Worship From The Big Woods
Talkin' Worship and other Music stuff with Marc Ridgeway & Friends
Worship From The Big Woods
Podcast #4 Worship From The big Woods Guest: Kevin Wade
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Hello and welcome to Worship from the Big Woods Podcast, talking worship and other music stuff with Mark Ridgway and friends. We certainly hope you enjoyed this podcast today.
SPEAKER_01A mighty shaking or a raging fire. When you speak your word, other voices stand still, and there's no need to ask why. Not in violence like the form of man. You call my name the way no one can. I understand. I will worship you. I will wait on you. Happy for you. I will wish to do I will wait on you. I will worship you. I will worship you, I will wait on you. I'll be for you. I will worship you. I will wait on you. And listen to you still small voice. I will worship you. I'll be for you. And listen to you still small voice I will worship you. I will wait on you for you.
SPEAKER_02Our oldest son, Kevin Wade, is gonna share. He's written two books. I can't remember the title of both of them. Tell what's the title of both of them? The first one?
SPEAKER_00That was the first one. And then um Faithfulness in the Dark.
SPEAKER_02Oh my. It's it's wonderful. Uh I've never written a book. I'd like to write one one day, Lord willing. But um Kevin's a great uh uh son. He's uh been a pastor for many years, uh youth pastor and senior pastor. And um he's um out in the workforce now doing uh doing the work of the Lord and just working uh a job that God's called him to do. And uh just very proud of him and I think that what he says will be an encouragement to you guys out there. So uh so Kevin, how long um how long have you actually been involved uh or known the Lord? I mean, you know, you uh I kind of know that, but some people might not know that. So just a small little doesn't have to be long.
SPEAKER_00Well, it's um when I was nine years old, it's when I came to faith in Christ. And uh I remember uh being at church with mom. Mom would take us to church, um, a little small country church in South Jackson. Uh Jackson was kind of South Jackson was kind of a country town field back then, uh when I was younger. And um I was in this that small country church. I remember uh mostly uh just playing around and and sleeping during the sermons.
SPEAKER_02Uh like we all did.
SPEAKER_00Yeah I I did. Yeah, and uh but one Sunday was different. Um there was actually uh an older man who ran the soundboard in the back of the church, and he kind of took up with me when I was nine years old, just you know, he'd talk to me and stuff. And one one Sunday morning he actually said, He said, Hey, uh Kevin, why don't you come back here and help me with the soundboard? And I was I I thought, oh wow, you know, like I just a nine-year-old kid and all these buttons and knobs, and you know, and so I went back there and I was fascinating, wasn't it? Yeah, and I went back there and I sat down and and uh I didn't really do anything. I just kind of watched him and he would tell me, you know, turn this knob or something. I don't think the knob was really doing anything. But but uh But it gave you a a what a working knowledge of what sound running sound for anything really well he just kinda you know it's it it was just a kid looking at this like wow, you know, but but what the crazy thing that happened is that Sunday, um, I paid attention to the pastor. Like, you know, I'd I'd say I listened before, but I listened. Like and what what I didn't realize was I mean I know this now, but back then when when you were nine, like the Lord I really heard the gospel that day. Like I heard it not just with my mind and you know but but with my heart, like God would God you know He regenerated my soul that day is what happened. And I couldn't explain all the details and you know I responded at the uh during the invitation time and went down and met with the pastor and all that kind of stuff and I was baptized uh later. And from that day forward, I you know, things things really um just started uh you know, the Lord really just started to use that and and and show me, you know, as I was uh a Christian now and so I grew in that a lot. I've over the years I've you know, I've I've had those times and seasons where I wondered, I you know, oh, am I really a Christian? You know, I think we all go through those. Um but yeah, that's when I first came to faith in Christ and it was when I was nine years old, way back then. That's great.
SPEAKER_02I b um became uh well I I at first my first knowledge of the Lord really before I made a decision when I was fifteen. It was like when I was nine, and it was a Baptist church in Jackson, Mississippi, and uh I sat in there and I felt led to go forth. And this of course this was 1967, before way before you were born. Um about twelve years before you were born, I think. And uh I went to the front and then I was baptized, and uh my Sunday school teacher gave me a Bible, gave me a uh regular sized Bible. But a regular sized Bible. And I read it and uh I would I would read it here and there, but it it never did come alive to me because my heart wasn't in the decision. You know, I I I just I think I probably just made it because I just felt like I was supposed to do it, you know. Yeah. And uh it has to be uh you know, the Lord draws us and it it's his grace that draws us, it's not us drawing. It's his him him drawing it, you know. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? It's he does it. We don't do it, we just we just get to be involved in the match.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. And I think as a like like young kids, being a pastor and dealing with with kids, like, you know, kids don't fully understand all the details of of you know the doctrines and all the things that go on inside of salvation. So, you know, just I think so it's so easy for us to uh confuse when God like when we're really born again as a young kid, i it that kid as he grows up, it sometimes it things don't make sense uh a lot of times, and I think we you know, they might tend to doubt, you know, their salvation because of some things. But yeah, I I know what you mean.
SPEAKER_02I I just uh I wasn't ready. Some people say they've received the Lord when they were three or four or five. Right. Uh it just took me some time. But uh anyway, let's get back to uh if you don't mind, sharing a about your books and what they uh what maybe w what is said in these books and how uh how the Lord uh encouraged you to write 'em. And then once once you wrote 'em, how it it it may be a a release. And you don't have to go into the the total details. And you can just, you know, he can you can get his book on in on Amazon for sure. Amazon and what else.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, Amazon's uh the main place uh right now where they're all at. So yeah.
SPEAKER_02We'll we'll make sure and give the names before we and but if you would tell the the folks out there um what uh you know what inspired you to write them and then as you wrote did that did that kind of open some things in your mind and kind of give you um a piece you know about about certain things. I don't know, you know.
SPEAKER_00I I really didn't mean to write a book. Um I never intended to write a book. I don't I don't think um that was a goal of mine. You know, I never dreamed I'd write a book. Uh was just not something I thought I'd ever do, but um when uh there there came a point in in ministry uh uh over so much uh the stress of ministry and all the things that go on inside of that. And if you've ever been in in ministry, um whether it be pastor and you know, leading worship, uh youth ministry, whatever it is, uh and whether it be part time or full time, you know the stress I'm talking about. You know the the weight that you carry with that and um and there was just a lot of different things that added up and um I just got to the point where I I just couldn't do this anymore. Um I came to that place where um I I just walked away. And um a lot of that was just because I I finally ran I just came to the end of myself in in a in a way that it's hard to describe unless you've been been in those situations. But uh and and I went through uh years, um not not days or months or you know, uh a season, but a long season of really struggling and um struggling to feel like the Lord had turned his back on me uh and left me for dead is is really how I felt. Um and the best way I can describe it is um Elijah, you know, in First Kings chapter 18, he's he's calling down the prophets of Bel, you know, he's seeing the power of God move and then I in First Kings chapter 19, you know, Jezebel's got after him and he lost it and and he's you know falling on a rock and he's he's just he he can barely keep himself together, you know, and so that I don't know, that's I was in that place and um for a long season and and it was real difficult to see or or know that God was will still with me, that's that God was for me. Um and and through all that struggle, um the Lord showed up in in a powerful way and started to really stir my heart again and I started crying out to the Lord and I did it through writing. Um It's a great release.
SPEAKER_02It's like when I, as a musician, if I write a song, if I sit down and play the piano or the guitar and a song comes, it's like thank you, Lord. And that was a good, you know, that's a good release because we're we're releasing our gifts to the Lord. Yeah. And and and and he he delights in that. He delights in us giving to him, and you have.
SPEAKER_00And that's that's kind of what I just started having some real serious, honest conversations with God through, you know, and a lot of it came through just sitting down writing it out, you know, and and after Tom, what it what what happened was um a story developed, you know, and then I just started seeing it and I started trying to put it together and that um writing a book is you know, you you can write essays, you can write you know, put these these um stories uh in one sitting, so to speak, you know, things going on you can write your heart toward the Lord, but to put all that together is um you know, and uh make it in one one coherent book is is a lot of work. I just didn't realize how much that was and and how how you know to be able to do that it took a lot of.
SPEAKER_02He is a worker can build anything, he's built stuff for us at the house over here, put a roof and he's built a a um a shelter in the back of our uh our uh storage building. And uh you've got that mentality of of organizing and building, and so you're able to process that process that into a book. It's like I'm kind of that way, but I'm not I wish I was more like you in that way, but I do organize things musically and you know, write write music and stuff like that. So that's just it's just a lot of things.
SPEAKER_00You have your own gifts and that that's that's the thing, and the Lord gives us all differently and you know, and uh and I and I guess the way the Lord He He really stirred my heart to to try and help people, you know. I like to encourage other other Christians who may have gone through what I've what I've gone through.
SPEAKER_02A book can really do that because people have that and they they take it and read it and read it and read it and uh uh it gets it gets into it.
SPEAKER_00So it just you know, that's where that's that's how the the book writing started for me and then um a look inside the broken pastor in my first book was really just about my life story from from growing up and um and really you know as the Lord brought me to faith and and some of the real struggles I went through as a kid and a teenager. Um and then going into ministry and the the things the Lord taught me in ministry, the things I learned and and some of it I learned um the the hard way, some of it I learned uh through making a lot of mistakes, um, through not understanding things. And the Lord was always gracious with me, you know, through those things. And but I I really spoke in a raw way in the book about um you know, ministry in the church and the struggles I had and the you know the hard things, the hard decisions, the hard moments, you know, um the difficulties that you go through. And you know, there there there's even a chapter dedicated to, you know, I thank I thank God for allowing me to be pastor and the the blessings of being a minister, you know, in the church and the way that God uses that. So I don't want to discount, you know, that that truth, but but it's a hard work, it's a difficult uh thing, and so the Lord really uh let me write all that in a raw way, in a in a way that I felt like would connect with every Christian out there, you know, everybody's in a church and we we're part of a a body of believers and there's not any perfect church out there. Um, you know, there's everybody goes through all these different things um as a Christian, but so I I I wrote it in that in that way, so that hopefully it helps them. And I even have a kind of like a reflection questions and some scripture that for each chapter that kind of d draws people in and helps them, you know, examine themselves in light of what they've read and in this first book, right? In the first book, yeah. So that you know, I I I tried to really be uh mindful of it being um a sanctification tool, you know, for every Christian to have. So um so I think some people might see the title and go, uh look inside the broken pastor. Well, I you know, I'm not really interested in reading about a a pastor who uh stepped down and you know, things didn't work out or whatnot, and and I can understand that, but but the book is not really about that. It as much as it's about uh a a journey of faith, you know, and and a Christian that walks through all the different things of life and some of the hardships that you can face and and just being raw about that and the way that my family and and everyone really supported me and you know, brought me back to a place. The Lord ev eventually brought me back to a a lot better place. Um He woke me up. Um Elijah laying on the rock, uh wishing he were dead for the most part, and it's the Lord, right, that comes and cooks him breakfast, it seems, on the on the rock, you know, wakes him up and and it was like that. Me, like the Lord had to come and rescue me. Um, it wasn't me rescuing myself. Oh, I know. And um, and so that yeah, that's the first book. And then the second book, Faithfulness in the Dark, is really just a part two of that whole story. It really might a lot more details about my struggle and how the Lord was the one who was faithful when I was not.
SPEAKER_02Um He's always faithful, and that's it.
SPEAKER_00Like, you know, when I'm faithless, he's the one that's still faithful. And um that that book is really dedicated, and it's my dedication page is is written to Jesus and the one that didn't let go of me when I was when I had let go, I I was all but let go of him. You know, he was the one who came after me and held me close, and um, you know, and so I I I really dedicated that book to him. Uh although I'd say I dedicated the other one to him too, but um I'm just thankful for for Christ and and the ways that he loves us and the way that that you know when he comes after us, um, it's not with a a love that you know it is dependent on me in so many ways. You know, I think I think that's where we get lost in our human um you know, our human world that we live in. It's like the Lord's love is set on us, and it is set on us in a way that is is perfect, you know, and and um it comes after us when even when we stump stumble and struggle and um have hard hard things to go through. So so that that's it's a little shorter book than the other. So and I'm working on my ther a third book.
SPEAKER_02What's that gonna be?
SPEAKER_00Well, I don't really want to give away the details. How to build a house and how to how to change brakes on a car. Change brakes on a car.
SPEAKER_02By the way, guys, he is a grandfather, and uh, I'm a great grandfather, yeah. But he uh he's got three girls, one son-in-law, and uh one grandson, and one grandson, Colton. So it's uh anyway.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so it's that's a blessing. Yeah, that's fun. Um, but yeah, I think the third book is gonna be uh it's just something that uh has really been um a burden on my heart to to try and encourage and help people with. Um so I didn't I'll just leave it at that. I'm not gonna really I I hadn't really got into the details of of like a title for the book or anything like that. But um, but I the way that I've tried to write books, you know, I've read a lot of books, uh, but the way that I try to write is just it's just me and it's just raw and it's you know, you know, I'm I'm not trying to write so that I appeal to a certain uh a group, so to speak, or a certain denomination, or any of those type of things. I'm just I'm just being me and and trying to trying to sort out things in my own mind in front of everybody, you know.
SPEAKER_02I had heard a pastor say one time, Kevin, that uh uh the titles that we put on ourselves and denominations are either gonna fly off going up or burn off going down.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, right. Well, and also have you ever heard that. Yes. And uh I've heard a pastor say before if we if we got rid of all the denominations because of our our sinfulness, we would have them all back within 24 hours, you know. And I'm not I'm not poking fun. I know people have their denominations there in there.
SPEAKER_02There's many denominations that I I think that are I have some dear friends that are in different denominations, and I and I just praise God that we we have the fellowship, you know, and that's what that's what is important when we get to heaven, we're gonna we're not gonna think about that. And I I can't even imagine going to heaven.
SPEAKER_00Well it'll it'll all finally make sense. Some of the some of the um you know secondary um issues that we might disagree on. That those will all finally make sense to all of us at you know at one place.
SPEAKER_02So we'll know as we're known. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00At the end of the day, it's the you know, the gospel is what saves us. It's yes. The the gospel is is primary, it's you know, it's the main thing. We've got to keep the main thing the main thing and and not get caught up in the secondary things. Um and not to say secondary things don't matter, it's just that you know our our unity is is in the gospel in Christ. And so uh but I yeah, respectfully I can I can denominations we can have a bunch of different ones of those and and respectfully disagree and at the same time agree that the main thing's the main thing.
SPEAKER_02Of course, so yeah. Well, I can tell you that the three years, I think it was three years I led worship at at the same church you were a pastor, and I it was so refreshing. Well, that was fun. And we had a good time. I just know the Lord did a work in my heart, you know.
SPEAKER_00Well, and I I'm thankful for you too, because you're probably the most gifted that I have ever been around, the most gifted uh person musically um that I've ever seen, just to be able to do the things you do, have the talent you have. Um and at the same time, your heart is not to to take that and use it to glorify yourself. You want to glorify the Lord with it, you want to encourage other people with it. I mean the whole reason you're doing this podcast is so that you can encourage other people. Sure. Sure.
SPEAKER_02And that's our our life should be a song or a sermon or both, you know. And uh and I think that if we can uh if we can uh bleed, I guess you could use the word bleed Jesus or bleed when we're we're with people, bleed let it bleed over the love of Christ, the love of God to Him, you know. That's right. Uh and and I know uh you you and I and we both encompass people that in our jobs or whatever we're doing that don't know Jesus and don't know have a personal relationship with God. And um I just uh I think uh God will give us wisdom on how to do that.
SPEAKER_00That's right. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02It it doesn't have to and it doesn't have to be a sermon. We don't have to say, okay, sit down and I'm gonna give you a sermon, or we're gonna, you know, that type of thing. It's just it's your life.
SPEAKER_00That outside of you know, being in ministry and and in in my role, you know, this there was a sermon every Sunday. There was a sermon, you know, multiple sermons a lot of times. It's it's you know, I'm working to preach a sermon, and and those are important. Yeah. But in in my role now, uh a lot of times it it's a little different in the sense of uh it might just be an empty chair that I pull up and and have somebody sit in it. Sure. And I don't really preach, I just listen.
SPEAKER_02I love that. I love that.
SPEAKER_00And um, I sit there and listen and and and it's a timely, you know, a long season of getting to know somebody, having a relationship with them, finding out what where they are in life, what's going on, what you know, what they're dealing with, and and just loving them like Jesus would love them.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, and not be afraid to to to show that. Yeah. You would never catch me doing something like this. I just that way. And I now I th uh sometimes you you ask your mom, it's hard to get me to shut up.
SPEAKER_00Well, it's it's a good it's a good thing that you know you you're trying to encourage people uh in the Lord, and that's you know, using our our talents and gifts and you know, and even the wisdom that God's given us over our our time and you know in walking with him. Like we're using those things to try and encourage other believers. And and at the same time, those who don't know Christ, we're trying to, you know, really come to meet them where they are and bring the gospel to them, you know, and so and that that takes work and that takes time a lot of times. People just need to understand that, you know, a mission trip, uh, a mission trip mindset is we go over here and we, you know, we're only here for uh a few days and we share the gospel and we preach and we do these things and those are good, but in in reality, like your everyday, your day-to-day, the people you're around all the time, the people you see in the marketplace, you know, yeah, you you have an opportunity to to get to know them, especially in our culture, like in the southern Mississippi, you know, country culture. I mean, we get time to we can get to know people, and I think that's an important part of sharing the gospel.
SPEAKER_02So many things, Kevin, can divide people. I mean, you you know, as well as I do, uh m most times, especially nowadays, politics will will divide even Christians and believers. And uh I I believe we need to look past that and look and just you know, I love you as a person and as a that God made and and He wants He wants to love you and know you. The Bible says uh we're we'll be known as we are known in heaven. So you know, I want to know the Lord, but I want him to know me, you know. And so if we can show that love and show that uh uh uh concern to people that might, you know, be just you know they they might be going a certain way and still show the love of the Lord.
SPEAKER_00Oh yeah, that's I think, you know, politics, everybody has their own opinions. Um I have mine, and but at the end of the day, what what matters most is you know that we know Christ and that we we live for him, you know, and and honor him. And I think that's so it's so easy to get caught up in, you know, the cares of this world and all the things going on. And I'm not saying we shouldn't be, you know, faithful stewards of our lives and our sure our time and our votes and all that kind of stuff. I'm not saying that. But it is you know, it's easy to get caught up in those things and miss the main thing, you know, that we're alive to do, and that's you know, uh really carry the gospel, you know, to to everybody and and be a encouragement for them uh toward Christ. And so it yeah. But it's it's difficult, you know. It's a highly politicized culture we live in, and it is more more now than no matter what side you're on, you know, or or sides, there's more than uh two or three sides, even it's a bunch of sides you can be on, but but I want to be on Jesus' side. I want to be on the you know Christ's side.
SPEAKER_02Look what Jesus did, you know, and how he related to people uh going to a sinner's house and having a meal. You know, you you went to a sinner's house, or he goes and clears all the the tables in the money changers in the temple.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And uh, you know, it it's it's amazing how he wasn't he wasn't afraid to go uh to a people that needed him. Yeah, was not afraid.
SPEAKER_00His motives were the purest, so you know, trying to do the right things. So it of course we our our motives aren't the purest sometimes, you know, and we do make mistakes in that, but that's that should be our heart, be the same as Jesus, you know.
SPEAKER_02So yeah. Well, let's uh let's take a little break right now, and uh then we'll come back. Okay, okay. Kevin's gonna share uh some things that are that are on his heart. First of all, tell us um the titles of the book and where you how you can obtain it.
SPEAKER_00Sure. Um a look inside the broken pastor is my first book. You can just go to Amazon and and search for my name. Uh and say your name. Yeah, Kevin Wade. Or uh just a look inside the broken pastor. You can search for that, it'll be there. Or search your name. Yeah. Yeah. And then Faithfulness in the dark is the other book. So yeah.
SPEAKER_02Okay. Well, that is super, super, super good. And I'd I'd like you to share just real quick with the people, um, something that's on your heart and something that you feel like might encourage somebody, if you would.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, sure. Um, I think as we live in a performance-driven culture, uh, and and I would I'd say performance driven is impacted uh church ministry, uh impacted social media, it's just it's everywhere. Um, you know, as we see that and we live inside of that. Um as I write books, it's just a struggle I've had, and I know uh Christian, you know, artists and music uh musicians are gonna have the same struggle. Um it's when I think in my in my mind, as I write this book, as I'm working on this book, you know, I've got to sell so many copies, or I'm not gonna be successful. Or I gotta have so many people read this. And, you know, um if it doesn't become, you know, popular or they don't talk about it on social media as much as I want, then then all of a sudden it's tempting to, you know, in our pride, we just start retreating and and and and we might even talk ourselves into saying, what's the point? You know, what what what does it matter to write this book or or or write this song or do this podcast or or all those type of things? But at the end of the day, what we got to come back to is this it's really about honoring Christ with what he's called us to do in this in this season of our lives. You know, we we want to love him with that. Like I feel like write this book because the Lord's really put it on my heart to do this. That that's first, and then second is to love my love God, right? And then love my neighbor as my as as myself. And to love my neighbor, it's like I'm trying to help somebody else. I'm trying to encourage them, I'm trying to help them see uh how they can come through what I've been through, and and even the people that don't know Christ that that they can come come to know Jesus. And what if it helps one person?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's right.
SPEAKER_00What if what if all the what if all the effort, the time, and the energy and everything that I've done in writing these books, what if it's just one person that the Lord maybe brings to faith or or just encourages out of a horrible uh struggle of depression and despair that they find themselves in? What if it's just one person? Is it is it worth it? And and so Jesus would say, I believe. He would say, Oh yeah, it's worth it. Like you know, and so that I think that's what we have to come back to. So I just encourage anybody, you know, in your season of of whatever types of of things that God's called you to do in your life, um, go hard after it and know that the Lord is using it even if you can't see it or understand it. He's gonna use it, and he will he will help somebody because of it.
SPEAKER_02So that's awesome. That is awesome. Would you do it do us a favor and just lead us in a quick prayer? It doesn't have to be uh in King James English. Please don't do it that way. Yeah. No, you won't. But if you just just a quick prayer to and thank the Lord.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I will. So Lord, we just thank you, uh, most of all for your grace and your mercy. Um, that you would have that you would be mindful of sinners like us, that that you would not withhold your one and only Son, that you would send him to come after us, to, to bring us to faith, Lord, to bring us to to hope in Christ, to bring us to an eternal uh hope, Lord, that's that's everlasting. Um to show us that that we have a standing with with a holy God. Um Lord, we just thank you for that grace and that mercy in our lives. We don't deserve it. We don't deserve anything from you but your wrath, but because of Christ, we we are heirs and and we are Lord, we are so grateful for that. We just thank you for that that mercy. And Lord, I want to pray specifically for the the listeners of this this podcast. Um, Lord, that they might understand that God has them in a certain season of life. And and all the circumstances and things that they find themselves in are not are not out of order in the way that it might feel sometimes, but but they but you have them exactly in the right place at the right time so that you can be glorified. And and I pray that they would see that and and even if they can't see it, Lord, that they would just cry out to you. And as as you taught me, Lord, that that when I don't understand, and when I can't feel you, when I when I don't see, when I when I can't make sense of it all, that I would just fall on my knees and and and cry out to you, and that you you will you are there, and that you'll help us. And you'll point us in the right place, and that you'll put us in the right uh right mind that we need to get to, Lord. You you are working all things out um for your glory and and for our good, and we just need we gotta trust you in that. So I pray that they would, and I pray that you'd use them and bless them. Thank you for Mark and this podcast, and uh he's striving to honor you with his talents and gifts, Lord, and and encourage others. And I'm I'm so thankful for that. I pray that that you would work it out for your glory. And so in Christ's name we pray. Amen.
SPEAKER_02Amen. Good, very good prayer. I just uh uh am looking forward to the third book. What and uh that we don't know their title or anything, but yeah, look for it and uh keep it suspenseful right now, and we'll we'll we'll keep you guys updated. Thank you so much for listening today. Bigwood Studio is a full production music studio, offering film scoring, album projects, and demos. Listen to examples of our work at soundcloud.com. Search MarkRidgway. We have package deals to suit your every useful need in any style and join your music. Please call us at 601-260-1269 or email us at mark.com. We invite you to visit Big Woods Studios.
SPEAKER_01Have a great day.
SPEAKER_02Thanks for listening to Fort Just from the Big Woods Podcast with Mark Ridgway and Fred.