The Art of Badassery with Jenn Cassetta: Mindset, Motivation and Empowerment for Women

45 | Audacious Expansion: How Erika Rothenberger Turned Life’s Punches into Opportunities

• Jenn Cassetta • Season 1 • Episode 45

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What if the most terrifying moment of your life became the driving force behind your greatest mission?


In this episode of the Art of Badassery podcast, host Jenn Cassetta sits down with Erica Rothenberger—a powerhouse leader, director of performance systems, and founder of women’s empowerment networks—who turned a violent attack in 2022 into a call to action. Erica opens up about her journey of resilience, mental health advocacy, and building connection after trauma, while sharing details about her new book Audacious Expansion and the upcoming Audacious Woman Summit. This powerful conversation reveals how personal tragedy can ignite purpose and inspire change for others.


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SPEAKER_01

Hi there, I'm Den Cassetta, your Chief Badasserie Officer. If you're feeling drained, hesitant, stuck in self-doubt, or you just have a case of the vlogs, the Art of Badass 3 podcast is here to help you unleash your mojo once and for all. We'll provide you with tips, techniques, and real-life examples of how you can kick ass in all areas of your life. You'll learn how to flex your mental muscles, rise above fears, and turn setbacks into superpowers. So let's enter the dojo and let's get to work. Welcome everyone to the Art of Badassery podcast. I'm Jen Cassetta, your chief badassy officer. And today I have a very special guest. Someone with so much energy, it's gonna feel like she's right there with you. In your car when you're listening, or if you're on your walk or wherever you are. Erica Rothenberger is her name, and she is a dynamic leader and director of performance systems at Henkles and McCoy. She holds degrees in civil engineering and an MBA from Villanova. Erica's the founder of two women's empowerment networks, serves on multiple charity boards, mentors women in the greater Philadelphia area, and she's also a published author, podcast host, keynote speaker, and entrepreneur in real estate and wellness, recognized with several leadership awards. Erica's passionate advocate for domestic violence awareness. She lives in PA with her husband and two children, enjoying travel, fitness, and family time. Welcome to the show, Erica.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, I was so excited to be here. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Thank you. And I always like to share how I curate these amazing women that grace my show with their presence. And Erica invited me on her podcast, I don't know, about a year or so ago. So I've been following her journey, and she has some really exciting things coming up that I want her to share about. So yeah, thanks for coming on.

SPEAKER_00

Absolutely. I think you need to bring the episode up from Girk Grace and Glitz back to the top and bring that back up again because that was a great episode.

SPEAKER_01

Awesome. We do have something in common, and it I believe it starts with women's safety. So, everyone out there, I just want to give you a little trigger warning that Erica's gonna share something really personal with us about a really difficult time, which has been what it seems like, the catalyst for all of this amazing work that she does. Erica, can you share with the audience what happened to you? I just listened to your TEDx talk, so I know the details and really take us there. Where were you when this happened and what happened?

SPEAKER_00

Absolutely. Before I dive into it, Jeffrey, I just want to thank you for giving me this platform to be able to share this. And really, it's been part of my healing process. But before I even go there, I want to remind anyone that's listening to this, we've all had some sort of punch in our life. And as I share the punch that happened to me physically, we've all had times in our life that we've gone through things. And whether we found out about a cancer diagnosis or whether we've had a child that's been terminally ill or we've lost a parent, everyone has had something. And this is part of my tapestry, part of my story. But I never want to negate that everyone listening right now, I know has their own story too. And it was never gonna happen to me though. I was like, listen, I was this badassery, right? Like I was this woman who taught kickboxing, went to the gym every day. And what I'm gonna about to share with you in my mind was never gonna happen. And it was back in June of 2022. And I it was a typical day. It was June 16th. I was headed to work. My husband was in Kansas City, two kids were with the sitter, and I drove to work the exact same way that I always did. I remember leaving my kids a message right before I got to the office at a red light, telling them to have the most fabulous day. I remember pulling into that parking lot and taking that last sib of Himalayan sea salt water, the one that was supposed to give you the dewy skin they told you on Instagram to make you look glowy. And I don't know if it's working or not, but it seemed like a good idea. And as I went to go gather all of my things in this beautiful town outside of Philadelphia, very safe area where it worked for 10 years, I opened my car door and there he was. It was a man I had never seen before. And I thought maybe he was lost. And I asked him, Sir, can I help you? And as that last word came out of my mouth, he didn't respond, but he did respond by punching me straight in the face, by grabbing my hair and throwing me out of that car like a rag doll, by throwing me to that concrete pavement and proceeding to punch me four, five, six more times. And at that point, Jennifer, I wasn't even counting. I was doing everything to stay alive. I was kicking, I was screaming, I felt the saliva, the blood, the tears that pour up running through every ounce of my body.

SPEAKER_01

You were driving to work, you parked in, you just parked in the parking lot, you opened the door, and there he was, and there's some it just starts punching you out of nowhere.

SPEAKER_00

In a normal day, I'd parked there probably 2,600 times over the last 10 years of going to work, parking in the same place, feeling really safe and situationally, out of awareness, never saw him. It was 10 o'clock in the morning. Right. And there was no one else in that parking lot. I would come from another meeting. Okay. And I always think about that day. It's like the Gwyneth Paltrell movie of sliding doors. That morning, I replayed it obviously so many times after things like that happened that if I hadn't gone to that coffee meeting, if I hadn't pushed back my 10 o'clock to 10:15, if I hadn't stopped at that red light to send my kids that message, what it would that day have looked differently. We can play those type of scenarios so many times in our heads. And that's when I just recall thinking in that moment, is this the last moment that I'll be here? Wow. What some people don't know is this man had actually been in prison for 12 years in New York for smuggling drugs from New York to Pennsylvania. Wow. Unbeknownst to me, obviously at the time, he and also assaulted five prison guards while he was in jail and got out prematurely. He made it down to Philadelphia the night before on June 15th. He had assaulted four women on the streets of Philadelphia and they couldn't catch him. The next morning, the morning of my incident, he had actually got back on a local bus. A woman on the outskirts of Philadelphia, he got off the bus as she was walking into a restaurant shift, pushed her in a vestibule, and actually raped her and took her phone. Oh my God. Got back on the bus, stopped at a stop right before where I didn't even know there was a bus stop, to be honest with you, outside of my office building. Stopped at a adjacent bus stop, changed his clothes in a drop box where they'd take donations. Got back on the bus, and that's when my incident occurred. And so as I kicked, as I screamed, as I the horror went through every ounce of my body. He didn't like that I was biting and fighting back. And for someone who has done a lot of kickboxing, who is really prides herself on being actively fit and keeping up with my routine of mental and physical wellness, I was not gonna go down that way. And that's when I saw the crease of his elbow come under my neck. And I knew at that moment that what could have been that last moment. And right before he squeezed, I remember just praying that Drew and Adeline, at the time my six and eight-year-old, were gonna be okay. At that moment, that was my last breath in my that those quick couple seconds that it happened. And proceeded to squeeze as hard as he could until I passed out. Thankfully, to the universe, to the act of someone way higher than myself, I was able, approximately 45 seconds later, I was able to come back to consciousness right before the level where there could have started to be some damage and further altercations that could have occurred. And I got to my feet. And I remember just not knowing exactly where I was, feeling so disoriented. But also the adrenaline and everything allowed me to run for help and run into that office building. And as I looked over my shoulder, he was sitting in my car. And knowing that he could have taken my car. And that's really, as we have gone through the entire trial, really understanding that it was probably his attempt to get out of Dodge and to get off that bus and to get somewhere. And luckily, he couldn't find the start button. Wow. Ended up fleeing by feet. And I ended up walking running into that office building and screaming at the top of my lungs, I need help, I need help. And that is when the next 48 hours really became an utter blur between detectives' trauma, being rushed to the hospital, police reports. The man had fled by foot. They actually had caught him by drones and dogs. He was burying himself locally to the to my office building. And they had found him burying himself with the phone of the woman had raped. Hold on, sorry. Burying himself? Yes, like trying to hide. So bury burying himself out of the marshes. Got it. Oh my god. Yeah. And they were so worried about my condition that they took me straight to trauma that I was not able to go and identify him at that point, which didn't necessarily help my trial because there was no cameras on my building. Really? And no one else witnessed it. Now, luckily, all of my blood was the DNA that came up off of his clothing, which helped. And I was able to identify the yellow shirt, the avatar shirt and the bright yellow sunglasses, and all of it was able to come together. But I will tell you, it was a moment that changed my life forever.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

A moment that really has brought so much goodness to as crazy as that sounds.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, I get it. And honestly, that's why you are a black belt and badassery, because a black belt and badassery, everyone's heard this a million times now, is someone who has been through really tough challenges and then overcomes them and then helps others with that message. So that is precisely why I've I've invited you on the show. But can we go back to the chokehold? The crease of the elbow is around your neck. That moment is, first of all, must have been absolutely terrifying. You said you thought this was it. Suddenly you're 45 seconds later, you're on your feet. So what do you think? Even if you blacked out and don't remember it, what do you think happened in those 45 seconds? What are your thoughts?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, so my thoughts and just recollections and replaying that moment so many times. And I will tell you, I remember, like I will to this day remember the feeling. I thought for a moment I was actually laying in my bed, and I just remember seeing all of these colors going through like my mind and feeling like I had an elephant on my chest. It was almost like an out-of-body experience. And it may have been. Yeah, it may have been. I'll never know because I was again 45 seconds. It sounds like a short period of time, but it's a long time to be completely blacked out.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. And I just want to share with folks, because this is something I teach. And again, I am so aware that when I teach self-defense techniques, I know that what happens when you're attacked, all of that could go out of the window. So I never teach thinking that someone is absolutely going to remember these techniques when they need the most, but it's still important to know. So a couple things I would just point out. Again, you were blacked out, you couldn't do anything, but can you use your mouth? Can you bite that elbow? Can you bite that arm? And also there's a little technique that I love to teach. And every time I teach a self-defense class and I ask what their favorite takeaway is, it's always this, the turtle. And essentially, if you're ever being choked out, and if you're watching the video, you can see me do it here, but I'll walk you through it if you're just listening. Think about taking your chin to your chest and your shoulders to your ears, chin to your chest and elbows to the ears. And what that does is open up a little bit of space around your trachea that hopefully, again, that you will be able to at least breathe for a few more seconds, maybe to not get choked out, maybe to be able to fight back again. All of that is like, who knows what's gonna happen.

SPEAKER_00

But and what I didn't share with you, Jennifer, I was biting, I was kicking, I was screaming scratching, I was doing everything I could to just stay as violent as possible. And obviously the adrenaline was running in. What I didn't know until after the fact, obviously, was this man actually had you had been an Xboxer. Yeah. So he had a skill set that was above and beyond what most know. He knew exactly what he was doing.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. And I just want to again point out what you said. You kicked, you screamed, you bit, you dug your nails in, all of those things. It's just like fighting like hell. That's the best technique, is fighting like hell. Like all of a sudden, you are attacking your attacker. And that's the mindset that I need everyone out there to really seep in from this.

SPEAKER_00

And if I were even to take it back, it was the situational awareness before getting out of my car and looking at all the mirrors, just the basic things that I'm in a in most incidents. Why do they say most accidents happen within five miles of your house? Because we become comfortable, become complacent. And it was a place again, I had parked 2,600 times that I was like, wow, like it's not gonna happen here. Yeah, it's gonna happen in downtown Philly or at a construction job site or somewhere else that I'm in a precarious situation. And that's usually when our spidey sense is actually up.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Yeah. It's not when we're closes to home. You're so right. Okay, so this horrible incident happens. And now what? Can you walk us through, I guess, either what happens after, how do you heal? Because I know you talked about that a lot in your TEDx talk.

SPEAKER_00

Yes. Again, the next 48 to 72 hours, total blur, just being in the hospital, test, all of the things. And then I always say, listen, when the adrenaline finally wore off a few days later, after all of this, and recognizing that there was gonna be a long battle ahead. And one of the first things that I knew I needed to do was to get some mental help from it, a professional. Like I needed to find someone that understood trauma and could really help get my mind set in the right place. I knew the longer I let it go, and I will tell you, those first couple of weeks were really petrifying, like leaving my house doing this. But I think one of the biggest, two big catalysts. One within a few days after I remember sitting in my gazebo, and it was the middle of June. I was in a big hoodie sweatshirt. I just remember the tears dripping down my face. I actually still have a video of it, and I've rewatched it several times. And I remembering hearing the giggling of my kids in my pool. And at that point, they were that it wasn't the doctors, it wasn't the nurses, it wasn't the police. It was the connection with my children, the connection of my friends who drove hundreds of miles to sit by my side. It was my sister being the first person at the hospital. It was really realizing that was what's gonna was gonna be my oxygen to bring me back to life. And that I needed to rely. I'm one that I can do it on my own. I really needed to be willing to rely on others to help me with that connection and then to make sure that I got professional help. And then I'll be honest with you, and again, this isn't for everyone, but for myself, it worked well, is matriculating myself back into normal life as quickly as possible. Five days later, I actually walked back in that office building. Okay. We're like, and that's not for everyone, but for me, it was facing, okay, listen, I'm gonna just get back into the swing of things. And now I say that out loud, and it sounds almost like bizarre that I did it that soon. But at the same time, that's partly what worked for me. And then lastly, it was sharing my story, deciding to go speak on it, deciding to use it to serve others and other people who have punches because all of you listening right now, you've had a punch and use my punch as a catalyst to whatever you're dealing with right now to say, okay, what are some things that I can be doing to overcome those obstacles because they're gonna happen. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when.

SPEAKER_01

Absolutely. In fact, you mentioned a statistic in there, which I agree with you, I bet is much higher, but 70% of all Americans face at least one trauma in their lifetime. Again, I feel like everyone has had some kind of trauma. Uh again, varying degrees of trauma, of course, but there's mental, emotional, physical. Everyone out there has had their deal of their, yeah, their hand of punches.

SPEAKER_00

Yes. And many of us, several of them, right? And there's a lot of women. The reason that I really fortunately there there isn't any associations that have been set up for random violence, which is really what my case was. I didn't know this person, but there is a lot of cases for domestic violence. And women who are strangled for a second time are 78% more likely to actually die if it happens for a second time. Really?

SPEAKER_01

From strangulation. And why is that physically or just because they're in a pattern now? In a pattern now. Okay.

SPEAKER_00

Now it's become like just part of the way of the lifestyle. And some point they're not gonna get out of it.

SPEAKER_01

One in four, I believe, women have experienced domestic violence here in the States. That's a big number of 25%. So where does your advocacy come in? Like, how did that happen after this trauma that you get?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and I always say, listen, you hear about all these stories, whether it's someone like who started a cancer foundation or someone that started a big charity run because of something else that had happened. And really a catalyst for change of saying, hey, listen, I can take my situation. And that day that I was sitting in that gazebo, I wanted to be a victim. I wanted to stay in that hoodie and cry and stay at home and forget about life for a long time. And yet again, there was the catalyst. And it wasn't that day I got up and was like, I'm gonna be an advocate, but it was the catalyst for me to say, okay, listen, I can take this setback and turn it into a setup for someone else. I can take this obstacle and turn it into an opportunity. I have a choice of what I want to do with this. I always say, regardless of where I am in life, and this could be something as simple as not wanting to go to the gym or something as complicated as what I'm talking about, but action triumphs anything. When you just start doing something, just creating change in your life. And maybe it's, hey, I'm gonna take that half mile walk today, just lacing up your sneakers and physically going and accomplishing that. And to me, it was who can I help because of this? How can I be that light? And I knew that was gonna help. Like that again, making those meaningful connections was gonna help bring me back to life. And hearing the stories that have come back tenfold to me of your story changed me is enough to like just make me want to continue to do it.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, absolutely. Where do you get those messages from? Do you hear from a lot of survivors of domestic violence?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. After I share a podcast like this, I'll have people that will reach out to me, or I'll have someone that will say, Hey, listen, I've had a punch. It wasn't a physical punch like you endured, but it was this punch in my life, or after a keynote that I give. What I also recognize too, all of this time, Jennifer, what it actually opened also for myself is sometimes when something so traumatic happens, it makes us realize how precious life is. We have something that's truly life-changing. And to me, I always thought I was living this big, bold, brave, audacious life. And what I recognized is I was really plain, really small. And I recognized that day, if that was the last day that I was supposed to be on this earth and the last day I was supposed to be the mom to driven Adeline or the wife to Andrew. Did I give the world everything that it deserved in myself? And what I recognized, again, through a lot of therapy and a lot of time, no, and that's what really opened me up to say, I am audaciously expanding, but you just never know.

SPEAKER_01

Amazing. Audaciously expanding. I love that.

SPEAKER_00

And that's the name of my book, Audacious Expansions. Is that it? Audacious Expansion, yeah. Okay, I love it.

SPEAKER_01

So your book is coming out when? In January of 2026. Wonderful. And you also have something really cool coming up in the fall. Can you share?

SPEAKER_00

Yes. And really, it is. It's going back to the point that I made about connection. And I truly believe we can do so little alone. We can do so much together. And I would not be on a podcast like this. I would not be speaking. I would not be doing what I was doing if it weren't for women like yourself and so many others who have been that meaningful connection. I truly believe when we come together, we can be so powerful and we can next level that amplification of who we are and how we show up. So I'm hosting an Audacious Woman Summit on October 17th, 2025. And it was been on my heart for the last year. And I finally found the location and the place, and I was like, I don't know. Exactly how this is all going to come together. But I said yes to it and I've leaned in ever since. And we're almost sold out and we have sponsorship. And it's just going to be a day that is going to next level, up level, and really allow us all to walk away with those audacious actions that we're willing to take. And some of those it may be lacing up the sneaker. Others of us may be jumping on that stage, writing that book, or maybe just walking out of there and making a new connection. And I want to remind you that audacious, I always people hear the word, they think it needs to be this big, huge goal. And I said, no, it's sometimes the audacious goals are the little goals that you're doing every day that are going to lead you to that bigger goal.

SPEAKER_01

I just want to say that is so impressive to me because again, I have so many goals. The retreat was one of the biggest ones on my heart, like you said, but that had been on my heart for 15 years. When you just said, Oh, I had it on my heart for a year, and I was like, and damn, she made it happen that quick. Like you really, you really walked the talk of this women's empowerment, right? I know that even that term has become kind of cliche and some people hated, but I don't know of another word that truly embodies that, right? Other women rise. That is truly a word, empowerment. And it's not that you're empowering them, you help people empower themselves. So what is the you had three steps in your TEDx talk about audacious resilience.

SPEAKER_00

Ah, so I have the audacity to be resilient. The first part of that is really working on yourself every day, right? We have to work on ourselves every day. To your point, we can empower everyone that we want, but if they're not willing to do the work, right? It's just like someone that's gone through a bad vice, right? Like they could be an alcoholic. If they don't want to make the change, they're not gonna do it no matter what you give them, what no matter what platform you put in front of them, what training you put in front of them. So you need to want to do it. But that really comes from doing that inner work every day. And what I recognized through this whole incident was because I had been doing that work. I'd been planting those seeds for years and years and reading the books and journaling. I was ready for this incident to happen. Not that you're ever prepared, but there was a lot of work that I subconsciously was doing.

SPEAKER_01

Wow, that's a powerful way to look at that. And we're preparing for that, that knockdown, essentially.

SPEAKER_00

And that's what I was like going back to what I said, we're all gonna have the punch. It's gonna happen if you haven't had a punch yet. Like, it's probably gonna happen. So, what are you doing right now to prepare for it? What are you doing to build yourself? So when that muscle of resilience, and I truly believe it's something you need to flex and you need to use and you need to build every day. So when the punch does happen, you're more prepared for it. And I'm not gonna say it's gonna be easy, right? Because that's the hardest part sometimes, right? The wounds and the scratches and the bruises went away. But after that went away, the part that was there was still between my two earlobes. It was all in my head. And your heart. Yeah, my heart, right? Yeah. And so the second one is really leaning into the pain, right? We all have pain and we all have, and if we just keep sweeping it under the rug, and there was a part of me that was like, maybe I just don't say anything, maybe I don't post anything, maybe I just let this go, I deal with this. And there was something within me that said, I need to lean in because what I recognized is I really need to lean into that fire. And as hard as it was to lean in, I realized either the fire was gonna burn within me or it's gonna burn around me. And if I didn't lean into it and start talking about it and want to make a change, I recognized that I was gonna, it was at some point, it was gonna come out. And trauma, just like water, has a really sneaky way of sneaking out when we least want it to sneak out if you don't deal with it. And I think so many people that have been had trauma in their life, they try to stuff it down and repress it and forget about it. And I'll put it in this little Pandora's box. And then at some point it's gonna come out in a way you're not gonna want that you don't want. Yeah. And what I'm also recognized, Jen, with that whole thing is that I also realized how much trauma I had repressed and pushed down. I'll never forget my first therapy session, not the therapist that I'm still with now. She had me do an activity where I had to draw a house. And it was so weird. I'm like, listen, this massive incident just happened to me. Why is she asking me to draw this house? But the whole moral of the story is she asked me to describe the basement. And I was like, it's dark, it's dingy, it's dirty. And I promise you, my basement is not dark, dingy, or dirty. It is a little, I do have a lot of stuff down there, especially in the back section. So I'd be lying to you to say it's perfectly organized. But what I recognized is when we actually went through the whole exercise, she reminded me that was my past. That I had pushed down so many things that I needed to deal with to work on this trunk.

SPEAKER_01

Wow.

SPEAKER_00

And it was, I'll never forget that session.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, that's amazing. So we all need to clean out our basements and figuratively.

SPEAKER_00

Your garage. And then the last thing is, and I had touched upon this before, is really be the line. And at the end of one of the keynote, the Audacity Be Resilient, we actually turn the lights down and we all have a battery-operated candle and we turn it on. And we were I remind them that so much power just happened in this room. But if they leave it in the room and they don't bring it out to the real world and they don't become that light for someone else, then all it was just some words and a fun keynote. Right. But if we go out there and imagine the ripple impact we can have by physically taking that candle and handing it to someone else, being their light, the person that decided not to show up at that keynote, the person that decided that couldn't be in that room, that we be the light, the catalyst, and the ripple impact we can have to others.

SPEAKER_01

I love it. And I think that's a perfect way to wrap this episode. Thank you so much, Erica. Like I am going into this weekend feeling just more strong because of you. And I'm gonna make sure that I shine my light on other people, and I hope everyone out there as well will do the same. But before we go, I have four rapid fire questions for you guys.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, let's go. Let's I've been waiting for these. I'm like, I have no idea what they're gonna be, though. Just so everyone knows. She warned me at the beginning there was gonna be four. Easy peasy. Ready?

SPEAKER_01

All right, let's do this. What was your favorite food when you were a kid? Oh, my mom's chocolate chip cookie dough. Perfect. If you can have a drink with anyone who's alive or dead, who would it be and what's in your drink?

SPEAKER_00

Ooh, it would definitely be my grandmother on my mother's side. I miss her so much, and she had so much wisdom, and I don't think I appreciated it when I was a little girl. And because I was with her, I'd probably have like her drink of choice, which would have been a vodka on the rock. Slice of lime if I really felt like getting spicy. Okay. Right. What's your favorite self-help book? Oh my goodness, I have so many books. I will tell you, I read Jesus Calling every morning, and it really just brings me to a next level. It just the messages are really profound. Awesome.

SPEAKER_01

And last but not least, what's your favorite hype song?

SPEAKER_00

Uh oh my goodness. There's so many. Um, I don't know. I long girls just want to have fun. I really do. Cause I'm like, listen, this is what I'm all about. Let's go.

SPEAKER_01

Some fun. Life is so heavy sometimes. And that is the first time Cindy Lauper has made this list. So thank you so much. Erica, share where everyone can connect with you, please.

SPEAKER_00

Absolutely. I am on Instagram, I'm on LinkedIn, I have my website, www.erica Rothenberger.com. I would love to get to know some of you.

SPEAKER_01

Awesome. Everyone, thank you so much. Erica, thank you for everything for being the light truly here on this podcast today. And everyone out there, please subscribe and pass this along to somebody you know in your life that has just gone through a knockout because I think this just might be the light to shine on their day. So thank you so much. And leave a review while you're at it because I always appreciate those as well. We'll see you next time on the Art About Assery podcast. Thanks, everyone.