Embodied Integrative Healing Podcast - Episode 1 Exploring Awareness

What is awareness? We often hear about becoming more aware or more present, but what does that actually mean? And why is awareness important on the healing journey? In this episode I explore what awareness is, how to access it, and what qualities awareness has, including the innate and immense capacity for healing. I also explore the relationship between awareness and life energy (prana, qi, ki, etc.) and how by accessing one we can tap into the other.  This episode also includes a guided meditation.  

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:20

So hey everyone, so glad to be here with you all. Um I hope you're all doing well. And and if you're uh struggling, um that's okay too. That's part of our growth, and we can be with that, we can look at that, and we can let that be there too, and that's um, you know, that's what we're there to what we're here to heal. Um uh but mainly what I wanted to talk about today is uh awareness. So um awareness uh is everywhere. Awareness is everywhere. Fundamentally, it's just everywhere because it is everywhere, and also in another sense, it's everywhere because it's talked about a lot in uh spiritual places and other places, and I think that's really great that um we're so aware of awareness. Um and I think it's just really helpful to continually continually look at what awareness is, um, investigate it. Um, you know, we could uh start by kind of talking about it conceptually, but then really seeing and experiencing it for ourselves. Um and so I just wanted to share just the recent experience of awareness that I was having today. Um so I was doing my morning practices, my spiritual practices and meditations and kind of like formal type uh practices that I do in the morning before I kind of start the day. And uh when I was doing that, um I just felt this sense of there's something behind everything, something behind and beneath everything everywhere. And I, and it's almost almost like I could see it, but not really visually, but like there's the sense that there's something, you know, behind all of this, behind everything, within it, behind it. Um, and it's just this very spacious, very peaceful, loving uh awareness. Um something that's not physical, um, not something you can hold on to, but it's very there. And um and and I just had this kind of sense of uh almost like metaphors of what it's like to experience awareness. And it's one I thought of that reminds me of a teaching I heard from the uh uh that the Buddha said, and um, I don't remember exactly the way the Buddha had said it or that it was written that Buddha said it, but um but basically something like uh you know, that experience of like liberation or freedom or healing and peace is like a cool breeze on a really hot day. Or uh like sitting underneath the tray, a tree in the shade on a really hot day, like you've been really hot, and then you find some shade, and it's just like ah, and it's just so refreshing and like a relief, like ah, this relief. Or uh like listening to the rain. I like listening to the rain when it's raining and you feel the sense of the rain, the sound of the rain, the smell of the rain, and it just feels very present and fresh, and that feeling of freshness and aliveness and and presence, um cool breeze, you know, on your skin. Um kind of that experience to me feels like that's like what awareness is like a lot of times. It's just like this, ah, you can almost literally just like breathe a sigh of relief. Ah, you kind of found this space, this peace that you're looking for. And it's very alive, it's very refreshing. Something I like to talk about. Um it's these kind of these two aspects, these two kind of things of awareness, and then this life energy. And life energy in the um Chinese tradition, it's uh called qi. And um in Japan, Japanese tradition, it's called uh ki, like in Reiki, like Reiki healing ki. Um, and in the Indian tradition from India, it's uh known as prana. And um and it's really it's life energy, it's like the energy of life, what life is, the energy of what makes something alive. Because you know, I've thought about that a lot. Like, what makes something alive? And you know, like science is kind of like tried to define what life is by these different functions and things, and which is cool, and but um it's like it's just what makes something alive, whatever it is that's making that thing be alive, that's the life energy. That's what makes it alive. The energy, the life energy, the chi, the prana is what's alive, and that's inside of us, inside of everything that's alive, and it's very uh enlivening. Um, it's it's when you tap into it and and cultivate it and connect with it, it just makes you feel very alive. Um, just try and imagine or remember some time when you felt really, really alive, when you just felt so alive. Maybe you're in nature, maybe you're with a friend talking about something or with someone you really love. Or um, for me, it happens a lot of times when I play music. So maybe if you play music or when you're listening to music or anything else, we just felt so alive. That experience of aliveness is the life energy or the chi or prana. And so that life energy, it's it's connected with awareness. It's like it's part of awareness. It's this thing that's really feels impossible to describe. And I'm still like investigating what it is, and but it's it's like there's this awareness, this knowing and seeing and what's behind everything, noticing it. And then that awareness that has really no nothing physical about it, it also has this energy, this like life energy to it. And so when you tap into the awareness, you experience that life energy. And that's what that kind of refreshing feeling is, like the wind blowing, cool wind blowing on you, cool breeze. That refreshing alive feeling is that life energy that's part of awareness. So if you tap into awareness, you can tap into that life energy. Um, and I really feel like that's what um meditation is really all about is tapping into awareness. And then when you tap into that awareness, you connect with the life energy. Kind of it's almost you could think of it, it's not exactly like that always, but almost like first you experience the awareness, and then by getting to the awareness, that brings you to the life energy. Then other practices like qigong, which is a practice that I teach and like to help people with, is is more focused on the energy, the life energy. It's all about connecting with the life energy through all these really cool and fun, helpful practices that you do with your body. Um, but what's happening is when you're doing those practices, you're connecting with that life energy, but then that life energy, when you connect with it, it makes you very aware. Like when you feel that life energy through the qigong practice, you also feel very present. You'll notice that any anytime you're doing that practice, or if you've been someone who's like really connected to that life energy, they're also very present. So it's like you can kind of come to it from either side, from the life energy to get to awareness, or for the awareness to get to life energy. And when you're doing the qigong practice, you also are cultivating the awareness, even though you're not trying to do that specifically on purpose, which is like when you're doing a meditation, but when you're doing the qigong, you are becoming more aware because you're noticing the energy in your body, you're noticing your body itself as you move around. And uh as you do that, that's awareness, that noticing is the awareness too. So they really go together. Um, isn't even as I'm talking about it, I can just like feel that in my hands, you know. I just love this qigong practices of just moving your body, moving the energy. It just feels so good and healing and so uh important and helpful. Um, that's just why I love uh and want to support people with that and help people connect with that. Because I feel like a lot of people, seems like a lot of times don't feel life energy in themselves. So they're not that connected with it, and they maybe feel down and out of energy and stuff, and it doesn't have to be that way. We can we can connect with that, cultivate it. So um, yeah. So yeah, just this presence, this this only it's not really a thing, but this something that's behind everything. So I just yeah, invite you to um to notice what's noticing. Or even if you just notice something, like if you just we can even just do like a short meditation. Let's let's do that. Let's just do a real short meditation here together. So if you're just sitting, or you can be lying down, and if you just notice your body sitting or lying down. So the minute you just kind of notice your body, there's probably thoughts there. But if you just don't push the thoughts away, but if you just become less interested in them because you're more interested in noticing your body instead, then you're noticing of your body, kind of the you can notice the shape of your body, the feeling of your body, the sense of like having a body, you know, what your body kind of feels like, what it's you know, this kind of physicality of it. You might feel sensations in per certain parts of your body. Some might feel good, some might not feel good. Some might just feel neutral, you might feel space in some places in your body. Some places in your body you might feel like a tightness or or you might even feel even if it's not tight, it's just like very like dense, or there's like you can just feel the physicalness of it.

SPEAKER_00 10:11

But just all this noticing can quiet the mind a bit, and then also the noticing itself, that that's what I want to point out here, is the noticing itself is the awareness.

SPEAKER_02 10:30

Like you notice your body, because there's your body, right? That's what you're noticing. But then there's the noticing itself, the noticing of the body. I like that word uh notice because it's a very light word, but it's very powerful, but it doesn't feel too, you know, heavy or intense. It's very light. It's just, oh like my body's here.

SPEAKER_00 10:49

I noticed that. What's it like to notice your body?

SPEAKER_02 10:56

Not not really like thinking about your body, but just like noticing, you know, the feeling and sensation experience of your body. And I notice what happens for me as I do that even just now. You can probably hear I'm just taking a deep breath. Just naturally, not not even intentionally doing that. I just as I notice the body, my body just naturally wants to have a nice big breath.

SPEAKER_01 11:32

I love breathing.

SPEAKER_02 11:35

As I say that, I realize that that might sound silly or strange. Uh, because obviously, you know, breathing's so important for us to be alive, but like experiencing breathing, experiencing your breath.

SPEAKER_01 11:49

Experiencing that breath.

SPEAKER_02 11:58

Not trying to do anything with your breath. Just noticing when you breathe. And maybe you have those nice big breaths that are coming naturally, like that's happening for me now for me right now. Or maybe you have just like little small breaths that aren't that noticeable. Maybe your breath is sh short, maybe it's longer. But just like noticing the experience of breathing, feeling air going in your body. You can feel how deep it goes into your body. And then at some point what often happens is this sense of presence or awareness will kinda show itself. And if you've not experienced it before, it might be uh startling, it might be amazing, it might be just peaceful, um, but just noticing, wow, there's something else here besides the body I'm noticing and the breath I'm noticing. There's something else here. What is that?

SPEAKER_00 13:33

And without like thinking about it or almost even looking for it, you're just kind of noticing there's like something here, and it's very natural. And if if we're to just try and describe it, would it be something that's kind of like spaciousness?

SPEAKER_02 13:52

Uh something kind of like the sky or the space around you.

SPEAKER_01 13:58

Just kind of this almost neutral space, sense of space and openness.

SPEAKER_02 14:14

You can notice what that spaciousness is like, what it's like to notice that. This whole process of meditation, we can just make it be very light and natural. Not like trying to force something or really to do something a certain way, but more just kind of like exploring and kind of less like checking things out. Like if you were a kid like in a forest or in nature or something, you're just kind of like, whoa, just looking around, kind of checking things out, and I notice your mind is getting quieter.

SPEAKER_01 15:27

It becomes more apparent.

SPEAKER_00 15:30

It's just naturally quiet.

SPEAKER_02 15:32

This awareness is just naturally quiet, actually. So without even trying to be quiet or make our minds be quiet, but by tapping into the awareness itself, it's naturally quiet, so we become quiet. And uh you can also notice if this awareness is becoming more apparent, you might start to feel this energy associated with it. It might feel kind of enlivening. Like there's some life there. It's not just kind of just like a something just empty with nothing there, but it's like there's this kind of life energy in it. Very alive.

SPEAKER_00 16:16

And if you notice that energy, just yeah, be with that. Let that be there.

SPEAKER_02 16:23

You can feel that energy in your body. Like just right now, I'm noticing it in my hands, especially some of my fingertips, my fingers, noticing it in my lower belly, a little bit in my chest.

SPEAKER_01 16:45

Just yeah, just notice what it's like to connect with that energy.

SPEAKER_02 17:19

So then we can start to just wrap up this little meditation and knowing that that awareness and this life energy is still there, we can if our eyes were closed, we can gradually open our eyes. Most likely we were kind of sitting still, probably, although we don't necessarily have to, but if we had been, we might move our body a lot or a little bit, a little or a lot. I really like doing that out of door meditation, not feeling like I have to stay all still, but let's like, ah, move my shoulders around, move my arms, move my legs around, you know, because life energy doesn't just stay in one place, it does move. Because it's life and life moves. So yeah, that's just a little exploration of awareness today and that life energy, chi prana. Um, something I just want that I hope is communicated to you all listening is that this is accessible to anyone. It's not like a high-level practice for masters or like a secret practice or like an esoteric practice or something like that. Um, it's really not because everyone has awareness. We're using it all the time. It's with us all the time, and everyone has this life energy. It's what makes us alive. So, really, anybody can tap into it. So uh yeah, thank you so much for joining, for listening. Um, as always, just want to let you all know that uh in addition to this podcast where I share these explorations, um, I also do healing work um one-on-one with clients. Um you can check out my website, check out the link to go to my website to find out all about that. And in those sessions, we explore what we were just exploring here, um, but we do so in the context of seeing what is arising for you, um, what you're struggling with or what you're working through. Um, and and then we can apply, I use a few modalities you can see on my website, but Chi Gung's one of them, meditation, uh, work of Byron Katie, which is like a type of inquiry. I use um uh uh Reiki energy healing, and yeah, so um, if you're interested, you can uh check that out and uh hope to uh be with you again soon.