Who Checks on the Strong Person?

Who checks on the person everybody else depends on?

In this episode of Prayers & Blessings: The Podcast, Mark Tyson speaks about the emotional weight carried by people who are always expected to be strong. They encourage everyone else, solve problems, provide support, and keep moving—but rarely does anyone stop and ask how they’re really doing.

Strength does not mean you never get tired. It does not mean you never hurt, grieve, or need someone beside you. Sometimes the strongest person in the room is silently carrying the heaviest burden.

This episode is a reminder to check on the people who always seem okay—and permission for strong people to admit when they are not.

Faith. Flavor. Focus. Feed the soul.

Hosted by Mark Tyson
 Prayers & Blessings: The Podcast

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“Discipline obtains excellence. Stay faithful. Stay focused. Stay developing.”  

Transcript

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SPEAKER_00 0:00

What's up with the what's ups? Welcome back to another episode of Prayers and Blessing the Podcast. With Faith Flavor and Focus Feeds the Soul. I'm your host, Mark Tyson. How is everybody doing this evening? Today I got a great topic I'm gonna go over with you guys. But before we get the show started, before we begin, let's pray over this episode. Heavenly Father, we thank you for another beautiful day, another music, another amazing topic, another opportunity to touch someone out there. Faith, flavor, and focus feeds the soul. We have faith. We speak with flavor, and we're gonna feed someone's soul with the message today. We ask that you anoint my tongue, anoint the word, anoint the message, and anoint their ears and their hearts. That they receive this. In your name's sake, we pray. Amen. Today's topic is who checks on the strong person? Who checks on the person that's strong? Who motivates the motivator? Are you the strong person? Are you that one that's always there for someone to talk to? Are you always there for the advice? Are you always there because someone wants to borrow money? Are you always there to uplift someone? Who is uplifting you? Today's conversation is for the person that everybody's considering strong. The person that everybody's called when they need advice, encouragement, money, help. Somebody to solve a problem. But I got a question. Who was checking on the strong person? Today is a it's a it's been a long week for me, right? And I think that it's gonna be a long month for me. I'm gonna try to get through this without uh being being the strong person that I am. August 29th is coming up. And August 29th is the date that I lost my uncle. The day I lost my best friend. The later, the day, the date that I lost my heart and soul, man. And um It's been it's been rough. I don't think that I'm I don't I didn't I didn't think that I would make it this far without him. Um the grieving situation, um, I've lost other people in my in my past, but I've never grieved or hurt this bad before, right? And um, I understand it, it comes with life, you know. But uh to me he was my my my the lead role in the movie. You know what I'm saying? He was the he was the star. You know what I mean? Because it was at a point in time where when I was doing wrong, he was riding with me. When he seen I wanted to change my life, he would ride with me. He's very intellectual, very understanding was the person I go to and talk to. And nowadays it's like I'm figuring things out on my own without without having my my right-hand man to call and be like, yo, this is what's going on, how you feel about the situation. So, you know, I I missed that strong person in my life. You know what I'm saying? It was times that I cried to him because I didn't think I didn't think I could have kids. Our relationship was so so intimate and so tight, and it was just, it was, it was to me, it was like no other relationship that I ever had with anyone, you know what I mean? And I honestly it took for him to leave me for me to for me to realize how how tight our relationship was. You know what I mean? And I kicked myself in the I kicked myself in the butt a lot because I felt like, you know, um I could have been more supportive, I've been more there for them in his time of pain. But I um I think I didn't want to face it, I didn't want to realize it. I didn't want to grasp the fact that I knew I felt like I he was gonna come up out of this, he was gonna pull through this, it was it was just something regular, but I honestly in the back of my mind I knew that it was coming, but I just didn't want to face it. You know what I'm saying? Um his absence has changed my support system in a way where it's though, like when I go through things, and I know that, and I know that I'm doing something out of pocket, or I know something ain't right, I can go to him and I know he's gonna put the confirmation on it. You already know you was wrong, or you already know you was right, or you already know what you needed to do. You know what I'm saying? But uh, it's left me in a place where I gotta be the big homie. And there's some things that's going on in my life right now, as far as my family's concerned, is I don't think that he would be proud of it. Not proud. I mean, he wouldn't, he would still let me be me, but he probably would let it just play itself out until work and things worked out. You know what I'm saying? So in that in that sense, what I'm going through, I would be able to go talk to him. Like, look, this is what's going on, this is what happened, you know what I mean? And he would give me his side of it, you know, not being biased, because if I'm out of pocket, he's gonna say you out of pocket, you know what I mean. But at the same time, he ain't gonna let me beat myself up and drag myself to mud for something that, you know, it was it was an even playing field. So as the 29th of August is approaching slowly but surely, you know what I mean. I think I'm handling it a little bit better, you know. I think I hand I think I handled it a little bit better. I think that's how it got me to this to this conversation, to this topic. You know what I'm saying? Um, if he was here right now, um some of the things I wish I could tell him, uh, one of the things I wish I could just tell him is like he was right. He was right. When I say he was right, it meaning like he used to be like, yo, stop, stop worried about certain things. You got bigger fish to fry. And you're gonna be alright. You know what I'm saying? And I wish that he could just see me speaking on these stages now. And um, because it's a big turnaround for me and for him to be able to see it, you know, just be able to sit down and talk to him about how he feels about my change and you know the how he how he would see the direction that I'm going on. At least I know that he wouldn't be worried about me out here running the streets and throwing all the nonsense that I was in, you know what I'm saying? Um I did tell him on his deathbed that I'll make sure I take care of his nephews. But uh back to the strong people. Strong people becomes everybody's safe place, you know? You know people bring their problems to the strong person. They trust them. You know, you become everybody's safe place. You know, you gotta you gotta walk around pretending everything is okay. Uh I think some people can confuse strength with the absence of pain. Strength doesn't mean that I don't hurt. Strength doesn't strift means I've learned to function while I'm hurting. You know what I'm saying? Uh and I think it it it it it makes it makes a man, you know, um stronger so that he can be there for the for others. You know what I'm saying? It makes you be able to look at life differently so that you can function and be the support that people need you to be. Um people don't check on us because that's the way we train them. You know, we train people how to teach, we train people how to treat us. You know what I'm saying? We train people to what we will accept and what we don't accept, uh how we move through life and how they have to handle us and how they can't handle us and what we're willing to accept and what we're not willing to accept. And I think that's where it comes in, where people look at our strengths and think that we just all have it figured out. They feel like that we we we never need anything. We we always got it um, we always got it in the bag. So I think it's strong people too. Sometimes we don't tell people what we need. So when we don't tell people what we need and they don't give us what we need, we get upset. Because we feel like that we should get treated. Um we should get treated the way we treat you. If we put if we put things out, we feel like they should come back the same way we put it out. And when it don't come back that way, it gives a perspective on who you are as a person. It don't stop us from being strong. We just have a tendency to, you know, move different. You know what I'm saying? Um, and I know it's some strong people out there that just don't allow people to help them. I don't think it's I don't think it's that's a it's um negative way they move. They've just been living like that for so long, they just don't let people in to help them. You know, they feel like they, I got it, they got it on my I got this. And then some people could take that as a form of you think you know it all, you think you got it all, or this right there, but it's just that you've been building that status in your life for so long, that that's just who that's just that's the person you're becoming. That's just who you become, simple as that. I've never experienced this, but maybe, maybe it have, but have you ever experienced that your phone only ring when somebody calling to make a request? Has anybody ever just called you naturally just to see how you're doing? The reason why I say I can't really ex- I can't really say I experienced this because my circle is so small. I don't really have that many people that you know that I really rock with. And um those that I do, I probably call and check on them. But do you have that? Do you have people that just call you all the time when they make a request for something? Like, do people call you honestly and be like, How you doing? How you feeling today? What's up with you? I ain't want nothing to just call to see how you was doing. You know what I mean? Strong people don't have the permission to take a rest. You know what I'm saying? They they feel like they gotta get permission from somebody that that's looking up to them or coming to them for advice to take a rest. You know what I'm saying? By their actions. Can I fall back and I'll put my feet up now? You hear from a week later, two weeks later, they'll tell you about something they went through, that was their way of giving you a rest because they took it to somebody else. I think in in life, right, even when you're a strong individual, you need space for yourself. You gotta feel you have to create space for yourself so that you can feel human. Me personally, I go get a facial, I go to the massage product, I get my feet done, I'll be chilling, and I just sit there because those are the times that I feel my my most peaceful. You know what I'm saying? I told my wife, babe, I'm going to the sauna. I go sit in there all day. Go from the hot, went to the cold, went to the, I'm going to spy land, I be back. And I go sit in there and just chill, just relax, you know, just reflect. Just take my time to just re-energize and come right back out, ready to, you know, face whatever it is in front of me. As me being a strong individual, right? And I carry it very well, that doesn't mean things don't get heavy. And I think I think the strong individual, and it's not just meant for a man. This is men and women. Men and women, people there are some people in their family are the big mamas of the family or the big aunties of the family. You know what I'm saying? And they gotta carry everything. They gotta answer that phone at two, three, four o'clock in the morning. And they worried if it's if it's somebody that, you know, one of their family members into something, they gotta be there for them. Cause they know they ain't running the streets. They know they chilling, they know they landing their bed, they safe, they peace. But when that phone rings, they gotta answer that phone. Cause they the strength. I wonder if is it okay for a strong person to tell you the truth? Can a strong person honestly tell you how they feel and you receive it? Well, the people that they the people that need a strong individual or trust in a strong individual, confide in a strong individual, if you was to if they was to tell you exactly how they feel in the moment that they need some they need some space, how would they how would that be how would it be received? Would it be received the correct way? Or would someone on the outside take it as they not there for them? I'm I'm in a I'm in a strength mode. I'm I enjoy being I enjoy being a strength. Um I like being I like being counted on someone that you can call on. You know what I'm saying? But I do have honestly, I'm just being honest, I do have my picks. Because there's some people who look at you as a doormat, right? And when I say when I say look at you as a doormat, because from a male perspective, right? Let's just say you always feel like you gotta take the high role, right? You the you the bigger person. You know what I mean? I'm gonna be the bigger person. Go ahead, I'll take it to blame. I'm gonna be the bigger person, I'm gonna be the bigger person. After you be the bigger person so many times, now they're just wiping their feet on you. You know what I'm saying? If someone is not respecting you for being a bigger person, now they're just wiping their feet on you. Because you go through something, they say what they want to say about you, you be there for them, you strength, you're there for them when they need you. Uh my car insurance, you got a couple dollars. My cell phone, you got a couple dollars. Can you come pick me up? You got a couple dollars. I need to ride from here to there. You think you could come get me from down here, take me over there? Yo, uh, I need to borrow this. You there for them, right? But then when some things go awry, you separate yourself from the other men, right? It dies down. You're like, you know what? It's died down, it's family, we can't ride like that. And they come back and they do it again. This is there's no respect there, they're wiping your feet on you. So as a being a strong individual, you have to put some type of margin there. You gotta put some type of some type of barrier. You know what I mean. I just want some y'all have to y'all need to check on y'all strong people, man. You got some strong people in your family need to be checked on. Seriously. They human, just like you. And there's nothing wrong with checking on them. I got a question. Are you everybody's life? And when was the last time somebody genuinely checked on you? As August 29th approach, I'm reminded that strength and pain can exist in the same person. I miss my home when I still keep moving and I'm encouraging somebody else. So they can still keep moving. Same time I encourage myself. I just haven't this because I just feel like a strong person needs to be checked on. You know what I'm saying? Check on your father, check on your mother, check on the provider, check on the leader, check on a friend. You know what I'm saying? Somebody that always answers. You know what I'm saying? That person is somebody, that person that we believe always has it together. Call them and check on them, man. There's nothing wrong with that. They call them a check on you. It's gonna be a. I'm about to put that in the atmosphere, and I don't even know that to be true. You know why I don't know that to be true? Because it's not like I've been through this before and I know what's gonna happen. I probably see if we can make it through this drink. I'm thinking about throwing a barbecue, releasing some balloons for them, you know what I'm saying? And uh, you know, say a prayer. I mean, I'm already heavily prayed up, but another prayer, man, that I could just keep, you know, my shoulders just keep getting stronger. Because we ain't praying for lighter loads, we pray for stronger shoulders. And um, man, just keep on making the big homie uh uh proud. You know what I'm saying? Just make it, just make, just make my own uncle proud every day that you know I push forward, man. If you're a strong individual out there, just know that um I'm praying for you. And uh if you need to be checked on, man, put your information in the in the in the in the comments, man. I'll take I'll I'll check when you're ready now and then. If y'all have been enjoying my podcast, keep tuning in. Um anything y'all want me to talk about, any topics. I'm thinking about having some guests coming on here in the next week. Some some females sit down and talk about some things. But remember, I'm on Spotify, I'm on I'm on Apple Music, I'm on iHeartRadio, uh YouTube, the community is growing. I think everybody that can that always tuning in consistently. I think to my TikTok followers that's always tapping in. I thanks to my uh to the homie Mick who created my my song for me, for my intro. That shows us people that you know believe in what I got going on and support what I have going on, and uh it's only gonna get better. But to the people out there that's strong, continue to stay strong, continue to be the foundation of your family or your friends, you know what I'm saying? True indeed. Uh strong people need somebody to talk to too, right? But God gave the, you know what I'm saying, gave it to us. God is the reason why we get the hardest battles, man, because we the strongest soldiers. We we we there for we there for our folks, and we're gonna fight through it at all times. And I'm here for you. You know what I mean? Prayers and blessings to podcasts. Just be, I ain't going nowhere. I'm gonna be here. As long as I can push that button, there's blood in my veins, you know what I mean? And it's breath in my lungs, prayers and blessings the podcast. I ain't going nowhere. It's therapeutic to me. I learned from uh different avenues I'm going down. I got a new speaking engagement coming up. Thankful. You know what I mean? Big homie has blessed me again from the last speaking engagement. Someone seen me, and I have another speaking engagement. So, you know, for those who behind behind the screen that watch and don't hit the like and don't support me, it's okay. I ain't tripping about none of that. Cause I ain't doing it for you anyway. So, I want everybody to stay prayed up and uh hug somebody and tell them you love them. They just might hug you back and tell you they love you. I'm just saying. Holl at your boy.