WEBVTT 00:00:00.479 --> 00:00:02.160 Well, happy Mother's Day. 00:00:02.640 --> 00:00:08.000 I realize for many of us and many of you today can be quite hard. 00:00:08.240 --> 00:00:15.839 Maybe because you were unable to have children, or having a child was just hard, or having children is hard. 00:00:16.079 --> 00:00:17.199 Anybody wave your hand? 00:00:17.839 --> 00:00:20.320 Yeah, you see, the moms are too tired to raise their hands. 00:00:20.399 --> 00:00:22.320 They can't even, you're just like, yes. 00:00:23.039 --> 00:00:25.120 I can't can't get my hand up. 00:00:25.359 --> 00:00:28.480 I I know some of you lost a child this year. 00:00:28.719 --> 00:00:31.839 I know some of you lost your mother this year. 00:00:32.320 --> 00:00:35.679 Or maybe you just simply feel lost. 00:00:36.719 --> 00:00:42.159 It's very easy to feel lost in a role or the role that you serve. 00:00:42.719 --> 00:00:45.520 Last November, a video went viral. 00:00:45.759 --> 00:00:54.000 A young mom, Monica Murphy, she had just had her third child, all three children under the age of four. 00:00:54.159 --> 00:00:55.920 That's kind of like the Jim Gaffigan joke. 00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:57.679 What does it feel like to have five children? 00:00:57.920 --> 00:01:00.240 You're drowning, and somebody throws you a baby. 00:01:02.399 --> 00:01:03.840 Anybody drowning? 00:01:04.400 --> 00:01:06.719 Can't get still too tired of your hand up. 00:01:07.519 --> 00:01:10.799 Well, this mama Monica, she has three kids under four. 00:01:10.959 --> 00:01:13.120 She's drowning in babies. 00:01:13.439 --> 00:01:18.959 And her sweet mom comes by to check on her and to check on these grandbabies. 00:01:19.040 --> 00:01:22.560 And Monica shares her to-do list with her mom. 00:01:22.879 --> 00:01:36.079 Work, stay present on social media, maintain a clean home, breastfeed, be present with my kids, eat a nutritious diet, make time for my husband, keep in touch with my friends, make time for myself, plan activities for kids. 00:01:36.640 --> 00:01:43.439 And on the way out the door, her mom turns around and says something to her. 00:01:43.599 --> 00:01:47.280 The doorbell camera camera catches this short scene for us. 00:01:52.159 --> 00:01:55.120 They're never going to remember if they had a clean house. 00:01:55.519 --> 00:01:58.959 They're going to remember how much you love them and hop off with them. 00:01:59.120 --> 00:01:59.280 Okay. 00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:01.200 Later, love you. 00:02:01.519 --> 00:02:02.159 Bye. 00:02:05.439 --> 00:02:08.560 Don't we just need a mama to say that to us? 00:02:09.280 --> 00:02:15.280 As a parent, especially as a mom, you can just feel like the to-do list just never stops. 00:02:15.360 --> 00:02:22.240 And we we need a mama to turn around to say to us, like, hey, they're not going to remember how clean the baseboards are. 00:02:22.400 --> 00:02:23.280 Like they're not. 00:02:23.680 --> 00:02:25.599 They'll remember how you loved them. 00:02:26.400 --> 00:02:29.680 The mother role can be overwhelming at any stage. 00:02:30.080 --> 00:02:32.560 Most roles can be overwhelming at any stage. 00:02:32.639 --> 00:02:37.280 At first, we love a role, and we love a role because a role can define us. 00:02:37.439 --> 00:02:39.520 We'll pull definition from it. 00:02:39.599 --> 00:02:45.199 And then slowly we become exhausted to the role. 00:02:45.599 --> 00:02:52.800 And then before we know it, we're even condemned by the role because we're not good enough at it. 00:02:53.280 --> 00:02:56.240 And then we wonder: like, is there any relief? 00:02:56.800 --> 00:02:57.599 Is there any hope? 00:02:57.680 --> 00:02:58.960 Is there any help? 00:02:59.439 --> 00:03:07.120 Our text this morning is Luke 10, this well-known story of Jesus with Martha and Mary, Luke 10, 38 through 42. 00:03:07.199 --> 00:03:08.639 Let's read it one more time. 00:03:08.800 --> 00:03:14.560 Now, as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village, and a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. 00:03:14.719 --> 00:03:19.280 And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching. 00:03:19.439 --> 00:03:22.159 But Martha was distracted with much serving. 00:03:22.319 --> 00:03:27.360 And she went up to him and said, Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? 00:03:27.599 --> 00:03:29.599 Tell her then to help me. 00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:36.000 But the Lord answered her, Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. 00:03:36.319 --> 00:03:41.599 Mary has chosen the good portion which will not be taken away from her. 00:03:42.479 --> 00:03:51.280 A few years ago, there was an op-ed in the New York Times entitled, In the Country of Motherhood, Finding My Own Path. 00:03:51.919 --> 00:03:54.159 And I love this quote on Mother's Day. 00:03:54.319 --> 00:03:59.039 Here's what this mom writes about what it feels like to be a mom. 00:03:59.360 --> 00:04:10.159 The Japanese have Kutsingai, a method of repairing broken pottery with gold, making it even more valuable after it has been broken. 00:04:10.400 --> 00:04:20.000 Some of the parenting books I read told me that I should similarly welcome the shattering of myself and that I was made better because I was now a mother. 00:04:20.160 --> 00:04:21.439 I disagreed. 00:04:21.759 --> 00:04:24.959 I liked myself just as I was before I had children. 00:04:25.199 --> 00:04:34.399 While other mothers were taking pride in their new broken and repaired forms, I was on my hands and knees still looking for pieces of myself. 00:04:35.040 --> 00:04:45.439 And I wonder, moms, but any of us really, if you feel like that, if you feel worn down and a bit broken. 00:04:46.639 --> 00:04:49.199 Looking for pieces of yourself. 00:04:49.360 --> 00:04:50.480 Who am I? 00:04:51.600 --> 00:04:52.720 Where am I? 00:04:53.439 --> 00:04:56.079 Martha was the busy, anxious one. 00:04:56.959 --> 00:05:00.000 Mary was the slow, calm one. 00:05:00.319 --> 00:05:03.439 This week I realized, well, I am slow but anxious. 00:05:03.519 --> 00:05:07.680 I'm like, I don't know how that works out. 00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:12.160 Let's ponder two gospel promises. 00:05:12.319 --> 00:05:13.839 First, gospel promise. 00:05:14.079 --> 00:05:20.079 You are more loved and secure in Jesus than the role you serve. 00:05:20.879 --> 00:05:26.240 The Holy Spirit plants this truth into the very core of who we are. 00:05:27.360 --> 00:05:33.360 Much deeper than any role that you will ever serve is your identity in Christ. 00:05:33.600 --> 00:05:40.720 So we are free from our roles and free to serve our roles. 00:05:41.759 --> 00:05:46.240 In the ancient world, the Greek-Roman world, women were seen as property, not as people. 00:05:48.160 --> 00:05:49.839 Girls had almost no education. 00:05:49.920 --> 00:05:53.360 The cultural value on women was close to nothing. 00:05:53.759 --> 00:05:57.199 Women were human doings, they were not human beings. 00:05:57.759 --> 00:06:08.639 And Jesus shows up into this horrible context, and we get this story where Jesus validates Mary while she's doing nothing. 00:06:09.920 --> 00:06:12.000 To be validated while you're doing nothing. 00:06:12.160 --> 00:06:13.839 Moms, can you can you imagine moms? 00:06:14.000 --> 00:06:14.720 Doing nothing? 00:06:15.040 --> 00:06:18.399 Sometimes my wife will say, like, I just want to be sick for a week. 00:06:19.680 --> 00:06:22.800 Like, and then I just get to lay in bed, watch Netflix for one week. 00:06:22.879 --> 00:06:25.360 I don't want to be sick longer than a week, just one week. 00:06:25.439 --> 00:06:27.120 I would like to be sick, really sick. 00:06:27.199 --> 00:06:28.959 You'll all leave me alone. 00:06:31.360 --> 00:06:41.199 You see, God does not value you for the role you do or you do not serve, but for you as you, the core of you. 00:06:42.240 --> 00:06:43.519 His child. 00:06:44.160 --> 00:06:52.240 A few questions to ponder, not to guilt us, but to say grace on us, to free us from roles, to free us to serve the roles. 00:06:52.480 --> 00:06:59.759 Question number one: Do you love and raise your children, or do you use your children to define you? 00:07:00.560 --> 00:07:03.040 Do you love and care for your friends? 00:07:03.360 --> 00:07:06.480 Or do you need them to approve of you? 00:07:06.959 --> 00:07:09.040 Do you love and serve your job? 00:07:09.279 --> 00:07:13.199 Or do you need the next rung-up to finally be okay? 00:07:14.399 --> 00:07:28.240 Mary teaches us that we can let go of roles and the busyness to be defined by that role, and we can be freed into being God's beloved as to be freed to serve our roles. 00:07:28.319 --> 00:07:32.319 So we're freed from, as to be freed to. 00:07:33.120 --> 00:07:41.199 Years ago I talked to my mentor, Pastor Scotty Smith, about busyness, and he said this: Life can quickly become a series of events. 00:07:41.439 --> 00:07:46.639 I always think about it as a busy heart before a busy schedule. 00:07:47.040 --> 00:07:57.600 If the gospel is not the greater narrative of our lives, we subtly begin to feel the need for something to make us whole, to validate us. 00:07:57.920 --> 00:08:02.160 That pressure will create an anxious and busy heart. 00:08:02.879 --> 00:08:03.759 Anybody else? 00:08:03.920 --> 00:08:05.040 Can we get the hands up yet? 00:08:05.120 --> 00:08:06.160 Can we get anybody else? 00:08:06.240 --> 00:08:08.720 Yeah, busy and anxious heart. 00:08:09.519 --> 00:08:10.800 He continued. 00:08:11.360 --> 00:08:13.120 We are made to be productive. 00:08:13.360 --> 00:08:20.560 When God said to his first son and daughter, fill the earth with my glory, that's an awesome, life-fulfilling calling. 00:08:20.720 --> 00:08:22.079 One we still have. 00:08:22.319 --> 00:08:25.199 Be creative, build culture, make beauty. 00:08:25.360 --> 00:08:35.360 The trouble comes when we believe Christianity is more about doing things for Jesus than doing all things with Jesus. 00:08:36.159 --> 00:08:44.240 So our first gospel promise you are more loved and secure in Jesus than the role you serve, which gives us a prayer. 00:08:44.480 --> 00:08:56.639 Something like, Heavenly Father, help me live all the more for my secure place in you as to be freed to joyfully serve the roles you give me. 00:08:56.960 --> 00:09:00.399 And I want us to pause midserment and just pray for our moms. 00:09:00.559 --> 00:09:05.679 And maybe you're with your mom or you're with your wife, and you can just hold her hand or put a hand on her shoulder. 00:09:05.840 --> 00:09:12.639 Maybe your mom is somewhere else around the state or country, and you can just open your hands to pray for her. 00:09:12.879 --> 00:09:14.320 Let's pray together. 00:09:14.639 --> 00:09:27.039 Heavenly Father, we thank you for our moms at every stage that have hearts that are pouring out for their children. 00:09:28.799 --> 00:09:39.519 God, we pray for a greater freedom of their own hearts, a freedom from the motherling role as to be freed into the secure identity they have as your child. 00:09:42.240 --> 00:09:55.279 May that give them a great sense of security, of love, of validation, of wholeness, and of a freedom that allows them and empowers them to joyfully serve the role of mom. 00:09:55.919 --> 00:10:01.440 Help their hearts be comforted, give them great wisdom and all the mothering they do. 00:10:01.679 --> 00:10:03.120 In Christ's name we pray. 00:10:03.440 --> 00:10:04.080 Amen. 00:10:04.879 --> 00:10:09.039 Our family invented a new game in our driveway called Mini Pickle. 00:10:09.120 --> 00:10:15.600 Mini pickle is for people who like pickleball but they're too lazy to walk to the park where the pickleball courts are. 00:10:15.679 --> 00:10:18.399 And so we invented mini pickle in our driveway. 00:10:18.639 --> 00:10:20.960 We have two kind of squares in our driveway. 00:10:21.039 --> 00:10:25.519 The crack between the two squares is the net because we're too lazy to buy a net. 00:10:25.679 --> 00:10:28.960 It's sort of like four-square, but with pickleball rackets. 00:10:29.039 --> 00:10:31.600 Everything's underhanded, no slams, everything's in the hand. 00:10:31.759 --> 00:10:34.639 The ball needs to bounce, everything underhanded. 00:10:34.960 --> 00:10:37.200 And my girls are playing this game a lot. 00:10:37.360 --> 00:10:39.360 Like I'm playing a good bit, they're playing a lot. 00:10:39.440 --> 00:10:41.600 So they're getting better and better and better. 00:10:41.759 --> 00:10:49.039 Last week I was in a match with my middle daughter, and we were playing to seven win by two. 00:10:50.399 --> 00:10:51.200 Win by two. 00:10:51.440 --> 00:10:54.399 I beat her 15 to 13. 00:10:54.639 --> 00:10:56.480 And I wasn't doing the dad thing. 00:10:56.799 --> 00:10:57.679 You know what I'm talking about? 00:10:57.759 --> 00:11:03.360 Or like I'm gonna let you get close and then I'll like, you know, toy with you, and then I'll beat you, and then I'll say I was playing my hardest. 00:11:03.679 --> 00:11:05.600 Like I was playing my hardest. 00:11:07.039 --> 00:11:09.120 And I was not gonna let her win. 00:11:09.200 --> 00:11:14.960 Uh, because like who am I as a man if my 13-year-old mother beats me? 00:11:16.320 --> 00:11:17.840 I like to win. 00:11:18.240 --> 00:11:29.600 Um, even if I lose, I create reasons why I didn't care, or I create reasons why I could have won if I wanted to, and I really didn't want to win, and if I wanted to win, I could have won, I could have beaten. 00:11:30.559 --> 00:11:37.440 Uh and I'll crush little children if I need to for that kind of validation as a middle-aged man. 00:11:38.240 --> 00:11:39.440 I like to win. 00:11:39.679 --> 00:11:43.519 I uh I I wanted to win at planting a church. 00:11:43.759 --> 00:11:46.240 I want to win at pastoring. 00:11:46.399 --> 00:11:48.399 I I don't even know what that means. 00:11:49.679 --> 00:11:54.799 It's been 20 years, and in me is this drive to win at pastoring. 00:11:54.960 --> 00:11:55.919 I don't know what that means. 00:11:56.240 --> 00:11:57.279 I don't think it means anything. 00:11:57.360 --> 00:11:59.519 I don't think there's a such thing, but it's in there. 00:11:59.679 --> 00:12:00.879 I want to win. 00:12:01.120 --> 00:12:02.159 That drives in there. 00:12:02.240 --> 00:12:03.919 But it keeps me motivated, that's good. 00:12:04.000 --> 00:12:07.519 It can also keep you up at night, which is not so good. 00:12:07.840 --> 00:12:17.039 Here's what I've learned when my winning at my roles becomes my source of validation or righteousness. 00:12:17.679 --> 00:12:24.159 Now I'm on an eventual path to exhaustion and condemnation. 00:12:25.200 --> 00:12:27.759 Because I ain't perfect. 00:12:27.919 --> 00:12:32.480 I'm not perfect before my role as a pastor, I'm not perfect as a parent, not perfect as a friend. 00:12:32.960 --> 00:12:36.159 And eventually my daughter's gonna beat me at mini pickle. 00:12:36.320 --> 00:12:37.360 Like it's that's a matter of time. 00:12:37.440 --> 00:12:40.559 It was 15 to 13, and I was trying my hardest. 00:12:41.519 --> 00:12:44.399 None of us run the perfect race. 00:12:45.200 --> 00:12:50.320 We could say this way life completely lived by roles is life by merit. 00:12:50.559 --> 00:12:55.120 And life by merit is exhaustion and condemnation. 00:12:55.440 --> 00:13:08.639 It's amazing in this story how Jesus is just pouring out constant forgiveness to Martha in her sin of busyness and role idolatry. 00:13:10.320 --> 00:13:21.759 And Jesus is extending and pouring out constant forgiveness, validation, constant worth upon Mary, who dares to simply be still. 00:13:22.559 --> 00:13:24.879 And this is the gift of righteousness we have. 00:13:25.120 --> 00:13:35.759 We can see in Martha this constant forgiveness, how it's our sin put upon the cross, and we can see with Mary how he's giving this worth to Mary, how this is his righteousness is given to us. 00:13:36.559 --> 00:13:43.919 Our second gospel promise: God is deeply devoted to you through Christ without conditions or limits. 00:13:44.639 --> 00:13:52.559 Isaiah 49, 14, but Zion, that's a way to say the people of God, said, The Lord has forsaken me. 00:13:53.360 --> 00:13:55.840 My Lord has forgotten me. 00:13:57.279 --> 00:13:59.759 The people are saying, I don't feel loved. 00:14:00.240 --> 00:14:02.159 Like this is hard. 00:14:03.600 --> 00:14:04.559 This is hard. 00:14:04.720 --> 00:14:06.080 I don't feel God. 00:14:06.559 --> 00:14:11.120 I feel like he has forgotten about me. 00:14:12.320 --> 00:14:13.759 I have hurts and needs. 00:14:13.919 --> 00:14:14.639 Where is he? 00:14:15.039 --> 00:14:16.080 Why doesn't he fix? 00:14:16.480 --> 00:14:18.159 Why doesn't he fix this? 00:14:19.360 --> 00:14:22.639 And God doesn't give an explanation to these people. 00:14:23.120 --> 00:14:24.240 Isn't that frustrating? 00:14:24.879 --> 00:14:25.279 Right? 00:14:25.440 --> 00:14:26.720 We've all lived through that. 00:14:27.120 --> 00:14:28.399 He doesn't give an explanation. 00:14:28.879 --> 00:14:34.399 But he gives a promise of love that is with them in their struggle. 00:14:34.720 --> 00:14:36.639 Verses 15 and 16. 00:14:37.360 --> 00:14:45.200 The Lord replies, Could a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? 00:14:45.440 --> 00:14:50.240 Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you. 00:14:50.879 --> 00:14:58.159 Behold, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands, your walls are continually before me. 00:14:58.480 --> 00:15:07.600 The point is, can a mom who uh has had a baby, she's nursing a baby and cares for that baby, could you could she ever not love that baby? 00:15:08.240 --> 00:15:12.320 A mother's love is close and it's intimate and it's unconditional. 00:15:12.799 --> 00:15:24.320 And then verse 15 says, even if you could find a mom who forgot about their baby, God says, not me. 00:15:26.080 --> 00:15:27.440 I'll never forget you. 00:15:28.240 --> 00:15:36.080 I will love you without limits, without conditions, one way, forever, constant love. 00:15:37.039 --> 00:15:46.639 We're like the baby before the mother, and we take and we take and we take and we take and we take, and God gives, and he gives, and he gives and he gives. 00:15:48.399 --> 00:15:51.279 Verse 16, this image changes. 00:15:51.840 --> 00:15:55.600 I've engraved you on the palms of my hand. 00:15:57.519 --> 00:16:05.440 In the context, at the time, a servant might be tattooed with their master's name on the palms of their hands. 00:16:05.759 --> 00:16:10.960 But never would a master be tattooed with their servant's name. 00:16:11.600 --> 00:16:13.279 So what is this verse? 00:16:14.320 --> 00:16:19.360 This image is the reverse of what was going on in culture. 00:16:21.120 --> 00:16:28.480 And it tells us it's not you devoted to God to begin with, or primarily or foundationally. 00:16:29.039 --> 00:16:31.200 It's God devoted to you. 00:16:32.799 --> 00:16:35.360 His hands are tattooed with your name. 00:16:36.159 --> 00:16:43.200 It's a beautiful image of the cross, really, if we think about the scars on Jesus' hands for you. 00:16:43.759 --> 00:16:47.120 And it means God is deeply devoted to you. 00:16:48.399 --> 00:16:49.759 That's the gospel promise. 00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:53.840 God is deeply devoted to you without conditions or limits. 00:16:54.000 --> 00:16:56.559 We know this in Jesus. 00:16:58.799 --> 00:17:06.160 The prayer that comes out of that is, Heavenly Father, help us to rest and grow all the more in your deep devotion to us. 00:17:06.400 --> 00:17:11.519 Help my heart to slow down and to experience your grace and love. 00:17:11.920 --> 00:17:13.599 Let's pray that together. 00:17:15.039 --> 00:17:22.960 Heavenly Father, we confess and admit that we often act like Martha. 00:17:25.039 --> 00:17:32.079 We use busyness to feel important, and we use roles to feel whole or validated. 00:17:34.640 --> 00:17:38.319 Would you forgive us for this confusion of our hearts? 00:17:39.039 --> 00:17:41.680 For the sin in us that turns away from you. 00:17:42.000 --> 00:17:51.279 Would you woo us back by your grace that we are fully and always forgiven and fully and always righteous in Jesus? 00:17:51.759 --> 00:17:58.240 And help our hearts to be quieted by your grace with us. 00:18:00.480 --> 00:18:06.319 Help us to trust all the more in Jesus, who is sufficient for us in all ways. 00:18:07.680 --> 00:18:10.720 And help us to still our hearts in front of you. 00:18:11.519 --> 00:18:12.880 In Christ's name we pray. 00:18:13.039 --> 00:18:13.359 Amen.