The Price of Wanting

What if the only thing standing between you and the life you want is the one thing you refuse to give up?

In this episode of See Through, Dev and Roger go deep on one of the most powerful truths in personal growth, career development, and financial success: if you do not sacrifice for what you want, what you want becomes the sacrifice. It is a concept that sounds simple until you are the one being asked to pay the price.

Roger explores how delayed gratification, the kind built through waiting for monthly comic book releases and week-long TV cliffhangers, quietly shaped patience, curiosity, and imagination in ways that today's instant access culture is steadily eroding. Dev connects sacrifice directly to career strategy and financial mindset, breaking down the exact moment tying sacrifice to intention changed the trajectory of his life.

Dev shares the raw story behind accepting a leadership role that meant a 120 kilometre daily commute, financial strain, a relationship under pressure, and nearly a year running on minimal sleep. The return on that investment? A three-year career leap that left most of his peers wondering how he got there so fast. Roger then walks through his personal financial framework, a deliberate, structured approach that guards long-term investments and future goals while still making space to enjoy today.

What they land on together will challenge how you think about comfort, commitment, and quiet success. Sacrifice is personal. It does not have to be forever. And the people winning right now? They almost always out-sacrificed everyone else when the moment called for it.

If you are serious about growth, this episode is the conversation you did not know you needed.

Topics covered: personal sacrifice, delayed gratification, career growth, financial strategy, personal development, mindset, success habits, discipline, leadership, wealth building

Follow us @seethroughpodcast

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome back, everybody. Great to have you with us. Uh, welcome to another episode of See Through.

SPEAKER_02 0:05

We're so happy that you all are with us. It's the last week of school. It's also a World Cup. So there's a lot happening. There's a lot of excitement in the city. Um, Dev, how are you doing?

SPEAKER_00 0:15

No, I'm doing really good. And you're right. It is the last week of school. I can't, I think I'm at that point where I can't even remember what it feels like to be in school anymore. But I do remember that last week of school was like, I just feel like they should just let the kids go early.

SPEAKER_02 0:30

You know, they should, although both of mine have been excited about school this week because there's nothing actually happening at school.

SPEAKER_00 0:38

Yeah, like there's nothing to do.

SPEAKER_02 0:39

Arjun's taking his switch with him because all his buddies are bringing their Nintendo switches in. Yeah, it's like the modern gay boy. Yeah, that's cool.

SPEAKER_00 0:46

I have some fun memories about the last week of school. And yeah, the FIFA tournament. FIFA tournament, it's crazy. Honestly, I I mean this will probably timestamp when we're recording this versus when you're listening to it, but that Germany game in Toronto was insane because they scored in extra minutes. I was like screaming at the TV. I'm not even a Germany fan, but I just it was hyped because it was in the city, and I actually didn't realize how many Germany fans we have. I guess we have a lot of every kind of everything. Yeah, we have a lot of everything here, which is awesome. So I love Toronto. And then Cristiano Ronaldo scored. Amazing twice. Yeah. Yeah. Amazing finally showed up. Finally. Yeah. It was really good. So that was amazing. Yeah. I watched that. Messi doing messy things. Yeah, of course. Uh Mbappe doing Mbappe things. 100%. It's kind of tough.

SPEAKER_02 1:26

Like it's nice to see that the big stars are actually all showing up. It's true. They're building their confidence.

SPEAKER_00 1:31

It is, it is really true. It is really true. And so, yeah, really been enjoying that. And you know, my hot take on the FIFA World Cup and why I like FIFA and I like the Olympics specifically is I have a bit of a pet pee when like sport teams say they're world champions. Because how can you claim to be a world champion when you don't go up against any other athletes around the world? And it's I agree. Like, yeah, when the NBA and it's like we're world champions of the world, you're not. You're the champions of the like of North America and the NBA. Like literally, I don't understand why people think they're world champions. But if you win in FIFA, you are a world champion.

SPEAKER_02 2:06

You're the world champion.

SPEAKER_00 2:07

Or if you win an Olympic, you are a world champion. Yeah. Like you've beaten literally people from around the world.

SPEAKER_02 2:12

I do want to shout out Team Canada, even though they lost today 2-1. Yeah, they do qualify for the next round, which is going to be phenomenal.

SPEAKER_00 2:19

Yeah, yeah, I'm excited. I I'm not saying I didn't expect them to go far, but I would say, like, after I, you know, our star player was not playing, and then that injury, it was like, I'm like, oh my God, this is not gonna be good. Um, but no, that's great. That's awesome. Um, I just wanted to start off by also just acknowledging, like, thank you for even listening. It's been honestly a really humbling experience. I think I speak for both of us when we got into this. I didn't really even know what to expect. I don't even think I had. Did you have any expectations?

SPEAKER_02 2:46

No, none. I was just scared and worried that, you know, what if nobody listens to us?

SPEAKER_00 2:52

Yeah, well, I kind of thought like it'd just be like you, me, maybe my mom, yeah, maybe your, maybe your family. Yeah, which you know, they would just do that out of politeness. I mean, it's been phenomenal.

SPEAKER_02 3:04

Yeah, feedback, the positive responses, the keep going, and you know, what people love about what we're talking about, the motivational minutes, I think, are a huge hit. Totally. Um, so no, listen, everyone, thank you. Keep the feedback coming. Um, keep sending us messages because then Dev and I share them with each other, and it motivates us, inspires us to keep doing the things that you all want us to do for our community. I think it's just been really it's been humbling and fun um to do this for all of you.

SPEAKER_00 3:33

Yeah, and and honestly, I wanted to just share just out of just I had this really incredible moment over the week and I was telling Roger before we started recording today, I was at a farmer's market with my family. I love going to the farmer's market, and I ran into uh an old colleague who I hadn't really kept in touch with, and it was nice catching up with her and you know, her beautiful family. And immediately, like without really me instigating anything, she brought up the show and that she was listening to it. That's so cool. It was odd. Like, I was just blown away. It means so much. And just know that we don't take any of this for granted. Thank you for even listening to one episode, let alone if you've kind of come along the ride. And so, yeah, we're really excited to get into it. And speaking of getting into it, uh, Roger, like what are we getting into today? Like, what's our topic? What are we gonna see through today?

SPEAKER_02 4:14

Yeah, you know, there's this word. I know you and I have talked about this word over many years and what it means to us and and how it plays out in our lives. And I'm just gonna drop the word. The word is called sacrifice. And what we want to talk about and dissect today is what does the word sacrifice mean? And is it a positive or negative when you think about that word?

SPEAKER_00 4:39

Oh, I've got a I've got a pretty stern perspective on this. But speaking of that, is this a discussion today or are you debating this?

SPEAKER_02 4:45

You know, I I thought about it, but there really isn't a huge, I mean, you can debate the type of sacrifices you make, I suppose, but when we get into the context of how and why we're talking about the word sacrifice, I think this is definitely a deeper discussion for the two of us.

SPEAKER_00 5:00

All right, let's get into it.

SPEAKER_02 5:14

Okay, welcome back, everyone. I'm just gonna quickly define sacrifice up front for all of us. And it's really giving up something of value to get something even more valuable back in the future. And before Dev and I really get into the depth of the conversation, I want to read you all a quote. And then Dev, you and I can unpack that and let me know how it resonates with you. Totally. It goes like this if you don't sacrifice for what you want, then what you want is the sacrifice. Ooh, that's good. Well one more time. Let's listen to one more time. If you don't sacrifice for what you want, then what you want is the sacrifice. Amen to that. What comes to mind when you hear that?

SPEAKER_00 6:00

Well, I think right out of the gate it's interesting because I think a lot of people want a lot of things, but they don't often think about the things that they're also willing to let go of to then gain the things that they want. And you know, the the first thing that came up as soon as you kind of said that quote, the the immediate thought that I had was how I've approached my entire professional career in my in my corporate world, which is giving up the short-term gain to really win long term.

SPEAKER_02 6:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:35

And I think a lot of people slow themselves down because they're not willing to have short bursts of discomfort, short bursts of uncomfortableness to actually get ahead. And yeah, I can't, I can't resonate with that, I can't resonate with that quote enough if you don't sacrifice what you want, what you want to sacrifice. It's like a very balanced quote, and I really love that.

SPEAKER_02 6:59

Yeah, for me, as you know, if I listen to you speak, it's it's about people wanting things now immediately, but not understanding the disconnect between the wanting and doing the actual work. Yeah, yeah. Right. And I think for me, when when when you're talking and you're saying, listen, you're gonna have to remove something off your plate to bring something more back onto your plate or something bigger, I go to this word and it's value. I think I need to understand the value of things and what they mean to me in order to make a decision on what to sacrifice so then I can get something of equal, bigger, or more value in the future.

SPEAKER_00 7:39

Yeah, yeah. And you know, actually, if I to give you like a real-world example of that, I remember when I first got into kind of my entry-level job and I was kind of getting myself established and kind of starting to think about where I wanted to take my career. And obviously, money was a big motivation and something I valued a lot, right? Something that I I really wanted. And I think I've shared this anecdote, but I'll share it again because I think it really resonates with me when you think about this, which is what I was finding was the reason I wasn't showing up to the best of my ability at work, was because I wanted to have a social life. I wanted to play video games, I wanted to stay up late and honestly waste my time watching stupid YouTube videos, scrolling through social media, like there was nothing of tangible content. And what I didn't realize, and this is I think what really gets me about this quote, is if you don't make a decision, that is also a decision.

SPEAKER_02 8:38

100%.

SPEAKER_00 8:39

And so what I was actually sacrificing is because I wasn't getting a good night's sleep, yeah, what I was sacrificing was actually showing up to work to the best of my ability. And so it was kind of this weird thing is if I wasn't willing to sacrifice my social life and having fun and like playing video games, in turn, what I was doing was sacrificing my ability to show up to the best of my ability in my career. And honestly, the moment I had that realization and I found more of a balance and I had to swing the pendulum pretty hard to kind of play a bit of catch up because I had kind of leaned one way for so long, which is also not good, immediately things started to turn around for me because again, I started to determine like, you know what, my friends are really important. But right now, if my friends are my friends, they would understand why I need to see them less or hang out with them less while I prioritize my career. And if they didn't understand that, well, guess what? They weren't my friends to begin with. And you can't really lose something you never had.

SPEAKER_02 9:35

Yeah, and I, you know, the word perspective comes to mind. And I know we unpacked that on an episode, prior episode. I think that plays a key role in in sort of the word sacrifice as well.

SPEAKER_00 9:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 9:45

And then think of your life experiences, the losses, and maybe the gains you've had in your life. That's also gonna shape the word sacrifice to you differently. Totally. Right. So your frame of mind, I think if you're grieving a loss of a loved one, the word sacrifice is gonna mean something different to you because you've already made that sacrifice. And then, you know, if you're in the polar opposite of that, in your moment of flying high and you're enjoying something, sacrifice is gonna be something else. Like, what do you give up that's making you feel so good for what you said earlier, which I loved, is for something better to come down your or come at you. Yeah, right. However, you want to define it in the future. And I think we don't think of it from that perspective. The young dev made a decision. I need to get some good rest. Yeah, so I can show up the best version of myself. And I think a lot of us have probably done something similar in our growing pains, right? To reference our last topic. Um for me, I'm Gen X. And I have this thought of when we were growing up, we had to practice patience. Right. Right. So I have no patience. Here's why, here's why we had to have patience. So if I was watching a TV program, a show on TV, and the show comes to its climax, it ends, great, boom. You know, there's a cliffhanger, and you're just kind of like, okay, what happens next? There's not play next button. Yeah, we actually had to wait seven days. Yeah, you know, it's a Sunday night. Now I'm Knight Rider, a team. I'm dating myself, right? All these shows were on TV.

SPEAKER_00 11:19

I've never heard of either of them.

SPEAKER_02 11:20

Yeah, like listen, hey, David Hasselhoff, he was a gem. Was that like a lifeguard or something? Yeah, he was in Baywatch, but he's Michael Knight. Anyways, Google Knight Rider for all of you youngins out there that don't know the reference. Okay, you'll understand. Um, anyways, comic books. Yes, right? So if we read a comic book and you wanted to know what was gonna happen next, you couldn't you couldn't scroll or click on a link to go get the next version or um what's what's the um the name of the magazine when it's the next issue? Like the next yeah, the next issue issue. So yeah, yeah. So we had to wait 30 days plus for the corner store to get the next issue. Yeah. So then you can go with your 25 cents, 35 cents, whatever it was, dollar, and buy the next issue and then get caught up on what was happening with your favorite superhero. So for me, that patience was a big thing because of just the way life was and the lack of technology in our lives. And the reason for me why that's super important is because I'm also the generation that last grew up without the world wide web.

SPEAKER_00 12:26

Right, right.

SPEAKER_02 12:27

And then during my life, the world wide web was created and now it's instant at my fingertips. So there's this argument of instant gratification versus patient. You just said you don't have any patience. It's because you yearn for that instant gratification.

SPEAKER_00 12:42

Well, you know, as you're saying that, I think if I evaluate how the world is today, it everything is instant. Like you don't have to, you know, wait for a TV show, even to your point. You can just binge a whole season in like one, in like one day, yeah, and like literally do nothing else. And that's often seen as a good thing. Like if you're able to like watch through something or if you're able to absorb something in in one sitting. And so that's like a crude example. But I even think of it like now that smartphones exist and the world exists the way that it does, everything's at your fingertips. You can access anything instantly. Like, I was even thinking about like information. Like in the past, you'd probably have to go read a book to actually like get knowledge on something. Yeah, now you can put a prompt into ChatGPT or Claude or Gemini and it can read all those books for you in like less than a minute. Yeah, give the cole's notes. Yeah. And then it's just so fascinating because I think that that patience is actually creeping into how people actually then make decisions about how they progress. And I think it comes back to the topic of sacrifice because a lot of people make decisions on whatever causes the least amount of time to actually get there. But the problem with that is some of the best things that can happen to you in life take time. Yeah. And then what I think is really detrimental is I've seen friends who are like, yeah, you know what? I'm gonna, you know, really go after my health and fitness. And so I'm gonna dedicate myself to, you know, a gym routine and a nutrition routine. And after a month or two months, they don't see the amount of results that they want. And so then they feel like they're a failure or that the sacrifices that they put into not going out with friends to have meals and eating whatever they wanted was all awash. Because again, that patience of this should have happened for me already, it it basically overtakes that feeling of do I continue to keep sacrificing this? And I think it's a really I do think that's a big generational thing. I think I see that a lot more.

SPEAKER_02 14:43

I agree, but it's also the curated content. Okay, so let's just play with me. So you're doom scrolling on the Instagram, right? So you find the Instagram. The Instagram. So you're TikTok, just say Roger, just say TikTok, Roger. Okay, so it's TikTok. TikTok, yeah. Um, get with the program, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So now you're looking at this influencer, and they're giving you a timeline video of their getting in shape sequence.

SPEAKER_00 15:08

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 15:09

Right? And so it's sped up. It doesn't tell you what duration of time it took for them to actually do all that. That's true. And then you're thinking, oh my God, that person got in shape really, really fast. Yeah. What I can tell you based on my sort of journey with health and fitness and staying in, you know, in good shape, it's a lifetime commitment. It takes years to get in good shape. It doesn't take months. Now, people are going to argue, be like, yes, you can do it. No, you can do it with extreme exercise, dieting, etc. For sure. I know I've done it for sporting events and whatnot, but to maintain a healthy lifestyle, it takes a long time. Months, months, and months. Yeah. Consistency. Yeah. I think where people taper off and fall off is with consistency. If we can go back just a second, I just when we were talking about the sacrifice, and I was giving you the examples of the Gen X growing up, reading a comic book, waiting for the next episode of TV. Right. There's a couple words that pop into my mind that when you have instant gratification, these words can fall to the wayside. How do I know this to be true? I'm watching it with my kids. And when I remove the technology out of their life, even for two hours, I see the words I'm about to mention pop right back into who they are. Word number one is curiosity. I think when you have instant gratification, everything at your fingertips, curiosity can fall to the wayside. Now, you might develop a different type of curiosity. You might want to search different types of things because it's instantly available to you. You might want to learn differently, but I do think that curiosity falls to the wayside. The other is imagination. Imagination can fall to the wayside. I'll give you an example. When I I won't say I force, but I strongly suggest for Arjun to get off his gaming, you know, and and decompress a bit. It takes him a minute, and then what he does is puts the you know the controllers and everything away. And then I'll wait five minutes, I watch him and then he's deep into Lego builds, robotics. All of a sudden, his curiosity, his imagination take back over because he's always like, Well, I'm gonna be bored sitting here doing nothing. That lasts literally three minutes. Yeah. And then all of a sudden, I hear him upstairs dumping something on the ground. Yeah. Because now he's building something with you know all the all the resources he has. Yeah. And then the final word is innocence. Yeah. I think in childhood, innocence can be lost when we think of instant gratification and we give too much right out of the gate. It doesn't allow curiosity and imagination to build. And I think that impacts our innocence when we're young.

SPEAKER_00 17:52

Yeah. And you know, what I would ask you to think about is whether you realize it or not, you're probably, no matter what age you are listening to this, you're probably sacrificing one of those things right now.

SPEAKER_01 18:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:07

Whether it's your imagination, your curiosity, your ability to be bored. I have to tell you, I am fascinated that people are not able to just sit around and do nothing. Like they have to constantly be occupied with something and constantly be absorbing something. And the reason I feel that's a bit of a trap is when you think about sacrificing for what you want, if you're not clear on what it is that you want, you're naturally just sacrificing your potential and who you can be. And often when I see that catch up with people, it's it's not a pretty picture. Because a lot of the times, to your point, they just go on social media, they immediately compare themselves to somebody their age who's more successful or who's accomplishing the things that they want to accomplish. And that could be anything. It could be arbitrary, like they have a piece of clothing that they want, or it could be something really deep, like maybe a specific attribute, like a you know, a virtue that they have. But what they're missing, and obviously what the social media doesn't paint the picture of, are the thousands of things that person probably gave up to then have that thing. And that's, I think, what I really want to emphasize. And I've seen that play out so many times in my life where the only reason I'm in a position financially, the only reason I'm in a position emotionally, spiritually, mentally, is because I gave up things strategically at the right times that then allowed me to build my abilities in other areas. And I think that's the other piece that I want to emphasize. And maybe we could talk a bit about this, which is it does not need to be a forever decision when one decides to sacrifice something. No. Have you ever had that like happen where you made a sacrifice, a calculated sacrifice for a temporary amount of time?

SPEAKER_02 19:52

Yeah, for sure. I think all throughout my life I've made sacrifices to gain something of value for myself. And then once I had that thing of value in my hands, because it wasn't a lifelong sacrifice, yeah, it was maybe a summer.

SPEAKER_00 20:06

Yeah. Well, even for that, like some people I've seen, like even a week is too long, or even a summer is too long. But that for me, that's I think what's really important. The one example that I have that I think was maybe the single biggest sacrifice decision I made that in the moment, I didn't even realize how how big of a decision this was. And I think that's kind of the scary part of decisions, is some of the biggest ones that you make in your life don't seem big in the moment. Like they're actually very small and feel very quiet in the moment.

SPEAKER_02 20:36

I think you have to ask yourself, is this a must-have, a nice to have, or a need, a need, right? And once you can filter through that type of thinking, then you can sort of determine what goal to set. And I think if you can equate sacrifice to your goal, yeah, then it becomes so much easier to make the sacrifice because you've set a goal, you've set an end point, right? Whether it's a time frame, monetary, um, spiritual, physical, whatever emotional gain you're gonna get out of this goal, it allows you then to quantify the sacrifice you're about to make.

SPEAKER_00 21:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:12

Do you want to share your example?

SPEAKER_00 21:13

Yeah, yeah. So in my example, I'll set the scene. So I was 20, how old was I? 25, 24 or 25. And at the time, I had just started dating my now wife. So that's a pretty big deal. Yeah. And I had been at this point working at the company that I'd started kind of out of university for the last three to four years. And I finally had the opportunity to step into a leadership position. And I was still living at home. I grew up in Vaughn. If you don't know where Vaughn is, it's kind of like a small suburb north of Toronto. Uh and effectively, this career opportunity was nowhere near Vaughan. It was actually in Waterloo, Ontario. For those of you who've never been to Waterloo, It is like country, like wild country. Yeah. It's like in the middle of nowhere. Hey, there's also funny enough, it's like the tech capital of Ontario. Yeah, it is. Yeah, if you're into tech BlackBerries in Waterloo, we have a bunch of tech companies in Waterloo. It's like the Silicon Valley of Ontario. But what was really fascinating about that is in order for me to accept this position, it would have involved me making two really big decisions. A, I would have had to move out, which would have been a financial, like a big financial decision. Yeah. Because you'd be paying rent and you know all the things that come with moving out and all of that, number one. Or number two, I would have to drive every day from Vaughn to Waterloo and back, which how long is it? I think it was like 123 kilometers one way. So I do that twice.

SPEAKER_01 22:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 22:49

And then you think of the time, the gas, all the other expenses that come with five times a week. Five times a week. And so I remember when I was discussing this with my family and my friends, every single one of them was like, This is a terrible decision. Like, don't, don't, why would you even entertain that? It was, they felt it was shocking for me to even think about accepting this opportunity. But in my head, the thing that I wanted more than anything was to actually accelerate my career. That was the thing I valued at that time. I think I valued that more than anyone else, which makes sense because when you're the person that has to make the sacrifice, you're the only one that really understands the value of things. Yeah, the cost. Nobody understands that. No, no spouse, no friend, no best friend, no sibling, no parent. Like they can kind of get it, but like you're the one that's living it. And what was so clear to me is that if I chose not to take this position, there was no guarantee when another opportunity like this would present itself. And in my brain, what didn't sit well with me was this idea of being ready for something, and because of an arbitrary reason like money and time, not actually taking a step that actually put me in a position that could accelerate my career, which nobody understood. And so, through to the dismay of everyone, I accepted that job. And for a full year of my life, I decided to drive every single day 119 kilometers. It took me like an hour and 20 minutes one way. I would work nine hours at this job.

SPEAKER_01 24:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:19

And then I drive an hour and a half every single day home, whether it was raining, whether it was winter, which in Canada the winters are really harsh. And so what did I sacrifice? Well, I didn't sleep much that year. I actually didn't even make money in the move because the expenses that it costed me to pump my car. For sure. I actually lost $5,000 a month in order for me to take care of it. Yeah. So even getting a raise with my promotion, I lost money. So financially it made no sense. It didn't make any sense from a like a time perspective. And most importantly, I was in a new relationship. So I was also like exhausted. So it wasn't like one of those things where like you can catch up with somebody after work or you know anything like that. I was, I was trying to get home to get to sleep so I could restart. Because the other component is I needed to do a good job. I signed up to take on more responsibility. And guess what? When you get promoted, you have to get better.

SPEAKER_01 25:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:10

If you get promoted and you get worse, that is a death sentence. Like you basically should quit your job. You got it. Yeah. And so I see so many people that get promoted and they actually go backwards, which is like, what a waste of time. You're not worth the money. And so basically, I did that for a full year. And in hindsight, if I did not make that decision, the next time there was a leadership opportunity of the same caliber was three years later. That decision would have slowed me down by three years. Wow. Three years if I didn't decide for a year of my life to give up my time, my gas money, and my sleep. And in return, that one year completely shifted the dynamic because I was then in a strategic position where I now had more career options. Cause I also took that year to really rebuild my career, to really learn how I could perform to the best of my ability. And that really blossomed and allowed me to kind of domino effect into a lot of other great promotions and career moves, which to be honest, a lot of people were a little shocked that I was even getting because it wasn't really um, it wasn't a common thing at the organization that I was at to move this quickly. But a lot of people that weren't moving were because they didn't want to sacrifice anything. They just wanted everything to come to them.

SPEAKER_02 26:21

Well, you know, it for me comes back to this concept of shooting your shot. Yeah. Right. And if you're not willing to shoot your shot, and like listen, if you don't practice and you don't hit the shot, well, at least you tried. But the whole concept of shooting your shot is to have the confidence to make to make it in yourself.

SPEAKER_00 26:39

You gotta believe that you could make the shot 100%. And then try. I mean, if you don't even try, then you've already lost. But actually, that brings up another interesting thing as you say that. What I also want you to hear in that story is I also gave myself a definitive amount of time as to when I was willing to sacrifice those things. So for me, after a year doing that drive, I thought to myself, okay, I felt really good about sacrificing my personal life, my time, my energy to really dedicate it to my career. Well, I'm not, I'm not willing to sacrifice that anymore. And so after a year of doing that job, I asked myself, is this still what I want? And the answer was no. What I wanted now at that point was I wanted to, you know, settle down, quote unquote. I wanted to get married. I wanted to look at actually putting roots down somewhere. And so in my head, I'm going, okay, well, that's now what I value. So what am I willing to sacrifice? Well, my career. And so then I asked to transfer.

SPEAKER_01 27:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 27:35

And I was totally okay if they're like, well, there's no other job for you. Well, okay, well, I'm taking a demotion because again, I'm not, I'm not willing to sacrifice all these other personal things that I now want in the sake of my career. And I was okay to switch that pendulum and and then, you know, kind of ride things aloud. Now, thankfully that didn't need to happen for me, but yeah, it was a decision I was totally willing to make.

SPEAKER_02 27:55

Well, I think for you know, for you, without the goals or the milestones, what are you exactly sacrificing? Yeah. Right. And then structure, having a game plan, making the sacrifice meaningful, not just random. So for you, in one moment it was sacrificing comfort to accelerate career. Yeah. And then in the next moment, it was the polar opposite. I need the comfort back in my life now. Yes. And I'm willing to sacrifice the career growth, right? And not a lot of people think like that or are willing to make those hard decisions.

SPEAKER_00 28:28

Well, you know, the really strange part is I'm now in my 30s. I turned 33 a couple of weeks ago. And what's really bizarre are all of my friends from high school and things like that are basically now realizing that because they didn't make those sacrifices early in their life, they now need to make it later in their life. Right. And they hate themselves for it because now they have two things that they value equally. Right. But back then, to be honest, like they don't even keep up with most of the people that they hung out with back then. But they valued them so much that they spent all their time, money, energy, blah, blah, blah. And so that's, I think, the really strange part. And I thought, you know, when you said that, I think it's really important for you to ask yourself is like, at what point are you willing to just make a temporary adjustment to your lifestyle to gain something fruitful that it'll set you up and future you, I can promise you, will thank you for it 100% of the time.

SPEAKER_02 29:25

Yeah. And I, you know, for me, it's just the offset. Right. I I think of I want something, I need something, I'm gonna go do something. I have to offset something today in order for that to be set up in the future.

SPEAKER_00 29:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 29:38

And for a lot of folks, they're not willing to see that. You know, it's the age-old thing. Like I remember my parents trying to lecture me around, you know, if you're gonna stay up late, you're not gonna show up to school the best. My dad would be like, hey, listen, you and your brother wanted a basketball hoop at the front yard so you could practice. But if you don't go out there and practice, well, you're not gonna be as good when you're actually playing the game. Right, right. For the high school team. Yeah, right. Right. And same thing with hockey, right? Like I beat his poor garage walls and the basement walls up with hockey pucks taking shots and sort of, you know, farting around downstairs, practicing and getting things right. So when I actually showed up for game time, I was able to play the way I needed to play, right? And yeah, yeah, I don't know that I practiced the way I should have, right? In order to accelerate those kind of things. But, you know, now in life, I realize that if I don't make those small sacrifices, I'm not gonna get the things that I might want or need. You know, the example I'll give is I have this thing, and like a lot of you, right? I'm figuring out my life goals, what's my strategy to save for retirement, all of that stuff. But in the meantime, I also need to live my life and have fun. Yeah. So I have this thing, I I named it many, many years ago. It's called the Roger Fun Fund. Fun fund. Fun fund. The Roger Fun Fund. Yeah. And so really how that plays out is in order to plan for the future, my kids, you know, their education, um, the needs of life, a mortgage, groceries, bills, I I make sure all of that's in order. I also make sure that some sort of investment strategy is in order. And when all of those things are met, if there's any money left over, it goes into this bucket called the fund fund. The fund fund. Okay. So it could be $50. Maybe it's a good week. Maybe I got bonused out and now it's $500. I don't know. But the idea is to keep this money aside. So then when I do feel like splurging on something, I don't have to think twice about it because all the other things and the goals I set for myself are already being met. Right. So I've built this structure on making sure I'm meeting the things. You know, I don't want to be your friend five years from now, regretting the decisions I made because they're going to be impacting me negatively at that age. Yeah. So I'm making those sacrifices today. So then tomorrow I can actually have that fruitful, hopefully, retirement, right? That makes sense. And so then what I do with the fund fund is I buy car parts, right? So I don't think we've talked about cars on the show yet. No, not yet. That's a whole different topic.

SPEAKER_00 32:09

That is a whole different topic.

SPEAKER_02 32:10

So, anyways, that was my example of building a routine and structure around your sacrifices so that it's not always heavy and weighing on you, so that you can release and maybe go out and splurge and do what you know what it is that you want to do with the time and um resources that you have.

SPEAKER_00 32:26

You know, I think this is a really good kind of sentiment that you're sharing, which for me, what it really sparked is you don't know what's important to other people. And so something that you may not see as a sacrifice doesn't mean it's not a big sacrifice for that other person. Well said. Like, and I I will say that if you know me five years ago, I didn't have this opinion. This is something that I've learned and really seen differently as I've aged, which is I now have a lot of respect that people need different avenues in their life that I probably didn't need myself. And because those things allowed them to have, you know, a mental break or a physical break or an emotional break, sacrificing it, even from my vantage point, seemed like this seems so silly. Like I would give this up in like less than 10 seconds, because in my reality, this was not important to me. Yeah, is actually like huge for them. Like, and I remember thinking this mainly with a lot of my buddies that went and played sports, kind of like you were mentioning, like hockey and basketball.

SPEAKER_01 33:31

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 33:32

When I would look at them and I'd be like, yo, like, why would you join this like recreational basketball league and like pretend like like this is not you're not getting paid, you're not getting sponsored, nobody's watching you play. You're not living the dream. Like nobody, like it's not like it's not there's nothing for me that appealed to me about that. So in my brain, whenever they were like, I'm so overwhelmed, I'm so busy, the thing that would go in my head is like, why don't they just give up playing this recreational basketball and they would get all this time back because they were spending three hours of practice and then five hours on the games, and then they were paying so much money to go to these tournaments. And I'm like, Do you get paid? Do you win money? Like, is there some incentive? No, they just do it for the love of the game.

SPEAKER_02 34:10

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 34:11

But in my brain, I was thinking when you have all these other life issues going on, whether it's like health issues with family members or career problems or whatever the case may be, it's easy to judge externally on like, oh, they should just give this thing up, they should just give that thing up. And like that's the thing that I also want to just really preface is sacrifice is deeply personal. And something that you may not understand could be like a huge sacrifice for someone.

SPEAKER_02 34:37

Well, it's a release for that person. Maybe they are carrying all this weight. And in order to continue to be the rock, if you will, right, for their family, for themselves, they need some sort of avenue to release, reset, and come back refreshed. And I think maybe, you know, I don't want to use the word escapism, but there is a moment where you need to escape from the harsh realities of your surroundings in order for you to reset. And for a lot of people, it's meditation. Yeah. Right? They go internal. Yeah. For a lot of people, it's exercise. For me, if I go more than two days without working out, I don't feel right. So I have to go in and crush a workout and beat my body up because that's just the way I mentally and physically reset myself and my energy. And so I can I can resonate with these people that are out there playing sports. Yeah. Because it's a way for them to reset.

SPEAKER_00 35:30

Yeah, but I I say that even like people that I see that aren't able to sacrifice. I know this sounds ridiculous, but like who need to shop or who need to buy something or who need to drink a coffee first thing in the morning. For me, it's like, oh, like you, you feel bad. Why don't you just give that thing up? It's gonna fix the problem. Yeah, but like I just want to just reiterate like, sacrifice is different for everyone, but the sentiment still stands. Sometimes you do have to sacrifice something that you really value to, again, give yourself the space, the energy, and the time to actually get something in return. And so, with that, uh, as we conclude today's episode, I wanted uh to tee Roger up, um, who's gonna do our motivational minute. And if this is your first time listening, motivational minute is just kind of something that we come up with where we want to give you something that resonates a lot with us, something that really helped motivate us this week or gave us uh a good perspective shift. And so uh we're gonna close things out here with this motivational minute. And uh thank you so much for listening, and uh, we'll see you next time. Over to you, Roger.

SPEAKER_02 36:36

You know, we share a lot of our own stories on this podcast. The messy chapters, the unexpected wins, and the brutal plot twists that life throws at us. And if there's one thing we've learned from looking back at our own lives, it's this the hardest seasons are never just empty space, they are classrooms. The good times give us joy, but the tough times, they give us depth. When you are in the middle of a life-altering event, whether it is a beautiful breakthrough or a painful loss, it is easy to feel overwhelmed. We have both sat in that exact scene, wondering how to navigate the shift. But self-growth isn't about navigating life perfectly, it is about building the resilience to stay anchored when the storm hits, and then the humility to stay grounded when you are flying high. So, how do we actually practice this in real life? Well, we want to give you two simple tools to try today. First, practice active reflection. So tonight, look at your day and ask, what did this day teach me? Don't just live your life, audit it. Second, practice microboundaries. When life gets chaotic, you cannot control everything. Control your next hour. Protect your peace by saying no to the things that drain your battery. Growth is a slow burn. You don't wake up transformed, you wake up and make one small intentional choice at a time. Your past experiences are not anchor weights holding you back, they are the blueprint for who you are becoming. Thank you for walking this journey with us. Take those tips, put them into practice, and we will see you on the next episode.