The NJ DAD Podcast
The NJ Dad Podcast is where fatherhood meets humor. Join Andrew Parise for honest conversations about parenting, marriage, work, friendships, and the everyday chaos of suburban family life. Some episodes are solo, some feature guests, but they’re all built around one idea: being a better dad doesn’t mean taking yourself too seriously. Whether you’re changing diapers, coaching Little League, navigating date night, or just trying to survive another trip to Costco, you’ll find relatable stories, practical perspective, and plenty of laughs along the way. New episodes every Thursday.
The NJ DAD Podcast
Getting Power From Comedy (with Caleb Zeringue)
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SPEAKER_01This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. You think you know a browser, but Gemini and Chrome, that's new. It can help you with practically anything on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration blog, or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks. Gemini and Chrome is here for it. Ready to make anything online make sense. There's no place like Chrome. Check responses, set up required compatibility and availability varies 18.
SPEAKER_02Dad was gone, mom would drop me at nursery school, we'd walk down the street, we'd see all the shop owners. Joe would come out, he would tell us about his weekend at Fire Island with Roger. And so I didn't know what the hell was that meant. Like they're really good friends. That's great. But it was like his roommate. His roommate. It was what it was, you know. Hey, welcome to the fatherless cheat sheet. I am Andrew, your host, your fatherless friend, your Miller Light of Mentors, your quasi-big brother. I like to try to help you out with what's going on with the stuff that I learned along the way and didn't learn and screwed up, screwed up again, and here we are. We have a fun show today. We're talking to Caleb Zarang. He's a comic, he's a writer, he's a producer based in the San Francisco area. And we talk a lot about using that comedy as a protective shield. Something I've always done my whole life since I was a kid. Sort of redirecting some of that attention off of myself into something funny. And truth be told, I would often turn the joke onto myself to try to beat somebody to the punch. To this day, I use self-deprecation all the time. My wife doesn't like it. Don't talk about yourself like that. Well, if if I don't do it, someone else is gonna do it. And I'll at least be funny. So that's why I try to do that. And and when it comes to comedy as well, especially stand-ups, what I enjoy about stand-ups is that you know they're kind of taking their stuff and they got a lot of it, as as d everybody does. Everybody's got stuff. And they lay it out there for you and they do it in a funny way and in a relatable way, or good comic, I should say. And it makes you it just it can take the air out of sort of whatever, whatever's going on in their life. It's therapeutic when you can get up on stage and do that. And and Caleb's no exception. He's a very entertaining, funny comic, and he he talks very about some raw, real stuff about his life. And he was kind enough to come on and share some of that with us today. So I hope you enjoy it today on The Fatherless Cheat Sheet. All right. I'm really excited to have Caleb Zarang here. Very funny, very entertaining comedian with a lot of life to talk about, and I'm really excited to have him. I appreciate his time. Caleb, how are you? I'm well. How about you, Andrew? I'm doing great. Thanks for joining us on the Fatherless Cheat Sheet. And what I what I noticed about your comedy, sort of diving, diving way in, you speak so frankly, and you you you you know, I really I love that about when comedians can really tell their story in in an effective way, but in a way that some of the stuff is is is heavy stuff, but you really make it light and accessible for the audience, and I appreciate that. I want to hear I want to hear from Louisiana, I want to hear about dad, I want to hear about all this stuff if you if you're ever talking about it, because it makes it makes for a great comedy. So so tell us about yourself and and you know your start and comedy, all that good stuff.
SPEAKER_04Well, I was really trying to bum people out, so I'm sad that it made you happy, unfortunately. Um yeah, I uh it's really funny to hear people talk about my comedy because I I have done a few podcasts on it now, and I'm like, oh yeah, people listen, you know, like they watch it and they listen. And I'm like, oh, I thought that was just for me whenever I'm up there most of the time. Um, so thanks for watching it. Sure. Uh yeah, I had somebody come up and they were like, you know, I went through a divorce too. And I was like, how did you know it? And they're like, you said it on stage. And I was like, right. Great. Um, yeah, I got into comedy like most good comedians after a divorce. Uh and so I was kind of just really feeling sad, like literally just laying in the bathtub, thinking, like, man, I really don't feel great about myself. I hate myself. I hate what's going on in life. And then I was like, I don't want anybody else to feel like this. Yeah. Um, and I was just kind of thinking, what do I like doing the most? It's when I'm with a group of friends making them laugh. Basically, how do I use comedy to make them feel less shame and pain for all these different things going on in their life? So that's how I got into the world of comedy.
SPEAKER_02And and glad you did, because you know, you're you could hear the laughs from the crowd. And I think that when someone, not everybody's not uh nobody's comfortable doing comedy, nobody's comfortable speaking in front of a crowd. It's like one of the biggest fears, you know, next to rats and the apocalypse. So when when you're you have the ability to go up there and and and be vulnerable and share your story, and people say, Oh, wait a minute. Yeah, I went through that thing. And he's he's make he's making light of it so they can leave sort of with that good feeling you made them feel good about that thing. So it's not it's not an easy thing to do. And you're and boy, I love your energy on stage.
SPEAKER_04You're just you're just upbeat. It's really I'm I'm blackout the entire time just from anxiety. No, uh you know, it's not easy.
SPEAKER_02It's it's not easy to get up there. It's it's not because you're you're thinking about you're you're trying to get laughs. I've done some open mics, I don't do a ton of stand-up. Yeah, but it's uh, you know, first of all, you go to an open mic and this it's three other guys that hate your guts and they don't want you, they don't want to see you be funny.
SPEAKER_04It's the saddest place in the world as an open mic, I would say. Yeah, yeah. It's not not easy. If you go to an open mic, go to a real show and you'll feel better about yourself afterwards, I think.
SPEAKER_02100%. If you could crack that stage and you have, and you have a lot of fun stuff going on. But I want to talk to you, because you again you speak so frankly about about even even when you grew up, you grew up in the South and and the the bullying and things like that and stuff with your dad. I mean, you know, I think all I think most comedy does come from a place of pain. Do you do you sort of feel that way? You take from some of those other experiences?
SPEAKER_04Yeah, it's for sure. I mean, like I don't I have kind of like a fractitious relationship with my dad, which is why this is such an interesting podcast to me. Um I he wasn't present much in my life, and he cheated on my mom on and off a bunch of times, left, got multiple women pregnant. Um, but I think like the really interesting thing is his dad was similar to that, and of course he's coming from his past background in trauma. But what I learned in that family is like you use comedy to make everybody feel better, and and also a way to avoid feelings, haha. You know, right? So it's a good balance between the two of them, honestly.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, totally. And it's like it's that it's that armor that you prepare yourself with. And my my wife gets mad at me all the time because I'm one of the most self-deprecating people. Yeah. But as a as a kid growing up without a dad, I was husky. It was just armor for me. It was like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna beat you to the punch. I'm gonna I'm gonna make fun of myself first so you can't hurt me. And it's right.
SPEAKER_04And are you from New York? You're from yeah, I saw you went to a school in Syracuse, but where are you from originally?
SPEAKER_02Oh no, I didn't know I didn't. I'm from uh New York City, Brooklyn, New York. I live in Jersey now. I didn't go to Syracuse, no, that wasn't it. Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_04Then my AI was a liar. So I sincerely apologize, you know?
SPEAKER_02I would I would have killed to go to Syracuse, though. Great communications. Uh they wouldn't have let me in there, you know.
SPEAKER_04I was like, you you look Italian, you've got the voice. You have such a good voice, by the way. I'm such mine is so faggy. Thank you. You know, so you know. Thank you. No, that's that's very East Coasters, I think, are similar and like to Southerners, like you just tear each other apart and stuff. That's why I don't do so well in SF. I'm a little too harsh on the people here compared to New York.
SPEAKER_02Right. I got you. So and how how is that sort of like growing up down south, now living in San Francisco, and like what how do the two compare? When did you move out there, by the way? Uh were you was it a long time ago or recent?
SPEAKER_04Well, I have a kind of newer joke that's like I uh I've lived in 16 different states actually because my dad served as a member of the bipolar community. So, you know, we've moved all around. Um but I've been in San Francisco the longest I've ever lived anywhere. 11 years now.
SPEAKER_02So that's a good clip. That's a good yeah, that's pretty good. And in the city from New York. I was a nurse in New York, actually. So no kidding. Jeez, do you ever do any any not that it's always funny, but did you do you ever do any material on that? Because that's gotta be quite interesting.
SPEAKER_04No, I was actually just thinking I need to start doing it because uh yeah, one thing I wish my dad would have taught me is like financial management. And I have a ton of student debt. Uh, and so I kind of am like, man, I should have gotten a tech sooner because that's my day job now. You know, I could have paid off all my bills deciding a button color. Instead, I was a dumbass saving lives, you know, like idiot.
SPEAKER_02How dare you?
SPEAKER_04I know. So yeah, then and then I had like New Yorkers come up and be like, you know, my son went to Julia and his his friends having people from Grindan and he's fucking them all the time. And I'm like, what is going on? Your dad is in a coma, sis.
SPEAKER_02You know, they're smoking a parliament in the room, you know. It's like you can't smoke in the in the room.
SPEAKER_04I'm too gay to know what a parliament is, I have to be honest. But I appreciate it.
SPEAKER_02This is a cigarette. This is a cigar. But no, it's uh no, that's I uh you should definitely write about being a nurse. I could only imagine what was going on. I mean, it's just crazy. And and again, you know, why you're I think your comedy hits is because you're taken right from directly from your life almost and what it feels like too is you do it in such like a oh what's the word I want to use, like effervescent way. It's like, did it happen t today? You know what I mean? Like, did this thing happen today? It's good. It's it's like relevant. And I think when you can do that, when you can take that day, that's when people really sort of that's a connective tissue comedically to things when you're just going, here, I'm gonna open my chest, I try to make it funny, and then you're gonna look inside and see what's going on. So, you know, and it's it's uh and it's all it's all from it's all from when we were kids, man. You know, it's all this stuff, all that pain and all that stuff is just is it's amazing the indelible mark that that things from childhood sort of leave on you. It's it's sort of unbelievable.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I think like what I really want to lean into, I think what I initially use comedy for is like in a way to attack back and get power, which um is it can be useful whenever somebody's attacking you. But like what I really want to use it for in Aspire is like uh how do I show my pain so that you can like also show your pain and we can both connect on that level, you know. Like, how do I make fun of my foibles and all of my faults and all that stuff as well, rather than everybody else around me, you know?
SPEAKER_02Sure. Yeah, exactly. And just get on board and let's do this thing together because you know, and I've learned so much even from doing this show and just saying, hey, we're all, I mean, we're all kind of fucking screwed up, right? I mean, in in one way, shape, or form. And I think the the people I don't trust are the people that walk around saying that they're not.
SPEAKER_04I know, right? I trust a comedian way more than most people because I'm like, you're gonna tell me every terrible thing about yourself. Like if you act like you're so put together, I'm like, I don't trust you at all. At all. Not one bit.
SPEAKER_02No, that's a facade, that's all bullshit, and I say it constantly on this show. And I think that, you know, when you get in the trap of doing that, it just it doesn't get you anywhere, and you can't you can't really make any kind of human connections with anybody, and you can't even you can't help anybody either. I mean, so it's it's it's all interesting. It's all above my pay grade. I'm not uh I'm not like any kind of I'm not qualified to even have this conversation, but I'm just saying. But uh it's it's comedians comedians are really interesting and can be impressive people because you're you're taking this thing, you're you're taking your experience, you're doing the scary thing that most people couldn't even think about doing, and and you're you're trying to it it's a worldview, it's an outlook that's interesting to me. When you can take any story that you go through in your daily life and you can extrapolate that and take that story, you have a uh uh a joke about about Mimaw, and it's the the punchline is really is funny. What's the word? I won't know, no, no. But I almost like you know No, it's like you just like you kind of go, yeah, we're we're laughing with you, but at the same time, that that happened to you, and it sucks. Yeah. And it and and to be able to sort of to to put that again, take that pain and put it into comedy. Again, the the the comedy and drama of everything, the the juxtaposition is there. So you know, what's your what's your what's your like joke writing process? Like take me through so I know you're a writer as well in writing plays and things like that. Like how do you get started and ideate and all that stuff?
SPEAKER_04Yeah, it's um it's interesting because I think like uh comedy can be often like a like for and this is not a bad thing. I actually like a straight male sport, which I think a lot of men are taught to be very isolated, right? And do everything on your own. Otherwise, it's not worth it. I mean, like, yeah, I'm gay, but I'm still a man, so I got that raising too. Um but it's so a lot of com comedians will say, Oh, I gotta write my own and I gotta do my own thing. I actually was lucky enough to study with Heather Pasternak starting out. Um she was just on Funny AF, the Kevin Hart like comedy show, which is really cool. Cool. Yeah. Um and she's always said comedy is a team sport. And so that's like been something that I keep with me. And so I take classes all the time. I'm in classes with other comedians, and we help each other write. And I think that's like if you want to do this as a career, if you ever want to be in like a writing room, you have to learn how to write with people. So that's been really impactful for me. Um, so that's one mechanism I would say. The other is uh another thing that I learned, Steven Rosenfield, also in New York, he's fantastic, is like if you're talking, you're writing. So if I make you laugh with something, I'm gonna take a note on it, right? Like, so walking around, just talking to myself, looking like a crazy person, I just hoff a bunch of cold brew and I'm like making random things. I'm like, faggot, poppers, you know, like around the neighborhood. My neighbors are like, there he is again, that that old chum, you know. So I think it's a bit of like giving myself enough time and then bringing it to friends for critique and like going back and forth. I'm still figuring out what's best for me, but those are the two systems I like the most right now.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I mean, that sounds it sounds very, very uh sustainable, I think. Though, you know, that and that's going to be. Yeah. No, I mean, I just mean, you know, when I write as well, uh, it's it's like I have uh just a billion notes in my phone. It's an exaggeration. But my point is, it's like so many jokes have died in my phone, dude.
SPEAKER_04So many jokes.
SPEAKER_02No one will ever see them. You know, and that's but that's isn't that cool? It's almost like it's almost like a a diary of sorts or a journal. You just you put it in there, and it if it doesn't make you laugh, and then you go, ah, no one ever has to see this. But you you you let this you let that steam out in that moment and you take you take that thing. I always find, I always find that when I'm sort of uh sometimes I'll turn into a house cat if I have projects that I'm working on, writing this and that. And if I'm not out in the world, I'm not writing good jokes. It just it has to because that's when that that thing just hits you, and you know, someone does something ridiculous in the parking lot of an acme, and you go, okay, I've got to write this thing down because that that's you can't even make it up.
SPEAKER_04I'm looking at my text, I text myself a lot ideas, and then I almost never go back unless they're really good. Um let's see, what is the one that uh I did recently? There was something where I saw a play about like uh oh, this is not gonna be funny if I can't get it. Let's see, it's on my phone.
SPEAKER_02Take it.
SPEAKER_04So yeah, do you text yourself ideas?
SPEAKER_02I do. I usually, once in a blue, I'll do a text, but I just the notes, the notes in my phone. Uh there used to be used to be a cocktail napkins. I used to have I'm not getting a Rolodex. Um Are you in the mob? Like please don't. No, that's just that's a no, I would never. You got the hair.
SPEAKER_04You got the great hair for it, too. You know? Thank you. I just got a hair transplant because I'm so jealous of yours, you know.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. No, it looks great. You just you know whatever, but it's not grown in yet. It's not there yet. All right. You can you could when you when you come back on the show down the road, it'll be all you down to my ass, you know. This buff will be perfect. Oh, is that you're gonna go you're gonna go real long? You're gonna what are you gonna do? High-end tight? What's going on?
SPEAKER_04I'm gonna get dreadlocks, actually. I think no, okay. Whatever you want. Isn't that okay?
SPEAKER_02Isn't that the yeah, isn't that the great part of life, though? You do whatever the hell you want. It's great. Whatever you want to do, I like to. That's what I like to do. Whatever the hell you want to do makes you happy. What the fuck is the difference? You know what I mean? No. Chill out everybody.
SPEAKER_04Let them do it. My God. Um okay, so this is like, oh, you know, another way I'll write is I go see shows, and that gives me a lot of ideas too, whenever I go see other comedians. Um it doesn't it's none of their ideas, but my brain will start working in the background. So, like, I think I may have heard something about like uh a man. Oh, yeah. Jessica Kirsten. Do you know her?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, of course. She's great. She's really great comic, yeah.
SPEAKER_04Absolutely murdered at the Castro Theater. She was talking about as a lesbian, she faces a lot of like men back in the day saying, you know, you're just a lesbian because you haven't had the right dick. And I was like, you know, nobody says that about like gay men, like, you haven't had the right pussy. They're like, it doesn't work for them. They're like, they're fine, they know what they want, they're good. And I was like, that's messed up, you know? Like I think it's funny, it doesn't work the other way, you know.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, and the thing is like that, I'm sure someone made that horrible comment to her. And that's where that joke came from. And she, I mean, she she kills. I mean, she's really funny, so super sharp, and that wit. Uh, but that again, it just that the beat the drum, but like that's it comes from just horrible shit that people say or do, right? It's just that that pit of despair, if you will. And you gotta take that stuff and turn that, you know, chicken shit in the chicken salad or lemon lemonade, whatever. Whatever food, food euphemism. I think that good comics do that. Yeah, I think so.
SPEAKER_04I think uh it doesn't always have to feel terrible, I would say, too. I think like there's like the thing of comedians are fucked up. Um, I don't believe that. I think it's that we're just more open with like being messed up, like we said earlier. I think we're just like, this is who I am, I'm not gonna hide it necessarily, you know. Um but I think like it doesn't hurt sometimes. I think comics especially see hypocrisy and like contradictions and point that out pretty well, which is one of the better parts of comedy.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, totally, I totally agree. I think you know, a lot of people are sort of uh resigned in life to just sort of sit back and and not comment. Well, now you have the comment section from the guy on the toilet bowl. Yeah, yeah. And that's it. No, I've never I I tell you, I tell you what, Caleb. I I take pride in the fact I have the the one the one bad comment I ever made, I'll say this, it was I went at it with uh with Blanton's whiskey, and I'll call them out. Because you can't get a bottle of Blanton's. Fuck them. So I went at it with their social media guy. It was like 2020. I'm not getting I remember so excited for the story.
SPEAKER_04Sorry.
SPEAKER_02I'm going at it with their social media guy. And the guy and I made a comment like, yeah, nice marketing strategy making the bottle so scarce that like an average Joe in COVID who just had a kid, me, can't get a bottle of his favorite whiskey. And they I kept putting the comment, they just kept taking it away, taking it away. But I I know, right? Anyway, Blanton's it's great whiskey, though, I will say. Yeah. But I I that's like the only negative comment I've ever made online because I don't believe in it. I believe in if I'm gonna tell you to go fuck yourself, I'm gonna get about a foot away from your face and then six inches.
SPEAKER_04That's a very New Yorker. Yeah. Yes, yeah.
SPEAKER_02That's I grew up in New York, you know, whatever, and that's what we do. But some of these, some of these uh comment jockeys, man, it's just it's I said I said on the show before, it is the land of the disenfranchised. That's all they have. You know, there's a great story by Robert Town, who wrote uh China Chinatown, and he he had another movie, and someone asked him, uh, why why do they curse so much in this movie? And he goes, Because these guys, that's all they had. That's all the power that they had. And I think that's what goes on a lot of times now. And as a comedian, you're putting yourself out there and and and the the comments and stuff, and you gotta just fucking ignore that stuff because they don't know shit about shit, you know?
SPEAKER_04It's it's that, or like sometimes you well, most of the time if you're a good comic, you keep control of the room, right? And so like people will challenge your authority. I don't like the lack of a better word, but like they'll challenge you, and like uh a big part of the game is figuring out how do you like keep control of the situation. And so, like, example, my partner on my new play, Jenny Zagrino, she has a thing from when she was heavier, and she's like, I'm fat. And people are always like, Oh no, and like they clam up, and she's like, I said I'm fat, not ugly, you know, like I'm still beautiful. stuff. Um and she's like, that's like going to a short good dude and saying, oh, you could be smart or so. I don't know. Butchering the joke. But somebody's like, you are fat and you can't change that, but you could change your or you can't change your height, but you can change your weight. And I was basically like, oh well, you sound short. Cause she said short dudes are stupid in the joke. Basically. And then like 400 people liked it. And I was like, we won. You got to win those changes.
SPEAKER_02That's it. I mean that's that's the new scale of scales of justice now, which is hysterical. That's not good, is it? No, it's not. No, it's not. It's not Caleb, it's not great.
SPEAKER_04But you know, we just everybody has to be a bad comedian now to win online, you know?
SPEAKER_02So I tell you what, no, no, you're doing you're doing great work. Tell tell me about what's going on now. You have a you have Drill Master, you have the uh the Luigi thing. Well like tell tell me a little bit about those projects.
SPEAKER_04Yeah well before that I just wanted to say I think it's so funny that your meanest thing you ever did online was like I want your whiskey. You know like yeah it's like such a nice person. Mine is so embarrassing. Somebody said this guy can't sing and he should kill himself. That's not what exactly what he said uh but like a review of Luigi the musical and I was just like I was a gay boy in the South and you're mean and this was my first play. And then I didn't realize it was going publicly to like the writer of the thing and I was like ah my bad. So you're doing much better than me. I've done okay I I did there there's a saying uh discretion is the better part of valor uh whatever the the hell that means but that sounds really smart really smart I I pulled it off because no believe me I'm not but but tell me tell me about uh you know your your your projects right now and sure uh yeah yeah um so the drill master is really exciting that's the play it's gonna be this Sunday May 3rd I'm sure I don't know if that when this will go out but um we'll do a New York reading so you'll have to come. Yeah but it is the mostly true story of America's gayest founding daddy. And so have you heard of Frederick Baron von Stuben? Have you ever heard of him? I I've not I've not but I'm definitely gonna Google him later and check this all out. He has uh Von Stuben Day in New York actually no kidding okay and like most people hear did he go to Syracuse is the question. He did not go to Syracuse but like most New Yorkers he retired in Jersey Okay. When he had kids he moved to the Burbs you know that's what you do. Yeah he is a he's a gay Prussian um that truly this is true Benjamin Franklin recruited him because we were getting our ass kicked in the Revolutionary war brought him over he was a huge and this I can say the word faggot um and he like had like a gay uh French chef he was polyamorous he had his little French dog and he showed up turned the entire tide of the war he wrote the military code of ethics we still use to this day and none of us know about him because they were just like hide him from history.
SPEAKER_02He's gay basically this is a story I did not know about I will check it out. That's interesting. So that's so that's May third May third this will probably won't come out before that but I'll what I'll do is I'll try to try to send something out about it. But that's uh that's that's really cool.
SPEAKER_04So you you you wrote that you co-wrote that with with Jenny Jenny's agree now yeah she's such an amazing comic she's been on um a Fallon and uh or sorry Conan Conan and Dropout and all that stuff. Cool uh I featured for her in Seattle and that's how we got connected.
SPEAKER_02So nice okay great and and how was that like what's the sort of what's the scale of the production and what's uh are you are you acting in that as well?
SPEAKER_04I am I am uh playing Hamilton Lin Manuel Miranda I'm gay this time because Hamilton was by and he did not mention that in that place I have words with him. He left that out okay I get you I got you but yeah we're we're doing it now for Netflix as a joke festival and then um we're looking to scale it to a Broadway production so that's the trajectory we say it's kind of O'Mary meets Hamilton um in that kind of category. Did you see O'Mary? Are you familiar?
SPEAKER_02I I'm not I did not see it but I am familiar I know what it is I'm hanging up this call right now I'm sorry okay I'll do all my homework yeah it's okay for me hey look I I'm gonna say I'll just say this I went to my nursery school was on Christopher Street so when I was a kid you in the West Village you know us you know yeah my mom would drop me off you know like I said my my you know dad was gone mom would drop me at uh nursery school we'd walk down the street we'd see all the shop owners Joe would come out he would tell us about his weekend at Fire Island with Roger and so I didn't know what the hell was that meant like they're really good friends. That's great. But it was like his roommate you know his roommate it was what it was you know meanwhile and I always say I look like Bert Nurney had a love child so what the fuck's the difference? You know what I'm saying? Love is love, man. So it is what it is. But but uh yeah I'll do all my homework afterwards. But no that's exciting. I'm happy for you. That's that's really exciting stuff. And it like it sounds like you have such passion for it and I think that's the most important thing about about when you're working on projects and and also the collaboration piece which is really you know resonates with me. I I have a a a writing partner of of uh 11 years and you know that it's one of my closest relationships. He's really been a mentor to me. Name is Matt and I I agree with you. I think that the best comedy our phone calls when we're just shooting the shit for two hours and a half or whatever and my wife's like mad dogging me because it's a Sunday night get off the phone. Yeah but I'm like no we're we we got something going here you start to do that little that little volley of of the you know that that seed turns into the idea and then the and then the place. And you and you're you're doing it right now. That's that's amazing man. Great.
SPEAKER_04Yeah yeah Jenny is a very generous and great partner and I don't know about you but like working in the creative world I'm just increasingly drawn to like what partnerships feel really safe and powerful because like you have to try a lot of bad stuff before you get to the good stuff and you need somebody that's not going to judge you or criticize. Like for me I'm always looking for somebody that's gonna yes and my idea you know like and try to make it better. So I'm very grateful for that.
SPEAKER_02Yeah there's a there's a a liberating nature to that because you're not afraid to go you're not afraid to say something really fucking stupid. You're not afraid to go some terrible idea no but I'm just no I'm just like working through the idea. And what what Matt and I always say we always say really bad example don't hold this against me.
SPEAKER_04Da da da we always say that constantly right yeah and well and in comedy I think it's like uh you're like oh that went a little over the line you know you can try it on a comic before you get canceled publicly you know like you gotta toe the edges with it a little bit you you don't want to do that at a dinner theater in Kansas City you know what I'm saying?
SPEAKER_02No, you don't want to get chased out of town you know no right right the pitchforks and then and then whatever. But yeah so so now I know tumultuous um relationship and this and that but what we do a segment on the show called My Old Man Used to say now it doesn't have to be from from your dad but is there any piece of wisdom even a father figure or somebody gave to you along the way could even you know whoever that that you is sort of stuck with you and and persevered all these years in your life.
SPEAKER_04Yeah my um mom did the extra like double work while my dad was in and out and my sister has cerebral palsy uh so she's been like she's been through like 13 surgeries and so a big theme that my mom always said the thing I'll always remember is like a person's a person no matter how small um which she got from Dr. Seuss I'm pretty sure but that was like a big theme of mine is like always try to treat everybody the same whether they're sure super rich or like uh super poor and I I did that as a nurse too. They have the private suites and they're like the king of Saudi Arabia is here. I'm like I don't give a fuck like he's gonna get his meds the same time as everybody else so that's something I took to heart. Um yeah I did ask them for the segment too by the way um if I can tell you some of their responses. Yeah yeah please okay so then they said uh my mom said always wear clean underwear apparently the ties to like don't get she was terrified of being in an accident and having dirty underwear because her mom told her never get in an accident with dirty underwear. So and she got in a really major accident and the first thing she said is like I'm sorry there's a hole in my underwear like they had to cut her out of the car and she's like there's a hole in my underwear is her first thing.
SPEAKER_02Oh jeez Yeah she's not wrong she's not wrong though that's a good one. She's not wrong. That's a very applicable life skill right there. How are you doing on it today? No I'm doing great.
SPEAKER_04I'm doing great and then uh my aunt said wish in one hand shit in the other see which one gets full faster. So that's a little Missouri for you. I don't really know what that means.
SPEAKER_02So but you know what that's that phrase is more of a feeling than anything else I get like I just felt that it's a it's it's a vibe. I felt that I like that one. That's good. That was great. And and what's your what's your mom's name?
unknownLori.
SPEAKER_02Lori. Lori okay Lori Lori knows Lori knows what she's talking about I will say yeah and I and I find you know I'm so sorry about your sister's struggles and all that. And I would say that um that and again now no no accident that you are a nurse and a caretaker because I think that when you go through that, when you're seeing someone dealt a really difficult hand, that's that's true empathy because you're you're sort of living and dying with that person's struggle. So I think again it all sort of goes into your comedy and and as you as you're worried about your your audience and things like that. And I think it's gonna suit you really well with these great projects and and this was this was great, man. It was really good to meet you and chat with you. I appreciate your time. Thank you Andrew I really appreciate it. You got it hopefully you come back on the show and and we'll see what's going on with Van Buren and the whole thing. I got a lot of Wikipedia and Googling to do tonight. Yeah yeah Van Stuben Van Stuben you're gonna welcome I'm sorry okay a lot of consonants I'll figure it out I'm a vowel guy usually at these Andrew all right okay everybody I hope you enjoyed that episode I sure did I I had a lot of fun talking to Caleb it was fun spirited and and just I love talking about writing and the processes and humor and all that stuff especially when its foundation is painful or dramatic. You know not that not that you want to laugh at that stuff but you have to laugh through some of that stuff or else it's it's not gonna work out for you. You're gonna have really a hard time parsing through some of those things. But it was really nice to have Caleb on I pre I really appreciate his time and his and his energy and it just it was a lot of fun. I had a lot of fun with him. His newest project the drill master right now is in staged readings at the Elessian theater in Los Angeles. I know he's taking that taking that around trying to develop that a little bit more get a a bigger audience for that and then uh he'll he's also a touring comic based in San Francisco so we'll we'll keep an eye out for what Caleb's doing. And as for the fatherless cheat sheet YouTube subscribe Instagram come follow me come say hello there's some funny stuff on there some fun stuff beyond the show and for the most part let's build this up a little bit tell your friends tell your aunt tell your uncle tell your cousins put put a put an email list out there with a link to the show for me. Help me out and we'll uh we'll try to grow this thing but until next time this has been the follow this