WEBVTT 00:00:00.640 --> 00:00:04.000 Alright, well, we are continuing our way through the book of Colossians. 00:00:04.080 --> 00:00:09.039 If you haven't been with us, we're gonna do a little bit of review uh just to catch you up. 00:00:09.199 --> 00:00:12.160 If you're visiting, you just showed up, or you got dragged here by somebody. 00:00:12.240 --> 00:00:18.320 Um, and so the rest of you, this this will really be review because you've been hearing it for, I don't know, five, six, eight weeks at this point. 00:00:18.480 --> 00:00:24.079 Uh so chapters one and two of the book of Colossians are all these promises of God to us. 00:00:24.239 --> 00:00:36.960 They're just it's just one after the next about what God has done for us and how much he loves us and how we are beloved in his sight, not by anything that we have done by, but only by what he has done for us. 00:00:37.119 --> 00:00:41.280 And it's just chapters one and two are just full throttle promises. 00:00:41.840 --> 00:00:45.679 These are called the indicatives. 00:00:45.759 --> 00:00:46.799 Very good, three of you. 00:00:46.880 --> 00:00:47.359 That's great. 00:00:47.439 --> 00:00:48.240 We're doing great. 00:00:48.399 --> 00:00:53.520 And then at the end of chapter two, there's a shift from chapter two to chapter three, and it's pretty immediate. 00:00:53.679 --> 00:00:59.600 And you see there's a shift from these indicatives and these promises to things we should do, right? 00:00:59.759 --> 00:01:01.359 Like Christian living. 00:01:01.520 --> 00:01:04.400 And these are called the imperatives. 00:01:04.480 --> 00:01:04.959 That's better. 00:01:05.120 --> 00:01:05.519 Very good. 00:01:05.680 --> 00:01:08.079 So uh here's here's what we've been talking about. 00:01:08.319 --> 00:01:12.640 What we see in the book of Colossians is we see how the Christian life should be lived. 00:01:13.040 --> 00:01:20.239 And what we tend to do is sort of like just skip over chapters one and two, like, oh, that's how that's how I became a Christian, that's like the way in. 00:01:20.400 --> 00:01:24.959 But now I'm just going to I'm gonna live in chapters three and four. 00:01:25.040 --> 00:01:30.480 And if you do that, if you do that, you're headed down a path toward what would be called moralism or legalism. 00:01:30.640 --> 00:01:35.120 You're headed down a path that is not toward freedom and joy. 00:01:35.439 --> 00:01:51.439 And so how this works out is it works out that you live out three and four of Colossians by living in chapters one and two and rooting in and remembering and going back, and out of that route comes all these things we should do. 00:01:51.599 --> 00:01:56.480 Now, this week we're out of the landmine topics for me, so I'm feeling I feel pretty relieved. 00:01:56.640 --> 00:02:02.000 We made it through uh racial and socioeconomic different groups and how we should view each other. 00:02:02.159 --> 00:02:14.400 We made it through uh parenting roles, we made it through marriage roles, and this this week it's about how children uh should should relate up to parents. 00:02:14.560 --> 00:02:18.719 And so this isn't a landmine topic, but I I think it's a pretty sensitive one. 00:02:18.879 --> 00:02:22.000 So uh Colossians 3 verse 20. 00:02:22.400 --> 00:02:29.039 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. 00:02:29.280 --> 00:02:31.840 Now that that's pretty quick, it's pretty clear. 00:02:31.919 --> 00:02:35.919 Um Paul in Ephesians 6 he takes it and fleshes it out a little bit. 00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:38.560 So Ephesians 6 1 through 3. 00:02:38.800 --> 00:02:41.360 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:47.039 Now, children in that in that verse is talking about non-adult children, meaning kids. 00:02:47.199 --> 00:02:47.439 Right? 00:02:47.520 --> 00:02:48.960 We're all children, right? 00:02:49.439 --> 00:02:51.520 Everybody's a child to somebody. 00:02:51.919 --> 00:02:53.919 But this is talking about non-adult children. 00:02:54.000 --> 00:02:58.080 So a kid, somebody living in the house of their parent. 00:02:58.319 --> 00:03:00.400 He's saying, obey because it's right. 00:03:00.560 --> 00:03:01.199 But there's more. 00:03:01.360 --> 00:03:02.800 Paul roots this in something else. 00:03:02.879 --> 00:03:14.800 He roots it, we get to see in verse 2, honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise, so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on earth. 00:03:15.039 --> 00:03:21.680 Now, when I was 19 years old, I went to college at Barrie College my freshman year, and I transferred, at the end of that year, I transferred to Georgia. 00:03:21.759 --> 00:03:24.080 And some of you may have heard this story, it's a good story. 00:03:24.159 --> 00:03:26.240 I I'm gonna repeat the story over and over again. 00:03:26.319 --> 00:03:26.960 It's so good. 00:03:27.039 --> 00:03:38.800 But at the end of that freshman year, one day, uh a couple a couple friends, a couple girlfriends of ours, there's there's a group of guys, there's six of us, we lived on fourth Dana. 00:03:39.199 --> 00:03:45.360 So we come back from class one day, and Phil and Jeff's room is covered in rabbit food. 00:03:45.439 --> 00:03:51.520 And when I mean covered in rabbit food, I mean it's an impressive feat that's had to be wheelbearers involved. 00:03:51.599 --> 00:03:57.039 I don't I don't even know the logistics, but it is covered, floor, beds, drawers. 00:03:57.199 --> 00:03:59.039 I mean, it is unbelievable. 00:03:59.199 --> 00:04:02.960 And so we see this, the six of us, because you don't just do that, Phil and Jeff. 00:04:03.039 --> 00:04:05.360 If you do it to Phil and Jeff, you do it to all of us, right? 00:04:05.439 --> 00:04:06.560 Like we're a unit. 00:04:06.800 --> 00:04:11.120 And we go, well, this is not, this is not okay, right? 00:04:11.680 --> 00:04:17.040 This kind of thing toward us is not, this is this is horrible. 00:04:17.279 --> 00:04:21.360 And we decide we're not gonna retaliate right away. 00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:27.759 We're gonna gather ourselves, we call a pet store, we order uh a thousand crickets. 00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:30.800 This is where we should have stopped, by the way, but kids. 00:04:30.959 --> 00:04:36.399 This is where you just let things go because you've stepped into territory where you're you're you're headed down a bad path. 00:04:36.560 --> 00:04:40.560 We order a thousand crickets, we say, hey, can you just collect your dead fish for a week? 00:04:40.720 --> 00:04:53.120 So they collect their dead fish for a week, we get sand, we get wet mulch, we uh borrow a master key to the girls' dorm, dress in all black, face paint. 00:04:53.279 --> 00:04:58.560 They came into our dorm in the middle of the day, we're going into their dorm, middle of the night, while they're asleep. 00:04:58.800 --> 00:05:04.399 Thousand crickets, twenty fish, sand, wet mulch. 00:05:04.959 --> 00:05:09.439 It was awesome for us and horrible for them. 00:05:10.399 --> 00:05:12.079 So you would think that would be the end of it. 00:05:12.160 --> 00:05:16.480 But the next day I get back from class and all of my belongings are out on the lawn. 00:05:16.639 --> 00:05:18.399 Like my whole room, right? 00:05:18.560 --> 00:05:20.480 Another impressive feat for the girls. 00:05:20.720 --> 00:05:22.879 Again, this is the place you should stop. 00:05:23.040 --> 00:05:25.600 But yada yada yada, blah, blah, blah. 00:05:25.759 --> 00:05:33.199 And here we have a whole nother mission the next night, and we're taking their tires off their cars, and we're gonna chain them in a tree in front of the dining hall. 00:05:33.439 --> 00:05:40.319 You know, like it's just one after the next thing, but we're about halfway through this, and we see the cop car from the guard station, the front. 00:05:40.399 --> 00:05:43.439 It's headed down the road toward us. 00:05:44.240 --> 00:05:49.360 A couple friends take off to the field, cop car jumps the curb, chasing them through the field. 00:05:49.600 --> 00:05:57.279 Couple friends just disappear into another set of woods, and then me and another friend, we end up in in the courtyard, and we reason horribly. 00:05:57.439 --> 00:05:58.319 We're gonna leave campus. 00:05:58.399 --> 00:05:59.199 That's how we're gonna get out. 00:05:59.279 --> 00:06:02.399 And so we had stashed a car up there for whatever reason we need it. 00:06:02.560 --> 00:06:08.399 We get in the car, and we're we figure there's only one car, one cop car on campus. 00:06:08.560 --> 00:06:10.319 So we're good to leave. 00:06:10.399 --> 00:06:13.680 And so, again, right, like should have let things go a long time ago. 00:06:13.759 --> 00:06:15.199 Because you know the storyline here. 00:06:15.360 --> 00:06:19.040 We get to the guard station, and another guard just steps out of the guard station. 00:06:19.199 --> 00:06:21.759 He's like, uh, what are y'all doing? 00:06:22.079 --> 00:06:24.160 All black, face paint. 00:06:25.839 --> 00:06:27.839 Nothing, doing nothing. 00:06:28.079 --> 00:06:28.399 Right? 00:06:28.560 --> 00:06:32.560 And the whole conversation changed really, really quick. 00:06:33.120 --> 00:06:36.720 Because all of a sudden, you are authority over my life. 00:06:36.879 --> 00:06:42.480 You can ruin my life, and all of a sudden, everything just became I'll obey whatever you say. 00:06:42.560 --> 00:06:44.720 I need to get the back of the car, I'll obey. 00:06:44.879 --> 00:06:46.720 You're gonna drive me up there, I'll obey. 00:06:46.879 --> 00:06:49.120 We need to put the tires back on, I'll obey. 00:06:49.279 --> 00:06:51.199 It became obey, obey, obey. 00:06:51.279 --> 00:06:56.000 The next day, when I'm in the dean's office, it became obey, obey, obey, right? 00:06:56.160 --> 00:07:00.800 Because you have authority over me, you can ruin my life. 00:07:01.120 --> 00:07:04.160 So, lots of obedience. 00:07:05.279 --> 00:07:07.279 But I never honored them. 00:07:07.920 --> 00:07:09.279 I didn't have to honor them. 00:07:09.439 --> 00:07:12.399 See, you can you can obey without honoring. 00:07:12.480 --> 00:07:13.759 That's the point of that long story. 00:07:13.839 --> 00:07:16.319 I can find a million different points coming out of that one story. 00:07:16.480 --> 00:07:18.480 But you can obey without honoring. 00:07:18.560 --> 00:07:28.560 But see, the Christian faith calls us to something that's much deeper toward our parents, much more profound, and that's more than a self-preservation obedience. 00:07:28.720 --> 00:07:31.680 It's an obedience that comes out of honor. 00:07:33.360 --> 00:07:39.360 So, Ephesians 6, 2, Paul quotes that fifth commandment for us to honor our parents. 00:07:39.519 --> 00:07:42.480 So here's the point kids, you have to obey. 00:07:42.639 --> 00:07:52.399 You should obey your parents because all children of all ages should honor their parents. 00:07:54.079 --> 00:08:01.199 Now, what's clear, we can go ahead and put the caveat in here, is if your parents ask you to do something morally wrong, you don't have to do that. 00:08:01.360 --> 00:08:04.319 We can go ahead and say that and get that question out of the way. 00:08:04.720 --> 00:08:07.839 I don't remember my parents ever asking me to do something morally wrong. 00:08:08.160 --> 00:08:10.079 I was never faced with that. 00:08:11.680 --> 00:08:15.040 I never remember a moment that I was not loved. 00:08:15.199 --> 00:08:22.720 I mean, even in my family's own set of tragedies and difficulties, I never remember a moment not being loved. 00:08:22.879 --> 00:08:24.959 That was never in question. 00:08:26.240 --> 00:08:27.680 Some of you don't know that. 00:08:28.160 --> 00:08:29.759 Some of you don't know that. 00:08:30.079 --> 00:08:35.519 I mean, you're still wondering because dad never showed up or never showed up at your games, never showed up in your life. 00:08:35.840 --> 00:08:49.759 He never spoke those words he should have spoke, or he drank, or she drank, or he left, or she left, or because of that secret life he had or she had, or maybe you were abused, or you were called a name, or you were forgotten. 00:08:49.919 --> 00:08:52.720 Now, others of us maybe had a good family. 00:08:52.960 --> 00:09:00.639 But you were just always sort of, look, you go, I was always fifth or sixth on the list of important things to do that day. 00:09:00.879 --> 00:09:02.639 And you you just you knew it. 00:09:02.879 --> 00:09:04.960 You were never quite enough. 00:09:05.840 --> 00:09:11.600 Or maybe you were overly hounded, overly shielded, overly protected. 00:09:12.480 --> 00:09:15.279 Maybe you came out of a great family, right? 00:09:15.360 --> 00:09:17.279 Like you have a few scars. 00:09:19.200 --> 00:09:22.879 But even then, you may not agree with all their advice. 00:09:23.840 --> 00:09:29.360 You may not agree with their lives, you may not agree with what feels like their judgment toward you. 00:09:29.840 --> 00:09:30.159 Right? 00:09:30.240 --> 00:09:33.919 And it's easy to think, how could I honor them? 00:09:35.519 --> 00:09:39.360 You can get your mind to obey them, but how could I honor them? 00:09:41.440 --> 00:09:48.240 And the answer, the answer, it just always begins with grace and forgiveness toward them. 00:09:49.440 --> 00:09:50.720 There's no other way. 00:09:51.440 --> 00:09:53.440 So, what does the fifth commandment actually say? 00:09:53.840 --> 00:09:55.840 Well, that word honor is a Hebrew word. 00:09:56.080 --> 00:09:58.159 It's basically the word glorify. 00:09:59.440 --> 00:10:03.679 It means we attach value to our parents. 00:10:04.320 --> 00:10:07.360 It means we care for them and provide for them. 00:10:08.320 --> 00:10:12.960 And as you age and as they age, right, they're gonna be in the way. 00:10:13.200 --> 00:10:14.879 They're not gonna understand everything. 00:10:15.200 --> 00:10:18.080 It might slow you up, they're gonna take your time. 00:10:18.879 --> 00:10:27.679 But it's a decision to treat them with dignity and long-term loyalty to their good. 00:10:28.879 --> 00:10:29.200 Right? 00:10:29.279 --> 00:10:30.639 That's what it means to honor. 00:10:30.720 --> 00:10:35.519 It's a decision to treat them with dignity and long-term loyalty to their good. 00:10:35.759 --> 00:10:38.080 It doesn't mean they have to live in your den. 00:10:39.679 --> 00:10:43.200 It doesn't mean you have to build a bedroom on the back of your house. 00:10:43.759 --> 00:10:44.799 Maybe, I don't know. 00:10:44.879 --> 00:10:46.240 But it doesn't mean that. 00:10:47.519 --> 00:10:52.720 But it means that if they will receive your help, that you help them. 00:10:54.399 --> 00:10:58.399 Now, maybe your parents aren't admirable. 00:10:59.120 --> 00:11:02.159 Maybe your parents aren't trustworthy. 00:11:03.039 --> 00:11:03.679 Right? 00:11:05.600 --> 00:11:12.480 I mean, hopefully, if you're a kid here, um hopefully your parents sit next to you is that somewhat, on some level. 00:11:13.200 --> 00:11:18.399 But all parents aren't, you know, uh June and Ward Cleaver, Jim and Cindy Walsh. 00:11:18.559 --> 00:11:19.519 Anybody, another reference? 00:11:19.679 --> 00:11:20.639 Anyone with me? 00:11:20.879 --> 00:11:22.559 You're my age, is what that means. 00:11:22.720 --> 00:11:25.919 Uh uh all parents aren't Mike and Cindy Brady, right? 00:11:26.000 --> 00:11:51.200 Like you're like you're you're you're watching the show and you see these parents, they love each other perfectly, they listen to each other, they instruct their children, they love their children, they listen to their children, the children are so important to them, important to the family, and then you look over to dad in the recliner, and he hasn't spoken to you yet today, and he's stressed out, and there's tension between dad and mom, and you go, uh, honor? 00:11:51.600 --> 00:11:52.720 Like, I'm not. 00:11:55.759 --> 00:11:58.799 But the thing on the TV is just a is it's a it's a show, right? 00:11:58.879 --> 00:12:02.559 Like Mike and Carol Brady in real life is a totally different story. 00:12:03.039 --> 00:12:04.000 And here's my point. 00:12:04.240 --> 00:12:07.600 You probably won't admire everything about your parents. 00:12:09.840 --> 00:12:12.799 And what that means is you'll eventually see them as people. 00:12:14.000 --> 00:12:15.120 Like you are. 00:12:16.639 --> 00:12:20.720 See, but the call isn't for you to admire them. 00:12:21.440 --> 00:12:25.840 It isn't even for you to trust them because maybe they're not trustworthy. 00:12:27.600 --> 00:12:34.639 But you can honor them even if you never admire them, and even if you never can trust them. 00:12:35.279 --> 00:12:37.679 Right now I'm watching my mom care for my granny. 00:12:38.000 --> 00:12:40.080 My granny's about 92 years old, 92 or 93. 00:12:40.159 --> 00:12:41.440 I can't, she's 92 or 93. 00:12:41.840 --> 00:12:42.639 92, great. 00:12:42.799 --> 00:12:44.480 All right, so she's 92 years old. 00:12:44.639 --> 00:12:51.919 And my mom, who is 64, uh, she is now parenting her mother. 00:12:52.399 --> 00:12:52.799 Right? 00:12:53.440 --> 00:12:58.240 My granny lives in assisted living, and we're fortunate she can be there and they help take care of her. 00:12:58.320 --> 00:13:02.960 But my mom, you know, takes her mail, deals with all her finances, makes all the decisions. 00:13:03.120 --> 00:13:07.919 Uh my grandmother is is losing her memory, so she can't remember everything, which is frustrating to her. 00:13:08.000 --> 00:13:09.360 It's frustrating to my mom. 00:13:09.519 --> 00:13:16.480 Um, you know, my mom takes her to get her hair done, which is often, but she goes and gets it set, you know what I'm talking about under the big thing, helmet. 00:13:18.399 --> 00:13:27.519 And I'm just watching my mom do this, and it takes time, and it can be a nuisance, and the world says move on. 00:13:27.759 --> 00:13:28.720 Give them a TV. 00:13:28.960 --> 00:13:32.720 Like get them set up, just and then you can move on. 00:13:33.840 --> 00:13:35.840 They can play bingo in the lobby. 00:13:35.919 --> 00:13:41.360 But Christianity offers something different for us as we age. 00:13:41.759 --> 00:13:44.480 Because what it says is children honor them. 00:13:45.519 --> 00:13:46.559 Honor them. 00:13:47.519 --> 00:13:50.240 Right, and there's a second part to that, Exodus 20, 12. 00:13:50.399 --> 00:13:57.039 As you honor your parents, here's what that promises that you're gonna live in good conscience and peace toward them, at least on your side. 00:13:57.200 --> 00:14:02.080 No matter what they did toward you, you can live in good conscience and peace toward them. 00:14:03.120 --> 00:14:05.120 And your children see this. 00:14:05.519 --> 00:14:05.759 Right? 00:14:05.919 --> 00:14:09.919 Like I'm watching my mom do this, and you know, you know what it's teaching me? 00:14:10.080 --> 00:14:14.720 It's teaching me how to do this for her and how to do this for my dad. 00:14:17.200 --> 00:14:18.399 So let's kind of be clear. 00:14:18.480 --> 00:14:19.039 Let's break it down. 00:14:19.360 --> 00:14:20.000 How do we do this? 00:14:20.080 --> 00:14:25.120 Well, as kids, we honor and we obey, we cooperate in the family. 00:14:25.200 --> 00:14:27.279 So what we're called to do is what we should do. 00:14:27.600 --> 00:14:32.080 We give respect, we esteem them, we obey them, as long as it's not morally wrong. 00:14:32.320 --> 00:14:36.799 But man, it's easy as a kid to just say, you know what, they really don't know what's best for me. 00:14:36.879 --> 00:14:39.360 They don't understand me, they don't understand my world. 00:14:40.159 --> 00:14:41.440 Or maybe you just say, I don't care. 00:14:41.519 --> 00:14:43.120 It's just sort of like blatant rebellion. 00:14:43.200 --> 00:14:44.639 And what you're doing, you don't realize it. 00:14:44.720 --> 00:14:48.960 What you're doing, you're shooting yourself in the foot and then blaming your parents for the pain. 00:14:50.159 --> 00:14:51.279 You don't see it at that. 00:14:51.360 --> 00:14:54.000 I hope you see it at that eventually, but that's what you're doing. 00:14:54.240 --> 00:14:58.080 Shooting yourself in the foot and then getting it angry at your parent. 00:14:59.840 --> 00:15:01.600 Then as we grow, we become adults. 00:15:01.759 --> 00:15:05.039 Honoring is about leaving our parents but not disowning them. 00:15:05.279 --> 00:15:06.399 I didn't do well at this. 00:15:06.480 --> 00:15:13.039 I mean, I think that freshman year where I went to when I went to Barrie, I I I can't remember the amount of times I called home. 00:15:13.519 --> 00:15:14.639 Not a lot. 00:15:15.600 --> 00:15:18.399 I I I've gotten better at it lately. 00:15:18.639 --> 00:15:20.399 Christy helps a lot. 00:15:22.080 --> 00:15:26.960 I mean, this is a whole realm for me to I can I can do I can do a lot better here. 00:15:29.039 --> 00:15:43.840 But to remember them, to to to include them, to to let them see a little bit of them in you, to thank them for something uh that they gave you, that doesn't mean you're condoning all the bad. 00:15:44.480 --> 00:15:46.080 But that's part of honoring. 00:15:47.840 --> 00:15:56.000 And then we become adults and we know about 401ks and PMI insurance and strollers and 529 plans, and we know about our own kids moving out. 00:15:56.480 --> 00:16:01.200 We know about them getting older, and we know about grandchildren. 00:16:02.399 --> 00:16:08.879 Last week, Christy and I came in from a date, and uh we had gone to see Selma, and so afterwards we're just we're talking, right? 00:16:09.039 --> 00:16:21.279 Lots of discussion after that movie, and so we come back in, and my mom grew up in Atlanta in the 50s and the 60s, and so we came home and I was just like, Mom, what you know, what was life like in the 50s and 60s growing up? 00:16:21.440 --> 00:16:22.399 What do you remember? 00:16:22.559 --> 00:16:24.080 And and she was she was just honest. 00:16:24.159 --> 00:16:25.279 She's like, I don't remember much. 00:16:25.360 --> 00:16:28.240 I lived in my little white world, and and that was it. 00:16:28.399 --> 00:16:30.159 I don't remember anything else. 00:16:30.320 --> 00:16:54.399 And somehow the conversation went from that to uh that my grandfather was an alcoholic for a season, which is crazy to me because the grandfather I knew was so loving and gentle and um never saw a drink in his hand, but he was an alcoholic for a season, and so my mom started talking about that, and then Christy, thank you, Christy, she asked, Hey, what are the most what are the most devastating moments of your life that y'all remember? 00:16:54.559 --> 00:17:20.720 And I'm like, great discussion, you know, it's 10 PM, um appreciate this, and so we're but we we're we're buying into it and we're talking and we're you know like crying, Christy's counseling, and you know, and we we script my mom I walked my mom out to her car, and um somehow we had started talking about parenting a little bit, the conversation transferred, and and I just said and I don't say it enough, I said, Mom, you did a really good job. 00:17:21.759 --> 00:17:22.160 Right? 00:17:22.319 --> 00:17:25.200 Like it just one sentence. 00:17:25.519 --> 00:17:28.559 And I I don't know, like it's not like it was some huge moment. 00:17:28.640 --> 00:17:38.640 I don't know if it was life-changing for her or not, but um man, I can't imagine that when I'm 64, I have my one of my kids just say, Dad, you did a really good job. 00:17:38.799 --> 00:17:43.680 I mean, how much that would fill my heart and honor me. 00:17:44.559 --> 00:17:45.599 Here's what we see. 00:17:45.759 --> 00:17:48.559 Here's what we see as we get into this, this idea of honor your parents. 00:17:48.720 --> 00:17:55.359 What we do see is we see it breaks us as much as it questions how honorable our parents are. 00:17:56.079 --> 00:18:04.559 Because you get to this fifth commandment, if you read the four in front of it, you read the you know, the um the five after it, uh, did I do the math right? 00:18:04.720 --> 00:18:09.759 The the four in front of it, the four after the five after it, four in front of it, the five after it. 00:18:09.920 --> 00:18:15.920 The ten commandments, not just a guide, but of the these laws, they break you. 00:18:16.240 --> 00:18:20.319 You go, ah, not me, not doing that well, not doing that one, not doing that one well, not doing that. 00:18:20.480 --> 00:18:30.160 And what we see with this is we see, not only are our parents not perfectly honorable, we see we are not perfectly able to honor them. 00:18:33.920 --> 00:18:36.640 So we're also not perfectly honorable. 00:18:36.720 --> 00:18:40.480 We're not perfectly honorable as parents, as children, as people. 00:18:41.839 --> 00:18:43.680 And the gospel is this. 00:18:43.839 --> 00:18:46.400 This is the difference between the law and the gospel. 00:18:46.880 --> 00:18:55.759 What we see in the gospel when God comes to rescue us from trying to live up to the law is we see Jesus was perfectly honorable for us. 00:18:58.000 --> 00:19:01.200 See, all our imperfections and our sin are put on Jesus on the cross. 00:19:01.359 --> 00:19:04.720 His righteousness and honor is given to you. 00:19:05.039 --> 00:19:13.599 Jesus was the perfectly honorable son to the perfectly honorable father for you. 00:19:14.960 --> 00:19:16.720 So you're in the family. 00:19:17.039 --> 00:19:24.319 This is a different family than you grew up in, whether it was that family that was, you know, manipulative and destructive, or whether it's a good family or a great family. 00:19:24.480 --> 00:19:32.720 You're in a new family, in a family that has a perfect father with perfect love that is not conditioned upon anything. 00:19:33.759 --> 00:19:37.119 And we are sons and daughters to this father. 00:19:37.519 --> 00:19:39.200 Listen to this, and I'll kind of tie it all together. 00:19:39.359 --> 00:19:41.200 Romans 8, 15 through 17. 00:19:41.440 --> 00:19:47.119 The spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again. 00:19:48.000 --> 00:19:53.279 Rather, the spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. 00:19:53.440 --> 00:20:00.960 And by him we cry, Abba Father, the Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. 00:20:01.279 --> 00:20:04.240 Now, if we are children, then we're heirs. 00:20:04.480 --> 00:20:11.920 Heirs of God, co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings, in order that we may also share in his glory. 00:20:12.240 --> 00:20:15.839 See, one day, my three little girls, they're gonna see me for what I am. 00:20:16.480 --> 00:20:18.640 They're already starting to see it, the six-year-old is. 00:20:19.039 --> 00:20:24.559 And they will have to stop trying to get all of my affirmation. 00:20:25.839 --> 00:20:29.599 And they're gonna have to start to receive this from God. 00:20:30.400 --> 00:20:38.400 And if they don't, they're headed down a path of frustration and burden because I will not live up to that. 00:20:38.640 --> 00:20:41.279 I am not perfectly honorable. 00:20:43.039 --> 00:20:44.640 And then they're free, right? 00:20:44.799 --> 00:20:46.400 Like then they're free. 00:20:47.200 --> 00:20:48.160 Do you see this? 00:20:48.319 --> 00:20:48.960 Do you see it? 00:20:49.119 --> 00:20:50.319 Do you do you know this? 00:20:50.480 --> 00:21:01.519 Because if we know this love, this new greater family, then we can give our parents the freedom to just be people. 00:21:03.759 --> 00:21:14.559 You can stop being controlled by their constant approval and affirmation, or or constantly being controlled by their judgments, or being controlled by the lack of any of that. 00:21:15.759 --> 00:21:20.799 See, you can be free to honor them with your own identity. 00:21:21.440 --> 00:21:26.079 You can be free to listen to them and not agree and smile. 00:21:27.759 --> 00:21:34.480 You can be free to honor them with as many boundaries as you need in your family. 00:21:35.440 --> 00:21:43.359 You can be free to forgive the past and still give a compliment to them about something good they gave to you. 00:21:45.599 --> 00:22:01.039 So you can only allow them to return to be imperfect people as you live in the perfect family and begin to receive the affirmation and the acceptance you need from the perfect father. 00:22:02.720 --> 00:22:10.000 And that we would know this unconditional love that God gives it to us in Jesus. 00:22:11.119 --> 00:22:12.400 Jesus is enough. 00:22:13.200 --> 00:22:16.799 That means that you are free from your parents.