Damn Did You Pinch the BIH!!

Somebody can talk big all day, but life has a way of answering back. We start with a rough, funny reset after realizing the mic wasn’t even recording, then we get into the phrase “pinch the big” and what it’s really pointing to: disrespect, weak character in the moment, and the kind of careless energy that creates consequences. This isn’t about trying to be tough for show. It’s about boundaries, accountability, and remembering that real-world rules still apply at work, at family events, and anywhere people share space.

Then I lay out the humbling moments that shaped my resilience mindset. I talk about getting hit by a car after a breakup and the real aftermath: fear, recovery, and learning situational awareness the hard way. From there it’s stories of childhood fights, backyard boxing with one set of gloves, and military martial arts training where size and confidence don’t matter if somebody has better technique. Each story builds toward the same takeaway: you can win some, you can lose some, but you have to learn something.

We close by turning those lessons into practical personal growth advice you can actually use: how to handle rejection, how to approach job interviews with confidence, why “the grass is greener” can be a trap, and why stagnation kills momentum. If you want motivation that’s raw, honest, and rooted in real experience, this one is for you. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs a push, and leave a review telling us what loss taught you the most.

Transcript

Recording Fail And Quick Reset

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Man oh man. Let's try this again. And I was just talking for 15 minutes and didn't even know I wasn't recording. But let's try this again. I hear the button and now we spinning. So welcome to the phone. Step was only. I'm gonna take it like this. I'm jacked. Play this fuck up, B. And we'll we're willing to tell you to sit down and watch a step for step. He don't full step his own. What am I gonna do with myself, man? Because I sat up here and recorded almost 20 minutes or 15 minutes or however, I don't even know. Of me just talking and me just sharing stories and this, that, and the third. But welcome to the podcast where we tell you to sit down and watch a step-a-step here on Four Steppers Only. I mean, we all fucked up.

Defining "Pinch The Bit"

SPEAKER_00 0:55

But let me tell you, today's episode is Damn, did you pinch the bit? And let's go ahead and get this straight. The term bit does not just describe a female. They're usually just a disrespectful female, but it usually takes, you know, build up with gentlemen like myself to get to that point for you to earn the term bit. But most times it's describing a man. And we call it and and and a lot of times we I see folks that earn those titles through and through. I know I've earned it. Was I acting like a bitch? Yes. Was it intentional? Yes. But I'm gonna tell y'all some stories about some days when some of us took an L, took an ass whooping, or anything else in between. And sometimes those ass whoopings are warranted. Because we all know, we all work with, we all got some family members that need their ass whooped. I can't do it. I even though I'm gonna I'll be looking at folks, like I just want to slap the shit out you because of dumb shit you done said, dumb shit you done did. Sometimes I just want to slap the shit out of you. I'm just being honest. Because I mean, we work with some people that like we look at them and the stupid shit that comes out their mouth, like I know you ain't. If I just slap the shit out you, would you get smarter? But let's go ahead and be honest. Some of y'all in this world that we live in now in 2026, just think because you have a mouth, and you can just can say whatever the fuck you want to to any fucking body. Some of y'all need your ass whooped. Real shit. Because I mean, when I was growing up, you couldn't just be blatantly disrespectful in any atmosphere that you walked in, whether it was work, the club, in somebody's neighborhood, a cookout, whatever the hell you were. Shit, hell, we'll even take it so far as church. I done seen somebody get dusted up at church and they sunday's best. But let's go ahead and be honest. Some of y'all need y'all's ass whooped just because y'all can't handle y'all liquor. Y'all be popping some big shit. Next thing you know, motherfucker on your it's like ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. And they come out looking like Martin did with all them lumps up and shit.

Disrespect, Drinking, And Consequences

SPEAKER_00 3:52

Y'all remember a couple weeks ago how my eye looked. That's how some of y'all need might need to look because it's like y'all feel safe in this environment that we are in now. Because some of y'all go to cookouts, some of y'all go in the wrong neighborhood, some of y'all go to different places, and y'all just get the popping for no reason or talking disrespectfully. What happened to the term of hey shit? I I need to respect the individual. I and I because I don't know him. That's like um me and my niece were talking yesterday. And uh, you know, I had the family over the house, and she was telling me about somebody that just got out of jail. I was like, oh shit. I said, I said, yeah, I said, I know him. She said, You know he's been out. I said, Yeah, I know. I saw he just got out. I saw on Instagram. You know, X, Y, and Z talking to him. I said, No, hold up. Her ex-boyfriend talked to his baby mama. I said, Ooh. Does he know what he signed up for? I said, because bro, bro, just sat down for eight years. And he I hope I hope on the up and ups, shit, he done, he done turned over a new leaf, but sometimes them yards make people a bigger, bigger monster. And I don't think he has the idea because this individual that we're talking about proclaims to be the big bad wolf. There's always an alpha wolf ready to knock out knock another wolf off. But time to get to my stories. Enough of these motherfuckers. So, you know how some people say those humbling moments and the the life and endurance that we learn and we learn about during life and this, that, and the third. Teach you how to stand back up after shit. Oh, I had a bunch of them. Well, I got hit by a car one

Humbling Story: Hit By A Car

SPEAKER_00 6:00

time and had to get up and walk a mile to the house, then get transported to the ER by my mom. Just because I said I wasn't gonna, I didn't want to be with somebody no more. Humbling moment. Guess what my dumb ass learned? If you're gonna break up with somebody, make sure your ass on the sidewalk. Do not walk in the street. Because only I heard was I'm talking about boy. I if I if I describe this shit to you, y'all gonna think this shit was a horror movie. Well, all I heard was I'm like, man, I don't see no lights. Man, somebody driving fast, but I don't see no lights. Next thing I know, at the last second, them motherfuckers turned on. I said, Oh boy, I had glass all in my shoulder and my head. I had braids at the time. Oh, did I have locks? I don't, I can't remember. Um, I either had braids, I had I know I had hair. Man, I ended up with four bruised ribs, two broken ribs, a bruised knee, bruised hip, mouth concussion. Because I said I didn't want to be with nobody no more. I learned a valuable lesson. Boy shit, I tell y'all this. Boy, I had PTSD for the next goddamn month. Boy, I was scared to walk down a sidewalk. I was scared to walk beside on the inside next to the curb in the street. Boy, I wanted to walk all the way close to the building because I'm over here looking on my soul. Boy, I'm hearing cars pass in my dreams. But uh, and by the way, that is a real story though, and all the extras. Um, like my cousin, uh, my cousins Za. Not Zai, Zai is my son. My cousin Tremaine and Cha. Those are the two individuals that have Cha Cha gave me my first like two-piece that I actually earned. Damn, dog over there having a fucking asthma attack. He done ate some bullshit. Go ahead and kill yourself. Go ahead, go ahead and kill yourself. You done ate some shit. I don't know what the fuck you done ate. Go ahead. You over there having a whole convulsion. Uh-uh, don't come back over here, bye. I'm sorry. My bad, y'all. I was talking to my dog. Sometimes you gotta talk to your kids. Hey, you

Fights, Family, And Hard Lessons

SPEAKER_00 8:25

gotta talk to your kids, the your dogs like they're kids. They understand, but they don't understand. All right, whatever. But back to the story. So my cousin Chai gave me a two-piece. And well, I'm talking about he was the first person to ever make me see spots. Cool, no problem. It is what it is, it ain't what it ain't. Next thing I know, shit. I went back home. I told my mom, I don't want to go back home in there and play. I ain't played too rough. She's telling some, what happened? You all red in the face, nose all got on red, face all red. Charlie hit me. She said, Okay. Are you dying? No. Go back out and play. Bye. So I went back around there. Guess what that learned told me? Sometimes you're gonna take some L's. But don't be afraid to take an L. So it's like my cousin, my cup, my other cousin Tremaine. He told me, hey, come on over here, shoot, blah blah blah. We're gonna, we gonna, you know, we boxing, we we we doing boy stuff. Okay, cool, no problem. So we just went in there. My daddy just gave us all a haircut. And we get back outside in the front yard. We got one set of boxing gloves. Not two sets, one set, the right and the left glove. But it's some this some this some there's some hood stories that y'all don't understand that that gotta be had sometimes during life. He threw me the right glove. I said, oh, I'm about to do him. He got the left glove. So if y'all don't understand the dynamics of this, you're only supposed to swing with the glove that you have. So boom. So we you know, we we working on our right, working on the his left hand is his offhand. Cool, no problem. Shoot, and he's his offhand. I man, I'm about to dust him up. Remind you, we're like 12, 13 at the time. I came around, boom. I I think I just got there, I gotta hit him. Boom, boom, you know, cycling. I was like, ooh, hoo, hoo! You know, he caught him off guard. He's like, Oh, yeah, oh, oh, I gotta take it a little tough on you. Remind you my cousin Tremaine of uh a couple years older than me. Next thing I know, Tremaine done bounced back. He done came up. I'm I got my guard up. I came back in for a doing man. He slipped that other one and just clay. Man, man, I got hit so motherfucking hard. I saw spots. I saw them little gnats that be in your eyes. Well, I could I had to I had to get my footing right here. He hit me so damn hard, I didn't know what the hell hit me. Then on top of that, shit. I mean I've been in a good number of fights growing up. I mean, shit, even when I was in the military, shit. We used to do uh Mi'kmaq, like Marine Corps martial arts. Like we used to work out three times a week, um, rolls, chokeholds, um different stuff like that. You know, we used to just prepare ourselves. I mean, because we're we're gladiators, we're we're warriors until hollow. So we would do that three times a week. Shit, I was a lot smaller then. I was just like 200 pounds. Right now I'm 240. So I'm in there. Um we got nothing but like our boot, uh, our boots on, our boost bottoms. This dude comes in, he weighs like 160. So I got 40 pounds on him, and everybody knows I'm nice, but shoot, I I yoke you out real fast. But I ain't know what this dude knew. So we in uh I'm talking about we tussling, da da da. We got a stance going on. Woody who man, why this motherfucker spider monkey my ass while I was standing up? I'm talking about full-on yoke, had me losing my legs, got limp, and he just let lit like I can't even talk. It had me so messed up. It had he lightly laid me back down to the ground, like I was an infant baby, like I was still on the nipple. I mean, shit, you're gonna win something, you're gonna lose something, and that's what I have to tell my kids

Risk, Growth, And Resilience Mindset

SPEAKER_00 13:20

all the time because in life, you're not always going to win. Sometimes you're gonna lose. Sometimes life is gonna knock you on your ass. But it's how you get your footing back up and go back in headstrong. That's like when you go to an interview, you don't get a job, you give up fine looking for work, you look at you, you you don't try to make yourself better. Hey, they they might have had already their pick. But guess what? It doesn't discourage me from going to the next place, doesn't discourage me going for the next place, doesn't discourage me going for the next place. Because you would you will get uh ill, and like we tell, like I tell people all the time, or I tell my kids most of all, it's never a loss, it's always a lesson. You you we will never learn the most we can from winning all the time, you learn from losing. Oh don, I took that on the chance, so I lost this a bunch a bunch of money. I made this bad investment. Hey, I jumped too quick without doing my research over here at this new company, but I just knew they would they they were giving me a better title with comparable money. Hey, sometimes you gotta realize the grass ain't always greener, it's always it might be fertilized with more bullshit. So that grass is gonna look greener. You gotta understand the bullshit that comes along with what you signing yourself up for, or what you taking a risk to accomplish. Because I mean, shit, let's go ahead and be honest. Everything ain't meant to be a win. Because if we all won from our experiences, everybody'll be a millionaire. If you keep trying and learn from your mistakes and learning from those efforts, shit, you bound to do better. You bound to grow. So what I mean, what do we do? Do we just stay stagnant or do we still take those risks? If it is no risk, there's no reward. I mean, we gotta do something. We gotta do something to make us better. We gotta do something to be hungry, attack, attack something. I mean, we gotta do something. Instead of just taking, taking like, oh well, I'm comfortable here, so I guess I'll just stay. No, I'm not staying. If I'm unhappy, if I can't find one piece of enjoyment, shoot, I need to move the fuck home. I need to make myself better. I may make myself more marketable. I need and that's in every aspect. You think we all don't take hits? We all you we all don't take losses? I done took plenty of them. Big ones, small ones. And had to figure and had to learn from it. To where to the point where I don't have to teach my kids that there's no way out. You make a way out. You make yourself a way. If they don't wanna, if they don't want to let you in the door, you kick that bitch down. You make sure they feel like you the best option. And no matter what you do. Because if we don't strive to, if we don't teach our kids these things, to let's go ahead and say it. You can you tell your you treat your kid and tell your kid that everything's gonna be okay, Johnny. Hey, it's gonna be okay, just suck it up, go out your way, don't try again. They will be the bitch. They will forever be at McDonald's. But you gotta give them the encouraging words to say, fuck this. Hey man, what did you learn from the interview? What did you do different? Well, okay. So what you gonna do different? Attack it differently. Go in there knowing that you got the job. Boy, there, uh, I ain't I don't think I'm gonna get the job. No, if you if you feel like you ain't gonna get the job before you even get there for the interview, don't even go. You're gonna defeat yourself before you even walk in them folks' face. So now you go in there saying, I got this, this is mine, I conquered it. You gonna speak and you're gonna speak more confident, you're gonna feel more enthusiastic about earning that spot instead of just taking it on the chin. Shh, shh. If we want to talk about losses, we talking about man, I done got my ass handed to me. I done learned the most lessons from life. Going through shit, experiencing shit, making the bad worst decisions. But like I told somebody else, I said, it's never a loss, it's always a lesson. When you look at, when you try

Teaching Kids To Keep Swinging

SPEAKER_00 18:55

to look at somebody else's life compared to yours, you don't know what that man took to get in your shoes. That's why I I told somebody one time, they asked me in an interview, um, a job interview, what makes you better than all the other candidates that are going up for this position? I said, I can't say that. I can't answer that. Because I don't know what what took this, what made what path this man took to get here where we're at today. I don't know what his path was designed out. I don't know what losses he took. I don't know what the checks on the chain he took. I don't know what ass whoops he took from life to make him the man that he is, a man or woman that he is today. So I can't answer that. All I can tell you is what I bring to the table and what I've been through that have made me the man I am today. That has taught me to be the father, the ex-husband, the supportive co-parent. The support the single dad. Shit, not even leave that shit out. It took a lot to get here. So I'm never gonna take that away from another man. I'm never gonna take that from another woman. What you won't do is you won't sell me short. Won't make me go on this bitch blind. Because if I'm in a because I like I tell people all the time, if you even let me in the door, that means I'm boxing. That means I'm fighting until I come out. And that's how I want everybody that that's that's that stepper mentality. You are not gonna take away shit from me. You're gonna make me take, you're gonna make me lose. You're gonna make me goddamn show me, you're gonna show me that you're better than me. No matter what aspect, you're gonna have to prove to me that you better. You're gonna have to prove to everybody else you better. Because I don't give a fuck whether you knock me on my ass, tell me, make me feel like shit. Don't matter. Because guess what? I'm still gonna stand the fuck up on your ass. I'm still gonna be here. Because guess what? Regardless of like I tell people, if they let me in the door, I'm boxing. I'm fighting. Because guess what? I'm gonna show you why I'm in this room and why I deserve to be here. Not why you think I need to be here, why I deserve to be here. Because ain't no man on this planet gonna tell me that they better than me. You're gonna have to show me. And that's the way I approach life. That's why I tell my kids, go for it. Ain't for the stars, landing on the moon. Because if you keep your your your your shit all the way up here, and you land just like right here, keep crawling, keep goddamn through the mud. Hey shit. In life, everything gets a little dirty. You just gotta learn how to brush that shit off, keep that shit pushing, strive to be better. Because if we ain't better, then what are we? If we're not trying to be better, what are we? If we're not striving to be the best version of ourselves, what are we doing? Stagnant? There's no life in stagnant water. When you when you set a bucket of water down and they got that little film on top and it's been sitting there for a couple of days, it's the first thing you're gonna say, oh, that's nasty. But when that bitch is fresh and that bitch got life in it, you see the goddamn mosquitoes and the fishes and shit swimming all around in there. You'll dip your you'll dip your rod in there. Remember, there's no life in stagnant water. Is he gonna get in and survive? And show these motherfuckers why you deserve to be here, or come out fighting.

Final Motivation And Sign-Off

SPEAKER_00 22:57

But that's all for four steppers. Only we out. Peace. Man, let me go get my ass ready for work, man. I don't know why I'm around here bullshit.