Your Mirror of True Seeing

Stop Performing. Start Becoming.

The most powerful tool for changing your life isn't hidden in a book or locked away by someone else—it is buried beneath the noise of your daily routine.

In this episode of The Authentic Self, Piper Winfred invites you into the sanctuary of your own mind—your personal "Woods"—to hold up a mirror of true seeing. You aren't here to change who you are for the world; you are here to strip away the expectations and finally show up, unapologetically, as the hero of your own story.

In this episode, you will learn:

• The Sanctuary Technique: How to find your "Woods"—a mental space for deep, uninterrupted contemplation.
• The Mirror of True Seeing: How to identify the unique attributes and characteristics that define your most authentic, "splendiferous" self.
• The Rule of Three: A simple, transformative framework to intentionally refine your character, three steps at a time, without the overwhelm of perfectionism.
• Humanity as the Anchor: Why authenticity is not about isolation, but about leaning into your connection to the human experience with courage and compassion.

You are the architect of your own journey, not a passenger to the opinions of others. It’s time to stop performing and start living the story you were meant to write.

Listen now to discover your True North—and find out which of your three attributes you’ll put into action today.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:14

The most powerful tool you possess for changing your life isn't hidden in a book or locked away by someone else. It is currently buried beneath the noise of your daily routine, waiting for you to clear the path. Hello, welcome to the authentic self. I'm Piper Winifred, and today we're stepping into the sanctuary of your own mind, your personal space to hold up a mirror of true scene. You'll learn how to identify the authentic attributes that define your best self and apply the simple, transformative power of the rule of three to refine your character one step at a time. This isn't about changing who you are for others. It's about stripping away the expectations of the world so you can finally show up fully and unapologetically as the hero of your own story. Be sure to click the follow button so you never miss an episode. And now let's begin. To go into the woods, visualize yourself on a beautiful path in the woods. The sky above is a serene blue and looks like it was painted with a watercolor brush. Deep green trees stand like sentinels on either side of the path. You often go to a metaphorical woods where you find the perfect place for contemplation. In a previous episode, we talked about the seven steps of the path, and then we talked about how your values shape the path like a compass, leading to your true north. Now we'll add to your authenticity journey the idea of a metaphorical space we'll call the woods. You want to picture a phenomenal path, and it doesn't have to be woods, but whatever or wherever brings you peace. Where or what are your woods? The woods don't have to be outdoors. You might find your woods in a small corner of a coffee shop, in a library, a bookstore, or a window seat in a cozy room. The important aspect in choosing your woods is that you feel safe and secluded and can think uninterrupted. My woods have always been feeding ducks at a local duck pond. Everywhere I've lived, all over the world, one of the first things I've done is look for a duck pond so I can find peace and seclusion while feeding the ducks. Just find a quiet place like the woods where you can spend time thinking in serene contemplation. Once you have your contemplative space, close your eyes and reach deep inside yourself. Visualize the beauty of your chosen space and center yourself as if you are truly there. You belong in this place, even if it's in your imagination. It's your place. Let it claim you. If you find it difficult to imagine your quiet space, try going to Pinterest.com and type in woods or beach or path, whatever you think your path of contemplation is. You're on this path of contemplation where everything is tranquil. You are alone with your thoughts and they feel good. Don't think about any list of undone tasks waiting in your head. You can wander physically or sit and wander mentally. In this time of quiet contemplation, you can hear your inner self. This is an important practice for acquiring your true self. Enter your woods with mindfulness and pay special attention to the path you took to get there. Live in the moment as if you are writing the story of going into the woods. Mark it with your mind so you know exactly how to get there and get back again. Make it yours. Not just the woods, but the path to a peaceful, exclusive place. Bring your own special energy to the experience. By energy, I mean the aura that you recognize as yours. This is the energy that surrounds you and swirls around you, the electrical feeling you can pull into. The more you practice this exercise, the easier it will be. You will want to visit the woods many times in your life for peace and contemplation. As you sit in this calm, quiet space, the important task before you is something quite fundamental to discover your attributes and characteristics. This is important. You don't have to make up these attributes out of thin air. You can use the list of attributes on my website at piperwinter.com to quickly decide what matches and doesn't match your true self. Imagine a mirror of true scene. Previously you imagined your values. Now in this quiet place, you're going to formulate a list of attributes or characteristics that describe you. Just like you did with your values, make a list of 20 to 50 attributes that define you. You might think of these as your personality. These are different from the values you hold. List both good and bad. Again, there is no judgment when you are working on your true self. Since you probably have a good idea of who you are, this will be a fairly easy task. So you're looking in a mirror. You're not looking at your makeup, the color of your eyes, or how your hair turned out today. You're searching for the true you. Deep inside there is an authentic self that existed from the day you were born, and no one else is quite like you. It's not just that you have your own look. It's that deep inside is an authenticity factor that sparks self. This will get easier. Over time you will learn to see it, but for now, just gaze, don't stress. I'll say what I've said before: no one else can be a better you, no matter how hard they try or how good an actor they are. It's impossible for someone else to be better at it. You are unique out of the billions of people in the world, and if you recognize and embrace that, you are more valuable than the rarest gem or element on earth, which happens to be astatine. Now, here is the exciting part. The attributes list is your mirror of true thing. You look in the mirror and see yourself. The world's wisdom through the ages tells us that purposely forming your path comes in one way. Focus action geared towards a code of conduct that you choose. The attributes list that you're going to formulate operates as a bridge on your stunning path. You already chose your values. Now you're adding attributes to your path. The path that you already determined was pointing true north, where you can point true north, put your characteristics in place, and be the subject of your life. If you are the subject of your life, you are the decider of your story. You are the hero in your story. Thousands of years of human history tell us this is true. It also makes sense. Note the path has nothing to do with performance for other people. It's not about what other people think. It's about you. Your only competitor is yourself. You are not only worthy, but you are also enough. I don't have to know you personally to know that about you. First of all, you're listening to this episode, and that tells me something about you. You want to engage. You worked that out with the seven steps of the path. The other aspect I know about you comes from my experience. Each and every individual is unique and wondrous in their own way. It's only a matter of recognizing your individuality and authenticity that will allow you to shine. All this talk about paths makes me realize I want to emphasize that typical traveling on the path is an everyday experience of meeting the day's requirements and learning as you go. Once you have your list, we can move on. When you were looking in the mirror, going through your list of attributes, you concocted above. Did you choose any attributes that you want to change? Either add them or eliminate them because maybe those items have sort of become a part of you, but you want to get rid of them since that's not really who or what you are or what you want to be. Make sure as you look over your list that you didn't choose any characteristics that you wish you have, but don't have yet. You can place check marks next to any attribute you want to add or eliminate that you feel isn't part of the true you. While you're in this mode, imagining looking deep into the mirror, look at your current list of attributes and scroll through with your eyes to the items you've written down. Do you recognize yourself in these items you chose, or do you need to adjust? Sometimes we choose items that negative naysayers, in other words, people who don't have our best interests at heart, say about us, and they are fundamentally untrue. They are said to hurt or wound us. Unfortunately, we are only human and we have a tendency to own those characteristics someone else, a negative naysayer, attached to us even when it's not who we are. Now, let me tell you about the rule of three. While you were in the woods, you formulated a list of attributes in lieu of looking in the mirror to see and chose the attributes that matched you. If you want to have a physical list, you can print the list of attributes that's on my website. Perhaps you placed a check mark next to those characteristics that you want to add or eliminate. When you discover the characteristics or attributes that you want to eliminate and add it to your list, it might seem overwhelming. Don't for a minute let that thought stay in your mind because there is an easy way to eliminate characteristics and attributes and add them too. This happens with the rule of three. The rule of three is straightforward. No matter how many attributes you have on your list that you want to eliminate or add, the rule of three says that you can only work on three at a time. You do not move on to the next three until you have successfully eliminated and or added all three. Pick three, yes, only three at a time, that you want to work on making stronger, better, or deeper, and write them down in your journal or on a post-it you place on your bathroom mirror or somewhere you will see it every day. Until all three are incorporated into your daily life or removed altogether, you will not add or eliminate three more. You get three total. Think about the attributes you found when you looked in the mirror of Trucene. Next, imagine how you can literally transform yourself in your life by practicing the rule of three. Have you ever watched a butterfly emerge from its chrysalis? It's fascinating, isn't it? To go from a creaturely caterpillar to an aerial butterfly is one of nature's miracles. The transformation is similar to what you will experience as you encounter yourself on this segment of the path. Doing the difficult work of looking in the mirror of true scene, testing yourself as the hero that you are, and owning up to your strengths, of course, then also facing your weaknesses and having the humility and courage to practice the rule of three, to transform your daily path, to live your best life, just like a butterfly. The path of authenticity is not about a coward's path of accepting every inclination of the self, no matter how weak, dangerous, harmful to others, selfish or small-minded. The authentic self is your better self. The authentic self is your best self. And as you go through the transformation you choose, you will discover how true this is. Here's an important concept in authenticity. Villains don't get a free pass for their dirty deeds by saying, but this is my true self. It may be the case that what a villain says is truthful. The murderous manifestation is their true self. In that case, however, they are not on the path of authenticity because they are not on a path of humanity. Your attributes list can also be called touchstones to humanity because part of the authenticity journey is the truth with the capital T truth that a large part of authenticity is the acknowledgement of our membership in humanity. Authenticity is the courageous act of embracing who we truly are without pretense or performance. It is not about isolating ourselves in individualism, but about fully showing up in the world as we are, flaws, strengths, and all. The authentic self does not reject humanity, rather, it leans into it, recognizing that we are part of something greater than ourselves. When we are authentic, we acknowledge our shared human experience, the joys, struggles, fears, and aspirations that connect us all. In doing so, we create deeper, more meaningful relationships built on honesty and trust. To be authentic is to be fully human. It means embracing not only our individuality, but also our interdependence. We are not meant to navigate life alone, nor are we designed to wear masks that separate us from others. When we strip away the expectations and roles imposed by society, we discover that our truest self is one that thrives in connection, in relatedness. Authenticity fosters empathy, allowing us to see others as they truly are, without judgment or pretense. It reminds us that we are all walking a similar path, each seeking love, belonging, and understanding. An authentic self is not a distant, detached ideal. It is a lived experience rooted in honesty, vulnerability, and courage. When we show up as our true selves, we give others permission to do the same. We break down walls of fear and self-protection and replace them with bridges of compassion. The best version of ourselves is not the one that stands apart from humanity, but the one that embraces it fully, understanding that our imperfections are what make us real, relatable, and deeply connected to those around us. I'm not talking about the difference between extroverts and introverts. Both are equally excellent. Leaning into our membership in humanity does not mean losing ourselves. It means finding our most honest and grounded place within it. Authenticity allows us to contribute in meaningful ways because we are no longer acting out of obligation or expectation, but out of genuine passion and purpose. By embracing our true nature, we become not only more fulfilled individuals, but also more present, compassionate, and engaged members of the world. And in that we discover that our best self is not one that stands alone, it is one that stands together, fully and unapologetically human. To be clear, it's not only crime that removes an individual from humanity, it is unacceptable for someone on the authenticity journey to deliberately disrupt their workplace with negativity, to purposely cause dissent in family groups, hurt our friends, gaslight others, vandalize the community, participate in violence and hatred, or other such actions all in the name of leaning into our authentic self. Thinking the ends justify the means is not an excuse for monstrous or inhuman behavior. The noble desire for change can be accomplished without violence or vicious behavior. On the other hand, I am not suggesting that to be an authentic self you must be perfect, angelic, or some kind of robotic goody-goody. Every individual is unique and just that individual. The path you choose has endless possibilities shaped by your seven steps and your core values. Now you're adding your attributes. As you look in the mirror of true scene and identify your attributes, you gain the discerning power to know what is a strength and what is a weakness. You will recognize the strengths that you want to nurture and promote in yourself and the weaknesses that you want to eliminate. Some weaknesses might be minor, just little things that you wish weren't part of your character. As an example, perhaps you wish you were more punctual. Punctuality is a great attribute, but in the grand scheme of things, it's not a moral failing if you aren't punctual. Still, it might be high on your list of personal improvements. On the other hand, maybe you wish you didn't gossip. That's a more serious weakness, one that impacts relationships and trust. Do you see how this works? This is a powerful and positive process. As you refine and celebrate the best aspects of your unique, authentic self, you become a stronger, more vibrant version of who you were meant to be. Each discovery about yourself sends out ripples of change, allowing you to embrace your individuality with confidence. Maybe when you explored the list of attributes, you discovered that you are patient, a peacemaker, adventurous, classy, passionate, curious, swanky, punctual, and warm-hearted. The beauty of this self-discovery is that it allows you to let go of the need to compare yourself to others. You don't have to be like everyone else because you aren't like everyone else. You're splendiferous and it feels good. What you have learned about yourself influences every aspect of your life, the way you dress, the places you visit, the activities you engage in, and the relationships you cultivate. Remember, your path isn't what happens to you, it's how you process it. So far, you have embraced the seven steps of the path thinking, feeling, believing, acting, imagining, connecting, and recalling. You enlarged your path by stating your core values, and they are part of your true self by pointing your path of authenticity to your true north. Now you have a tool by mindfully going to the woods to mentally formulate your attributes. Then you practice the rule of three in order to be the best of yourself. All of these functions are about finding your true self. You have now moved on beyond simply walking the path. You are actively architecting your journey by stepping into your woods, gazing into the mirror of true seeing, and committing to the discipline of the rule of three. You have claimed your role as the deliberate author of your own story. This process of transformation is not a frantic sprint to perfection, but a steady, compassionate return to your authentic self, a version of you that is not only unique and irreplaceable, but deeply connected to the heart of humanity. Carry the clarity you found in your sanctuary into the world today, stay grounded in your values, and continue to show up as the hero you were always meant to be. As you step back from this moment of contemplation, which of your three chosen attributes will be the very first ones you put into practice today?