What Real Purpose Actually Feels Like

"The Momentum Coach Podcast exists to remind every midlife woman that her life is not over, it is just beginning. 

We gather each week around the real conversations about identity, purpose, love, faith, money, health, and becoming because we believe that the woman who has spent decades showing up for everyone else deserves a space to finally show up for herself. 

Through honest conversations, hard-won wisdom, and the courage to live out loud, we are building a movement of women who refuse to stay small, refuse to play it safe, and refuse to believe that their best days are behind them. 

This is not a podcast about surviving midlife. This is a podcast about owning it. Because midlife is not a decline. It is the most powerful chapter of a woman's life. And every woman deserves someone in her corner telling her so." Dr. Novice McDaniel, The Momentum Coach 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:15

Welcome to the Momentum Coach Podcast. This podcast was born out of everything that I have survived. And everything that I believe you deserve. It is for the woman who has spent decades showing up for everyone else. And is finally the woman who is finally ready to show up for herself. The woman who has been through it, who is still standing, who knows deep down that there is more, that there is so much more waiting for her on the other side. Every Wednesday morning, we gather here. We gather here for real conversations about identity, conversations about purpose and faith, about love, money, health, and becoming. Not the polished, watered down version, not the version that makes everyone comfortable, but the real version, the raw version. Because you have been through too much. I've been through too much and come too far for anything less than the truth. This is not a podcast about surviving midlife. This is a podcast about owning midlife. New episodes every Wednesday morning on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and at Elevation Life Coaching dot com slash podcast. And while you are listening, download the Momentum 365 app at Momentum365.today, your daily companion for building unstoppable momentum. Now let's get into today's episode. Let's get into today's episode. Let's move. It is one of the most talked about concepts in personal development. Find your purpose. Live your purpose. Die having fulfilled your purpose. And yet, for most women, I know purpose feels like something just slightly out of reach, like a word they recognize, but a feeling they can't quite locate. They know they're supposed to have a purpose. They know the purpose is supposed to drive them. But when they go looking for it, for the purpose, really looking, they find something closer to confusion than clarity. Is it my career? Is it my family? Is it something I have not done yet? Is it too late to find it? And did I miss it somehow? Today I want to completely reframe the way you think about purpose. Because I believe that most of us have been looking for purpose in the wrong places, looking for it in the wrong way, and measuring our purpose against the wrong standard. I'm Dr. Novice McDaniel, the Momentum Coach, and this is episode eight of the Momentum Coach podcast. Episode eight, what real purpose actually feels like. Today we're going to find your purpose. Not the Instagram version, but the real version, the real one. Here is the version of purpose we've been sold. You have one singular calling. It is dramatic and clear and unmistakable. It probably involves doing something extraordinary that the world can see and the world can celebrate. It arrives in a lightning bolt, a lightning bolt moment of divine inspiration. And once you find it, everything clicks into place and life becomes meaningful and life becomes easy. I call this the purpose myth. And it has paralyzed more women than almost anything else that I know. Because most people never find or never have that lightning bolt moment. Most people don't have that one singular calling. And most meaningful lives are not built on dramatic situations. They are built on quiet, consistent, consistent choices made in the direction of what matters. Here is my definition of purpose, the one I want you to carry with you. That purpose is the intersection of what you uniquely are, what you genuinely move towards, and what genuinely moves you, and what the world around you needs. That's it. Not a job title, not a grand statement, not a five-year plan, the intersection of who you are, what moves you, and what is needed. And here is the most liberating thing I can tell you about that definition. You already have all three ingredients. You already have all three ingredients. You just may not have connected the dots yet. You need to connect them. So now I want to talk about something that nobody really talks about enough. Purpose changes. I'll say it again. Purpose changes, it evolves. The thing that gave your life meaning at 30 may not be the thing that gives it meaning at 50 or 60. And that is not failure. That is called growth. In your earlier years, purpose was often outward. Build the career, raise your children, establish the life, establish the life. The energy of early adulthood purpose is largely about doing and achieving and becoming. But from a completely different place. It becomes less about what you can build for yourself and more about what you can give from yourself, less about proving, more about contributing, less about arriving, more about being fully present where you are. The women I know who have found profound purpose in midlife, those women did not find it by looking harder for some elusive calling. They found it by paying attention to three things to the voice of God is one, what makes them come alive, what breaks their heart about the world, what they uniquely, because of everything they have lived, are positioned to offer. Those things together is purpose. And for a woman who has survived what you have survived, what we have survived, who has lived what we have lived, who carries the wisdom and the scars and the hard-worn clarity of decades of real life, the intersection of those things is more powerful than you can imagine. More powerful. Let me walk you through four questions that I believe are the most powerful purpose-finding tools available. I want you to sit with each one. I don't want you to rush, don't edit. Just sit with each one. Question number one: What would you do if you knew you could not fail and nobody was watching? Remove the audience. Remove the pressure of success or failure. What would you spend your time doing? What would you create? What would you build or say or give? That answer, the one that rises up when the pressure is removed, is one of the clearest signals of your purpose available to you. Question number two. What do people consistently come to you for? Not what you think you're supposed to be good at. What do people actually seek you out for? Is it advice? Is it comfort? Your perspective or your practical help? Is it your creative ideas or emotional support? The things people consistently bring to you are things they recognize in you, even when you have not fully recognized them in yourself. Question number three is what breaks your heart? What breaks your heart? Purpose is almost always connected to pain. Not your pain exclusively, though that is often part of it, but the pain that you cannot look away from in the world. The injustice that that makes you angry, that makes you passionate, the suffering that makes you want to do something, the gap between what is and and what could be that you cannot stop thinking about. What breaks your heart is often pointing directly at who at what you are here to heal.

SPEAKER_01 10:38

Question number four.

SPEAKER_00 10:40

What would you regret not doing? Imagine yourself at the very end of your life. Looking back, what would you grieve about leaving undone?

SPEAKER_01 10:51

What would you wish you had said, created, or given? What would you wish you had tried to become?

SPEAKER_00 11:02

That grief, imagine now, is one of the most clarifying purpose compasses there is. The answers to these four questions held together would give you more clarity about your purpose than any personality test or career assessment ever could. I want to leave you with something today before your momentum move.

SPEAKER_01 11:29

Purpose is not something you find and then have. It is something you live your way into.

SPEAKER_00 11:37

It reveals itself through action, through showing up, through trying things and paying attention to what comes alive on the inside of you when you do. One choice at a time, one conversation at a time, one project, one act of service, one creative risk, one honest step in the direction of what matters to you. And as you move, it clarifies. The path becomes clearer the further you walk in it. Not before. Begin anyway. Begin with what you have. Begin with what you what you know. Begin with the one small thing in front of you that feels most aligned with who you are becoming. And trust that purpose, real, lived, meaningful purpose, will meet you on the road. Now for your momentum move. For this week, it is to answer the four questions that I gave you today. Answer them in writing, in as much depth as you can. What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail and nobody was watching? What do people consistently come to you for?

SPEAKER_01 13:19

What breaks your heart?

SPEAKER_00 13:23

What would you regret not doing? Sit with them all for. Sleep on them. Come back to them. And then look at your answers. What themes emerge? What keeps showing up? Where do your answers intersect? That intersection is your purpose pointing its finger right at you. Don't look away from it, move toward it. Thank you so much. Thank you again for going deep with me today on the topic of purpose. Purpose changes. Purpose is not found in a single podcast episode, but it can be nudged, it can be clarified, it can be brought a little closer. And I hope today did that for you. Next week we're getting practical. We're talking about the daily habits and non-negotiables of women who move through life with intention and power. The routines, the rituals, the small daily choices that compounded over time create extraordinary lives. Episode nine is going to be one that you return to again and again. I promise you that. Make sure you subscribed. Purpose is not something you find. Remember that. It's something you become during your life's journey. God has already given it to you. We just have to walk it out. And before I let you go today, I need you to do a few things for me, if you would. Number one, if this episode has moved something in you, I want you to share it. Please tag a woman in your life who needs to hear this. Send it to her directly. Post it on your page. Do whatever you need to do to get this into her hands. There is a woman who needs to hear what we heard today. And you might be the only person who she will accept it from. Number two, please leave us a review. Leave us a review on Spotify, on Apple Podcasts, and wherever you listen to your podcasts, it takes about 60 seconds and it helps other women find our show. Every review is a woman who gets reached. Please take 60 seconds and leave us a review today. And then number three, I would like for you to subscribe. Subscribe and listen to new episodes every Wednesday, every Wednesday morning. Find us on Spotify. You can find us on Apple Podcasts. And again, wherever you listen to your podcast. Or you can go directly to our website at elevationlifecoaching.com slash podcast. Everything is waiting for you there. Number four, we're almost there. Download the Momentum 365 app at Momentum365.today. It is your daily companion for building unstoppable momentum between episodes. Free to access, built just for you, and it is available right now at Momentum365.today. Number five, grab your copy of my new book, Momentum 365. It is 31 days of prophetic alignment, AI activation, and digital wealth. Available right now on Amazon and available at elevationlifecoaching.com. 31 days, one decision a day, a completely transformed life. Number six, if you are ready to go deeper, if you have been listening to this podcast, the Momentum Coach Podcast, and you've been thinking, I need someone in my corner, someone who will tell me the truth, who will hold me accountable and champion my becoming with everything that she has. I want to be your coach. I work with women who are done talking about change and ready to actually go out and make it happen. Women who have been through it, women who are still standing, women who know that there is more waiting for them in life and are finally ready to go out and get it. To go out and make it happen. If that is you, I would be honored to work with you. Visit ElevationLifCoaching.com to learn more about coaching with me, the momentum coach, or reach out to me directly at Hello, you can email me, hello at elevationlifecoaching.com, and let's find out if we are a good fit. And then finally, if you or someone you know would like to support this podcast. As a sponsor, we are actively seeking partners who believe in the power of midlife women. Reach out at hello at elevationlife coaching dot com, or you can also visit the website, elevationlife coaching dot com slash podcast, for our full media kit. We would love to have you in our corner. I'm Dr. Novice McDaniel. I'm the momentum coach. I'm the Chancellor of Providence Christian University. I'm a best selling author and the author of more than 10 books.

SPEAKER_01 19:28

Now, let's move.