Ready in Five

Episode 5 | Trolls, Astroturf & the Michael Jackson Movie: Real Talk with Korinna & Kate

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0:00 | 1:10:55

Welcome to episode five! Kate and Korinna are back 
and this week things get funny, a little bit outrageous and surprisingly moving.

Korinna got trolled this week. The crime? Chewing gum in a 
changing room filming an Instagram try on.  And once Kate stopped 
laughing, she had to confess she’s also been on the receiving end of internet 
outrage — for having Astroturf in her back garden. The trolls are truly everywhere!

Then the girls get into something a bit more serious. The UK’s upcoming ban 
on social media for under 16s. Where do they stand on it and what does it mean 
for the next generation?

And on a surprisingly emotional note, Korinna and Kate went to see the Michael Jackson 
movie and they have a lot to say. Moving, brilliant and not what they expected.

Real talk, no filter. Another week, another adventure.

SPEAKER_01

Hello and welcome to Ready in Five. I'm Karina Howie. And I'm Kate Lonsdale. And we are never Ready in Five. I was about 15 minutes late today. Although Kate, I have to congratulate myself because I was about before we came on air, I said to Kate, and I said, no, I won't tell you, wait until we're recording the pod before I tell you. I just had a shower that was actually like going in a sheep dip. I think that's my first shower. Brace yourself. I felt like I've been to a festival. I honestly think that was my first shower since maybe Friday and today's Thursday. I think it's nearly a week. I'm not exaggerating. I haven't had a minute. A minute.

SPEAKER_00

No, I could not do that because I can't function without having a shower. Even if I was doing weights or I was going for a run, I often have a shower first. And then go, yeah, I cannot, that's one thing, and I'm messy as anything in so many other areas. I can't function unless I have a shower. I couldn't have a shower in the evening and get up and work all day. It's just that I don't know. And I'm in and out. It's not like I'm in there for long. I can literally just go in and come out within seconds. But I just have to have a shower.

SPEAKER_01

Frankly, it's really gross. But and I actually have the same clothes on as well. This is really, really gross. So my friend my friend collected me to go and see the Michael Jackson movie. We'll talk about that in a minute. My friend collected me to see the Michael Jackson movie on Tuesday night, and I literally looked up at my phone and said 10 to 8, and I thought, shit, I have got to get in the car now, and I haven't even had a shower yet. It's 10, it's 10 past 8 p.m. And when I jumped to the car, put tons of perfume on, jumped in the car, and I said, I'm really sorry, Kay. I am and I I realised I was wearing the same clothes that I had been wearing when I met her on the Sunday to go to this like local duck race. I had the same clothes on, same underwear, I'd like to say to everybody. Sorry, different underwear, different underwear, different underwear for everybody. But I have this is my thing. I think I'll just walk the dog and then I'll have a shower. I'll just quickly clean, do whatever, and then I'll shower just quickly edit surreal, I'll just quickly do this, I'll quickly do this, I'll quickly do that. And that has happened to me all week. And I and then I think I'm not getting into bed with wet hair, and I it's too late to dry my hair at 2 a.m. Because Scott's asleep, so I'm not drying my hair at 2 a.m. And then I wake up in the morning and then it just rolls on, my phone pings, something happens, and it just is been rolling, rolling. And I think because I've been working from home all week and not actually filming, then no one has actually witnessed how feral, apart from my couple of my best friends and Scott, how feral I have because I haven't had to film anything. So I have literally been just getting through the day. Sometimes I looked at my ring as well, my UR ring, three uh three hours and five minutes, four hours and thirty minutes. The sleep is unreal. I can't believe I can function so well on so little sleep as well.

SPEAKER_00

No, I don't know how you can either. And if you're gonna wash your hair then, would you wash it in the evening times? You won't wash it in the mornings.

SPEAKER_01

I wash it in the morning usually because I cannot stand going to bed with wet hair, and I go to bed so late, too late to get the hair dryer up. So I wash it. Um, and and and it's been in such dreadful condition as well, my hair. You know, and you're just a little bit neglected yourself, healthcare spun out the window. I've been really neglected, and I kind of just been kind of getting through the day for a few weeks, and my hair was awful. Anyway, I've just had one of those amazing everything showers where you just have I had a detox shampoo, I did a hair mask, I did an ex body exfoliation, a scalp exfoliation, the whole the works.

SPEAKER_02

I just feel like like a new person, I would be.

SPEAKER_01

I feel like I've been baptized or something like that. All my sins have been forgiven, I have been cleansed, my soul is cleansed, and I thought I was in this sharing, I thought I honestly feel like I've been to a bloody festival. So, anyway, what a crazy week I've had, not doing anything particularly other than just keeping up with life, just stuff that life throws at you. It's unbelievable, isn't it?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I went to a festival once, Leeds Festival, I think it was, when I was younger, and on the way home, I paid to go to a travel lodge so I could have a shower because I could not stand it any longer. So I pulled my car over, paid for a night, went in, had a shower, sorted myself out, got in the car again and went back because I just physically could not drive home. But that's right, okay. I'd like to say that you were right and I'm wrong. But even in my 20s, I should have been fair by then. We had this conversation last week about me never taking my makeup off. I obviously am too controlling.

SPEAKER_01

No, I think you're right. I think that's completely felt I feel I've probably lost half a stone. This is great, I've lost half a stone in like skin cells and things like that. I mean, it's uh it felt like a cheap dip. But I did see Michael Jackson in the midst of all this. Have you seen the Michael Jackson movie?

SPEAKER_00

No, I haven't. No, I've heard about it from certain people. So what what what do you think?

SPEAKER_01

Oh, it was so good. I mean, some people said it was sad. Really sad. It's so sad. It's brilliant because well, some everyone's seen it except me and you, obviously. But yeah, everybody's seen this. My daughter is kind of my daughter does tend to get a bit obsessed with things. She has seen it. Um, this child cost me a fortune. I think she's seen about eight times or something, but that is being has been her latest obsession because he's so connected to animals, and so is she. So I when I saw the film, I thought I totally see why she's been so actually quite obsessed with it. Uh, yeah. But um, he it I people describe it as a feel-good film, and I thought, no, it's not a feel-good film. It it he was so abused by his dad, and I was sitting in the cinema and I just wanted to get out and punch the dad in the face, like, oh my gosh, it was so awful. And I knew that he was abused when he was young. Um, and I I now want to go and do a bit of a deep dive around it really. Five brothers and sisters. Well, he had the he's got lots of brothers in the Jackson Five, so he must have four brothers then, unless there was one not in the Jackson Five. The two girls, Latoya and Janet.

SPEAKER_00

And were they all abused, or was it just him?

SPEAKER_01

I don't know. I now feel like I need to do a deep dive. He was the youngest, and I I'm am I would I be right in saying he had the most talent? I don't think that's entirely true, but I do think at that time they maybe thought he was the one that that pulled them together. And he did have an incredible voice, and and it was his father, it was horrendous. And you could see the mother standing back and the fear in her eyes that she couldn't stand up for her children, probably for the fear of her own well-being, and that just all that horrible, chaotic abuse family situation stuff, and then it got into you know Michael and him and performing and everything, and you just forget how brilliant he was. And I I didn't really realise, maybe I was too young or something to realise how unique he was in his dress sense and everything. Remember, he was wearing like those like tight feminine sequin like jackets and and then those sequin almost like drama jackets, very theatrical, very childish. Yeah, um, but he didn't have a childhood, it's it's such complex, anyway. But the film was brilliant, the cinematography might have to watch that because I loved the Elton John one.

SPEAKER_00

Did you see the Elton John one? That was so good. Yeah, I absolutely loved that, and I've watched it a couple of times actually. I just yeah, and that was sad. I think and the Elvis one. See, that one surprised me. Have you seen Elvis?

SPEAKER_01

Yes, I saw the Elvis. Well, there's been a few. Are you talking about the Baz Baz Lehman? Baz Lehman, what's his name? Anyway, that one, the one that was it's going to really annoy me. I can't remember this director's name now. He did um I can't remember he's done so many incredible films.

SPEAKER_00

See, I wasn't a kid I was I wasn't a fan of Elvis. I mean, we have had music in our family. My dad played it all the time, you know. You made the selection tapes when you were younger, top 40, wasn't it, every Sunday night. Me and my brother would be there, you know, recording away the on on your deck, on your sort of tape decks, putting it in the car. I mean, my and my brother, oh my god, he has such a vast collection of vinyls, he's got the most obscure, you know. He likes he likes anything. I've been to a few jazz things with him, which are a bit wild. I think he's he's into Chinese jazz at the moment. I'm going to Ronnie Scott's with him, where we are in a couple of weeks' time. And he books these things. Chinese jazz. Yeah, I know. I know. He books these things and says, Do you want to come along? Sometimes amazing, sometimes you know, hard, two hours. Um but you sort of sit there and um and then uh yeah, so so we were well into music. Um, and I never and my dad played Elvis, and I was never really into Elvis. My brother always said to me, Oh my god, you know, you you you know, it was a pinnacle, wasn't he, for his ear and changed everything. And I wasn't sort of, but when I watched the film, it really did change my view, actually, yeah, of him. It's just in it. How you know, I think it made me appreciate at that time of when he came about how things worked so different, so different, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I know it's a long time ago now, too. It makes you and and some of these people that we were just sort of too young to see. All we saw is their performances, and they didn't really see the sort of torture, tortured souls behind it all. It was really anywhere, it makes you feel really it's just there was a real sad tinge to it for me, for sure. You think that poor boy, that little boy who didn't he didn't have a childhood at all to absolute slave labour, you and nobody would stand for that now, even just him performing like that at that level. But it's a really good film, the music was so good. I'm glad trying to see it in the cinema too, because it's one of those films that's amazing in the cinema. But right, I will put it on my list for sure. Oh, it was so good. I'm so so pleased I watched it. And also other in other news, I'm currently this is really funny, Kate. Literally, this has happened uh yesterday. I posted something on my Instagram yesterday, and it's just my usual sort of change in, you know, get changing the changing room, try a few things on because I like to pop in shops and literally grab whatever is on the hanging rail. Yeah, I think it catches my eye. Yeah, MS. Yeah, MS, I do them occasionally, and they people quite like them, I think. Um, because it's sometimes as creators we get sent a lookbook and we can get some pics that you can't necessarily get in store, blah blah blah. So I think it's really, really genuine that you can walk in the store and find it. Because not being funny, sometimes Marks and Spencer's their PR machine and their fantastic press trips to Ibithas are not actually like that when you walk in store and the ceiling is pouring in because there's like it was like and then the aircon didn't work and I was melting, and I thought they need to spend a bit more of that budget on actually looking after their customers. Exactly. But um, so I put this on there, and then in the there's not that many, it's not like a trolling situation, but there's a a large percentage of people are saying because I was chewing gum on the way to the dentist. I'd like to point out that this is very early on the week before I went completely feral. I would say I did arrive at the dentist very clean. And um when so I had I've cleaned my teeth and everything because I've got to think any kind of medical appointment. I'm gosh, if I have a smear, I'm like literally dripping wet when I'm going for smear. For you, I'm like, if I go for a smear test or anything I'm getting my body out, I am literally wet hair, like straight in. So I think these people have got to poke around in people's bodies, then the very least you can do is be squeaky clean, and I'm still the same for dentists. So, anyway, clean my teeth, went to the dentist, gum, and I was a little bit early, I thought I'll pop in an MS. So I happen to have gum in my mouth because I wanted a minty mouth for my dentist. Anyway, this is like people are losing their minds about me chewing gum, just chewing gum, just saying it's disgusting, it's gross, I can't, I can't unsee your chewing. The chewing is common. I can't see the clothes because of your chewing. Not lots of people, but sometimes you get one person who says get a haircut or something. You think to be fair, I do need a haircut, but there's a there's a good percentage, maybe five percent or something, a substantial per percentage. So here's my question to you, Kate. Okay, because I was putting the comments I'm real life on Insta, I don't kind of film, I do set things up and film them, like you know, presenting things. My stuff is totally legit. I'm like legit, I'm running past, I'm busy, I haven't had time to do my hair, I'm popping in and I'll film it. That and it's there's there's no more thought in it than that. It's totally spontaneous. And um so I thought, is this true in real life too? Is chew am I just did I not get the memo that chewing gum is really antisocial and gross? And is this just on Instagram or in real life? What do you think?

SPEAKER_00

Do you know it's funny you should say that because my mum always said to me it was common. Really? Yeah, no, my mum did. She used to say to me, Oh, don't need don't chew gum in public. It's really common. My mum used to say it, do you know? I thought it was something that generation, but you know, my mum's generation was a bit more about it than I would say the younger generation. It wouldn't bother me in the slightest. It doesn't bother me. Um so I wouldn't, but I can remember as soon as you said that, I can remember my mum saying to me, don't chew gum, it's really quite it. It's oh, do you know? Do you need to chew gum? Do you need to? I think do you need to open your mouth? Well, I was a bit maybe I'll go like that.

SPEAKER_01

You know, when you when you know you think, oh no, let me rewatch this video. I mean, is it really gross? It's not no, I wasn't kind of like um Rizzo from Greece. Yeah, and or something. And I thought, well, I'm just chewing gum and just I'm just completely natural and I don't know what not I'm just forgotten I'm filming myself, honestly. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And um, but anyway, A, I will never do it again. But I thought anyway, I just thought it is that what people think in real life? It must be a real life thing too. Anyway, I must stop, but you know, the reason I buy gum is because I you know, sometimes you are with people you think, honestly, your breath is gross. I wish you would have a mint or I wish you would have some gum. Particularly, I do find this sometimes when we hang around when we go to meetings, and that everybody now is a content creator is gonna think, have I got disgusting breath now? But when you run around and you're so busy and you don't eat, I think sometimes you you get a breath thing because you haven't eaten. I've been aware of that before. I think I'm farming a call train. I'm quite fussy about what I eat. Sometimes I'll just have a massive croissant, but sometimes I'd rather not eat ultra-processed food. So I don't eat, I think I'll get some nuts when I get there. It doesn't work, and you or you've had a really smelly lunch and you think I've really stink of garlic. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm really conscious of that because I don't like smelly breath. And I've told you before, haven't I, that I get packets of mints, but because of my the way I am, I just eat things quickly. Chocolates, anything. I just eat food, everything I eat really quickly. So if I buy a packet of mints, I will consume the whole packet of mints in a one-hour, and then I will have diarrhea or possibly almost shit to myself. Did I tell you that? You told me, yeah, yeah. Exactly. So gum is the way forward for me because I'll have two pieces, but also I'm always up to four because I just have this thing that I just shove it in my mouth. It's just my kind of slightly manic approach to life. So it actually stops me having diarrhea by using gum instead of mints, but it just made me think, gosh, I I just didn't give it a second thought. I did not give it a second thought, but it clearly is quite triggering for quite a lot of people.

SPEAKER_00

I think these I think these things that go up on wheels sometimes, it is the little things that you never think for one minute that is going to trigger everybody that actually does. You think you tick all the boxes, they can't see my pants. My black, my my underwear is white, and I've got a white because I've put things on before and I've gone in black underwear, and I've just done a try-on and I've tried something on in white, and I've had, you know, well, your underwear doesn't suit underneath it. Well no.

SPEAKER_01

But I'm just trying to let on, yeah. Yeah, but this is what we do. We're normal, real women, and we ever got the right underwear.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I think it's sometimes it's the one thing you never ever thought was going to trigger everybody that does. I mean, it wouldn't have bothered me, uh, but as I say, I can remember my mum saying, so maybe it's a generation.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I think I'll ask my mum too, then, because she that's the kind of thing my mum would say to me. All these old fashioned rules that you're trying to think about the things that your mum would say. Well, see, this is why I'm not very good at content creation, because I was always raised to not show off. I don't know if you were, and we're the we're like our job is literally showing off, really.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I mean, I'm I yeah, I'm I'm I think I'm quite an introvert, anyhow. So I struggle with Instagram and putting myself out there. It's something that I've had to really, really work on. Um, but my mum wasn't, she she was very reserved and very I think when my mum was alive, what the thing that she struggled with my Instagram more than anything else was people knowing things. My mum and dad were very much that it stayed within the four walls, especially my dad, you know. If if there was a problem, he wouldn't want anybody to know. You know, it was that sort of everything's brilliant, everything's fine, even if it's not, type of thing. So for my mum, it was very much does that need to be out there? Does that need to be out there? Do you need to, you know, even though I don't share much, yeah, but what I do share was still too much my mum felt.

SPEAKER_01

So that was you're like me as well, you don't share the half of it, do you? You're not you're not. Well, I would, but it's not about me, and it's not about yeah, that's the same as me. Yeah, too many other people's lives that you would have to spill the tea on, and it's actually really too complex, and once it's out there, you can't bring it back. So you and you and I the saying that we can't. I sometimes I think I'd love to talk about these things, but I think the other person that that's wrapped up in it all has to be on board and it has to be something. Yeah, definitely a reason for it all, really. But I don't know. I think it's you you I'd I'm happy to talk about me, I'll happily talk about anything, I'll talk about periods, or talk about whatever you want to talk about, I don't know, lube, whatever you want to talk about, but there's I can't go too crazy on it. No, no, your family stuff, whereas some people do, ooh, what about this week? What do you think about under 16s being banned from social media? What do you think about that?

SPEAKER_00

Wow, I think it's a good thing. Now I've got a feeling that you think it's not a good thing, because I think we're gonna disagree on this one, which isn't bad. I it's different for me though. I think for you, you've probably got a completely different stance on it because of your daughter. My kids are older now, and they are 24 and 22. They just my my girls aren't into Instagram, nor I don't think any of their friends are. Never went on Facebook, it was very frowned upon when they were at school. I can remember having um parents' evening and sitting in the hall and them saying we don't allow kids because at that time Facebook was a big thing, it then became Snapchat took over. Um, but it caused problems with my girls at school for the for the beginning, for the part, small part at the beginning, you know, there was pictures taken, there was a couple of girls that stupidly put pictures up, which was then screenshotted and went everywhere. We had um there was another incident as well where a chat got in into the group chat on I think it was Snapchat saying that he was a young girl and it turned out that he wasn't. That was all to do with the school as well. That got involved, they they managed to find out who it was. So and my girls, but they were at the beginning of it, and uh they were at the end of it, they were older, and so by that time I didn't really have to deal with it. But I do think I see the younger generation, I think it's for me. I spoke to my daughter about it, who's teacher, secondary school. Cool, that she wanted them all off it, yeah. Yeah, thought it was amazing that they came off of it, but she is in a very, very run-down school with a lot of issues, and she said that it takes up so much of her time sorting out, you know. One girl might say she's taken somebody else's boyfriend, she said, you know, and then all of a sudden a group of girls weighed in because she's taken this boyfriend from somebody else, and it just Gets out of hand and the bullying doesn't stop, and she goes at home and it's relentless. Yeah, and she said to me, It's so difficult to manage, and it takes up a lot of my time trying to sort out this. Where if they weren't allowed on it, I wouldn't have to deal with it. So I think if you're a parent that have got it under control, strict rules right from the start, then that's fine. But there's some children at Beth's school that Beth says hardly ever sees well, not so much this school, but she was in an inner city school for a while, and they hardly ever see their parents because mum does two jobs during the day while dad sleeps, and then when she gets in, he does shift work. So they come in from school, dad's in the house, but in bed, mum gets in, she's knackered, she cooks dinner, goes to bed, and they hardly speak to any adult. And the tablet is the babysitter, yeah, and Beth says it's it's then difficult to parent when there's jobs like that. And so I think it's so difficult, isn't it? I it it's like it's not the same for everybody. Everybody's life's different, everybody's lifestyle's different, everybody's parenting's different. So you know, if you've got control of it, then great. But if you haven't, then it's hard. So what about you?

SPEAKER_01

Well, I I think it's really toxic for young people. I think it takes their attention span away. There's all sorts of horrible self-harming, mild porn, all sorts of stuff on there. So I I really think it's been really it's it's really poor, uh, really terrible for developing minds. Absolutely 100% agree. I would have done anything to get my daughter off that when she went on there, whatever age, maybe 13, something like that. PlayStation 2, Roblox is disgusting. Roblox is VR chat, it's horrendous. My problem with it all is they're not going to be able to police it because should kids will just if you've taken my daughter off there, if I'd said to my daughter you can't, it's it's illegal at age 12, 13, they'll just get a VPN, they'll still get on it. They just go and get a VPN and go on it as as a like a nobody.

SPEAKER_00

Because how do they how do they police it in Australia?

SPEAKER_01

Is it through it?

SPEAKER_00

It doesn't work.

SPEAKER_01

Well, that's the problem, it didn't work in Australia. 70% of children are still on social media. So loads of my followers in Australia messaged me, because I've just said how I politely how I felt on my little Instagram, and loads of message people message from Australia and said it hasn't worked over here, and I think they're rolled out in Denmark too, and it didn't work there either. So there's a lot of antisocial behaviour going on in Australia because there isn't anything else for them to do. The problem is it's gone too far. It should have been nipped in the butt. So yeah, ideal world. Ideal world. What are we talking here? Is this like six years, seven years of kids being addicted to this now? Something like that, something like that, maybe more shouldn't have been nipped in the bud at that point. Yeah, and I um because I remember I remember personally refusing to go on TikTok because um, and then me and my flaky morals. Well, actually, do you know this is ridiculous? Do you know what a game changer for me was when really high profilers started going on TikTok, and one of them was Edward Eningford, currently he was cut, he was actually the editor of Vogue at the time, and he went on TikTok, and then I think it was Vogue said we have a TikTok account, and everybody moved up because it was this cheesy dance thing, childish cheesy dance thing, which is fun but silly, and then suddenly it started to get traction and then views, and as soon as there's views, well, it's bloody marketing, isn't it? So people can be on it, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then all of these kind of really big, famous, high-profile, credible people started going on, and I thought, no, don't go on there because it's it's horrific and it's horrendous. And everybody went to TikTok, and then Instagram tried to be more like TikTok, and here we go eight years later, it's all shit. None of us got no one can watch a video for more than 50 seconds. No, no, no. People might put a video on that's just having a little chat two minutes, and people write, God, you can you get on with it? And I think you haven't even got two minutes in you, no, like two minutes now, you know. But um and this hook thing, do you want to it's ridiculous? So sandwich has all been done. But I remember my daughter coming to me, and I was so cross at this TikTok thing, and parents did not know back then. Parents never know, so all the parents listening, trust me, do you really don't know what your children are doing, you just don't really know. No, no, no, no, you don't know what they're doing. Um, you know, we don't know through technology.

SPEAKER_00

We haven't every one of us who's parenting at the moment are yeah, learning from never had it.

SPEAKER_01

And they and my fear is that they won't come to you if it's banned and they're doing it in private. They're not gonna tell their parents what's going on because they'll still go on there because at this point it's it's too far, they'll find a way to get on there. But remember Lila saying to me that there's people putting TikTok videos on there from psych wards because this was a point where I wouldn't let her have her own account, but I would let her go on TikTok on my phone. That was how I managed it so that it wasn't on her device. Um, and she said there's people making TikTok videos from psych wards, this is her phrase, and I so a psych ward for me is quite an Americanism, really. So that's what tells you the sort of content, but they call them psych wards in the UK. Anyway, I said, Really, Lila? I said, I don't believe that because my dad my daughter does tell a few tall stories. I said, I I'm not sure I believe that, Lila. She said, Yeah, so anyway, she left the room. I had a quick deep dive on my phone, didn't take much of a deep dive at all. The sort of keywords were things like I feel sad and cutting and things like that. Then you had these young people, and they are actually in um units where they are um residential psychiatric units, and they were posting videos. Now, this will tell you when it was. Do you remember there was a trend where on social media people used to stand and point to things? So they'd say, I love being in Spain because and they'd point and there would be a word that said sunshine, and they'd point and it would say the sea, and they'd point and say whatever. And there was there were these young people, and that was the trend at the time, they were saying what it's like to be in a cycle, and they're pointing to the windows are locked, no hot water, no cutlery, no bins, just no electric sockets, just the things that I recognise of why they're not safe for young people who are vulnerable. But these young people had bloody bandages on their arms, across their neck, across their head, where they'd been self-harming. And I thought I couldn't believe that TikTok hadn't taken this down. And at that point, TikTok were not paying maternity leave, they were have had some put some staff, very small um amount of staff in London who I think were on something like a 16 or 18 hour day because at that point they had their so China it's a Chinese own company, they had Chinese working regs at that point, right? Yeah, um, and I just thought this whole thing is utterly horrendous. And I was quite vocal on Instagram, and literally no one cave gave two hoots about what I thought about TikTok, like no one cared, and I I you know you had to end up sort of giving in, really, because what are you gonna do? I mean, what are you really going to do? At some point, you think am I just gonna be some old fart who doesn't do any of this and says so you know, and anyway, so I did eventually go on to TikTok. I still don't like it, I still think it's full of rubbish. Oh, yeah, everything I bought on there has been a lie. I mean I've been on there, and it's actually been just a big fat lie. And because you don't know who told you to buy it, no one tells you to buy anything, but you know you don't know who said this is the best thing since sliced bread. So you bought it and it arrives in two weeks, and then you can't remember where you saw it. If I tell somebody on my Instagram something is like literally incredible, and my lovely gang go and buy that, they will come for me if it didn't work, yeah, yeah. And so they should, because they'll remember that I was the one who said it was great, and they should come for me if I was lying. And that's I think TikTok for that is just outrageous, anyway. We're just so far down the line. Here's my my golden solution for it, anyway. Not a golden solution, there's such a thing. I wish they had slapped an age 15, like serious age 15 certificate on it, like you manage children's films, because for instance, children are at home, everybody's got Netflix and Amazon Prime at home. Any child can be watching an 18 graphic horror at home. Who's policing that? Really? Yeah, I mean, yeah, no, yeah, no one is. No, no one's no one's policing what they're looking at online, no one's policing any of that. So I think, and I I have a really so I've got two kiddies, and you're a typical big boy who was like reasonably easy to raise. He had stuff going on, all kids have, but he was um he was easier to raise in that he he was easy to manage, and we could have good conversations with him. My big girl is um incredibly challenging. But what was really a great parenting tool for her was to able to be able to point to something that was very clear, a very clear rule, because then she didn't take it out on us personally. Scott and I weren't the horrible people. We could literally point and say, it's an age 15, it's a government age 15, we don't make the rules, the government made that rule. And that that was that worked so well for like worked really well with all of the movies. When she was 12, she wanted to watch graphic horror films, and if we weren't able to point to that age 18 and say, everybody else makes the rules around that for your well-being, so many different societies have watched it and put that that label on that. It's not your your dad and I being mean or being horrible, it's actually what's best for children, and it shuts down that thing that all kids do, all parents can relate to this when you think you know, you've got your kitty at school, they're in primary school or whatever, and you think no one has a PlayStation or no one's got a Nintendo Switch or whatever, and then one person, one parent buckles, one parent freaking buckles and gets the PS or gets the whatever, and then all the other parents collectively groan, like, oh, what did you do that for? In a moment of weakness, you bought it, and now the it'll just go through the class like a virus. And your child's saying, I want it, my best friend's got it, you know, Samantha's got it, Joseph's got it, everyone got it, you're horrible, you all make all of that. And when there's an age certificate on something, if there's an age 15, you can say, Well, they shouldn't have. And you're not being rude to the other parent, you're not being rude to anybody. Because my daughter, if I said to her, you shouldn't have that, my daughter is so complex, she would then go and tell the other parent's mum, my mum said you shouldn't have done that, you're a bad parent, you shouldn't have given that to your daughter, yeah. Which is why everyone hated me at the school gates. But if it was an age six fifteen, you could legit say, Do you know, Lily? No one in your class should have that. It's not a rule that you don't like.

SPEAKER_00

It would have been better for you had they said no, yeah. So what they're bringing in now.

SPEAKER_01

Well, they're doing a blanket ban, which I don't agree with because here's my I hope it's a conspiracy theory. I think it's because they want to roll out this digital ID. Because we'll all have to get a digital ID to prove that we're old enough to be on there. And I don't like the control thing.

SPEAKER_00

No, well, must admit, I don't like the control thing. I don't like the control thing. I don't know how other way they're gonna do it now because I think they should have tried it with this.

SPEAKER_01

I think they should have tried it with this ban, and then I gosh, there was a psychologist that was talking about it that was saying they didn't agree with it. I think it's really good that we can all chat about it and disagree. I think it's brilliant. We will actually probably have chats about it. This psychiatrist was saying how it just pushes conversations because apparently they can all get on it. They will they'll still find a way to go on it. 70%. Well, I'll tell you what will happen. Your um, I'll tell you exactly what's going to happen with your well, I don't know how they're going to police it, but you're talking about your daughter's a teacher, and I'll tell you what will probably happen. The mum will just give them their phone and say, You can use my phone, and they're on.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, the mum's busy, the mum's busy, all the children are crying. If you find though, that I don't know if three percent or even five percent of that class has got it, but the other five percent, uh the other percentage haven't. I still think it makes it better than everybody does. I think I don't they're not allowed, they're not gonna be allowed phones at school, which I think as you go into. They should have done that immediately. Yeah, ages. Immediately I think they have to put them in now special cases in some of them. And then they go this that and that case stops any sort of Wi-Fi or anything, and it goes into their bag. But yeah, that should have been done ages ago.

SPEAKER_01

And also my children used to message me and climbers.

SPEAKER_00

And it's strange, isn't it? How I know, I know, it's that strange, isn't it? Like how our generation, and it is our generation, and I think it's because we haven't done this, but when I think of like I used to do go out to play, and my mum used to say I have to be home at eight o'clock, and it was my responsibility to get myself home. It was my responsibility to look at my clock and to find, you know, and to be back at a certain time. And then all of a sudden, our generation, and I don't think I don't think it is any worse now than it was years ago. We talked in the last podcast about things that had happened to us when we were younger. Um, but we had this thing that we wanted to track them, we wanted to track them coming home, you know. All of a sudden, you know, it's not fair that they don't have their phones because we need to track them. And when I think about it, I'm just talking to my daughter about this the other day. You know, if a train broke down and I was in my teens and I was going to Nottingham, I would have to work out how to try and get on that train or the next train. I had to buy another ticket, I had to work out how to get back. I couldn't ring my mum up and say, I mean, you can reverse calls, but you know, you've got to go to a phone box and ring. Now, you know, they ring you up. I mean, I don't my kids are again, luckily that bit older, so they didn't have phones at the right at the very beginning. But I hear when I used to hairdress, you know, and I used to hear all these stories, the kids would ring them up. The parents would, you know, book the ticket, screenshot it, send it to them, tell them what train they need to be on. Everything was is done for them, and then no life skills whatsoever. And so all of a sudden, you know, you're you're you you don't think for yourself, you don't sort anything out, you don't. I know you don't look crap.

SPEAKER_01

That started. So both mine are really Lila's really, especially considering her what her neurodiversity, she's incredibly assertive, too, and independent, and my big boy's incredibly asser uh independent too. And I but and that comes from I was the really mean mum. You know, when they had art, you know, they had to do like make a solar system when they were like six, seven, eight, nine. Yeah, yeah. And the parents, the parents clearly helped a lot. Didn't it? I didn't help my children do anything. I didn't know. I didn't help. I didn't do it. I sat with them homework. I didn't, I'd sit with them and say, Come on, you've got to do that. You and you can can I used to thought, I used to think, and my children's all they both looked dreadful. They look, but they looked like a child had made them. And I'm sorry, so many of them are clearly made by the parents, they so were made by the parents. And it all starts from back then, but I was just I was just a bit of an old-fashioned parent.

SPEAKER_00

I used to let my kids wrap their friends' presents as well. Yeah, all of them used to see them too, mate. You can't give that another. Oh my god, it was you know, everything you might even be able to see the present at the end because it hasn't, but I would just allow them to do it. Wrap it up themselves and they would go. Yeah, um, writing cards as well, you know, it was all spelt wrong, or they, you know, that would be the same again. And I yeah, I think we're very similar in in that respect. So I would just, you know, and I think it's that maybe it's that creativeness of both of us, is that we, or maybe it's just that we don't care.

SPEAKER_01

What uh um no, I thought I think you I think your goal is to raise Sean to be independent. That that is the goal. Well, I'm really independent anyway. So, and I think that's because I I haven't got any brothers or sisters. I was raised to be really independent. And you were any child, yeah. I was raised to be really in I'm really independent. I was raised by both of my parents to work really hard, like be a grafter, look after yourself. My dad was obsessed with teaching me how to change tires on my car, how to put shelves up, how to change plug sockets, all of that to be like an independent person. And I really pushed that on my kitties too, that they they they need to be independent, it's healthy to be independent from us, and um to the point where sometimes I thought, am I a little bit mean in some ways? You know, sometimes so I would come home from school, and I always used to this is old school as well, and this doesn't happen enough now. I bet your big girl will say this, without being without being um completely ignorant, I would always side with the teachers at school. So I would come home and say, Mrs. Amos took my made me cry at lunchtime, she took my football away from me, she's a horrible, and I say, Okay, all right, honey, give them a cover and say, Can you tell me what happened before Mrs. Amos took your ball away? Because I was thinking well, why did she take your ball away? Because I bet she did it very well, she was horrible. She's mean, she went and I said, but why? And then and then it turns out that he was still the when they but after they'd blown the whistle, he was still playing football. I'm like, Well, I'm sorry it's not allowed, honey, and that's why she took your ball away.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I mean I really are I um I wasn't like that, but no, I wasn't, but do you know what? I hated school. My teachers were awful, they were. I wasn't I haven't got anything nice to say about any of them. The school that I went to at that time, it's improved no end since was shite. And I had no respect for teachers whatsoever. So by the time I left, we when I was with my husband, he went to a very, very, very good school. Um, it had boarding and they had to take the 11 plus, it was it's still quite well known now. He loved his teachers, had a fantastic time at school. So when we both went to Parents' Evening, there was me who my shackles were up before I even sat down because I just had this thing for teachers, and there was him that sat there, loved school, had full respect for teachers and everything. My girls went to a really good school. Um, there were two teachers that I had issues with during the school in time, but I was on defense as soon as I sat that down. It was never ever my girls' fault. But me and my ex-husband had a couple of rows in front of the teachers over the fact that I was having none of it. So we were, yeah, we were I was always on my girl's side, but I think it was purely down to the fact that it was just teachers. I just had this massive, I had this massive sort of thing about them, and my daughters become a teacher, ironically. Um but yeah, I had this massive thing about teachers. So if they said all of a sudden said something about one of my girls, my instant reaction would be, I don't know if I believe you or not. Really? Yeah, yeah, I was and my ex-husband would be right, yeah, okay, you know, really calm about it, really, and I think he could feel me going yeah as soon as soon as anybody said anything.

SPEAKER_01

But I think that's just down to my personal yeah, you've you've stuff from your own, yeah, your own past. Own shit. I am I am Switzerland, I am ever the diplomat. I'm like two sides to every story. You know, you have really like that. Yeah, when you have um God, you have friendship groups, you have drama in your friendship groups always, don't you? Between divorce and people split and people go their separate ways and everything. And I think within I can't within maybe a couple one or two exceptions, I'm still friends with all of the people that have all divorced and on with different people and not everything else because I can't I don't how I like I can totally see two sides to all of I can see where everyone's coming from. Unless someone is completely toxic and an absolute arsehole, then yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, you don't know, you never know in those circumstances what goes on behind closed doors. So in life, you you never know.

SPEAKER_01

And then my daughter also has um is a complete different kettle of fish. Because bless her, she does have a history of false accusations, so that's a big problem with yeah, yeah, yeah. Which is how I learned that people that young people can be so vulnerable. I hadn't really learned how I didn't understand how vulnerable people are so vulnerable, you know, young people can be so vulnerable. I didn't quite understand that if they have a history of making false accusations and really feeling like they haven't been represented or fully understood and feeling act feeling angry, if and this is repeats, history repeats itself over their whole sort of adult or young, young, um, as young people in kind of teen years, if something actually then happened to them, it wouldn't necessarily they wouldn't necessarily be believed. And I never understood that was what their true vulnerability was until I spent a lot of time, you know, with my own daughter and a lot of young people like that. And it's literally the boy a very complex you know, version of the boy that cried roof, really, and it makes them so vulnerable. Yeah, yeah, so vulnerable. Yeah, it's so so complicated. But anyway, I do think it's really, really good that young people are off um social media, but I just wish they'd just slapped an a serious age 15 on it to help parents parent.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

help teachers teach what what have they put on it six sixteen or is it fifteen it's well I think well also if it's illegal who's going who's gonna get is someone gonna get like a a fine who's gonna pay the fine no isn't what is it well I read that it was down to Instagram TikTok and in it so it will come back on them so I think they're hoping that they make it harder for 15 or 16 I can't remember what the age group is and lower to go on it so it's up to them to sort out how they're going to police this and how they're going to make it but I don't know how they're going I don't I don't know how they're gonna do it because you can get a VPN in seconds you just get you sign on so you just sign up VPN that goes straight over my head because you as you know with this it takes me at least got a set up a zoom call let alone anything else I have a master class in this because the last time my my big girlie got a new we I think we got PE she got a VR headset for Christmas and was difficult to set up because to get this she's had about um over a hundred email addresses because she is so complex and has had so many email addresses perhaps fallen out with people etc on socials um and also tried to access things that aren't appropriate for her age etc right that historically she has a lot of email addresses and because she had tried to set this VR chat headset up bang bang bang bang with about 10 different email addresses and and had done it very fast and aggressively because she was so anxious she just desperately wanted to get on it she couldn't just breathe and do it anyway I said Lila I think you just need to just step away overnight because it it literally thinks you're a bot because you're banging at it for like 10 different emails it literally doesn't think you're human at this point so we need to just call it come back and and I said why have you got about a hundred email addresses this is my daughter but what they'll do is just get a VPN which means they can sign so they can just sign on and get an email address in Belgium and then sign into Instagram and in Belgium where they don't want to see ID and they'll say they're over 18 in Belgium and then sign on and that's it boom done done I see that's about five minutes something new there because I couldn't I didn't even know where to start on something like that. And some somebody had this really important point which I thought and I'll move on from this because I know this is quite niche but then so many people are parents and it's a hot topic this week but somebody said which I thought oh I hadn't even thought about that if the if there's an under 16 ban in the UK then social media platforms have no responsibility to protect under-16s anymore. So then it can be the Wild West on there because they can say well I'm sorry I thought you told us there aren't any 16 year olds on here now. So would there then when this happens next year will there be more pornographic material more adult material because now suddenly it's assumed that no one is under 16 and so when 16 year olds do go on there because apparently in Australia 70% of them are then they're looking at extreme adult content and no one's no one's looking so it's you know it's it's just not that simple. That's why I think everyone is that simple I know everyone's celebrating and it's just not that simple. It's so I think it's a good thing.

SPEAKER_00

I think it's a good start yeah I think it was better then for it not to go for it has to happen.

SPEAKER_01

It's really toxic for young people I'll tell you what's even worse and everyone at home can listen to this is because if you're bored with me wanging on about social media VR headset right listen to this it'll blow your mind got my daughter a VR headset for Christmas reluctantly I didn't want to get once she's 16 you get you know I I'm the parent that holds off as far as like all good parents do. We got to 16 and you think look you're 16 and I went on set up with her blah blah blah so very long story short um she's got a VR headset now she got the VR headset and there's an age 18 movie she wants to see and I said you're not watching it Lila it's graphic all the conversations that we've just talked about and she accepted that um and reluctantly and Lila which is wonderful that part of her she has autism PDA if anyone knows what that is you can Google it if you know what it is but she feels the need to tell you what she's done as well which is really good because then we can support her but if Lila does something she'll tell you because she literally she wants the negative attention so she'll get a vape she would get a vape and say I've got a vape because she wants the negative attention. She won't secretly use it in the bedroom she'll tell me she's got a vape right boom no negative attention boom I'm in here kind of thing. So anyway wanted to watch this age 18 no not watching it's awful all the reasons why I'm still scared of those movies now and I'm 55 all of that stuff oh god yeah I can't watch anything like that.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah so she gets a VR headset for Christmas and um she says to me the it's like two days later whatever the film was called can't remember just say it's called like the horror film right she said um I watched that horror film I said what do you mean you've watched that horror film she said in VR world right virtual reality world she went in to like a like a meeting space got a fake ID in VR world and watched the movie in a VR cinema in the VR world on the headset and I and the first thing I thought was I said Lila I asked you um not to do that you shouldn't have done that behind my back it's an 18 and guess what my daughter this is funny my daughter is funny sort of she doesn't make me laugh or cry I said and what was it like was it scary she said and I quote no I've seen worse and thought oh my god anyway thought she's Lila anyway here's what I instantly thought Kate how many people have bought their 12 year olds VR headsets who don't know what they're doing and they're not telling their parents what they're doing so I think honestly and I've told everyone's gonna think oh my god but like TikTok and social at least it was out there at least we could all see what was happening we could have conversations about it but don't get me wrong I don't think it's good for children to be on social media I'm totally uh pro that I don't know how we're gonna police it let's see what happens let's see what happens going back to years ago when we all went to the cinema and nothing else and we couldn't have anything else I was 16 and I was going out with somebody who was 18 I think he was he was 18 I might have been 17 when he was 18. Anyhow we went he wanted to go and see Freddie Kruger I absolutely hate any films like that I mean I don't watch any horror films whatsoever anything like that I can't stand it just like plays on my mind after me too so we went queued up to get in to go you know I've obviously fancied him like anything so thought right well I'll I'll I'll see this out you know maybe maybe you know we I can uh it's obviously what he wants so we'll go with her got to pay and he and he was paying it was those days where you just you know and he went one and a half please and they went she's got to be overheated get in you type it and she he went oh and I was escorted out of the cinema the first walk of shame yeah not the first no but yeah one and a half please can you believe it did you dump him after that yeah I think we did I don't I don't think it ever I don't think it ever you probably took somebody else one and a half please one and a half please can you remember you used to get on the bus didn't you and you go half piece because it was like and I could pay for half even when I was 18 because there was no ID then and I was so short.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah me too small so yeah so I sort of really pushed that half boundary um yeah so it was a half eighteen under 18 yeah yeah so if you were under 18 you paid for half the price of the ticket and he said one and a half one we said what a tight gig yeah I know that's just not a good look is it ninja like also how stupid you've literally just let the let everyone know that she's not old enough to be here hey that 18 thing's not the same age now it's more like 15 now you know when you go to like tickets for gigs fireworks parts like Thought Park la la la it's usually around 15 now isn't it is it yeah yeah I mean I must admit there is some 15 films I I think now when I'm watching a film and I look at the age thing 15's fine for me because there's a lot of graphic there's swearing in a 15 there's sexual content yeah and I think yeah if it says 18 now even I'm thinking to myself no I really don't ever want to see this I don't like meetings I can't stand to watch all anything to do with abuse to women or anything like that and I don't find that I don't find that entertaining to watch or anything so I do I I can't I mean I do think horror I could probably watch more than those two things what about things like horror things like Lutheran I can watch that yeah I can watch that I can't watch that it's real no I can't watch anything that could actually happen give me a zombie movie like aliens gory ripping people's heads off when they're aliens and zombies love it because that can't actually happen or maybe it's I do love as conspiracy but anything about where like your neighbour is a serial killer they find a body in the bins and it like I literally wouldn't sleep for months if I watched Luther I don't mind things yeah quite like Luther I don't mind things like that it's I mean I watched Peaky Binders oh yeah I like that which was good because it was sort of because I think it's not at the moment it's it's like years ago but that had a lot of beatings in and I struggled with that oh it was horrible yeah I struggled with that too the the like graphic violence where you have to look away yeah like really awful violence stuff where you have to look away.

SPEAKER_00

So stuff like that I don't particularly what about Clarkson's Farm do you like Clarkson's Farm?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah have you have you heard obviously all over the I haven't watched it yet no it made me think because they you've seen on the news though the the the having to look away made me think because I've just watched one a few weeks ago no spoilers because it happens all the time but they did send some of the pigs and cows off to be slaughtered and I can't look I can't look at that for that you don't know what's happened in the last two pins. Well I haven't seen it but I've seen all over social media so we're not spilling any tea are we when we say it's bloody everywhere. No so Jeremy's got cancer prostate cancer as well I don't know if it is prostate he's had some of his prostate removed but I've sort of read that he hasn't actually said confirmed what it is what it if it's originally there I don't know oh so he hasn't well I need to actually watch them I think two of I haven't watched the last two yet because the football was on last night wasn't it the football was on and so I didn't watch it last night um so yeah interestingly that's when everybody commented on my post I did notice I had a lot of viewers and everyone was having a go at my gum and I thought they're all just what being made to watch the England game and I'm so annoying to watch football with Scott was watching the England England game and uh I just like who's he I've gotten here is that the manager just like is that which one is England he's like and I'm like who's that is that the manager is that la la la does Wayne Mooney still play just sort of utter shit that I try not to talk because I do I'm aware it's really boring. Yeah I think a lot more I think people were scrolling yeah I would be exactly the same I would I was sort of sat there sort of they won though it's great one yeah I know they did it's a really good game yeah really good game yeah because Scott sat down he was working and he said I was gonna have a break and watch the England game he put the put the TV on and said oh it's a really good game I've missed it because I think there were two nil up or something or three nil up when he switched telly on it's like yeah I've missed it it looks like a really good game so it was great yeah and I love all the fans have you seen the fan behaviour like the Norwegians rowing I love it you've got the Norwegians all sitting in rows all rowing together and then there was the Dutch that were all sitting on the floor and then they jump up and then you've got the Tartanami which apparently drunk Boston dry well my whole algorithm is full on Tartan Army because Scott's from Scotland and it's just my algorithm is just serving all of it and I've interacted with some of it so it's my whole feed is bagpipes, tartan army all the vibes and I just think it's so lifting it's just like that whole thing I think you know groups of smetty sweaty smelly blokes all kissing each other and being happy I think it's so good for everybody. It's so good for the whole world team sports like that. The World Cup's so good for everybody it's so uplifting. Yeah yeah it's just such a good energy around the whole thing I know sometimes they get idiots having flights and stuff like that but generally it seems to be such a really good vibe about it. Yeah so and they're saying that they've drunk and I haven't seen all the stuff about England having drunk all the alcohol in the world or something they can't literally can't make it quick enough for the England and Scotland fans to drink it all that is crazy.

SPEAKER_00

What have you done this week then anyway Kate I haven't spoken to you haven't seen you what have you been doing playing golf lately no that's gone completely out the window at the moment I told you you didn't have time for both I told you I told you um what have I done this week I have well like you I am desperately trying to get this my garden sorted um had nothing in it what what happens when you get to that age where I love having a cup of tea in the morning and just wandering around the garden and seeing how everything's growing and what it's doing. I know I am absolutely a garden centre. Oh my god I love a garden centre so do I my garden's on three levels so it's so we've got when when we moved in there was not one plant in the entire garden not one so we done the bottom layer uh and we put olive trees in and it as you well costs you a fortune and olive trees churching yeah yeah we've got these truffs that we I can't tell you how many bags of soil to actually fill them and then we put the olive trees in and then everything else. Then I put a wisteria in which is lovely it's going mental so that's lovely. And then you go up the stairs and you've got another layer um and that has got artificial grass on it. Now you can't take it up because they've built it up when they they absolutely demolished this house and then redone it again five years before we bought it the couple um and I think all the rubble and everything from the house they piled it in there.

SPEAKER_01

I mean the house the background went like that anyhow but they is it on a slope is the house on a slope right okay so they've just layered it so you can work on it.

SPEAKER_00

Yes yeah so it goes up at the back so they yeah put all the they've made an extension they've done everything they've piled it all in putting everything's in there and a couple of bodies in there as well I would have just and it's just cemented so even if I took the turf off the the there's nothing underneath that do you know what I mean it's just oh really it's just the soil yeah no they've they literally yeah they have put all of their yeah they put all their Renault stuff in there instead of getting a skip. Yeah yeah and and it would have been a nightmare because I've they've literally gutted this house. Yeah so and then you go up three steps and then you've got the top half of the garden which is lawn again and um grass and when I very first it's funny because when I very first put the garden on my Instagram I had people say to me I'm unfollowing you you've got artificial grass it's not my bloody choice can't take it up I've just got concrete on any hand and I came back and said and I've got a bit of artificial grass at the bottom as well which was down and I don't think there is any soil underneath there either because they use the bottom half to get rid of a load of stuff so and so and I had quite a few not just one person. I had quite a few I'm following you you're a mass murderer yeah you've got yeah you've got artificial grass you didn't you'll be like I don't even want the bloody grass anyway and I was gonna I was gonna take it up but then realised that I couldn't you can't yeah so so we've put loads of pots and we're putting loads of pots on the second lot and then the first lot at the top I've got to have regrassed because the grass is just so awful so in September I'm having that taken up and more grass put in and we've just done a border and we've just built two log things so I've been doing that why I've been doing a bit of that this week and then working just been in my bathroom filming.

SPEAKER_01

Filming going back to gardens you've just done your pond haven't you I've got a wildlife pond well I literally was out there today which is why I was late to you I was out there today because I couldn't step away from watering something that I planted at the weekend and uh it was thirsty and I just couldn't step and then you see another one and another one and another one it's thirsty like that. Yeah. But I love it's like this I love it so much. I'm with you I'm out there in my in my pants and vest or my pajamas or flip-flops drinking a cup of tea just looking at it. I mean I don't know what I'm really looking at well I'm looking at butterflies and stuff like that as well.

SPEAKER_00

Well we my mum used to love her garden absolutely love it I mean when we sold her house that was one thing that I just thought it was big it was it was lovely and she spent all hours I don't know how she managed to keep on top of it now when I see how minimal yeah but you know mine is and she had her hers was a big garden especially for her and she had clay soil and it was really hard to dig over but she was always out there um and yeah and I thought I I can't ever imagine myself being like that I can think I always thought oh you know gardens yeah whatever now I'm I'm putting up bird boxes I've got I've got bird feeders everywhere do you know I've got in the thing I've got where like little insects can go in have I all of that so I think this something happens to us very quick and fast because when we first moved here I was literally thinking because we've got quite a lot of trees and I was literally thinking I'd like to cut that tree down I'd like to cut that tree down to get some more light in I don't like that tree is a massive Leylandai that I don't like it's ugly and I don't like it and I was like that's coming down nobody likes Leylandai da da da da and I've done almost a year here and I'm obsessed with feeding the birds like you and everything else and I have noticed that the Ley landai is full of birds.

SPEAKER_01

Birds love it in there also I have these owls that hoot me to sleep and I think they might be in there and I'm like no one's touching their ley land no one's touching it whereas I think five years ago I don't think I'd have been as aware of of that I think I would have been I need to cut that down to like make my house bigger or whatever. Something's definitely changed in me well I've always been a country girl always been a country girl but something is really elevated. I used to take the piss out of my parents I used to say it was the old people's home when I went there because they had this assortment of dodgy bird feeders in the back garden and then near the conservatory window so they can see them and I used to literally take the piss and say it's like the old people's home because they just sit on chairs looking at the birds and I think that was only about five or ten years ago that I did that and I've just bought a camera to film the wildlife when I'm asleep.

SPEAKER_00

Oh see I might I I might invest in that because we've got a wren that started to build a nest underneath the um like we've got like a bit that comes out near where we sit and he they came and built half disappeared off again come back again about two weeks later and started to build another one so I'm like googling away and apparently the male wren look at me how sad I am I'm like first of all how do you know it's a wren yep saw it saw it to knew it was a wren. So did you bird on my mad on the birds and then um apparently I googled it and the male wren makes lots of different nests and then the female chooses which one she wants to oh I'd like to be a wren. Fussy she's fussy so there was he was making it making it And then we saw two, and I thought, oh my god, she's but I don't think she has because the last I wasn't nobody was allowed outside, nobody was allowed near it, just in case, you know. And um, luckily it's been raining up until now, so it didn't really, but anyhow, don't don't think that the nest is there, it's still there, it's still, but Googled it again the other day, and unless they've laid their eggs by the end of June, then they've probably picked another different nest. But apparently they will come back and redo the following year if you know they'll come back and and have another go. But yeah, so I've got bird boxes and everything, and although I had a lot of feeders at the top, and then I went up to the top one morning with my cup of tea, and there was the biggest bloody rat up there, and it was huge, it was massive. I thought it was a hedgehog, it was that big, and I saw it, and then I thought, and then I thought, oh my god, it's running too fast for a hedgehog, and then I saw the tail, and then I came hurtling down the steps, like, and then I Googled that, and apparently you get Roland rack. Apparently, if you feed, if you've got lots of bird feeders up there, they love it.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, they do love it, apparently.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, I've had to move all the bird feeders from the top more down the bottom, hoping that you what you thought it was a head, you wanted it to be a hedgehog.

SPEAKER_01

Maybe it was a rat in a hedgehog outfit trying to try and trick you. It's like went and rented a hedgehog skin so that he could just walk past it. We're like, oh, isn't it funny how things we love and then we don't love? Hedgehog, yeah. Oh, hedgehog, hedgehog rat we hate. We have these things in our heads about things that we do and don't love in wildlife, don't we? Like apparently fox that comes in quite a lot at night time. Yeah, and we were trained to hate foxes, like we were in great, it was ingrained that we hate foxes. Ladybirds too, apparently, ladybogs ladybirds are really mean, aren't they? But we've been trained. We it's been ingrained that ladybirds are these lovely beautiful things, but apparently there's these new, gosh, sorry, gardeners that are listening, who'd be shouting, saying, That's wrong. But I think there's these new ladybirds into the UK from another country or something that are eating all of our native ladybirds and their big old meanings and they're taking over.

SPEAKER_00

Right.

SPEAKER_01

A bit like the grey and the red squirrel thing. Yeah, we are got loads of squirrels, yeah. Me too.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, absolutely loads, and they will do it. Doesn't matter where I put my feeders, and I've put them up, they literally swing from anything to try and get to the inside. I mean, I've got an oak tree in the back of our garden. Um, and I put it up really, I got you know, got ladders to put it up really, and then I've done it with rope, the feeder, they chewed through it on the floor, then I've done it with wire, then they chewed through it on the floor. Um, and then they eventually chewed through one of the branches, and so the whole thing on the floor, yeah. And they are clever, and I've tried everything, but they just come, and I've had to move my olive tree because they come running along and then they snap bits off of the olive tree. I don't know what they do with it. I don't know if they eat it and run off with it. So crazy they're they're a nightmare.

SPEAKER_01

They are a nightmare. Well, I used to love and feed the grey squirrels until I saw them in our last house taking a baby bird to eat. I didn't know they ate baby, I was straight on Googling. What do we do without Google? Oh, straight on Googling it, and I had no idea that they do take baby birds and eat baby birds, and that was it. My love, I was like, you big meanies. And now when I see a squirrel, I'll just go and try and get it to go because I think they're big old meanies and they eat the baby birds. Oh, it's so sad.

SPEAKER_00

We have we've got about some mornings I can wake up and they're there's about four that run around in the the back all together. Um they're really cute, they're really cute. I was feeding them until I learned. Yeah, I I started feeding them as well, but again, because of the rat issue, I haven't been able to feed they're beautiful, they're so pretty.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I'll get my camera up this week, hopefully, and I'll tell you what I've done.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, you'll have to tell me. I I might be having a camera up there soon.

SPEAKER_01

I know, I know. Uh Kate, we've been talking for an hour. Right, okay. Like literally, that's the that's like ding a ling a ling a ling. I think I expect over an hour. I don't know how we do it. I don't know how we do it. We do it quite easily. Yeah, so it's been lovely catching up with you, and thank you to everybody at home for listening. Um, thank you. Next week on Ready and Five.

SPEAKER_02

Yes, have a good weekend.