You Survived, 100%, of Every Bad Day

No matter how hard life gets, you’re still here. In this episode of Cutt Straight 2 It 💈, we dive into the struggles, setbacks, heartbreaks, losses, anxiety, failures, and moments that felt impossible to overcome. We talk about the power of resilience, finding strength when you feel weak, and how some of life’s toughest moments become the lessons that shape who we are.

Sometimes we get so caught up in what we’re going through that we forget everything we’ve already made it through. This conversation is a reminder that every bad day you’ve faced, every obstacle you’ve encountered, and every challenge that tried to break you—you survived it.

Join Marty, Hak, and ReL as they share personal experiences, hard-earned wisdom, and honest conversations about perseverance, mental toughness, and keeping faith when life gets heavy.

Because no matter what you’re facing today, remember this: you’ve survived 100% of your bad days so far.

#CuttStraight2It #Podcast #YouSurvived100PercentOfYourBadDays #MentalHealth #Resilience #Motivation #SelfGrowth #LifeLessons #MenTalking #RealTalk #Healing #Mindset #OvercomingAdversity #PersonalGrowth #PodcastLife #BarbershopTalk #RelWit1L #Marty #Hak #YouTubePodcast

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Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:20

Right. Well, if you gotta know this though, you survive 100% of your bad days. Every day that you get through it, you survive. So you stronger than what you thought you were.

SPEAKER_03 0:33

Yeah, but when you win it, when you win it, it don't it don't feel like a successful story until you come out of it.

SPEAKER_04 0:41

It don't even feel like a successful story when you come out of it. I just got through it. Yeah, I just got through it. What's good, family, and welcome back to Cut Straight Tour, where we're on Sugar Coat and we speak on it. And no, you are not alone. If this is your first time tuning in, welcome. If you've been rocking with us, welcome back. Today's episode is for anybody carrying that weight that nobody can see. Stress, bills, depression, life. Today's message is simple. You survived a hundred percent of every bad day. Think about that for a second. Every day that you thought would break you, but you didn't. You still stand there. How was your weekend, huh?

SPEAKER_03 1:39

It was alright. I had to do it. I usually don't work, I had to work and so that threw me off a little bit. No, I worked yesterday. You know that holiday pushing everything out a day.

SPEAKER_04 2:02

I feel that, but I had a little week myself. You know, seeing like every day is a new bill. I feel uh that's back on the road. I feel good. There's just some stuff I gotta do to it, but you know. Life gonna keep life and I'm gonna keep pushing. You stole it off today, I'm already a little bit. I had to put my uh self back put myself back together a little bit. Don Jaquan called me. I'm gonna I'm gonna read the message what he sent me, too. What up, dad? I tuned into the pod. I ain't gonna hold you. It's really my favorite drawing right now. You're doing a great job at picking the topics, picking the topics to discuss. That drawing really helped me out. For real. It's really crazy how people really just automatically assume everything is okay with you all the time because they they think you got money. That shit be meaning not don't be meaning nothing. And when you got thousands of bills to pay every month and got miles to feed while they trying trying to help everybody out with your own problems, one of these days they gonna say.

SPEAKER_03 3:12

Damn, that's crazy.

SPEAKER_04 3:13

That's crazy. And I read that John when I was like, yep, think let me get myself together. People don't really, they really don't be knowing your story. They think they be knowing they think they know your story, and we don't really uh we don't even really know, you know what I mean. You you you see a person and you judge a book by its cover, but rarely do we open it up and want to read through it. Like, you know what I mean, and get to know a person and stuff like that and know where they come from. We just automatically assume that they are the person that they are when we when we meet them. We don't know what built that person to get to where we where they got to.

SPEAKER_03 3:50

That's the truth. I feel like if people do that, it probably changed a lot that's going on. Just having to understand that nobody will understand. I always tell people that like get to know whether it's your friend, your your mate, just get to know them. They they first respond. I do know take the time to understand who the person is. Just because you're around somebody for 10 years, that wouldn't mean you know them. He still could be a stranger, and you gotta get to know them outside of y'all dynamic, yeah. Not as like a mom or a wife, what they like to do outside of the house. Yeah, that's crazy because that I got in trouble a lot for that, like coming up, because I wouldn't, I would take so long to commit, but it would be like, um man, I know how you is a character, I know how you is around me, but alright, delete me and put you in another environment. Can you still be the same person or under pressure or anything? You still wanna be the same person that so I I take that trouble versus the headache.

SPEAKER_04 5:02

I don't know, man. You sometimes you have sleepless nights sacrifices that you make that people never see. You know that that that your kids don't even see the sacrifices that you make sometimes. Like them joints, like when you sitting there trying to figure it out, and a person may see, like, oh nah, you good. I just seen you with a pocket full of money. You see me with a portion of the bills. Yo, that's crazy. You know what I mean? Like, you see me with a portion of the bills, but they can't see it because your bills may be astronomical, and what they see, they like, nah, this will cover everything I got going on. Yeah, but my life ain't your life.

SPEAKER_03 5:43

Right.

SPEAKER_04 5:43

Like, you know what I mean? So you you you always gotta stay mindful about the sacrifices that people make. And you gotta appreciate the sacrifices and don't take nobody for granted. Like, don't take nobody's kindness for granted, and that's easily done. Like, you know what I mean? Sometimes you do that shit without no malicious intent, nothing.

SPEAKER_03 6:05

Just no malicious intent.

SPEAKER_04 6:06

It's just, you know what I mean. You get used to a certain situation where all right, I'm gonna keep on calling on this person because they can't say no. So you keep going, you keep going, you keep going, you keep going until the person explodes. That's why I said, like, you know what I mean, you gotta it's it's it's it's you gotta know your worth. Like, you know what I mean? You gotta know your worth, you gotta know what what what you willing to fight for. Like, you know what I mean, and every day ain't gonna be a good day.

SPEAKER_03 6:40

A lot of people definitely don't know their worth. Yeah. That's that's a big thing to know your worth and stand on that shit. If you don't, human nature, man, is prey. Just how it's set up. Some somebody gonna try to run over you or devalue you.

SPEAKER_04 7:01

Yeah, it's definitely set up that way because if you don't know your worth, then I'm gonna tell you what you're worth. And if I got to tell you what you're worth, then I'm gonna get the I'm gonna maximize my earning potential. Like, you know what I mean? I'm gonna shoot low. If you don't shoot back high, that's where you at. Damn. But that's that's life. That's what everybody does. Like, you know what I mean? You got people that get up every morning, program, like they will kill somebody because they almost late to work. Oh, you are rushing for somebody else's dream. This is a joint that somebody this is a dream that somebody had. One day they got they got struck with a epiphany. Boom. I'm gonna do this. And they they put forward, they they started moving, they they took the steps to get where they wanted to go at, and now they're there. And they are doing so good at their dream that they're able to employ you. And now you're willing to die for their dream, but you won't give your own dream the same kind of tenacity. That's crazy. You won't give your own dream the same energy. That's crazy to me.

SPEAKER_00 8:22

That definitely people don't be believing in their own self, though. No.

SPEAKER_04 8:29

No. Because people lack originality. You see how they'll be like, yo, this the wave right now. Nigga, that's that's mean that it's a whole bunch of people following the same shit. That's the wave. And they following it. Like, you know what I mean? If you see one person with something on, like the fur boots, dog, you gotta be kidding.

SPEAKER_03 8:52

They make me want to throw up. I know they feet stinking out there.

SPEAKER_04 8:56

Yo, man, I just be wanting to pour gas on the on the ground. And set fire to them joints.

SPEAKER_03 9:01

They the worst, man.

SPEAKER_04 9:03

They the worst. I don't know where them joints came from, but them joints is horrible.

SPEAKER_03 9:09

They said Sasquatch feet. They the worst.

SPEAKER_04 9:12

They not only got the ankle joints, they got the ones that come all the way. So now your whole leg sweating, stinking. No. With a pair of booty shorts on.

SPEAKER_03 9:25

They love it. They love it.

SPEAKER_04 9:27

Oh, I don't I have no idea where people's ability to dress for the seasons went. For real. Like when we was growing up, man, people wore shorts in the summer. They wore shorts. Hoodies.

SPEAKER_03 9:42

Not hoodies. I saw a young boy them days when it was 90 that he had a hoodie. I said, his mom gonna be mad when they call her and say he did somewhere. Yeah. For real. Like he outside playing 90 degrees, a hoodie on.

SPEAKER_04 9:55

I'm like, we're gonna pass up. Yeah. And they not only have a hoodie on, they have the hood on. Like, bro, you really holding in here, you trying to lose weight. You trying to make weight or something. You play football. I don't know. Like, you know, I they lost their ability to dress for the seasons. Like, you know what I mean? They get summer out, I'm gonna put on a t-shirt.

SPEAKER_05 10:18

Not these young boys.

SPEAKER_04 10:21

That's crazy. That is crazy. Like, you know, I mean, that's it. But we don't know their story. You don't know what they go through.

unknown 10:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 10:31

You don't know why a Joker got on the hoodie. He might have got no t-shirts. Shit, don't wear one. Don't wear a shirt at all.

SPEAKER_03 10:38

You I'm I don't I don't even want to know your story, little buddy. If you're running around with a hoodie on and it's 90 is a heat. Yeah, I ain't hugging no nigga with a hoodie on when it's 90. I ain't hugging that nigga either. I don't even trust no nigga with a hoodie on when it's 90. You up to no good. That's like them black a hoodie in black air forces. I'm done. Yeah, I don't even want to be in the vicinity of you. You gonna do something bad to somebody.

SPEAKER_04 11:09

And you stink. Your feet stink, too.

SPEAKER_03 11:13

I'm telling you, man.

SPEAKER_04 11:14

It's no black forces in a summer. Your feet stink. What part of their story caused them to do the stuff like that?

SPEAKER_03 11:20

Shit, you're gonna have to bring one of them more here and ask them. I can't put myself into the mind of a madman.

SPEAKER_04 11:26

Yo, listen, you know they're crazy because them jokers be like, yo, I'm a YN. Uh-huh. I'm a young nigga. What the fuck is that? That's what you wanted. You that's just like Django. You wanted to wear that? You want to call yourself that? Out of all the fucking things that you can call yourself in the world, you want to call yourself a young nigga. That ain't even original. You just put young in front of nigga. But will we be ready to torture a white person if they call you nigga?

SPEAKER_03 12:01

Yeah, I never really cared.

SPEAKER_04 12:02

I don't understand that. I mean, I use it, but I don't understand it.

unknown 12:06

Wow.

SPEAKER_04 12:06

I use it as a term of endearment, but there's no endearment in it.

SPEAKER_03 12:10

Somebody called me that. That shit just another word for me. Sorry, all the ancestors. But this is what y'all for for.

SPEAKER_04 12:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 12:17

So you call me that, you wasting your time. That shit do not hurt me.

SPEAKER_04 12:22

I don't know. Gotta catch me at the right time. You might say that shit, I might flip out. You might say that shit, I might not. Depending on what I'm going through that day. I might need something to snap out about.

SPEAKER_02 12:34

What you say to me, nigga?

SPEAKER_04 12:36

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 12:36

I be feeling like a uh a lot of people, they they use, I used to do that, not to snap out, but yeah, you use other things like you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_04 12:44

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I'm already on go. My cup already full. Who the fuck left this these minutes on the microwave?

SPEAKER_05 12:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 12:53

Now you just anything. Like anything and take you off. That's crazy, though. How do we uh how you go about finding out? What put a joke going through?

SPEAKER_03 13:06

Communication, but I told you they gotta be willing to communicate.

SPEAKER_04 13:11

Yeah, everybody ain't willing to open up. Like you ain't, it's it's it's tough. You first you gotta find a safe space. And finding a safe space ain't easy. Like, you know what I mean? Because now you gotta trust the people that you're around to like not hold your secrets, but damn, Doug, like you know, if I'm confiding in you, this ain't for everybody.

SPEAKER_00 13:29

I don't know how to approach them. The kids I be cutting, how to talk to them when I can see they clearly going through something. You can say anything you can say, you know what I mean? Without are you good? Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_04 13:38

Nah, just ask them a question. Like, you know what I mean? You good.

SPEAKER_03 13:41

Yeah, like you know what I mean. How would you hold up? But they just be like, Yeah, I'm good. Don't ask them, is they good. That is uh shooting terms for kids. You ask one of them young boys now, is you good, he's gonna say, nigga, you good? Oh man. That's how all right, that's how young boys be. Oh man, it's it's crazy because you kind of sometimes gotta dumb yourself down and step into their world. Nigga, what's up, man? What you got going on? Shhh. Because if you ask them in the night, this shit's so crazy now. Like you ask them in proper etiquette terms, they be offensive because you wanna know why. A lot of them don't understand what you say, so they make you trying to do that.

SPEAKER_04 14:27

Yeah, so they so they they immediately lash out. If you don't talk like they talk, like they talk with broken ebonics, that shit is damn near a different language.

SPEAKER_03 14:36

Yeah, I told you three letters mean a whole sentence now.

SPEAKER_04 14:39

Yeah, and they be on it, they be like, bro, you know what I mean, bro, bro, for real, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 14:49

This ball going I spun the joint, yeah. That's a whole fucking conversation.

SPEAKER_03 15:01

It'll be fucking. We understand it though, yeah. That's crazy. You do though. That's crazy. Now it'll be making me think like am I fucked up too.

SPEAKER_04 15:10

We all are. We all are, we all a little bit messed up, and we all play the part in what's going on. Yeah, like you know what I mean. Ain't no way in the world that you can sit back and be like, you know what I mean? Oh, these kids is crazy, and then think that you played a part in the craziness that the kids is going through. If you ain't do nothing to help them, yeah. Not only did you not do anything to add a hill to the fire because yeah, like you know what I mean. He intensified. You know what I mean? Everybody played mystery night. Yeah, I didn't, yes, you did. No, I didn't.

SPEAKER_03 15:42

I never went out mystery, I never went out mystery night or Halloween. Aunt, when you see these comics, my cousin and this nigga fucked my Halloween up. That nigga used to scare me from when I was a baby. I never fucked with Halloween. I could dig that ain't nothing.

SPEAKER_04 16:00

I could dig that. You know what I mean? You ain't going outside for that.

SPEAKER_03 16:04

I ain't fucking with none of that shit.

SPEAKER_04 16:05

Yeah, I know people that don't like clowns.

SPEAKER_03 16:08

Yeah, that should be crazy to me, like that clown shit.

SPEAKER_04 16:12

And they be like grown-ups, like they really don't like, you know what I mean, don't like certain stuff.

SPEAKER_03 16:18

And I used to watch the joint killer clowns. Remember that movie when they put them in the cocoon and all that shit. Cotton candy. Yep. I used to watch that draw all the time, but it always would be one person that they uh they'd be able to watch all these gory ass scary music movies and shit, and then they'd see a clown and don't.

SPEAKER_04 16:39

I'm like, yo, my drone used to be the creep show. Remember that drunk?

SPEAKER_03 16:44

No one watched scary movies.

SPEAKER_04 16:45

Oh never. You don't remember that? Oh man, the creep show used to come on HBO. That joint was crazy.

SPEAKER_03 16:50

Yeah, I don't watch none of that. Freddie Jason and all that crazy. I don't watch that.

SPEAKER_04 16:55

Yeah, that can come from, you know what I mean? That's that nigga. You know where though he scared you and it it's pain. The pain built something in you. That shit kept me away from all that shit.

SPEAKER_03 17:06

Nigga, I I ain't even fuck with the dark. I ain't fuck with the dark as as I don't fuck with the dark now. Outside, I'm outside, I'm cool. I don't know why.

SPEAKER_04 17:19

Oh man.

SPEAKER_03 17:19

But my mind played tricks on like if it's dark in the crib and everything off and I'm in the crib, it feels like a nigga is right here fucking with me. Man, so I don't play that shit.

SPEAKER_04 17:35

I'm telling you, yesterday, I I'm walking out the crib yesterday morning. I get all my stuff together, I get to the door, the TV cut on. I'm like, I said, today, I ain't even got time to worry about what it was. If you hear, you hear. You know what I mean? But the TV cut on, I'm like, okay, I cut it back off and I went out the door. But in my head all day, I'm like, damn, I wonder what I cut the TV on. I said, I gotta go back over there and see if I walk past it. Do I cut it on? Do I got a motion detector on that joint or something? I said, I gotta see.

SPEAKER_03 18:11

Y'all better thank God for these podcasts because that stuff y'all never know. And I don't, I'm yeah, nigga, I'm scared of the dark.

SPEAKER_04 18:18

I don't fuck with the dark.

SPEAKER_03 18:21

Yeah, I don't fuck with the dark.

SPEAKER_04 18:23

Oh shit, well. Outside, I'm cool.

SPEAKER_03 18:27

Yeah. In the crit, it's something about them walls, darkness, and whatever, that shit give off. Every house got a different story.

SPEAKER_04 18:39

You ain't never lied. Because in the hood, every like struggle is is struggle your neighbor. Like, you know what I mean? Everybody in the hood goes through the same thing, man. I mean, I remember growing up, man, people would go to people's cribs and and borrow the basic necessities. My mom said, You got some sugar. You can do that. Yeah, we got some sugar. My mom said, You got some hamburger we can borrow too next week.

SPEAKER_05 19:04

Damn.

SPEAKER_04 19:09

Yeah, you can't, it's crazy. It's real now. Like, no, no, no, you probably get killed.

SPEAKER_03 19:14

You can't do that now.

SPEAKER_04 19:16

Yeah, and they're gonna post you all over social media and everything.

SPEAKER_03 19:19

Look at this one. Nigga out here with all this shit on. He got, yeah, you know.

SPEAKER_04 19:24

Yeah, but she's standing in front of an air matches live. Damn. Yo, I'm telling you, you see it all on social media, man. Like you, you people open up their lives so open, like they let you see everything. Nothing's nothing's a mystery anymore. Like, nothing's a mystery.

SPEAKER_03 19:54

Like how the girls be half naked. Like, oh yeah, that's you think a nigga really like, yeah, it's funny, look good, but you really think a nigga like me taking you 100% serious?

SPEAKER_04 20:05

They ain't worried. They they some some listen, I've seen this stuff happen. Some dudes and some chicks like toxic situations and toxic environments, they love it, they thrive in it to where she ain't cooking and cleaning, he ain't taking out no trash, and they got a pit bull. Oh, yeah, that just probably two of them.

SPEAKER_03 20:33

Two two wheatlings. That's two wheatlows.

SPEAKER_04 20:35

And that drunk probably be tore up. And they come outside and they come out inside, fly, brand new dunks on drones, everything. Like, and the crib looked like squalor, living in squalor. 69th Street. He's living in 69th Street.

SPEAKER_03 20:56

Niggas squatting in that motherfucker.

SPEAKER_04 20:59

But that's what we go through. Like, we we we learn such bad habits, and we learn to survive. Like, you know what I mean? That's why they say, like, you know what I mean? If the world be needing black people been surviving, like, you know what I mean? That's where most of our meals came from as slaves and stuff like that. Like the fried foods and all that stuff. Like, that stuff came from all the bullshit. Yeah, the the scraps that they was given. So we learned how to make the best out of a bad situation. So I'm wondering why we can't make the best out of the bad situation that we in now.

SPEAKER_03 21:36

Damn.

SPEAKER_04 21:36

Where we lose that ability at.

SPEAKER_03 21:39

I think it's still there, but it's only it, it's all up to you. With because your bad time might not be his bad time.

SPEAKER_04 21:47

Right. But you gotta know this though you survived 100% of your bad days. Every day that you get through it, you survived. So you're stronger than what you thought you were.

SPEAKER_03 22:00

Yeah. But when you win it, when you win it, it don't feel like a successful story until you come out of it.

SPEAKER_04 22:08

It don't even feel like a successful story when you come out of it. I just got through it. Yeah, I just got through it.

SPEAKER_03 22:16

It was a lot a time in my life when I ain't see a light at the end of the tunnel for years. Nobody knew, but I just kept moving. But I just didn't see a light.

SPEAKER_04 22:27

I think it'd be the light that we're looking for. Like, you know what I mean? That joint could be bright as a motherfucker, but it ain't the light that you are. So you can't even see that joint. Like, you know, you just made it through a war and you like, man, I'm I gotta, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta do this, I gotta, I gotta do that.

SPEAKER_03 22:47

Nigga, you just made it through the swamp. No, that's crazy that you said that. That shit might be, that shit is true, though. It ain't the light, the light you looking for.

SPEAKER_04 22:56

Yeah, so sometimes you just gotta sit back and smell the roses, even if they stink a little bit. Right. Now I'm gonna give you some some factual shit. I read the autobiography of Booker T. Washington, right? So he was talking about when the slaves used to be on the on the plantations and stuff like that, once a year, like around Christmas time and stuff like that, the the plantation owner would give them time off and stuff like that. They would get together in groups and stuff like that. They would start drinking, singing, stuff like that. Nah, they would start shooting and fighting, I mean, uh stabbing and fighting and stuff like that. I said, yo, so you telling me This has been going on forever. Since the Emancipation Proclamation, this been going on. And before that, so you telling me that we done figured out this is our evolution. We done figured out how to do it more instead of the once a year now, you do it. You got Monday Dollar Night, you got two dollar Tuesdays, you got Walla Wednesday, you got Thursday, Thursdays, you got thank God it's Friday, it's the weekend, it's the Saturday, it's the weekend, Sunday. Oh, we're gonna just do I'm chilling now. I'm gonna listen to the oldies on Sundays. I'm going down this joint.

SPEAKER_03 24:15

No, Sunday they try they go to church to cleanse themselves so they can dirty themselves all up again next week.

SPEAKER_04 24:23

I ain't knocking nobody that go to church. Amen. Say a prayer for me, but you know, we all got our faults. Like, you know what I mean? Ain't nobody out this joint perfect. Ain't nobody out this joint perfect, and you just gotta keep reminding yourself that I'm built for this shit. Like, you know what I mean? We lose sight of that a lot. Like, you know what I mean? You lose sight of being built for this shit. Like, sometimes you just gotta look in the mirror and be like, nigga, I'm him. Like, I don't give a fuck what you go through. Like, you know, I'm I'm him. I'm I'm gonna get through this and I'm gonna be who I'm gonna be. Like, you know what I mean? You just gotta know who you are. And finding that that that that shit sometimes is is is hard.

SPEAKER_03 25:10

I was about to say, some people lack that, like, totally. They don't even have I it's kind of like you never learn how to self-soothe. Yeah, you know you learn how to self-soothe as a as a kid, like a baby. Some people never, believe it or not, they just never learn how to self-soothe. So I feel like people need to tap into that. Yeah, because I had to learn myself late. I was running around too much.

SPEAKER_04 25:37

Still, though, you had the ability to figure it out. A lot of people lack the ability to figure it out.

SPEAKER_03 25:44

Like, too much other stuff going on.

SPEAKER_04 25:46

Not too much other stuff going on so much, but just everything going on. Not too much, but everything. Just life in general. Like, you know what I mean? Some some people, it's hard for them to get through the day. Like, you got grown people who haven't figured out how to make $20 a day. And you'll be like, huh? But it's people out here living that don't make at least $20 a day in 2026. You should like that's that's that's hard. Like, you know what I mean? Somebody will call you and be like, yo, let me borrow $20. $20? What you gonna do with that? Till Friday? You know what they're doing with it. No, no, no, no, no. If you could if you could hold on to $20 till Friday from Monday, you need to teach financial literacy classes. Nigga, because you was a beast at the time. You're the beast at budgeting. Yeah, too. I'm trying to tell you, because as soon as you walk out the crib, you spend $50, $60. Teach me.

SPEAKER_03 26:50

I be like, I try to, I just I be trying. Like people, yeah, you just you just hold on to this and don't do it. Nigga, you not telling me to hold on no money. If I'm hungry and I want seafood, if I want, I'm gonna get that shit. Yeah, like I can't that's I can't see myself programming. Nah, you said you was gonna hold on to this 200. Don't get no water from the store, just go home and get a water. I'm thirsty right now. I'm gonna tell you this though.

SPEAKER_04 27:21

I can't say that I have seen somebody do it. Oh, my man did it. My man Jameer, he used to live off $5 a week, man. I used to be like, yo, you remember Jameer?

SPEAKER_03 27:34

Listen, he had that I used to be with that ran track.

SPEAKER_06 27:38

No, bro.

SPEAKER_03 27:39

This boy, we young boys, we go to Wendy's, he'd say, hold up. Man, nigga go get a honey bun and 50 cent juice and bring that shit in Wendy's with us and eat that shit. But right now, up. He always knew how to manage money. I just used to be like, my brother liked that too. He had had how you like, bro.

SPEAKER_04 28:04

Oh some people are great at managing money. I'm just better at managing it. Other people are great at spending money. I like money, so I know how to get it so I can spend it. Like, you know what I mean? And as a child, I I we lacked it so much that I was like, when I become an adult and I can get my own. Or when I get of age, it can get my own. I'm gonna go get it. Like, you know what I mean? I'm done being broke. That's out. I don't know that language no more. That's why I say like the drug part of it is damn, that's a drug that you never stop chasing. Money. Yeah. You never stop chasing. There is no withdrawal from money.

SPEAKER_03 28:49

I be feeling like though, anything you chase, that shit just run from me.

SPEAKER_04 28:54

Yeah. I think that you know, some such some shit you catch. Don't be the shit that you want to. But some shit you catch. Yeah, I mean, it's it's it's rare that you know what I mean, uh a person. No, I ain't gonna say it's rare. It's just not as common as we would like to see it, that people achieve their goals. Or people even set goals. Like the uh one of the best things I had got, one of the best quotes, or not even a quote, but a bit of information somebody gave me was don't set your hat when you can't reach it. And I I couldn't understand it when he first said it, but he was like, yo, man, don't make goals. That's impossible. Yeah, it does. Like, you know what I mean? He said, make sure it goes, you know what I mean? Achieve that and just keep on climbing. Eventually you'll get to where you at. Sometimes, man, we put, oh, I want to do this, or I want to do that, or I'm gonna do this, or I'm gonna do that. Like my godson called me today. He texted me today. He like, uh God Pop, you uh can you bring me them? Can you print them joints out? I sent you the drawing of, and I'm I'm gonna come down the shop. I'm like, what? Like, you know what I mean? I'm like, what is you talking about, boy? Like, I said, call me. I said, yo, first, man, if you want to do something, if you're trying to start something, then you at least gotta have the discipline enough to learn what it is that you talking about. What do you wanted to do? He wanted silk screen shirts, but he wanted me to print them out. I said, see, that's I said, Do you know what silk screen is? Yeah, I said, No, you don't. Because you're talking about print them out. I said, yo, first you gotta, you know, I mean, you gotta have enough discipline. That's the drawing board over there. Yeah, that's the silk screen. Oh, yeah, he got a boy. Yeah, you gotta get the photo and stuff.

SPEAKER_03 30:45

He tried to put you in the sweatshop.

SPEAKER_00 30:49

I love you. But he had an idea that you wanted he wanted you to bring the light for him.

SPEAKER_04 30:53

Yeah, but you gotta I can show you how to bring that to life, but you you I can't do you your job, right? Like, you know what I mean? You gotta want it enough to where you're willing to figure it out, right? I can give you the steps to figure it out to where you may not have to go down the path somebody else go down, but you gotta want that, bro. And you gotta have enough respect for the thing that you're doing to want to learn it. He should at least know it when he when he brings it down. You should want to learn it. Like, you know what I mean? Don't just jump into something because you see something else for somebody else. Like, we uh a lot of times we do that. Like you'll see somebody doing something, and you be like, oh, that's working for them. I'm doing that. Like, I'm doing like people are it's we lack originality. Like, you know, we we lack that our to be the most creative people. I can't understand it. Because black people will make some shit out of nothing. Like, you know what I mean? I'm not seeing niggas cook on Bunts and burners and you know I mean, shit like that. Like they being in jail, yeah. Like oh, the niggas the niggas in jail is is fucking they scientists, they scientists and and inventors and everything. I'm not seeing niggas give niggas tattoos with uh old fan joints, like it like it go down. I done seen niggas. I done seen niggas make picture frames out of cigarette cigarette packs. You got some of the best artists in that joint, like they draw pictures and that, like, come on, bro. We can't just keep on wasting our time or giving it away.

SPEAKER_06 32:29

Right.

SPEAKER_04 32:30

Like what pain building you? It made me into the the man that I am. Like all the stuff that I've been through, like some pain was self-inflicted, some pain was, you know what I mean, directed. But all of it was accepted and redistributed. Right. Like, you know what I mean? You put it in and you're gonna push it out however you got to. Like some some of it went back in in pain that you inflicted on other people, some of it was love. Like some pain you took from people, like you know what I mean. You'll take pain from your kids and push back, you know what I mean, reciprocate love. Like, you know, it's it's it's it's it's what make you like you know what I mean. What you go through, like they say, God don't put no burdens on you that you can't bear, but you can't see that you can't bear from the from the from the beginning. Like, you know what I mean? Because you be going through it. You be you be in the vice. And it's it's study turning. That joint getting tighter and tighter and tighter. You like loosen this joint, please. And then one day you just you break out of that joint.

SPEAKER_03 33:49

So pain to humble humble you can break you down, boy. Pain did a lot for me. But this is the outcome of it. But a lot of it just all of it was from pain. Even if it was never spoken, like spoke about a name. Most of the time I deal with it on the inside, I don't never talk about that. They say it's bad, but everybody just different. They deal with emotion, different deal with pain, different, deal with how they react to it.

SPEAKER_04 34:22

I just like when I was young and fat, I'm fat again now, but I lose weight. But when I was young and fat, I learned how to talk about people to divert the attention off of me. So you can say something to me, but I'm gonna throw 30 at your ass quick and have people laughing at you, so you're gonna leave me the fuck alone. That nigga always burning on somebody. But it was a it was a a coping mechanism like bro, this is this this don't come over here. That's the way you defend yourself. I'm gonna set fire to your ass. Like, you know what I mean? But and you grow up teaching that shit, thinking that it's humorous, like you you would teach that shit to your kids. Yeah, but now that shit bullying. Right. Me and my kids used to be, we still do that shit. Like, you know what I mean? We be tortured each other. But it's it's it's love, but it's it's a coping mechanism. Like, you know what I mean? So I dig it. But now you do that shit to somebody, they they whoa, they gonna smoke you. But that comes from a new point.

SPEAKER_03 35:34

That comes from like weakness, like the the them trying to do something to you. Like, if you can't take I I feel like like we was we had tough skin.

SPEAKER_04 35:45

Listen, hot dig this though. You got people out here willing to die over respect and don't even know what the fuck respect is. That shit's sad. That's crazy. Nigga be like, he disrespected me.

SPEAKER_02 35:58

You don't even know what respect is, you don't even respect yourself.

SPEAKER_04 36:02

Say smell it. You should have killed yourself if you can't respect it. He disrespect you, should have killed yourself then. If you was willing to kill him over disrespect, you should have killed yourself because you disrespected yourself from the moment you walk out the crib.

SPEAKER_00 36:18

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SPEAKER_04 37:06

A barbershop cut differently. Like, you know what I mean? Some of these boys have no morals. I don't, I'm like, I don't. I do some of the same shit that y'all do. Like, I smoke weed. That's that's my thing. I'm an adult, I'm allowed to, I got a weed card. But just because I can, and in certain places, you can smoke out in the public. Just because I can is not gonna make going. I'm not the type of person to go, I'm not gonna smoke in front of no old people or nothing like that, or in front of people or kids in general. Like, you know what I mean? It's it's you gotta have some respect for what you do. Oh, yeah, nigga. You you got you gotta respect yourself.

SPEAKER_03 37:44

They get that car, they be in the middle of Dony Park. What the fuck is it? Nigga, I got weed guard. Shit legal right now. You like, bro, it's not about to have all these kids thinking weed is cool to smoke because you're dirty ass. They gonna remember the dirty nigga in the park. Listen, and roll in the backwood.

SPEAKER_04 38:05

For the schools right now, they tore up, bro. They vaping, they got like they they in there seventh grade, sixth grade, vaping, vaping in the bathroom. Bro, you killing your brain cells. And you just weed make you tired and lazy. Like, you don't, they don't even know what type they smoke, and I don't see nobody out here with no sativa. Sativa costs more, like you know what I mean. It keeps you up though. It keeps you up, and it don't have it, it's not what they call za. This is what this is what I'm telling you about the lack of information in our communities. Now, these jokers will tell you that your weed is bullshit because it don't make you sling. Because it ain't indica. Exactly. I'm a I was a hybrid motherfucker. I know the difference between what's uh Indica, a hybrid, and a sativa. But they call za. They call indica za because they feel like, oh, if I'm if I'm fucked up and I can't move, oh, this is za. No, you idiot. It's a body high. Yeah, it's a body hot. It's meant to make your body relax. Uh a hybrid is a mix between both of them. So you can relax a little bit, but it's gonna keep you up. It's basically how Hawk said. That's the joint that just keeps you there. Yeah. A sativa is cerebral. Yeah, like when people be like, yo, I'll be in my thoughts. Or you'll be laughing and shit. Yeah, that's that's a sativa. A sativa makes you think. Like, you know what I mean? You could I smoke some sativas, that's when I read. Because you want you looking for information. I'd be like Johnny 5, more ebook. I need more input. Yeah, you ain't gonna understand everything that you fucking read, but you you read it anyway. Like, I got a lot of books that I read and I couldn't tell you shit about the book, but I read it.

SPEAKER_03 39:59

That's what I don't I don't even get. Because sometimes if it ain't really catch, it ain't I'm not gonna retain the information of it.

SPEAKER_04 40:07

I think that's something I could read it, but yeah, sometimes that shit just be practice. Like, you know what I mean? Keeping your brain stimulated, keeping your brain stimulated. So if if it didn't grab me, then all right, I ain't gonna from it.

SPEAKER_03 40:20

But yeah, what they be saying, like that shit good, like sight words. Like, so you you know what you yeah, as soon as you see it, you know the word.

SPEAKER_04 40:31

So it's it it it definitely uh gives you some kind of uh mental clarity to help you. And it it's it's damn near a form of meditation. You ever try to read at night? No for me. I pick up a book at night, I read two pages, I'm comatoes.

SPEAKER_03 40:54

Yo, tonight all the time. Even when I sleep, that's why I don't really sleep like that. I sleep that boys are lamping. I still can feel my mind like I never really sleep. I don't be tired, so that's a good thing, but I don't boy.

SPEAKER_04 41:18

It be stuff hitting you, you be like, man, what the fuck is this? Like, you know what I mean? Like when they be like the low testosterone joy, she'd be like, man, that shit ain't gonna never happen to me. Then you be like, man, I don't feel like doing shit.

SPEAKER_03 41:31

You just don't implement like something to keep it like I I'll always be on up on all that, like the little herbs and all that. Oh yeah, you gotta keep your testosterone levels up. That that's what like so. You figure your testosterone levels lower, it start letting estrogen in.

SPEAKER_04 41:52

Yeah, it'd be a yeah, uh female traits start to uh take over. That's why that's why a lot of foods do that to people too. Yeah, what take your testosterone? Yeah, they sneak that shit in. Yeah, it'll it'll strip you, it'll it it produces estrogen. So, like, you know what I mean? These kids ain't running around here non-binary and all that stuff by chance. Like, you know what I mean? You got hormones that they put in the foods, and bro, I I we was all 12. And it probably was one girl in the whole city that probably had a breast when they were 12.

SPEAKER_03 42:32

I just told someone.

SPEAKER_04 42:34

They be eating that fried chicken, that them hormones in it. You see a 12-year-old girl, she looks 36.

SPEAKER_03 42:41

Real shit. And the young boy, young boy would be like beard six with gray hair in it. Like, what I'll be in. What's up, bro? Yeah, you feel like you were 14. Why you got uh strands of gray hair and get beard? You got a full beard, like you could look at somebody's beard and tell how long they had it. Like, not how long, but from the grade of you could tell that this nigga in the temperature. I'm like, he got a full full beard in 6'5. He don't do nothing.

SPEAKER_04 43:14

Child tendencies, yeah. Like, you know what I mean? Boy, you cut well. I know you be close to some of them young boys. Them jokers don't play water sports, not at all.

SPEAKER_03 43:28

Yo, it's something with the hormonal hockey.

SPEAKER_04 43:32

They don't play water sports.

SPEAKER_03 43:35

Yo, I could go a day or two. My I just never had sneaker. My son, man, he's seven years old. I be putting deodorant sometimes. I be like, yo, nobody don't smell it. This shit smells like every hoagie shop with onions loaded on a sandwich. He's not keeping it.

SPEAKER_04 43:52

That that essential hoodie got. Yeah, they won't be. Um chicken Alfredo on that joint. That joint smell like a hundred different barbecues and they never washed it. You could smell your shit. And they never took it off. They won't even take it off when they get a haircut. No. That's like, I'm like, yo, for real. I thought that joint was a vest. Nope. Like some of them jokers, the essential is melted on them jokers. Like it don't leave. Same one. It don't leave. That's it. I said, damn. I see why they cost that much. You just ain't you ain't never gonna wash it, huh? You just keep it on forever. That shit like 175 outfits. That ain't pain built up in them.

SPEAKER_03 44:41

Nah, that's just that's stupid.

SPEAKER_04 44:43

Yeah, yeah, that's stupidity. Yeah, but everybody ain't taught to wash up. But them jokers, they just come out the crib. They don't care.

SPEAKER_03 44:51

Like they just even if we wasn't taught, that's what I'm saying. Everybody, like the girls didn't play that shit on these jokes. Like, what the ew.

SPEAKER_00 45:03

And that made you want to wash up. Exactly.

SPEAKER_04 45:09

Like when you when you got on the right cologne, you could walk past the chick, she's gonna break her neck. I was just saying that. That joint just like a uh crossover on the basketball court. Like she's gonna be able to do that. But they not think about girls for some reason. No, not the way we were. Right. No. That's because they don't have to put effort in the girls anymore. Yo. Like we don't we we had to put effort in. Like you had to go actually introduce yourself to somebody.

SPEAKER_03 45:39

Definitely had to put effort in.

SPEAKER_04 45:40

You had to be confident enough to ask them for their number and be willing to get shot down. Yeah. These niggas can't take constructive criticism. They don't got to do that. They can't take rejection. Like, you know what I mean? So, and you ain't really gotta look for the chick. All you gotta do is scroll down.

SPEAKER_03 45:59

It's not it's not. She's on there with her mom, both up naked. You know how easier it been for me if I didn't physically had to walk up on you and I could go in your DM. I got time to think I'm texting. Nah, this ain't gonna be it. I deleted it. You gotta be, you gotta freestyle. Like you walk up on a girl in our era, you on the spot now. You can't fumble like you're definitely in a cipher. Yeah, right. So it's like a rap battle. Yeah, because she going rebuttal something, you gotta be, nah, I'm cool, this, this, and that. I got boyfriend. Oh, yeah, I I don't, I don't like, I don't like boys me either, but you know, you know, I don't like them either. Like that, like they could sit there and they got time to write a rap.

SPEAKER_04 46:44

Yeah, and then they still mess up. Oh yeah, yeah, they do the and when they get a girl. Oh my god. Like I for the life of me, I I just be like, I hope that these kids get to live out whatever dreams and stuff they got in their head or whatever fantasies they got. I hope you get to live them out.

SPEAKER_03 47:04

I don't even think they dream no more.

SPEAKER_04 47:06

They got to, man, because these jokers be going through it, man. They get a chick and they be like, this is it. Like they they lose their mind. And you gotta like as an older adult, you be like, man, these niggas is crazy. But you have to re remember when you was that, when you was them. Yeah, like you know, I mean, when you cared enough about somebody to go crazy and all that shit.

SPEAKER_03 47:29

I never thought you was gonna be with them forever.

SPEAKER_04 47:31

Yeah, I mean, I love, but I love me way more than I love anything else. I would go crazy if my wife, if I lost my wife, but just my head for a woman, no, nigga. I can't see it. Not no more, not me. You wanna leave? Bye bye. I'm gonna be alright. I'm trying to tell you, I ain't gonna go crazy. And you see some jokers, I done seen jokers kill niggas over.

SPEAKER_03 47:56

Yeah, I'm glad I don't have no emotion like that.

SPEAKER_04 47:58

I seen niggas kill a nigga. I seen it. I done seen some shit in my life. Like, it's a lot of stuff that go down like that. Behind women. Behind women. Oh nigga, you can have her. I seen a nigga kill a chick boyfriend over over her.

SPEAKER_03 48:14

Like he actually think she was going messing with him after you.

SPEAKER_02 48:21

She was already messing with him. Like, you know what I mean? Nigga rocked the other nigga over over his chick. That's just but he didn't even want to.

SPEAKER_04 48:31

Like, um, yo, listen, jokers are some jokers are super, super, super possessive. And I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't know what what button in inside you make you like that. I don't got that button. That's why I said I can understand some stuff when he be like, yo, I don't got that. I don't got that button. I ain't got that super possessive.

SPEAKER_00 48:54

It'd be their first time having something that's valuable, probably.

SPEAKER_04 48:57

Or, you know what I mean? Some people just be craving love so much that when you get the opportunity to have anything that resembles love that like what you think it's supposed to be, you don't want to let it go. Like, you know what I mean? A lot of people never, you know what I mean? Your first time as a as a wild young buck, and you get that that feeling of, damn, somebody care for me. Like, you know what I mean? I got this my girl, like, you know what I mean? I can't wait to get home from school and all that shit. Like, nigga, that shit be it's butterflies in your stomach. It's a great thing. But then, shh. You're gonna learn from every relationship that you be in. Like, that ain't your first one, that ain't gonna be your last one. And some jokers crash out.

SPEAKER_03 49:47

You ever cried over a relationship?

SPEAKER_04 49:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 49:51

Yeah. Yeah. That shit never happened. I never cried.

SPEAKER_04 49:59

And it made me into who I am.

SPEAKER_03 50:01

I don't think I don't, man. I keep saying, maybe I need to get it. I just never shit ain't that serious, man.

SPEAKER_04 50:09

It ain't that serious now, but shit.

SPEAKER_03 50:12

Even as a kid, even my kid.

SPEAKER_04 50:14

That was your whole world. You ain't had nothing else. You ain't had no cars. You had was a girlfriend.

SPEAKER_03 50:18

I had a car.

SPEAKER_04 50:19

And not as a kid. 16. I had a car. I'm talking about a kid.

SPEAKER_03 50:24

Oh, I ain't I definitely ain't giving a fuck.

SPEAKER_04 50:26

I was duck duck goosin them little girls when I was a kid. Yeah, we started out with catch a girl, get a girl.

SPEAKER_03 50:33

Yeah, I wasn't, I wasn't even worried about it.

SPEAKER_04 50:35

That drove you crazy from there. You know what I mean? You running around in the summer, you know her cousin only comes down in the summertime. You got a summer relationship. I remember serious.

SPEAKER_03 50:46

I remember some of them, them type.

SPEAKER_04 50:48

Yo, a summer relationship was serious, boy. I remember them Jones.

SPEAKER_03 50:53

Because they're coming from down south this year. Or always be that lady in the neighborhood that get the adopted girls.

SPEAKER_04 51:00

I used to go a Philly and something in the summer, bro.

SPEAKER_03 51:03

They should be crazy.

SPEAKER_04 51:04

Look, I used to be right next door to them.

SPEAKER_00 51:06

See the the summer that adopted girls.

SPEAKER_03 51:10

Always be the lady that had adopted girls.

SPEAKER_04 51:17

See, see. Me, I used to go to Philly up my uh in the summertime. And my cousin Main, that nigga, he I mean, he's running around. May hooked me up with a joint, like, you know what I mean? That'd be your summertime joint. Like, you know what I mean? And then it's over with. You right back to the you right back to the drawing board.

SPEAKER_03 51:35

I just I I never got tests. Like, I don't know. I got tests. It's different, huh? I just never. Some, I'm telling you, I just thank God I never had that emotion or like a heartbreak that had me like like fucked up. I I done been around some people, they be fucked up over.

SPEAKER_04 51:59

Like, I hope you never get that journal because you fuck around. Kill some.

SPEAKER_03 52:02

It ain't no need to hope I'm never gonna get that. That shit. All right, that shit, bro.

SPEAKER_04 52:07

They say life changes when you get married.

SPEAKER_03 52:09

Man, listen.

SPEAKER_04 52:11

They say life changes when you get married.

SPEAKER_03 52:12

I'm gonna tell you this. I'm gonna I've been saying this my whole life, bro. I get married and I walk in the house and she with a nigga.

SPEAKER_04 52:20

Oh no. I don't think that I don't think that that ain't I ain't what I'm talking about. But sometimes like your wife could drive you, she knows what buttons to push. She knows you, she knows you different than anybody else.

SPEAKER_03 52:32

You've been around people that that push that tribe. Yeah, listen. She knows your pen, nigga.

SPEAKER_04 52:39

1066 etc.

SPEAKER_03 52:43

Just like though. Yeah. But I man, I just I should girl know karate. My Buddha man. She's a black boat, ain't she?

unknown 52:56

No.

SPEAKER_03 52:56

Yeah. I worked on my mind so much. I don't that shit. I don't know, man.

SPEAKER_04 53:05

You know what? That's that's that's building up tolerances. Like, you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_03 53:10

But is that good or bad?

SPEAKER_04 53:12

I would think that it's good. You know what I mean? You gotta give yourself some credit for some shit. Like, you know what I mean? That you you you built up without being trained, you built up uh an ability to to go through your days and to go through your you know what I mean, your traumas. Like, you know what I mean? You gotta give yourself some credit for that.

SPEAKER_03 53:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 53:29

Like, you know what I mean? That we be winging it with emotional shit, like with with with the stuff that we going through, and then to figure it out or to at least figure out a way to get through some stuff, shit, that you did something. Like, you know what I mean? Like for the for the kids that's growing up raising themselves, like, you know, it may not be the perfect childhood, but if they make it to an adult and then become productive, shit, if they just make it to an adult, they did something. But to become a productive adult, shh, you really did something. There's a lot of obstacles that you face. It's a lot of obstacles.

SPEAKER_06 54:04

Like make it somewhere.

SPEAKER_04 54:05

Yeah, obstacles that they shouldn't have to make. Like, I mean, shouldn't have to, you know, I mean, it's shouldn't have to get over. Yeah, you shouldn't have to take, shouldn't have to go through that. You know what I mean? Everybody should start off on a level playing field, but that ain't where we start. We start way back behind we behind the line.

SPEAKER_03 54:23

Yeah, so you gotta catch up and then pass a motherfucker.

SPEAKER_04 54:26

You gotta catch up, pass a joker, stay mentally healthy. Like, you know what I mean? That's come on, man.

SPEAKER_00 54:34

Try not to get killed by the cops.

SPEAKER_04 54:35

Try not to get killed by the cops, or try not to get killed by the niggas. Like, you know what I mean? Still try to be cool, still try to live your life, still try to enjoy your life, still want to know love in your life.

SPEAKER_03 54:46

They don't have a lot of people don't have to, other reasons, they don't have to worry about that. And women don't even be understanding a lot of times what it takes to just be a man.

SPEAKER_04 54:57

Yeah, I think some women identify with the with with a man's pleithe, but not all. They get so many passes, especially if you're a good-looking woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, like, yeah, yeah. Because a joker takes a stupid bad chick. Mm-hmm. Yeah, like you know what I mean, and that's just us. And we all we all be victim to it. I took a chick to dinner one time, man. She was bad. I ain't even gonna put her out there, but we go to dinner. This was a long time ago, man. We go out to hibachi's boom that hibachi used to be down there uh down there. Man, this joint opened up the menu. She said, What's this? Feled midget? I snatched that. Boy, I snatched that menu so listen. We had to help, you know, hibachi's you sitting around the table with a couple people. I might have said it could be yours. She cries loud and everything. The boy at the other table, he he cracking up, but I'm like, she a dumb, but she she brought about like she got 10 10 10 points worth of knowledge, boy. Like I said, yo, she said, what's this feel like? I said, oh no. Give me that drink. I'm gonna order for you. You chill.

SPEAKER_03 56:23

That's pretty crazy because for the most part, women intelligent.

SPEAKER_04 56:27

A lot of them. Yeah, a lot of them. You know what I mean? In school, in school, it was always the chicks were smartest.

SPEAKER_03 56:33

Like they was always it was like just naturally.

SPEAKER_04 56:35

Yeah, like I was in gifted classes, so you'd be like in A1, A2, stuff like that. So that was filled up with all the baddest chicks. Yeah, all the bad chicks were smart. Because they momming them, like it seemed like all the cute chicks had had stuff like a mom, pop, clothes, food. They was lucky. The bare necessities, and we call that luck. Damn. Starting from behind the line. Right, right, and then you make it through all that. You definitely strong. That's what I'm saying. Like, when you start to look back and be like, yo, when you see the adversity that you got, and you be like, man, you gotta be you you built for tough around this drunk. Your skin leather. Like, we be dealing with grief, life, loss, pressure, depression, and still be up and at them every day. Yeah. That's crazy. Yo, it's it's so it's so to the point that now when you hear somebody got killed, it don't even affect you. Don't even really affect you.

SPEAKER_03 57:59

They said that shit like that. Yeah, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 58:01

Like, yeah, like you know what I mean. It ain't people don't be asking out of out of concern anymore. They asking out of new wanting to be newsy. Like, you know what I mean? They're not concerned for you no more. It's it's rarely that people give you genuine condolences now. Like, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03 58:23

I knew uh that we normalized some crazy shit. Regular. I was like 21 or something. I had like a good ass job, like in Bucks County. And they used to, every weekend, like when we come in, you know, damn, how was your weekend? This, this, and that. How was your weekend? They telling their weekend shit. I'm telling my week and shit. Man, the one bull pulled me to the side. He said, Hakeem, can I just tell you, man, like, you know, the stuff you coming in here telling us that's not normal. But to us, it's normal. I'm telling you, yeah, I went to a party, they shut that shit down, they started shooting this, this, and that, but then they started the party again, this, this, and that. These motherfuckers looking at me like I'm telling a horror movie. That motherfucker said, Yo, you know what you be telling us. That's not normal. Like, we talk about going fishing and all that. You talk about dodging bullets and seeing this and that, but that's crazy.

SPEAKER_02 59:23

That's just the reality of that's crazy what we willing to normalize, bro. Because I can remember nights being out and and joker starts shooting and shit. You you like, oh shit. And when they stop, as soon as they stop, you be like, yo, come here.

SPEAKER_04 59:40

It don't stop. Like, you know, I said, Oh man, to make it out of that though, oh my god, you be scared to death to go back because you be like, yo, you made it out the jungle, boy. You don't want to go back down that jungle. You don't want to take no chances.

SPEAKER_03 59:53

Right is crazy.

SPEAKER_04 59:54

You don't want to take no chances. And you just be wanting everybody to see, like, it's it's more out here. But sometimes you can't see what's what's what's what's what somebody else could see for you. You can't see for yourself.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:08

Yeah, they be more worried about the cops. Man, I can't go there, man. Cops. I said, bro, in them suburban areas, cops don't mess with you like they mess with you here. You could ride around with team. You could do long as you don't break a law, nigga. Don't run it, stop sign, don't be speedy, make sure your paperwork right. They don't give a fuck. These motherfucking niggas, they fucking you just be walking. They niggas tackle you. Yeah, you look like you got gun. How the fuck what looking like I got a gun look like?

SPEAKER_04 1:00:36

A hoodie in the summertime, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:40

No, real rap, though. You yeah, that's the truth.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:45

But they don't tackle that nigga, they tackle the nigga with the tag top on.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:48

Yeah, maybe like you like, yo, you just let bull walk past. Like, I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:55

Yeah, they'll lock a joker up for the petty and shit. And then a nigga that got 19 bodies, he's still out.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:02

Oh, because they want him to do more work, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:05

Yeah, they they they they make sure them jokers be out. Like they the exterminators, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:10

They they want them to do more work. They by let him out.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:13

Like, you know, it's crazy, like we're killing ourselves.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:17

You got a dog and an iguana on their shoulder. Some crazy shit. What the f you know? I shouldn't even look over there.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:28

Yo, look, it's just people listen, people need to have dominance over anything. It's crazy. Why do you think so many people got pets? They just want to rule over something. They want to tell something what to do. That's like crazy. That's crazy. People just want to tell something what to do. Some of the strongest human beings are black women because they make a way out of nowhere. Oh, for sure. For sure. Like, you know what I mean? Some of the strong I done seen some of the strongest women in my life. Like, you know what I mean, make a way out of nowhere. And we still see it to this day. Yeah. Like, you know what I mean? You see people like moving. Like it's it's real women out here that's soldiers. Hats off to y'all. But what they have to go through to make to try to give their kids just the bare necessities.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:32

That ain't cool.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:35

You busting your ass like that, your child should at least be able to go to a top-notch school to change their situation. But they got they they they crowd it in in schools that don't I ain't gonna say that they don't care, but sometimes the budget is more important than the pupil. Like, you know, I mean, they're worrying about funding and and not the child's education. Like that should be your like a lot of stuff to me don't make sense. Like when you see like it's a church up on uh off of uh City Line Avenue. You ever seen that joint that big uh Catholic church? It's huge.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:23

Is it past St. Joe's?

SPEAKER_04 1:03:25

Yeah, it's like right there by St. Joe's. It's it's right down on City Line Avenue. It's it's it's it's huge.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:31

I think it's right before Lancaster Avenue. It's kind of like past uh where Lankin all Lankin Avenue is Lankinon Hospital. And they sit on it sit on the right side where you're going, yeah, I know what you're talking about.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:44

But I'm like, yo, this joint is huge. How how could it be homeless mothers when a church has a place like this? Because if it's a godly thing to do to help your brother or your sister, then why not let them live here?

SPEAKER_03 1:04:00

That's a Catholic church, that's a different entity.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:03

It doesn't matter. Everybody, like, if you we're talking about the humanity in a person, the God in a person. I don't care what God you worship, you're still supposed to work better for the next person. But to have an abundance and see people without and you be okay with that, that's that that bothers me. Like, you know what I mean? That ain't they ain't cool. Like, that's why I don't like for myself personally, I don't like to go on vacations where it's I'm gonna see poverty. Because I don't like to see that. That's not a vacation to me. Like, that's me putting me in the mindset that damn, these people over here going through it. Like, I'm not gonna ride through like y'all a tourist attraction and shit, be looking at your huts and and all that shit and be like, oh, that's crazy. We was over Jamaica, them jokers living. Nah, I don't want to see that shit. Period. I'm cool. Like, I'm I'm good on that. Send me somewhere where I'm gonna see some some niggas balling out of control. Some shit that I can aspire to want to be. Like, you know, I don't, I don't, I can't see that. That's not that's not cool for me. But it's people like that that, you know what I mean, they they go through and they they they make a way and they be happy. Like, you know what I mean? When you see people like that that that you felt been dealt the worst hand, and they still have the ability to be happy and to still persevere, like damn, you really strong. Why some people got that and other people don't?

SPEAKER_00 1:05:36

With the will to persevere, yeah. Regardless of yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:41

Is that something that can be taught?

SPEAKER_03 1:05:44

No, you gotta have it anyway. Yeah, I was about to say, because you can teach it, but they don't have the will to do it, like they just got the knowledge.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:54

Damn. So what what what makes you not have the will?

SPEAKER_03 1:06:00

Insecurities, just not I don't know. Can it be fixed? They just gotta meet you on AND.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:11

No, I'm that's that's that's a internal personal fight. Like, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03 1:06:16

You that's something that you gotta hopefully stuff like this, the path of success is like a cut cookie cutter thing though. Yeah. You gotta be able to bend to the way it is.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:28

Yeah, because a lot of people don't understand, like you wanna win in life. If you consider life to be a game, you wanna win in life. But you you you in a game that you don't really understand the rules. And it's already fixed. It's a formula to it. Yeah, you in a you in a game that you don't really understand the rules, but you you're saying that you want to win it. But really you don't know inevitably what's winning. Because we think winning is a house, a car, and all that. Acquiring fucking bills, that's that's that's what we consider winning. Like, because the more money you make, you're gonna create more more bills. So when you got an abundance of bills and and you've acquired a lot of shit, is that success?

SPEAKER_03 1:07:22

No, that's why rich people be broke. Because everybody be going around like they'll be saying he rich, but he matched his bills to his rich ass pocket. Right. Like your rent might be a thousand, his might be twenty thousand. Y'all the same person. Yeah. When it gets like that, y'all the same person.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:40

Living check to check.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:42

But what I'm saying is, like, do do the things that you accumulate in your life, do they determine your success?

SPEAKER_03 1:07:49

Hell no. That shit don't mean nothing.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:52

Is the is the is the billionaire more successful than the priest that can or the uh the the uh what they call them jokers? The the the bald head bulls?

SPEAKER_03 1:08:08

Monk?

SPEAKER_04 1:08:09

The monks that can pray and and and and uh levitate and shit like that. Who more successful?

SPEAKER_03 1:08:16

Them. Yeah. Because they got they preserved their peace.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:19

Right. So what do we view success as? Do we don't value we don't value our peace because we we we don't understand what success is. Like you, you if you value your peace, then you will push way further than like, you know what I mean, a monetary thing because you could be cool in your mind. Like, you know what I mean? But people go way beyond to acquire things to make them happy. Like, I'm gonna go get this this these shoes because they're gonna make me feel good. They're gonna hurt your feet. They might. They damn sure might be. Oh, how I'm gonna get this because it's gonna make me feel good. And sometimes a person will take that momentary gratification and not protect their peace by thinking that they protecting their peace. Like you'll go buy a pair of sneakers and know that you got a fucking phone bill. You look good, but your phone off. You can't call nobody, you can't even get a number. Right. Now you're running around the place.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:32

It's different now for the for the kids. You you got your wi-fi hooked up to Xfinity and you're in Philly. That shit's everywhere. All you need is an iPhone. Get that shit popping. You FaceTime to everybody. As long as you signed in the Xfinity and you in Philly, that shit jumping. Outside, all that.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:51

That's crazy. Real shit. Wi-Fi, real thing, boy. Yeah. Wi-Fi, real thing. They killing us. We don't even see it. Like, they they changed it.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:03

But if we seen it, we couldn't think we can even do anything about it? Fuck no.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:08

I don't know, bro. Like, you know what I mean? You gotta start in your in your house. Like, you know what I mean? You gotta change the the situation there first. Like, you know what I mean? So, and then it spread. So, I know that if it's a possibility that could it can be done, it can be done. Like, we can definitely change, but it takes us wanting to change. Like, it takes us wanting to help somebody else. It takes us wanting to uh, it takes us taking a back seat so somebody else can shine. Like, you know what I mean? People don't want to do that. Like, you know what I mean? They ever some people want to be shit. I'm boss. I'm out front. I'm going first. Like, and sometimes first ain't always good. First circle through the door, get his face blown off. You could, let me see if it's cool. It's good in there. Like, is it good in there? So, you know what I mean? And you built you with the adversity to be able to push through anything. Like, you know what I mean? Like, but how do you find the courage to do it? Like you can, but what makes you not? Like, if you could breathe, read, write, watch, you know what I mean, talk, walk, and all that shit. You have your mental functions, that means that you have the ability to push through something or to be the ability to do it. What stops you from doing it? Like, are we are we that far? Do we psych ourselves? Is it is it only a mental thing? Is it something that we suffer from mentally? That'd be like, yo, I can't do this. I don't want to do that. Or I'm tired. Because a lot of us be tired.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:01

It'd be laziness too.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:03

Yeah, yeah. Sometimes you just be tired of life. Life beats you down. Like that everyday routine is a mug, man. When you get a chance to just sit back and and and chill, it'd be a lot. Like, you know what I mean? You get that chance to be like, sometimes, man, I go home at Saturday, I leave the barbershop at 12:30, 1 o'clock on a Saturday. I get to the crib like 2, 2:30. Dog, I'm in that joint, sleep till like 10:45. I might not never leave the couch. Just burnt out from the week. Burnt out from the week. And like, you know what I mean? You just get a chance to just shh woos up. Like, all right, I done fought all week. I fought to just be able to relax. That's hard, man. That's a hard life, but it's a it's it's an average life. It's it's what the average person goes through. Your next chapter to win. Your hardest chapter doesn't have to be your last chapter. Like, it's still time to win. It's still time to grow. It's still time to build. It's still time to heal. Like, we got the ability to do that. It's just you gotta want to.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:17

This is my next chapter. I never throw it out of my next chapter. I'm not trying to play catch-up. What's the thing you say? Live in a moment.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:32

Reactive. No. Proactive. Be proactive, not reactive. Yeah. I'm trying to live my life in a proactive state. I create the situations that I want to be in and I react to the situations I want I'm in. And you just gotta remember that you survived every bad day that you had. Every bad day that you had. And every heartbreak, every setback, every disappointment, you survived it all. And you still here. So keep your head up. Keep the faith. Stay strong. Keep moving forward because your survival is proof that you're stronger than you think. And with that being said, thanks for watching episode four. Cut straight to it. Y'all have a blessed week. We'll see you next week, man. Like, comment, share, subscribe. Like, comment, share. Subscribe. Subscribe. Subscribe. And repost. Yeah, and repost, man. It don't cost you nothing to support. Remember that. Thank you.