lock yourself in a room and cry, cry. She like, I do it sometimes. One time I I guess I tried it. I went in the room, locked myself in the room, I started laughing, got up and walked out. But once you know your purpose, I feel like life is easier. My purpose is to be the strength of people. I always just been the strength of people. That's my purpose. But you not having that, you feel like you ever was missing something? Or just forever or two. I don't want to miss pain. I'm kind of glad. I like my younger years, I had pain, but once, like, I suppressed it, like I never really had pain. Like, it ain't funny or nothing, but do you have you met a lot of people that's like that too? Nobody. That's why, like, I was wondering if it was like a Sagittarius thing, or I don't even think nobody understands it.

SPEAKER_03 24:01

Yeah, see, and the damage of unhealed men, unhealed men hurt people. Not always physically, but emotionally. You'll push away a relationship easily. You struggle to trust people.

SPEAKER_04 24:21

Yeah, I don't trust nobody.

SPEAKER_03 24:22

Yeah, you struggle to communicate with people. It's hard to get out how you feel. You struggle to love properly. Like it's then because you can't pour peace into somebody, you can't pour peace into somebody else when you living in chaos. And a lot of times people can't see that that that war you're going through, but you assume that they know that you're going through a war. Like, you know what I mean? Like you just said. Like, you know what I mean? You said it's been hard on me with my mom. I'd have never known that if you wouldn't have said it. Because you're going through a war inside your mind, but your outer is I'm calm. Cool. Yeah. That's but when people love you and stuff like that, and they see people taking advantage of you, we get upset. Like I told you, I said, yo, I don't understand how a dude could do that. Like, you know what I mean? When you wasn't, bro, that don't make sense to me. That really doesn't, and it it kind of ticked me off. Like, you know what I mean? It don't make sense to me.

SPEAKER_01 25:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 25:34

Like, you know what I mean? Damn, when do you give? You only want people to give you.

SPEAKER_04 25:40

That's what that movie. You don't remember that movie with T H and them? They made that movie for a reason. Takers. Oh. So some people just takers, man.

SPEAKER_03 25:51

Natural born takers.

SPEAKER_04 25:52

Some people just takers. A lot of people don't understand. But I get to hear it and all that. Sometimes though, maybe once or twice in my life, like I would see somebody going through something, and I'm I'm an empathetic person. Like I could feel that's the only problem I have. I try not to even get too connected to people problem because I'd be too wrapped up in that shit. Yeah, I'm saying I get too, and then it bothered me because some people would be like, you will never understand. Because don't tell me I don't understand.

SPEAKER_03 26:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 26:31

Cause you won't know. Like, I'm I'm feeling the emotion like it didn't happen. So that that be my big problem, like the empathy. Like, I'm too connected to that shit, especially if I'm like that with strangers. But if it's a love for you, yeah, it'd be even though I could hide that your pain be my pain, that shit be on my mind. That's that's that's how I'll be with him. No, that's how I'll be with him.

SPEAKER_03 26:58

I'll be actually mad. Like, and he be cool.

SPEAKER_04 27:01

I'll be like his temperament different. How you be saying like about me? Yeah, sometimes I wish I could have that. Your temperament be like sometimes like I'm gonna get shit out of him.

SPEAKER_03 27:20

Both of y'all are polar opposites. For real? Yeah, yeah. Hawk is is no feeling. You all feeling. I got some feeling, some fuck it. Like, you know what I mean? It's a good balance.

SPEAKER_04 27:31

It be balanced though, yeah. It's a good balance.

SPEAKER_03 27:34

Like, you know what I mean? And that's why I said like to sit down and have conversations with y'all. I look forward to him. Like, you know what I mean? I know that we be we taping the podcast and people get to hear what's going on, but these be our conversations for real.

SPEAKER_04 27:48

Oh, yeah. Without that's that's what made this even happen. It's be our conversation without a mic or a camera. Yep. Just talking. Uh-huh. It just turned into this. Nobody, nobody wouldn't really understand it.

SPEAKER_03 28:00

I'm learning how to be on my own time. Like, you know what I mean? People see things and want people to move on their time schedule. I'm on my own.

unknown 28:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 28:12

And I'm okay with that. Like, you know what I mean? What's for me is gonna be for me. And the creator already told me what I'm privy to, what I'm gonna have. So I'm patient, bro.

SPEAKER_04 28:22

Right.

SPEAKER_03 28:23

It took a long time for me to learn patience. I'm patient, man.

SPEAKER_04 28:27

That was the hardest thing in life for me. Yeah. Patience. The hardest thing in life. That's all I heard my whole life. That was the hardest thing for me is patience. My patience was in the negatives. Some people say they should be at zero. My shit was negative. I ain't have no patience. Like that shit was just you mean with people or everything. Yeah, everything. Like I would have younger me, it would have bothered me so much. We dropped this first joint and somebody ain't called and offered a deal, and we had a hundred thousand views that night. I got you. I just didn't understand the concept of it was my mind, and I was making a lot of stuff happen, but that shit was not good at the end of the day. All it did was build up like a tolerance for something that I had no control over. With the music, that's why you is that why you start it just wasn't happening fast enough. Yep. Yeah, and then I probably could have just kept because people it takes time. Yeah, but I just I and like a Sagittarius, they be on to the next shit so fast.

SPEAKER_03 29:44

Yo, I be on to the next it's not because it didn't happen for me. It's just I'm a Leo. Once you conquer something, you be like, Oh yeah, y'all like the same. Like, you know, you smack that shit, boom. People be like, yo, but you can do this, you can do that. And I'll be like, man, yeah, I'm on to this. Right. I'd be like, you can do that.

SPEAKER_04 30:04

Go ahead. That's how I'll be, but you know, they say Leos and says like the cousins. Yeah, like I can see that. Yeah, so like when people say that, like I'm the same way, like, all right, you could do it. Like you, and it's hard to excite me. Like, I don't get excited over nothing, but I'll give you like yeah the benefit of the doubt, like, yeah, but like even with we go so far as motherfucker, such and such coming, Jay-Z coming in, he won't should be hyped to see me. I don't give a fuck about that nigga.

SPEAKER_03 30:39

Yo, I remember one time me and my man listen, me and my man up South Street, dog. We at Ishka Bibbles, beans up that jump. He like, bro, they go beans. I'm like, man, fuck beans, nigga.

SPEAKER_04 30:52

And it ain't even like fuck beans, like fucking my man, but I ain't nowhere in the world.

SPEAKER_03 30:59

I'm sitting up here munching on this job. Pause.

SPEAKER_04 31:03

Like me, I listen, I listen to that nigga all the time, but I just look at it like that's one of my favorite. Yeah, we all humans. Like, if I'm checking for him, nigga, check for me. Yeah, right. Yeah, what and people only doing that because of stardom, but what what what make you a star? Because you seem more than me.

SPEAKER_03 31:24

Star where I'm at. Yeah, basically, more people know you like it's your exposure to people. Right. So if you got exposure to more people than I do, then you're a star. They ain't a stardom, man. That'll make you a star.

SPEAKER_04 31:40

So I don't I don't just that's why I really just stay in my own lane. I don't I don't like say too much because I don't be worried about that.

SPEAKER_03 31:50

That right there is priceless. Stay in your own lane. I just stay in my life. I've learned over time to do that. Like stay in your own lane, bro. Right. What's for you is for you. What's for somebody else is for somebody else. You can't worry about what the next man got, what the next man getting. None of that. Like, you know what I mean? That's not yours. That's not for you. All you gotta do is find your purpose and pour into your purpose and become who you're gonna be. Live your truth. For sure. That's what I got.

SPEAKER_04 32:28

Your truth might not be the drive of Bentley and have a million eyes.

SPEAKER_03 32:32

It can be if that's what you want.

SPEAKER_04 32:34

It can be because, like, we the only life form that's not creatures that have it. We could change our lifestyle. You can manifest anything in it.

SPEAKER_03 32:43

You can manifest anything in your life.

SPEAKER_04 32:44

But a lot of people get caught up in that. Like, they'll see somebody like with a certain you maybe you're not supposed to be a rapper, but you can make a million dollars because you might know how to dance or something, or dress people, or but people be so caught up on my man, he he did it. You know you can't fucking rap.

SPEAKER_03 33:03

That's just because it's just because people are not uh how you say that honest with themselves. No, I'm not I ain't gonna say honest with yourself, but they ain't everybody not creative. Yeah, yeah, that's true. You know what I mean? Some people just that's true, they they okay with morphing into other people. That's crazy. If they see something that's working for somebody else, they they okay with well, I'm gonna do it the way they did it. And for me, I used to have a problem with that bad. Like, I'd be like, yo, what the fuck, man? Like, be you. But now I'd be like, my brother used to tell me, man, that's a form of compliment. I'd be like, man, fuck that. Excuse me. I'll be like, man. You mean people copying what you do? Yes. Yeah. Like, you know what I mean? Why you can't be original. They just not creative. It's not creative, but you know what I mean, or just patterning themselves after what they do, but it's a form of flattery. Like, but you can't, it it's it's hard to accept it.

SPEAKER_01 34:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 34:02

Because we we we we always clash. Yeah, you're really influencing them though. Right. That's why they're doing it. So, you know what I mean? You you gotta be okay with with leading. That's what I said. Like, you know, through my readings and stuff like that, I've learned that nobody really believes what you say. No. But they're they're they'll take a different interest in what they see.

SPEAKER_04 34:25

Because you believe what you see.

SPEAKER_03 34:26

You believe what you some of what you see.

SPEAKER_04 34:28

What with your ears here really can deceive you.

SPEAKER_03 34:32

Yeah, but what you see with your eyes, that could trick you, but you still believe more what you see. You get more deep. I said now for me is okay, if I know that I could be influential by movement, by motive by motion, then let me have some ocean. Let me move. So if you want to follow me, follow me. And I'm gonna lead you where we all should be. Right. Like, you know what I mean? Helping one another, making our dollar revolve in our own communities, having good conversations with each other, not arguments and stuff like that, not being jealous of one another, but genuinely happy for another man. Like, you know what I mean. And that don't make you weak to be happy for another person. Right. Like, that makes you strong. That makes you know that you know what I mean. What's coming for me is coming.

SPEAKER_01 35:20

Right.

SPEAKER_03 35:21

Like, and ain't nothing gonna stop that. That means you're secure when you're able to give somebody else their uh flowers, guys.

SPEAKER_04 35:28

Man, you could watch me, but go down your own road. I don't want to be responsible for leading you under some bullshit. I'm I'm not saying I will, but I ain't saying I won't. I'm a human. So you could watch me and build your own road.

SPEAKER_03 35:42

You might build another brick rope, but they got they they they got sayings that you know what I mean, you never let your left hand know what your right hand doing. Like, you know what I mean? We all do stuff in the dark. We human. But you know what I mean? The stuff that I do in the light, I hope it shines light on everything. Like, you know what I mean? I am not by far, I am not perfect. But I am striving for perfection. And through that, I you know what I mean. I'm I'm gonna love a little bit more. You know what I mean? I'm I'm I'm happy to say that, you know what I mean. I don't have an enemy no more. Like, you know what I mean? I don't want to be in a situation where I just I don't like you because of some emotional shit. Yeah, like you know what I mean. I'm done, I'm done with that, bro. Like, you know what I mean? If it's any way that I could help you, come on, let's build a bridge. Right. Like, like that's life, let's find out what can be.

SPEAKER_04 36:41

I might be fucked up, man.

SPEAKER_03 36:43

What?

SPEAKER_04 36:44

Because I I don't I never not like nobody. I don't care, I don't care that much about a nigga that not like it. I I will just never, you won't even know. I just disappear. I don't know if it's good or bad though. Like, I never had like me, per I can speak for me. I can't speak for somebody else. I don't know what they felt about me, but I never had an enemy. Like, I just laugh at a nigga, call him a clown, and he didn't and I never put myself in his practice again. I don't know, but I feel like that was just a lot of that was for sanity. He was protecting something. My peace. Yeah, I learned how to protect my peace at a young age.

SPEAKER_03 37:30

Yeah. That's that's that comes from uh but see, he was taught at a young age too. So you gotta remember what he said, what he came from. Yeah, when you when you uh get that junk from the people that you love the most, yeah, bro, that make you be like uh armor. That's really that's crazy.

SPEAKER_04 37:53

That's really where the shit came from.

SPEAKER_03 37:56

It makes you put your armor on, and you you start to develop habits that help you survive. And he's built them joints to where bro, I I mastered these joints. Yeah, shoot, go ahead and shoot.

SPEAKER_04 38:13

It really, like he said, that shit really is nothing but survival tactics mastered over time.

SPEAKER_03 38:20

We live in survival mode, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 38:23

You mean it that coming from where we come from or just life period? Just life.

SPEAKER_03 38:28

Just life every day. Like, you know what I mean? You wake up and something new is being thrown at you every day, bro. Like, you know what I mean? All sorts of life. Like, you know what I mean? You just like damn. What we think we could do as men together to to be able to have conversations like this, with like non-judgment conversation, no, I mean conversations to where we just genuinely talk and it's about the man though.

SPEAKER_04 39:01

Like, it's about the person because we talked about like how it takes time to mature and all that. So if the person you're talking to not at that point in life, you're wasting your time, kind of like they gotta they gotta be accepted, it have acceptance to what you talking about. So they gotta let their guard down. Your guard already now, because you know how to talk to people and communicate. So if they don't, you won't open up to them. I mean, you I talk to you, but in the first couple sentences, you could see from a person, if you looking at them, you know how to read. But I'm a body language specialist. So if you just looking at all that, like you will understand, like, all right, and I ain't a small talk person, so I just won't talk at all.

SPEAKER_03 39:49

Yeah, people be going through their own battles, though. Yeah, and sometimes the loneliest place in the world is the battles you fight and in your mind.

SPEAKER_04 39:59

Yeah, idle time.

SPEAKER_03 40:00

Yeah, that nobody knows nothing about. This would be crazy. Because people don't don't don't check on you like that. Like, you know what I mean? And you be like, shh. I think that the thinking that people pose the check on you is what is what bother you the most.

SPEAKER_01 40:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 40:21

Like, damn, man, I'm here for everybody. Ain't nobody here for me now.

SPEAKER_01 40:24

Right.

SPEAKER_03 40:25

If this was somebody else, I'd have been there for them.

SPEAKER_04 40:27

Right.

SPEAKER_03 40:27

Nobody here for me.

SPEAKER_04 40:29

Yeah. I think when you you know how you go around, you just randomly, you be like, I love you, bro. Yeah. I think that'll open the door to people when they talk about their films. You can't expect people to like think about it.

SPEAKER_03 40:39

I say that because you know it's not, it's not her, bro. Right. So, like, I'm I'm gonna always tell you, like, I don't have a problem with telling you I love you. I ain't gay. Like, you know, I ain't no disrespect. If you live your life like that, but you know what I mean, no disrespect. But I could tell a man that I love him.

SPEAKER_01 40:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 40:58

Like, you know what I mean? Because I genuinely got love for you. Like, you know what I mean? And I tell my sons that all the time. Like, you know what I mean? I grab them niggas, I kiss them, I hug them because they my babies and I love them. Like, you know what I mean? I I kiss my wife, I tell her I love her. I'm gonna be vocal about that. Like, you know what I mean? Because I appreciate the love when it's reciprocated. Because you just gotta be, like, you know what I mean? You can't, you can't disrespect anybody either. If a person has that much confidence in you to uh to share what they're going through, then you gotta have that much respect to respect their information. Oh, yeah. Like, yeah, I mean, it ain't about you going back and be like, oh man, this boy, you know what I mean? Ah, bro. Some niggas do that now. Yeah, I know. That's what I'm saying now. Like, you know what I mean? Now it's time for us to be not some niggas. Like, you know what I mean? Now niggas, you uh we gotta stop being niggas and be men.

unknown 42:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 42:09

We gotta learn to be able to be, to help each other. Like, you know what I mean? Without judgment. Like, you know what I mean? Give your brother an opportunity. Be happy for the next man.

SPEAKER_04 42:21

Yeah, that's why they be saying that shit. We listen, but don't judge.

SPEAKER_03 42:32

You gotta be, you gotta, you gotta extend this, extend the allage branch, extend an olige branch to somebody that you know what I mean, may think that you you you're not there for. Like, you know what I mean? Because people just see people and they be bitter over other people's lives. Like a person to be upset with you about you just living your life. I just want you to win. I want you to win, but everybody don't want you to win.

SPEAKER_04 43:05

Right.

SPEAKER_03 43:07

I know it took a lot for him not to carry you. Yeah, but everybody don't want you to win. Like it ain't and what makes us like that? What makes men not want to see another man win? When this person looks like you, you know that he goes through similar struggles as you. Why would you not want him to be okay? Because if he's okay, he can probably make sure you're okay. Why would you want that? Yeah, those situations create situations. Yeah, like you know what I mean. Situations create situations. Rail made sure I was okay. Eventually I was able to make sure somebody else was okay. And it it trickles down. Like, you know what I mean? And this is what we gotta see. This is the stuff that we gotta see. This is the this is the the the thing. That we have to take account of like this works. Let me help my brother. Let me call my man and be like, yo, you good today, bro?

SPEAKER_04 44:11

Everything cool? My man's so crazy. I call him and ask him that shit. Nigga, the fuck you calling my phone talking that? You know he's goofy.

SPEAKER_03 44:20

Yo, he might be goofy saying that shit, but in this year, he's gonna be like, then only like the only nigga that ever worry about me or think about me is hot. If you stop, he'll notice it.

SPEAKER_04 44:34

I always do. I like we just gotta wear, like how we show love to each other is that what you just saw. Yeah. People uh see it as torturing each other.

SPEAKER_03 44:46

Nah, that's that's people banner. That's that's how we get down.

SPEAKER_04 44:49

We've been like that since sixth grade, like just it keep I be feeling like it keeps us sharp. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 44:58

Like it'd be like I got different friends that's like I got associates and I got friends. I have very few friends. Very, very few friends. Yeah, like I have a lot of associates. Oh yeah. Like Jay is one of my only friends. Like, you Jay gonna be there for you no matter what. So that's the type of person I I try to be there for him no matter what. Whether I talk to that joker every day or not, that's just gonna always be my friend. Like, you know what I mean? Because when I needed him, he was there. If he ever needs me, I'm there. Like, you know what I mean? And that's how it gotta be. Like, you know what I mean? It can't be a always uh I'ma take, I'ma take, I'ma take, I'ma take. Nah, bro, when you give.

SPEAKER_04 45:49

Yep.

SPEAKER_03 45:50

When you worry about me, when is it reciprocated?

SPEAKER_04 45:55

I was always the person doing that when I was younger. Just call people. If you just pop in my mind, I'll just text you. But it was times I thought like that, like, damn, like it don't hurt you to to ask a person if they okay.

SPEAKER_03 46:10

I slowed that shit down. How your mom doing? Like, how your wife, how your girl, like how your kids? Like, general, general conversation. It ain't gotta always be about what I'm gonna get from you.

unknown 46:22

Right.

SPEAKER_03 46:22

Like, but some people don't know how to look past that. They only worry about the stuff that's going on with them, and they want you to support them, but it's hard for them to support anything past their own bubble, or if it's not benefiting them too. That'd be beneficial, like that's that's a major thing. If it's not beneficial to them, you you probably lost a lot of people. That'd be the main thing. You lost a lot of people.

SPEAKER_04 46:49

Like, they feel like it ain't benefiting them. If I feel like that, then shit, then I ain't bro. I'm not in it for the benefit.

SPEAKER_03 46:58

You can definitely the benefit joint going out the window. Like, you know, I mean I'm telling you, if it ain't beneficial for them, look, let's see how many how many people we know.

SPEAKER_04 47:10

We know a lot of people.

SPEAKER_03 47:11

We know a lot of people, yeah. We know a lot of people between the three of us now. Hell yeah. All y'all should repost these drones to help us get to where we try and go. But what makes you not want to do that? What makes you not want to take two seconds to do something that could help somebody because it could possibly catapult somebody in a place to where you want to be. But you don't know if you do that, you may catapult us and we pull you along.

SPEAKER_04 47:46

To get a real answer, I might have to ask people that. I ain't gonna even sit here and try to waste my little brain capacity on thing.

SPEAKER_03 47:55

I'm I'd rather just ask you, damn, nigga, why you ain't some people just don't know why. Like we, you know what I mean? It's it's it's hard to support. Yeah, that's why I just do it. Sometimes you just gotta do it. Sometimes you like some people don't do it like out of out of militia shit. Like, you know what I mean? They just might be looking and don't have time. Yeah, or it just don't register. It don't cross their mind to do that. Like, you know what I mean? It's just that's what we have to normalize. We have to normalize being there for each other because there is nobody else to be there for us. Every other nationality got their thing. Like, you know what I mean? You got Indians, they got gas stations and all kinds of stuff. Like, you know what I mean? Little food stores, whatever. Chinese people got the Chinese stores, hair stores, all that stuff. You got uh Mexicans, they got everything. They lawn care, all that stuff. But when you say black people, what do we got? That's our own drugs and guns. Never that don't even belong to us. That's all they that don't belong to us. Like we always lay claim to stuff that don't belong to us. Guns and butter. The block, the block own it, the block. Don't own it, ain't been on it. You don't even live down there. Block is crazy, but you from here and you willing to die for it.

SPEAKER_04 49:21

The block is crazy. Pray for these young brothers.

SPEAKER_03 49:25

I pray for everybody.

SPEAKER_04 49:26

I want I want niggas that's over the age of 25 to stop wearing fucking shysties, too. I've been seeing that shit. That shit is disgusting. Unless you work outside in the wintertime.

SPEAKER_03 49:37

Listen. Like I said, what make you grown? Does age make you an adult? Hell no. Nope.

SPEAKER_04 49:46

Hell no. 64-year-old killing.

SPEAKER_03 49:49

That's why you just said it's grown ass kids out here. Like it's grown ass kids out here. Because ain't no adult man should have a shist deal.

SPEAKER_04 49:57

Yeah, man.

SPEAKER_03 49:58

Not unless you work it in a refinery.

SPEAKER_04 50:00

I've seen a bull probably my age walking with his son, his son, like seven. He don't got one on. He he got one on. I'm looking at this. I said, if that young boy wasn't with him, I'd jump the curve and hit his ass.

SPEAKER_03 50:18

Then, like they make people stereotype us so bad.

SPEAKER_01 50:25

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 50:25

Like, bro, you in here acting like a nigga. Like, for real. Like, you know what I mean? Sometimes, man, I be saying that uh you go up and down your timeline, you might see the chicks on there fighting, or somebody on there fighting, you'll hear the white people commenting on them drawings, bro. I'll be right back.

SPEAKER_04 50:46

Them comments be crazy. I like them. Lock that monkey up. Yeah. But you want to know what's so crazy? I'm looking at some shit. That's the first thing I see. Let me see these comments. It was it said fight breaks out at a kindergarten graduation. Is all Caucasian motherfuckers on the floor flipping all around and shit? I said, look at the comments. They don't say nothing, but I want to get in there and stop that monkey. I want all that shit. Yeah, they be talking crazy, especially like on the newspaper job when they be putting yo.

SPEAKER_03 51:21

They give it to us.

SPEAKER_04 51:22

That shit be making me sick to my stomach. I'll be like, yo, they be saying some wow shit.

SPEAKER_03 51:28

Yo, but that be our fault too. Yeah, I would have kept them too. These kids don't know no different. They're taught by rap songs. A nigga live his life through a rap song. That was cool when it was Jay-Z. Yeah, you see these jokers when they try and get dressed. When it's time to put on some formal attire. That shit be big as shit. Bro. That shit be dumb as shit. That's why I love to see them kids when they do get a chance to dress up like at the prime and stuff like that, which is they be spice ice. I love it. Like, you know what I mean? Because then they they sometimes clothes are your arm is your armor. Like, you know what I mean? The better they look, the better you feel. Like, you know what I mean? So for them to to to not know that you you can be something other than what you see. But I think society set it up for uh, and I think I know society set it up for us not to win.

SPEAKER_04 52:32

We already said when you wear certain shit, niggas start asking you what you what you what you going to funeral, you going to interview? That's the truth, though. You can't even put on a button up, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 52:42

But also, where are you going? Wear a suit to work every day this week. And they're gonna be like, yo, we're lunching. He came this bitch like brother moves in off the wire. He cool, he going through something. Cause you want to look nice. Uh-huh. You going through something. Right, man. He's lunching, man. Boy, be coming in here with you next time.

SPEAKER_04 53:05

Somebody says something like, yo, don't question me about no shit like that, bro. Yeah, you don't say nothing when you see that motherfucker in Walmart and Dockers and a button up. That's just him. Why? He's a different race. I got button up on. I got to be doing something. Oh, yeah. I'm standing out here on the corner with y'all today in a suit.

SPEAKER_03 53:27

Yo, they they moving away from you. Right.

SPEAKER_04 53:32

They start it's they so ignorant, they start saying all time.

SPEAKER_03 53:37

And it don't be that a joker don't want to dress up. One, they don't might not have the means. Two, they don't know how.

SPEAKER_01 53:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 53:45

Because it's you know how many men when we get in dress and go to put on a tie. They don't know how to tie a tie.

SPEAKER_04 53:53

They don't niggas don't know how to tie a tie.

SPEAKER_03 53:55

I tell you, I know a lot of men that don't know.

SPEAKER_04 53:59

They don't know how to tie a tie.

SPEAKER_03 54:01

Yeah, and that's just a regular tie. If you're gonna get intricate, bow tie. You lost 95%.

SPEAKER_04 54:13

You gotta do a bow tie? Y'all not do bow tie? No. No. I'm not tie now. I know how to tie the time. Like a little bit.

SPEAKER_03 54:20

I got tie tie good. But a bow tie, it takes me a while. Like I might gotta go, I gotta refer to a video. No, I'm nice.

SPEAKER_04 54:26

I'm nice with the tie. Bow tie. Oh, yeah, a regular tie. Just give me the clip right here. But a tie, yeah. I tie a tie for that.

SPEAKER_03 54:35

Man, I I I love a bow tie, bro. A nice drunk. I had one of them joints on them. My wedding. I have propellers in my joint.

SPEAKER_04 54:44

I never wore, I wore a lot of tie. I never wore a bow tie. You know how sometimes it's just it's your preference though. Yeah. It just be your preference. I think it comes, mine comes from the oppression times of my ancestors. Just don't want shit around my neck.

SPEAKER_03 55:00

Yeah, that's why I don't wear jewelry. I can't stand it. Like I can't put on a chain and nothing. It bothers the hell out of me. Because I be feeling like, you know what I mean? You trying to chain me. I'm telling you. I hate stuff around my neck, bro. Yeah. And around, like, I could wear a watch, but you ain't gonna catch me with no bracelets and stuff like that. The only piece of jewelry that I wanted to put on was this wedding ring. For real. Like we had this draw, bro, and I couldn't wait for the day to be able to put this drawing on. And now it's like it's glued to me. Yeah. You ever lose leave your wedding ring at home? Oh my goodness, you go crazy. Yep. See, you don't know that yet. Yeah. You don't know that yet. You're gonna get there.

SPEAKER_04 55:51

You think you're gonna know about it soon? Huh? I'm gonna know about it. Ain't no, huh? I'ma know about it for sure, but I don't know about it. I'm gonna know about it though.

SPEAKER_03 56:03

That's what's up.

SPEAKER_04 56:04

It's the only thing left in life.

SPEAKER_03 56:05

Yeah, man. I'm trying to come to a wedding anyway. Nothing like going to your man's wedding.

SPEAKER_04 56:12

I might just have a party.

SPEAKER_03 56:14

Nah, you're gonna have a wedding. So I could be there dancing.

SPEAKER_02 56:22

Yeah, I said it.

SPEAKER_04 56:24

No, yeah, I know about it.

SPEAKER_03 56:27

Yeah. Man, marriage is a it's it's a beautiful thing. It's a beautiful thing. For sure. Yeah, it's a beautiful thing. It got you have your days when you be like, yo, man, I'm ready to choke this shit. Yeah, that's that's but you got the days when you like it no other way. I'm glad she here. Like, you know what I mean? That's just it'd be your person. Especially when it's the right one. When it's the right one when you are the right fit. That's a that's a that's a wonderful thing. Like, and I could say that I don't see a lot of I I didn't grow up with a lot of black love seeing it, but I see it more now than when I grew up. I see. Like you know, you see way more people married with their kids and stuff like that. Sean. Sean a good dad. Like, you know what I mean? Good husband, all that stuff, good man. Like, you know what I mean? But I love to see that, like, and that's that's right.

SPEAKER_04 57:25

I see way more people that I never would have thought that's married now. Yeah, yeah, way more people, all y'all. Yeah, Sean, Shees, you, like a lot of people, T R like all these people, like I'm like, damn, these yeah.

SPEAKER_03 57:45

Yeah, it's it's it's it's it's beautiful. It's beautiful. I love my wedding, man. I had a ball, man. I had a ball, and I told y'all, my favorite movie is Jumpin' the Brook.

SPEAKER_04 57:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 57:55

So to be able to actually live out the moment, like the movie was my wedding. I just watched that like two weeks ago. Yeah, that was my wedding.

SPEAKER_04 58:06

My one man that's married. He probably been with his girl for 20 years. But when they got married, like it was a real wedding. I was proud. Like, yeah, like it be a lot of niggas that that's married that I'm like, yo, like they were really married. Like, once you do that, like you change. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 58:33

Yo, for you. By default, you know. Listen, for the life of me, though, hawk, I'm telling you. I'm like you. I'm like, man, that nothing gonna change. We've been together. Like, I'm we is who we is. Like, that's how that's I'm you. Listen, I'm on it. Like, my brother, like, yo, I'm telling you, I'm like, man, get out of here. I'm like, man, it ain't gonna change. I'm like, whoa.

SPEAKER_04 58:54

I feel like it changed because women are big on security. Once you marry, that like seal the all the little thoughts of not being secure. Once you do that, is like that's all they really want.

SPEAKER_03 59:13

Listen, you ain't never lied, because with my wife ain't played no games. Uh proposed one year up there on the porch up in the vans, and the next year we was married up that joint. Yeah, so like she wasn't playing no game. She went into when she went into planning mode, boy.

SPEAKER_04 59:30

She said that's her thing too. She liked the plan stuff.

SPEAKER_03 59:34

She hired that, she hired the wedding planners, boy. Uh man, Miss Donna and uh the other, I can't remember the other lady. I called her Miss Jefferson, but man, that was that was that was a crazy experience. I'm glad I got to experience something like that to go through it and that that it was it was nice.

SPEAKER_04 59:54

I never in life thought about that shit until yeah, that shit never was in my genetics until like you said, the first it never was in my genetics. I just I'd be like, I'll mess with you forever. Like just like he said, what is gonna change? If I'm doing everything right, treating you right, what is gonna change? But as I got mature, because obviously I wasn't mature, once I got mature, and then like I said, I'm paying attention to everything and knowing what's going on, it's like I I understand now. What stood out to me was she said that like if something was to happen to one of us because we not married, we can't make decisions on each other's behalf. Oh shit, right? Yeah, that was like, damn, yeah. I'm like, that's important. For sure, especially for sure it is, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:46

And that's stuff that we don't think about, like you know what I mean? Simple stuff, insurance.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:52

I'm so ignorant though that I thought about that stuff just in a negative way. Like, damn, I get married, she could go away with me.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:59

Listen, I'm finding I know people might say crazy stuff about this, but I'm hoping that we do get some kind of bread from this joint so we can put some insurance on some of these young bucks. I'm tired of saying fish fries, bro. Nah, for real, though. I'm tired of saying fish fries, like it can't be everything, like you know what I mean. Donate to this cause. No, let's be preemptive, let's get these kids some insurance. That's it. Like, you know what I mean? We ain't gotta get a big policy on them, little 10 grand joints that you know I mean can send them off right, yeah. Like, you know what I mean, or or at least help the family, right?

SPEAKER_04 1:01:34

Motherfuckers made them niggas selling fish billionaires over fish. Fish fries and go fund these. Fish fries and go fundies.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:43

That shit crazy. Nah. We could we could we can help you, we can help ourselves. Like, you know what I mean. We we just stand up. Like, you know what I mean? It takes us to change our narrative.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:56

We don't even know hopefully when we get some money.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:59

Oh, yeah, I already know that. I told you. The creator told me, we're gonna be alright. All right, we're gonna be alright. Like, you know what I mean? This this this we're gonna be alright. I got faith. If I don't have nothing else, man, I got faith. And I know, like, you know what I mean? I know that I can will things in my life, I know that I can manifest things in my life, so I already know. Yeah, life makes sense. This is this is good for me. This is good for us. This could be good for our communities. Like, you know what I mean? That's why I said I ain't trying to be sitting out here having no conversation that ain't got no substance to it. Yeah, like I ain't got time for that. Oh, yeah, I'll pass. Yeah, like you know what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:40

That's gonna happen that week I stay on. Yeah, I don't want to involve myself in no bush.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:46

I'm not for that. Like, you know what I mean? I'm not for no wanna involve myself. This ain't no platform to where we ain't joking around. Right. Like we here, we may have fun and it may be jokes told, but these situations and with with people and what we going through are is serious. Like, so you know what I mean. Sometimes you just gotta let it out. Or you gotta hear that people going through the same thing that you going through to know that you okay.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:12

There's a lot of people going through it, but it's just like I always was taught, like, since a kid, whatever problems you have, leave them at the door, pick them back up when you come in the career. Don't take that shit outside with you.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:24

That's hard.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:26

My grandma told me that.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:27

That's hard.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:29

My grandma, that was my grandma's favorite saying when I was in at home, leaving the house. Yo, whatever you problem you got, leave them in here and come back. You pick them drums up when you come in the house. We could deal with them in here. Don't take that shit outside with you.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:43

That's hard. Leave all your distractions at the door.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:48

That's that's that's I'm talking about fourth, fifth, third. She's telling me that as a kid. Which it was kind of smart because you know, once it gets into the world, it could get once the universe grabs some shit, you don't have no control of the outcome. Cause you don't know what people manifesting or Nathan about you. Right. So you start telling them.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:15

It used to. Now I I feel like, you know what I mean, um I'm prayed up and protected.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:21

Oh, for sure. For sure.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:23

I really don't care how you feel about me now. It's all about how I feel about me. Like, you know what I mean? Like I told you, I said when I get up in the morning, I look in the mirror, I'm okay. And I'm not where I want to be, but I can see myself going to that place.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:40

Yo, you wanna know the craziest thing that ever happened to me a couple years ago? I'm rot driving buses, right? My little break was I was doing like the 123. So we do like a break in Volley Forge Park. Nobody being there. A Tesla pull in there is a chubby nigga. Hopefully he sees this because he got YouTube and all that. I just didn't get his name. And he just pulling there, he starts talking to me. You at the door, he like, yo, you like this joint? I'm like, yeah, he like, he like everything telling me to press the button and get this joint. He like, I got the YouTube all that. He like, I'm like, yo, if your conscience telling you to do it, do it. God uh make a way. He was about to pull off. Tesla got this shit where it shows you all what's around you. And I'm walking away. He said, bro, come here for a minute. I walk back to the car. He like, yo, it's only me and him out there. He like, bro, look. He like, I don't know what the fuck you got going. He like, but you got a bunch of angels following. It was 32 things on the screen like objects that was shown. It looked like people, but we was the only ones out there. He like, bro, you got a million. He like, that shit is crazy. I'm like, and he just pulled off. I never seen him again.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:10

Yeah, that's crazy.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:12

But my mind always does that shit, but that all come back to that shit Marty was talking about. Cause really, I was supposed to connect right there. Yo, bro, damn, what's your such? I don't I ain't had social media. I don't got that shit, so I couldn't get that. But I was supposed to just bro, what's your number so I could at least check on you that damn you get that, John? Congratulations. But my mind didn't even until he left. But when he when I walked back and he showed me that shit, it kind of freaked me out a little bit because I told you how I am about that. When was this? This was a while ago. No, this shit was like three years ago. Hey, how can your grandma still with us? Yeah. Okay. All right. My grandma. Like to meet her one day. Yeah, she a J. I'm gonna take you up up there. You know her one day. No. I'm gonna take you up there one day. She a Jake.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:02

Yeah, she a J. The nicest. See, I grew up with a J. You know my mom. My mom for gap.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:11

But you know how people be saying it's not what you say, it's how you deliver it. Yes. My grandmom delivery is so like nonchalant. Like my grandma don't curse. My mom don't curse.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:24

Oh, that's hard.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:24

My aunt definitely don't curse. She is a child of God for real. Like she don't curse.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:32

I got an aunt like that.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:33

But they hard as nails, though. I can't I can't put it in the words, but you will see like when you meet them, like they not gonna play with you. Like, but they not, they don't have no vulgarness in them, no nigga. Like my mom, like I'm me, but my mom don't be trying to hear that shit. Like, cause I like with Hawks and top, like, yo, nigga, what is you want? Stop calling that boy and nigga. Like, my mom don't be wanting to hear none of that shit. My wife be like that.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:58

My wife be like that. She be on because you know, my wife, she uh she a deacon of a church. That's why when people be saying stuff like uh y'all unevenly yoked and stuff like that, you don't know who got for me. Yeah, what the fuck? Like you who are you to say? Like, you know what I mean? Because we don't match, but we go together well. Like, you know what I mean? Yeah, I'm I'm not in the church. She goes to church all the time. But I love it. I love the I sit down and watch TV with her. Like I sit down and watch, like, I like Jamal Bryant. Like, I listened to, I like TDJ's when he was out there. I liked it. I read a couple of his books. Like, you know what I mean? I'm not one to push information away. It's just you, for me, I got a personal relationship with the creator. Yeah, that's how I know. And I think that I don't need anybody to intercede for me or to explain to me what my conversations with the creator are. But for those that do, I also believe that the creator is so powerful that he can be anything for anybody at any time. So, with that being said, the way that you worship is exactly right.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:12

Right. I worship right or wrong way.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:16

It's no right or wrong way. Like, you know what I mean? It's just for me. I can't see myself, I don't want to hear about Mark, Matthew, John, and I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:23

It ain't even cool. Mine, not that. Mine was this. So your belief, the way you view the God, you mean? Not view the God, view the nigga that's up there selling hope, right? Oh. So this is where my shit came from. So I put my prayers through him. So he sent them to God when you go into church. You listening to him. He's sending prayers through God to you, to the church. But nobody ever thinks about what if this nigga doing? His sins is worse than mine.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:03

Yeah, but you gotta have faith that you don't mean God know.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:07

I don't have to have faith because I could cut the middleman out and touch the guy.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:11

That's that's where I'm at. I don't even have to have that. For me, like I got a problem with any preacher that gets divorced. Because if you sat here in front of God and broke your word, who am I to lie to? Yeah. If the preacher can't. If you lie to God, yeah, I don't matter. Damn. There's no way, like, that's that's that's a that's a that's a deal breaker. Right. I'm done. And they I know they be like, yo, we human. Yeah, you human, but you chose this path. So you chose to be a leader and you want a flock to follow. Right. So you have to be what you say that you are, or be who you are. Like, you know what I mean? If you a preacher that got stuff going on, then say that. Say that. Like, you know what I mean? Because that's the same way that they did Martin Luther King. Like, they made Martin Luther King be somebody that you couldn't, they put him here on the pedestal. He was perfect. And like he really wasn't. Yeah, that nigga loved women. He stayed in the Playboy Palace all the time.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:21

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:22

All them jokers. Him, Jesse Jackson, all them jokers. It didn't make him less great, it made him really a man. Yeah. Now you could identify with him and be like, oh, all right, I got some of the same tendency he had. Right. Like, you know what I mean? But come on, bro.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:36

So you're saying those things would seem more attainable to us if we knew who the people really were. Right.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:42

Like, if you make a person look like they they larger than life, yeah. And not human, then you can't relate to them. Right. Like, you know what I mean? You ain't even trying to relate to them. Like, it's best to just be who you are. Like, you know what I mean? I'm not perfect.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:58

Right.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:59

Like, like, like now, I'm not perfect. But I am willing to help. I do have some information.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:06

Right.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:06

I am, I got a my heart pure. Like, you know what I mean? And it took it it took a while to get here. Because I had, like I told you, I said, you can't love somebody else when you're living in chaos. So I couldn't be happy for nobody else. I couldn't do nothing for nobody else because I wasn't happy for myself. Right.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:26

So it must be a lot of people not happy for their self. I'm gonna be, I just pray to God were not happy with their self. I just pray to God have faith. As long as I do that, I feel like I'm gonna be cool. I don't need nobody that I need people to pray for me, but I think God will always protect you, Oh, because of hot.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:49

Like, you know, he's gonna always make sure you're good. Because your heart, like, you know what I mean? Your heart pure, bro.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:56

Yeah, I I I never like yo, I don't even let people say hate around me. And no matter how you come off, you come off like you asshole. But but I feel like your heart is pure, though. Yeah, I feel like that's the you know, God give everybody their own like identity. Yeah, so that kind of let me know where people like if you can't get past the first step because you not even looking for the outcome. You just like you said, you see the asshole part of it.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:29

That's the same thing with me though, huh? Right. People would be like, yo, I don't fuck with this and that. And then when you finally get to meet me and get to talk to me, you'd be like, Man, you ain't nothing like they said you were. Exactly. Uh-huh. Exactly. Yo, that's what he hit me with. He was like, Man, I heard all kinds of stuff. You ain't nothing like they said you were. We all suffer from some sort of trauma, and it's not easy for everybody to accept help because they don't know if everybody's genuine. It's hard to let your guard down.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:00

Yeah, that's hard.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:02

It's hard to let your guard down around people. And you should keep your guard up because everybody's not genuine. You know what I mean? So, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:09

So you got people wanting to help and people need help but don't want it. I was on how do you bridge the gap? Yeah. I was like that for a while. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:22

This is how we bridge the gap. We got to communicate. Like, you know what I mean? You know the joint, uh, what's that show that come on, man? The Chicago, the Shy. Love that joint. Remember when they started having the circles for the men's joint? Yeah. Like that.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:35

I never watched that junk.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:36

Bro, that's not that's a good junk.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:37

Everybody always be like, I don't even know how where the disconnect was.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:42

Hey, bro, I'm convinced this boy got a casket at the crib. This is fracking. I go to the crib getting the casket. That's it. He wake up tomorrow.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:54

For sure. You never watch the shot? Nah, the shot good. A lot of times, like you would like it, huh? I'll be I watch like a lot like documentaries and stuff, but for the most time, when I'm in the crib, man, I be fucking with Hawk, man.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:09

Let's see.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:10

I go, I go invade his space. Like I go in this room and just he be on the bed on the tablet. I just land there. Even if he's on the tablet, just to let him know. I'm like, so when he gets older and he talking shit, like he knows I was there. So a lot of times I do that at night.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:30

That's why I tell my sons I love him so much.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:32

Yeah, at night, I get up in the middle of the night.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:34

You will not be able to go in there with him. You can say that your dad never said that he loved you. That's one thing you will not be able to say because I'ma beat it in you. I'ma drill you with it.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:44

Yeah, that's my that's my man. Like, even at night, you know, usually he goes home on Sunday nights. I don't any other parent, especially I always got him how I got him, got off, got off tomorrow for the holiday. I'm definitely taking him home. I called, I told his mom earlier, I texted earlier, like, I'm gonna just bring him home tomorrow. Yeah, like I just be trying to get as much time with my even my daughter. Like, if she not out doing her thing like right now, she there with him. She be chilling with us too. Like, so it'll be like this shit be crazy.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:17

That is, man. Family and to see your kids doing well, man. That's like when you see your kids doing something, you be happy. Yeah, like that bring a joy out of you. Like, I'll be smiling ear to ear, man. Yep. I love them jokers, man.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:34

Yeah, they get on your nerves, but it'd be a good get on your nerves. Yeah, I love it.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:40

They be funny.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:41

They get on your nerves, like you'll miss them when they go on, though. Yeah, when they're not when they're not there with you. Yeah, yeah. That's how that's definitely how I be with Hawk. Like, it I'll always be saying that I'll be like, damn, like it might, I probably don't see him. Like Monday, Tuesday, probably he'll be home and shit. But for the most part, Thursday after school, he with me. Friday, every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, he with me. So like them two days, it be like a void.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:15

Sometimes I I go in this room and be like, You worried about what like how he feeling, all that stuff. Like, you know what I mean? Yeah, whether people treating him all right or that's crazy, are they are they are they are they letting him get over, like you know what I mean? I've been training any more and stuff.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:32

I just didn't say it, but yeah, that's everything he said that be my thoughts and shit. But when he's not with you, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:40

Listen, you so connected to your kids that I don't give a fuck how old they get. And I used to couldn't understand that when my mom said that, like, I got grown men for sons. But nigga, I worry about them jokers, like they infants. Like, you know what I mean? Like it don't turn it off. It used to bother me. I look, I'm telling you, they they really my babies. Like, and when they start to grow up, when your kids start to grow up and have kids of their own, oh my god, that's the funnest part as a parent, I think. I don't think it's the it's the grandparent part so much, but to see them having to go through the bullshit, what you think? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd be like, yeah. Yup, yeah. My mom used to always be like, Oh, it's coming, bro.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:29

When I was running the streets and shit, like I'm 27 and shit like that.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:34

You know what I'm happy for you though, bro? Your daughter get to see you being successful. Yeah, me too. Like, you know what I mean? You you and she gonna wear it out.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:46

Was she 17? How old is she? Old is her 17. She's about to be 17 in general. Oh, yeah, she's gonna wear it out. I remember when she was his daughter, Ed, and he was bringing her around this and listen.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:56

When when he uh he she knows he got some money.

unknown 1:19:00

Shh.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:01

And Barbara's always got money.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:04

Oh yeah. They they legal drug dealers, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:08

Oh, we always got money, so it's gonna be a call coming. Like, it's it's a call coming, but it's you'd be like, damn, y'all always call on me for stuff, but it feels so good to be able to have a couple of things. Yeah, definitely.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:20

It was a time when when shit was like when I was I was crack. Nobody know. My daughter probably ain't in though, but I was crack. I mean, I was cracked. I still had like three cars, shit like that, but I was crack. Like I'm talking about crack. And I was on pills. Yeah. I get down on myself because I'm a better dad now for my youngest daughter than I was for my oldest daughter when she was that age. I was like that, but you gotta understand you was a kid. She was just growing up with you. They hot never gonna know the hot that my daughter know.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:00

Yeah. That's like for me, like Issa don't see the life that Jaquan and Wuda and them see. They never gonna he don't see that same life. Jordan is like a blend between because he had he was around them when he was a baby, but he had a good life, he had a different life too. Like, you know what I mean? So I'm still proud of the man they became. Like, you know what I mean? I'm I'm glad now that we can have conversations, they can understand stuff, like, you know what I mean? Why I was the way I was. Like, you know what I mean, why sometimes I wasn't present because it it ain't sometimes it's not the man's fault that he ain't present. Oh yeah. Like, you know what I mean? Your mother can do things and you won't understand that until you become a man and a woman does that too.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:51

Yo, I said that when I was grown, like I ain't really gonna go in it, but like I ain't saying it was right. My dad used to be wild with my mom, but at certain points in life, I used to be like, I can see why this nigga was like this. Like, I see what you but the one thing with my pop, like me not knowing and shit, uh like that he was going past, I'm glad I got to say it, like in the last like couple years, I'll be around him and shit. And one day I'm like, yo, I'm like, I understand. Like what? Like, I just felt like I had to tell you that I understand. And then like a year or two passed, and he was like, yo, he was like, Oh man, you know what was the best thing that happened to me in my life. I'm thinking this nigga, because this nigga was throw the fuck off. I'm thinking he about to say some old hood legend shit. He was like, When you told me you understand, he said that shit took the weight of the world on my shoulder. I said, I became a parent. I said, I never went down the road that you went. I said, but I could see as a man how a day could turn into a week, a week could turn into a month, a month could turn into a year, because you don't know your problems. And most men, we just think we don't even kids don't care about money, but men as providers, you think like, I ain't gonna get him this week. Nigga asked me for McDonald's, I can't get him McDonald's, I'm gonna get him next week. Next week, you even more fucked up. So that push you out. Next thing you know, you don't see your kid for three years. So that's what I was telling them. Like, I understand them times, like, like, and it also made me a man. He used to always like there's a lot of us, but he used to always like if he introduced me to somebody, used to be like, yeah, this hot. This the one I I be telling you that I never had to worry about. That shit used to bother me, because I used to be like, what the fuck is he talking about? Like it was a compliment from him though. But it's me in my mind, I'm like, nigga, if you worried about me, where do you think you don't if you think I'm this good without you worrying about me, what you think I would be if you worried about me? Right. Like, so it used to be like I don't know. So he was saying he didn't have to be there for you in a way, basically.

SPEAKER_03 1:23:20

Yeah, I I I'm getting it like where basically I was I was okay. Yeah, he just knew I was okay. I know you ain't I know you ain't gonna be doing no other ass. Right.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:31

He just felt he knew I got all these other kids that I do gotta. He just felt like I, but like me and my brothers and my sisters, man, they my niggas, man. We they my niggas. Like I wonder what kept my dad away, because my family, they wasn't the type of women to keep me away from him. They always kept the door open. So I I don't understand how how he did that. Yeah, my mom used to always never say she used to be like, I'll never say nothing bad about your dad. You'll figure it out on your own.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:03

See, and we gotta remember too that we grew up in a time where drugs broke our families. Like, you know what I mean? You had strong men that took a pop or something and couldn't come back off of it. Like, you know what I mean. Wasn't like they ain't love their families, it's just they didn't know how to love themselves no more. So when they chaos, it's hard to love.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:34

My mom never uh did drugs. My dad, like he just snorted coke. But that's that was like they weed of their time. I feel like every old head, I don't care what none of y'all niggas say, y'all dad snort coke or snorted it. That was the shit. The way he was listening to all them songs, white lines, that's cocaine songs. Yeah, how our niggas smoke weed right now, they snorted coke.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:02

I had an old head, one of my old heads down third street, man, Greg. Me and my man Mace was sitting on the step one morning, man. We was pop, we used to be out all night long. We popping them e-pills, man. We sitting on the step. Greg said, Yo, he had the realest conversation with us, man, and God rest his soul, man. Thorough it would. He was like, uh, yeah, man. Y'all be having fun on the pills and stuff. He's like, Yeah, y'all running around here, thumping in y'all me, having the ball, living in your life like it's the best time of your life. Like, yeah, he said, Yeah, that's how that coke was at first. He said, So you get the one and then more. Yeah. He said, Then life change. He said, You don't be having time for the party because you chasing the party. Yes. Like, you know what I mean? You cut out a whole section of that drone. Like, you know what I mean? Now I ain't going out. Now I'm just going straight to. Like, you know what I mean? I said, damn, that's real as a motherfucker. I know that started out in the weekends. I'm telling you.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:03

That's how I started out with me for the drone.

SPEAKER_03 1:26:06

Yes, I can remember the first day I ever popped the ebook. Bro, it was on Mother's Day. And was it again? That shit was different. It was a good day. Different. And I ain't no boy that fucked with them joints like that, but that shit was different. And next thing I know, four years have passed. Damn. I used to tell book jokers, I was just like, yo, these joints is emotion intensifiers. So for some people, if you pop them, yeah, if you're happy already, you might be 10 times more happy. If you paranoid, you may be 10 times more paranoid. If you on dog shit, you on 10 times more dogs.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:57

I never took them joints, but perks like they I never could the per painkillers.

SPEAKER_03 1:27:02

Yeah, I couldn't do the perks.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:03

You don't feel no pain. Life, life is painless.

SPEAKER_03 1:27:07

You don't feel no pain, no what? You're a human perk. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:11

Now that I know that, that's why like, yo, that shit used to you, you right. That's crazy. But that shit, man, that shit is crazy. You you really don't know till it's bad.

SPEAKER_03 1:27:30

You can get through whatever addiction you're going through. For sure. Like, you know what I mean, and we're here to help. If you think that you know what I mean, you need some help, come bust it up, man.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:41

You could talk to me. Anybody that know.

SPEAKER_03 1:27:44

We can have a private conversation. You can come down here, sit and talk to us, like, you know what I mean? We're here to help.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:49

I was the perk lord and the weed god. Sorry, guy. Nobody was popping more and smoking more. Like it was to the point people used to be. Like I ain't smoking with you. The shit not even out. You already rule it. And now I don't do none of that shit. And niggas still be asking me. He be like, yo, I never threw it. I've never been a drinker, though.

SPEAKER_03 1:28:14

I've never been a drinker, but uh, I ain't a quitter. I ain't gonna stop smoking with it.

SPEAKER_04 1:28:21

Yo, he said, I ain't a quitter. I thought he was about to say some real shit.

SPEAKER_03 1:28:28

So real healing starts when a man becomes honest with himself, admitting he's tired, admitting he's hurting, admitting he needs peace. That ain't a weakness, that's maturity. Healing means learning yourself, fixing your mindset, breaking toxic habits, setting boundaries, learning emotional control, because a healed man moves different. A lot of men ain't living, they surviving silently, distracting themselves just to make it to another day. But eventually, every man gotta face himself. With that being said, this is episode four. Men don't heal, they distract themselves. Thanks for watching. Like, comment, share, subscribe. You got anything you wanna say? You don't want I thought you was gonna join me. Oh, my head.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:34

All I'm gonna do is this. All I'ma keep doing is no pray. I just pray for the word.

SPEAKER_03 1:29:39

I ain't say pray, I ain't talking about pray, bro. I thought you was gonna yell me. The brain didn't get me.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:51

I told y'all everybody from the from back in the day was starting coke.

SPEAKER_00 1:29:56

I don't know. Yo, man, thanks for coming out. Thanks for watching, man. Next week, see y'all next week.