Pastor Brad’s Testimony: From Addiction to Redemption

Feat.:

Pastor Brad

Co-hosted by Maddison Sharp

Gia

In this powerful episode, Bobby sits down with Pastor Brad, alongside co-host Maddison Sharp and Gia, to hear an incredible testimony of faith, struggle, and transformation.

Pastor Brad opens up about his battle with alcoholism, his journey to becoming a pastor, and the life-changing role Jesus played in his story. His testimony is a reminder that no one is too far gone, no past is too broken, and God can change everything when you accept Him into your life.

From addiction to ministry, Pastor Brad’s story points back to the power of surrender, redemption, and the transforming love of Jesus.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hey guys, welcome back. Robert the realist. Today we have a special guest with us. So special.

unknown 0:07

So special.

SPEAKER_00 0:07

Just gonna let the special word go, but um for whatever you want there. But no, I really do. We got a got a special guest, a special person to us today. We also have uh upgraded and got another mic, so Gia gets to speak if she wants to.

SPEAKER_03 0:21

I get to participate. Gia Pat.

SPEAKER_00 0:23

And then we had our great co-host, Madison.

SPEAKER_03 0:25

Hello, guys.

SPEAKER_00 0:26

And then our special guest, Pastor Brad Femmler.

SPEAKER_04 0:31

Pastor. The pause really brings in the effect there.

SPEAKER_00 0:36

Well, I was waiting for you to tell me that just Brad's fine. Just Brad's okay.

SPEAKER_04 0:40

Just Brad Bradley is on my birth certificate, but we don't do that. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_00 0:44

We won't go that far. We'll maybe PB for peanut butter, because that's what your daughter calls you. That's right. That's right. Any of the any of the nicknames, pet names from the wife or daughter, okay.

SPEAKER_04 0:55

Well, yeah, we'll keep those. Oh, okay. Okay. Just with the daughter.

SPEAKER_00 0:59

Just with the daughter. Yeah. Yeah. We know. And this is Pastor Brad, guys. Here he is. Here he is. He's in the flesh. Here he is.

SPEAKER_06 1:04

He is.

SPEAKER_00 1:05

Well, I know that we've uh last couple Tuesdays, we've kind of had a testimony Tuesday, thanks to Madison's great mind of that's what we should do. And since then, I've lined up three or four weeks of them. So I'm pretty excited about this one too. I I mean I'm excited about all of them, but we're gonna let Pastor Brad kind of just tell his story. We you know, we're unscripted and we're raw and we're real, and we don't really have a schedule of what we do, but we just kind of want to you know he can go as deep as he wants to, or you know, stay at the level that he wants to, or really draw some people in and tell them, hey, that we're all fixable. Because me and me and Pastor Brad. Pastor Brad have have a history, and I'll just get that out of the way that we've had a history of fun, and we do have one bad moment in there that I was telling the girls about last week on the podcast. I wasn't even gonna say anything. Uh you got to see the worst side of me at at one point, but hey, you know, we live and learn, so here we are. But we'll um we'll open it up, let Pastor Brad start, and then we'll just plug in some questions as we go.

SPEAKER_04 2:18

Yeah, well, feel free to stop me at any point in time and it'd be super great. But I probably ought to set the scene because this was back in the 1900s. So we're gonna go back into the 1900s. I'd have thought about that one. Uh this story begins, and if I could really say it, it starts in the 1970s. Were we wanting to go back that far? Oh my goodness. I mean, if we got some stories from it, but I don't know if you got much of one and two. No stories there, yeah. I can't remember anything from then. But uh yeah, came from a super great family. My parents are awesome, love them uh absolutely to death. Just kind of the things you know, uh young people I think still go through these times as well, just confusing times, obviously, hormones and all of the stuff that we talk about now. But then also just finding your place in the world, and and it's super, super tough. I think I don't think that part has changed. And and I think that's been around forever, uh, really. But in high school, sporty guy, not gonna not gonna say that I was great at sports going into high school. I did did finally grow a little bit and put on a little bit of weight uh and and was able to do some stuff then, but in the interim, really got heavily into drinking. Like I can remember the first time having drinks, sitting around a fire, and got started in eighth grade, and just to keep all the innocent people or the guilty people, keep them innocent. I won't mention any names of stuff like that, you know. And it really kicked off something because sitting around that fire, all my friends were like, Man, you can really drink a lot. And I'm like, All right. So I can't be popular for basketball because I wasn't very good yet. I wasn't super fast or you know, anything like that. But all of a sudden, I got some acknowledgement. And and now I could be famous in my own head by drinking, right? And so so that really kind of kicked things off. And then and then through high school, it really, really got bad. I mean, to the point that one of the big jocks on the football team comes up to me, we're in the lunch line in front of God and everybody, and just says, Man, you're an alcoholic. And in my head, I went, You think I am now? You just wait. Like, I'll I'll show you, I'll show you what I can do. And I know that's a weird way to think, and but that's it's really just where I was at. I mean, there's plenty of people, plenty of my classmates that live around here that if they hear this, they'll be like, Oh yeah, I remember, you know. But what really spiraled is kind of in that drunken state, I went from drinking until I would puke, which you know, kind of should tell you to stop. You know, yeah, you know, hey, if you need a if you need a warning here here, it's coming back out. And so you should definitely don't miss that about high school. No, no, no. And uh uh, but then it went to passing out, which you know it's great. You pass out, you don't drink anymore, so that's good. But then it progressed into into blacking out and scary stuff.

SPEAKER_00 5:22

Those are the scary ones, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 5:24

Super, super scary, but none of it, none of it made me change. Not not not one thing, and then started getting trouble with the law a little bit here and there. Some minor in possession, alcohol, different things like that. And uh up in Jacksonville one time, I was at a place and uh I passed out and they just put me in a ditch because I think I was passed out amputed. And so then it started to rain, and so they they told me, I mean, I don't have any idea, I wasn't I wasn't there, uh, and uh said that water was running over my head, like you know, and just just crazy, crazy things. And quite honestly, I I deserved to be thrown in the ditch. I mean, at that point in time, it was it was insanity. Uh been in in in more wrecks than I would I would care to admit, and I've uh I've flipped cars end over end, but in in all of that, looking back at it now, I know God had a plan for me because one car I flipped end over end while it was spinning, and it it ended up in between two trees and right across the road from my aunt and uncle's house.

SPEAKER_02 6:31

Oh man.

SPEAKER_04 6:32

And so I was blacked out and almost got shot with a shotgun walking into their house, but I knew at least where I was and and and different things like that. But so yeah, so that was that was really high school. There was plenty of good times in high school as well. I don't want you to like uh I wasn't I mean, maybe a few times I I showed up uh uh after finding some extra bottles or cans in my in my car in the morning just to see if I'd get in trouble, I think was more than any any of it, but it was it was mostly weekends and stuff like that. But ultimately in all of that, it there was just an emptiness, and I did not know how to fill it.

SPEAKER_06 7:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 7:12

I tried. And there's drugs in there and and and living a lifestyle that I'm not proud of. It it at the end of the day, it was an emptiness, and whether it was I don't know, hearing stuff that I've done, feeling like I couldn't be forgiven for some of those things, whatever the case may be. And so it's just a horrible cycle of man, I can't get full, so I'll fill myself with something else. Right. Uh, but I can't be forgiven for any of it, so I'm stacking on all of that stuff, and and it's just it's just ultimately it's insanity. When I was sober, people said, Man, you're so respectful, you're so nice. When I was drunk, I was the opposite. Yeah. I was I was the opposite. And so so that's mid mid to early 90s. You get to 1999. I'd had a longtime girlfriend, and and we had broken up, and she was she was right to break up with me um after a pretty nasty weekend, had had talked with my parents and and different things, and and what had come out of that was I recognized I'd gotten to this place where people did not didn't know what to say any longer. Because I was getting old enough to where you couldn't just say, well, these are just young mistakes. People just started joking about it more. Like here, I here I am, really needed, probably needed some intervention, but we'll we'll just joke about it. And I just remember dwelling on a joke one time, and I was at my mom and dad's house, and I I just happened to look over my dad's shoulder, and there was his dear rifle, and sitting there, and I was like, that's it, because I'm tired of this, I'm not, I'm not gonna do this anymore. And so started to plan what the end would look like, and in the meantime, my roommate at the time had gone to a Christian bookstore and gotten this book called Divine Revelation of Hell. And I wasn't a reader uh then, I'm a much better reader now, but before he brings that book in and and and hands it to me, and he had since rededicated his life to Christ, and so he'd gone through some stuff, and and so he he gets back into church and back into following Jesus, but still let me stay there. He could have kicked me out, still lets me stay there, comes along with this book, says, Hey, I think I got this book for you because I don't have there's there's no reason for me to have it. I don't I don't want to read it, I don't I just don't. And I with some colorful language, I kind of let him know how I felt about getting a book like that. Uh not repeatable for this, um, and uh, but I can still remember it. And so he sat it down and it's like, you know, it's here. And so planted seed. Yeah, planted seed. And so be I've something got me to pick that book up, and and before I had finished reading that book, I was on page 100 for the night, which was that was a miracle in and of itself. I don't know if I read a hundred pages all through high school, uh, but but there there that was. There was just one story in it. You know, it talked about a cell in hell, and in that was somebody who always said that they would stop drinking, stop the stop all the all the junk, and they were gonna get right next week. But the problem was next week never came, next week never came, and then all of a sudden they die, and and there's this penalty. And and I've always told everybody like if you don't believe in in visions and oh that's not that's not gonna happen, that's that's all fine. Like I'm not I'm not gonna get hung up on whether you believe that or not. But that moment of just recognizing that man, I could really be hurting, like I knew I could be hurting people because I also during that time got two DWIs during all of that and uh lost lost my license for five years. Always had the joke that like I always told people I saw 2003 on a piece of paper before anybody else did, because I wasn't gonna get my license back for five years.

SPEAKER_00 11:18

So when did you I gotta ask, when did you get the DWIs? What year do you remember?

SPEAKER_04 11:23

Uh 90 uh 97, uh both of them were in 97. I had my license back for approximately six days from the first one when I got my second one.

SPEAKER_00 11:35

Okay. So I think mine was man, on or around that time. But I when I got my second one, I had my temp license from my first one. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'm not like trying to one up here or anything, but you know, yeah. So I just thought it would have been crazy if it was around the same time, which it really was. So we're both underage.

SPEAKER_04 11:54

Yeah, both, yeah. Yeah. All uh it ends up that really almost all of my drinking happened before I was 21. Yeah, and it just going but that second one I wrapped my truck around a telephone pole, had side-swiped a another pickup with a with a livestock trailer.

SPEAKER_06 12:09

Wow.

SPEAKER_04 12:10

Uh, but I'd put it in reverse. Like I was because I thought I was gonna go to prison for five years, and so I put I put that thing in reverse, but it it wasn't going nowhere. And like it's so such a horrible thing, and and I'm so glad that nobody was hurt. My pocket book was hurt, but but nobody, nobody was hurting that, and I'm super thankful that I couldn't because fleeing, I I like I would have gone to prison at that point in time. Like I I know that. But to get back on the book, and so I just realized, man, something something's gotta change. And my roommate comes back and he invites me to church. And I had I had gone to our our church family life fellowship. I had gone in October of '98, and this was now January of '99. But when I left in October, I had some colorful language about how I was never going to go back to that place again. Not be the people were wonderful, the people were awesome, but I was just like, nah, and I know now it's just being around God and wasn't just didn't didn't want all that goodness really. But he invites me back, and and so I go in, and what was so cool is that Pastor Vic, he he remembered the hat I was wearing from three months before, or two and a half months, whatever the case may be. And it's like, hey, imagine that blue blue Nike hat, black bill. I'm like, what in the world? And then what really sold me is nobody was judging me, nobody was criticizing me, and people just seemed genuine, like they were genuinely happy that I was there. And so that really just that did something. And I listened to the message, I heard, heard the gospel, and and where I grew up. I I mean I'd heard about Jesus and things, but this idea of relationship was so much stronger with with what I heard. And I left that night going the back in these days, they did altar calls where you came forward and and things like that. And so they gave the altar call, and there was a part of me that's like, oh yeah, I need to go up there, but I don't even know what what is this? Like, I don't, I don't get it, I don't understand it. Uh, and so I left to tell my roommate we're at a stoplight, and I'm like, oh man, I think I was supposed to go up there. And he's still a baby Christian, and so he tells me, Well, I hope nothing happens to you. I hope you don't die this week. Oh no, you know, and so and like I know now, like that's I was saved at that point. Like if something was gonna happen, I I I just I know I was saved at that point. Um, but I did. I I was very careful. I worked in a rock quarry mine, so there was the opportunity for stuff to happen. But oh man, yeah, you know, and uh, but came back and and the the next week and didn't care a thing about what was said. All I knew was I needed to get to that altar call. And I went up and and said, Yes, I believe in Jesus, yes, I'm gonna follow Jesus, and I mean crying and and and there was a high school guy up there who's leading me in the prayer and helping me start the start out in all of this, you know, and and yeah, just just bawling. And from there, literally, those those tears in that moment, call it emotional, call it whatever you want. But it felt like something was literally lifted off of me. Now, obviously, everybody thinks I'm so perfect now, but there's a little bit of a big thing.

SPEAKER_01 15:40

We do think that, Pastor Brad. There you go.

SPEAKER_05 15:43

Yeah, we finally got to use it. Oh, I love it.

SPEAKER_04 15:46

The flaws and everything. No, obviously, like not everything fell off at once, and and there was getting my mind right, getting my emotions right, and stuff like that. But it started me on this this amazing journey. And I just realized that there is there is a God who loves me, and and he is Jesus, and he and he really did go to that cross for me, not just to get me to heaven, but to set me free in life now. And through that progression, I still remember the last beer I had. I was sitting in our house and a friend was over, and we were getting ready to go to a party, and I'd said yes to Jesus, but I'm I Budweiser long neck, like I still remember to this day, and took one sip and just sitting there with him, and I was like, I'm not gonna do this anymore. This is not this is not me anymore. And so I went and started dumping him. Now he didn't like that. He's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, I'm going to a party. I will I'll take them. I didn't say it. Uh and and so just uh so I did, and and really for the next, I guess that's almost year, I I was sober, I joined the Army, Army National Guard, went to basic training, and then in my job skill, my MOS, you're confined, and then you start to get a little freedom. Uh sometimes people can't handle that, and I was one of them, and so went on a three-week binge during that time. It was a long holiday. Woke up in a hotel room with a bunch of people I didn't know. And uh I could go into some other description descriptive things, but it it was just not a great situation, and so that was July of 2000. And so this July will be 26 years sobriety. Wow, no drinks, no, no drugs, nothing, nothing like that. And it's and it's pretty cool. And so uh, man, just the ride um of following Jesus, and I mean, there's been so many great people along my path, and and there just happened to be a whole bunch of other 20 somethings that were coming into the church at that time, and we were all living in Columbia, and so we would do Bible studies, and we would go to to CJ's on Broadway, and we go eat a bunch of uh burn your face off wings and curly fries, right? Come on, let's go. If you're gonna have a Bible study, let it be on a full stomach. Exactly. You know, and uh, but we would go there, we would have have fun, no drinking. It was just the just the wings and stuff, and then we would go back and and talk about what we were reading in the Bible and talk about what we were going through. I mean, the realist, right? To be to be real. Uh we didn't have all the answers, but we would read something in the Bible and it would say, Hey, you're supposed to go lay your hands on the sick. Well, one of the places that we would meet was literally two blocks away from Boone Hospital. So we'd be like, Well, let's go.

SPEAKER_02 18:55

I love that. Oh wow, let's go.

SPEAKER_04 18:57

Let's just go into the hospital and see if somebody wants some prayer. And that those were things, or we would, I mean, at that time, maybe there were cell phones, I guess. There were cell phones. Yeah, there were cell phones in. They were not like what we have now, but we might call up to the church and just be like, hey, who's in the hospital? We can go visit them and stuff like that. And so we together started living this thing out and and doing it and and all of that. And so, yeah, so it's been a ride. While I was away at basic training, AIT, Pastor Vic sends me a letter, says, Hey man, I want to talk to you when you get back. I remember what it was like. He was in the Air Force. I remember what it was like, hey, I just I want to I want to talk to you when you get back. And I was like, Oh man, Pastor Vic just found out everything I've never heard of.

SPEAKER_00 19:46

We're gonna have a sit down. Yeah, he's gonna kick me out of the church here.

SPEAKER_04 19:52

But uh he he had seen something in me, and before I'd gone to basic training, I was having lunch with a friend, like literally 24 hours before I left, and I was like, I think I'm supposed to be a pastor. And I'm like, but those guys look like they work hard. I don't want to do that. Like I joined the army so I could go make some money. Like I was gonna move to Kansas City, I was gonna go work in communications, uh, because regardless of all, or besides all of that other stuff, I scored really good on my ASVAB test. So I found out I was smart. I hadn't killed out all my brain fail. So I was like, I can do all I can do some of this stuff, you know. And so found out I was smart. Uh but yeah, he comes and he's like, Hey, uh yeah, I'd like to bring you on as a janitor. So I was like, Well, that's it's better than getting kicked out of the church, you know. And so, yeah, I can be a janitor. And he said, I'm gonna pay you a whopping thousand dollars a month. I was like, bro. I was like, okay, yeah, we'll we'll make it work, we'll figure I'll figure this out. I was still single and and so rented a rented a room from some people in the church, like literally a room, and uh did life with them and and came on board and then student pastor and then meet my wife at the church and we get married, we go to ministry school down around Houston. Oh, that's awesome. Like we don't we'd only known each other for three months and then moved a thousand miles away, six hundred miles away, whatever it was, to to knowing nobody, nobody. Wow, and uh yeah, I mean it's it's just been so amazing. I've seen just amazing miracles, people cured of cancer. I've watched my daughter grow up who had a rough start. I mean, uh and in all of it, God's just been faithful in in so many things. I mean, for anybody that's out there that happens to be listening, that maybe you're going through some dark stuff. We kind of started this like there's there is always hope. We didn't say it like that, but I mean there there really is always hope, and I'm just gonna tell you, Jesus really. Is the way. He'll bring joy in the storm. He'll bring peace in the midst of so much turmoil. Like it's there's there's just so much. I've traveled the world. I've traveled the world because of Jesus. Right or Brazil or any of those. They it it wasn't gonna do that, but Jesus has. And I've played soccer in we well, we just got back from playing soccer in the mountains. And yeah, literally. Yeah, I mean, literally in Haiti, played, couldn't speak any Creole whatsoever in Haiti. Kids didn't know what we were saying, but we knew how to kick a ball. And so on a mountaintop, I've I've played soccer with kids on mountaintops and valleys and in Brazil and and and just all over. And it's and it's just been so amazing. And one thing that holds true is that no matter where you're at, Jesus is still the answer.

SPEAKER_00 22:57

Yeah, yep. So that's what I've noticed going across the pond. It's we may all speak different languages languages, but we all speak the same language when it comes to him. Oh, for sure.

SPEAKER_02 23:06

Oh, 100%. Because one day we will. I mean, I like when we're up there, we're all yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:10

Yeah, I'm gonna back you up to the beginning. And so I'm a person that doesn't like to play a victim card, and you could have played a victim card, I think. And I'm trying to find out that piece of what in your life before you got into drinking a lot. What do you think your life was missing that you needed the alcohol, that you needed to fill that void? Because that's what people do these days, if I'm being real, is we're like, I had a rough childhood, I got beat when I was this, right? And and those things are real and they do affect you later on, but I'd say from our perspectives, we went through quite a bit when we're younger, and here we are. We're not using it in a victim mentality, we're using it as a look and see what God can do. So I'm trying to say, you know, I could say my dad left when I was I so I grew up without a father. Um, he kicked the crap out of me when he was there, and he had alcohol and he had cocaine and he had drugs, so I could use, you know, a poor. You know, today's world would be super poor for people. Um, I could say that's what made me do my drinking at an early age if I wanted to, and then I could probably still play that victim card if I wanted to, but I've chosen not to. What what do you think there was a void in your life? Was it mom, dad? What do you think?

SPEAKER_04 24:33

Family was good. Now I will say alcohol was just always a part of our life. That's not, I mean, and and some people can make it through that. I think for me, the alcohol was a rite of passage. Like, you know, when you can get to where you can handle this, then then you're growing up. And so I think that was kind of uh one of one of the things there. It just wasn't uncommon. Like when I when you get older, you're gonna drink. That's that was just that was just kind of kind of a part of it. But I think for me personally, it ended up being I felt so outside from my group of friends or whatever that I didn't have, I didn't have some sort of connecting point, like we would do some sports, but I wasn't I wasn't gonna get picked first. Right. Not no, I'm not gonna say I was gonna get picked last. So I'm you know, but um well, there was times when I got picked last, but you know I don't remember if I don't remember, and so there was just I saw what some of them had. I grew up out in the country, and and obviously times are different, seven miles outside of the country. Mom and dad didn't go into town all the time, and you just sometimes you just don't know what you're missing, and maybe I wasn't invited to some of the birthday parties that kids go to. And I mean, I was invited to some too. I'm not gonna play that, but I just always felt so different than everybody else. And so I when I had those first drinks and it qu didn't seem to affect me, right? I'm doing air quotes right now for everybody listening. Um, but you know, it just didn't seem to affect me, and that's what they noticed, and they're like, oh yeah. And so if you go like biology, right? Some so there's some science out there that that that alcoholism, maybe it's a gene. And so in that, maybe I activated that thing. If it's if it's not a gene, like I I lean more towards kind of a generational curse, and and I feel like I can track it through my family and and stuff like that. I can kind of see it. I think every one of my brothers and I'm sisters, I'm the oldest of eight, and I think all of us have been in jail at some point in time for drinking, right? So I mean it's it's there. Maybe maybe my sister who's passed away, she may not have ever been in in jail. But uh, yeah, the red all the seven other seven, we've all uh been been heard that heard that.

SPEAKER_02 27:00

I think it's just part of your calling that to be a pastor. I mean, think about how many people you have to relate to and all the youth that you all the youth that you're around, and yeah, you like you really have to God puts you through things to relate to people and he's not gonna waste anything, and that and that's so important.

SPEAKER_04 27:16

Like, did he he God didn't say, Hey, take this drink, but don't worry, I'm gonna I'm gonna bring you through later on. It's gonna be okay. Go ahead and drink this. And and it wasn't that, but you know, in Romans 8 28, he's gonna he's gonna use everything for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purposes. He's not gonna waste pain. Right. Like God's God's God's just not gonna waste pain. And so I don't know that I have a really great excuse for for going through the things that I I went through.

SPEAKER_03 27:44

Um it was more of a it to me, it seems like it was more of a social tool that turned into an addiction. Which is very much I'm cool, yeah, yeah. Yeah, absolutely, 100%, 100%. Yeah, which is what happened to a lot of my friends too back in high school.

SPEAKER_02 27:57

I feel like alcohol is a very good way for Satan to get young to people because I I struggled with doing stupid stuff like that too.

SPEAKER_04 28:05

Yeah. Um but at the end of the day, people don't know how to come at you or come to you, or maybe that's a better term, come to you when they start to see some of those things. Instead of just drumming everything up to youthfulness and things like that. Sometimes we got to sit down and just be like, hey, this this may not be okay for you. Like, I understand Billy down the road doesn't have any problem or or whatever, but this this isn't working out for you. And uh it's a a good a good sign of that is if you've been in trouble with the law and you're still going out and doing it, yeah. You might have a problem. Yeah, there might be a little bit of a problem. There might be something there that somebody needs to come around and be like, hey, yeah, you know, we this isn't youthful anymore. This is the say now, this is your second DWI. Yeah, uh, your next one you lose your license at that time for 10 years. Now it's I think it might be gone forever after the third if there's if there's not some sort of intervention, you know. And so it's just if I it I mean to encourage people is if you get that check in your gut on somebody, it's better to say something to in love. Obviously, don't don't be uh a booty head, right? You know, and only a booty head and kept a G right. But yeah, don't don't do that to them. Say say something in love so it at least gets them the opportunity to think about it. You can't make anybody change, right? You can't make anybody change, but sow a seed. Sow a seed.

SPEAKER_00 29:43

Plant the seed, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 29:45

Show some love.

SPEAKER_02 29:46

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 29:47

You had that same thing.

SPEAKER_02 29:48

Yeah, it's all about what we learn with our temporary walk with the enemy in our lives.

SPEAKER_00 29:53

Yeah, I'm I'm glad that Felicia invited me to her baptism.

SPEAKER_04 29:57

Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_00 29:58

That's yeah, that's where mine started at. I was a little nervous on that day. I bet you I knew he was gonna bring it up. I knew he was gonna bring it up.

SPEAKER_04 30:07

You can't you can't share that and not be it's a segue. It is. It's a segue.

SPEAKER_00 30:14

Yeah, and you've always got that if you need it in their back pocket.

SPEAKER_04 30:17

It's so great.

SPEAKER_00 30:17

It works well.

SPEAKER_04 30:18

It works well. It works well.

SPEAKER_00 30:20

It works well.

SPEAKER_02 30:20

Do you girls got any questions for Pastor Brad about his what would Pastor Brad today say to younger Pastor Brad?

SPEAKER_04 30:28

That's good. I think I think I hear this a lot with older older pastors and and just older people who are getting ready, they know they're getting ready to transition to heaven, right? And take the time to love God more and love his people. Like I when I when older I see older pastors or older people who know that they're they're they're solid, they're good, like what would you have done different? Man, I'd have just I'd have just loved people more. I would I would have taken the time to to love God more and and just love his people more. Like all all the stuff that you can have is oh, it's super fun to have all the stuff, but yeah, just love people more.

SPEAKER_00 31:10

What would you say? Because, you know, in your defense, you get 20-some years. I mean, you can talk about what he would say to the younger pastor Brad. My question would be let's go, you know, 10 or 15-year-old kids. How do we get to them before they start that drinking or before they start? How do we get them involved with God and Jesus? Because that if somebody would have done that to us, now you know, mom made me go to Baptist church, made me go to church. Like what since you've been a youth pastor, what would you what would you say to that that group?

SPEAKER_04 31:45

Uh just recognize that you can't you can't make the decisions for them first and foremost, but don't waste an opportunity to tell them that they're loved, then to show them that they're loved, and then to show them what their potential really is. Like, no matter what's being said on the outside, if we're like we're sitting at a table right now, if I'm sitting with them and they say, Man, I just want somebody to dot dot dot. Then you you have the opportunity to be that person. Like we can't do every single thing for every single person. We can't. Um Most of us have within our bubble or right on the outside of our bubble the opportunity to to be that for somebody, and we can't wait for somebody else to do it. So we tell them, but then you got to show them. Yes. And then and then and then you let them know, hey man, this is like this, this is tough now. I know. Like, I'm not gonna like the old addict, uh, you'll you'll understand when you get older how tough how easy you have it. And and I make jokes about that with my 18-year-old daughter now. Um, but the reality is it is tough. It is tough. So don't don't tell people who say, Oh, I'm just struggling. Well, it's not really a struggle. You just wait and you'll get something to you'll get a real struggle. No, if they're saying it, listen. And then, and then not just what's the Bible say, well, I don't want to just be a hearer of the word, but be a doer, right? So I don't want to just hear that they need love. I want to be able to show them that love that they're that they feel like they're missing.

SPEAKER_03 33:22

Yeah, right. One thing I always tell myself, like as one of the student leaders, is their struggle to me may not seem like it's super big or super relevant, like, oh, I just broke up with my boyfriend, whatever it may be. But that's also probably one of the only struggles that they've been through. So it's gonna feel worse. Right. It's just going to be the first one. Yeah. So it's one of those things where it's like you have to kind of put yourself in their shoes and just tell them how much they're loved and appreciated.

SPEAKER_02 33:52

Exactly. And and my kids see me struggle every day. Like Stella, if I if I slip up or I do something, I'm telling an immediate lesson. I'm like, God doesn't want, you know, like I'm not trying to be like hypocritical, but like you have to give those lessons that like you're not gonna be perfect. That's right. Like, so don't don't try to be perfect, but just yeah, follow God.

SPEAKER_04 34:11

And I think my wife's been super great with that with my daughter. Um, and uh shout out to Meredith.

SPEAKER_00 34:20

We're gonna have to get all the wives in here one day. Pat was just robbing this, robbing that wife that. Well, you've met Pat, right? We need to get it. Sorry, Pat, just kidding, just kidding, Pat.

SPEAKER_04 34:31

Uh but uh but she was she has been and is still so good at for Maya to be like, hey, this is what you're going through. This is what it was like when I was younger, and this is how we can walk through it together. And she'll use scripture and prayer and and really making the Bible real for Maya. And uh at this, I mean, and obviously Maya's not perfect. I don't have rose-colored glasses when it comes to my daughter. I just I just have always chose not to. But for the most part, it seems like now she is echoing that stuff, and she's had plenty of her own problems. She's she's obviously made mistakes, all of those things have have happened. Uh, but then at the end of the day, she can she can come back to that foundation that's been there because it's been spoken into her so often, so often, so much, so much.

SPEAKER_03 35:24

You can very much tell it's pretty awesome.

SPEAKER_04 35:27

Yeah, and so Meredith did a good job. I can't take any credit.

SPEAKER_00 35:31

I cannot take any credit for that whatsoever. Meredith many me. With a little bit of Brad, because I have to tell my attitude. Hallelujah. Yeah, I think it's super great.

SPEAKER_02 35:40

She carries herself like Mare.

SPEAKER_00 35:42

Yeah, yeah, she does. She's she's she's a great kid. Y'all have done a great job with her thing. And I can say that because she's been working for me for the last couple months. So I get to see her and share time with her and correct her and fix her and tell her about acting like a dad. I don't say anything about mom. I'm scared of mom. Absolutely, absolutely. I ain't I'm not I'm not that dumb.

SPEAKER_04 36:02

So she would say she's a big beast of a person.

SPEAKER_00 36:04

Yeah. Yeah. No, no, I ain't messing with Meredith, that's for sure. Um, anything else you want to add? And I guess one one other thing I was gonna say is how important do you think it is for the parent of that youth to be involved, for them to get involved? Like just have you ever studied that statistic? I mean, I'm sure you have.

SPEAKER_04 36:27

I do not have a solid statistic that I could tell you right now, but let's just take church going. If the dad goes to church and and brings the family, then when that child is older, 90% of the time they'll keep going to church. All right. Now it goes, I don't I'm I'm not gonna try to pretend I know the stat, but it drops significantly if the mom is the only person. Uh and and I'm changing that and stuff there. But it's like, and that's not a that's obviously not a slam against any single parents out there or or anything like that. Uh, but I I mean I tell divorcees, I tell people who have been in the maybe they've never been married with the dad or the mom and stuff like that. I'm like, pray for them to get saved, pray for them to be going to church because now you're unified in that, and now you're you're showing that even through that situation, regardless of whether there's justification for it or not, like that you don't even have to get into weeds on all that, but that parental involvement, like even though kids, I know in the like public school system, they spend so much time with these teachers and administrators and different things like that, they still come home to the you, the parents. They come home to the parents. That's right. And what you are doing and how you're helping and how you're speaking to them and what you're leading them into will matter so much. Don't just send your kids to church. Yeah, come with them, parents. That's right. Come with them.

SPEAKER_00 37:59

It is good. Yeah, no, I I just wondered because I kind of watched my family, and then you know, everybody started coming. And then now, like, my soon-to-be daughter-in-law's dad is coming.

SPEAKER_01 38:10

And you know, my boyfriend just asked for his one-year Bible, and then her boyfriend just you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_00 38:16

So that's why I was wondering how that played out with I wouldn't have started going to church if it wasn't for my dad.

SPEAKER_03 38:22

Exactly. Like, my dad was the sole reason why we started going, and it has been nothing but a blessing since then. So my aunt would take me when I was a kid, but we didn't really just we didn't go every Sunday.

SPEAKER_02 38:33

And now I'm hooked on my pathway.

SPEAKER_03 38:35

And we went to school all my life, then we moved here and stopped, and then we started going again.

SPEAKER_00 38:41

Yeah, that's the worst feeling when I miss church. Like nothing else worse than missing church to me. The feeling I have all week if I miss church.

SPEAKER_02 38:48

And I feel bad because I don't I don't make Stella go. I don't make my child go, and I probably should, but with that, I know, I know, but but with that, I have I have been gifted with the when she says yes, and I'm like, yes.

SPEAKER_00 39:03

My kids, I told them to go in the mother. Yeah, and and now they go, and now they serve, and now they do all those things. So I'm just thank God that I've got out she's sings for the most part of worship song.

SPEAKER_04 39:14

The the thing about that, and to any other parent that's like, oh, I just don't feel like I should force it upon them. We talk about why we go, right? Right. There is a special feeling when you're around other people. That's right. Right. And in I believe in most churches, like I obviously I haven't been to all of them, but we all have this tendency to be able to find people who have either been in our shoes or are are in our shoes right now. That's right. And so not only is it this this idea of worshiping with other people and praying with other people and and maybe hearing a great message, but it's it's this connection piece. We say it all the time that life happens and life happens good or bad in the context of the relationships that you have. And the people in church obviously aren't perfect, but you can find people that you can do community with and that will care for you. And so when we start to tell people and tell our children, like this isn't this isn't so that the chiefs win or the cowboys win on Sunday, like, oh, we're just gonna go to church because they they're playing today. We better we better get to work. Yeah, but that stuff doesn't work, you know, it's not there. It's it's we're going because there is something special that happens. Yeah, and and as parents, when you after you walk out with your children, you can ask them, don't just ask them, hey, was it fun? Was it good, but find a way to ask them, like, like in our our kids' ministry, we're always doing a memory verse. What was that memory verse that you had for today? And then you as a parent, a kid will go nuts if you're memorizing it with them, but then if you also tell them how that scripture is important in your life. Like, man, when you lay that out, and it and and I'll tell you, that will never stop. If you if you get it started, it will never stop. You'll be able to do that throughout their whole lives. And and uh obviously hopefully they start memorizing it on their own without having to be told, you know, and different things, but but it'll it'll happen forever and and it makes all of this stuff that we do real.

SPEAKER_02 41:24

Yeah, and so and God will speak to your children um and use them as vessels for sure, because I made a status a couple weeks ago and I've been I went through a really rough couple weeks or whatever, but um made a status about how walking with Jesus isn't always rainbow and butterflies, but it is like walking in the dark. Well, you always have a flashlight, okay? 100% well, we were sitting there and um Stella look over and she's drawing this picture, and it's a beam of light from the sky, and it says person, and half of the person's black and white, and the half of them stepping in is color. And I go, is that a flashlight, Stella? And she goes, No, mom, that is God's light.

SPEAKER_05 42:03

Let's go.

SPEAKER_02 42:04

But it was just like that little wink from God, like it's a full circle. He he he uses, yeah. So I mean it to me, that's him telling me you're going at a good pace. Like, but it was nice because I've prayed and I pray for my family to go to church. I pray for everybody to go to church. And I asked Stella one morning, I go, You want to go to church with me? And she goes, Yeah. And I wasn't expecting that. I go, Oh crap, I've got 30 minutes.

SPEAKER_03 42:28

Yeah, and I've got to get ready now. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 42:31

Yeah. And um, and uh yeah, she wanted to come and we set up in the rafter, and it was just really it is.

SPEAKER_00 42:37

It's the most stubborn person I know, my father-in-law, and he doesn't he's come to church a couple times. He like picks up his uh, you know how many he probably went once or twice this year, which is an improvement, but he watches it at home.

SPEAKER_05 42:52

Yeah, that's awesome.

SPEAKER_00 42:54

And when I don't share my prayer on Facebook, he asked me where it's at.

SPEAKER_04 42:58

Uh that's awesome. That's you know all those, all those are amazing seeds. Yeah, it's it's so it's so amazing. And uh it just yeah, I mean, I'm uh I'm not always a fan of technology. Here I am on a podcast, right? Uh but it's you gotta be.

SPEAKER_02 43:16

It's a healthy balance, it's all the way to reach Jesus.

SPEAKER_04 43:19

That's right. Man, we're getting Jesus out to so many more ears, so many more souls now than than ever before. And and we're gonna keep and we're gonna keep on doing it. Why? Because everything is a seed, and and you never know when that person hits rock bottom like I did. Like it's not we don't we don't penalize people who haven't been coming to church. Like we don't try to guilt trip them. Uh now if you're my friend, you don't have to be able to do that. Now if you're my friend, if you're my friend, you might get a little bit of a video to the channel.

SPEAKER_00 43:49

Paige gave me the net car one time and a little bit.

SPEAKER_05 43:52

You know, I was like, you know, yeah, if you're if we got if we got solid relationships, I'll I'll be a little more real with you.

SPEAKER_04 43:58

But I give them my own. We are happy to see them. And what we also recognize in that is whatever brings them in. I mean, I'm gonna make up this stat, but you know, 60%, 70% of the time, it's something bad has happened in their life. And so that's what's bringing them back in. And they're just looking for that same love and compassion that I didn't know I was looking for when I came, but then recognize, oh man, this this stuff's legit. Yeah, like this is this is real. Like when we talk about God's love, it is like John 3 16 for God so loved the world, right? Oh, everybody knows that one, but no, it's really he did so much that he put his love inside his people so that we could share it with others.

SPEAKER_02 44:41

Amen.

SPEAKER_00 44:42

Yeah, man, I think that's it right there. That's the point. That'll do it. Pastor Brad, I appreciate you. You've been great, great testimony. It's just crazy how much our stories align. And I would I would say the same thing about all the just to be cool to fit in the drinking part. So, I mean, it's just you know, we share the DWIs together. Yeah, we do. That's just that we're proud of. But more than anything, now we share cheese. Now we share. I was getting like all of us are sitting there at this table because of him. Yeah, 100% crazy. And we're talking the testimonies, and we're all friends.

SPEAKER_02 45:20

And you guys are family, like you guys are really family. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 45:23

We've now traveled halfway around the world. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:26

I just know I could come to any of you with anything and not feel judged or that's awesome.

SPEAKER_00 45:31

Yeah, and the laugh sounds the same halfway around the world.

SPEAKER_03 45:35

It doesn't change, it does not change.

SPEAKER_00 45:37

Airplanes, Romanias, Moldova. It's all right. It's just as loud everywhere else. Like, no matter what. I was like, where's Pat? Oh, there he is. There he is. The laughter around the world. If there's one thing to be known for laughter, I'll take it. I'll take it. Yeah, I'll take it. All right, guys. Well, I appreciate you tuning in. Don't forget to like, subscribe, comment wherever you're at, and look forward to next Tuesday. I don't know who it is, but I think we got another testimony. We'll say testimony Tuesday, even though it doesn't come out until like Thursday or Friday. But hey, on Tuesday we recorded this.

SPEAKER_03 46:08

I guess it's Testimony Thursday. Testimony and we get it out.

SPEAKER_00 46:11

When we get it out, it was recorded on Tuesday. So all right, guys. Well, I appreciate it. Robert the Real is out.