STARS Foundation Series | Part 4: Action — What Will You Do About It?

Sometimes we recognize the scenario.

Sometimes we notice the trigger.

We know something isn't right.

We know a decision needs to be made.

And then we arrive at one of the most important questions in the STARS Framework:

What will you do about it?

The STARS Framework for Vigilant Living was created to help people think more intentionally about uncertainty, preparedness, decision-making, and resilience before a crisis arrives.

In this Foundation Series, we're exploring each pillar of the STARS Framework one at a time.

Today's episode focuses on the third pillar:

Action — What Will You Do About It?

Awareness matters.

Preparation matters.

But awareness without action changes nothing.

In this episode, Lori Baxley explores the role of decision-making when faced with uncertainty, risk, opportunity, and adversity.

Whether the situation involves personal safety, health, finances, relationships, business, or everyday life, there often comes a moment when information alone is no longer enough.

A choice must be made.

An action must be taken.

A step must be taken forward.

Drawing from personal experience, criminal justice, preparedness principles, and lessons learned through adversity, Lori discusses why decisive action often matters more than perfect action.

As Theodore Roosevelt famously observed:

"In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing."

The question is not whether uncertainty exists.

The question is:

What will you do about it?

About the STARS Framework

The STARS Framework is built around five questions designed to help us navigate uncertainty before crisis arrives:

⭐ Scenarios — What can happen here?

⭐ Triggers — What feels slightly off?

⭐ Action — What will you do about it?

⭐ Routines — What habits keep you safe?

⭐ Stoicism — Can you stay calm when everything isn't?

About the Host

Lori Baxley is the host of Three Sips to Shots Fired: What Happens Before the Sirens.

A survivor of a violent home invasion, former police officer, probation officer, criminal justice professional, educator, and advocate for vigilant living, Lori developed the STARS Framework to help individuals think more intentionally about preparedness, awareness, and resilience in everyday life.

STARS Foundation Series

Part 1: Origin Story of the STARS Framework

Part 2: Scenarios — What Can Happen Here?

Part 3: Triggers — What Feels Slightly Off?

Part 4: Action — What Will You Do About It?

Part 5: Routines — What Habits Keep You Safe?

Part 6: Stoicism — Can You Stay Calm When Everything Isn't?

Part 7: Closing Reflection

Subscribe for future episodes of Three Sips to Shots Fired and conversations exploring what happens before the sirens.

#STARSFramework #Action #DecisionMaking #Preparedness #SituationalAwareness #VigilantLiving #Resilience #ThreeSipsToShotsFired #Leadership #PersonalSafety

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hi again, I'm Lori Baxley, your host. Welcome to part four in this series about the STARS Framework. Let's move right into the third pillar in the STARS Framework. Action. Or maybe framed as a question, what will you do about it? And honestly, this may be where everything starts to change. Because awareness matters. Noticing matters. Paying attention matters. But awareness without action changes nothing. You can recognize the warning sign, feel that something is off, notice the pattern, sense the discomfort, but eventually there comes a moment of decision, a moment where awareness asks something of us. Theodore Roosevelt once said, in any moment of decision, the worst thing you can do is nothing. And I think there's wisdom in that. Because sometimes the greatest risk isn't making the wrong move, it's making no move at all. Staying silent, ignoring the signal, explaining things away, hoping something changes, while doing nothing different. So the third question in the stars framework is this what will you do about it? And I want you to notice something. That question is not what should somebody do? Not what would most people do? Not what you hope happens. The question is personal, direct, specific. What will you do? Because once something feels off, once you notice a trigger, you eventually face a choice. Will you act? Will you speak? Will you leave? Will you ask harder questions? Will you set boundaries? Will you get help? Will you tell the truth? Or will you explain it away? Delay? Freeze? Hope things somehow change on their own? And listen, I say that with compassion, not judgment, because if we're honest, most of us have done both. You know, one of the things I learned over the years, both professionally and personally, is this. People often know what they need to do. They just don't know if they can do it. And there's a difference, because action is hard, especially when emotions are involved, especially when uncertainty is involved, especially when fear shows up. Sometimes the hardest action is simply acknowledging reality, saying something isn't okay here, something has changed, something needs attention, and that sounds simple, but it isn't always simple because reality can be painful, especially when love is involved, history is involved, family is involved, hope is involved. Let's talk about relationships for a minute. Maybe someone repeatedly crosses your boundaries, dismisses your feelings, manipulates conversations, makes you feel small or unsafe, and you notice it. You've noticed it for a while. The trigger is there, something feels off. But then comes the hard question. What will I do about it? Will I speak up? Will I set a boundary? Will I ask difficult questions? Will I leave if I need to? Will I stop explaining away behavior that keeps hurting me? Because here's something I've learned. Love without boundaries often becomes suffering. And boundaries are not punishment. They're clarity, they're wisdom, sometimes they're protection. Maybe it's addiction. And this one is complicated, painfully complicated, because loving someone in addiction can feel like standing between hope and heartbreak. You want to believe, you want to help, you want to save, and sometimes we confuse helping with rescuing or enabling or abandoning ourselves. So maybe action becomes having a difficult conversation, setting healthy limits, protecting finances, seeking support, learning about addiction, choosing compassion without surrendering wisdom. And I know that's easier said than done, but sometimes action looks like saying, I love you, and I cannot keep pretending that this isn't hurting everyone. That takes courage, real courage. Maybe it's personal safety. You're in a situation that feels wrong, someone's behavior changes, something feels off, and your instinct says, leave. But your mind says, don't be rude, don't overreact. You're probably imagining things. Can I gently say this? You are allowed to leave uncomfortable situations. You are allowed to trust yourself. You're allowed to disappoint someone to protect yourself. Read that again, because too many people, especially good people, have been conditioned to prioritize politeness over safety. And I don't think wisdom requires us to ignore ourselves. Sometimes action is practical, simple, every day. Creating a plan, changing a routine, making a phone call, scheduling a therapy, going to treatment, checking on a friend, locking the door, learning something new, having the hard conversation, preparing financially, asking for help. Sometimes action is dramatic, but honestly, most meaningful action is small, quiet, and consistent. And I want to say something here about fear, because fear gets a bad reputation, but fear itself isn't the enemy. Fear is information too. Fear says, something matters, something feels vulnerable, something feels uncertain. The problem isn't fear, the problem is when fear becomes a decision maker, because fear can freeze us. Fear can convince us, wait longer, stay quiet, don't upset anyone. Maybe it'll get better. Maybe you're wrong. And sometimes, waiting costs us more than action ever would. You know what I've seen over and over. Courage rarely feels courageous in the moment. It feels uncomfortable, messy, uncertain, scary. Courage sounds more like, I don't know exactly what happens next, but I know I can't stay here. Or this conversation is hard, but avoiding it isn't helping. Or I don't have a perfect plan, but I need to take one step. And maybe someone listening today needs to hear this. You do not need perfect clarity to take wise action. Sometimes wisdom simply says, take the next right step. And I think there's something deeply human about this because action is really about agency. It's about remembering I still have choices, even when life feels uncertain, even when things hurt, even when I'm scared, even when outcomes aren't guaranteed, I still have influence, I still have a voice, I still have decisions, and sometimes those small decisions change everything. You know, after my own experience in 2019, one thing became incredibly clear to me. Preparation matters, but preparation without action is incomplete. You can think through scenarios, you can notice the triggers, but eventually there comes a moment. A moment where something in you says, now, move, speak, leave, call, pray, protect, respond. And in those moments, you may not feel ready, but action isn't about certainty. It's about courage. So let me ask you something. What action have you been avoiding? What conversation? What decision? What boundary? What truth? What next step? What are you already aware of that your heart has been quietly asking you to address? And maybe, just maybe, today is the day you stop waiting for perfect timing. Because perfect timing rarely arrives. Sometimes wisdom whispers, start here. Take one step, do the next right thing. Because once we begin taking action, the next question becomes, how do we sustain it? How do we prepare ourselves before life gets hard? How do we build habits that strengthen us over time? That brings us to the fourth question. What habits keep you safe? This will be covered in the next part of the series, routines. Until next time, I'm Lori Baxley, host of Three Sits to Shots Fired podcast. Because seconds don't ask permission, and what happens before the sirens matters most.