What is Wholehearted Living?

You can be sincere, faithful, and still feel split in two. One version of you shows up for work, another for home, another for church, and somewhere underneath all of it is a tired heart trying to hold everything together. I’m Cheri Cochran, and this first conversation introduces Wholehearted Pursuits, a podcast for anyone who wants deeper connection with God, themselves, and others, and who is done mistaking striving for spiritual growth.

We start with Jesus’ words about the greatest commandment, because it names the goal with simple clarity: love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and love your neighbor as yourself. From there, we get honest about what wholehearted living is not. It’s not white-knuckle willpower. It’s not “trying harder” Christianity. It’s not perfectionism with a Bible verse taped on top. Wholeheartedness means moving toward healing and wholeness, and bringing your entire self forward instead of living a compartmentalized, fragmented life.

We also talk about a timeless trap: calling raw reactions “authentic.” If we never pause to discern what’s underneath our words and behaviors, we can confuse what feels natural with what’s merely familiar. Using stories from everyday life and years of communication coaching, I unpack how growth often begins at the edge of discomfort, and why the Holy Spirit’s gentle work helps us respond instead of react.

The most comforting foundation is this: God goes first. Our wholehearted pursuit is always a response to God’s wholehearted pursuit of us, revealed in Jesus’ life, death, resurrection, and ongoing presence. If you’re hungry for spiritual formation, emotional health, and a faith that integrates your real life, let's walk this together. Subscribe, share this with a friend, and leave a review so more people can find the journey.

Transcript

Welcome And Origin Story

Cheri Cochran 0:07

Welcome to Wholehearted Pursuits, where we journey together towards deeper connection with God, ourselves, and others, learning to bring our whole selves to our whole lives as Jesus did. I'm Cheri Cochran and I am so glad that you are here. As I sat down to press record on this very first podcast episode, it did make me laugh because I had a memory, like a full circle moment memory from decades ago. I'm not going to tell you exactly how many because that would be embarrassing. But when I was five, my mom used to entertain me by giving me our 1970s Radio Shack cassette recorder and the little microphone, taught me how to press record, record myself talking about whatever, and to play it back just as a way to keep me entertained while she took care of the younger siblings. I'm the oldest of four. There were three at the time. So she didn't even know that she was giving me practice for decades later. And I know I said 70s, so I've given myself away. But here we are. And it is kind of funny that I'm pressing record once again, but with a completely different purpose. And I'm really glad that you are

The Greatest Commandment Vision

Cheri Cochran 1:15

here. So what is wholehearted pursuits about? Why, why am I stepping into this? Why are we doing this at all? Well, I like probably many of you as a follower of Jesus, I want to lean with all of my heart into Jesus' command/slash invitation that he gives as a response to the question in the New Testament what is the greatest commandment? And he shares and repeats back from Deuteronomy: love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and love your neighbor as yourself. Upon these hang all the law and the prophets. Now, what that means to me, upon these hang all the law and the prophets, is he's he's saying that in some way, everything that the scripture reveals to us about God's heart, his way, his will, the way that he moves, the way that he's inviting us, in some way falls under this umbrella of loving the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and loving our neighbor as ourself. So if we move towards those things, we are in effect moving towards everything that Jesus invites us to, this abundant life, this way of living as a fully participating member of God's kingdom today, that helps to bring life to the earth, that helps to bring life to our families, to our homes. I mean, can you imagine what it would be like if you felt the interior freedom to show up with your whole self in every environment? That maybe that raging anxiety, that that constant second guessing, I know that I have dealt with for most of my life, that it was just a little quieter, maybe not gone, but that you at least knew that you had the tools to show up in spite of the voices raging in your head or the questions that you're wondering. Or sometimes we move into spaces where our physical body is having a response or it becomes activated. But what if we knew that through our deep connection with God, ourselves, and others, that we had what we needed to be able to choose to respond in a certain way in spite of these reactions and responses? So as we look to serve Jesus with all of our heart, to love him with all of our being, to offer him all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and to love others as ourselves, then that to me is why we are embarking on a journey of wholeheartedness in the first place. Now, I am not offering this because I'm an expert on wholehearted living. I'm not. This has been a very important and very central part of my own journey with Jesus and my own journey in life. So I'm not here as an expert, but as a fellow journeyer. And I'm just inviting you to come along so we can learn from one another, encourage one another, inspire one another. One of my very favorite verses in the whole Bible is Hebrews 10, 25, where it says, let us spur one another on to love and good works. And that isn't just like come alongside and tell each other to do better. No, this is like a how can we, how can we just like really get in there deeply connected with each other and to encourage each other along the way that we go, come on, we can do this. We can, we can live this life with Jesus. We can do this together. That's the heart from which it is born.

What Wholeheartedness Is Not

Cheri Cochran 4:34

What do I mean by the term wholehearted pursuits? Well, first let me tell you what I don't mean. So, what wholeheartedness does not mean is living from a place of willpower, of you know, doubling down on the striving and the effort and just you know trying harder living. Wholeheartedness does not mean tapping more deeply into my own will as a resource for living, as the as the fount for life. It doesn't work. We don't have what we need to live a wholehearted life. That is at least in part why Jesus came, because we can't just double down and lean on willpower to move towards abundant, deeply connected life with Jesus. But the other thing that wholeheartedness is not is doing better life, trying harder life, getting it all together life. It's not about perfecting something, it's not about being or pursuing perfection. That's also an unreachable goal. That's not the point of the journey. Now, in our journey with Jesus, it might require effort. It might require that we aim our willpower in a certain way, but our willpower is not the source of this life with Jesus. He is. So, what do I mean by wholeheartedness in the context of wholehearted pursuits? Well, first the word whole has two meanings and both are important here. The first is like the opposite of broken, it's it's whole, it's restored, healed. Any variation of the word, like matured or completed, those types of things. So our whole heart is both the parts of us that have received a healing touch that have been restored, that are now the opposite of broken. And there's many parts of us that are in progress right now and have yet to be pursued or to be realized, that they're they're in the future. But we're talking about wholehearted, we're talking about restoration, healing, completeness. The other part of it, whole, is entire, which is the opposite of divided, which is the opposite of partial. So we're talking about we are wanting to live from a healed heart. We're living in a place where we are receiving healing and wholeness from God. We are moving towards healing, wholeness, and restoration from God. And we're living, bringing our whole self forward, not dividing ourselves into parts or only halfway showing up. The word heart, my definition, Sherry's definition here, is referring to the innermost part of us. It is the deepest, truest self. Now, here's the thing: we only have a perception of our deepest, truest self, but every single one of us needs to be introduced to our deepest, fullest self by the creator, the one that created us, the one that made us. So even being able to discern and identify what is my innermost person is a journey in itself with Jesus to help us to see ourselves as He does. Because there's a whole mishmash in there of experiences and perceptions and an image we have of ourselves that has been shaped by our life experiences, our teaching, our culture. A lot of different factors come into play into the image we hold of our innermost self that we would call our heart. But God is the only one that can show us our true heart, our true self. And he accompanies us on this journey. Pursuit, it's not about being driven. The pursuit is about being drawn by the Spirit of God Himself towards a greater revelation, a greater understanding of who he is, who we are, and who others are, and about the kingdom in general. So this pursuit, though, what it means is it's not a driving, it's not a striving, it is an intentional focus. It's action, it's movement towards to the best of our capacity, our best of our capability, but it isn't driving, it's responding to being drawn.

Healing And Integration Of The Heart

Cheri Cochran 8:42

So the problem is that we live in a space and a place that encourages us towards the opposite. I'm not dogging on our modern culture. Like we live in a place where we are drawn into kind of like curating our lives into a digital version and an in-person version and our work version and our home version and our spiritual life and our everyday life. And where we find that we've kind of compartmentalized all these things. Of course we have. So this is not new. This is part of being human. But it's easier than ever to live divided and fragmented lives today. It's easier than ever to have a side of us that we put on a video or that we put on a camera or that we show in our office, but then have a whole different side that's hidden away. It's easier than ever, or it appears to me, you know, in all of my years, of course, I have this grand view of all of history, but here I am saying it's easier than ever. Just go with it, okay? But the second part of the problem is the way that we tend to use the word, like, well, I'm just speaking from the heart. Because speaking from our heart, the way that we tend to see that or tend to encourage one another is more like a raw version of our heart. It is, it is the undiscerned heart, the undiscovered heart. It's very easy to encourage one another. Well, just go with your heart. But if we haven't examined our heart in the presence of God and in the presence of others that can help us, we may be operating and usually are operating out of something that is just kind of a raw version. An example would be uh I have a granddaughter that's under a year old. Thank you for asking. Of course, I had to bring that up because she is just the delight of our whole family's life right now. And her reactions to the world right now are all raw because she's an infant. She only has one way to react, and that is raw. She's gonna cry, she's gonna fuss, she might smile or giggle. She all of her reactions are raw. She doesn't even have the capacity yet to discern for herself what is going on under the crying. So that's up to her parents, my daughter, my son-in-law, to be able to actually sit with this raw blast of crying or whatever it is. We'll do she's crying because it's easiest, and to be able to go, what is going on under here? What is the authentic reason for this expression that she's giving? Is it that she's tired, she's hungry, her tummy hurts, she needs a diaper change, she's been overstimulated, she doesn't recognize the stranger. There's any number of reasons why she could be having a response or a way of showing up in the world in that moment. Similarly, as we grow up, we all have the same things. We're tired, we're hungry, we're overstimulated, something hurts, something needs to be changed. But if we just act out and we lash out or we speak out without there being a moment at least of pause to say, let's let's discern what is under this quote unquote authenticity of my reaction, of I'm just gonna say it, we can get into trouble. And that's not to say everything we say has to be neat and nice and have a bow on it. That's not what I'm saying. But to learn how to discern what's under the surface in the movements of our own heart by the help of the Holy Spirit and people around us. We're not wanting to participate. A wholehearted pursuit is not just leaning into the natural divisions in our lives and not actually seeking to integrate them. It is also not just speaking from the heart, quote unquote, in a way that is actually raw, unfiltered, unexamined, undiscerned. It's moving into like, Lord, we want to echo the prayer from Psalms. Unite my heart, that I might fear your name. And it's also an invitation to examine my heart. Now, some of us are really afraid of that because we believe that what the examined heart or when when God interacts with our heart, that we're gonna come up lacking and we're gonna just end up with condemnation and shame. And I believe that over time, as we take this journey together, that that fear, that anxiety, that your heart will be seen by Jesus and will be found as lacking or wanting, I believe that over time that that fear will begin to dissipate and that he will give you the assurance that you need to relax into being loved. But for now, we want to move past this raw, quote unquote authentic expression of how we show up in the world, whether that is louder and bigger, or whether that's overly withdrawn or pulling back or not even really fully showing up to the moment. For many, many years I've been a public speaking and a communication coach. And one of the things that I encountered pretty regularly whenever people are being encouraged to level up their public speaking skills, is that I would notice something that wasn't translating well for their audience or it wasn't coming through as authentic or it wasn't coming through as confident or whatever. And I would point out the thing, ask them to try something different. And so frequently, like if I was doing group coaching, you'd be a hundred percent of the time, somewhere along the way, one person in the group hits a wall of discomfort, which I fully understand because I've been coached, and basically they push back and there's a resistance to say, Well, I've just got to go with what's natural for me. I just, I, you know, this just doesn't feel natural. And and, you know, and I'm I'm just really committed to authenticity and being natural. Now, with kindness, I do my best to encourage them, just try this. Okay, I'm all for being natural, but just try this thing that feels out of your comfort zone right now. And then we would get bit the feedback from the group. And a hundred percent of the time, if they lean into that discomfort, they end up with growth, with movement, and something that actually connects more deeply. Because it was very easy for us. The point of that story is it's very easy for us to confuse as we're on a whole hearted pursuit, to confuse what feels natural and think that that's the real us. When what we're really saying is this is what's familiar, this is the me, the heart, the way, the way I see God, the way I see myself, and the way I see others naturally, quote unquote. What we're actually speaking to most of the time is this is the way that feels familiar. This is the way that I, the image that I hold of how things work. So the whole heart of pursuit is to respond to Jesus' drawing, to move towards a different way of seeing, a different way of loving, and a different way of showing up in the world around us. Not because the way our natural way is something shameful necessarily, but because it's not always helpful. And he wants to reform what has been deformed through our lives, which could be through hurt, pain, overt teaching experiences, things that we've assumed to be true along the way. I find the most encouraging part of this journey to wholehearted living, wholehearted pursuits, is that we are

God Initiates And We Respond

Cheri Cochran 17:00

always a responder to God, and we are never the initiator. It is not on us to get this started. Our movements towards God are always a response to his wholehearted pursuit of us. Our movements towards God are always a response to his wholehearted pursuit of us. Before we were ever even able to respond with our whole heart, God went first. Jesus goes first. Jesus' incarnation shows us and he paved a way through his death, his burial, and his resurrection, and the fact that he lives today, he paves the way for us to enter into life with him and to be able to wholeheartedly pursue this life with him. The scripture says that while we were yet sinners, that Jesus died for the ungodly. He died before we had it all together. He died for us and he was raised from the dead, and he lives today and is still actively interceding for us, the scripture says. All of those things are in place. He is still wholeheartedly pursuing you and me, and he always will be. So we don't have to look to our own willpower or our own brain to be able to figure this all out, to have it all together and to get it all right. No, we're just aiming our heart to say, Lord, would you do the work within me because you are always pursuing me? Would you do the work within me? Would you help me to notice things? Would you help me to respond to things? Would you give me the freedom that I seek to be able to love you, to serve you, and to praise you forever? He is always wholeheartedly pursuing you and me. And so our movements towards him, they're always a response. He always initiates, and we always have the opportunity and the invitation to respond. So we don't have to figure this all out as much as together to be able to notice where is there initiation and invitation coming from God in my life and your life today, and what step towards response could He be inviting me to take today? Now, wholehearted pursuit is not pursuit of a way like a dot on a map we're going to arrive on. This is this is the nature of living for Jesus, living with Jesus for the rest of our lives. The wholehearted pursuit goes on forever, but it isn't a drudgery, it isn't a duty, it isn't toiling. It actually becomes more and more beautiful as we relax into that we are the object of a wholehearted pursuit by the most holy, most powerful God. He is pursuing you, he is pursuing me, and we get to respond. We don't have to figure it out, we don't have to initiate it, we don't have to know exactly what we're doing, but together, we can notice where is God initiating, where is God inviting, where is he pursuing, and we can gradually learn to relax into being loved by

Connection And What Comes Next

Cheri Cochran 20:17

God. So going back to the very beginning, wholehearted pursuits, we're together seeking deeper connections with God, ourselves, and others, in learning how to bring our whole selves to our whole lives as Jesus did. Well, why is connection in this at all? Because as we relax into being loved, and that deepens our sense of secure connection with God Himself and also people around us, it opens the door for our hearts to become more and more deeply connected to God, to others, and to ourselves without judgment, without condemnation, without fear of being cast aside, without fear of abandonment. As our hearts become more secure in that way of living, we become much more courageous to keep moving and responding and trying and going after it and stepping out and responding and dreaming, and all of those things become more and more alive in us. So the journey, while it is a journey for the rest of our lives, it isn't a slog for the rest of our lives. There is abundant life to be found in and through Jesus, through deep connection and communion with Him, who lives deep within our hearts, who's empowering us, who's inspiring us, who's pursuing us and inviting us to bring our whole selves to our whole lives to love God and others and ourselves with our whole hearts, just as he did. On this very first episode, I hope your heart has been stirred to say, hey, there's a way of living that our hearts are hungry for and that we can learn. I'm learning. I hope that you are willing to join this journey with me, and as we learn from other people together, as our hearts are inspired from other people together who are also on this journey, who have things and pieces to offer of this beautiful kaleidoscope of life with God. Along the way, some of the episodes will be me sharing from my heart as I have today, but most of them will be with guests, will be discussions and interviews and being able to learn together and to notice and respond to God's invitations together. I don't know about you, but I'm down for the journey for wholeheartedness, and I hope that you are too. I hope to see you next time.