5 - Please Mount Me

Welcome back to the LOSERS podcast. In this episode Bo and Konner talk about the L's they took this week: Bo paid a Best Buy employee to mount his TV but the guy never showed up and Konner accidentally exposed himself at the beach in front of cool Brooklyn kids. They also discuss witnessing 3 teenagers subway surf, the Nick Fuentes & Hunter Biden debate, and a police officer being arrested for using Flock cameras to spy on their boyfriend. 

Click the link to see Bo and Konner perform at New York Comedy Club on July 31st @6pm!!! With special guest Tim Dillon!

Transcript

SPEAKER_06 0:36

Welcome to the Losers Podcast, everybody. I'm sitting back. Yes, it's Bo Bigelow sitting here with my co-host Connor Kinsley. How are we doing?

SPEAKER_05 0:46

Guys, welcome back to the pod. We were just, we have a few things to get into. I'm actually very excited to be doing this today.

SPEAKER_06 0:52

For the record, I'm always excited to be doing this. It's not a specific today thing for me. It's usually just I'm always excited.

SPEAKER_05 0:58

But some days I sit down, I look at you, and the only news we have to cover is Israel, and I'm like, and I'm like, can we please get something else? I've told you I don't want to die. Can we please cover something else? No, I'm kidding. But um, well, we're going right back into it. We're talking about fucking Hunter Biden.

SPEAKER_06 1:15

We're gonna start with we were just sitting here about to get the podcast started, and we looked out. We live in Brooklyn, so the subways are above ground, and there were three people riding the subway on top of the subway. And I've heard that's a thing, but I've never seen it.

SPEAKER_05 1:28

I dude, I've never seen it, and it was insane. We're gonna for the people watching on the YouTube, we'll put the video like right here now so you could see it. One of the craziest things I've ever seen. Like, because we live on a 12th floor of a building, so we have a pretty good view of like the city, and the uh the J train runs right below our apartment. Yeah, and we're about to start the pod, and I I see the train coming by, and there's three dudes full standing, arms spread out, Creed playing in the background. You take me!

SPEAKER_06 1:55

Yeah, they were standing like upright too, like very like good posture on the top of the great posture.

SPEAKER_05 2:01

I feel like you have to have good posture if you're gonna do that. It's like you said it shakes a bit. One of the craziest things I've ever seen.

SPEAKER_06 2:06

Well, it's crazy because when I'm in this inside of the vehicle, I like toss around. So I don't know how you do that and don't die. But I because it the train is super bumpy over here.

SPEAKER_05 2:16

But is it safer to subway surf? What if like another train came by and there's just three more dudes are like, oh, everyone's doing it.

SPEAKER_06 2:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 2:22

But is it safer to subway surf above, like outside, like above ground, or underneath? Because underneath you can't really you can't do it underneath.

SPEAKER_06 2:30

You would probably have to duck. Yeah, you could do it for like a second later. Pause. Um fuck. All right. Uh we're gonna start the podcast. We're gonna restart the pod. I'm sorry about that. Welcome to the losers podcast. No, um, I don't get it. It's it's so stupid because like if I died doing that and I went to heaven, I was like, so what got me? And God was like, Yeah, you did something you didn't need to do. Yeah, you're doing too much. Yeah, he's like, You you thought you were cool and you fell off the fucking subway. And and by the way, and God's sitting there, he's like, you can just ride it like a normal person at all times. Yeah. There's not a time in the day where you don't have to. There's nothing convenient about riding it that way. No, that is. If anything, it's a dis it's a the antithesis of a is that the right word?

SPEAKER_05 3:18

I think we'll keep going. I need to say I need to hear you use it for in a second.

SPEAKER_06 3:21

The convenience of riding the subway is you go inside and it takes you places. It's actually less convenient to be like, I want to ride the top of it because then you have to climb the subway and ride on top of it and be afraid of death. Yes. Doesn't solve anything.

SPEAKER_05 3:36

That is true, but I don't think they're doing it to seek more convenience. I think they're doing it because their lives are empty. Right. They don't have father figures. Well, it looked like three younger men, if I had to guess, younger gentlemen. And the the question here, folks, is is if the if we don't want them to do that to Subway Surf, what are we offering them as an alternative? Good point. Right?

SPEAKER_06 4:00

Good point.

SPEAKER_05 4:01

And this is where we just become Fox News.

SPEAKER_06 4:03

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 4:04

Oh, well, I mean, if we want people to subway stuff, it's tough because it's what are we gonna offer them as an alternative? There's no after school programs, there's no sports. Yeah, if we don't offer these things to children, they're going to ride on the top of the subway and get their head knocked off by support. Whatever happened to a Game Boy?

SPEAKER_06 4:18

You remember those things? Right. I'd be sit, I'd be sitting in the subway playing Game Boy, and now people want to be like Mario in Game Boy. They're playing Subway, it's it's Subway Surfer. Yeah, it it's which I mean, in theory, sounds kind of cool. Like, like if I sat here, I would be a complete liar if I was like, that sounds a little bit cool, but you it's just dangerous. It's it's it's it's incredibly dangerous. It's actually very dangerous. I mean, but it was cool as fuck, though. It was cool. The way they were standing, I was like, aura.

SPEAKER_05 4:51

Yes, I was about to say that is to me, and I'm I'm you know, I'm a little I've I'm kind of creeping into the phase of being, as the kids would call, unk.

SPEAKER_06 4:58

Right.

SPEAKER_05 4:59

I'm 28, I'm starting to slip on some of the lingo, but I would say that to me, that looked like they were aura farming.

SPEAKER_06 5:06

Yes, it did look like do you agree with that saying? Well, it's tough because it's like your mom can't afford eggs, we're going into a bunch of wars. Uh, our president is posting videos of um Rick and Morty themed style, and it's like, what what else do you want them to do at this point? I mean, that's literally yeah, that's what I was just saying. It's like what they have nothing.

SPEAKER_05 5:24

Yeah, what do you expect them to do? They don't care about school because every single one of their classmates is just using AI to pass the test. Exactly. There's nothing, they're like, Well, it's like I'm growing up so I can get drafted to go fight in Iran. For what? Too. Yeah, it's like I'm gonna ride on the top. Actually, now I'm on their side.

SPEAKER_06 5:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 5:40

I'm like, they did something that was truly spectacular. I caught it on video. I felt a thrill watching it. Yeah, like that's the most excited I've felt because nothing really matters anymore. It's already 3 p.m., and that is the most alive I've felt today. Uh, it's a good point. Just watching them.

SPEAKER_06 5:56

So imagine how alive they feel as well. That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_05 5:59

They inspired everyone else in this area that might have seen them from their window.

SPEAKER_06 6:02

Yeah, they inspired them. We can see the Empire State Building from our uh window. We can't, sorry. We can see every like all of Manhattan except for the Empire State Building. Yeah, I was really pissed off we couldn't see those people who climbed the Empire State Building. Because I think from our view, we probably wouldn't.

SPEAKER_05 6:18

Now, here's a question to you: those two people, everyone knows about it, the people that climb the Empire State Building proposed they held a sign. I was about to say, losers or winners. Now, why do you say losers?

SPEAKER_06 6:28

Because, from my understanding, it takes um the people that run the Empire State Building and like run the lighting and stuff like that for that tower, it's a lot of work, and to have two people climb it where it's um it's a liability issue for you. That's so annoying for that person that was working that day, and he's like, Okay, if they fall, I'm kind of fucked. Yeah, and also like there are there are people that do shit like that. I I think it's stupid, like that. What's that guy's name, Alex something who climbs. Alex Honnold. I think that's really dumb, but Alex Honnold only does it with permission from the buildings. That's true. Why would you not get permission to do something like that? And I'm supposed to sit here and be like, oh, two fucking rebels, so sick.

SPEAKER_05 7:12

No, see the funny thing about Alex Honnold, he asks the building for permission, yet he doesn't ask or consult his wife, which is fun. He just does it. She goes, What about our children? And he goes, Right.

SPEAKER_06 7:22

Who? Right. If you fall off this building, what are our children? They won't have a father. And he goes, It's for the love of the game, babe.

SPEAKER_05 7:30

He goes, We have kids? Yeah, what he goes, Oh, right, right, yeah, the little thing.

SPEAKER_06 7:34

He's chalking up his his his hands while they speak. What are you talking about?

SPEAKER_05 7:38

He dude, he is like a weird guy because he just doesn't give a shit about anyone. I saw other than like himself climbing. Yeah, and I saw a thing, you may this maybe we're gonna say, but I saw some some article. They were like, they did a study of Alex Homel's brain. Yeah, and guess what? The part of it that registers fear is small. Yeah. And I'm like, yeah, no duh. He's like not a human. Oh shit. Yeah, mind blown. It's like, yeah, he's he has no empathy, he doesn't feel anything unless he's 3,000 feet in the air hanging by his fucking fingernail on a rock. He doesn't feel anything. Everyone acted like it was his revelation. I liked here's the thing. I'm kind of chalking him up now as being a loser. I think he's a loser.

SPEAKER_06 8:18

I never liked that guy.

SPEAKER_05 8:19

No, no, no. When he did L Cap, the Yosemite climb, and they did the free solo doc, I loved it. I was like, this is sick because I had never heard of him. He wasn't this big influencer guy, at least on my radar. He just did it and then they put out the documentary, and then he kind of faded. And it was like, wow. But then he came back and he climbs like the Taipei 101 tower, and now he's doing all these stunts and like getting in the news. And I'm like, just it's trying to be an influencer. It's like, cut it out, dude.

SPEAKER_06 8:43

I also just think now that he has kids, you have something that you have to live for now. Totally. And it's like to still have that demon in you that's like, I want to do more. It's like, dude, you already did the coolest things that you could as a climber.

SPEAKER_05 8:54

Look, if you're if you're 17 and you want a subway surf to avoid going to fight in Iran, I'm all for it. True. But if you're like 32 and you have children and you're trying to climb a building, yeah, come on. That grow up.

SPEAKER_06 9:08

Hey, Alex, that means it grow up. There's there's gonna be a classroom in the future where one kid's like, my dad died in Iran, and she's all sad, and then the next girl's like, My dad died climbing a skyscraper that he didn't need to die doing because it was unnecessary.

SPEAKER_05 9:23

Yeah, my dad got hit by a seagull while climbing the the Chevy Tower or whatever.

SPEAKER_06 9:28

Dude, imagine a family member of the uh people that did the submarine in that class too. The people that took the submarine to the Titanic that blew up. Well, the the unfortunate stupid too. That was stupid. Stop doing things like that.

SPEAKER_05 9:41

One of the unfortunate things about that is that one of the guys, the billionaires that died in it, his son was with him too.

SPEAKER_06 9:46

Right. And I heard the mom didn't want the son to go. I think I read that as well. Yeah. Tip and just those things piss me the fuck off. I know. It's so annoying. You don't need to do things like that. Yeah, guys, this is a message from I don't even go. I wouldn't even go in a hot air balloon.

SPEAKER_05 10:02

That, yeah, that is a little bit.

SPEAKER_06 10:03

Those are dangerous too. I don't want to. I'm good the normal flying way with the wings. Yeah, you're like, do we have to you're like, yeah, yeah, it's like flying. We don't need a fucking balloon.

SPEAKER_05 10:11

You're like, do we have to make flight whimsical? Like, can we just get in the plane and fly? Yeah, I'm okay. I don't think it's like when you're on an airline and the flight attendant's like, how are we doing, folks? And like doing this whole speech, and then they start singing. You ever heard that? Where a flight attendant's like, we're like, Well, we're gonna sing you a song. Like, I was flying to Italy once, and the guy was like, No way. I was like, brother, the captain was singing a song. No, it was the flight attendant. I hope it wasn't the captain. It was the flight attendant, and I was like, dude, just shut up.

SPEAKER_06 10:40

She's just doing stand-up. She's like, hey, uh gay, gay, gay. It's like, it's like kill Tony stand-up on the fucking. She was like, You should have paid for two seats. Fat fuck. Yeah, fat fuck. She has a guy in the back who goes boom, chh.

SPEAKER_05 10:54

See, now Rose comedy, I would maybe support, but like the singing and like the cutesy, it's like, hey, just fly the plane.

SPEAKER_06 11:02

Yeah. Like a hot air balloon. It's like, what are we doing? What are we doing? It doesn't even sound enticing to me because you go up there and it's like, it's gotta be colder, too. And it's it's you're sitting in the open air, it's probably harder to breathe. I'd just be sitting up there like, I can't wait to go down.

SPEAKER_05 11:17

Yeah. Yeah, you get up and you're like, I can't wait to go down. Yeah, it's like a Seinfeld bed. It's like you get up in the air balloon and immediately I why do we go down? I don't want to be up here. Yeah. Yeah, I think whimsic whimsically. They are pretty though. Hot air balloons? Yeah. I've never been on one. Have you? No, just to see.

SPEAKER_06 11:36

Like there was in the air. Yeah. Yes. Very pretty.

SPEAKER_05 11:39

Very pretty. But um, yeah, that subway surfing thing was crazy.

SPEAKER_06 11:43

Dude, I can't get it out of my head. It's I know. I'm gonna be thinking about that.

SPEAKER_05 11:47

It like it, like you guys, you have to check it. Well, I'll probably post it, but like, yeah, if you're listening on Spotify, just check it out. And this isn't just a plug to get you to subscribe to our YouTube, but it kind of is. Literally go to our YouTube and re-watch this because I'm gonna put the video into it, and it was crazy.

SPEAKER_06 12:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 12:03

Like that's one of the craziest things I've seen since while living in New York. I'm not even kidding.

SPEAKER_06 12:06

I just don't even get how they were standing that way.

SPEAKER_05 12:08

I don't either.

SPEAKER_06 12:09

Because wouldn't the air they're going fast, so wouldn't the air.

SPEAKER_05 12:12

But the thing is, they were, if you notice, they were leaning. So they were leaning, like doing like the smooth criminal forward, and then the wind was kind of put like holding them up. So they were hitting that smooth criminal lean and the wind was holding them up.

SPEAKER_06 12:24

Interesting. Yes. That's pretty fucking sick, I'm not gonna lie. Yes. Wow. But then when it stops, you go. Wait, wait, do you do that again?

SPEAKER_05 12:38

Yeah, yeah, you fall off, you fall off and die. And here's the thing, I have heard, and this is kind of what you're saying about the people who climb the Empire State Building, it's like it inconveniences everyone that works there that does like climbs the tower and open in the light.

SPEAKER_06 12:51

You can put yourself at danger, and that's fine. But when you have a family, that makes it me less supportive of you because, like I said, there's people who count on you, and then when you're inconveniencing other jobs, that's those things annoy me.

SPEAKER_05 13:06

Dude, and here's one, and this is I'll say trigger warning to this. I talked to a guy who was an MTA worker, and he was I we were talking about subway surfing, and he was like, Yeah, he's like every now and then, um, and MTA is like a subway worker for those of you who don't know. Right. Um, he was like, Yeah, every now and then people will uh you know do this, kids do the subway surfing. And you know, I saw it once where a kid tried it and it didn't he fell off, and and I'm he's like, I'm not kidding you, we were we we were scraping him off the floor. I was like, oh he was like, Yeah, it was like yeah.

SPEAKER_06 13:38

I had a I heard a weird fact about this, not to get darker, but um, if you survive a subway crash, the subway stops on top of you, but you could be under there sort of mangled, not necessarily like splattered, but you're still alive. And the only way to get the subway off of you is they have this thing that uh pressurizes air and it like almost blasts the subway off. But a lot of times it'll end up killing you in the process. So they'll go down there as you're like mangled and be like, we don't know if you're gonna survive this. Would you like to call a family member if you don't? Not to bring up like literally one of the darkest stories I've heard this week, but um, it's I I can't get it out of my head, man.

SPEAKER_05 14:27

No, I mean I think I think it's appropriate. We we started the story or we started the pod with a you know an exciting story of subway surfing. And I feel like, you know, to be fair, we glorified it a little bit. Yeah, and I think it is right to wrap up this this segment talking about the real dangers of subway surfing.

SPEAKER_06 14:45

We're anti-subway surfing.

SPEAKER_05 14:46

We're anti because as I said before, splat one moment you're standing up there hitting the smooth criminal, having a great time, the next moment you're getting scraped off the floor. Because you've been turned into sidewalks, also.

SPEAKER_06 14:59

It's like uh you've seen how they uh have like ice cream that they can roll, sort of like like Goldstone? Yeah, you know how they like they like scrape the ice cream and they put the ingredients in it and they scrape it. Yeah, sort of like that, but like person.

SPEAKER_05 15:14

But like, yeah, like less fun.

SPEAKER_06 15:16

Yeah, it's more like a person on the floor.

SPEAKER_05 15:18

That's a great point, Bo.

SPEAKER_06 15:19

Yeah, it is. Okay, let's get into the losers of the week.

SPEAKER_05 15:21

Um, or actually, we know before we go to losers of the week, uh, let's do our L's of the week. What do we have? Or what do you want to start or should I?

SPEAKER_06 15:29

So you go. This just happened to me today. Uh, very short story. I was getting out of the elevator and I dropped my AirPod case. And for those who have AirPods, why do they fly when you drop the case? It's really, really just such an inconvenience that that happens. Yeah. When you drop an AirCod case, they literally just go bye, bing, and they just shoot out of the thing like a rocket. Yeah. They need to Apple needs to fix that.

SPEAKER_05 15:57

When I drop a case, it's almost like they're spring loaded. Yes, it is. Like you drop it and it's like bing, like they just shoot out.

SPEAKER_06 16:03

Yeah, you you you drop one and it hits a guy in the eye, and it's it's it's insane.

SPEAKER_05 16:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 16:08

So I dropped one, but it was right by someone else's apartment unit. And uh our apartments have like a little slit at the end of the door, so it flew into their unit. So and I knocked on it, they're not home because it's midday on a on a Monday, and then I had to write them a note and be like, My AirPod flew into your unit.

SPEAKER_05 16:27

And so you wrote the note where and you put it on the door?

SPEAKER_06 16:31

I put it on the door, yeah. Just sucks, bro.

SPEAKER_05 16:35

Now, did you just write my airpod flew into your unit?

SPEAKER_06 16:38

No, I wrote, I wrote I had to explain myself a little bit because then they might be like, I was about to say, that's yeah. If they don't have airpods and they don't know that they fly out of the case, that's gonna be really awkward. Yeah, that's an important look like I just took a an airpod and like rolled it like a dice and just shot it under their door. Yeah. Because it's probably like a good foot or two in the doorway, too.

SPEAKER_05 17:00

That's amazing. Yeah. That it really flips because the clearance between the floor and like the top of the door is like an inch, maybe.

SPEAKER_06 17:08

Yeah, it is. And it it it it was just the perfect storm. Yeah, that's a tough start to the wheel. It was such it just makes me really upset because I want to listen to music after this podcast, and I'm gonna have to one pod it, bro. You ever one pod it?

SPEAKER_05 17:23

With the AirPods, it sucks. Yeah, it's not a lot of things.

SPEAKER_06 17:28

And some of the songs have certain beats that only hit one of the pods to make you feel like you have like surround sound, and it's like Bro, Pink Floyd be doing that all yeah, they do.

SPEAKER_05 17:36

You'll be listening, and like in the right ear, sick music, left ear, it's like, you're gonna die. You're gonna die. Yeah.

unknown 17:44

I'm gonna fuck your mom.

SPEAKER_05 17:46

Well, I don't know.

SPEAKER_06 17:46

They say things like that, Pink Floyd, no?

SPEAKER_05 17:49

Not I'm gonna fuck your mom. But then they'll have stuff where it's like, you're dying. You're dead, and I'm gonna fuck fuck the shit out of your mom. That might be the the the unreleased track.

SPEAKER_06 18:00

It could be, but yeah, I don't know. I think that's that's uh that's one of my two L's this week. Um both of mine are appliance-based L's, which is weird. The other one is that I hired a guy to come mount our TV because we just got a new 65-inch. Yep. And um, and he came and said that we ordered the wrong stand, and he was like, I'll come back tomorrow. So I waited an entire day for him to come and then finally called him, and he said, Oh, I'm uh actually gonna come tomorrow. Didn't come that day either, and now we can't get a hold of him. It's really bothering me because we have this awesome 65-inch TV sitting here alone in the box and the stand is next to it, but both of us are um retarded when it comes to when it comes to And no one ever taught us. No one ever taught us.

SPEAKER_05 18:53

We're part of a generation that was just never taught how to do really any hard skills at all.

SPEAKER_06 18:58

No, we I I could not even know where to start.

SPEAKER_05 19:01

I can edit a pretty I can edit a pretty snappy social media clip. But I cannot construct anything in the real world.

SPEAKER_06 19:10

I had a girlfriend recently ask me if I could come help her mount her TV, and I said, Who the fuck do you think you're talking to? Who do you think I am that you think that I know how to do that? I don't do that myself. I got a I got a guy coming here and we're waiting on.

SPEAKER_05 19:25

Yeah, we're waiting on a man.

SPEAKER_06 19:26

Yeah, we're waiting on a big hunky, strong man.

SPEAKER_05 19:29

I don't know about that, but I just know we're waiting for him. So what's his deal?

SPEAKER_06 19:34

He's a good looking fella. What is his deal? I don't know. I think he's like a con.

SPEAKER_05 19:37

So but you said you contacted because he's like kind of in like employee.

SPEAKER_06 19:40

The Best Buy universe.

SPEAKER_05 19:42

He's like a subsidiary or like employee of Best Buy.

SPEAKER_06 19:45

Yeah, they hire him privately.

SPEAKER_05 19:46

But you said you called Best Buy and they were like, he said he did it. Yeah, he's he told them that he did it. And he clearly has not because the TV is in a box.

SPEAKER_06 19:54

I'm looking, I I said to the Best Buy lady on the phone, I go, Really? Because I'm looking at it in a box right now. And what did she say? And she said, Oh, well, you're gonna have to file a claim. And I was like, I fucking will. I'm but I don't want to file a claim, I want to keep reaching out. I've called him about eight times. Should we call him right now? Honestly, yeah. Let's see if he picks it up.

SPEAKER_05 20:12

Because I I want an answer from this guy, dude. I'm trying to play freaking Call of Duty on my 65-inch TV that we paid for. Put him, plug him in, plug him in. Plug that fucker in. Isn't it? There we go. Dude, this is insane. He's not gonna answer. He's dodging our calls.

SPEAKER_06 20:39

Not worth it. He's dodging our freaking calls, dude. He's a jerk. I'm so pissed about it. Like I don't know how to mount this freaking thing. I'm just a kid. I'm just a boy. Just a I'm gonna call my dad. Dude, he can't keep getting a big thing. Whenever I have problems, I just go, I'm gonna call my bad.

SPEAKER_05 20:56

We paid we paid this guy money.

SPEAKER_06 20:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 20:59

And he's not this is bro. This is an L of the week. We paid this guy money. We paid a $200 too.

SPEAKER_06 21:05

It wasn't. We paid, dude. We paid it was half of the price for the TV. We paid $400 for the TV and $200 for the TV.

SPEAKER_05 21:11

We paid a strong, skilled man to come into our home and assist us.

SPEAKER_06 21:15

Yeah. And he is not doing it. You could probably get a hand job in this city for $200. I'm just saying if you compare prices. No, it's just true. Like I'm paying a guy $200 to come mount my TV. I could just be getting whacked off in some massage parlor right now for the same price.

SPEAKER_05 21:33

Yeah, but how does that solve the TV?

SPEAKER_06 21:35

It doesn't. It's just what uh you can do a lot of you. I could go probably see a really good music artist for $200. That's true. Yeah. I could pay $400 hand job and music artist, no TV mount.

SPEAKER_05 21:49

I mean, you're you're really giving us a lesson in economics.

SPEAKER_06 21:53

I'm just telling you guys like if you when you compare these prices, it's pretty crazy. You're like, inflation is just insane. It's so nuts, dude. It's so nuts. Yeah. We could sell this TV right now, make $400 off of it, $50 off the stand, hand job music, and get new lighting for the podcast.

SPEAKER_05 22:14

Now that's enticing because this lighting is terrible. And we'd be chilling. Sorry guys for the bad lighting. We're working on it.

SPEAKER_06 22:20

I mean, we couldn't do one. We would both need hand jobs, though, so that'd be $400. Can you look up the prices of handjobs?

SPEAKER_05 22:27

You're really attached to this hand job, I guess.

SPEAKER_06 22:30

Yeah, I'm just asking.

SPEAKER_05 22:31

I'm just asking questions. Just asking questions. I don't know if you can look that up.

SPEAKER_06 22:38

Are you serious? Yeah, no, what are we doing?

SPEAKER_05 22:42

I can't see it. Sorry about technical stuff. One second.

SPEAKER_06 22:54

How much does it cost to receive?

SPEAKER_05 23:04

She doesn't have an answer for that. I could have told you that. No, you that that's why you need to do like grok or something. Siri is gonna not be gonna play ball with that. Oh my gosh. You go to grok, it'll give you a number immediately.

SPEAKER_06 23:16

Grok or if you're in the Bronx, it's $75 plus a shot at the bar. What bar? Yeah, wait, wait, wait. In Manhattan, you can get a handjob for twenty $125. Wow. But if you go to Chinatown or Soho, the price goes up to $175, and that's because they're probably better at that.

SPEAKER_05 23:36

Now imagine if we call, let's say they do house calls. Imagine you call one of these people, you go, hey, I'd love uh your services. Please come over. Oh, this lady's $60. But should we call her? What if what if we have them come over? We say, Do you do a house call? We'll pay extra. They get here, and we go, hey, look, I know that you do hand jobs, but to be honest, we really need our TV. Do you happen to have the skill set?

SPEAKER_06 24:00

Listen, we don't want a hand job. We just need you to mount this this TV, okay? Yeah. We'll be completely clothed during the whole process. Don't mind us.

SPEAKER_05 24:12

But can't the question is, can you do it? And the thing is, they probably would. They probably would have no other idea how to do it.

SPEAKER_06 24:19

Would you rather give someone a hand job or mount a TV?

SPEAKER_05 24:23

Well, I mean, if my life depended on it, I'd say hand job.

SPEAKER_06 24:26

Because I don't know how to mount a TV. Yeah, but you'd I'd learn so quickly, dude. Maybe that's maybe that's the key to life. Just be like, if my dad was like, you need to do this, otherwise you have to give some dude a handjob.

SPEAKER_05 24:38

Otherwise, you're gay. Yeah. I mean, there's so many things. That's like doing sports when you're a kid. It's like, yeah, either do this sport you don't like and get the shit beat out of you by people better than you at it, or you're gay.

SPEAKER_06 24:49

Yeah, but if my boss wanted me to do better at work, he'd just be like, either do better or you gotta give me a hand job, and then I'd be like, oh shit. Okay.

SPEAKER_05 24:55

I mean, that is that is kind of a philosophical quandary. It's like, would you would you rather do a hand job or mount someone's TV? Yeah. But I don't know how to mount a TV. I guess, but I guess you'd say you'd learn quick. That's true. But the thing is, obviously I understand so. Obviously, I understand like the the the process and the mechanics of mounting a TV, but it's like I said this to you, this thing's 60, this is a 65-incher.

SPEAKER_06 25:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 25:20

Bro, this is in this is inches. A lot of inches. And in order to mount that properly without it flying off the wall, you have to find the stud in the wall, and you need like a device. I think you need like a some kind of device that finds the stud in the wall. We don't even have that.

SPEAKER_06 25:35

My dad has one. He used to do it all the time.

SPEAKER_05 25:37

But uh and if you don't have that, otherwise you have to be like a wise indigenous man and you like knock on the wall.

SPEAKER_06 25:44

Yeah, but I don't think you can do that. I don't think that's like a thing. But maybe they could. If he knocks on the wall, he's like, No. Right there. Oof. Ooh, you're so right. Oh, that's an interesting quick thought. Dude, I would if someone was honestly, if someone was said something crazier, like, oh, can you install like a laundry machine in my unit? I probably would have to do the hand job. I don't think there's any amount of trading that could teach me how to do something like that.

SPEAKER_05 26:09

Yeah, it's like, would you rather do 65 inches or six?

SPEAKER_06 26:12

Yeah. Who's the guy that's like that's like making us do this?

SPEAKER_05 26:17

The guy who won't return. The guy who won't return our call.

SPEAKER_06 26:21

Yeah, should I call him back and be like, dude, I will, I'll blow you if you do this for me right now. Dude, I will. I would actually blow him up.

SPEAKER_05 26:27

I will whack you off if you mount this TV, dude. I need to watch the game.

SPEAKER_06 26:31

TV, I will fucking jerk you off until you come.

SPEAKER_05 26:35

I will, I will work you to completion if you mount my TV, you fucker. I've already paid you $200. This is this is the tip.

SPEAKER_06 26:44

Whacking someone off is kind of a fucking workout. Well, okay, wait, just saying. Hold on. Are you saying that from experience or you're just whacked myself off before? Absolutely. But I feel like it's harder if it's someone else. There's a little bit more wrist involved.

SPEAKER_05 27:00

Well, yeah, it's like it's kind of an awkward angle to this podcast. It's been targeted. But that is an L that you couldn't get that. I mean, the T it's literally, we're looking at it right now. It's sitting in a box, just staring at us. Like, like literally, it's like a and the TV inside, he's like, please mount me.

unknown 27:19

Please.

SPEAKER_05 27:20

That's the title of the episode.

SPEAKER_06 27:21

I just want to watch Netflix.

SPEAKER_05 27:23

That's the title of the episode, please mount me. It's a great title, actually. I mean, but it's literally, it's like a symbol of our of our of uh just how unskilled we are. Just literally sitting in our living room. It's a giant TV in a box staring at us. He's so pretty, too. It's like mocking us. It's like, well, you're not man enough to put me out.

SPEAKER_06 27:41

I want to get him out of that top. I want to freaking get him out of that box. Dude, I want to get him out of that box. I want to see him out in the open with his naked body, just Disney Plus on the TV. Dude, Disney. A little bit of Disney button. Disney Plus. Anyways. God. He's like, I've never done this before. Fucking reaching out, grabbing the TV, pulling him out. He's like, ooh, peacock too? Yeah. Screwing in the mounting him. Mounting him. Just drilling.

SPEAKER_05 28:09

That word is so hard. Fucking dude, we're just drilling 65 inches of fucking TV right in the middle. Yeah, just drilling him. He's like, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 28:16

You ever drilled 65 inches? That's the thing. We had to get to know him before we mounted him.

SPEAKER_05 28:21

That's a good point.

SPEAKER_06 28:22

What are we getting notifications from? LinkedIn. LinkedIn. You're on LinkedIn. Oh, my cousin has a it says I have a new notification for my cousin. Shout out Oliver. Sweet. If stuff is going well, I'll find out after the pod. Big win. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 28:36

Okay, should I go over my L of the week? Yeah. Dude, so I want to hear I went to TV mounting fucking TV. I know. That is that, but genuinely, that is very upsetting. We paid this guy. He did not mount the TV. He will not return our calls.

SPEAKER_06 28:50

He didn't even buy the TV dinner.

SPEAKER_05 28:51

Dude, I'm literally I'm gonna take a photo.

SPEAKER_06 28:54

Bingo! You gotta buy a TV dinner before you mount it. Alright, shut up.

SPEAKER_05 28:59

Alright, alright. I'm taking a photo of the TV in a box, and I will, if I remember, I'll edit it into the episode so people can see what the hell we're talking about. Perfect. But it's upsetting. We paid the guy and he ripped us off. And he will not. Maybe before the episode's out, we should try to call him one more time. Yeah, we will. I'm gonna relentlessly call it. You know what we could do, actually? We could leave a message and then you could do a voice change.

SPEAKER_06 29:20

It won't let. Oh, can I try the voice change?

SPEAKER_04 29:22

If you don't put up the fucking TV, I'm gonna tell you the whole son of a bitch.

SPEAKER_06 29:29

That's the coolest thing. I didn't know that it. Yeah. Yo. Why does mine not work?

SPEAKER_04 29:34

It only does it for my voice channel.

SPEAKER_06 29:36

Oh, can I try? No, you're not mad enough. Let me let me see. Okay, wait, hold on. Wait, don't question my manhood.

unknown 29:43

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 29:47

It would be fun to by the end of the episode.

SPEAKER_06 29:50

Why did we not know that that was a end of the episode?

SPEAKER_05 29:52

We should uh we should call him and I could leave a really good idea. Dude, if I called my mom with that voice, she would freak out. Bro, your house just called my mom and pretend like I got kidnapped. You can't, bro. Her house just got broken into. Can I say that? We said it on the pod before, I think.

SPEAKER_06 30:08

I don't know if we did, but I don't want to give her a heart attack. She would actually No, yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_05 30:12

She literally her she her house just got bubblerized.

SPEAKER_04 30:15

You call and you're like, we got a pole in a factory. If you don't give us $30,000 in 24 hours, we're gonna cut one of his fingers off every 10 minutes. You fucking bitch.

SPEAKER_05 30:26

Sorry for calling you a mama, bitch. I got a little I got a little ahead of myself. Okay, and bow and action.

SPEAKER_04 30:32

I have your son. He's in the back of my van right now. 31 Depaf Street. It's French Depa. It's not Deput of Voice. And we have him in the back of the van. Wire me $50,000 on Cash App right now. Otherwise, your whole entire family's gonna get it. I know where the others live. 133 Melbourne Street.

SPEAKER_06 30:51

Just go over all the Just go over all the street names that my that other people in my family live at. Okay, uh You know, wait, before you this actually reminds me when I was home for Thanksgiving, uh we changed my contact name in her phone to John Pork, and uh um we deleted all of the prior history between me and her, and I just kept like texting her and stuff, and I was like, I know I like have eyes on the house, I can see you in the kitchen like making stuff. And she would just look on her phone and we had like the John Pork like pork face, and she would be like, Who the fuck is John Pork? And she was freaking out. Oh we we pranked my mom a little too much. I feel bad for her sometimes.

SPEAKER_05 31:31

Yeah, there's no way we can call her and do a fake ransom.

SPEAKER_06 31:34

No, and I would actually feel bad about that because she would freak out.

SPEAKER_05 31:37

Yeah, she would that would not be cool. Well, that was fun. Um all right, let's get to your uh Alright. My L of the week, nothing major, but this was a little upsetting. Um, I went to Rockaway Beach, uh, which is a beach in Brooklyn. It was the first time I went, but I wanted to have a beach day, so I just went solo.

SPEAKER_06 31:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 31:54

And I take the train, I get to the beach, it's lovely weather, I'm having a great time. Um again, I'm by myself. I walk out onto the sand and I find a little plot that's open to like lay my towel down and stuff, and it's in front of this group of like they look like they were like there's like maybe 10, they're like 20-year-olds, like young, like college-age kids. Um and I walk, I like set up in front of them, and then once I get there, I realize that I haven't changed into my bathing suit. So I'm like, oh, I guess I gotta do this right here. So I you have underwear on? No. Well, no, I did. No, no, no, I did. I had I had like shorts on with underwear, but I had to change from that into a bathing suit to go swimming.

SPEAKER_06 32:37

Maybe you had to get butt naked to get in your bathing suit.

SPEAKER_05 32:39

But I had my towel. So I was like, oh, I'll just wrap my towel around me and just change. Oh, okay. You know, classic. I feel like Is your bathing suit webbed? Yeah. Okay. It's oh, it's webbed.

SPEAKER_06 32:50

I hate webbed bathing suits.

SPEAKER_05 32:51

I dude, I do too.

SPEAKER_06 32:52

They really piss. I always cut the webbing out when I buy one. I should do that. I'll cut it out and then I wear underwear on my bathing suit. Yeah, it is weird when it's webbed. I hate it because it gets traps all the sand.

SPEAKER_05 33:01

It's like you're just walking around with a pin. Exactly. You know what it reminds me? You know what it reminds me of? You know that scene in Finding Nemo at the end where all the fish are like trapped?

SPEAKER_06 33:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 33:09

It's like your nuts in there. Yeah, it is. You're just squeezed in this net with sand and seawater, and they're like, Let me out.

unknown 33:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 33:16

That's a tangent. But anyways, so I need to change, and the bathroom's like way the fuck down the beach. And I was like, I don't want to go walk all the way there. I found my spot. I'm just gonna wrap my towel, change there. I wrap my towel, I'm in the process of changing. A strong breeze comes by, takes the towel off of my body, and I'm not even kidding you. I'm able to cover like my dick and you know, the twig and berries so that no one could see that. Your hand? With my hand, because the towel like the towel like falls, and I'm like scrambling for the towel. Oh my god. My ass is out facing this entire group of like hip-looking, like 20-year-old Brooklyn kids. Yeah, it falls, it like falls off. I'm like, I'm like scrambling in the sand for it. Like some of the girls in the group are like and they start laughing, and then one guy just goes, tragic. And I like grab it, I turn around and I kind of look at them, and they're like, they're like, like, we're all like awkwardly like looking, and they're they're like laughing at me, and then I'm just like and I like change in my suit, and then I just have to like sit there. And the worst part about it was a hundred percent the guy that just went tragic. You were butt-naked in front of just a random girl, just ass out in front of a bunch of a bunch of kids.

SPEAKER_06 34:29

And see, if you had a link tree, we'd have to pay to see those berries.

SPEAKER_05 34:35

Yeah, but they got a free show.

SPEAKER_06 34:36

They got a free show, and and on the city.

SPEAKER_05 34:38

I covered the berries, but they they literally they saw my entire ass.

SPEAKER_06 34:41

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_05 34:42

And I I hadn't been sucks. I hadn't been like publicly embarrassed like that in kind of a while. That is, like I felt like it, like it was the kind of embarrassment that happens to you when you're like 10 years old.

SPEAKER_06 34:52

I used to have nightmares that I would uh that I would wake up um butt naked in front of people. So you just lived one of my nightmares. Yeah. But I'm fine with it now. I honestly I I would walk around naked right now and not have a problem with it. I mean I'm very comfortable with my good-looking body.

SPEAKER_05 35:09

It's it's not even like I because I I feel okay. Okay. I feel okay, but it was just like, I don't know, it was just like just the fact that it was at the beach and it was so many, like, it was just ten of these like trendy, like 20-year-old young people behind me.

SPEAKER_06 35:26

That sucks.

SPEAKER_05 35:26

That added to it. If it would have just been like not them and just other people, like that's so exactly. If it would have just been like families, I would have, I wouldn't, I would have been like, oh, whoops, I feel like if no one said anything, it wouldn't bother you as much.

SPEAKER_06 35:37

Yeah. But like the fat like if if you had just gone about your day and you'd be like, okay, that was awkward, and I know I bet they think that. But him going tragic, that makes things so much worse. Yes, that's what made it. He's calling out and being like, dude, we all saw that, and you look like a dumbass. Yeah, it's like we all saw your ass. Right. Trat, bro. It's it's true. And it it's it's not him saying like cute ass. He's like, no, it's that's a tragic butt.

SPEAKER_05 36:00

It definitely definitely wasn't that tragic butt, bro. That would have been a different story if they would have been like, ooh, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 36:05

See if that happened to a hot girl, they'd be like, Yes.

SPEAKER_05 36:08

If it was like a crowd of like young Latinas, being like, ooh, yes, yes, papi. That would have been different, obviously.

SPEAKER_06 36:17

That would have been a little different. Let that thing clap.

unknown 36:20

No.

SPEAKER_05 36:21

But it just it it had like a like a middle school level of embarrassment, like a middle school quality.

SPEAKER_06 36:28

Chuckle when he said that.

SPEAKER_05 36:29

Yeah, he was like, oh, tragic. And some of the girls were like, were they hot? They were kind of cute. Oh and I was just and then I had to just sit there because I didn't want to like leave, I didn't want to like run away, yeah. And like and run away from the embarrassment, right?

SPEAKER_06 36:43

Because that makes it look worse. Yeah, makes it look like I think. You don't care what these people you don't know think. It'll be it'll suck when you run into them on the subway, but they'll they probably surf. Yeah, they probably subway surf. It's probably those people we saw earlier.

SPEAKER_05 36:56

Yeah, fuck them. I hope they died. Yeah, but it was just it was it was an it was a level of embarrassment and a specific quality of embarrassment that I hadn't felt in a while.

SPEAKER_06 37:06

Also, it'd be one thing you were by yourself too. It'd be one thing if you were with a crew of people and they were like, ooh, that was so awkward, and you'd be like, Oh shit, that's awkward. Being by yourself too, you're like, I'm you were naked and afraid.

SPEAKER_05 37:19

Bingo! You really were though. No, I was I was naked and I was afraid, and there was a a a young man picking on me. And he said, tragic.

SPEAKER_06 37:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 37:32

In a way that was like intended to be humorous. He wasn't like, oh man, that sucks. Sorry. Sorry, dude.

SPEAKER_06 37:36

Trying. That's the thing, is you're just trying, I'm just trying my best. Like you tried your best to hide everything and like put your towel on in the wind, and God just Yeah, and God just decided to just blow my little towel off, and then this guy goes tragic. Yeah, dude, I don't even know. I don't even know how I would, I would probably kill myself if that was me. You're like, I would just walk into the ocean and never come back.

SPEAKER_05 38:02

I would hang on, I'm getting a zen, but he's zenning. But yeah, it was um it was just tough, man. It it just it like it really put me in like a high school, like slash middle school. Like I felt like a boy, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_06 38:17

Yeah, like a little boy.

SPEAKER_05 38:17

Like it, like I like I kind of felt like a little boy. I kind of got baby boyed. You know what I mean? It's like like I felt like you know the like the like the girl on the beach, like there's that like old, like, um, it's like an old advertisement for like suntan lotion where like the little baby like his butt is out on the beach. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I felt like that.

SPEAKER_06 38:33

That's such a vulnerable position to be in, honestly. It might be like you you ever seen those videos of those like baby penguins and they like can't walk? Yeah. And like the mom's like helping them walk. It's like that. You were just like a little, a little animal just out in the world. Dude, I yeah, I just I got like baby born.

SPEAKER_05 38:49

Did you stay by them the whole day? Um, I like I stayed in the spot I was at because the beach was really crowded. So I kind of was like, fuck, I don't want to like move and like be in an even worse spot. Yeah. So I kind of just had to sit there as they were just looking at the back of my head, going like, dude, that guy's that guy's weird.

SPEAKER_06 39:06

I just saw that dude's butt, bro. Yeah. You were truly butt naked.

SPEAKER_05 39:10

That's what I can't like that sucks so dude. And then the lifeguard came up and he was like, Hey, the police are here because um there's people have complained that you you were exposing yourself. Seriously?

unknown 39:23

No.

SPEAKER_05 39:25

I mean, it wouldn't have blown my mind. That would have been crazy though. If they complained, it sucks. Dude, imagine if the guy who said tragic like walks over with the lifeguard and he's like, Yeah, that's him. And I'm like, What's the what's happening? And they're like, they said you just expose yourself.

SPEAKER_06 39:38

You want to be the cops, and I'll be that guy. I'll be you want me to be the cops? Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 39:43

Yeah. This is the Rockaway Beach Police. How can I help you?

SPEAKER_06 39:49

Yo, brother. Uh, I'm on the beach right now. I'm chilling with uh a couple girls. Uh it's Rebecca, Jamie, and Lindsay. That sounds that sounds awesome. It's great. You sound like a cool guy. No, dude, it's amazing. It's just this fucking like loser. He was standing in front of us and he was trying to change, and then he exposed uself. I don't really care that he exposed himself. It's just he kind of killed the vibe a little bit. Was it front or back? It was back, and he caught he tried to cover his twig and berries with hands. But he didn't he didn't cover the back though? No, he should have covered the back. He should, I mean, knowing him, he probably could scoop one hand for just one hand for twig and berries, and then do back and then do the crack with his other hand.

SPEAKER_05 40:29

But yeah, no, I mean, in my experience, and uh, you know, it does sound like this this guy has some small dick energy.

SPEAKER_06 40:35

You're not really supposed to be naked on the beach because it's a public. No, I fully I fully agree. Is he there now? We'll come right out. He's sitting here because he's all embarrassed. Does he have any weapons on him? No weapons. We'll bring we'll bring guns. Yeah, it's a one weapon, it's a small one in between selects. But that's a funny joke. Yeah, dude, you seem awesome. Dude, if you if you're not doing anything later, come by the beach and grab a cold one. I mean, we're cooler.

SPEAKER_05 40:59

We'll come by and you know, probably beat this. We might kill him. Yeah, you should. But then afterwards. No, don't do that. It's it's not it's not that much of a burden, but it's I mean, we don't have any problem. I mean, he sounds like a like a pro I mean, he sounds like an issue in society. He's not an issue. You said he was showing his dick to the kids on the beach.

SPEAKER_06 41:17

Right. And you said he's alone? He's by himself. Yeah, that's a problem. That's a red flag. By himself. Massive red flag. I was like tragic when I saw it happen because it was an accident.

SPEAKER_05 41:28

His towel fell, and then you went tragic? Yeah, that's what I said. Dude, I wish I could high-five you through the phone. Dude, you're sick, bro.

SPEAKER_06 41:34

Have you uh have you ever thought about being a cop? Dude, honestly, my uncle is one, but he got kicked off the force. So I dude, probably for some bullshit. Yeah, it was something to do with like uh unarmed dude. But anywome, so uh yeah, I don't, I don't, I don't even know why I called, honestly. It's fine. He's gonna bring you. We'll come down. No, Don, I don't want you to do anything mean to him. It's it's it's it's truly okay. That's fair.

SPEAKER_05 42:00

Um well if if you guys feel like you kind of want to take it into you know upon yourselves to you know say something or even like restrain him, citizens arrest, like that would be totally chilly.

SPEAKER_06 42:08

No, I just kind of want him to die, but not through you guys, just like a natural cause almost.

SPEAKER_05 42:14

I mean, dude, the way you hit him with that tragic burn, sounds like he might just kill himself.

SPEAKER_06 42:19

Like I fucking murdered him. Well, he's not awesome. Like, oh my god, Kyle. And I was like, I know, it's crazy.

SPEAKER_05 42:26

But wait, your name's Kyle too?

SPEAKER_06 42:27

Yeah, my name's Kyle.

SPEAKER_05 42:28

Dude, me too. Wow, that's awesome, bro. No way, bro. Well, anyways, uh have an awesome time. Yeah, um, I hope you get sucked off by every single one of the women with the city. Dude, it sounds like you will because you're awesome.

SPEAKER_06 42:38

Yeah, and uh um, yeah, and if we run into that guy on the beach, we'll just go. Yeah, just just definitely arrest him and uh shove his face in something.

SPEAKER_05 42:48

Guys, that was an actual recording of the Rockaway Beach Police.

SPEAKER_06 42:52

That's exactly what happened, actually. I'm still doing the voice. Yeah, I don't even know what to say about that because it it's it's making me uncomfortable for you just thinking about it. Yeah, I don't know. I don't mean that in a rude way.

SPEAKER_05 43:03

I just know that you're feeling like you're leveling with me.

SPEAKER_06 43:05

Yeah, I can't imagine being butt naked on the beach.

SPEAKER_05 43:08

I'm still feeling this.

SPEAKER_06 43:10

Did you immediately like notice it and immediately pick up your sh uh bathing suit to put on?

SPEAKER_05 43:15

Yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah, I was like, I was like, I was covering with one hand and then the other hand I was like trying to get the towel in the sand. I look like a fool. I look like a little a little fool.

SPEAKER_06 43:24

This is like a scene from SpongeBob when he's at the beach. I think this happened to Spongebob. Wait, yes, this literally He ripped his pants. No, but it w he was on the beach naked by accident.

SPEAKER_05 43:34

Oh, I think you're right. I think his towel gets taken or something. Yes, and then he's like, he's doing that thing with a and he's like covering with both hands, like running around on the beach. What are you looking for? You're trying to find the scene?

SPEAKER_06 43:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 43:49

Guys, we're just scrolling reels.

SPEAKER_08 44:04

No, I am. I got sand in my buttons.

SPEAKER_01 44:14

No, I'm the biggest loser on the beach. They buried me in the sand and forgot me. What happened to you?

SPEAKER_06 44:23

I'm the biggest loser on the beach. I was butt naked in front of a group of girls, and the guy looked at me and said, tragic.

SPEAKER_05 44:31

What happened to you? I got frame mobbed by Kyle in front of his hot chick friends. Oh, okay, okay, okay. So it was um, like I said, I'm still processing it. It was kind of tough. Have you ever had any like that type of embarrassment? Specifically, like I'm wondering, like middle school, high school. Do you ever do you ever have any moments where you were just embarrassed? Because that's what it felt like to me. Like it took it, like it literally, like I felt like I was back in like middle school.

SPEAKER_06 44:56

Right, right.

SPEAKER_05 44:57

And not even like I was heavily bullied or anything.

SPEAKER_06 44:59

I used to see the bed in college a lot. Well, that's that's sad. Yeah, very sad. First of all, when you get really drunk, it happened to me one time, and I've heard from other people when you piss the bed from being too hammered, it just consistently happens after that. So I used to wake up and piss and be like, God, it's the worst feeling because not only are you hungover, but you have to deal with it immediately. Or like you can't just fall back asleep. You're cut, it's like gross, you're in water basically.

SPEAKER_05 45:25

Yeah, like it like forms that connection in your mind. Like once you do it once, it's like it's been it's like it's like now inextricably linked.

SPEAKER_06 45:33

Well, I used to do it while sleeping in a bed with my girlfriend, which was oh dude. What did she actually do? I did like three times. I think she did it one time, so I was like, oh shit. And it doesn't happen to me anymore, partly because I don't really know.

SPEAKER_05 45:45

You're like, I did it one time and then she did it one time, and then we just did it together for fun.

SPEAKER_06 45:49

And I I like I said, it doesn't happen anymore because I don't drink that that crazily anymore, right? But it used to happen to me at least once every two months, I would say.

SPEAKER_05 46:00

Damn. Well, thanks for sharing that. It kind of helps it kind of helps me feel a little bit less shameful.

SPEAKER_06 46:05

That's something that like in the same vein that you do, and it makes you feel like a toddler. Like I would wake up and be like, oh fuck. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're fucked if you pee the bed because it gets in your mattress and you have to figure out a way to clean the mattress. And it's hard to clean the mattress. You feel like a baby. Actually, you know what? Go, go, go, go, go. That was you on the beach. Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, guy.

SPEAKER_05 46:26

Look at the little baby.

SPEAKER_06 46:27

And I was like, you start whining, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 46:33

Seagulls start coming over. Were you hard?

unknown 46:37

What?

SPEAKER_05 46:37

That would suck. Well, yeah, that would be that would cause all kinds of problems. Then the cops would come.

SPEAKER_06 46:43

Yeah. I was not. They'd come for sure.

SPEAKER_05 46:46

Dude, because I'd fucking whack them off, bro. And we're back. Yeah, fuck those guys. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 46:53

You know what? Screw them, dude. Yeah, that is. They knew they knew your pain and they couldn't make fun of me anyways. They didn't even know me, and then they just and they just wanted to be cruel. Well, they also knew that it wasn't your intention to be butt-naked on the beach. That it was completely accidental. Yeah. If you're intentionally butt-naked on the beach, people can make fun of you.

SPEAKER_05 47:12

Imagine if I was hard, I turned around and I go, Oh, yeah, is this tragic? Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 47:15

I go, look at that. You know, I had a friend who said he used to shit in the ocean, which was weird. Like multiple people I went to college with. It was one of those things where that's crazy, right? That's it. I seem like the only person in the group that was like, I would never do that. He would be like, What do you mean? We all do it. Like, if you if you have to shit, you just open your pants, shit, it's the water, so your butt cleans immediately. Were you? And all the other ones were like, Yeah, we do you've never done that before. They're all from like Virginia.

SPEAKER_05 47:43

Members of like a steamboat? Like, what the fuck? Why are they why why do they think that's normal?

SPEAKER_06 47:48

I don't know. I apparently a lot of people do it, which is disgusting.

SPEAKER_05 47:51

So you're telling me they would go into the ocean and then like basically just perform.

SPEAKER_06 47:56

Pull their pants down a little bit, shit, and then continue.

SPEAKER_05 47:58

I was gonna say they literally just perform a water berth. Yeah, like they go in there and they're like bush! Yes, exactly.

SPEAKER_06 48:05

Which is also gross because that means that's floating around, so someone could easily swim into it.

SPEAKER_05 48:09

Also, like the You could too. Well, also, yes, of I mean, obviously, yes, there's now a shit floating in the ocean, but also it's like that's weird because then you like this is getting into the weeds a bit, but get no, get into the weeds. No, but if you take a shit in the underwater in the ocean, it's like some of that seawater is gonna get into your ass. Yeah. Unless you unless you rip it, but seawater's unless you rip it fast and unless you rip it fast and tight and there's and it's an airtight seal. Think about that. You're getting you're gonna get some splashback.

SPEAKER_06 48:41

Is that not that's probably good for you though? I don't know, dude. See, I feel like seawater is so good for you.

SPEAKER_05 48:47

I mean, if we're talking like if you're talking like pure seawater, you go up to like Greenland in the spring, you hit you hit a water. But dude, you're at Rockaway Beach in the summer, and it's like contaminated.

SPEAKER_06 49:00

You have like a vial of seawater from Iceland, it's like perfectly clear, and you're like, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 49:05

What and you just put it in your ass? It was yeah, so wait, uh that I don't even know what to say to that. They were just like, Well, you they're like, Oh, you can't.

SPEAKER_06 49:13

They were surprised that I didn't.

SPEAKER_05 49:14

They were they literally, they were like, Oh, you don't shit in the ocean?

SPEAKER_06 49:16

Correct. It was confusing to them that I don't do that.

SPEAKER_05 49:19

What the fuck? Yeah, disgusting.

SPEAKER_06 49:22

Horrible, horrible people.

SPEAKER_05 49:23

See, that's what the East Coasters. I mean, you guys are gross. There's nothing wrong with the East Coast.

SPEAKER_06 49:27

They're bad. They're bad. These are Virginians, though. We don't claim them. Sure. I feel the weird thing is is like I think North Carolina, South Carolina, Virginia, um, Georgia could be considered East Coast, but it's just not at all to me. I guess East Coast I categorize as like the tri-state area, uh like Philadelphia, then down to like I feel like once you hit Maryland, after that, it's not East Coast anymore. I guess it's like kind of the I mean it is it is geography geographically, but it's yes, but it's like the southern coast, kind of.

SPEAKER_05 49:57

I mean, clearly they're shitting in the water. They're doing it like they're shitting in the water. They're shitting in the water. They're shitting in the water. That's like something Trump would say about like Somalians that's not true. We're like, they come here and they shit in the in the water, these guys. And it's like, no, it's actually native Virginians doing that.

SPEAKER_06 50:15

No, they don't do that. What are you talking about? They they live in Minnesota, there's no water to shit on.

SPEAKER_05 50:20

What about they got lakes there?

SPEAKER_06 50:22

Yeah, you're right. Oh I wonder how they how Somalian immigrants like started why Minnesota was the place that they picked. Because there is such a bigger uh concentration of them in that than others. I don't know. Because it's like not the greatest. Like, if I was moving to America as an immigrant, I'd be like, let's settle down in Miami, okay? Yeah, but that's expensive. True. I mean, I'd go, I'd always go warm climate, that's my rule. Especially if you're from Somalia, which I'm sure is a really hot country. Dude, the winter's there. Yeah. What are those boys up to in the winter? It's so funny that that's where they're at.

SPEAKER_05 50:59

I'm just imagining, I mean, this isn't I'm just imagining like a Somalian Santa Claus for some reason. And we don't have to do this as a bit. I'm just it just popped into my head and I felt the need to say He's on the sleigh. I am the captain now. No, no, no, no. Don't you do that? Um, but that was my L for the week. Yeah. Should we get into some I got baby boyed hard?

SPEAKER_06 51:21

Yeah, you did get baby boyed hard. Um, okay.

SPEAKER_05 51:23

Do you want to get into you're a grown you're a grown man? Yeah, you know what? Now that we've like talked about it and you've kind of shared some of your embarrassment, I feel better. And now that I know there's people, yeah. Now that I know also there's people just like shamelessly shitting in the ocean, I'm like, oh, that's way worse than what I did.

SPEAKER_06 51:37

Oh, how about this? We don't have to unpack this too much, but the first time I visited my sister when she was in college, I was a sophomore in high school, so I didn't really drink that much. And I obviously drank way too much because it was like opened the floodgates. And I got so drunk that I threw up all over a pizza, I don't remember any of this, threw up all over a pizza restaurant, and my sister had to take me home, and her friend showered me as a sophomore in high school, gave me a shower, and then I woke up in piss in her friend's bed. Wow. I peed her friend's bed, they showered, butt naked showered me, and I had to and I threw up in a pizza restaurant. The guy was like, get him the fuck out of here.

SPEAKER_05 52:14

Dude, you're like a biohazard that they just like unleash on a community.

SPEAKER_06 52:18

Yeah, I could because once I have a couple drinks, I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 52:22

You're like, yeah, time to shit.

SPEAKER_06 52:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 52:26

Come to evacuate what's in me from every hole I have.

SPEAKER_06 52:29

I'm a great, I'm a I'm a fun time at a party, though. I'll tell you that. Hey, I don't doubt it. When I go to my sister's weddings, hey, I don't doubt it. It's a bad day to be a dance floor, brother. But the thing is the funnest people you put a dance floor in front of me when I've had a couple, oh boy. I don't doubt it. Get that thing away from me.

SPEAKER_05 52:44

The thing is, the funnest, the most fun person at a party, there is a tipping point.

SPEAKER_06 52:48

Yes, where they become the least fun person at a party.

SPEAKER_05 52:50

Yeah, and it is razor thin.

SPEAKER_06 52:52

It's so razor thin.

SPEAKER_05 52:53

I mean, it's one moment, it's you know, life of the party the next moment.

SPEAKER_06 52:57

Yes, you're destroying their kitchen or their bathroom. You I'm telling you right now, a couple drinks in, you put a dance floor in front of me. Oh man. Yeah. You you put the electric slide on, it's gonna be problems.

SPEAKER_05 53:09

And then a couple more dances put you in a bed.

SPEAKER_06 53:11

Yeah, you bet exactly.

SPEAKER_05 53:12

And it's a problem.

SPEAKER_06 53:13

Yeah, you're right. You're right. But for that, for that, for that tiny thin line where I'm in the zone and I'm cranking, you're locked in, and I'm requesting songs from the DJ like a beast. You better watch out because I'm gonna I I'm gonna I'm gonna out dance some grandmas on that floor.

SPEAKER_05 53:28

That's awesome.

SPEAKER_06 53:28

You you have a wedding and your your great aunt is there. Bad day to be her. It's doneza. Because she's she's got moves, but I'll tell you, brother, she don't she she don't jig it like me.

SPEAKER_05 53:37

Yeah, you like you like hip bump her out of the way and just break both of her hips.

SPEAKER_06 53:41

I get in there and I go, oooey. Back. It's like home to me. I go back home. And we're back. Yep, exactly. Damn. All right, let's get into some politics.

SPEAKER_05 53:50

All right, what do we want to cover first? I have some losers of the week. Um I mean, do you whichever one you want? We have this uh police officer who got busted using the flock cameras.

SPEAKER_06 54:02

Oh, yes, I love this one.

SPEAKER_05 54:03

Okay, let's I'm just gonna play this news story real quick about this. Just so that we can uh jump into this. But yeah, this was a police officer. Um so basically, just to set it up real quick, there's these things called flock cameras, which some people have probably heard of, but basically they are uh they are license plate reader cameras that are now like all across the country. Like they released something like an article recently that I think there's like 117,000 of these cameras now across the country on like every street. Right. And so they basically scan license plates and they can create a mapped, like they can create a map of whatever that person, wherever they've been during the day. It's like, oh, they went home, then they went to work, then they went to the liquor store, then they went to the library, then they went home again.

SPEAKER_06 54:49

It's obviously a complete breach of privacy.

SPEAKER_05 54:52

Yeah, I mean, there's like now like advocacy like advocacy groups and privacy groups are saying, like, yo, this is crazy.

SPEAKER_06 54:58

It's insane. It's it's it's exactly what a dystopian society would do.

SPEAKER_05 55:02

And now they're saying that like all of these, like like they're trying to say, like, oh, it doesn't track people, but it keeps they keep a record of these videos for 30 days. So for basically an entire month, everyone's movements are logged, and then the system, I think, like they say it wipes. No, it doesn't. They're storing this information. But they say it wipes and then resets it the next month. But for an entire month, anyone that has access to this database can type in your license plate and go, where have they been?

SPEAKER_06 55:29

Whoa.

SPEAKER_05 55:29

And that leads us into this.

SPEAKER_06 55:31

Wait, so I could if you had a car right now, I could look up where you've been if I had your license plate now.

SPEAKER_05 55:35

And you don't want to know where I've been. So this is a a fun news story about these flockers.

SPEAKER_06 55:41

It's probably just all regular places. Um, and then O'Connor's just grocery store, uh, hinge date, back home, grocery store, hinge date, happy ending parlor, trying to find someone to mount my frickin' TV for Christ. Uh okay. Um it would be such a good way to find out if your spouse is cheating, which I know is dude.

SPEAKER_05 56:00

Listen to this.

unknown 56:04

Come on.

SPEAKER_00 56:05

Another law enforcement officer facing charges after being accused of misusing the flock license plate reader. Authorities say a dispatch supervisor at the Conyers Real-Time Crime Center is accused of using the technology to track her partner's location. The Georgia Bureau of Investigation says Paige Ford accessed the flock system uh more than 30 times between April and this month for non-law enforcement purposes. The AG uh the GBI, the agency, says that it was asked to investigate Tuesday, and by Wednesday, Ford was arrested. Well, this is just the most recent arrest for alleged flock or license plate reader technology misuse. We have previously told you about arrests in Cherokee County as well as Fayetteville and across the state.

SPEAKER_06 56:49

Yeah, so so just for they can they can see how many times someone's visited the flock camera.

SPEAKER_05 56:55

Um yeah, so that's how this person got caught, is that they they saw that this um this so this person isn't a isn't a police officer, but they are the person who do the they this person supervises the dispatch. Yeah. So when like when you call, um the like when you call and the person reacts, they go, Hey, this is 911, like what's your emergency? This was someone who worked there and they were the supervisor.

SPEAKER_06 57:15

Wow.

SPEAKER_05 57:16

And so they use this system 30 times to see what their boyfriend was up to. Oof. Trying to catch him.

SPEAKER_06 57:23

I guess it's a positive that they are catching people like this. I guess.

SPEAKER_05 57:26

Well, it's a positive that they're catching like police off because like as this woman said, there's been several of these stories in the last few months of police officers using this technology to like see like what their wife is where their wife is going, to see like what their mom is doing, wow, to see where their brother is going. Wow. And it's clearly like and that's the thing, like these companies will be like, no, this isn't a surveillance state, this isn't a problem. It it's to stop crime. And you go, okay, but then you see like 30 different headlines about police officers using it to catch their wife. Would you break up with someone immediately if they were tracking you that way?

SPEAKER_06 58:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 58:02

What if you love them though? I mean, maybe there'd be a conversation, but I'd be like, yo, you don't trust me? What the hell? Yeah, that's I was saying it'd be so funny too. Like this woman who it would and it was a woman who was checking up to see where her boyfriend was. Like, imagine she's like, I think he's cheating. He just he did he will leave at random hours, and and I don't know where he's going, and he's very he he's very vague about it. He just says he went out. Imagine she goes and like looks and like checks the cameras, and it's just him going to a park every day just to sit on a bench and read. She's like he must be cheating on me, and it's like, no, he just wants some peace and fucking quiet. He's just sitting, he's skipping rocks on the pond. Yeah, he's like, he must be cheating. Who's he fucking? And he's just like feeding ducks at the lake. That's when you know you're a terrible person. Oh my gosh. Because when you see that footage and you go, Oh, he's not cheating on me, he just can't stand being around me. He just he just wants to sit at a park and and in some quiet. That's such a bad way to do it. Because you know the person that does that, she's probably not a good hang. No, not at all.

SPEAKER_06 59:02

Where have you been? You where'd you go? Did you ever have anyone that tracked your location when you were dating someone? Because I never had anyone who was crazy. I don't think so. I never shared my location with with people. But I'm like, I'm like the least I would so not cheat on someone because I would just break up with them. That's what never makes sense to me about cheating, is it's like, why don't you just fucking break up with that person? I wouldn't either don't because like a relationship, like I would always I'm I'm too guilty. I'm a bad liar too. You'd be like, are you cheating on me? And I'd be like, no. With a smile. No. Uh no, I'm not cheating on you, hon. No, you'd be like, no, what? What? No, no, no, no, I'm not, I would never do that. I'm not cheating on you. No.

SPEAKER_05 59:50

This is so unconvinced. You wink. So unconvinced. Yeah, you're you're winking at no one. Why who'd you just wink at?

SPEAKER_06 59:57

I'm not, I don't know. I would never cheat on you. It is. It's such a weird thing to do. But I guess I don't know. I feel like women check phones more than men do. And I also I've never dated someone, and I did get cheated on. Um, I never dated someone though, who I was like jealous. I've never been jealous of a girl, even if she has like a close relationship with a guy, it doesn't really bother me. Because I'm just like, if you want to cheat on me, that's fucked up, but like that's your own prerogative, whatever, we're not gonna date anymore.

SPEAKER_05 1:00:27

Like Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:29

What? We're checking spy cams now?

SPEAKER_05 1:00:32

Yeah, we're you we're using the surveillance.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:35

I can picture her with like a VR headset on, like with like a drone out, and she's like, I'm gonna get him.

SPEAKER_05 1:00:41

I'm gonna fucking find this guy. Yeah, that's and that and that just shows you how dumb we are. Is that like everyone's like, oh, the surveillance state, like like Peter Thiel's building this, these all these cameras linked to the surveillance state, and you can get information on civilians, social credit score. They're gonna they're gonna fli herd us like cattle into a uh cyber prison. And it's like, no, it's just like dumb cops trying to figure out if their wife's cheating on them. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:05

Oh, it was a guy that did that. Well, no, this was a woman, but I'm saying there's been so much the whole point is that it's like that's that's how dumb we are. We're using this, like, no one's using AI to like hack into the hack into a country. You're using AI to know, you know, if if toothpaste what the ingredients are.

unknown 1:01:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:23

Yeah, you're using it to know like what's safe to microwave.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:26

Yeah, I'm I'm using AI to give my dad an eight pack and put him in a funny bathing suit at the beach.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:32

And send it to the family group chat and go, yo, Pop's looking good. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That is just a couple ha ha's on the message, dude. And that's the problem, is like there's all the and that's like the big story now, is it's just like AI data centers and all that. And obviously, let's be honest, it will end up being that way. Well, yes, there is a segment of like the ruling class that is building these data centers so that they can create this like cyber prison.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:55

In fact, for a podcast that doesn't have that many listeners yet, but it will, even us posting this video on YouTube, some AI will probably listen to us saying this and we'll be like, get them.

SPEAKER_05 1:02:06

Yeah, no, this will be logged into a thing where it's like, oh, these these two are not very favorable to the AI system and the data center thing.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:02:14

But it's like that the point being, yes, there are a few people in power that want to create this thing, but for the vast amount of people, it's like we're using AI for the dumbest shit. Right.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:24

Just the most careless shit that nobody cares about. What it what are the ingredients in McDonald's super sauce that they put on the Big Mac? I did that two days ago and it gave me a full detailed account. Yeah. And that's helpful to me. Like, I I love that sauce.

SPEAKER_05 1:02:39

Yeah, it's like, hey Grok, can you create an image of tung tung sahor with tits?

SPEAKER_06 1:02:45

And he did that the other day, and it was awesome. And they looked great. And they were good tongue tongue tongue tits. Tung tongue-tung tongue titties. Yeah. I mean, it's just but that's just how this country is. What would you use that software for? Like, if there's anything where you're like, yes, I know this is evil, but this would actually help my day-to-day.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:07

Like an AI, or like what the flock cameras?

SPEAKER_06 1:03:10

I'd use it to figure out where this freaking TV guy is. I would use it to see. I wanna wit, I want to witness what the day-to-day life of the subway surfers is. Like what brought them, like what they're doing right now post-subway surfers. That's a no, no, now that's interesting. That would intrigue me.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:29

If you could like if you could like use the AI to like like look back in their day, like this morning, for example, if you could track their movements this morning and then find the security cameras that saw them earlier in the day, yeah. What was happening?

SPEAKER_06 1:03:42

What was going on? How'd you guys I don't know how they're gonna be?

SPEAKER_05 1:03:44

I'll tell you this, they weren't at chess club. Nope. They weren't they weren't doing recreational.

SPEAKER_06 1:03:49

They weren't doing SAT tutoring, that's for sure.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:51

They weren't doing recreational sports. You're not gonna see it's not gonna be a camera where it's like, oh, he was in the little he's in the big brother program.

SPEAKER_06 1:03:58

Yeah, no.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:59

He was he was with his big brother earlier watching the Mets game.

SPEAKER_06 1:04:02

Yep.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:03

They weren't doing that.

SPEAKER_06 1:04:04

Nope. No, they were surfing the subs. Surfing the subs. That is an interesting way to use AI. Yeah, it is. It is a pretty cool way to use it. It's just like, what were the bad things? We are so fucked, dude. We are so fucked. This is maybe the worst timeline to be in, um, other than like the ones where like slavery was a thing. That'd be a pretty bad one, too.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:23

No, but this one what do you mean? That's what's funny, though. What do you mean if we were in that timeline? We're in that timeline.

SPEAKER_06 1:04:30

Yeah, you're right. There's slavery did happen, and it's still happening. You know, there's more slaves today than any other.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:35

No, but what if it was a timeline where we were slaves? Yeah, and then I go, I go, now you're scared.

SPEAKER_06 1:04:40

That would be really tough. I go, now you're having me shaken by bitch. It is funny because um my grandparents and my also my parents will always be like, God, this generation's so fucked. Like the world is so fucked right now. And if you look at human history, we are fucked right now, absolutely, but there's a lot of time periods where we were a little bit more fucked.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:00

Oh, for sure.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:01

Like uh imagine it imagine living in in the era of the bubonic plague.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:07

Crazy.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:08

Crazy to me. I'm choosing flock cameras over bubonic all day long.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:12

See now the only di and I agree with you, there are times obviously in the past that were worse. The only difference is like, you know, 3,000 years ago, the Aztecs were, and I'm probably wrong on this history, so fucking shut up. But like 3,000 years ago, the Aztecs were sacrificing humans to please the gods so to get some outcome. Right.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:29

I think that's a good idea. I want to see the minds, sure.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:32

We now know that that's probably fake. It wasn't doing much. But nowadays, speak for yourself. Who knows? But nowadays we're sacrificing human lives to build an AI god that is very real and is going to kill us all.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:45

Yes, you're very right.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:46

Nowadays it's like, oh, we're just gonna like take your house and build a data center on it, and then everyone else around it is gonna get brain cancer so that you can make tongue tongue suhor with tits.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:55

Right, right, right.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:56

And oh, and it's also going to become the next president. That's the difference with the era we're in, is that we're you think we're worshipping gods era is the worst then. Maybe, because we're creating and worshipping gods that are real.

SPEAKER_06 1:06:10

I think for the majority of humanity it's the best because I think like, for example, right? People in the world, if you were like, slavery is cool, most people I would hope would, or at least especially in Western countries, would be like, that's genuinely not true, and that's offensive. Right. Um you go back, you know, 200 years and you go, slavery is cool, and guys go, Facts, brother. And so maybe for the general public, the world is good, but for like the mega mines and the ultra wealthy, the world, they're like, Oh, buckle up, buddy. Oh, buckle up. I know we're not in the era of slavery is cool anymore, but guess what? To us, amongst our circles, slavery is fucking cool. I mean, amongst like the billionaire circles. Yes. So I guess you're I guess you're kind of right.

SPEAKER_05 1:07:04

But yeah, so that I think that cop uh loser, and I yeah, that that's loser of the week.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:11

There's also never been a science fiction movie that's been like, actually, when AI happens, it's gonna be great. Yeah, I don't think so. Who has made that movie that's like no no no no no no guys, hear me out? Computers having minds like humans is totally gonna be awesome. They're all like, oh, it's awesome for like maybe five years, and then you go, and then ten years down the road, we're all in a bunker. And there's like I saw this old movie where like a guy is looking at an orange and they're not used to seeing produce anymore, and he's like, an orange, yeah, and he's like freaking out about it, and they make like the orange really, really, really orange in the film. It's like it's like really orange. It's symbol symbolic of like you know, we've lost our innocence.

SPEAKER_05 1:07:59

Yeah, why don't they get and no one's making like a positive AI film because no one believes that that is gonna be the outcome.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:05

I bet Peter Thiel will very soon. Yeah, or Mel Gibson. Peter, if yeah, Peter and Mel Gibson, if you guys make this film, you could persuade public opinion to the city.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:15

Dude, yeah, Peter Teal just gives Mel Gibson a bunch of money to just make like Passion of the Christ, but for AI.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:20

Yeah, exactly. And they're like, we actually really like these cameras because um they they help us with our daily life and tracking people that are cheating on you, and people shouldn't cheat on you.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:29

So yes. Well, the whole sell for the flock cameras is like, oh, it prevents like car theft and it prevents like you know crimes because which, like, sure, if you put cameras on every street corner, yes, it will prevent crime. Right. But it's also like it's also going to prevent living in a free society where you don't have to worry about some dude watching your movements because he wants to steal your girlfriend or something.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:53

It's an interesting question because it's a breach of privacy and it's not a good like I feel like when airport security got really tightened up after 9-11, it was like that's a good breach of privacy. Like you should who the fuck needs to bring a knife on the plane or smoke a cigarette on the plane? Yeah, but so that might be their argument, but it's it's not it's not a positive breach because they're gonna use that data in negative ways.

SPEAKER_05 1:09:21

Yeah.

unknown 1:09:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:23

Well, we're screwed. Yeah, we're fucked.

SPEAKER_05 1:09:25

Next loser. Next loser of the week. Did you have any or should I keep keep on?

SPEAKER_06 1:09:29

No, I didn't really have any other than uh I mean, not really anyone. I mean, Nick Fuentes is a loser, but he met with uh Biden. Oh, right.

SPEAKER_05 1:09:40

Oh, that's a great one. Um, I mean, some of you guys may have seen it, but Andrew Callahan, who does Channel 5 News, which just I'll say this at the top. I really like him.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:48

Really? I haven't really I don't know that much about him. Should I check him out?

SPEAKER_05 1:09:52

You should check him out because like uh genuinely he I feel like he's really it seems to me, and maybe something will come out in a year and he'll be a war criminal or whatever, but it's like it genuinely seems to me like he cares about journalism. That's amazing, and he's made a lot of really cool documentaries and like he started as like a man on the street in like uh the what's that part of New Orleans called where all the drinking happens?

SPEAKER_06 1:10:14

Uh Bourbon, Bourbon Street.

SPEAKER_05 1:10:16

He was like a man on the street. This was like 2016 or something, man on the street interviews in Bourbon Street, where he would just like talk to crazy people and it was like just funny content. And then as time went on, he started doing more actual like well, let's like learn about these people, let's learn about this community. Like he actually was doing like journalism, yeah, and he's made a bunch of really cool um documentaries and stuff, and now he's doing like I mean, he like he recently went to like um Iran to go do interview people there. He went to Gaza.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:43

Um, he's like such a cool career trajectory, dude.

SPEAKER_05 1:10:46

And he's like, he's like my he's like 28. He's like crushing it. Wow. So I have a lot of respect for him, but he did this moderated debate, and some people see that he had these people on, and they're like, ah, fuck him, I don't want to talk to him. But he had Hunter Biden and Nick Fuentes on to like have kind of he was moderating kind of like a debate slash conversation for them to just like and have you watched it?

SPEAKER_06 1:11:06

I've watched clips of it, and uh it's pretty funny, I would say. Because like on the one hand, you have a psychotic Nazi who has appealed to an incel crowd in America of young white men, and on the other hand, you have someone who's a former crack cocaine addict who also happens to be the son of the former president, so it's like an interesting sort of blend. Yeah, but I actually I can I say this like I've always hated on Hunter Biden for the crack thing, yeah. But recently I was like, Well, why I can't hate on someone for having a drug addiction. Like, I feel bad for him for that one. And he carries himself really good in this interview. He does. Um, I mean, he does I said this earlier, but he does kind of talk like his dad. I've he does, and I I found myself kind of intrigued by things he had to say. So shout out, kind of shout out Hunter Biden, honestly. It is funny though, because he kind of talks like his dad, which kind of like I come on Nick, Nick.

SPEAKER_05 1:12:01

And it makes me wonder is that way of talking a genetic thing, or did Joe Biden also do crack?

SPEAKER_06 1:12:08

You know, I think it's a genetic thing.

SPEAKER_05 1:12:10

It probably is, but I just I just thought it was fun. But he he does like talk like him.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:14

He because Yeah, Joe Biden was doing crack with corn pop for sure.

SPEAKER_05 1:12:17

Yeah, we in corn pop, you should you should put a little on a tin four, burn that, and have a nice little time.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:23

That is awesome. But it is such a funny interview because you have Hunter on one hand and he's like, he's like, Nick, when you say the Jews should burn like cookies, I mean it it upsets my wife. She's Jewish.

SPEAKER_05 1:12:35

And Nick's like, yeah, I don't give a fuck. You have a good hunter by the Nick's like, look. He's like, I'm joking.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:43

Nick, it's just rude. She doesn't like it, okay? It's rude. You're making light of something that's not funny.

SPEAKER_05 1:12:50

And then ask me, uh ask me to apologize. Can you can you just say sorry? I mean, it's just not you're a smart guy. No, thank you. That's basically if you guys haven't watched it, that is the entire like obviously they go into like detail on certain topics, but like that is kind of like the cliff notes of their debate. Yeah. Is it's Hunter Biden being like, Can you please apologize for saying the Holocaust didn't happen? And then Nick Fuentes is going, no, thank you. Yes, it's so weird. Like politely, too. He's like, No. He's like, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna do that. He's like, I'm just not gonna do that. And it's like, damn. You hurt people, okay?

SPEAKER_06 1:13:28

You're a smart kid. You're you're hurting people, you're hurting people. Yeah, you can't say Jews who are like Jews who like cookies. Why'd you say that? My wife, my wife is hurt by that. She's a grown woman, she's not a cookie, and he goes, Grow up.

SPEAKER_05 1:13:39

Like that was his whole vibe. He's like, I'm being funny, I'm joking, and it's like, eh.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:43

I know that's the thing. Oh, yeah, that's what sucks about it, is he's now stood on the fact that he's joking when he makes these comments, but none of the people that support Nick Fuentes think that, and I know he doesn't really think that, which says he is really a master manipulator in that way. Yes, it's scary, and it it sucks because I want to stand on the side of like we should never interview him. But I think you do need to interview these crazy people because he does have a following, and that's scary for the history of America. Yeah. Or the future of America, I mean.

SPEAKER_05 1:14:14

Well, yeah, it's yeah, if he has such if he is.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:16

We can't just shut him out because he has he's a big influent flint now.

SPEAKER_05 1:14:20

I mean, yeah, he's got a lot of young men that listen to him, so it's like, yeah, why do they?

SPEAKER_06 1:14:26

And um the answer is uh they might be Nazis. I think that's the right, I think that's the play right there. We have a lot of young white nationalists in this country now.

SPEAKER_05 1:14:38

Nick, he can't be saying that. Come on, what are you saying that for, Nick?

SPEAKER_06 1:14:43

Come on, I know you and he keeps saying his name too, though.

SPEAKER_05 1:14:46

And he's like, Nick, come on, Nick, come on.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:48

I know. God, that would be such a hard interview to conduct because you have to keep your cool while talking to Fuentes because he thrives on people blowing up. Yes, because he'll get a clip out of it and he'll come for you and be like, like, have you seen him with Piers Morgan? Yeah, yeah, where where Piers is like, you've said all these things, and he's like, Yeah, it's fucking funny, Piers. And then it just and like the clip is like Nick Fuentes owns Piers. Owns him. He fucking owns him. Yeah. So I don't know. I props to Hunter for trying to have a conversation with that guy, but it's very clear he's just he's a bad person.

SPEAKER_05 1:15:29

Yeah, I think so. But it was an interesting watch. Um, Nick Quentez, loser of the week. For sure.

SPEAKER_06 1:15:34

Loser every week.

SPEAKER_05 1:15:35

Fuck loser of just all of the weeks. Um, and then I guess we do you want to go into Lindsey Graham or do you want to wrap this?

SPEAKER_06 1:15:42

Uh we could we could touch Lindsay a little bit.

SPEAKER_05 1:15:44

We could touch Lindsay.

SPEAKER_06 1:15:45

Let's touch Lindsay.

SPEAKER_05 1:15:46

I think Lindsay would like to touch you. Ooh. Okay, so Lindsey Graham, obviously, uh well, some people may not know this, but he passed away. Um, and you know, we said this before. We don't necessarily like or support just making fun of dead people because they're dead. That's not what we do here.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:02

We don't actually care if other people do it. It's just not the flavor that we're doing. Yeah, it's just not we're I'm not big on it. Trying to go for fun and silly flavor, you know. Yes, a couple riffs here and there. Not like, oh fuck this guy, he's dead.

SPEAKER_05 1:16:14

Yes, so that's not necessarily what we're doing, but this is a story. So Lindsey Graham, he passed away, he was a senator of South Carolina, and there has now, like this was like today, footage has been leaked by a documentarian that was following him around. Right. And basically in the footage, uh, I'll play it in a second, is uh like the him, like it's filming him as the Iran war announcement happens, as they're like, hey, Trump just like started a war with Iran. It's Lindsey Graham's reaction to it. Um and it's not uh Did this just get released? Yes. Okay, this was like today. Um so take a listen.

SPEAKER_02 1:16:51

Virtually everything they have has been knocked out now. Yeah, their missile count is going way down. No, amazingly country's just been look what we've done here.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:02

I almost cried. Yeah. I mean, like, how long have we been pushing this?

SPEAKER_08 1:17:07

I mean, you've been pushing this for years, right? Right. It's here. I talked to Trump this morning.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:12

Well, he's Jack. He's the best thing I've ever done. He loves blowing stuff up. So, you know, there are a lot of people inside didn't want to do it. So I've had my challenges. But President Trump when he gets into the zone, he listens, he asks good questions, you know, no tweeting. He has done nothing, he hadn't tweeted much at all, no drama. He's been a great wartime president. I said last last night that Trump and BB are like Roosevelt and Churchill. I mean, they're the right two guys to confront this evil.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:54

Roosevelt and Churchill.

SPEAKER_05 1:17:56

Right, Roosevelt and Churchill. I think I'd maybe pick two different figures from World War II if I had to make a comparison. And I'm not gonna say who they are, but I think you know what I'm getting at. It's like, what? Here's the thing. Do you think anyone that's actually been to war has that reaction to it? Anyone who's actually a psycho reaction. Where'd you go to go? I've been pushing this a long time. I've been pushing this. We've been pushing this a long time.

SPEAKER_06 1:18:24

I've been trying to get in Iran for time after time. And President Trump can't do it.

SPEAKER_05 1:18:29

President Trump, he's doing it. He's really doing it.

SPEAKER_06 1:18:33

It's such a weird reaction because even if you are pro that war, you would still be like, oh shit, we're doing it. Uh I'm I I think I think it's due time, but I I don't know. I it's it's gonna be tough. Yeah, I think that's like the proper reaction if you're pro going into Iran.

SPEAKER_05 1:18:48

The response you want from politicians, our politicians about war is like a measured, serious, like, well, you know, we're going to war, and you know, we don't necessarily love that we have to do that, but we think we need to do that to protect the necessary. Yes. He's like, oh boy, goody, sweet baby Jesus, we're going to war.

SPEAKER_06 1:19:07

It's like, what is this? Like, I'm eating chicken pot pie tonight. He goes, Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, Lindsey Graham, man. You shouldn't have done that, brother.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:17

Yeah, you're a you're a fucking loser, man. Yeah, that's a weird response. That is loser shit. We've already seen that like this.

SPEAKER_06 1:19:24

Yeah, no one was going into World War II, even though completely just war. Um, the Nazis were not doing good things, and that's such an understatement for what was going on. Yes. No one was going into World War II, though, on the Allied forces, like, Goody, I can't wait to get to uh I can't wait for D-Day. Yes. I'm so excited to storm those beaches in Normandy.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:45

Yeah, there's no footage of FDR being like, when this is done, we're gonna build a great casino in Normandy.

SPEAKER_06 1:19:50

Yeah, or FDR posting like AI generated clips on the White House Twitter page about World War II.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:55

Yeah, there's none of that. And it's just it's just so it's like that's how far that we've gone now is that you have this senator just giddily laughing, giggling about the fact that we're going into a war in Iran, which would shortly after this lead to a school of about 130 girls, schoolgirls, getting bombed and killed. Yeah. Like literally, shortly after this, we start launching missiles, one of them malfunctions, hits a school of 130 children. There were Lindsay Graham's going, oh, sweetie! Sweetie. Happy, happy day! Corn on the cob. It's like, what is this, dude? Eating them. Damn. Ooh. Burn Iran. All I'm saying is, I hope he's thinking about his actions up in heaven.

SPEAKER_06 1:20:44

But it's so weird. It is so weird because, yeah, like I said, no one, no one during World War II, like there was plenty of civilian casualties uh committed by the Allied forces against Germany. Of course, and those still suck. A lot of those people, just because you were German at the time, doesn't mean you were necessarily pro-Nazi party. Dude, of course, they had to be.

SPEAKER_05 1:21:06

The firebombing of Dresden, yes, Allied forces like just fucking bomb the shit out of a city in Germany called Dresden. And they use firebombs and like melted the city. Like there's literally accounts of people that were there seeing people on the street melting into the street.

SPEAKER_06 1:21:22

Yes. And granted, obviously, World War II completely justified. And I'm sure every news reporter was like, we just bombed Dresden. It was a really hard thing that we had to do, but we just felt like it was necessary.

SPEAKER_05 1:21:34

And do you want to know the only person in World War II that was laughing about that? Anyone want to take a guess? His name starts with an H and ends with Hitler. Yeah. And that's our show, folks.

SPEAKER_06 1:21:46

He was uh he's talking about Adolf Hitler. That's correct. That's the that's the correct answer right there.

SPEAKER_05 1:21:52

No, I'm talking about Hish uh fucking never.

SPEAKER_06 1:21:54

Ah, dude, if there was if there was another if there was a World War III, it would be so memed.

SPEAKER_05 1:21:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:22:00

Oh that's the next front, that's the next frontier of war, is just memory. I know, and it's all just gonna be drones and shit like that. Well, folks. You've heard it here first. Thanks for tuning in. Did we get anywhere on this podcast? No, but we never do, and that's the point of the pod. That is kind of the point.

SPEAKER_05 1:22:17

But hey man, no, we kind of did though, at least personally. I I kind of overcame my shame from the beach. Yes. Um, this guy, we did not fix the TV station. I'm gonna blow a guy to mount our TV. He's gonna give a he's gonna whack a guy off to have him mount 65 inches. Yes, just cure him on our TV.

SPEAKER_06 1:22:32

Before we adjourn, do you think you connect every could connect every topic that we talked about today? I think I think I think we could try. Okay, let's do it.

SPEAKER_05 1:22:42

Um Okay, you start so this is a this is a tough one. How what do you mean connect? How are we gonna do that?

SPEAKER_06 1:22:54

So um I go to the beach. You go to the beach and you're naked, so you're in that moment you're sort of like Hunter Biden interviewing Fuentes because you're just you're letting it all hang out and cry, and you're really trying your best to reach a conclusion. But Fuentes is like.

SPEAKER_05 1:23:11

No, but no, yeah, but no, yeah. My ass is out, and I'm and I'm like, and I'm looking at the guy by like the group behind me, and I'm like, hey, look, we're all human. Can you guys maybe apologize for giggling? And the guy goes, tragic. That's Nick Fuentes. Yes, yeah. I go, can you please apologize for the Holocaust? He goes, tragic. Now we're cooking with gas. So then that happens. So then I come home and I'm like, well, the world hates me. How about I watch um something that'll cheer me up on my TV? Yes.

SPEAKER_06 1:23:37

Oh, wait, it's not mounted. And then you look outside and you go, Oh, there's people riding the subway. Oh, great. They might have to fight in a war in Iran that Lindsey Graham is excited about.

SPEAKER_05 1:23:47

Yeah, and it's like they're not at home watching TV because no one works anymore, so their TV's not mounted. So they're on the subway, riding the subway into a future that they don't know what's gonna happen. They're just up there just and on just hanging on for the ride, trying to catch a moment of bliss while they can before they inevitably fall to their death.

SPEAKER_06 1:24:03

And it's hard to find a moment of bliss in this world when you pee every bed when you get drunk. Yes. And there we go. That's the pod.

SPEAKER_05 1:24:11

Bingo. And and you what you think is a private moment of pissing your bed. It wasn't because the flock camera caught it. And then you get accused of cheating. And you're like, no, I was just trying to. You're like, she's like, why'd you leave late at night? You're like, well, I was leaving to go change my sheets. I needed to go to the laundromat to wash the piss out of my seat. She goes, I don't know, I think you're cheating on me. She checks the cameras, she sees that you are in fact telling the truth.

SPEAKER_06 1:24:36

Yep. I wish I had a flock camera for my ex-girlfriend. Alrighty, folks, that has been the podcast. I hope you've enjoyed it. Once again, I've been Bo Bigelow. Just to plug, we have an amazing show coming up this Friday, 6 p.m. at New York Comedy Club in the East Village. It's called Chucklefest. It's gonna be me and my co-host Connor Kinsley, and a bunch of other funny people.

SPEAKER_05 1:24:59

Guys, it's this Friday, July 31st, 6 p.m. Ticket link is in the show notes below. So go grab a ticket to snag a tick. Snag a tick. All right.