The Losing Ticket
Some of the stories & observations that have been witnessed over my 50+ years. Join me as I retell some of the funny and not so funny experiences that my friends and I have been a part of. Topics will change as I try to find my voice and see if this can grow into something. Come along for the ride!
The Losing Ticket
The Losing Ticket Wrap up Show #2
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Joined today by Ritchie and Mike as we talk about Wrestlemania and Parties Part 1 episodes. Join us for more laughs and in depth perspectives.
All right, all right, all right. Hello, everybody. Uh again, this is Matt, and welcome to The Losing Ticket. Uh, this episode uh we're gonna do uh what we had back in earlier month, this uh wrap-up show. So this will be our second wrap-up show uh following the WrestleMania and Narnia and the parties podcast that we've had uh on the 9th and 16th of the month. And we have again two special, very special guests. Um one Richard and one Michael. Okay, so so these these two guys have been participants definitely with the WrestleMania and Arnia. They were right there with me. And uh they've been to many uh parties. And they've been to plenty of parties, so they're gonna have their own perspectives and stories to uh share with everybody. So I guess we can uh do you want to uh do it in order? We want to do WrestleMania?
SPEAKER_04Sure, sure.
SPEAKER_01Alright, so uh maybe maybe we start with the beginning. How how did that start?
SPEAKER_03Well, it started right here in this chair, right in the studio. Uh if you guys remember out there in uh podcast land, all 15 of you. Uh we started uh we didn't like 20 now. I know we did uh the original uh wrap-up show, the morning of the WrestleMania Narnia, and then um we uh the uh the insanity started pretty much right after uh before we picked up Mike. Um we were in the car and uh you know when you were a k when you were like a teenager in your twenties and you talk about women, you go, yeah, she's pretty hot, but man, she's high maintenance. Well, let me tell you something. We have a high maintenance friend and his name is Mitch Stoolman. Excuse me, whatever the host podcast host is going by these days. Um but yeah, so his blood sugar was uh a problem. Um he uh he may have taken some uh edibles. I mean I did.
SPEAKER_01I took I took three edibles.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I wanted four, but I but Rich said no.
SPEAKER_03Well, well let's get it that's where Mike came in too.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. But but because of the because of that sugar attack, I didn't I didn't eat anything that morning. Like I didn't have breakfast. So I had a sugar attack, and we had Pop Tarts. So I brought a Pop Tart or two, you know, they come in two. So I had a Pop Tart. I believe there might have been some dots, those little jelly dots.
SPEAKER_03I guess dipping dots or some shit.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, dots in the truck, and then I was drinking water. Okay. And so from what I understand, as I was leaving, I started my my beeper on my phone.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, it was pretty quick. So Greg, I think, drove the whole way. Greg did drive your truck, yeah. And then so this is the kind of person Matt is. First of all, he blames uh Greg for a uh a flat tire.
SPEAKER_01I didn't get it, Greg did.
SPEAKER_03So apparently the day in the that's just called karma, you know, the tire the next day. Matt was uh I'm sorry, Greg was nice enough to drive his vehicle, which is not an easy vehicle to drive, it's a large, uh, it's it's uh what we call here in America a small penis vehicle.
SPEAKER_02Um, there's truth to that.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. But uh yeah, right.
SPEAKER_00I think Greg needed a booster seat too. Oh, yeah, he wasn't used to it, right? No, he is a truck driver. He's not like a truck driver.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, he drives a Mac truck, Greg does. He's a big boy. Um, but yeah, so when we picked up Mike, um I would say what, in another ten minutes, all of a sudden it hit you like a ton of bricks.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, we were like in Grand Island, maybe maybe even right there and hit it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, you're like, oh, I think it's coming on.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, we were on a row where there was like fields on either side, it felt like we were kind of starting to get into the like the sticks a little bit.
SPEAKER_01That's why I called it Narnia, because it was like you're in the middle of nowhere.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, okay. And um man, it hit you so quick. And uh I just uh and then when we got there, you turned around and looked at us and went, should I take another one? And Mike and I are like, no, no, you're not taking another one. Are you kidding me?
SPEAKER_01And then I wonder how bad that would have been.
SPEAKER_00Oh I think the outcome probably would have been not the same. Yeah, I think I think once you smelt that pizza right at the beginning, it probably wasn't.
SPEAKER_01It was the cat- it was a catalyst.
SPEAKER_00It probably would have came sooner.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. But like I knew you guys were looking at me, and I don't want to get too ahead of the story. No, but when you guys were looking at me when we were seated, yeah, I could feel like my whole body going down a vortex. It was almost like there was a whirlpool in front of me, and I was going down, so like my whole body was just like, and I remember closing my eyes and it felt good. Yeah. Because I'm like, oh, and and uh just yeah, I was definitely gone. I was I was fucking now, I don't even know where the fuck I was.
SPEAKER_03Here's a question for you, and I know this is probably we could blame edibles for this, but put it in your notes if you're listening, if you want to make a comment. So when you start to I'm I'm assuming everybody that is listening right now listened to the original episode that aired previously.
SPEAKER_01You know, we're talking about Matt throwing up June June uh ninth, folks, June 9th.
SPEAKER_03We're talking about a man in his fifth dedicated of life who threw up on himself in public. Uh so just it just so everybody knows what we're talking about, if you have not listened pup uh previously, but so when you're at the point where you're feeling it, I couldn't move my feet. So, but you weren't like you didn't have any like instinct to go, Greg, I'm not feeling I think I may have a problem here. Or like, you know, just so we can maybe get you up.
SPEAKER_01If I did, I said it in my mind. Oh, okay. Because I remember thinking to myself, I'm gonna puke, but I can't get up. So I was like, well, it's just I'll just make sure I hold it. Like I was gonna hold it in my mouth. Oh, and the first the first shot did did I did stop the first like thrust. Which only works in the movies, by the way. Doesn't work in real life. The second one was there's no stopping me now with the second one.
SPEAKER_03It was so gross. Oh, I remember sitting there, and I think you tapped me, and and he you kind of did the the thumb over, and I'm like, oh shit.
SPEAKER_00It was just flowing on his fingers. Yeah, it was like the side of his face, it was just so gross. He's just sitting there staring forward. Oh my god.
SPEAKER_01Like how I I remember two times I puked. Did I puke more than twice? I mean, what do we talk?
SPEAKER_00I think it was like when it was coming up, it was like like somebody turned on the spigot, like the spicker system. It was just flowing for like a uh like what seemed like forever. It just kept flowing. And you what did you say?
SPEAKER_03There was people next to me. Well, first off, we measured it in pounds, we didn't measure it in the amount of times you puked. We measured it in cups, actually. Because like I we had, by the way, delicious pop at this uh uh establishment we were at this fire hall. They had really good pop.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03So I had two cups, and I think I handed them to you, Mike, because you were you were two over, right? So it was Greg directly Greg was like ground zero.
SPEAKER_00Greg was touching.
SPEAKER_03Poor Greg. And you guys remember Greg from the original, he he's uh Harry Shipman, Greg. So just so you guys know from the original uh wrap-up show, but um yeah, so poor Greg. He's sitting what? Like this close to Matt's arm because they're so the seats were so close together. Yeah, they were they were obnoxiously.
SPEAKER_00These seats were side by side, and they were like school chairs. Uh touching. Like we're all hugging each other sitting here and watching this event. Yeah. You couldn't breathe with someone else.
SPEAKER_03It was awful. And so of all fucking times for your podcast hero and mine to decide to throw up, he does it where I mean you were like Mike just said, you're touching each other. And just to answer your question, Matt, yeah, there's these two girls next to us. One couldn't have been more than twelve. One couldn't have been was probably a teenager, a little older. I mean, you the looks on their fa I can't even tell you. It looked like they were watching their families getting murdered by like clowns or something. Like it was like they were horrified, like just awful. This I and I and it's like, what do you do? Because they're probably thinking it's gonna get on me, and it's and it smelled horrible, you know? Oh, it did. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00I just couldn't stop laughing. I know. We were kind of like four. Every time I looked at over the back, I just started laughing. Yep. I just couldn't help it.
SPEAKER_03And it was funny too, you say that, because uh uh when we There's black chicks behind us too, right? Yeah, they left. They they left. They're like, fuck this. They drove out to the sticks for that, and they're like, this is why we don't come out to the country. Because this is this is the show. I think they're like wait, white people fatigue. I don't blame them. That's hilarious.
SPEAKER_00We're going back to the city.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, we're going back where people don't do this shit. We will watch a wrestling on TV like a normal like normal people, you know. Oh my god. But um, yeah, it was one of those things where Matt, he um when we were out front before the show started, because it's not the most organized situation they have there. You're kind of just waiting out front till they say go in. And and Matt already highs a kite going, I'm not gonna be able to keep my mouth shut around these people. I'm gonna make comments towards them. Very high horsey judgmental.
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah, very much so. And um They were definitely beneath me at that point in life.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, but then it became where like like Mike just said, like, we couldn't look at Matt without laughing. Like all of a sudden, Matt became the fodder. Like, you think we were like, because you know they oh they're he's he's these are his good friends, they're there to help him. No, we were laughing at him like the whole time.
SPEAKER_01When we when we first parked, before we even got in there, I remember we I think you guys helped me walk.
SPEAKER_00Yes. Uh up the ramp.
SPEAKER_01And I had my I had my cane with me, and we and it was up the ramp. And I remember thinking that we were like going up a mountain, and it was probably only about like five degrees, you know, the the sidewalk.
SPEAKER_00Very minimal pitch.
SPEAKER_01And then we had to wait for to for that fucking security guard to come out, Mr. Cool Guy, and yeah, you're good, you're good, you're good, you're just gonna be.
SPEAKER_03He's a very nice gentleman.
SPEAKER_01Probably was. But like I'm sitting there waiting, and I'm like, oh my god, I'm gonna fall off this mountain. I thought I was gonna I thought I needed a rope. That's how freaking steep it was to me.
SPEAKER_03And then when we got in, you you got mad at Greg and I because we had the audacity to go and get a couple drinks. He's like, where'd they go? Where'd they where did they ditched me? They ditched- I could see you yelling. And then he was complaining too. See, by the way, just so you guys know, I know you think you live on planet Earth, but you actually are living in Matt's world. So he was complaining. So I'm sure you guys know how wrestling is, they have an aisle way where the wrestlers come out where you can't go past you can't go through because it's it's an it's a gated off aisle where they walk to the the the ring. He was complaining that he didn't get a direct walk to his seat, that he had to walk around that. Because that's, you know, because wrestling, you know, like that that's the you had to walk an extra what fifty feet? Then there was a handicapped guy that wouldn't like move. Yeah, he had some like problems, he couldn't, yeah. I'm like, what the fuck, man? I got a cane, and you're gonna make me go around you? And then there was a gentleman there, he was a very nice guy, but he's like, is he alright? Like, he's screaming louder than the wrestlers in the ring, like, dude, we're not trying to get people to look at this guy. We're embarrassed enough, you know? I was probably guys didn't ask for a big blanket to put over me. We asked for towels? We asked for dude, we you have no idea. Like, it was it was like a mixture of laughter and panic. It really was. It oh my god. And um so much happened in a small period of time, and it's like, okay, well, we decided, and I think Mike you called it. You're like, I think we're gonna leave now. And then you wanted to wait till halftime, so you know, not to not to attract too much attention. Which I think I did, too. Yeah, oh my god.
SPEAKER_01Oh I had like I know I had Pop-Tart pieces up and down my shirt. And then it was like really more water. I think little nibblets of of of dots. Because it smelled afterwards, I thought the puke smelled fruity.
SPEAKER_00Oh my gosh. I don't know what it smelled like, but it was just gross. Seeing the chunks all over your shirt.
SPEAKER_01It was Pop Tart, it wasn't like spaghetti or anything.
SPEAKER_00It's still food you chew and swallow like a baby bird.
SPEAKER_01Well, not really, because those are big ass chunks.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01How did it get in there?
SPEAKER_00And then maybe you should chew a little bit better. Yeah, that might be your problem.
SPEAKER_03Chew your food, yeah. So he blames Greg, my beloved cousin. Greg, I hope you're doing well today. I love you, buddy.
SPEAKER_01And Gregory, if we're having a little spat, because I know somebody thinks it's Cold War. I don't have any ill will towards Gregory Chanowski. I have more ill will towards Mike, Richie, and Jerry.
SPEAKER_03Well, that's not what you said earlier about him, but anyway.
SPEAKER_01Oh shit. You're my buddy, Gregory.
SPEAKER_00So just throws us to the curve.
SPEAKER_03I know, right? I don't know how he sat next to you that entire. I mean, he was, as we previously established, the seats were so close. Like, how is Greg not in a panic that whole time? He was chill. He was very chill. And I vomited on him. Greg is the yeah, that's what I'm saying. Yeah. Like, yeah. And you have the audacity to say the things you you do about him. And you vomited on that one. You technically You gave him a Roman shower.
SPEAKER_01A Roman shower?
SPEAKER_03I think that's what it's called. Google that for me, somebody.
SPEAKER_01Well, they well, at least it wasn't a golden shower.
SPEAKER_03Well, actually, I don't know what it's worth, to be honest with you.
SPEAKER_01Well, you've had the golden shower.
SPEAKER_03Let's let's you know, let's keep those things uh, you know, uh stuff. This isn't this is a family podcast. Yeah, I'll do it. Oh shit. Yeah. Oh wait, we the only the only bodily fluids we want to talk about is puke. We don't want to talk about anything else. Okay. I'm sorry I brought that up. Oh, actually, you brought it up. I did bring it up, yeah. But um, yeah, uh, so when I grabbed your arm to get you up.
SPEAKER_01You were very you were very aggressive. I'm sorry, but I was very aggressive.
SPEAKER_03Here's the thing. We had our fill at that point. Everyone had to magically go to the bathroom, but me.
SPEAKER_01I know.
SPEAKER_03They did screw me.
SPEAKER_01Never trust these people in a fucking at least Mike came back halfway through. But Mike and Greg are Judases.
SPEAKER_03They just literally just they disappeared. So I grab so I attempted to get him up, you know, and he's like, he looks at me seriously, he goes, I don't think I could move. And I said, You're getting the fuck up and you're getting up right the fuck now.
SPEAKER_02And he goes, No, Richie, you don't understand.
SPEAKER_03I can't get up. I go, dude, you are getting the fuck up and we're getting the fuck out of here. And then he got up. He's like, I'm just gonna watch your shirt. Whatever, whatever that means. Like whatever the fuck that means.
SPEAKER_01I had like a pinhole of vision at that point, too.
SPEAKER_03So we we walk by. I don't even want to talk about who we walk by, but then there's wrestlers that are sitting there waiting for poor these these poor wrestlers who are waiting for autographs. Because they make no money. They make no money at these shows. I mean, they have other lives, and we're not saying that they don't make money in general, but just at these shows. They don't make anything. And they're probably waiting for somebody to sign an autograph, and here is this oath of a person.
SPEAKER_01What with my Frankenstein shoes or something? What did you do?
SPEAKER_03With your Frankenstein shoes and your and your cane and definition of white trash. Yeah, and Mike and I are looking like Secret Service walking like, all right, come on, let's go, let's go, let's go.
SPEAKER_00Making a path for Matt to get by. And watch our presents coming.
SPEAKER_03You got like a flashlight on the ground to make sure it's almost everything, but and then it's and then it's you know, it's uh it's a drive-by pretty much. It's you know, instead of a fart, it's it's it's puke smell. You know?
SPEAKER_01And it did. I got it to wave across the whole entire place, so I had to go all the other way around.
SPEAKER_03I should have been on a greenny. Actually, we thought about going. The EMTs were in the corner. Oh, right. Yeah, I think it was uh our friends to the left there were like talking to the prop proper people? Yes, well, the people that were very polite. Yes.
SPEAKER_00I I just feel bad for the the people that worked there that probably volunteered to work there. Yeah. They had to clean up his shit. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03This was at a fire hall, so in between their time volunteering to fight fires, they had to uh pick up Matt's bodily fluids, you know.
SPEAKER_01Well, I mean, that happens, you know. Life sucks sometimes.
SPEAKER_03It's for the kids, you know. It's for the kids.
SPEAKER_01And then what it what it what so we get out of there.
SPEAKER_03Well, by the way, real quick, before I just want to point this out. Apparently, for all you wrestling fans, the Sandman came at the end. The Sandman, who's like an ECW guy, a legend, Hall of Fame. A legit wrestler. Legit guy. A cool guy, too. Yeah, apparently he made a surprise appearance at the end. Maybe somebody can confirm this. And that's where I found this out like the next day on Instagram. I'm like, oh man.
SPEAKER_01I really, I really did fucking. You really did. I really did.
SPEAKER_03So then he's begging Greg to go to the we went to Comic Con today. Uh Nickel City Comic-Con here in Buffalo. Which was fun. Yeah, it was great. Nobody puked. No. Or or took edibles. Really? Not yet.
SPEAKER_00None of us.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's true too. And I did have a low sugar attack, too.
SPEAKER_00So I survived that and I didn't vomit. I I think I think the low sugar attack was BS. He just left us outside. Yeah. He just wanted to go in.
SPEAKER_03I can show you on the meet on the meter. So then on the way. I remember on the way home, we were scared to death because we were afraid Michelle was gonna kill you.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_03And maybe us catching shrapnel.
SPEAKER_01Oh my god. You got you I was terrified.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I well, and then you were like we were gonna just kind of like nudge you through the door and run away.
SPEAKER_00Just for the record, I had no part in the intoxication of Matt Stolton.
SPEAKER_03No. So Mike bought the edibles. Mike bought the edibles. We were actually gonna blame. We are we like we we our Greg and I, my plan was if Michelle got mad, we were legitimately gonna blame Mike, saying Mike forced the edibles on him. We were gonna.
SPEAKER_00It's like my childhood all over again. Everybody blames me for their fuck-ups.
SPEAKER_03So yeah, but you're so that was our plan to shove you through the door, and then you started guilting us.
SPEAKER_02You're like, I don't want my granddaughter to see me this way.
SPEAKER_03And like, oh shit.
SPEAKER_01Did I take my pants off and walk right into the bedroom?
SPEAKER_03Um, let me get to that part. So so you and obviously Michelle sees you shirtless. So she knows something's going on.
SPEAKER_00That shirt was disgusting. Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_03Oh, let's get to the shirt.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, we're gonna be. We're fast forwarding waiting. I apologize.
SPEAKER_03I we're we're not professionals here, folks. He's he wants to keep this shirt that he puked on. It's the most generic looking shirt you've ever seen in your life. It's a gray shirt.
SPEAKER_01I got it like Walmart for like literally like seven bucks.
SPEAKER_03Yep, you could buy a 30-pack on uh uh on Amazon. $5.95 on the NCAP. And it's so cheap they'll they'll ship it to you the next day, not even two days. That's how shitty these shirts are. The most generic shirt. He's like, I want to keep it though. It's like, are you fucking it's it's still in the grass behind the fire hall?
SPEAKER_00I should go see if it's still there. No, I threw it, I threw it in the garbage can. Oh, did you? The grass would have died instantly. Oh, sweat from on my sister holding it with two of my fingers. Oh that's right.
SPEAKER_01So it was vomit, vomit juice, chunks, and sweat. Yeah, I remember that was so to go back to the wrestling aspect of it, when I was like in that zone, and I did, I zoned out right before I puked. But I remember going, man, it's so fucking hot in here. Yeah. And Greg gave me a water, and it went in my hand. You had several waters. Did I?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Holy shit, I didn't know that. At one point, and this is me being a dick. You were you were like, I don't want to drop this, so every few minutes I go, Matt, don't fucking drop that, like trying to get you paranoid. I'm like, don't you fucking drop that? Whatever you do. And you were like, Greg wanted to take it.
SPEAKER_01I'm like, it stuck to my hand. Don't don't because I I felt like I had like that Spider-Man hand.
SPEAKER_00He was double fisting it and holding a tight tiger grip there. You just would not let that go.
SPEAKER_01I gave you my phone.
SPEAKER_00Yes.
SPEAKER_01And my key, and you had who had my keys? Greg had my keys. Probably Greg, because he was driving. I think I had like a hundred dollars in cash in my in my pocket.
SPEAKER_03I took that.
SPEAKER_01I remember wrong. Please don't lose any of this. And that's what I was like that was I was paranoid of that. It wasn't about the the sight of me. Yeah, we had to deal with that part.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, you guys had to worry about that. So uh oh man. But yeah, just to correct something, and and and Matt's not exaggerating. He was just it was his memory, but Matt wasn't yelling and booing people. He wasn't obnoxious, he was actually he laughed a lot. He made funny comments, but he he wasn't yelling loud because it Dr. Pepper. Oh my god. Doctor Who? Dr. Pepper? We wanted to go see a doctor. Dude, you would have thought it was like, and he just was so proud of his joke and just tearing the whole time.
SPEAKER_01I mean, I don't even think I said like Doc Brown from like Back to the Future. Like I was kept Doc Doc, what's the shoe? Doc Dr. Scholes? Doc yeah, Dr. Scholes. Yeah. I kept saying it, and I'm I'm crying. I'm la and all I'm doing is it's in my mind. So every time I would say something, it was like tears, but I couldn't move my hands to wipe my tears.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, because you had the cup.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Oh my god, it was so I was I was genuinely crying, laughing so hard. So if somebody walked by, they're probably like, there's this fucking fat guy crying to himself in the front row.
SPEAKER_03I think we all asked you if you were okay, because you were just like because you can't tell because you don't know like his his his he has a when he laughs, it almost looks painful. Like you have like a and I don't mean that in a derogatory way, I just mean like you Yeah, but it wins my act my face. Yeah, so it's hard to tell if you're crying or laughing, but you were laughing, but you were laughing so hard. You were crying, you were tearing.
SPEAKER_01I I was the I mean it usually is the I'm the funniest guy in the room, but I thought I literally was. I thought I could go up on stage and do like 10 minutes.
SPEAKER_03You could have.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Oh, that would have been funny, though. Well and then my final act would be the puke off the club. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03That was your that was your final act. Oh, the something the black guy. I like it. No, no, no, no, no. The the um primal warrior. Primal warrior or whatever.
SPEAKER_00Oh, yeah, and he could thrown down on uh out of the ring and he's like right there up against the gate where he threw up all over the place.
SPEAKER_03Oh man. He's a nice guy, actually. He's friends with my brother-in-law, he's a nice guy.
SPEAKER_01When that when that guy, the Primal Rage, he did like the ultimate warrior shake on the and I remember going to Greg and I'm c I'm crying, I'm laughing so hard. I'm like, what the fuck am I looking at? Because he's like, you know, he's like fifty five years old, sixty years old, and he's doing his thing and he's trying to get his body his body's like shaking. And I just remember looking at him going, What the hell am I watching right now?
SPEAKER_03Great. Greg tells it's so funny. He's like, Matt's sitting there high, staring at this 50-year-old man's balls shaking in Matt's face while he's shaking the ropes. It was funny. And then he puked. No, I think it was before that.
SPEAKER_01Oh, God.
SPEAKER_03So I grabbed your arm to get you out of there, and when I let go, it was like that stick, you know, where like your skin is like peeled to it. And I of course I washed my hands. And even though I washed my hands, I thought thoroughly. My dog was still sniffing my hand when I got home, which made me even like, oh, it's still there somehow. It was awful.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, bleach it.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Stick it in gasoline paint thinner. My God.
SPEAKER_01It's just like Michelle's gonna LA next to me at night.
SPEAKER_03Oh, I don't know how she did it. Oh yeah, so um we walk him to the truck. We didn't pull up. We walked him to the truck. Which was bullshit. Well, I I I was ready to drop you off on that main road over. Like that. I don't even know what road that was. Uh Hill Billy Main Street. Seriously, yeah. Big thumb. And he so we finally get the shirt off. I'm gonna sit in the front with the shirt. No, you're not. No, you're not gonna So we threw the shirt out. So he we open the door. We're not ready to leave. It's a free country. He doesn't have to get in yet. We're just hanging out. And he opens the door to get in. He goes, It's so hot in here. He didn't start the air conditioner. This guy. The ball's on this guy. No one told him to get in. He just is it's so hot. Why wouldn't you turn the air conditioner? Like we're supposed to know, you know, that you were getting in that goddamn truck at that point. Oh my at that point I was ready to just run him over and leave him at that point. I was I was I was over it, you know.
SPEAKER_01That fucking But you when when on our way home though, the whole Michelle bringing up Michelle. Oh man, that they'd scared the shit out of me. I bet it actually kind of sobered me up.
SPEAKER_03No, it didn't.
SPEAKER_01No?
SPEAKER_03No, no, it didn't. No, not even close. No, because then here's the thing. You say you you think you would say, okay, and I made this point. You'd say, okay, you guys, I'm gonna take the bolt on this one. So you guys just walk me in, I'll talk to Michelle, and then you guys can quietly make the exit just so you don't get anything from Michelle. We love Michelle, but I don't want to upset her, you know, especially with her husband making an ass of himself. So what does he do? He walks in and he and she goes, What happened? Because she obviously she sees him, no shirt. I believe, Michelle, you text your son saying, Hey, dad came home with no shirt. I don't know what's going on. Uh and then he just pretty much says, uh, what time do I have to wake up tomorrow? And she's going, What happened? And he's like not even acknowledging it. And then Michelle answers whatever the.
SPEAKER_01And it's like five o'clock in the afternoon. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And then he goes, Okay, I'm going to bed. And he and he walks away. He drops it, like, he's in this hallway over here. We're in uh Mitch Dolman studios, but if you go over here.
SPEAKER_00Mitt Stuhlman's studio.
SPEAKER_03Uh down the hallway, he just drops his pants. Thank God he's wearing boxers. Who would have known? He would probably. Tiny Whites. Tidy Whites. Yes, yes. Stains and all. Yeah. And just leaves us. So then it's it's Greg and I stand in there with Michelle having to explain what happened. And I'm trying to blame the temperature. I'm trying to blame the the candy. I'm trying and and an edible. Like I'm just trying to like low-key the edible part that Mike gave him. Because I was trying to protect Mike, you know? Yeah. So, you know. But yeah, like the dude just completely ditched us to to clean up the pieces. It was this is the kind of person we're dealing with here. The worst. Yeah. That was uh yeah, but you're like, I don't want my granddaughter to see me like this. You guys have to bring me in. Like, oh my god. Just just to establish this uh you uh your son lives down the pretty much down the area, you know. So um was the mic, is the mic working?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, but this counter isn't it?
SPEAKER_03Uh-oh. Are we recording still, folks? Can you hear us? Can you hear us in Turkey?
SPEAKER_00Well, he shows up there. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Oh, okay. It didn't catch up. It didn't catch up, yeah. Okay. So we're at we're at 25 minutes already. That's pretty good. And we still gotta talk about the parties. The parties. Some of the parties. Yeah, not all of them. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03But yeah, that was our experience. Um we went to Nickel CityCon today, and Matthew. Matt wanted to talk about a little bit. Well, I'm that's that's not my point. My point is, if you could let me finish.
SPEAKER_00See how mean he can be, guys?
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_00Don't interrupt Richard.
SPEAKER_03He wants thank thank you, Mike. With a T. Thank you, Mikey Fingers. Without a T, by the way. Um he was trying to get Greg to go to Nickel CityCon, and Greg's like, ah, it's warm out, I want to be outside. You know, every nice guy excuse Greg is trying to give to say, I don't want to spend another fucking minute with you. Because he spent a year trying to get Greg to go to this wrestling show. And what does he do? What does he do? So of course Greg is not gonna jump at the chance to go, yeah, let's go to this, because the last time you you said I'm gonna have a great time, what happened? So, uh So he's gunshot right now. Yeah, and I don't blame him. I don't blame him at all. So yeah, that was that was our WrestleMania Narnia. And then what was part two? The parties, right?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, then we had the party. So yeah, if you guys remember, if you guys are listeners, which there's probably I don't know. I seem like there's some s it's starting to spread a little bit.
SPEAKER_03I want to hey uh Turkey guy, how's it going, buddy?
SPEAKER_01And Oregon.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, we're talking to you. Yeah, and if you're in one of those places and you're listening to this, yes, you're the one. We're talking to you, that person.
SPEAKER_01And we thank you very much for your listen. Yes. I appreciate anybody's listening. That's right.
SPEAKER_03So, anyways, um so my first party, I couldn't even tell you the year. Matt Stolman party, I should say. Uh I was in my early mid-20s. I show up. This is in South Buffalo. This was the Fred Flintstone year. Do you know what year that was?
SPEAKER_01Oh my god. No, no. In the teens. So I was in a no, it was like early, it was when I was at it was when I was at the end It was before 07, it was around a long time ago.
SPEAKER_03So probably 05, 06, maybe. Yeah. So almost 20 years. Probably about 20 years ago. Yeah. So um I was in a couples bowling league back then, so my girlfriend and I came, and we w we walk down the street after we park, and I see Matt pass out in the bushes in the front yard of his house. And it's one of those things where it's out of the movies. As soon as he sees us, he kind of almost like wakes up and goes, Oh hey, what's that? And he he must have apologized like 30 times that night uh over his condition, which I you know, you know how sometimes wrong people get like apologetic. One of those situations.
SPEAKER_01So since we're talking about the that party, which is very specific. Yeah. Um when I when it was my boys who were in high school at the time, we would pay them to help clean, and Michelle and I, every year it was a fight. Every year there was a fight, as we're cleaning the entire house. And when we were done with the house, it would be referred to as party clean. Like everything either was either hidden, because you know Matt Stoltman will fucking throw up on phones and everything else, but everything that was kind of important was kind of put away. Sex toys. Yeah, everything was cleaned up, the bottles were there, the beer, the pop, the food was ordered or picked up, uh everything was done, and with chairs were out. And normally, and Mike can attest to this, there are times where we're finishing up cleaning and Mike in general show up. Like we are j you're there right as we're kind of still finishing up. But this time this on this specific party, unfortunately, I did not know Mike at the time, but this specific party, I was we were clean maybe about six o'clock, and the party didn't really start till seven, say. And so I'm sitting at the kitchen table, the whole house is spotless. I think Michelle's upstairs taking a shower, getting ready. I think you were hip hop girl that night. Remember, you had the baseball jersey or something? You were cute. But anyway, she she was wearing something like that.
SPEAKER_00And cute.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. And um I loved Southern comfort back then. And so I had like a 750 mil bottle of Southern. Oh. And I cracked it open at like six, and I finished the bottle before the first guest arrived. You gotta be fucking kidding me. I was drinking it straight. Oh, I put ice, I like it cold. Okay. I but I was drinking it just like ice cubes, fill it up, shake it, drink it.
SPEAKER_03And you and it's crazy because you don't have an like you don't you you're not a drinker drinker, so you don't have really like a tolerance that you could.
SPEAKER_01My dad's nickname was Two Beer Berry, and I'm like that. Okay. Mikey, we went to see Darkstar Orchestra last week. I had three beers and I was good. I wasn't like but I was like feeling good. Yeah. It don't take much.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, it doesn't take much.
SPEAKER_01But I drink and I don't drink during the year. Like, if you took out my parties, I drink the equivalent of maybe two or three beers in a given year.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01But the parties then just go.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that's where it's it gets.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and it probably won't happen every like my parties. I probably will do an edible. I don't think I'll drink. I'll maybe I'll have like water and maybe um what's that, deep eddy lemon? But I won't, I won't be drinking any of that every it'll just be an edible. But I drank a whole bottle of Southern. I was absolutely shit-faced before my first guest arrived. And so I went outside for the cold air because it's in October, yeah, and I sat on the porch, and I remember the twins, Sean and Derek came in, and I don't know if Jason and Lori, I don't know if anybody was with them at the time, but Sean and Derek looked at me and they go, Oh no. They know they knew I was fucked. Yeah. And so I'm sitting on the porch, and I would wake up just to throw up in the bushes.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And mind you, Michelle, and now granted this is October, so they're done. But Michelle always had a most amazing and beautiful um garden.
unknownIt was a bush.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, whatever, garden. She had a beautiful garden with all pretty flowers and and windmills and shit like that. And I just yacked over everything. But granted it was October, they were probably dead anyway. And then that's where Richie kind of is like talking about her. I'll let Richie talk about him coming up and seeing me in that state. I did get up and party. I know I danced one, and I don't dance for nothing. But I think I was so drunk I danced. Do you remember? I don't remember anything else about that party.
SPEAKER_03So what what's interesting, you made an interesting point about how the twins saw you, and then you like, did you was there a point where like Michelle looked at you and you remember?
SPEAKER_01No, because I think Michelle was so busy getting herself ready, like she'd never that's the only way we lasted. She has to ignore me. If she was to pay attention to everything I've done, she would she would have had a stroke by now.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_01So I think Michelle compartmentalizes me. So at that point in time, all she needed to do was take a shower and get in her out. And she didn't give a fuck about me at that point.
SPEAKER_03Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_01And not to say that she doesn't, but she didn't. That's love. You guys know that way too, right? Like, oh, he's he's at home. Fuck him. Yeah, pretty much. You know pretty much.
SPEAKER_03In a in a more loving way, though.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, in a loving way.
SPEAKER_03So um there was a mystery that's yet to be solved. I have a of that specific party. We stayed to the very end. Every almost everybody was gone, and something happened at the party, which I don't know what it was. I just remember with me? Well, let me explain. So it's a mist. I don't know what happened. That's what I'm saying, it's a mystery. So I just remember it wasn't you, it was something something something else that pissed you off and Michelle off. Because Michelle told you what happened, and I caught the talent of it. And we didn't have a relationship where I could say, hey, what was going on? I didn't want to pry.
SPEAKER_01We were starting this is the beginning of the.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah. And I was I was still a polite boy before I my innocence was ruined by Matt.
SPEAKER_01But um you're yeah.
SPEAKER_03She was talking about somebody that did something at the party, and you got so upset. I remember that your exact words were, well, now I'm sober. Like it sobered you up.
SPEAKER_01Michelle, was that when the black people pissed in the d in the driveway?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, well, well, a guest, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Is that what it was?
SPEAKER_00A guest.
SPEAKER_01Well, so the Shaniqua. Are we using I think she's Irish? I think she's Irish. Well, they brought random people to our party. Yeah, so I would invite, say, Mike, and Mike would bring nine boys from from BlackRock.
SPEAKER_00Riverside.
SPEAKER_01Whatever. Do you know what I'm saying? So I knew Mike, but I didn't know. But which a lot, you know who did that a lot? Was Steve. Steve would bring like his girlfriend, maybe his girlfriend's friends. Yeah. I think your your sisters came once. I think your sisters' friends came a couple times. Oh, Beth. Beth.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, of them. So like, but it's fine. They're behaved and but this Chinequa, she was the overnight. I worked at Cover Suites when I was going to school for being a teacher. But when I was going to school to be a teacher, and I go, Chinequa, you're more than welcome to. And she didn't work weekends. So she came, but I think she came with like two homeboys.
SPEAKER_02Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_01And the bathrooms were like, what I maybe they're fighting, who knows? Or again, they're from the east side, so I can't speak for that. But I think one of them took a piss in our driveway.
SPEAKER_03Oh, man. I've been waiting years to find out what that was.
SPEAKER_01That I think is what it was. Yeah. So Michelle found out, she got mad at me because like you gotta control your party. Yeah. And then I got pissed. Yeah. You know, because I'm like, what the fuck?
SPEAKER_03I think we were in the kitchen just hanging. Because it was at the end then. Like I think the music was even done. No, it wasn't the end.
unknownMatt was still waiting for the.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, because I always I always I was goodbye to everybody. Oh, okay, okay. I don't know, but I've got to be. There wasn't a lot of people left though. There wasn't. 20 years of parties, 10 of them being two parties. So say 30 total parties, give or take. And I would say I've only been there at the end for maybe like five of them.
SPEAKER_03Probably the late later ones.
SPEAKER_01Because I always just I really fucked Michelle over. Yeah. I would just like I wouldn't even tell anybody. I just go while you're just gonna buy, I'll go right upstairs and go to the back.
SPEAKER_03No, not that one. His friends put him to bed.
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah, there was a one. Yeah, that one but Sean and Derek put put me to bed, and they put a basket in front of my mouth, and they go, he's on his side, so make sure he doesn't sleep on his back so he doesn't choke on his head. What?
SPEAKER_00Derek Derek uh from Green Pass?
SPEAKER_01No, Derek, uh these twins, Derek and Sean. They know if if if you're listening, you know who you are. The brew crew. That was Jason, Derek, Sean, Caleb, and myself. What do you call the uh Snopes? Snaps? What were you? Um that was um what it was uh Spiff Spaff Spaff Spaff.
SPEAKER_03My god.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Laurie was in there. I know Laurie have been listening. Lori was in there, Renee was in there, Brian was in there. There's there was a Lauren, there were other people, but Spaff was Spaff. It was like bros before hoes.
SPEAKER_03Matt's still waiting for his uh change back from the poker game that you stole the money from. Oh, don't say that. Oh, excuse me.
SPEAKER_01I know she listened.
SPEAKER_03Oh no. Oh, well, guess what? A thief's a thief. Sorry.
SPEAKER_00Oh, is that a text message today? What's that?
SPEAKER_03No, she's no, we don't do that, but I know it, I know that's maybe uh take responsibility for your own actions.
SPEAKER_01Well, I didn't know it was happening. Wasn't I drunk that night?
SPEAKER_03No, I don't think so. But anyway, um yeah, that was a that was a crazy beginning of the party. Of my um party experience with Matt.
SPEAKER_01Had you known. Had you okay, with that experience, had you known everything that is done from then on to this, with all the bad things that I've done, embarrassed you at Well first of all, you you've not done it's it's let's Okay, go ahead. Embarrassed you at Regal. Yeah. You know, the I I know I've done a lot of things. Yeah, yeah. Would you have said, you know what, I'm gonna hang out with this guy?
SPEAKER_03Of course. Because they're not they're not that they're bad. They're bad because we make them the way I look at it is it's material for me to rip on you for. Like it's it's like that's my that's my you don't need to apologize because I have that. I have that, and I can remind you of stuff. And I I get enjoyment out of making fun of people.
SPEAKER_01But like that moment in time, I know I make you feel so. Oh, I mean not that asking the catwoman to whip me. Like you can whip me anytime. Yeah, that was at Comic-Con.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, Michelle, that that happened. Yeah, and then they went in the back. I don't get it, no. But um, yeah, that wasn't bad. That wasn't bad. I mean, because I could always go like, uh I'm walking this way, you know? It's it's when you get like a little uh angry. Do I get angry? I get angry. No, never, never. You never get angry. Never I blurt. Do I do I get angry? Not like when you have like I'll give you an example. Yeah, give me one. Sure. This is a this is it's a small one, but it's kind of what you do. So the the last practice we went to, the blue and red game, at the stadium last year. Okay. We go up there and you can't have your established you think it's your own Matt Stoltman handicapped parking spot because we didn't get there on time. So you you go, so I can't park there, and the people are so nice, by the way. That they deal with these assholes all day, but they are so nice. They have patience of the saints, all that stuff. He goes, I can't go there. Fine, he hits the gas real hard, and then they go, wait a minute, wait a minute, and he hits the brakes because they're gonna try to help him and say, and said, There's a go-kart that can get you if you go in this area, and he's like, Oh, okay, thank you. But you threw a hissy fit with your gas and brake pedal in both uh a guy that we who's now passed away, Dan, like were like, Matt, calm down. Like, we can just park over here, it's not that big of a like you threw a hissy fit with your your brake and gas pedal, like it, like a like a spark. I am a seasoned ticket. You were gonna drive off on those people when they were just so nice, and then when we went over there, they were like, hey, everything good? Like they were so nice. Were they though? They were, they're very nice. So you do that, but like honestly, I if I wouldn't hang out with you if I didn't it's just good to make fun of you for. It's not like it's I know I do road rage, but it's not like Oh my god.
SPEAKER_01But my my old road rage it's not like I'm following people home anymore.
SPEAKER_03Well you've all you almost got a two Well, you almost hit a car when you were parking today.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, but that wasn't road rage, that was just I didn't see it.
SPEAKER_03That's but yeah, so no. But no, no, I I you we we make fun of you, so it sounds like we're we're we're talking about the worst things that you've done right now.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03So it's not like it's not all bad, and if we're a sta if we're making it seem like that to the public, then well then good. We don't care. But you know, i it's it's not all bad. It's mostly good. It's just you know when you ask that question, it makes it sound like you're like the worst person in the world, you know.
SPEAKER_01No, I mean if you asked Michelle, she probably would say more.
SPEAKER_03I puked in your sink once at your party. But I puked in your sink. With dishes in it, mind you. Well, listen. No, there was no dishes. There was oh, thank god. That's it. I puked in a toilet before. Yeah, Jen saved you. I I don't think from what I heard it wasn't the toilet. Unless unless we're calling floors to the colour.
SPEAKER_01All I know is Jen said she saved Michael from being banned from the house. Because Michelle banned just I think I brought that up before Michelle banned people. And justifiably, I might not agree with it at the time.
SPEAKER_03No, Michelle's always been right about it.
SPEAKER_01Whether you agree with her or not at the time, she's right.
SPEAKER_03In the end, I would I yeah, and I've actually told you that. Like, listen.
SPEAKER_01And you know what? I even say this. Like, I will like when I meet nurses, doctors, whatever, I go, Michelle, I go, my wife's the matriarch, and everybody looks to her. And it might not be fair, but it is what it is.
SPEAKER_03I think it is fair.
SPEAKER_01Her mom was that way, and now it's Michelle's role, and she does the role very, very well. But like, no matter doesn't matter how old you are or how smart you are, you really do listen to Michelle.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I agree with that. And that's about as more Why do you think we were so scared to drop you off?
SPEAKER_01Man, I tell you, when she gets now, when she gets mad, that's a different, that's scary.
SPEAKER_03You were so dramatic in that car when you're like, I just don't want my granddaughter to see me this way. Dragonera, like, motherfucker, what the fuck else do we have to deal with now? That was rough. But um anyway, back to the parties. Um Oh yeah, I need to clarify something as well. Um so he talked about the uh where I was apparently uh uh making out with a a girl at his party, a random uh woman at his party.
SPEAKER_01So I remember that vividly. Okay, so. You heard the slapping of the tongues.
SPEAKER_03Well let let me let me say this. You you mentioned that there was a circle of people watching us, including my father. None of that is true. Your dad looked like little Bill from Boogie Nights. I was sitting across the table talking to this girl's friend. And these are your friends. Let's not let's not like sugarcoat like it was like somebody just came off the street, peed in the driveway, and then came in.
unknownNo.
SPEAKER_03These are these are your friends. She was wearing a devil's costume, I believe. She was. So I'm sitting talking to that person's friend, and she comes over, sits on my lap, and starts making out with me. I'm like mid-20s and drunk. What am I supposed to do? There was nobody else in the kitchen at all, just the three of us. And then Matt walks in and goes, That's disgusting. What are you doing? Like, I'm sorry. I I just I was sitting here, and then like I think he said I was raping her mouth. It was the opposite. Were you there for that one or not? No, that was before that was way before. That was like the next year, I think, or the year after. Something like that. So I wasn't putting on a show for a bunch of uh South Buffalo drunks in a circle. That was not happening. No, that you know, I I I may have been a little a couple sheets of the one myself, but I remember that very well.
SPEAKER_01She she very well might have this this that girl, I'm not even gonna say her name, but she could have she might have had that liver problem, like the other ladies that we know that we're talking about earlier. But she she was always drunk. And she drank, she liked the boxed wine. The what? The boxed wine.
SPEAKER_03Oh, the boxed wine.
SPEAKER_01So that was the chick you hook up with.
SPEAKER_03I didn't hook up with her. Oh, you hooked up with her.
SPEAKER_01Right in the kitchen.
SPEAKER_03Where my wife sleeps and my children come to play with their toys. But that was like the two big ones I I remember was, you know. And obviously the uh the uh you talked about uh Jerry and uh Tim Quinn we'll call 'em. Dead fight.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um that was a classic, the uh the pulling the pants up.
SPEAKER_01That was a crisp. Oh my god, that was so funny.
SPEAKER_03Jerry needs to come in here and defend himself. I think he feels like, you know.
SPEAKER_01When Michelle's friend saw him with his pants like up to his like nipples, and you saw like every dent on his ass. She fell in love. When no, no, she did not. Oh, and then we had Phil from Germany living with us. Yes. And He's like, oh my god, like he was like he was beat red laughing, my yeah. But he must have been like, What? I mean, by then he was been in America for four months, three, four months, so he knew, but like, oh my god, he must have been like, is this America?
SPEAKER_00So was that the first party Phil was exposed to?
SPEAKER_01No, this was uh Christmas Eve, if I remember correctly, wasn't it?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, you know what he was thinking? He was thinking these fuckers beat us in the war twice? These fucks beat us twice? That's what he was thinking.
SPEAKER_01I remember and that night we played Baldurdash. And I've and I kind of read it up before, but like Baldurdash, we never really played to win, I guess. We just played to laugh. But like you draw a card and it'll give you like five different categories, kind of like a trivial pursuit, but it'll be like a date, a word, a title of like a movie or book, a person's name, and like an item, I think. And so you and we're gonna we should play this high sometime. We should play it high on a podcast. Actually, that's a good idea. Yeah, it would be funny, but like it'd be like video for that, it'd be like a movie, like oh, a a burning light. So you you have all the people have to do like their plot for that movie, and then the person reading it has like say five people's version and then the real version, and the real version is not normal, like that. It's usually something weird. So then they he reads or she reads all of those, all of those words, like what what the movie's plot would be in this case, and you have to say guess which one was the correct one. And if someone gets yours, yay! And if you get the right one, yay, but other than that, that's it, right? And I think Richie started it off with Lexington Steel, yeah. An independent film starring Lexington Steel.
SPEAKER_03Lexington Steel, just so everybody knows, is a porn star an African-American porn star with a uh baby arm for a penis. Yeah, it's just so everybody. Well, of course, Matt knows that part. I do. But it's just so my favorite video. Yeah, I don't look at it every night. I believe at the end I was so drunk I just started putting like fuck Matt. Like as like one of the answers, like I wonder if that's the fake one, you know.
SPEAKER_01And Jeffrey was like still in high school, so he he sorry, Jeff. He wasn't drunk, but he was old enough. So it was funny because he would look at all the responses and he was just talking about it. I remember that.
SPEAKER_03I remember him.
SPEAKER_01And it's like you can't laugh before this because now everybody knows it's fake, man.
SPEAKER_03He couldn't read them, he couldn't get through him without laughing. It was so funny. It was Jeff, I remember that.
SPEAKER_01Shell would always win, or like Jen would win, or yeah, someone who's so somewhat sober, yeah, intelligent would win.
SPEAKER_03Yep, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Because I don't even know if I cared, but it was so funny. It was like the best. They're gonna play this game. It's so good.
SPEAKER_03Greg was really, really good at it. Like in a in a funny way. Like he was so funny. I don't even think he was drunk.
SPEAKER_01See, so I mean, I don't know where we're gonna go in the future, but like, um, there's gonna be opportunities to have some good times and um have you established here's the big question Have you established whether there'll be a party at the new house? There's gonna be a housewarming. Okay, but since we are gonna probably I think we just got the answer, folks. Well, this is the thing. Because it's because we're still gonna have this apartment, yeah. I'm thinking one of two things. I think we're either gonna rent out St. Teresa's, okay, or we're gonna rent out rent out that that thing that's in front of our apartment company.
SPEAKER_03Oh my god, we're gonna bring we're gonna bring Jesus into this. I don't think that's a good idea. What do you mean Jesus? St. Teresa's?
SPEAKER_01Well, they have like a gym or a uh thing. I know, but I just I mean then we don't have to worry about me throwing up on well, I could throw off.
SPEAKER_03As a Catholic, I don't I don't I feel I feel like we'd uh we're guaranteed our ticket in health. We bring up one of your parties to a church.
SPEAKER_01Well Ruthie would be a part of that, like she'd help bring in people. So we would have like a fucking Where is Ruthie like on this podcast?
SPEAKER_03Oh, I can't. She's dropping a ball.
SPEAKER_01She's got so much to share. I'm sure she does. She's got like two episodes of stuff.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01But he can't get her out of work. She's a workaholic.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. But those his parties are legendary. Um I'm trying to think of anything else. There was this guy. Who is Black Angus? Black Angus. Okay, so I was uh if you you people in Buffalo, you remember this crazy Monday night football game. I think it was in 07, and we played Dallas, and it was the craziest experience I had at a football game. It was like every first down was like a touchdown in a regular game. It was so loud. We ended up blowing the game in typical Bills fashion. We were up by two scores. Dallas scored. TO was still at Dallas. Dallas scored, got the two-point conversion, got the ball back on an onside kick, and kicked kicked the field goal and won the game. It was crazy. Yeah. It was nuts. And I remember these these cows there were cowboy fans everywhere, and there's these guys almost like they wanted to like kind of fuck with us and start a fight. And this guy named Black, he had his Bills jersey, it said Black Angus on the back. He grabbed them and pulled them away from us and said, Hey man, I got your back, old Bills. He was at your party. Oh, really? Yeah. I'm like, hey man, Black Angus, how you doing? And he's dude, I I must have been drunk. Really nice guy. Um I can't I was he a black guy? Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Was it Daryl Drayton? Was his name Daryl?
SPEAKER_03Like, yeah, big dude.
SPEAKER_01Did he have like the Michael Jackson?
SPEAKER_03Maybe, yeah. Yeah, there was Daryl. Glasses, maybe? I don't know maybe. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Really nice guy. He was at he was at our last Halloween party. Okay, okay.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, so yeah, he he actually like we were just sitting here watching the game and people were trying to, and he like intervened, like just that.
SPEAKER_01If I get Caleb and Daryl in here, yeah. I got five podcasts. Yeah, there you go. They have so many stories. I I I don't even want to bring them up just yet because I think I could save them for, but they those two guys are like you talk about me being a problem. Well, these guys, I these guys make me look like an amateur.
SPEAKER_03You really threw Caleb under the bus with that one story. So I believe he deserves a right to defend himself.
SPEAKER_01Well he does. It's true, and it was the probably one of the greatest things I've ever seen in my life.
SPEAKER_03I hope he comes back and tells some like really fucked up strip club stories. Like, no, actually, Matt, you were there for about an hour and a half. I was because I was waiting in a car for them. You you went so crazy that your picture's still up on the wall there. Do not let this guy back in.
SPEAKER_01No, it was it was Hank the Angry Dwarf.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. That's a great picture. I know I love that. I'm so jealous of that. Because he's, you know, now he's long past, so we'll never be able to do that again.
SPEAKER_01But I mean, uh, we're at 50 minutes. Yeah, I'm good with that. You got anything to say, Mike? You want to give out your social security number or anything?
SPEAKER_00It ain't gonna do anybody any good. Unless somebody wants to rebuild my credit. There you go.
SPEAKER_01Alright, so uh well thank you, uh everybody, for those who that it stuck around. Uh this will be uh our sixth episode, and I will have an episode uh in a few days for for the next one. So we'll have one more, two more will be uh up on the uh system before July 1st. So thank you very much.
SPEAKER_03And uh just say uh um bye person in Turkey.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, you guys from uh other areas of the country and world. I mean, tell us uh what you like or don't like. Please give me uh feedback. You can tell me how bad it is. It's all good.
SPEAKER_03They're gonna be like, I don't like that mat guy.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I would agree with them. I would agree with them.
SPEAKER_00Just talk shit to them.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it's like that's that probably is should be the podcast.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_03You know, talk shit to me.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Like that, what's that? Uh where you go to the fair and you throw the clown against you guys are the clowns.
SPEAKER_03Oh no, you are the clowns.
SPEAKER_01No, you're the clowns because I'm the guy trying to throw baseballs at you, but you I can't. I don't see that. So you guys just ridicule me.
SPEAKER_00No, we're handing we're handing the baseballs to the kids to throw at you. Yeah. You're the clown in all the time.
SPEAKER_01But the clown's the one who makes all the funny comments.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, but nobody likes them either. True. That's a very good point. All right.
SPEAKER_01Well, so with that, we're gonna we'll end it. And uh you guys have a good day or night or whatever.
SPEAKER_03Bye, world. See ya.
