What We've Learned So Far
Women, wizened by experience, presence, and attention, gather to discuss topics of depth in a world deeply in need of softer, fiercer, clearer perspectives.
What We've Learned So Far
Connection + Community
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What We've Learned So Far gathers a group of wise women around life's big questions and everyday experiences. We explore what we're learning about life, relationships, purpose, community, and what it means to be human in a rapidly changing world.
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In this episode our wise women explore Connection + Community. And these are some of the questions we’ve posed for ourselves:
- Why is connection important to us personally and to society as a whole? What purpose does community serve?
- How do we build and maintain meaningful connections in our daily lives?
- What impact does disconnection have? What are some ways to re-engage once we’ve felt disconnected?
- What are the barriers to connection in our society?
- What visions do we hold for the future of community and connection?
Our panel of wise women:
Our Moderator for today’s episode: Ceres Ruzich: www.awakensphere.com www.globallightworkersunited.org www.lololight.org
Kay Eck kay@kayeck.com @kayeckwrites (IG) Kay Eck (FB) @kayeck1040 (YouTube)
Ashley Phoenix Guastalli www.ashleyphoenix.net @ashleyphoenixofficial (IG) ashleyphoenixofficial (FB)
Lynnda Pollio: lynnda@frequencyfineart.com frequencyfineart.com
Video Production by Cyber Citrus Creative: https://www.instagram.com/cybercitruscreative/
Music and Performance by Keith Hill: https://www.instagram.com/khillcorp/
Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. This is what we've learned so far. Hello, distinguished panelists. It's so lovely to be with you all here today, and I think we're going to have a really interesting conversation. This is a topic that I know is close to all of our hearts. And so let's get started. Our moderator for today is Cerise Rusich. So I'm going to turn it over to you.
SPEAKER_02Well, thank you so much, Kay. And yes, this is a topic that's very near and dear to my heart. It's connection and community. And so, you know, to kick us off, I'd like to ask each of you the same question, which is when you hear the words connection and community, what comes to mind for you personally? But also before you answer the question, if you could, you know, do a quick introduction of your name and any anything else that you want to share. So starting with Ashley.
SPEAKER_03Okay. Hi. Thank you, Cerise. Thank you, Kay, for the opportunity. Linda, always so good to see you on the panel. So my name is Ashley Phoenix. I'm located in the Sedona area. And um for me, I mean, community is just vital to my divine purpose. There, I have a deep, deep desire and a deep prayer for people to gather. And a lot of uh before I even was aware of my spiritual awakening, I was fascinated with community. Um, my degree is in sociology, which is all about the study of why we gather and how we gather. So I'm excited to have this conversation today. Um, so when you hear the words connection and community, you know, for you personally, how does that, you know, what do you think about uh for me I I think of I think of gathering, I think of heart resonance, I think of magnetism, I think of um for me when a when a community is is functioning, when gathering and connection is functioning, it makes me think of um oneness and completion and and unity consciousness. Thank you.
SPEAKER_02That's beautiful. Uh Linda, can you introduce yourself as well?
SPEAKER_04And yes, my name is Linda Palio. I also live in Sedona, Arizona. And um I don't think there's anything more important right now than community and connection. I think that the lack of it is what kind of got us into the mess that we're in right now. Um, and when I think of it, I'm all about frequency. So for me, it's all about the resonance and the coherence that occurs when people come together like-minded, but mostly more about whether they resonate. We could differ on opinions and what we believe, but if we're resonating, particularly from the heart space, then those connections are almost like a spider's web, and it just can helps us connect in many ways. And also, community and connection are not just about us humans, it's also our connection and the community of everything else on the planet. Um, I have a real strong connection to the animals and birds in Sedona, and they are part of my community as well. So I think um, yeah, it's it's really all about how far does that connection um go outside of where you are into human and other sort of aspects of what's on the planet, but I'm um it's all about frequency for me.
SPEAKER_02So can you describe for us all a moment or image that represents community and connection for you?
SPEAKER_04Um Well, I think if you get people, even just what we're doing here, but you get people together in a room and you don't have to say anything, really. I mean, we do speak, but I mean, the image I get are people just being in a space together and having a sense of connection without even having to speak, um, either because they've already done that and they know each other, or they are um they sort of have a sense of who they are. When you have a sense of who you are, it's easier for you to connect with people without speaking. So I think it would be kind of just being in a place without speaking and yet understanding and knowing everything that's in that space with you.
SPEAKER_02Yes, very true. I've experienced that as well and and know it to be true. Um Kay, um, can you answer the question also for us? When you hear the words connection and community, what comes to mind for you personally?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, thank you so much. I'm Kay. I'm coming today from um the beautiful state of Michigan. I was down by the lake earlier and it was like the most supple, softest water. It was just so beautiful. Um, so when I think about uh the connection through community, what feels resonant to me is that there is an allowance that that there's a space that allows for authenticity to come forward. So it's almost like you're it's easier to be yourself. And and sometimes we have, you know, we're lucky enough to have that in our families, uh, sometimes not so much. And so we often because humans seek authenticity, they they then will seek outside connection to for for that expression. And so those uh made communities differ from the given communities, um, and sometimes they're even more important to us because there is just this feeling of safety and ease of being. And I think that uh there's a usually like a shared value, and the shared value is oftentimes revolves around um being supportive of one another, being accepting and and supportive. So that's what I think of when I think of connection and community.
SPEAKER_00Um, and how does that show up in your life now?
SPEAKER_01So I think that many of us have had the experience of at different ages in our lives being really drawn to our group of friends, like really desiring a group of friends, having our friend group rise in importance in our lives, seeking that out and tending to that. Um, I have found that different, you know, like I I have an evolutionary journey um with my communities. And so in the past, they may have um been based on just proximity, you know, who's in your neighborhood or who's in the group that you're parenting your children with. Um, but as I get older and um have been on my path, then the the values have shifted, and now I am looking for people who are willing to be authentic and who are willing to be supportive even when they disagree with you. So the first time that I consciously um sought to create that community for myself was when I opened my yoga studio um in the suburbs of Chicago. Um, and the the shared value that I established as part of the founding of that studio was that I wanted everybody who came in the door to feel the palpable love and acceptance of the studio. And so that did end up drawing people to the studio. And that's kind of what we based the relationships on. Like this is a place where this is what we're doing. And um, so that was the first time that I was consciously involved in creating and maintaining community and enjoying it as well.
SPEAKER_02I can completely relate to that because of opening up the wellness center in New Jersey. So um my name is Cerise Riesich and I live in New Jersey, and I've um recently opened up uh with a business partner a wellness center, and similar to uh Kay, what you've shared with your yoga studio, uh we have we're trying to do the same thing. We're trying to create and build community. But um similar to Linda's comment too, I I believe, you know, uh right now there's there's no time that community hasn't been as ever as important as it is right now. And so trying to build that in the wellness center, trying working on a nonprofit to also build community online for people. Um and as a mom too, I think, you know, to your comment, Kay, about at this point in life, I I think for majority, you know, up until four or five years ago, I never did anything with connection and community for myself. Um everything that I had done was for my kids. And I, because I was working so much, I never thought that I had the right to do things for myself or find that connection and community. Um, and then when I found it, I realized how important it was, how it was missing. And it's one of those things about like putting the oxygen on yourself first. Um, I need that connection and community, you know, for my own well-being so that I can show up and be the best, you know, version of myself for me and for my family. So I've never realized how important, you know, connection and community really is. And now I just seek it in any, you know, in so many different ways. You know, I'll take a class and I'll, you know, rip out a piece of paper in my notebook and pass it around and ask everyone to put their phone numbers and emails and, you know, and get gatherings so that, you know, to build that community, even in on an organic grassroots way, um, because I see so much value in it. But um, Linda, if I can ask you on a scale of one to 10, how important do you think connection and community are in your own life and why?
SPEAKER_04Um, well, 10. And um, it doesn't have to be, I am not a big group group type of person. I mean, I don't like big communities, but that's just my personal thing. I I I need to keep my energy on a tighter level. So my my community can be smaller, it can be just a few people, but um I think community is someplace that we find safety, safety to be ourselves in way that ways that we can't really be ourselves, particularly those of us that are on this crazy spiritual path that we ended up on. Um, a lot of times we're not really understood by the wider community, the community of our families or the community of our businesses or religions or whatever it is. So usually those communities that we fall into are tend to be small, um, particularly if we're moving, if we move into new areas that not many people inhabit. So I think it's it's critical because first of all, you know, I can't see my blind spots. So I need I need community to see parts of me that I'm not seen, um, and I need them to hold me um in a place of safety when when I feel that I need a place of safety. So um I think it's um I don't think it matters how large a community is. Your community can be one or two other people as long as you are seen. A big part of community is the fact that you're seen. And that's something that our culture doesn't really promote in any real way because it wants to homogenize us all. So community allows us to take the parts of ourselves that are not seen by the larger um world and um which are usually the ones that really make us feel like us and celebrate them.
SPEAKER_02Has that number, because you said 10, has that number uh changed over time? And if so, what influenced the shift?
SPEAKER_04Well, I think um I've always been on the loner side. Um, so but I've always been, I've sort of been, it's been unusual because I've always been a loner, but I've always been surrounded by people. I've always had a I've always had some kind of community around me, but I may not have resonated with them. They were around me, but I wasn't resonating with them. But um, I'm sorry, I forgot your question. It just went out of my head.
SPEAKER_02Um, has your number 10 changed over time? And if so, what influenced that shift?
SPEAKER_04Um, I think it's become more important as I've gone deeper into um my trip through consciousness and understanding frequency, because this is all uncharted territory. So the idea that I have people that I can say, what do you think about this? Um am I crazy? Or um can I, you know, I'm thinking about doing something, does it make sense? That's become more important to me because I'm not just looking to be liked, um, I'm looking to be understood. And I'm looking for people that can help guide me towards my own understanding. So I think as I've gotten older, the idea of community has gotten stronger, but less. When I was younger, you know, I was running with bigger girl packs. You know, we were we were out having a good time and there were more of us, but but the connection was not as strong. I think now it's I have less people in my community, but those connections are more powerful and and more meaningful.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, um I can definitely relate to that. Um and I'm sure many of us can as well. Um you know, there's so many people that have shared that I've heard where they said they want to go back to you know their 20s again, and I am enjoying this voyage that I've been on so much more because the relationships are so much stronger and better. Um but I mean everyone to each their own. Um Ashley, would you say uh connection and community are personal strengths for you or areas you've had to intentionally work on?
SPEAKER_03Ooh. Um I think that it's been a growth for me when I think of the trajectory of my life when I when I started when I, you know, in my childhood, I was kind of a loner. I maybe had one friend, maybe, and uh and and often spent a lot of time alone. And then as I went through uh my spiritual awakening, I I started to understand how important community is for everything that Linda shared, being witnessed in the imperfect experience of humanity, utilizing kind of the mirror of others, understanding when two or more gather, the the power of that energy, like all of these things kind of I started to learn how important it was to gather and and how important it is uh to have those heart connections and how healing it is, especially if you're someone who spent a lot of time uh in your youth, you know, alone. And um I think I think what I learned, you know, during the the global shutdown of uh what was it, 2020. Uh, I I started that like it became critical uh to be able to gather. It was it was almost like a statement of protest in some ways, whether gathering virtually or in person, there was like this profound shift where I understood that in my solitude, I was more susceptible to things guiding me towards fear and separation. But when I was gathering with people, whether it was through phone calls or virtual or even gathering together in a park or over an intimate dinner, I started to realize that there was something defiant about gathering, especially from like a heart connected place. And so for me, I've observed over time the magic that exists within community and connection.
SPEAKER_02And what specific habits or experiences shape that? And have you ever been surprised?
SPEAKER_03For me, I thank you for that question. For me, there's always a healthy curiosity, and that has been a tool that I've used. So anytime a group is gathering, I ask myself, well, why is this group gathering? Do I align with the why of this group? And then why am I drawn to be a part of this group? Is it something that's in alignment with what their intention is? So so I kind of approach, I hope I'm answering your question. Um, but I just I just feel um that there's something in that healthy curiosity. And I've also learned over um over my my time with community is like I'm willing to try things twice. So like I'll explore like a community experience um once because it's coming from a curious space, and and then a second time to see if I genuinely resonate with it or if I don't resonate with it. And so that's I don't know, I feel like there's some alchemy and magic in that.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, and part of the question too is whether it was a strength of yours. And you didn't specifically call out, yes, that it is a strength of yours, but I'm gonna say, as someone who knows you pretty well, that I absolutely think it's a strength of yours because I have seen you, you know, connecting with people and building community. And I think it just comes really naturally for you, from what I've personally witnessed.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, thank you. I can see I was avoiding that question. See why this is an example of why community is so great, because we gather and we see these things. And um, I guess what I'll share in addition to that is I I fall in love. I fall in love with soul. Anything that is soul in in the human experience, my heart just uh just opens. And so being in spaces where there is safety, which is something that Linda shared, when when there's this mirroring effect, when there's this when two or more gather kind of energy, and that soul shows up, it's like you can never forget that. You can never forget that soul that you met. And it there's just this resonance and it's so beautiful. And um, and I think when you feel that, you just want to be a part of creating that for others. And so I would say, yes, it is a strength, and it's something I'm very passionate about. Thank you.
SPEAKER_02Thank you, Ashley. Uh Kay, do you currently have a community you feel deeply connected to? And what makes it feel like home for you?
SPEAKER_01I do have a community that I feel connected to. I mean, this is certainly a reflection of that. Um I have um I always have a desire to build that community, um, but that's something that really occurs. This quite slowly and intentionally, I have found. And what was the second part of the question? Sorry. What makes it feel like home? Ah. Well, like I said, it it's like there's it it there's an ease to it that that you can you can be yourself in those in those times. And you know, I think there's also um a lot of joy and uh fun. And um what I really look what's fun to me now that maybe wasn't present before was that's not true. I've always been like a seeker of depth. And so when I was trying to find my community when I was in high school and college, it was much more difficult because those aren't really the breeding grounds of depth. And so I would just be off in a corner observing. And, you know, um, now that I have found like minds who are also interested in that depth, um, yeah, I feel really at home and the just the the ease of being.
SPEAKER_02That's beautiful. I yeah, I've um I've had similar um feelings growing up and being in different groups and and now the depth of conversations and to what Linda shared too about just being able to be in each other's company and not necessarily have to speak or say anything, but that there's a comfort in you know being in that community um and being in you know a space of oneness, yeah, you know, and authenticity.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and I just want to add that I feel like we have the capacity to have different communities that serve different purposes in our lives. So, you know, I have this um uh a community of ceramicists who, you know, I don't necessarily share the deepest levels of my longing, but we do talk a lot about glazes and clay and firing temps. And so um, you know, I think that we're we're sort of at this stage where we're learning that like our lives are a learning ground for how the family of humanity is meant to work together. You know, it's like you can be part of these larger communities without having to have certain things in place. And then you also have your own intimate little pods where you know you can explore the things that are truest to your heart. And I think that we're really learning um how to connect on various shared values, you know, even the most basic ones like life. Like here we are living life, and so that's a community. It's a community of life livers.
SPEAKER_02So I um I have this memory of when I was in my 20s with a friend in Greece and Athens out at dinner, and we saw this couple, and they were an elderly couple, probably in their 80s, sitting next to each other in complete silence. They were not talking to each other, they were smiling. And I looked at my friend and I said, My gosh, I was like, I hope when I'm, you know, one day when I'm married that, you know, I have more in common with my husband and that, you know, when we go out, we're talking to each other. And she said, No, look at the love they have for each other. They are so connected to one another, they don't need to be speaking. And they are just, you know, enjoying being in each other's company and they don't even need words. They're communicating through their body, you know, through their minds, and they're just, and I didn't understand that in my 20s. And it, I understand it so much more now that the beauty of being in someone's company and being your authentic self, you know, in community and the value and importance to it, and and also to be in company with people that will call you out and and will challenge you and question you and you know, tell you, you know, the truth when you need to hear the truth and be that mirror for you when you need it. Um, and so there's there's something so magical and beautiful about having, you know, that can and finding those people. Um, and you know, whether it's one person or you know, or more to have that connection and community with people that can be true, honest, and that you can be authentic with. Um Kay, another question for you. Um, how do you personally build and maintain meaningful connections in your daily life?
SPEAKER_01You know, I went through this evolution where when I was a kid, I I just longed for friends. I just really, really longed for friends. And I didn't often feel like I had the friends that I that I wanted. And then I I think that that there was a lot of insecurity um within me of what I had to offer and who I was. And as I became more confident in who I was and more more comfortable and more authentic about who I was, I I noticed that people started to be drawn to me. And at one point, um I had what I would consider to be a very large circle. And it was so large that I found it to be a little too much. And um, so even though I loved all of these people and wanted to maintain relationships with them, I found that I had to like narrow the group down so that I could have a more profound uh experience with my friends. And so I started to become very intentional about who was in my community and and the ways and frequency with which I was connecting with people. I still connected with the people that maybe weren't as aligned, but I spent more time and more commitment to connecting with the people who I felt were my core group. And so I think that it's we have to um there has to be intention and there's effort. It takes effort to maintain any relationship. And um I think it also requires you to be constantly vigilant about being yourself because it it's easy to slip away from that. And I'm kind of a natural entertainer, so it's a little bit easy for me to just, you know, have people over and keep it going that way. But um I I still long for bigger, more deeper. And I I think that's you know, kind of the way we're we're moving as we move into a unified, unified state.
SPEAKER_02Are there rituals, check-ins, or activities that you prioritize? And how do you keep those connections strong when life gets busy?
SPEAKER_01I think that when life gets busy is the time to really hone in on the connections because, like um Ashley was saying, the the it's often the difficult times when we need to lean on our our community more. And so um I I think probably making food for people is a ritual for me. Um serving people uh is is is one of my main ways, but I also love a good craft night and like you know, uh would love to have people come over and do some dancing. And so, you know, I think it's just it lead with your joy. What makes you happy and what make you know that's gonna make other people happy when you draw them into your happy sphere?
SPEAKER_02Um, I was smiling because I made tonight the smashed potatoes that you've made for me recently, and you know it was a hit. Everybody love everyone wanted them, they were asking for them, and I made the pesto sauce that went on it, the vegan pesto sauce as well. So I'm just smiling. Yes, you absolutely um have this connection with food, and it's so it's a way of um you know, building those connections with people for sure. You could feel the love in the food that you make. Um, Ashley, can you share a time when connection or community made a significant difference in your life, either personally or professionally?
SPEAKER_03Okay. Um, yes, I will I will answer that question. Um I think there's good and there's good, well, let's say this better. I think that there are lessons to be learned in any type of community gathering. And so for me, you know, the sweep can come from the experience of the bitter, and I've had both uh in community. I've had um I've had experiences in community that have been so focused on separating from collective consciousness uh and almost becoming cult-like in the way that they've moved about the world and and moved in in thought and feeling and being, that at some point you start to realize this feels very separate, that this world that we're this this collective consciousness that we're trying to save, we've somehow drifted so far apart that we've become almost like our own planet and our own energy that is not making an impact on the larger collective consciousness. And so for me, that sort of separation that can sometimes happen where you know you talked about it, Cerise, is that it's good to be surrounded by maybe people don't who don't fully think the same way that you do, um, because you can learn a lot about yourself and and there's value in that type of community too, um, as well as moments of value when you align, like to your point, Kay, with with aligning with pottery individuals who do pottery and work with clay. It's like there's a knowledge and a skill set that's there. But I think kind of finding that that balance, that that lemnus gate of not going too far in one direction or too far in the other. Um, community really allows for you to kind of find that. And so that's for me how you kind of make the the lemonade out of experience out of lemony sour experiences. And then on the plus side, it's such a profound and beautiful experience to witness human growth, both in yourself and others. I find that in community, one of the gifts I think of community is learning how to actively listen, to actively experience another human's journey and to um and to allow for that play in exchange, and whether it's energy exchange or food exchange or um dance exchange, like whatever the thing is, um I think there's something really beautiful about that space of of speaking and listening or uh responding and engaging.
SPEAKER_02So just um adding a question on from you know the the the bitter sweet to get to the sweet, you know, and the experiences that you learned from the prior connections and community that made a difference in your life, how has that influenced your future choices as you think about connection and community?
SPEAKER_03Ooh, um that's such a great question. Um, for for me, you know, learning from the from that bitter experience of overtly following particular um constructs without without questioning and almost like a a demand for um for a commitment to certain ideologies. I I learned what it looks like to groom, to groom a community into acting, behaving and and being a certain way. And so because of that lesson, I've learned number one, how to not repeat it, but number two, how to call it out when it's happening to avoid um uh like a perpetuation, is that the word? Like like to continue that habit of going. So so for me, I'm very, very, very much aware when I'm in a community about any type of activities that uh could be perceived as grooming a particular way of being. And I know that grooming can be a triggering word, but it's how it's the only word I can think of that you kind of watch this very subtle manipulation. You know, manipulation, no cult starts with the intention of being a cult, it it becomes a cult over time. It's when pure intention gets distorted on the path. And so I've I'm gifted with that opportunity to see when those types of things are happening.
SPEAKER_02Thank you. Um Linda, can you share if there's ever been a time that you felt disconnected or without community? And if so, how did you navigate that season?
SPEAKER_04Um, yeah, I had, and I think I had an experience that I think many people can relate to. I was the caregiver for my mother for nine years. And I was down the rabbit hole, and you know, I was in New Jersey taking care of her, and my community was not in New Jersey at the time, and I was so busy with her that I really could not participate um in any community at all on any level because I was just so busy. So um I think that was very hard because at the time I didn't really have, I didn't have a community of caregivers to understand what I was going through and how to navigate it. So it was a very solitary time, and it was really like a dark night of the soul for me because I was without community, and I was um in the unknown, and it was a very difficult unknown. So um what I think happens when you're in that kind of position is you begin to create the community of one. You begin to go deeper into your own experience and find you know connections in yourself because you have to. You have to go in and you have to find ways of doing things that you don't really know how to do. You have to learn how to navigate emotions that you don't you've never had before. So I think um, you know, community goes internally as well as externally. And in fact, I think I you know the more work you do on your personal community and your own tending your own garden inside of you, the better you are able to participate in any kind of external community. So I think um, you know, I think I probably had those kinds of times, you know, throughout my life when I was young. Um I like Ashley said, you know, I was sort of a loner. So I didn't really have community to speak to because I was having experiences, spiritual experiences, mystical experiences that no one else was having. And I learned not to talk about it. So that again, it was a time of cultivating that that inner community. So I think I probably hit that throughout different times in my life in different ways. But they uh when I look back now, I look, they were there to help me go deeper into myself and um cultivate what was in there so that I had more to offer when I when I came out of the experience.
SPEAKER_02Well, I think it's important. Um, and thank you for you know sharing and and being vulnerable in your share, um, the importance for people to understand that you know being alone is okay too, and cultivating that oneness in yourself.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, you you you're not necessarily lonely. Like I was not lonely, so to speak, but I was um I was alone in the experience. So I think if I hadn't had a connection to myself that I could fall back on, I probably would have been lonely because I would have had no one to speak to, and I wouldn't, I didn't know how to speak to myself, I didn't know how to activate that part of me. But luckily I did know how to activate that part of me, and it was still very difficult. But but um it it helped me when I came out of it be able to support others that were going through um that experience. And um and I'm happy to be able to do that because I didn't have it when I was going through it. So anytime I have a friend going through right now who has um who's dealing with um her family and her her her parents, and she's walking into the jungle, not really knowing what to expect, and I'm and I'm able to kind of be her community through it. And so at least when you go through something like that, you're able to bring it out and and do something meaningful with it.
SPEAKER_02I'm glad you mentioned that because I wanted to ask you. My next question is you know, when you went through that experience yourself, what helped you to re-engage and were there lessons that you carry forward from that time?
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I mean, I think the one thing that I learned was the the level of resilience I had. Um, you don't really know how resilient you are until you're put in a position to have to go through something that you didn't expect to go through and that is profoundly difficult. So I think you know, I learned a lot about myself during that time. And I think I became more compassionate, even though I was already compassionate and empathic, but I became more of that and I became um more understanding of people's fears and worries and stories. I mean, I think we we talk about stories in a very negative way now, but I think stories are important. So if you've gone through something, you you need to talk about it. Um a lot of people, when you start talking about it, go, oh, that's just a story you have. Well, yeah, it's a story I have, but it was a story that I experienced, and I need to talk about it to get it out. And I think that's what community helps you do. So, you know, once I came out and I was able to speak about it, it helped diffuse um the experience I have. And and um, and that's what I, you know, I I hope to be able to bring to other people that um in whatever community I'm in is is the wisdom that I gained during those those periods of time.
SPEAKER_02Thank you. Um Yeah, and my experience too it with the wellness center is that people do need people come in and it's not even necessarily that they want a service, it's that they want to talk, they want to share. They um so I think there's definitely a a huge need for that. Um, the stories that you're talking about and being witnessed.
SPEAKER_04Well, that's why AI is exploding. People aren't using it to make marketing plans, they're using it to speak to because they have no one to talk to, because they don't have community that they can be vulnerable with. And I think that took a lot of people by surprise, just how important AI became to people. And I think that's because they don't have community.
SPEAKER_02Yes, very true. Um, okay, uh, what do you think are the biggest barriers that prevent people from feeling truly connected today?
SPEAKER_01Well, um, I would say uh the primary one is probably. A lack of acceptance of themselves. Um that'll if we're not fully accepting of who we are, it makes it difficult to share ourselves with other people. So we tend to pull back and just be on our own sometimes. And um I think that there are, I mean, technology can work both ways, right? It can, you know, we saw during the um the lockdown that we were forced into technological relationships. And I think that that it had both it had a silver lining. It connected us so strongly in so many ways because we were in need of each other. And um the downside is that the technology gives us access to so many distractions and also has proven to be uh intentionally divisive, keeping us um from not connecting with each other. So um I think that those two, the combination of those two are probably strongly related to our inability to connect. And I think that we we aren't really taught how to approach community, how to um how to build a foundation of trust and value. You know, we're kind of taught to look at surface level things like how a person looks or what they're doing and connecting that way. And so we kind of have to relearn this whole community thing. And I think it's so important right now because if if we are truly moving toward unity consciousness, it's going to be a skill that we need on a practical level, on a on a human level. And so um, I think the the primary work is really getting to know yourself, what's important to you, uh, accepting yourself, loving yourself, uh, knowing your value, and then you you know you know what you have to offer.
SPEAKER_02Thank you. You answered my follow-up question. What was that? Well, to give you know ways of overcoming and just answering.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, you know, um I've been thinking about that because being in in two different locations um kind of has has made me aware of I have you know spend most of my time in Arizona and I feel very connected to my community there, less so here um in Michigan. And so um, you know, there's a this there's a huge level of vulnerability that we have to accept in order to connect with people because it's a risk of rejection, it's a risk of being seen, you know, for the the positive and the negative. And um so I think that we kind of need to approach the the formation of communities a little bit differently and think about what is the deepest, most human part of yourself, and then seek the um the understanding of the deepest parts of other people, you know, go right for it, don't mess around with, you know, what grocery store do you shop at? And like, oh, you know, like ask them like what they're longing for, you know, really don't be afraid to ask people these deep questions. And you may find that somebody you never expected is gonna be your um your community.
SPEAKER_02Great words of wisdom. Um I have uh one last question for each of you, uh, different questions um before we close out. Um Linda, why do you think connection and community are so vital for individual well-being and collective growth?
SPEAKER_04Um, well, because we're all one. We are energetically connected. Um we are part of one giant being. So when we connect to each other, we sort of remember that. Um and I I don't I think we we can remember ourselves in in community, I think sometimes better than we can remember who we are when we're alone, because you know, we are what we are a lot of what people see us as. Um, we have to spend that time alone so that we know what that inner residence signature is, that one note that's us alone. But everything else than that is are basically angles of identity that comes to us from other people. So the more people that we are able to, I mean, and this is just not in community beat, I think in general, the more people and the more different kinds of people that we have in our lives that see us differently, um, I think the better, you know, the better it is for building that sense of community. Um, you know, not just not just the the the community that is important to us, but that larger sense of community of that planetary community. Um yeah, I think great.
SPEAKER_02Well thank you. Um Ashley, if someone is feeling isolated or unsure where to start, what is one practical step they can take today to find connection?
SPEAKER_03Such a good question. Um, there's a part of me that things start simple, go to go to the coffee shop and say hello to the barista. Thank them for their work for the work that they're doing, like a simple act of service. Um, you know, just allowing for that energetic reciprocity to exist. Um, so to me, like if you are feeling isolated, sometimes just that invitation to go outside, smile at a stranger and just let like take that teeny tiny step, that teeny tiny baby step of like just feeling energetic exchange. Um it can be really hard to think the next step is to make a phone call or to reach out to a friend. Sometimes even that is really difficult. Sometimes it's easier to reach out to to a stranger because there's no expectation really of what may or may not happen after that. So that would be my feeling uh is like Goldilocks your way into making that call to reach out to a friend. Just go outside and smile at a stranger.
SPEAKER_02Wow, that's beautiful. Thank you. Uh and Kay, what's one intention or vision you hold for the future of community in your own life or in the world?
SPEAKER_01Wow. I think that the the vision that I hold for myself and the world is one of great curiosity and getting to know uh who's around me and who's in my family, my family of humanity. And when Ashley was talking, I was thinking about uh my the uh neighborhood where I raised my children. I lived there for, I don't know, 20 years or 25 years, something like that. And for almost all of that time, I had the same mailman and his name was Mike. And I I cared about Mike because I knew him as my mailman. And I think sometimes life, because it's difficult and challenging, it hardens us against our desire to care for people, to be curious about people, what's going on in their lives, and to I think that we need to remember to care about each other, about what is most essentially human in each of us, which is our desire to be seen, to be accepted, to be loved, to love. So I think it's just a constant reminder to let go of the walls that are separating you from other people. And it doesn't mean that, you know, because I didn't have Mike over for dinner and he didn't have me over for dinner, but we cared about each other. And that is sufficient. You don't have to have not everybody's in your little, you know, your little pod. You can you can have relationships with people. I mean, this seems obvious, but I think that if we I think we've fallen away from it a little bit, and I think that's been somewhat intentional, so that we we can't we can't join and so in our energies don't join together and we can't create the world that we that we want together. So I think it's just easing, being more easeful and more loving toward each other.
SPEAKER_02Wow, I love that. Thank you. I know um for me personally, um I'm I'm part of a few different communities, and in one of the communities, people have shared how they feel um disconnected and that they they want community, but then when we organize, you know, a Zoom reunion once a month, they don't prioritize it. And so then they are constantly talking about how you know they don't have community, but they're also not taking the steps that are necessary to join the community. So I guess um, you know, one thing I just want to say is, you know, if you're invited and you feel called to join the community, you know, start prioritizing it because I do believe that it's gonna be so important in the future and in the near future, you know, that we have these strong communities um built. Uh so I do want to thank, you know, Kay for organizing this and Linda and Ashley for joining and talking and being transparent and vulnerable in the conversation about connection and community and talking about the importance uh of connection community, the challenges and vision. So thank you everybody and have a good night.