Ep. 009 | From Body Image to Midlife Empowerment: A Conversation with Linda Stephens

In this deeply informative episode of SOS – Stories of Survivors, host Serina Dansker sits down with Linda Stephens, M.S. Nutritionist, for an intimate and inspiring dialogue on the evolution of self-image and identity through midlife.

Linda shares her personal and professional journey of navigating body image, healing, and transformation—offering a raw, honest look at what it means to rediscover yourself during life’s pivotal transitions. With warmth and wisdom, she invites listeners to embrace every stage of life with grace, self-compassion, and a renewed sense of purpose.

This conversation is a powerful reminder that midlife is a reawakening. A must-watch for anyone seeking strength, clarity, and empowerment on their own path to wholeness.

Disclaimer:
The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guest and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the host, SOS Radio Live, or its affiliates. The content shared is for informational and inspirational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. We encourage all listeners to consult with licensed medical professionals regarding their personal health and wellness decisions.

To learn more about Serina Dansker, purchase her book S.O.S.: A Lesson on Love, Loss, & Survival, book her for a public speaking engagement, and discover more stories of hope, healing, and resilience, visit www.serinadansker.com.

S.O.S. Stories of Survivors — Where Survival Sparks the Soul.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:35

Hey there, and welcome to SOS Stories of Survivors. I'm your host, Serena Dansker, and today we are so fortunate to have a wonderful guest, Linda Stevens. She's going to teach us about learning to love ourselves at any age, in any type of body shape, in any type of mental state. She is just amazing. She's dedicated her life to helping others, especially women going through menopause. We discover their strength, their beauty, and their spark. Linda is a clinical nutritionist, personal trainer, and former professional athlete. But more than that, she's a voice. A voice for anyone, a voice for hope, and helping people get through their struggles looking in the mirror and finding a way to see the beauty in ourselves. In this episode, we're going to talk about how to dive into the emotional and physical changes that come throughout our lives and how to embrace it. And if you've ever felt lost inside of your own body, well, Linda is going to be here to give us the tools to move forward and to fall in love with ourselves all over again. Welcome, Linda. I'm so grateful you're here.

SPEAKER_03 1:48

Thanks, Serena. It's so good to be here. It's good to see you.

SPEAKER_00 1:51

You too, you too. I um I want to just get right into this and you know, maybe you can start by sharing a little bit about your own journey, your background, what's inspired you to dedicate your life to helping others through transitions and their bodies.

SPEAKER_03 2:08

Absolutely. So when I my first career and my first life, I like to say I worked, I worked in New York City, I worked on Wall Street, I was on a trading floor. I did that for quite some time when I graduated from college. And then I got married, I had children in my 30s and did the mom thing for a while. So I retired from that hectic life, but I did love working, working on a trading floor. Oh I know. Um it's it was so much fun. And back in the you know, mid to late 90s when things were great, and we just were in New York City restaurants and taking clients out to dinner and having a really good time. And but then I, you know, I wanted to slow it down a bit and raise some kids, which I did. I rate I have a son who's 23 who's graduating next weekend from school. Wow. I know. Congratulations! Thank you. One's out, and I still have my daughter who she'll be 21 in July, and she's graduating this time next year. So she has one more year in Hamilton.

SPEAKER_00 3:01

Oh boy, busy, busy.

SPEAKER_03 3:03

It is a busy time, it is a busy time. And it's interesting how, and you know this, they it's like it's just stages of how much they need you. Well, obviously, when they're smaller, you've got to do everything for them, but even when they get older, they still need you there, and they call you and ask you lots of questions and about life. And it's interesting because we never had that, right? Going to college, remember, there was a payphone on the first floor, and like I never called home, we never texted. There was no, you know, now they're you know, they're in constant contact, which is okay, but it's the you know, the difference is so so funny how they have access to us all the time, and we didn't have that growing up.

SPEAKER_00 3:39

No, we had a it was fend for yourself, sink or swim, you know, really.

SPEAKER_03 3:43

Exactly. Like you were sick, you just kind of stayed there until you got better. That's true. Wow. But you know, and and then but when I was when I was raising my kids, uh, a good friend of mine that is also from our area from southern Connecticut had said to me, you know, you like to work out so much, why don't you get your personal training certification and come and work for me? And she had some corporate gyms, and she's like, Teach some exercise classes for me and you know, see what you can do whenever you want to. And if people want you to train them, you know, build your own schedule. So I thought about it and I did it. So I went, I got the did the self-course in the National Academy of Sports and Medicine. I got my cert my personal training cert and I started teaching classes for her in Stanford, Connecticut, and then it just kind of grew. And then Serena, it was probably like 42, 43, right around the same time I started comp I started competing as um uh competitive bodybuilder. I I went back to school and got my master's degree in in clinical nutrition because I really wanted to know more about the body. I really wanted to understand like what happens when we eat food, then what happens? How do we build muscle? How do we lose fat? You know, I just I really wanted more knowledge on that, and I wanted to differentiate myself from just being a personal trainer.

SPEAKER_00 4:55

That's so you did this at 42. Yeah, I mean, that's so you just changed your whole way of thinking. And and that's hard to do at that age because you got the kids, the mindset, but I but I get it because it it's it's something you're passionate about, you know.

SPEAKER_03 5:08

Exactly. And I was lucky that I could do it, and so I did. It took me about almost three years because I had to take some prereqs, I had to take chemistry. I hadn't had chemistry since high school, and I was in my 40s, so high school was what, 16, 17. I mean, exactly, you know, and that was like general chem, and who even remembers any of that? So it was a challenge, it really was. I thought about quitting a few times because I'm like, this is a lot, and chemistry, organic chemistry, and balancing equations and just nutritional chemistry, and it was tough. But I, you know, after a lot of tears and deciding that I wasn't gonna quit, I hired a chemistry tutor, and that really helped me. That got me through the basics, and then I ended up just finishing the rest of the course load on myself without him, which was great. And I have my degree, and then I I really worked with people, I worked with other competitors. I kind of helped people, you know, I helped people lose weight when they wanted to and trained them, but then I really turned my business to midlife women probably right around like late 40s, early 50s, when I started going through my own journey of perimenopause because I was started having a lot of symptoms, and I'm like, what's going on here? And I have to say, no doctor of mine ever mentioned to me any of this stuff. I had no idea.

SPEAKER_00 6:30

I I I definitely I want to get to it, but I want before I want to find out, I know that you've had experience before we get to the midlife stuff. I want to go back just to your experience with the teenage bodies and dysmorphia and your children. And um because I know my children, both boys and girls, yes, had image issues growing up, being in high school, going back to that 16, 17 year olds, besides all the pressures of school, you have all the pressure to look good at yourself on, you know. So take me through that so we can go through like a timetable, if you will, you know, and then we'll and then we'll talk about that, the dysmorphia of the body um the menopause, because I want to really dive deep into that.

SPEAKER_03 7:12

Yeah, absolutely. So you want to talk a little bit more about my experience with with my children and body dysmorphia or each children and other children like you help my children too.

SPEAKER_00 7:21

I mean, I just and also the effects um about um your own effect, your own, you know, competing and competition. Maybe we'll talk a little bit about social media's impact on our bodies as well.

SPEAKER_03 7:35

Absolutely. And and you know, when when you and I grew up, because I think we're similar demographic, you might be a little younger than me. I'm 57, but same age.

SPEAKER_00 7:43

Okay, 57 in June.

SPEAKER_03 7:45

Okay, so you know, when we grew up, you know, we had magazines, right? Mademoiselle, Cosmopolitan, Vogue, you know, there was there were a lot of magazines back then. So yeah, it, you know, it was a thing back then, like body, you know, body image back then it was a thing because all the models on the covers of the magazines were super thin, and everything you looked at inside, everybody was super thin. So, you know, we had it, we had it in that respect.

SPEAKER_00 8:09

But I was the diet pills that were big back then.

SPEAKER_03 8:13

Yeah, what was it? Um, yeah, I can't think of some of the names of them, but I remember like there were a lot of like diet pills and like shakes and things that people would drink and just kind of weird diets and cabbage diets and all kinds of weird stuff that people were doing to lose weight.

SPEAKER_02 8:27

Yep, yep.

SPEAKER_03 8:28

And even wearing like the plastic suits and stuff, sweat more. And so, you know, we had we had that. Like, and when the magazines would come out, plus they were all over the grocery store, they were everywhere. So it was kind of hard to escape it then, but but you could. But I mean, now with phones, I mean you're faced with it every second of every day.

SPEAKER_00 8:48

Oh, for sure.

SPEAKER_03 8:49

You pick up your phone, and you know, there's a there's so much out there, and there's just so much information in general that comes at you all day long. It's like you know, it's it's what do they say? It's like drinking from a fire hose. It can be overwhelming. And you know, these kids, and you know, our kids are um my sons, our kids are 21. You're your group.

SPEAKER_00 9:08

Yeah, my kids will be 21 in July.

SPEAKER_03 9:10

Right, same with my daughter, because Lexi and Erica are are friends. That's how we know each other. But you know, they they see they see that all the time on social media and TikTok and Snapchat. And I think I really think once TikTok came into play, too, that that really, really affected kids a lot because they were all on it, and it was just being Photoshop, you know, they thought their bodies were real. I know, you know, it's just crazy, and they're just constantly fed that stuff, and they're looking at it all the time. And then, of course, when COVID hit and they were forced to be in, and everybody was attached to their phone. I mean, that's all that they saw where people working out, people looking thin, people scantily dressed and wearing all kinds of stuff, and you know, girls doing these programs, exercise programs, kind of crazy eating habits, cutting out carbs, not doing this. So, you know, it definitely is it's I always talk to people when I talk to women that have young kids, I tell them, like, here's a piece, one piece of advice I will give you as a parent of older kids. Yeah, keep them off social media as long as you possibly can. You know, and that's that is like the biggest thing. Keep them off the devices and the phone for as long as you can. And you know, you see little kids and stuff with iPads and phones, and it's like, I just, you know, it makes me it just makes me feel a certain way. And I'm not, it's not a judgment call, but no, I I would put my kids in front of like baby Einstein's or the same thing just to get a break for a moment.

SPEAKER_00 10:43

I understand where they're coming from, but it's it's it has such a negative effect on the kids, these iPads and it really does.

SPEAKER_03 10:51

And and to see them not like being outside and socializing with friends and doing those kind of things, you know, texting. Like I I've said to my children, why don't you call, you know, so and so? And they look at me like, why would I do that? I just call them, you might you could have a conversation in like a minute versus you text back and forth a hundred times. Like, I don't get that rationally.

SPEAKER_00 11:11

I I know. I sometimes people start texting, I'm like, I'm gonna just call you because I can't type that fast.

SPEAKER_03 11:18

Um I exactly. I'm even like that with my clients. I'm like, let's just jump on a call for five minutes so I can tell you what I need to tell you, or you can ask me, or and then I can you hear my, but you also hear the inflection in my voice context, so you don't take it out of context.

SPEAKER_00 11:31

Absolutely, I think that's so important, and just you know, just building relationship. And I mean, I it's it's really changed how we view our, you know, our ourselves, our mindsets, and and body image. I remember my boys even coming home, mom. I need muscles, you know, I need to impress the girls, you know. I need a six-pack, you know, they have these six-pack things like this mindset they had to do. It was crazy.

SPEAKER_03 11:58

Same, you know, even the girls too. I want abs. I want a bigger butt. I want abs. I want that.

SPEAKER_00 12:03

When I was growing up, you didn't want your butt big. So when my daughter would ask me, Mom, is my butt looking big? I'm like, oh no. And she's like, Oh, I know what what or no?

SPEAKER_03 12:12

You're like, wait, how do you want do you want it to look big or you don't want it to look big? Let's just first tell me what you want. But I know, I mean, you know, they're they're faced with it. And I think COVID really was very hard on all kids.

SPEAKER_02 12:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 12:26

Some kids harder than others, but it it definitely forced them to be more into the phone. And then I'm just concerned about what they were being fed from from different places and parts of the world and whatnot. And it shapes their thinking. It shapes their thinking. And in some cases, it was even turning kids against their parents, and it was, you know, it's just it's just it's a it's a gift and a curse. Social media is a gift and a curse. It's great because I use it for my business and it's it's awesome. It allows me to get my message out to people that I might not be able to reach, which is awesome. But I if I didn't need it for business, I probably wouldn't even use it at all because I didn't grow up with it, and it's not something I feel like I need in my life. But these kids, it's part of their upbringing, it's part of their lives. So they need to learn how to, I think, balance it and understand, you know, what's real and and and what could be, like you said, photoshopped or just right.

SPEAKER_00 13:21

And and are there any like tips maybe for fitness or nutrition or or to build to build confidence in these kids rather than feed into their unhealthy ideals, you know, that are being fed to them.

SPEAKER_03 13:34

You know, absolutely. I I'm a big advocate of of kids, you know, getting in the gym and and working with, you know, working in a in like a group setting. I know there's a lot of places that have like training sessions for kids, do that stuff. Like, you know, we lived in the same area. When my kids were little, I took them to Tumblebees at the YMCA, and we did all kinds of stuff where they could jump and run and and just be kids and bang into each other and you know, playground. I did a lot of playgrounds with my kids when they were little, but I would say, you know, get them into a gym setting, get them working out so that they know that feeling of having a strong body and us which makes you your mind strong and you release all those positive hormones that make you feel kind of invincible and good. Like when you walk out of the gym after a hard workout, you're like, Yeah, I got this, you know.

SPEAKER_02 14:22

So true.

SPEAKER_03 14:23

Yeah, and you and it's important for kids to have that feeling so that you know it'll help them if people are trying to bully them or push them around. And it it just also sets them up for good habits. So when they become adults, they're not constantly fighting, you know, trying to lose weight or trying to get in shape. Like going to the gym has just always been part of their routine, working in a gym, exercising, running, jumping, sprinting, lifting weights, whatever it is, right? It's they'll carry that through their lives.

SPEAKER_00 14:53

It's like a self-love kind of thing, too, because I know when my kids are going through exams and they're so stressed out and they have all this anxiety, they're dying because they need to get to the gym. They're like, I have no time to get to the gym, and just it's like a release. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_03 15:07

It totally is. It definitely brings cortisol down, brings your blood pressure down, you know, it makes you sleep better, you rest better. It's just, I mean, that the benefits are endless. And I when they understand that and they make the connection that when I when I exercise, even if it's just going outside and running, like Erica loves to run, it just really frees her mind. It's it's empowering for them because they're like, okay, I know if I'm stressed, I need to move my body, and then that helps me lower the stress and figure out a logical answer to a problem I may be having.

SPEAKER_00 15:40

It's it's true. And and then, you know, with that, once your body starts, you know, you're feeling good, you tend to want to follow that by having healthy habits for nutrition. Yeah, I think one leads to the other, and and it makes you hopefully make better decisions about what you're fueling your body with. Yeah, I remember they would come home and they would make these shakes, and I'd be like, ooh, that looks good.

SPEAKER_03 16:03

I know it is, it's it's exciting when you see your kids taking care of yours themselves. It's it's yeah, it's it's a night as a parent, it's like, okay, that's great. And it's and it's just something, like I said, they'll carry through their entire life. And that's what we want. We want them to be healthy, yes, sleeping well, like taking care of themselves, so that when they get to like the R ages, it's not like, oh my god, the wheels are falling off the wagon. I don't know, I why do I feel terrible? It's you know, they'll know how to manage and they'll be more aware of their bodies too, as far as okay, this doesn't feel right. Maybe I should talk to someone about this, you know, get something fixed, or you know, and just understanding, even girls, like this this is gonna be through the trajectory of your life. You're gonna have you know hormone fluctuations as you go through certain you know periods of time. So you they should understand this stuff, and the earlier the better, I think.

SPEAKER_00 16:54

Oh, absolutely. I mean, I am a big proponent of it. I know I know as teenagers, you know, when you're going through the mental stress and everything uh of school and and just friends and the sports and all of that, sometimes you just need time for yourself, too. And that exercise or that workout really helps you work through things. It's just uh it gives you the endorphins in a different, in a different capacity, if you will.

SPEAKER_03 17:21

Absolutely. I mean, I notice it with myself too. Something's on my mind and weighing on me, and and I feel kind of emotional about something. I can't, you can't make a good decision when you're feeling emotional about something. It doesn't, it just doesn't happen. But if you can step away, I always tell myself, all right, let's just step away for a little bit, let's change, let's do something else, distract your mind, you know, get in the gym, have a workout, do some work, and then revisit it. And then when you revisit, you're like, oh, okay, this is this is what I need to do. And it's such a different place to come at stuff from than being kind of going down a rabbit hole feeling dramatic or emotional.

SPEAKER_00 17:56

Well, yeah, those and those rabbit holes they go down. I mean, I saw some of Lexi's friends had bulimia and anorexia, and it was kind of scary, you know. I mean, it's uh it's crazy, you know.

SPEAKER_03 18:10

Um and I think I think also, too, when they see their friends getting like super thin like that, I think it affects them in a sense of, well, I feel like I'm too big or I feel like I need to lose, you know what I mean? And it they it just becomes this cascade of all of them kind of just well, she's super thin, so I should be super thin. And it, you know, you just see it all, you see it a lot more now. And it's probably because of social media. Like we didn't see it growing up. Sometimes you'd see someone with an eating disorder, sometimes. And then it was always like, whoa, you know, like everybody would stop and be like, whoa. Now it's it's you know, it's you see it more. You see it more.

SPEAKER_00 18:49

Yeah, and and that plays into mental health. I mean, you know, it's it's a big there's I think there's such a direct correlation between your diet, your physical activity, and your and your mental, you know, healthiness. All of it, you know, ropes together. And and that's probably like a good segue for us to segue into um you know, midlife menopause, reclaiming the power as as we get older, because habits that you form as a child or as a teenager, you know, when you're going through things as an adult, old habits die hard. If you know, if you ate your way through your problems, then you're probably eating your way through your problems now, you know. And uh I'd love to hear, you know, your thoughts on why so many women get caught off guard by menopause and and this whole thing.

SPEAKER_03 19:40

I you know, the reason that so many women get caught off guard with the hormonal changes that we go through, starting like in your late 30s, it starts in a like pre-menopause, it starts, it starts there. And when I look back at the the trajectory of my life, I noticed I'm like, oh, you know what, when all that stuff was happening, that's what it was, but no one ever said anything to me. And I think I think why we struggle so much, Serena, is because we had no one gave us any information.

SPEAKER_01 20:07

Right.

SPEAKER_03 20:07

I my OBGYN love her to death, but never talked to me about any of this stuff. Never, not after I had my kids with her, nothing. And my none of my doctors, internists, GPs, no one ever said anything about menopause or hormone fluctuations, or you might start to feel some of these symptoms. If you do, let me know, we can discuss it.

SPEAKER_00 20:28

Right.

SPEAKER_03 20:28

Nothing. I mean, and I really remember at 48 having a hard time, like kind of with mood and just my cycles coming sooner, and then PMS coming sooner, and just being like, okay, what it's I I only got one good week out of the month, kind of thing, right? Yes, two weeks of like PMS, and then a week of being having a cycle, and then one good week, and then you're right, you then you're rolling right back into it. You're like, why am I feel like I'm losing my mind all the time? So yeah, and that's I think the biggest reason is that we just don't have the education. Granted, it's a lot different now. A lot of doctors are talking about it. You've got, you know, doctors like Mary Claire Haver are talking about it, there's Sarah Gottfrey talking about it, Dr. Erica Schwartz talking about it. There are a lot, there's a lot podcasts, there's a lot more information now, but I think it's still confusing for a lot of women because the women that I work with and the women that I talk to all the time will always say to me, you know what, I I hear all this stuff and I I don't know, do hormones cause cancer? And I'm not really sure what I should be eating. I don't even know what supplement, you know, like people have a lot of information now, but they're still confused. So what I aim to do is say, okay, let's sit down, because I listen to all that information and I read and I research and I go to lectures and I I talk to a lot of doctors, and uh, you know, I tell them this is what we're gonna do. We're gonna sit down and put a plan together for you based on what you're going through, what your blood work looks like, what your DEXA scan looks like.

SPEAKER_00 21:55

And then everyone's different, right? Everybody is different.

SPEAKER_03 21:59

Exactly. And then let's put together, I'm gonna break it down for you, and I'm gonna then I'm gonna deliver it to you and go, okay, this is what we're gonna do. And then that's you know, that's the piece that I play. I I will disseminate all that information and then say, okay, here's your plan. Let's get started. And then as we go along the journey, you know, we'll change, modify, whatever we need to do. But it's women just need the structure. They need to know how much protein should I really be eating? Like how many times a day should I be eating? And and you know, lots of different questions. Should I cut out carbohydrates? No, don't cut out food groups, you know, what kind of vitamin vitamin D, definitely most of us, even men, are all deficient in vitamin D, so we need to make sure we're getting enough of that. That goes right to our bone health and immune health. So there's just so many different components, but I think it's confusing because there's it's like people just don't know. Like, what do I do? What do I eat? Yeah, yeah, yeah. How do I exercise? Should I think I'm lifting weights, but I'm not sure if it's heavy enough.

SPEAKER_00 22:57

So or how many reps to do, you know. That's that's you know, where it gets confusing. And you talk to your friends, oh, what did you do? Oh, well, I started doing cali collagen. And I'm like, what's that?

SPEAKER_03 23:08

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 23:10

How does that help? And you know, people, oh well, I you know, I'm doing Pilates, or I'm going to the gym and I'm lifting, or you're supposed to do cardio. And I honestly I hate cardio.

SPEAKER_03 23:21

I know, I know. It is it's a necessary evil, but I understand. But you're right, and it's you know, people will say, Well, I do Pilates, and I'm like, that's great, that's great for bone, um, that's great for joint mobility and stretching and and and flexibility, but you really have to get in the gym too and move some weight around too, because that's just really gonna stress your muscle and your bone and force it to stay strong. And for women, for us, I mean, guys get osteoporosis too, but not so much because they don't they have some estrogen, but they don't have that much estrogen. We have way more estrogen, and ours will eventually plummet. Uh, and then we've gotta, you know, we've got to do things to to to counteract that and to to work against it.

SPEAKER_00 24:04

Yeah, no, absolutely.

SPEAKER_03 24:06

Are there any myths about aging that you, you know, talk to women about or I think people people say sometimes, you know, I guess, I guess I'm just getting old, you know, and they're in their 50s, and I'm like, what? Like, what? You're only like 53, 4, even 57, even 60, you know, I'm like, it's you're as old as you feel, and you shouldn't, you know, you should, your body is an amazing machine. So if you if you fuel it, if you hydrate it, if you rest it, if you move it, yes, we're gonna get older and our face is gonna look a little different, our skin's gonna get a little bit different, but you should still be able to walk, bend down and pick something up, reach for something, you know, not fall down. But if you did stumble, you have, you know, you have the capacity to to correct yourself before you hit the deck and break a hip or a wrist or something, right?

SPEAKER_00 24:58

Right.

SPEAKER_03 24:58

But it takes, but you've got to do some work. You've got to, we have to do work.

SPEAKER_00 25:02

Yeah, the uh the balance and all of that is so important. And I mean, can you talk a little bit about hormones and how it you can optimize that for your confidence? I mean, even your libido, your energy, I mean, all of that stuff comes into play here as we age. You know, I hear a lot of my friends saying, I got no libido anymore, or I, you know, and it's kind of like crazy, and you know, and it also plays into your mental health because you still want to find yourself desirable and attractive and you know, and all of that.

SPEAKER_03 25:36

It's it's so true. And getting you know the 50s is kind of almost like the gateway. It's like all this stuff starts to happen to us in our 50s, and then it I feel like it can go one way or another. You can either be proactive and and take charge and do certain things, and I'll and I'll mention what I what they are, and I'll talk about what I've been doing from my own personal health journey. But take charge and try to counteract stuff and be proactive, or you can kind of just let stuff play out, and it's probably not going to be so good as the years come and go. It's just not.

SPEAKER_02 26:10

Right.

SPEAKER_03 26:11

And it's biological, we're all losing our hormones, so it's not like some people are just lucky and they get to keep theirs and other people don't, but you know, we're all we're all losing our hormones. And and I'm an advocate of doing a blood panel. Do a blood panel, find a doctor. If you can't find a doctor, talk to me. Lots of ways to get it done. Don't let your doctor tell you that it's not necessary or it's not important. I even had one client tell me her doctor said, Why would we do a hormone panel? That's stupid. And I'm like, Oh my god, like I'm like, Really? Why would he say that? Like, and she's like, no exaggeration. But do a blood panel so that you can at least, and yes, your blood, if you if you draw your blood every day, things will change every day, right? It's not gonna be, it's not a it's just a picture at that time and that moment, right? However, it's gonna, if your estrogen's low or tanked out, or your progesterone, your testosterone, if your thyroid's not working right, yeah, it's gonna tell you, you're gonna know. So it's not like you're gonna be fine one day and the next day you're gonna be in the tank. It's gonna be low, even if you test it every day.

SPEAKER_00 27:15

Right, right.

SPEAKER_03 27:16

Start with a panel, start with a blood panel and and talk to someone that knows how to read it and understand what's going on in your own biology. Okay, your estrogen is low, your your progesterone's low, which might explain why your sleep is now poor. Your sleep used to be good, but now you don't sleep great. You toss and turn, you wake up, you can't get back to sleep, um, your metabolism's low, you can't get that midsection belly fat off, or you're carrying it on your thighs and butt or your arms, wherever you carry your body fat, right? And you're feeling like, what is happening to me? And your um your testosterone is low, which testosterone affects your libido. When I ask them for that, how's your how's your libido? And they'd shake their head, they look up, yeah, thumbs down, and I know right away, I'm like, all right, you're probably your testosterone's probably low, and or or in the tank. And understanding what these numbers tell you is gonna tell you how to proceed. And yes, there are supplements, there are natural ways to help yourself feel better. Definitely like adjusting your lifestyle. That's where I'm like, okay, how do you eat every day? Let's look at that. Okay, look, you're only getting like 50 grams of protein a day. We need to bump that up. You need to make sure you're eating more throughout the day. So you have energy. You're giving your mitochondria, your cells, the energy to do all the things your body wants to do every day. Just beating your heart, pumping your blood, and blinking your eyes and breathing, that all takes calories. People don't think about that, right?

SPEAKER_00 28:42

No, and they're so afraid to eat because they think they're gonna get fat. But but it's actually the opposite. The more you eat, right? The more you're actually doing good for your body. Your body's able to exactly.

SPEAKER_03 28:53

And the more you eat, if you're trying to lose weight, you have to eat to lose weight because your body is smart. If you're only gonna feed it once a day, your metabolism is gonna, okay, let's just drop way down here. And then when you do go out to dinner and you have, you know, a cocktail and a burger and fries, and you get up in the morning, you're like, oh my god, my weight's up five pounds. Why is that? Because your body just holds on. It's like, well, we don't know when you're gonna feed us again, so we're gonna we're gonna pack it on, we're gonna hold it. And you're like, I I eat once a day, I can't get this weight off. And it's like, well, yeah, you're not eating enough. Your body is in conservation mode, so we need to turn that off. But in a midlife woman, that's also too where I say, let's look at your thyroid, like let's see what's going on with your thyroid hormones. And there's there are a few thyroid hormones that you should look at, not just thyroid stimulating hormone, which is the only thyroid hormone they'll pull on a on a metabolic blood panel. If you just go in fasted and do glucose and red cells, white cells, liver enzymes, all that, they'll just look at thyroid stimulating hormone. They won't go down to free T3 and free T4, which is what you want to look at because that's gonna tell you how how healthy your metabolism is. You want to look at those two.

SPEAKER_00 30:01

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_03 30:02

And then, you know, with estrogen slowing down, we tend to store more body fat and it affects our bones. We're losing muscle tissue, our cognitive health suffers, our heart suffers. Yep. The number one killer of midlife women, postmenopausal women, is heart disease, not breast cancer. And everyone, everyone seems to think it's breast cancer, but it's heart disease. It's because as we make less and less and less estrogen, our hearts are covered in estrogen receptors, and the estrogen keeps our heart healthy and strong. And when estrogen starts to get lower, now those cells aren't getting what they need, and then that's when we become more susceptible to heart disease. Higher cholesterol, a lot of women in midlife will say, I never had high cholesterol, now my cholesterol's up. I never had high blood pressure, now my blood pressure's up. That's because estrogen is is on the descent, and it that's why it's important to understand to see these numbers, and then you know, change your lifestyle. Make sure you're eating the right types of foods, make sure you're exercising, strength training to hit the bones and the muscles. And then you've got to use some certain supplements in in midlife. I love to use with women that help. And then it may be at that point, once we fixed all those things, and maybe like, okay, you know what? Now you really probably should talk to a doctor, a hormone doctor, not an endocrinologist, probably not your OBGYN, probably not your general practitioner, a doctor that really that does hormone replacement every single day with women that really understands it and knows how to dose you, and then bring you up slowly until you get to optimum optimization or where you are feeling like your old self again, for lack of a better term.

SPEAKER_00 31:42

Yeah, no, but that's what you want. You want to be you, yeah?

SPEAKER_03 31:46

And that and then you get all those benefits the cardio protection, the cardiovascular protection, the cognitive health, and the bone health, which the hot flashes in the mood sweat, the hot flashes in the night sweats may eventually go away on their own, maybe not, but usually they will, but we don't know what's going on with inside our brains, our bones, and our heart because you can't see that every day.

SPEAKER_00 32:08

So no, but they they do get more. I know, you know, my mom would, you know, her bones were more brittle, you know, for lack of I don't know, calcium or estrogen.

SPEAKER_03 32:18

Estrogen. Yeah, estrogen. I mean, they all play a role in bone strength, but I mean estrogen is is is the big one because it's it's the hormone that we have, it's our big hormone, but we do have testosterone, and testosterone definitely plays a role in bone health and cardiovascular health and brain health, and it helps with it helps counteract that fat loss and and your libido. Start using a little testosterone, your libido will definitely turn around.

SPEAKER_00 32:44

So that's that's so good. Now, at what age would you say you would you know start a program? I mean, would you start from from a youth? You know, would you start getting a on the vitamins or like uh what do you recommend for people?

SPEAKER_03 32:55

You know, I would say, you know, I would say this for girls, as early as you can, you know, start them, if even if they're little kids, like feed them well, you know, there's the the food supply, although I hope things are starting to get a little bit better with getting some of the food dyes out and the petroleum-based stuff that I've been reading about. But you know, feed your teach your kids good good eating habits at home while they're young. That is the key. And you know, I did that with my kids. They ate vegetables, they ate people would say, How do you get your kids to eat broccoli? I'm like, I don't know. I just feed them, I just fed them. And if they didn't want to eat, I'm like, all right, then go to bed.

unknown 33:33

Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_03 33:34

It's not a restaurant, I'm not making you something different.

SPEAKER_00 33:37

I had friends sneak it into the brownies and the chicken.

SPEAKER_03 33:41

Yeah, I you know what I would do. I gave them a choice. Do you want green beans or broccoli? Oh, I want broccoli. Okay, cool. You like they felt like they had an opinion, even though they really didn't, but but you know, feed them, get them eating all foods. And and it's okay for them to have treats. They should, you know, kids can have should have ice cream and have treats, but you just gotta read ingredients. Like I did a lot of shopping at Trader Joe's and I'd bring them with me and I'd let them pick their snacks because I feel like some of their snack stuff was a little bit better. Yeah, you know, so I would let them pick things, but I never let them eat like fruit roll-ups or stuff with lots of food coloring and dyes in it. I just never did it because my dad was a chemist growing up, so I had I had a little bit of an idea about you know stuff, but before I studied nutrition, I mean I just I didn't really know that I didn't know that much, but I had no clue. I it just but you know, I say now, like in when parents take care of themselves, kids see that, as you know, and they and they they mimic what we do. So they see you working out at home or they see you going to the gym or they see you going for a run. Like your kids are gonna be like, I want to do that stuff. Like they pick up our habits, so pick show them good habits, so they'll pick those up.

SPEAKER_00 34:52

That's really good.

SPEAKER_03 34:53

And then I think you know, we have daughters in our 20s, and I want I actually want Erica to do a hormone panel because I just want to kind of I want to see where she's at in her 20s. And then maybe she does another one again sometime in her 30. But you you always have that that kind of that baseline. So someday when she's in her 50s, she could be like, Oh, look, here's this is where I I was here in my 20s, and now I'm here in my 50s, and you can see the difference.

SPEAKER_00 35:17

But I think that's brilliant, actually, because you you do that, you know, I even sever 10 years, like a colonoscopy, you know, yeah, you know, every five or ten years, or or whatever your your health, you know, your nutrition and your your uh fitness is is part of that.

SPEAKER_03 35:33

Absolutely. And I think always having a baseline, and doctors will probably look at you if you're crazy, but you can you can get labs drawn different, you don't need to go through the doctor, you can get it done lots of different ways now. But I think that's important is you know, have have that baseline. And then then what you can do is as you get older and you start to see your hormones maybe starting to come down a little bit, maybe at that point you start a little, you know, you start a little therapy earlier on so that you can sort of keep yourself level. And you know, it's but it's that you can have that dialogue with your healthcare practitioner so that you know so you don't have to suffer. You know, it's it's it's hard. It's my symptoms were I had a lot of joint stiffness, body aches, body pains, lower back pain, shoulder pain. My sleep went was garbage, and I was always a good sleeper, and just fatigue, that just constant tired. So I never didn't, I never had night sweats or hot flashes um and anxiety. I developed panic attacks.

SPEAKER_00 36:32

Oh God, and but nobody talked about this stuff. Like it was taboo, you know. You there was no conversations about what was going on. I mean, my menstrual cycle went berserk. I mean, it was crazy. Um, you know, to the point where I thought I was hemorrhaging at some point. That I was just like, is this normal or is there something really wrong with me? You know, and eventually figured it out. I was starting menopause.

SPEAKER_03 36:55

Yeah, I know menopausal path, you know. Absolutely. And just, you know, a little bit of hormones can make a big difference. And the other, the there's a bunch of myths out there too. And I always recommend everyone read this book. It's called Estrogen Matters, and it's written by Dr. Blooming, I believe, B-L-U-M-I-N-G. Uh uh, estrogen matters by Dr. Blooming, and it's a great book, and it just goes through why estrogen is so important for us. It debunks all the myths that using bioidentical estrogen causes cancer or breast cancer. It does not, and the studies are out there. If you pick up the book, he lists every single study that shows it does not cause cancer. And so it's it's a great book, and it'll really give a woman a really good idea of what the mainstream medical tells us versus what's really true, because doctors are still telling people taking hormone replacement therapy will cause cancer. And it it doesn't, it's that's old news. It's right, it's a myth, it's been debunked time and time again, but you still hear doctors spout it and it's frustrating because they're not doing their patients any any service by that. And like if your knee's bothering you, they're gonna your doctor's gonna send you to an orthopedist, right? So if your hormones are bothering you, why don't they say go to this hormone doctor and get yourself checked out? And again, it's not gonna be your endocrinologist. I'm not throwing shade on doctors, I am not a doctor, they are way smarter than I am. However, it's not gonna be an endocrinologist, it's just not gonna happen.

SPEAKER_00 38:26

Well, that's the thing. I mean, I remember, you know, fighting with my husband, I was like, it's so hot in here, and he'd be freezing under the covers, you know. And then and then all of a sudden, you know, I'd be cold and I'd steal the covers from him.

SPEAKER_03 38:39

I know, it's a and it's a real thing. It is. It's like, oh my god, is it hot in here? I'm like, I dress in layers now. I walk around in the winter like this. And they're like, Are you cold? I'm like, nope, I've got an internal heater, I'm good.

SPEAKER_00 38:51

He'd be like, no, no, honey, it's you.

SPEAKER_03 38:54

Like, okay. I know, but it, you know, as women, we have to self-advocate. And any any woman listening to this, if your doctor tells you it's not necessary, it's stupid, it's too late, you pat you the windows passed for you to use hormone, it's garbage. Don't listen to it. Find somebody that's that's willing to have the conversation so that you can ask questions. You should never feel badly by be made to feel badly by your doctor about asking.

SPEAKER_00 39:22

No, you have to advocate for yourself. Yeah. Because they don't, they they're not God, they don't know everything. Right. And they make mistakes too, a lot, you know. You know, they it's it's crazy, but I agree with you. You know, it's always good to get somebody who specializes in these things.

SPEAKER_03 39:39

Absolutely, absolutely. I've been on my own hormone replacement therapy. It's probably about two years now. I think it'll be two years in August or September, but it's really, I have to say, it's been a it's been a game changer. It really has. And all the the aches and pains went away and the anxiety went away, and I sleep better, and I my libido's great, and I feel like myself, I'm strong in the gym, and you know, it's not to say that little sometimes I get a tweak here and there, whatever, but you know, but for the most part, it's it's it's so much better. It's it's so much better.

SPEAKER_00 40:12

That's so awesome. Yeah, that's that's definitely something I'll have to talk to you about.

SPEAKER_03 40:16

And yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 40:18

You know, and and get your contact info because I'm definitely always interested in that, and especially as you get older, just learning, you know, getting the panel done. I haven't done a panel, you know. I've been going through my doctor's recommendations, or you know, I uh I had a holistic doctor, you know, that I would talk to about, you know, estrogen replacement, but not actually doing the hormones, you know. Um, and it's it's helped, you know, absolutely. But I'm always open to, you know, to bettering myself and learning more. Um, if you could send a message to your younger self and also your future self, the 80-year-old Linda, what would it be?

SPEAKER_03 40:56

I would say if I could send a message to my to my past self, knowing what I know now, I would have been much more vigilant about finding out what was going on. And and you know, no one really talked about hormone replacement therapy, but it was around. It was around. It was around when our when our moms were growing. My mom was on premrin. I remember her being on premrin and prempro, and then that's when they yanked everybody off because they said it caused cancer, and right all those, that's where that comes from, that women's health initiative. And then they yanked everybody off the hormones, and then they did nothing. Like they just I remember watching my mom just like she has, you know, she's got bad osteoarthritis, but she was having hot sweat, uh, night sweats and hot flashes. But I would say, you know, be more proactive, be do a you know, I would have done a blood panel, I would have uh learned to understand my own biology more, so for sure. And my 80-year-old self, I would I wanna I would say keep moving, I want to keep lifting weights, and I want to still be in the gym when I'm 80, 85, 90, 100.

SPEAKER_00 41:55

So beautiful. I really do. I think that's awesome. Uh well, let's lighten it up a little bit and let's do some uh fun questions. So um a morning workout or an evening workout, what's your favorite?

SPEAKER_03 42:10

I prefer like later morning. I when I lift, it's usually like 10, like 10 o'clock. 10 o'clock is nice. I don't, I've never been one to get up super. I'll get up early and do cardio, like walk or get on my elliptical. I do that a lot. If anybody follows me on social media, they'll know I'm always on there in the morning giving some information. But I lifting weights, I like to just get up and get moving, get the ju the blood flowing before I start moving weight, just because my body responds better that way.

SPEAKER_00 42:41

That's so cool.

SPEAKER_03 42:42

Um as long as you do it, whatever works for you, just do it. Whatever it is, get it done.

SPEAKER_00 42:49

Um, your favorite self-care ritual that instantly boosts your mood. What do you do that's a boost your mood when you're feeling down?

SPEAKER_03 42:56

I love to get a really good pedicure. And I always I have them do like the extra foot rub, like I do like you know, 15 minutes, 20 minutes on each foot. I I I'm all cold, I fall asleep. Nothing like a good foot massage, foot rub. That is that's I would have to say that's one of my favorite things. I don't do that.

SPEAKER_00 43:17

I love that too. Um, one thing you wish every teenage girl knew about her body.

SPEAKER_03 43:26

That her body is an incredible machine that needs to be well taken care of through uh nourishing it with food and self positive talk, self love.

SPEAKER_00 43:47

Um, okay, this is a fun one. Your favorite empowering song that you blast when you need a lift. What do you what's your favorite song?

SPEAKER_03 43:55

Eric is gonna laugh. If Erica, my daughter, if she watches this, I every That one song, um uh I'm invincible, I'm a like a Porsche with no breaks. That one, yeah, yeah, yeah. But every time that would come on, like, and I've used it a lot in some of my social media posts, it's like, Mom, every time I hear that song, I think of you. But it is, it's a good song. It's like, yeah, I'm strong, I can get through anything, I I can do this.

SPEAKER_00 44:20

That's it, yeah. I listen to that. What is that? The plant's Rachel Planton, you know. The I listened to that one, the the fight song, you know. Yeah, that yeah, that's a good one. I like that one too.

SPEAKER_03 44:29

There are some good ones out there. Of course, you know what? I don't know titles, I just listen to stuff. I don't know the name of the title.

SPEAKER_00 44:36

It's like I but I could sing you every word in the song. So true. That's so funny. I don't know, that's really funny. Um, okay, coffee, tea, or green juice. What's your go-to?

SPEAKER_03 44:49

Oh, you know, I do love a good strong cup of black coffee, like a good dark roast. Yeah, it is. I enjoy that in the afternoon. I'll have I'll usually have some coffee around one o'clock, and I you know what? I I sit quiet when I have it, like the phone's on mute. Either if it's nice, I sit outside or or sit on a comfy in a comfy chair and I just enjoy that coffee. It just I don't know, it's it's relaxing. I know that sounds funny because it has caffeine in it, but I find it very relaxing.

SPEAKER_00 45:16

That sounds it sounds actually really enjoyable.

SPEAKER_03 45:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 45:20

Oh, that's so funny. Um, what's the best compliment you've ever received?

SPEAKER_03 45:26

I I would say when people tell me I look younger than I than I am, that's that's a big compliment. You know why? Because I work hard at taking care of myself, and I feel like that's just a testament of what I'm doing is working.

SPEAKER_00 45:41

Yeah, yeah. That's that's so true. And and one thing you hope women remember about themselves, even on their hardest days, because we all have them, you know.

SPEAKER_03 45:51

Yeah, absolutely. I would, you know, even on the hardest days, personally, what I do is I always I tell myself, I I got this. You know, I I I look back and I'm like, I've been through worse, I've survived these things, I'm still standing, and I'll survive this too. So it's just a matter of, you know, I'm I I've made it to 57, I've raised two kids, like I've been through a lot, and I can handle whatever else is coming.

SPEAKER_00 46:17

Oh, that's true. You gotta have hope, you know. You know, and no, you sometimes you gotta get through the storm to see the rainbow on the other side.

SPEAKER_03 46:25

Yeah, what do they say? It's darkest before dawn.

SPEAKER_00 46:27

Yes, yes, it's true. So true. Well, I I wanna definitely um ask you, you know, George, you know, for every woman listening, whether they're 16 or 60, um, what's a message you want them to take away from today, you know, that they can carry with them?

SPEAKER_03 46:48

I want them to uh you know cherish their cherish their bodies and do that through respecting yourself, respecting yourself enough. Yeah, it's you know, you want your hair to look nice and dress nice and have nice things, but take care of your body, respect your body and nourish it and and take take good care of it and and be proactive about it too, because your body may tell you things and don't ignore it. You know, if your body's telling you something, if it's telling you it's hungry, you should eat. If it's telling you you're tired, rest it. If it's something's bothering you, get it checked out. Like listen to your body when it tells you things and but treat it like it is. It's a it's an um it's a precision machine. And I always say, I know this is a car term, but if you have a Lamborghini or a Ferrari or you're not gonna pull into the gas station and dump 87 octane in it. So why would you take why would you treat your body like that? Your body is a precision machine, just like an expensive sports car, or even an expensive handbag, you would take care of it. Whatever you do, you know, you're not gonna take it to a football game or uh, you know, I mean just be proactive.

SPEAKER_00 48:04

What a great analogy, right?

SPEAKER_03 48:05

Like awesome. It's so true. Like, just think about before you ingest something or do something, like, is this gonna harm me or heal me? That's how I always like to look at it.

SPEAKER_00 48:14

I love that. I really do. I think that's so amazing. And and if people want to connect with you, Linda, you know, and learn about midlife mastery and follow your work, how how do they get in touch with you?

SPEAKER_03 48:26

They can go right to my website because when they and I'll give you the my my address, when they my website comes up, there's a little box that'll pop up, and I always offer a 30-minute complimentary conversation. And there's never any obligation. I'm happy to talk to people. If they want to work with me, that's awesome. But if they don't, that's okay too. But it's my website is Lynda M Stevens with a PH. So it's linda m s t-e-p-h-en-s.com.

SPEAKER_00 48:53

Wow, that's my Instagram.

SPEAKER_03 48:55

My Instagram too is lynda stevensfit f I t.

SPEAKER_00 48:58

I'm gonna definitely take you up on that 30 minutes. I'm gonna join it. Every one of my listeners should do it too.

SPEAKER_03 49:04

Absolutely. It's you know, I can always I can always offer, I can give them a lot of information and I can give them some things that they can do preliminary if they're having hormone stuff going on. Like, here, try do some of this stuff, it will help.

SPEAKER_00 49:16

Um, at least so I I think that's so awesome. And um, usually I I close out each show with a poem from my son Scott. Um, and I think this one really resonates because uh Mother's Day is coming up, and it's it's called Mom. And uh he wrote, Most people, if not all, love their mothers, fathers, sisters, and brothers. But a mother is the one who holds everyone so tight, stops all the fights, and cooks dinner every night. Now, look, nobody is perfect, and everybody deserves love and appreciation, no abbreviations. Love is something not everyone possesses, most people repress it, but I can say for sure, my mom gives more love than anyone perceives. She does so much for everyone, you wouldn't even believe. People mostly look past her, but even the dog knows she's the master. Mom, I love you, and I want you to know I will always turn your seat heater on because I'm that much of a bastard. Talking about hot flashes, he would do that, and I'd be like, oh, and I'd look down, I'd smack him in the yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:27

Why am I on fire?

SPEAKER_00 50:31

That's I thought that was kind of a property. That's a great poem.

SPEAKER_03 50:33

That's beautiful, it really is.

SPEAKER_00 50:36

Well, I do want to say thank you, Linda. And I think your tips and tools are gonna be really helpful to all of our listeners, and they should really take you up on your offer to go to your website at lindastevens.com. Linda M. I have to do it. Linda M. Stevens don't forget the M from Mastery. Meet Light Mastery. That's right. Linda M Stevens. And um also um SOSradio.live, you can go on to SOS Stories of Survivors and you can rate me, you can donate, you can like the story, you can subscribe. And um remember SOS Stories of Survivors, where survival sparks the soul. Thank you so much for joining us today, and I'll see you next week.

SPEAKER_03 51:25

Thanks, Serena.