What To Believe
Most of what we believe was never actually chosen — we just find ourselves with it, then defend it to the death. In other words, we don't defend ideas because they're true; we defend them because they're ours. What to Believe is where former journalist turned master coach Neil Bierbaum exposes the bug in the human operating system — a bug that makes it hard for us to face the truth about ourselves, and keeps us believing and chasing things that are not real and don’t matter. He offers a method for looking at oneself and life more objectively, to find signal within the noise, and deal with what’s real and what matters.
Fans of Stoicism will find their next level here in the form of ontological coaching, the field in which Neil spent a four-year apprenticeship, and which he has spent two decades — more than 10,000 hours — practicing and teaching. It’s a method for looking at oneself and life more objectively, to find signal within the noise, and deal with what’s real and what matters.
Neil offers a solid foundation drawn from more than 20 years of coaching, 10 years before that as a journalist, and decades of contemplative practice running through both. (Neil also has an academic master’s degree, out of which he won a research award and published a peer-reviewed paper on executive coaching methods.) His methodology integrates ontological coaching, neuroscience-backed mindfulness, and evidence-based psychology.
Three formats: solo deep dives, listener Q&A, and live coaching conversations.
New episodes Sunday mornings. Come skeptical. Stay curious.
What To Believe
The Enormous Cost of Looking Good
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We don't worry about what people think of us. We worry about what we think people think of us.
Episode 2 of What to Believe. I expose another mechanistic ego reaction — the need to look good in the eyes of others. It feels so natural we don't even register it as a thing, which is why it runs us. Same mechanism as the need to be right from Episode 1, different content.
I work through three reasons it matters: how wrong we are about what others think, how much it costs us in life and business (the Korean Air crash, the South African judge), and the drama it creates personally and politically. I share my own experience of losing a business in my forties and what it took to survive the shame of starting again at the bottom.
Then the practical work: the white coat and clipboard test, the blue ball exercise for tracking who you're giving your power to, and how to push the boundary and prove to yourself you'll survive.
Hosted by Neil Bierbaum — former investigative journalist, master coach (ICF MCC), MPhil Leadership Coaching (cum laude), faculty member at Stellenbosch Business School. New episodes Sunday mornings.
Come sceptical. Stay curious.
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