Episode 7 - Being Disciplined as a Writer

Recorded September 12th, 2022

In the updates of this episode, I talk about how my crazy writing routine is too much and what I plan to do about it (I’m not sure that’s the best idea, but I’m rolling with it right now!) And the topic part of the episode is about writing discipline: what it is, what it’s not, and how you can build it over time. I also talk about the two books that helped me so much to build my own discipline as a writer.

Mentioned in this episode:

• Follow me on Instagram
• Horror Writers Association Mentoring Program
• Stephanie Ellis
• Support the podcast on Ko-Fi
• Steven Pressfield’s The War of Art
• Steven Pressfield’s Turning Pro

Support the show (and my writing career!): https://ko-fi.com/leftieaube

Tag me on your screenshots of the show @leftieaube and follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/leftieaube/

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When you buy a book from this page, you are supporting an indie bookstore, the author of the book AND me, all at the same time!

Try out Scrivener (my favorite writing tool ever, the one I use to write all my novels!): https://www.literatureandlatte.com/scrivener-affiliate.html?fpr=leftie68

This podcast is recorded and edited using Descript: https://www.descript.com?lmref=V_4suQ

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Intro music credit: “Cinematic Cello Arpeggio Trailer” by Gregor Quendel, found on Free Sound https://freesound.org/s/555995/

Disclaimer: Some of the above links are affiliates. At no extra cost to you, I’m receiving compensation for any purchase made through those links. Buying through those links supports my writing journey, which I highly appreciate!

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Leftyobase Writing Podcast, where I share with vulnerability and positivity my journey towards making all of my writing dreams come true. I hope you learn with me as I go from the things that go well and what doesn't go so well. But mainly I wish it inspires you to pursue your own writing dreams. Now let's begin. Hello writers, thank you so much for being here with me again this week. Sorry for being away last week. I had a very busy week because I was going away on a little vacation alone with my brother without the kids. So it was a short and busy week. Uh, but I'm back today. And uh the topic for today is going to be being disciplined as a writer. So I decided to do an episode on this topic based on a discussion I had with a childhood friend of mine, uh Vevenique. She was such a great friend of mine when we were kids, and I always and she always had a special place in my heart. But you know, through the years we had just tripped it apart. But because of the podcast, we started talking again a little bit on Instagram. So if you're not following me on Instagram, you can follow me there. I'm pretty active. I really enjoy connecting with other writers on Instagram. Uh so anyway, we have been talking on Instagram, and uh she was telling me that she enjoyed the podcast, which I'm so grateful for that she took the time to let me know that she enjoyed the podcast, and she said, Um, you know, you're so disciplined. I hope you'll do an episode about this topic at some point. And I said, Yeah, that would that would be cool, and that got me thinking that at the beginning I really wasn't as disciplined as I am right now. Uh basically, it was like the hardest thing for me for years was being disciplined with my writing, so that she just came to me and said, I wow, you're so disciplined. It was it really made me realize how far I've come. And uh yes, I guess it took someone else to tell me this to realize it. So I was like, okay, I guess I can do an episode about that. I guess I could help someone build this discipline because I didn't had it before, and yeah, I can say right now that I'm disciplined, which is really cool, and I'm really proud of myself for it. So that's going to be the topic of the episode this week. But before that, as an update, so um in the last two weeks since I last recorded, which was two Mondays ago, um, I finished chapter 5 through 8 of my R novel. So I'm doing the line editing draft, the last draft before I start touring. So I finished uh chapter 5 through 8, sent them to my mentor from the Aura Writers Association, Stephanie Ellis, and uh I've reworked them all, so they are ready. And I worked a little bit on the aura short story that I submitted before and that got rejected so far. Uh so I want to submit it to New Markets, but the maximum word count is 5,000 words, and I was over that word count, so I managed to cut 400 words from the the story in like one pass, so I was really proud of myself for doing this, and it was like kind of easy, which makes me think like it was a good idea to cut those words, uh but I still need to take away 69 words, so I still need to put in some work a little, and I also want to add a little bit to the first sentence. Um, but then I will be able to send it to a new market, which I'm pretty awful about. So we'll see. So I did a bit of work on that. Um, and also uh I shared some chapters of my novel, the first chapters of my novel with two of my writer friends that I both made on Instagram, uh, and I got their feedback, and it was such great feedback. Um, so yeah, it was great to get some new feedback from new people, and um one of those friends, she's like she's a mother too, um, and she's exactly like the reader I'm targeting with this book, and uh the fact that she enjoyed it uh and she wanted to keep on reading for me was really the sign that I can finally really believe it that this book is working, is really doing what it's supposed to be done. So now I'm going to try to remember that on my own without needing all the time to have someone tell me that it's good and that it's doing what it's supposed to do and really believe it, but yeah, it felt good to have this person who is exactly like the type of reader I'm targeting, uh, enjoying it. So so that was great. And I also did some better reading for those two friends, so that was cool too. I really enjoy doing some better reading, so um, they trusted me with their writing, and I'm really grateful for it. So that was cool too. And also I received an amazing email. So someone supported me on Ko-Fi, which I'm so grateful for. The person decided not to share their names, which is perfectly okay, by the way. If you want to support me on Ko-Fi and you prefer not having your name be public, you can absolutely do it, and I will respect your privacy. Um, and also this person did like a one-time donation of a quite good amount. Like, I was super excited when I saw the amount. Uh, so that's the fun thing about Ko-Fi. Like, if you don't want to be giving like every single month, if you don't want that kind of commitment, like you can just give a one-time uh donation, and I really really appreciate it. So uh thank you to this mystery person. And if you too want to support me on Ko-Fi, if you enjoy this podcast, if you enjoy following me on Instagram and you want to support me as I'm trying to make this writing thing work full-time, uh, a way that you can do that is to support me financially to ProFi. So the link will be in my show notes. But thank you, thank you, thank you so much to this mystery person who decided to support me on ProFi. And finally, I went uh like I said before on a weekend to away with my partner. It was the first time we were without the kids in like four years, so that felt good to just reconnect as a couple, and also like it was two days of just basically not having a schedule and just going with the flow, eating when we were hungry, sleeping as much as we wanted, and just doing whatever we wanted, and that felt so good. And I and it really made me realize how much first I was sleep-defried at the moment, and also how this rigid schedule that I'm having right now, how much it's weighing on me. So, like I mentioned in the previous episode, like I was really looking forward to maybe getting the grant because it would allow me to have like more room in my schedule to accomplish all the things that come with my writing career, which I really enjoy, I really like all those things, but with the day job, like it's a lot. So, I guess in the two previous weeks, and with that week in away, I really felt it the lost of the ground, like basically that it meant that I would have to keep up this intense writing routine that I have right now for longer than I thought I would have to. Um, so that got me thinking, and again, like I was like, at some point I'm going to have the conversation with myself that this routine right now cannot keep on going, like it's not something I can sustain on the long term, it just isn't. And I was like, Okay, you will have to at some point be honest with yourself and say I cannot keep on going with this routine, but at the same time, just thinking about it, it meant that something had to go, and it was either the podcast or lots of writing time, and at this moment I'm not able to do either of those things. Uh, I already cut down on posting on Instagram, no matter how much I love it. Like, um, I was trying to post like maybe two times a week, uh, and like I'm not going to hold myself to that at all right now. Like, if I feel like it, if I have the space for it, I will do a post, but yeah, I just I just cannot keep that schedule. So, yeah, the other way of getting more sleep, being more balanced in my routine would be to not get up at 4 a.m. anymore to write and to not do the podcast in the evening so that I could have more time to do other things like sleep and walk and read and all those things. Um, but I just couldn't like just thinking about it, I was like, no, I don't want to cut down the podcast, I love doing the podcast, uh, and I don't want to cut down on my writing time because this project, this novel is super important to me, and I'm so close to the end. I want to give it my all. Like, I really want to do it. So, what I came down to was that I would push up until I finish this novel. Uh, I know that I have just a couple of months of work left. I will keep this routine, I will keep on doing it until the moment when the novel is done and I can start querying, and then I'll reassess my writing routine and find a way to incorporate more sleep and incorporate more time for other things that bring me a sense of balance and of self-care. Uh, but it's really important to me to give my all to this novel, and of course, there's a part of me I wish that when this novel is down, I will get an A job and a book deal with an advance that will allow me to take uh an unpaid leave from my day job that will allow me to have more space to write, that will allow me to keep on doing all of those things that I love in my writing career, like the podcast, like posting on Instagram, like writing a lot. Um, and that money will still be available for my family because you know my paycheck is necessary in this house, like I cannot just not work, like I need to work so we can pay for our house and everything. So it's not an option. But if I get a book deal with an advance that could give me a few months off of my day job with a non-paid leave, that would still give me some security, um, which is important to me too, because this writing thing is not like so secure. So um that would be awesome. But because this is also uncertain, like the agent and the book deal, I don't know if it's going to be with this novel with or with another novel. Like I know right now I'm practicing my affirmation of knowing that I will get an agent at some point, I will get a book deal at some point, but I don't know when, and that's why I need to have a writing routine that I can sustain through time, and I know that the writing I have right now is not one I can sustain, like I'm too sleep deprived, and I know that I can switch my routine, like throughout my writing journey, every time my routine has changed, my circumstances in my life have changed, I've always had to readdress my writing routine and optimize my schedule to a low optimal writing time and optimal brain power for my writing. So at some point I was riding in a bus because I had a very long commute. So I was riding in a bus and it was working great. Um, but then I moved and there was no bus, like it was way way way too long to take the bus from my day job to my home, so I had to commute in my car. But at that time I didn't have kids, so what I did is I was arriving super early at work to beat the traffic to not get stuck in traffic, and I would write at my day job before I started my day. I would basically not start my work earlier, but I would get like writing time then, and I was stuck in traffic class, so it's like it was like a win-win situation. But then I had to switch job, and then I had kids, so you know things always changed, and I always found a way to optimize my writing routine to fit with my life and to make sure that writing was there. Um that's the way of being disciplined, I guess. Uh so when I went back to work in January after my second maternity leave, um, and I was telecommuting uh all the time back then because of COVID. Waking up at 4 o'clock in the morning and writing up until 6:30 in the morning when the kids would wake up and we would start the day, that was optimal for this time, and it worked really well for a long time, but it means that I get often like six hours of sleep, six six thirty, and that's just not enough for me. Like, I need to have eight hours of sleep, so I I just I just know it. So, yeah, so that's the plan. I keep this schedule even if I don't get enough sleep up until the moment when I will finish this book, and when this book is done, we will reassess. So, um not the optimal plan, not the plan I wanted with the grand, of course. But as I'm saying this, it would have been exactly the same because with the grand, I needed to be finished with this book. So, anyway, it doesn't really change with this book, I guess. But anyway, that's the plan we're going forward to. So wish me luck until then. Um, and also I have uh a surgery coming up. Um it's a really positive surgery, but it will give me some medical pay leave afterwards, so I will be able to rest a lot. So uh uh, and it's like it's it's supposed to be at the end of the month of September. So no matter what happens, in a few weeks I'll sleep more. So that will help me to keep on going until I finish this book. But um, yeah, so that's about it with my writing updates in the last two weeks. So being disciplined as a writer. So the definition that I found that worked the best with the way I'm seeing discipline comes from the Cambridge Dictionary. So the definition in the Cambridge Dictionary is able to carefully control the way that you work, live, or behave, especially to achieve a goal. So what I loved about this definition that I did not find in other dictionaries because I had to go through a lot before I found one that worked with me, is lots of definition of discipline came with the notion of rules. And I think that imposing rules upon you anything in your writing journey is a sure way to stress you too much. So, what I liked about this definition is there was not the notion of rules, but it was carefully controlled, which I think better explains how I see discipline. And it it does also the notion of achieving a goal. So being disciplined is about working towards something. That's the way that you can be disciplined, is when you're working towards something. So, for example, if you are disciplined and you're working out, your goal will be to feel good, to be more healthy, uh, to have more energy, focusing on those goals will help you to be more disciplined along the way, and you will carefully control the way that you behave to achieve this goal of having more energy, feeling better in your body. You will achieve that by changing the way that you behave in a controlled way. So you will make sure that you put time in your training, you will do a training that you enjoy to be sure that you can keep on doing it in the long term. So that's what I love about this definition. But really, the way that I personally see discipline as a writer is to show up to your work with consistency and seeing your projects through. So that's the biggest difference that I see with before when I wasn't disciplined and now. When I wasn't disciplined, I would write a lot for a week and then I would not write for an entire month. And then I would write for two days and then not for two weeks, and then I will start a project and not finish it, and start another one and not finish it. It would be really not control, and it will not be careful in any way, like it's just all over the place, basically. But right now I'm really showing up with consistency to my writing and I'm working towards a goal. So right now the goal is to finish my novel, and that's where I'm putting my discipline towards. I'm not going to let myself get sidetracked by other projects. I know I'll get to those other projects that looks really cool right now, but I know like right now I owe it to this project of finishing it. Now, when I'm talking of consistency, that doesn't mean every day, like we hear so much. You should write every day, write every day. Consistency can look very different from one person to the other. But the way I personally see consistency is seizing the opportunity that you have to write and being sure that you've seized them. So this was look very differently from one person to the other because our routine and our lives are so different. So for some people, it can really literally mean write every day because that's the way that they will be sure to keep the ball rolling. There are some people with the streaks, I think, uh, when you check off every single day you do a chain. I did that way back when and it really helped me. Like, don't break the chain every single day. You show up to your work, even if it's just 15 minutes, at least you've shown up. Um so this could work really well for someone, but for other people with other responsibilities, or even just like some people are just not made for this. It's not that their life doesn't allow them the space to write every single day, it's just that their brain doesn't work this way, and your consistency may be writing whatever every week because your schedule is ever changing, or you just work this way. But when you look back, you've written consistently, you haven't like completely stopped on a project for two months for like no apparent reason. Like you've been able to show up like most days or a few times a week. Consistency doesn't have to be like a perfect axe on the calendar all the time. Also, consistency for you may be writing three hours a week every Friday afternoon because you're off your day job at this time, and this is the moment that you can spend on your writing. This is consistency. Uh, it can be writing all day, like for five hours every two weeks for the same reason because you have the day off. It can also be if you have a really eclectic schedule and you just have a few 10 minutes, 15 minutes there, you're seizing all those moments, but it adds up and you're still showing up with consistency to your work. So just don't put a label on what consistency needs to be. Just look back at the time that you're spending writing, and you will see if you're consistency. Or not. If you're if you keep on showing up, that means you have consistency building your writing discipline. And being disciplined doesn't mean that you hustle or you're grind or you drive yourself to burnout. It doesn't mean never resting. That's not what discipline means. You can and you absolutely should still take time off, still take time to rest through your routine, through your consistency, and you're still disciplined by doing that. It's important to have this balance. And even if I'm changing my writing routine to allow me more time to rest, more time to sleep, I will still be disciplined. I will just write less. But it doesn't mean that my discipline will go out the window. It's important to be sure that you're respecting yourself through this discipline and that it doesn't become like this. I need to host, I need to always write more and grind and always putting more time. That's not what discipline means. You can still take break. But the difference between being disciplined with your writing and not being is that when you're disciplined, you will come back to it after you're taking a break. Your break will be, if we go back to the definition in the Cambridge Dictionary, your break will be carefully controlled. It will be okay, I'm tired, I need to take a day off, I think need to take it a week off, but it will be controlled carefully to be sure that you still keep your goal in mind, but you're also respecting yourself and you're taking some time off and you're taking a break. But if you're disciplined, this break will remain controlled. When you're not disciplined, a day off can turn easily into two days off, three days off, a week off, a month off, two months off, a year off. And that's what you don't want to do if you want to keep on achieving those goals. Like if those goals are something really important to you and you really want to achieve them, again, if you don't, that's completely another another topic. But if those goals are important to you, being disciplined means that you'll come back to it. You will take the break carefully in a controlled way, and then you will come back to it. That's the big difference between being disciplined and that. And see that so far in this episode, I haven't talked about routine or making more time to write. Although I will do an episode of that because I think writing routine is super important in that especially at the beginning when we're still trying to figure out this whole writing thing, we struggle at making time for writing. And I did for so long. So I will do an episode about that. I will let you know how I was able to build my writing routine, and my writing routine helps me to be disciplined too, because when I don't feel like writing, I have such a strong writing routine that I don't even have to take the decision, okay, am I writing this morning or not? I just wake up and I do it. So writing routine is also super important, but I don't think that it really plays into being disciplined or not. You can be disciplined and not have the best routine, like it it's not mutually exclusive. I haven't talked about those things because being disciplined is a mindset, it's a way of being, not a way of doing. Being disciplined is something you work through. So it doesn't mean being hard on yourself, it doesn't mean being mean with yourself to force you to write, force you to work when you don't want to work. So instead of seeing like this part of yourself who wants to build discipline, instead of seeing it as a strict form of authority inside of yourself, you can see it as a caring figure. Like it's a part of yourself that wants you to invest in your heart who sees your writing as something important and who wants to help you to keep on showing up to this heart, to help you finish those projects so that you can share it with the world. So you can really find a way in your mind to bring yourself to be disciplined through this loving, caring part of yourself because you love writing, because you love your story and you want to finish it, and you want to share it with other people, and you're proud of what you're doing. So being disciplined is just a way to assure you that you spend time in your writing, that you will finish your projects through, and that you will be able to share them. So it doesn't have to be this mean voice. And I'm saying this because at the beginning of my writing journey, it was the mean voice, like the strict figure inside myself who pushed me to be discipline. But it was also making me feel bad anytime I wanted to take a day off. It made me feel like I was letting myself down every time I needed to spend the holidays with my family. And that's not good. Like, but the caring figure, the loving figure inside of me just wants me to do best for my stories, understands that yes, it's important to take a break, and it doesn't mean that I'm not that I'm suddenly not disciplined anymore. Um, so I think this little nuance can make like a really big difference. And also, if you think that the fact that you have a difficulty to be disciplined in your writing may come from the fact that you're unconsciously sabotaging yourself, uh, I did an episode on that. You can go back and check out episode 4 that I did on how to stop sabotaging yourself as a writer. So go listen to it, do the journaling prompt. So maybe it could come from the sphere that makes you sabotage yourself. But you know, I like to give you like little homeworks and things to do to help you integrate the topic of the week. And this week, what I'm encouraging you to do if you want to build this discipline as a writer is to go read two really small but amazing books, which are The War of Art and Turning Pro by Steven Prosfield. Because everything that I mentioned about what discipline is, what it isn't, that it's a mindset, what really helps you to integrate it all is understanding the notion of resistance and what it means to be a pro. And by the way, Stephen Prosfield, the definition of pro doesn't have anything to do with making money with your writing. It's a mindset, it's all internal, it's all a way that you see yourself and you act, so it it really goes along with everything that I've said. So in The War of Art, he talks about resistance, and basically resistance is this that you feel when you want to write. When you want to sit down, you're about to sit down, you have some time to write, and you feel this, oh, I don't want to do it. It's it's this weight, this force that makes you want to go away from the writing desk. It's this voice in yourself, in your head that will tell you to go check out Instagram before. It's this voice in your head that will tell you that oh, you should really be cleaning like the kids' clothes before. You should start a little laundry because that's useful. You know, the kids need clean clothes, but you know, your book doesn't really matter, nobody will read it anyway. That's the voice who tells you that you're too tired, you should really rest when you're not really tired. Resistance is basically this pull that you have to take the easy route, to not work on something that will give you delayed gratification. This is the essence of resistance basically. And once you have a name to put on this ugh that you're feeling, once you know that it's external to you, that it's normal, and that you can decide not to listen to the voice and say, No, look, I have 30 minutes, I'm going to write for this 30 minutes and then I will do the other thing. Or yeah, maybe I'm tired, but you know, I will try. Once you understand this force and you know that it's not something wrong with you, even more so, I think resistance is a sign that there's something really right with you and that you're wanting to work on the right thing, that you're going in the right direction. Once you understand resistance, it makes all the difference in the world. Basically, that's what happened for me. Like when I read those two books, I stopped beating myself up, basically. Like I started to put the blame where the blame was, and it was on resistance and not on me. And since that time that I read uh The War of Art, I've had on my board all the time, it's just resistance, and I still have it right now, even though I don't really need it, because frankly, I'm feeling less and less resistance as time go because I've learned not to listen to the voice of resistance, not to let myself be driven by resistance, but it still comes from time to time. I think it will always come, and I have it on my board, and I'm like, okay, right now what I'm feeling, okay, it's just resistance, and it allows me to push it aside as like unrelevant feeling. Like, by the way, I'm going to give it to you right away. The way to beat resistance, the way to beat the is basically just to do the thing that you want to do, but that you're feeling resistance to. So if you want to write, but you feel like this pull of not writing, it it's hard, you don't want to go to the page, it's it's oh anything would be better than doing the writing. The only trick is to force yourself to write for like 15 minutes. Even if it's not good, even if you write three words, just put a timer on your desk for 15 minutes, 10 minutes, and just write. Just force yourself to write. And most of the time, like nine times out of 10, when the timer finishes, you will want to keep on going and the feeling of resistance will be gone. Um, so right away, I'm giving you like the trick to beat resistance, but really like The War of Art, it's a short book, but it's really worth it, and it's a book I've come back again and again and again, and if it has always helped me. And Thirding Pro is basically just the continuation of the same sort of idea, and in it, Stephen Prosville he compares our pro thinks versus our namateur thinks, our pro act versus our namateur act to help you make the transition from amateur to pro. And there's a passage in it where he says that basically you know you're a pro because you feel so much better. It just feels so much better to be a pro because you're not fighting yourself all the time and you're doing what you really want to be doing. You're doing this thing that's so important to you, and you you're not fooling around anymore. Really, I cannot recommend those two books enough. I will put the links in the show notes of this episode. I will put the link to my bookshop org page. Uh, when you buy through this link, like it doesn't cost you more, and it supports the podcast, it supports my writing journey at the same time, and it also supports uh an indie bookstore, which is cool too. If you want to be supporting the podcast at the same time that you're getting those amazing books. Uh, so I will put the link in the show notes if you want to go and check them out. Uh, I promise you will not regret it. Those books are really amazing, and reading them along with what I've mentioned in this episode. I think if you're really struggling right now with being disciplined with your writing, I really think that all of this together, being kind with yourself, knowing that your consistency doesn't have to look like someone else's consistency, knowing that it's just about having the goal and showing up for it in a carefully controlled way. If you're doing all of this, you will turn around in a few years and you'll say, Wow, I'm missing now, just like I did. And when done right, when done by not being mean to yourself, when done by not hustling or grinding, just for the sake of it, just because you think this is the only way you're going to finish your book, which by the way, like it's not. You can finish a book by writing 10 minutes a day, like it would just be longer, but you will finish it eventually, and that's still being discipline. Um if you do all of this, like it really does feel better this way. So, um, thank you so much again for being here. I really hope that you enjoyed the episode this week. If you did, snap a screenshot of the episode and uh tag me on Instagram. I love seeing when people share the podcast. I will reshare your post and my stories. I really like to see when you're sharing the podcast. And um let me know if there is topics that you would like me to cover in the podcast as well. Um, I'm always so happy to hear from you. So I'll be back next week with another episode. But in the meantime, I'm wishing you a lovely week of writing.