What To Believe
Most of what we believe was never actually chosen — we just find ourselves with it, then defend it to the death. In other words, we don't defend ideas because they're true; we defend them because they're ours. What to Believe is where former journalist turned master coach Neil Bierbaum exposes the bug in the human operating system — a bug that makes it hard for us to face the truth about ourselves, and keeps us believing and chasing things that are not real and don’t matter. He offers a method for looking at oneself and life more objectively, to find signal within the noise, and deal with what’s real and what matters.
Fans of Stoicism will find their next level here in the form of ontological coaching, the field in which Neil spent a four-year apprenticeship, and which he has spent two decades — more than 10,000 hours — practicing and teaching. It’s a method for looking at oneself and life more objectively, to find signal within the noise, and deal with what’s real and what matters.
Neil offers a solid foundation drawn from more than 20 years of coaching, 10 years before that as a journalist, and decades of contemplative practice running through both. (Neil also has an academic master’s degree, out of which he won a research award and published a peer-reviewed paper on executive coaching methods.) His methodology integrates ontological coaching, neuroscience-backed mindfulness, and evidence-based psychology.
Three formats: solo deep dives, listener Q&A, and live coaching conversations.
New episodes Sunday mornings. Come skeptical. Stay curious.
What To Believe
Why Everybody's Right And Nobody's Listening
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We don't argue an idea because it's true. We argue it because it's ours.
In this, the pilot episode of What to Believe, I introduce the central insight that I've spent twenty years testing — that there's a flaw in the human operating system that keeps us defending positions we didn't choose, mistaking our identity for the truth, and arguing for our own limitations.
Through a series of analogies (the elbow, the bicycle, the bath) and a personal example from my first marriage, I work through why feedback on our personality gets treated differently than feedback on our body, what real self-mastery looks like in practice, and why traditional methods for exposing this flaw required four-day contained trainings.
Then: why nothing about today's polarisation will shift until enough of us learn to give up the need to be right.
This is the foundational episode of the series. Everything that follows builds on it.
Hosted by Neil Bierbaum — former investigative journalist, master coach (ICF MCC), MPhil Leadership Coaching (cum laude), faculty member at Stellenbosch Business School. New episodes Sunday mornings.
Come sceptical. Stay curious.
DONATE — Support this work: https://paypal.me/whattobelieve SUBSTACK — Written companions and bonus features: https://substack.com/@neilbierbaum COURSES — Deep-dive focused topics: https://neilbierbaum.com/self-coaching-online-personal-landing-page/ BOOKS — In-depth material: https://www.amazon.com/Neil-Bierbaum/e/B079TYRSQG ENGAGE — Work with me directly: https://neilbierbaum.com