WEBVTT 00:00:00.800 --> 00:00:02.000 May be seated. 00:00:02.319 --> 00:00:03.759 Thank you, Sam, for reading that. 00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:07.200 Sam's been reading a lot as we go through the book of Genesis. 00:00:07.280 --> 00:00:08.720 His readings are getting longer and longer. 00:00:08.880 --> 00:00:09.519 He's doing great. 00:00:09.679 --> 00:00:10.880 I love not having to read them. 00:00:11.039 --> 00:00:14.800 Alright, so we've been going through these different stories through the book of Genesis. 00:00:14.880 --> 00:00:23.039 And this morning, what I want to do is I want to tell one great, grand, sort of epic family dysfunctional story. 00:00:23.600 --> 00:00:34.320 And we'll as we go through it, we'll kind of pull some different things out of it that I think relate to us, and we'll eventually get caught up to the passage that Sam just read for us. 00:00:34.640 --> 00:00:38.399 So if you remember we had Abraham, right, a few weeks ago. 00:00:38.560 --> 00:00:41.359 Abraham, the kind of the father of many nations. 00:00:41.520 --> 00:00:47.359 And so out of Abraham, Isaac, and Ishmael, out of Isaac, Isaac comes Jacob and Esau. 00:00:47.520 --> 00:00:49.840 Jacob marries Rebekah. 00:00:50.079 --> 00:00:56.000 And so now we have this story about this story about Jacob. 00:00:56.159 --> 00:00:59.039 I mean, Isaac marries Rebekah, out of them comes Jacob. 00:00:59.119 --> 00:01:08.879 So now Jacob he steals, remember last week, you know, Jacob steals this blessing from his brother, and then he like kind of steals the inheritance, and Esau is filled with anger. 00:01:09.040 --> 00:01:12.319 And so Jacob goes on the run. 00:01:12.560 --> 00:01:17.359 Rebekah, mama, mama says to Jacob, she says, You got you got to get out of here, you gotta go. 00:01:17.519 --> 00:01:19.519 Esau is so angry, you've got to take off. 00:01:19.680 --> 00:01:23.439 Go to my brother's house, Laban, go and hide out at Laban's house. 00:01:23.599 --> 00:01:26.480 And so Jacob takes off, and that's where he goes. 00:01:26.719 --> 00:01:27.519 He runs. 00:01:27.680 --> 00:01:28.719 He's on the run. 00:01:28.879 --> 00:01:36.959 And as he's getting near and close to Laban's house, he he finds some of Laban's folks, his shepherds, and they're watering animals. 00:01:37.040 --> 00:01:42.079 And so he stops there, and sure enough, a girl shows up. 00:01:42.719 --> 00:01:44.159 She's beautiful. 00:01:44.400 --> 00:01:46.239 And Jacob sees this girl. 00:01:46.560 --> 00:01:48.239 This girl, her name's Rachel. 00:01:48.400 --> 00:01:53.200 And he sees her, and just right away, he's I want to marry her. 00:01:53.359 --> 00:01:59.840 You know, like never mind whether we can resolve conflict or have a decent conversation or have fun together. 00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:03.200 Uh just I want to marry her. 00:02:03.920 --> 00:02:05.519 Who cares about the other stuff? 00:02:06.239 --> 00:02:08.080 He knows that's who he wants to marry. 00:02:08.319 --> 00:02:14.639 And so he he goes to Laban and he starts to work for Laban, and finally Laban comes back to him and says, You know, how how should I pay you? 00:02:14.719 --> 00:02:15.680 How should we work this out? 00:02:15.840 --> 00:02:18.000 You know, how should we how should I pay you your wage? 00:02:18.080 --> 00:02:22.639 And he says, Well, I'll work for you so that I can marry your daughter. 00:02:22.800 --> 00:02:24.719 And so Laban says, Great, seven years. 00:02:24.879 --> 00:02:28.080 You work for me seven years, and then you can marry Rachel. 00:02:28.159 --> 00:02:33.039 And so Genesis 29, verse 20 says that it actually seemed to him but a few days. 00:02:33.199 --> 00:02:38.240 The seven years are just a few days because of the love he had for her. 00:02:38.639 --> 00:02:41.360 And so finally the wedding comes. 00:02:41.680 --> 00:02:45.360 The wedding's in the evening, the bride is veiled. 00:02:46.800 --> 00:02:48.639 Jacob's in the tent. 00:02:49.840 --> 00:02:54.879 And so in comes the bride to consummate the marriage. 00:02:55.520 --> 00:03:09.199 They consummate the marriage, the night occurs, they wake up in the morning, no longer is there darkness, no longer is there a veil, but morning light is there, and it's not Rachel. 00:03:10.479 --> 00:03:10.800 Right? 00:03:10.960 --> 00:03:15.360 I mean, you remember the story, and then it's it's her older sister Leah. 00:03:15.599 --> 00:03:23.599 And the scriptures actually say that uh she was weak-eyed, which means that people thought she was ugly. 00:03:25.360 --> 00:03:27.919 And so uh Jacob is distraught. 00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:30.639 This is not the this is not the girl that he wanted to marry. 00:03:30.719 --> 00:03:31.919 This isn't the girl that he loved. 00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:35.680 And now he's married to a girl he had no intentions of marrying. 00:03:35.759 --> 00:03:38.159 And so Jacob goes back to Laban and says, You tricked me. 00:03:38.319 --> 00:03:38.879 What's going on here? 00:03:38.960 --> 00:03:43.439 Laban said, No, you you you the oldest sister always gets married first. 00:03:44.639 --> 00:03:46.960 And now what here's what we'll do, Laban. 00:03:47.199 --> 00:03:48.960 He's he's just working it here. 00:03:49.039 --> 00:03:50.719 Laban says, hey, here's what we can do. 00:03:50.879 --> 00:03:53.439 You can have a week of honeymoon with Leah. 00:03:53.599 --> 00:04:01.039 At the end of that week, you can marry Rachel right away, and but then you have to serve and work for me another seven years. 00:04:03.199 --> 00:04:12.800 Now we don't know where uh Rachel was that first wedding night, but we can only imagine how cheap Leah felt. 00:04:14.479 --> 00:04:16.399 The guy doesn't want to marry you. 00:04:17.600 --> 00:04:20.959 He wants to marry your younger sister who's more beautiful than you. 00:04:22.160 --> 00:04:27.839 And in order for you to get married, your father has to trick a guy into it. 00:04:29.920 --> 00:04:39.279 And furthermore, that this guy is going to honeymoon with you for a week, and then he's gonna go and marry your more beautiful sister a week from then. 00:04:40.959 --> 00:04:42.160 I mean, let's not forget. 00:04:42.319 --> 00:04:43.279 I mean, these are people, right? 00:04:43.360 --> 00:04:44.560 I mean, these are real people. 00:04:44.639 --> 00:04:48.079 They just lived a long time ago, but these are real people with real feelings. 00:04:48.240 --> 00:04:51.920 I mean, how cheap could she have possibly felt? 00:04:52.160 --> 00:04:55.040 I mean, this turns into an absolute nightmare. 00:04:55.199 --> 00:05:03.439 Now, polygamy is not God's design for relationships, and this turns into a polygamy, sister, dysfunction, disaster. 00:05:04.480 --> 00:05:12.800 They actually get into this competition, like who can have more children for Jacob, and it's all competition toward each other. 00:05:13.279 --> 00:05:15.680 You can read all about that in chapter 30. 00:05:15.839 --> 00:05:18.800 I I just keep going back to this wedding night. 00:05:19.439 --> 00:05:25.759 And just thinking about Leo walking into that tent with that veil on, and all she's hoping, right? 00:05:25.839 --> 00:05:30.160 Like she's hoping that this guy will love her. 00:05:30.639 --> 00:05:33.040 Could this guy possibly love me? 00:05:33.199 --> 00:05:41.279 When the morning comes and the veil is gone and I am known for me, I'm not covered by anything. 00:05:41.519 --> 00:05:45.519 Will he, could he possibly love me? 00:05:45.759 --> 00:05:51.040 This is what's so devastatingly wrong and shallow about hookup culture. 00:05:52.240 --> 00:05:52.560 Right? 00:05:53.040 --> 00:05:58.879 We can talk about it morally, we can condemn it morally, but I'll just say it's absolutely heartless. 00:05:59.439 --> 00:06:12.560 Because by the cover of night and by a veil, people go into the night, and in the morning, when the light comes and the veil is removed, it's just people looking at each other going, could you possibly love me now? 00:06:13.360 --> 00:06:15.120 Like you did last night? 00:06:17.360 --> 00:06:19.920 And it's just tormenting false hope. 00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:22.800 And Leah does it, and maybe she felt forced to do it. 00:06:23.040 --> 00:06:28.399 Maybe she believed that this is the only way someone could ever love her. 00:06:28.639 --> 00:06:32.079 The only way was just to cover up her true self. 00:06:32.319 --> 00:06:36.160 Like that's the way to get love is to cover up your true self. 00:06:37.680 --> 00:06:42.399 Just after college, Christy and I, we were dating, and it was a big uh Georgia game coming up. 00:06:42.720 --> 00:06:45.920 Forgive me if you've heard this story, it's just too good of a story not to retell. 00:06:46.399 --> 00:06:48.000 And so big Georgia games come up. 00:06:48.160 --> 00:06:55.279 A friend of ours was the head of Georgia girls, and so the Georgia girls are are like the all the pretty girls who show around the recruits. 00:06:55.439 --> 00:07:07.360 Okay, like each recruit gets a Georgia girl for the day, and they're sweet to them, and they eat lunch with them, they show them the facilities, they attend the game with them, and that's what the Georgia girls do, and you hope that all that's gonna get your recruits, right? 00:07:07.439 --> 00:07:09.360 Every team does it, it's nothing special. 00:07:09.519 --> 00:07:14.639 And so our friend was the head of the Georgia girls, and we didn't have tickets, and we didn't want to buy tickets. 00:07:14.720 --> 00:07:15.439 It was a big game. 00:07:15.519 --> 00:07:18.240 I think it was versus Tennessee, it was a huge game at the time. 00:07:18.399 --> 00:07:20.959 And so we call her and say, like, hey, can you just get us in? 00:07:21.120 --> 00:07:23.199 Can you get us into the stadium? 00:07:23.360 --> 00:07:24.879 And she said, sure, I'll get you in. 00:07:24.959 --> 00:07:30.560 I'll put your name on the list, show up to the players' training facility at noon. 00:07:30.720 --> 00:07:32.480 And so Christy and I show up. 00:07:32.560 --> 00:07:36.560 We didn't we we figured we're gonna show up and like two tickets are gonna be handed to us. 00:07:36.720 --> 00:07:38.959 We show up and our names are down. 00:07:39.120 --> 00:07:40.480 I'm a recruit. 00:07:41.839 --> 00:07:47.199 So I'm a quarterback, which in only a couple positions that would work, right? 00:07:47.360 --> 00:07:50.639 Like punter, quarterback, kicker. 00:07:50.800 --> 00:07:51.519 That's about it. 00:07:51.600 --> 00:07:54.959 I mean, there's really nothing else that's even in the realm of possible. 00:07:55.120 --> 00:07:56.560 And so I'm a quarterback. 00:07:56.639 --> 00:08:02.560 Um, you know, I'm you know 23 or 4 at the age, but I'm acting, I look like I was 18, so it worked out fine. 00:08:02.959 --> 00:08:14.319 And so we eat lunch with the recruits because I'm a recruit, I'm a quarterback recruit, and so I start to you know play it a little bit, get a little, you know, a little strut when I walk and act like I'm more important than everybody else. 00:08:14.399 --> 00:08:17.040 And so I started to fit in very nicely. 00:08:17.839 --> 00:08:20.160 After lunch, we all board all the recruits. 00:08:20.399 --> 00:08:24.480 We all board the bus to go down the hill toward the stadium. 00:08:24.560 --> 00:08:29.680 And if you're a Georgia fan, you know where I'm headed because I'm headed to the dog walk. 00:08:29.920 --> 00:08:37.759 Now, if you're not a Georgia fan, that sounds like the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard of, but you have your own ridiculous things that you do with your teams and you know what those are. 00:08:37.919 --> 00:08:56.639 And so the dog walk is where thousands and thousands and thousands of people, they all come right outside the stadium, and all the recruits get off the bus, and we, the recruits, we walk through a human tunnel into the stadium where everybody's cheering for us and patting us on the back. 00:08:57.120 --> 00:09:00.320 And so we get there, I'm so excited to be a recruit. 00:09:00.399 --> 00:09:08.879 I'm so excited to be there, and possibly be a quarterback from the University of Georgia, and the doors open, and it's the most amazing moment for me. 00:09:09.039 --> 00:09:13.759 Uh a few people get off first, and I'm like the third, third guy off, and Chrissy's behind me. 00:09:13.840 --> 00:09:21.120 And I I step like down to that last step and I look over to my left, and there are two of my very good friends. 00:09:22.240 --> 00:09:36.080 And they just look, and I just I give them a little wink just out of the side, and I just walk, you know, just act like this normal thing that's going on, and walk through that tunnel, everybody's patting me on the back, and you know, you're amazing, you know, you gotta be a dog, you gotta be a dog. 00:09:36.159 --> 00:09:42.879 And you know, the beginning of it, I'm kind of by the end, I'm like, I don't know, you know, I got a lot of options, and see what happens, let's see what plays out. 00:09:43.120 --> 00:09:50.720 And get into the stadium and walk around the field, and you know, you have 90,000 people looking down on you. 00:09:50.799 --> 00:09:55.279 And man, I've never been celebrated like that before. 00:09:55.519 --> 00:09:55.840 Right? 00:09:55.919 --> 00:09:58.559 Like nobody's had a parade for me, right? 00:09:58.720 --> 00:10:01.200 Thousands and thousands of people patting me on the back. 00:10:01.360 --> 00:10:06.799 That doesn't happen, tell me that they approve of me and they love me and they want me, right? 00:10:06.879 --> 00:10:12.639 And for me, the ideal self inside of me, not the true self, but the ideal self. 00:10:12.879 --> 00:10:15.440 Oh, the ideal self loves this. 00:10:15.679 --> 00:10:20.000 Because the ideal self loves to project this sort of thing into the world. 00:10:20.159 --> 00:10:21.759 And so I'm just soaring. 00:10:21.840 --> 00:10:28.559 So the ideal self is just emerging, and even though it's not real, uh, just emerging and loving it. 00:10:28.720 --> 00:10:32.799 But you know what has to happen is the true self has to come out. 00:10:33.039 --> 00:10:36.080 The true self always ends up coming out. 00:10:36.320 --> 00:10:45.120 And so finally, Christian and I we walk off the field and we walk up and we stand in the student section with some friends, and like that's the true self. 00:10:46.159 --> 00:10:48.320 But I had a good time that day, right? 00:10:48.480 --> 00:10:50.080 Like, that was good. 00:10:50.399 --> 00:10:56.320 But there's always this difference between the true self and the ideal self. 00:10:56.559 --> 00:10:59.200 And these things are in competition with each other. 00:10:59.360 --> 00:11:05.120 This is going on inside of everybody, whether you're a Christian, you're a non-Christian, you're agnostic, you're atheist, you're spiritual, you're Buddhist. 00:11:05.200 --> 00:11:11.200 It doesn't matter what you are, this is occurring in you, the true self and the ideal self that are at odds. 00:11:11.360 --> 00:11:15.679 My friends at Mocky Bird, which is conferences and books, and you you should read what they put out. 00:11:15.759 --> 00:11:18.960 They talk about how we've we've even created platforms, right? 00:11:19.039 --> 00:11:24.480 Like social media for us to put out the ideal self. 00:11:24.720 --> 00:11:30.960 And you can think and I can think that we're being honest and we're being as honest as we want to be, but it's all curated by you. 00:11:31.679 --> 00:11:33.600 It's all curated by you. 00:11:34.000 --> 00:11:40.559 And you, as a fallen person, you're creating some measure of an ideal self that you're putting out for people to see. 00:11:41.519 --> 00:11:43.360 And there's no end to it, right? 00:11:43.440 --> 00:11:54.480 There's like there's always another post, another tweet, another picture, and there's always another reaction to read to your post or tweet or picture, so then you'll curate your next one to be in response to that one. 00:11:54.960 --> 00:11:57.039 And this is the ideal self at work. 00:11:58.159 --> 00:12:00.080 And you know it, and you know it doesn't end. 00:12:00.240 --> 00:12:03.440 See, the ideal self is never satisfied. 00:12:03.679 --> 00:12:04.720 It can't be. 00:12:04.879 --> 00:12:07.039 The ideal self always runs. 00:12:07.840 --> 00:12:09.039 It always runs. 00:12:09.279 --> 00:12:12.639 And the running is what Christians call the condition of sin. 00:12:13.440 --> 00:12:25.919 It's just a heart that's refusing redemption in Jesus to the broken, sinful self, and rather it's relying upon self-deliverance of sin for righteousness and for value. 00:12:26.240 --> 00:12:30.159 See, the ideal self has no need for grace, no need for divine love. 00:12:31.440 --> 00:12:32.559 I don't need grace. 00:12:32.639 --> 00:12:34.720 I don't need God when I'm on the dog walk. 00:12:34.799 --> 00:12:35.360 Are you kidding? 00:12:35.519 --> 00:12:36.159 I am God. 00:12:36.320 --> 00:12:39.200 I mean, I'm a quarterback God in that moment. 00:12:39.440 --> 00:12:42.960 There are thousands and thousands of people that are approve of me. 00:12:43.200 --> 00:12:43.519 Right? 00:12:43.679 --> 00:12:47.039 The ideal self, that's what the ideal ideal self wants. 00:12:47.679 --> 00:12:51.120 But it's endless pretending and performing to get it. 00:12:54.000 --> 00:12:56.559 This is where Leah and Jacob are headed. 00:12:57.279 --> 00:13:04.559 Going back to the story, Leah and Jacob are they're headed with the fact that there's this ideal self they're putting out there, but the true self is going to catch up. 00:13:04.720 --> 00:13:08.799 See, for Leah, the projection of her ideal self, it's seen in her childbearing. 00:13:09.360 --> 00:13:13.840 She begins to use her childbearing as a way to get Jacob to love her. 00:13:14.879 --> 00:13:20.960 So what she thinks is that she thinks what she thinks is not available to her is for her to be her. 00:13:22.399 --> 00:13:24.000 So we create an ideal self. 00:13:24.159 --> 00:13:30.639 You can't be you and be loved, therefore you create an ideal self so that that self can be loved. 00:13:31.759 --> 00:13:34.799 Here's what she says in Genesis 29, verse 34. 00:13:35.039 --> 00:13:50.320 Now this time, she says, like the other two kids, uh, number one and number two didn't do it, but now this time my husband will be attached to me because I have borne him three sons. 00:13:54.960 --> 00:13:58.000 So, like with the with this son, the third one, this will do it. 00:13:58.080 --> 00:14:02.960 I was hoping with number one, I was hoping with number two, but like this one, this one, now this time this will do it. 00:14:03.120 --> 00:14:06.399 Finally, he will attach me, finally I will get it. 00:14:08.720 --> 00:14:14.159 And then with her fourth son, finally the grace of God breaks through. 00:14:14.480 --> 00:14:15.840 She's at her end. 00:14:16.320 --> 00:14:22.960 Just the next verse it says, This time I will praise the Lord, and she has her fourth son. 00:14:24.639 --> 00:14:29.840 Her core root for love changed from her husband to the Lord. 00:14:30.480 --> 00:14:34.320 And she names that boy Judah, which means to praise. 00:14:34.639 --> 00:14:38.879 And it's through him the covenant is fulfilled and the lineage to Jesus occurs. 00:14:39.200 --> 00:14:40.399 So Leah gets it. 00:14:40.480 --> 00:14:44.639 She trusts in the Lord, she rests in him, she understands like now this time, right? 00:14:44.720 --> 00:14:54.720 Like that mentality of now this time, like this kid or this kid or this thing or this approval or this friend or this achievement, like the endlessness of the ideal self that puts us on that track. 00:14:54.879 --> 00:14:58.480 She finally gets that will keep going, and I'm tired of it. 00:14:58.720 --> 00:15:03.840 So I'm going to take my true self and present it before the Lord, and that's where I'm going to rest. 00:15:04.639 --> 00:15:06.399 So Leah gets it. 00:15:06.720 --> 00:15:12.320 And see, as we understand Leah, we can understand Jacob, and as we understand both of them, we understand ourselves. 00:15:13.039 --> 00:15:14.879 And we can just kind of stop here, right? 00:15:15.039 --> 00:15:29.200 I mean, if we if we just get real honest at this point, and many of us would say underneath a lot of walls of activity and underneath a lot of self-protective walls that have gone up over the years, you go, I don't know. 00:15:29.360 --> 00:15:40.559 Like, I mean, I'm at like I see Leah getting this, but there's a terror in your heart that nobody would really love you if that veil that veil came off. 00:15:43.600 --> 00:15:56.080 And you're caught in an endless trap of self-protecting and projecting an ideal self, thinking that you can fight love out of the world and that you're gonna win. 00:15:59.120 --> 00:16:02.159 And God Himself would say, be a beloved child. 00:16:03.519 --> 00:16:08.399 We read this little children's book in our house, and it says, I love you just because you're mine. 00:16:12.559 --> 00:16:14.559 Story picks back up in Genesis 31. 00:16:14.639 --> 00:16:17.120 Jacob and Laban, they eventually get sideways. 00:16:17.519 --> 00:16:19.759 Uh they just kind of at each other. 00:16:20.000 --> 00:16:22.720 And finally, Jacob decides he's gonna take off. 00:16:22.879 --> 00:16:24.879 He takes his people, he takes his animals, he takes off. 00:16:25.039 --> 00:16:34.879 Laban pursues him, they argue, finally, they kind of come to terms, they come to agreement, and Jacob begins his trip home. 00:16:35.279 --> 00:16:37.360 Now you remember who's at home? 00:16:37.840 --> 00:16:41.039 Esau, angry brother. 00:16:41.279 --> 00:16:46.159 Now, it's been a long time, you know, at least 14 years. 00:16:46.960 --> 00:16:49.039 But he's not sure what's going to be awaiting him. 00:16:49.120 --> 00:16:50.159 And Jacob's afraid. 00:16:50.720 --> 00:16:55.519 He's afraid for his life, yet he's headed home because he's getting to a break point. 00:16:55.679 --> 00:16:57.600 Jacob's getting to a breaking point. 00:16:57.759 --> 00:17:00.000 And he sends groups in front of him, right? 00:17:00.080 --> 00:17:02.480 He's like, well, let's think as strategic as possible. 00:17:02.720 --> 00:17:04.559 Make a bribe, my brother, here. 00:17:04.720 --> 00:17:10.160 So he sends groups in front of him, groups of people with gifts, may kind of warm his brother up. 00:17:10.799 --> 00:17:13.440 And on this journey back, Jacob meets God. 00:17:14.799 --> 00:17:22.079 And it's almost as if God was just sort of like watching and waiting for when he was going to step in and interrupt into Jacob's life. 00:17:22.160 --> 00:17:24.799 And this is a totally strange scene, right? 00:17:24.960 --> 00:17:27.039 This scene that Sam read for it. 00:17:27.200 --> 00:17:28.160 What a strange scene. 00:17:28.240 --> 00:17:32.079 And some people would say it's literal, some people would say it's figurative. 00:17:32.319 --> 00:17:33.519 There's a lot of debate with that. 00:17:33.839 --> 00:17:37.039 What I think is I think that the meaning is very clear. 00:17:37.359 --> 00:17:40.319 The text says that Jacob wrestles with God. 00:17:40.559 --> 00:17:44.559 And this makes sense because he's been wrestling his entire life. 00:17:44.720 --> 00:17:47.440 Literally, he was wrestling in the womb. 00:17:48.640 --> 00:17:50.880 He's always fighting, always struggling. 00:17:50.960 --> 00:17:55.680 He's always trying to fight out of the world the blessing he wanted. 00:17:56.000 --> 00:17:59.839 That ideal self, fighting and fighting and fighting and fighting. 00:17:59.920 --> 00:18:01.920 And the fighting is sin, is what it is. 00:18:02.079 --> 00:18:06.880 It's prideful self-deliverance rather than humble faith in God's sufficiency. 00:18:06.960 --> 00:18:07.759 It's what it is. 00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:10.079 It's justification by the law. 00:18:10.240 --> 00:18:18.160 It's creating and living up to standards to feel justified and valued rather than the relief of God's grace to do it. 00:18:19.039 --> 00:18:22.079 And it's a fight against God and God's provision. 00:18:22.240 --> 00:18:29.440 And thus the wrestling match, and thus the weariness and the exhaustion that comes with this kind of life. 00:18:30.240 --> 00:18:38.799 So Genesis 32, 24 and 25, and Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him until the breaking of the day. 00:18:39.039 --> 00:18:44.559 When the man saw that he did not prevail against Jacob, he touched his hip socket. 00:18:44.880 --> 00:18:49.519 And Jacob's hip was put out of joint as he wrestled with him. 00:18:50.400 --> 00:18:52.559 So God allowed Jacob to win. 00:18:53.119 --> 00:18:59.839 But the hip touch suggests that God could intervene at any point, take him down at any point. 00:19:00.559 --> 00:19:01.839 And it's enough. 00:19:02.079 --> 00:19:04.400 It's enough to humble Jacob. 00:19:04.640 --> 00:19:09.519 And something comes over Jacob and he grasps hold of this man and he won't let go. 00:19:09.759 --> 00:19:13.440 And he says, he says, I will not let go unless you bless me. 00:19:13.599 --> 00:19:25.200 So like all the other blessings I've been trying to fight out of the world, like the inheritance I fought out of Esau, the blessing I fought out of my dad, all of that that I've been fighting and fighting for in this world. 00:19:25.680 --> 00:19:27.519 All of that, it doesn't matter. 00:19:28.000 --> 00:19:29.839 It's the blessing from you that I want. 00:19:29.920 --> 00:19:32.640 It's the blessing from you that I need. 00:19:34.079 --> 00:19:35.839 And it can't be earned. 00:19:36.079 --> 00:19:38.240 And he's just left begging. 00:19:39.920 --> 00:19:44.880 And here we see not the ideal Jacob, we see the true Jacob. 00:19:45.200 --> 00:19:48.079 We see the true self finally revealed. 00:19:48.319 --> 00:19:52.720 We see what Leah was at after child four. 00:19:55.680 --> 00:19:56.000 Right? 00:19:56.079 --> 00:19:59.920 I mean, we see that Jacob's no different than Leah, and we see that we're no different than them. 00:20:00.400 --> 00:20:02.000 And all of us are just wondering, right? 00:20:02.079 --> 00:20:14.960 Like underneath the pretending and the performing and often destructive behavior, what we're wondering is that if I stop all of it, if I stop it, and if I let walls down, or I let the veil up, and I'm just known as a beggar. 00:20:16.480 --> 00:20:18.319 Like, will I be loved then? 00:20:21.119 --> 00:20:25.920 Chapter 33, Jacob returns to Esau, and Jacob's broken at this point. 00:20:26.160 --> 00:20:28.319 There's no fighting left in him. 00:20:28.640 --> 00:20:32.160 And he's formally bowing as he goes. 00:20:32.880 --> 00:20:33.680 Several times. 00:20:33.839 --> 00:20:35.359 I mean he's fearing the worst. 00:20:35.680 --> 00:20:40.640 He's thinking that he's going to get a fight coming at him, but there's no fight left in him. 00:20:40.880 --> 00:20:42.559 His ideal self is done. 00:20:42.640 --> 00:20:44.400 He has been blessedly caught. 00:20:44.480 --> 00:20:47.519 All that's left is he's at the end of himself. 00:20:49.200 --> 00:20:52.400 And we can read about this in verse 1 of chapter 33. 00:20:52.559 --> 00:20:59.759 And Jacob lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, Esau was coming, and 400 men with him. 00:21:00.160 --> 00:21:08.240 So he divided the children among Leah and Rachel and the two female servants, and he put the servants with their children in front. 00:21:08.559 --> 00:21:13.359 Then Leah with her children, and Rachel and Joseph, last of all. 00:21:13.920 --> 00:21:19.279 He himself went on before them, bowing himself to the ground seven times. 00:21:19.519 --> 00:21:20.319 There's nothing left. 00:21:20.400 --> 00:21:21.279 He's at the end of himself. 00:21:21.440 --> 00:21:21.920 Do you get this? 00:21:22.000 --> 00:21:24.319 I mean, there's there's nothing left in this man. 00:21:24.640 --> 00:21:30.559 He is bowing as he goes until he came near his brother. 00:21:31.440 --> 00:21:42.480 But Esau ran to him and embraced him and fell on his neck and kissed him and they wept. 00:21:45.759 --> 00:21:46.079 Right? 00:21:46.160 --> 00:21:50.160 This is that this is like a cheek to cheek hug, like whiskers, right? 00:21:50.319 --> 00:21:52.240 We talked about it a few weeks ago. 00:21:53.119 --> 00:21:54.400 This is a real hug. 00:21:54.559 --> 00:21:56.960 I mean, they kiss and they weep. 00:21:57.279 --> 00:21:59.119 I mean, this is what we need to work on, right? 00:21:59.200 --> 00:22:03.200 Like to be able to To really hug and to be willing to weep. 00:22:03.519 --> 00:22:05.599 Last week, Jeremy, we almost wept together over there. 00:22:05.680 --> 00:22:06.240 We came close. 00:22:06.319 --> 00:22:08.720 We decided to fold chairs instead, right? 00:22:09.119 --> 00:22:10.480 We're going to work on it. 00:22:10.720 --> 00:22:13.680 Next time we're going to hug and we're going to weep. 00:22:16.079 --> 00:22:20.000 This is just a picture of restoration and redemption. 00:22:20.079 --> 00:22:21.759 It's a picture of the gospel. 00:22:22.799 --> 00:22:30.480 A God that does not berate and condemn, but wraps us up and weeps with us. 00:22:30.880 --> 00:22:41.119 And in verse 9, Jacob says, I have seen your face, which is like seeing the face of God, and you have accepted me. 00:22:41.519 --> 00:22:42.160 Do you see it? 00:22:42.240 --> 00:22:44.079 Do you see the picture we're receiving here? 00:22:44.240 --> 00:22:56.880 Jacob was saying to Esau, I've offended you, I've stolen from you, I've stolen your glory, I deserve nothing, and I'm left to be a beggar, and you have opened your arms to me. 00:22:57.920 --> 00:23:00.480 And Esau's saying, And I know you, brother. 00:23:00.799 --> 00:23:02.240 I know who you are. 00:23:02.480 --> 00:23:04.160 I know what you've done. 00:23:04.480 --> 00:23:06.640 I know you and I love you. 00:23:09.359 --> 00:23:12.640 What Jesus says to the father is he says, I know that boy Russ. 00:23:13.759 --> 00:23:14.799 I know who he is. 00:23:14.960 --> 00:23:16.079 I know he's a runner. 00:23:16.319 --> 00:23:17.680 I know he's still a runner. 00:23:17.759 --> 00:23:18.880 I know he pretends a lot. 00:23:19.039 --> 00:23:19.839 I know he performs. 00:23:19.920 --> 00:23:22.079 I know he gets really tired. 00:23:22.559 --> 00:23:23.279 I know him. 00:23:23.599 --> 00:23:24.480 I know all of him. 00:23:24.720 --> 00:23:26.079 Father, I know that boy. 00:23:26.319 --> 00:23:28.400 It's all been forgiven. 00:23:28.559 --> 00:23:30.000 I take away the sin. 00:23:30.160 --> 00:23:31.759 I take away the shame. 00:23:32.079 --> 00:23:34.160 My righteousness is on him. 00:23:34.640 --> 00:23:37.200 He is your created boy, your beloved. 00:23:37.519 --> 00:23:38.799 That boy's free. 00:23:40.400 --> 00:23:43.680 And I spread my arms out wide on the cross and I embrace him. 00:23:43.839 --> 00:23:55.759 See, this is the scandal of grace, the scandal of the sufficiency and the goodness of God known in the finished work of Jesus for a beloved bunch of beggars like us. 00:23:55.920 --> 00:23:57.279 Let's pray together. 00:23:57.599 --> 00:24:02.640 God, we come before you and we say, we just we have nothing except to beg. 00:24:05.359 --> 00:24:13.839 We are your creation that has stolen from you and ran, and we are amazed that your arms are open wide for us. 00:24:15.039 --> 00:24:19.039 Thank you that we do not have to find our value in what we produce. 00:24:19.279 --> 00:24:23.519 We do not have to find our righteousness in what we produce. 00:24:25.440 --> 00:24:30.160 Thank you that as we come together as a bunch of beggars, help us to be more honest. 00:24:30.319 --> 00:24:44.160 Help us to learn the freedom and the joy of confession that we might receive your grace in greater ways, that we might know you in greater ways, your heart, your character, the sufficiency of Jesus for us. 00:24:47.759 --> 00:24:59.119 Help us to refuse the kind of life that says, now, now this time, now that now this time, this child, this achievement, this person, this approval. 00:25:00.480 --> 00:25:10.720 Help us to come to the point that just lets you embrace us, that seeks your blessing, that seeks your love. 00:25:10.880 --> 00:25:15.359 And thank you for Jesus that makes it possible. 00:25:17.200 --> 00:25:18.160 And we pray. 00:25:18.400 --> 00:25:19.039 Amen.