WEBVTT 00:00:00.080 --> 00:00:01.520 Well, hey everybody, it's great to see you. 00:00:01.600 --> 00:00:06.160 Whether you're here in the room or joining us online, I'm honored to have you along for the ride. 00:00:06.240 --> 00:00:17.280 And before we get to the content for today, just an honest confession: if I don't seem to be quite as nimble as normal, it's not because I'm not trying to crease my shoes. 00:00:17.440 --> 00:00:18.719 Okay, that still is a thing. 00:00:18.800 --> 00:00:20.719 It's a battle, but we're working on it. 00:00:21.039 --> 00:00:22.960 It's actually because I had this great idea. 00:00:23.120 --> 00:00:32.719 My two oldest sons are painting houses this summer, and they've got this big house in Ottawa Hills, very high on the sides, lots of soffits or those overhang eve things. 00:00:32.799 --> 00:00:34.240 And I think, you know what I'm gonna do? 00:00:34.399 --> 00:00:35.759 I'm gonna go help them. 00:00:35.920 --> 00:00:40.159 Because I was a painter back in college, which is only a few years ago. 00:00:41.039 --> 00:00:52.799 And of course, when I got there, I realized they had not done much at all with the really high soffits, and so I, as a superhero would decided I would climb up on that ladder and start painting. 00:00:52.960 --> 00:00:59.920 And about seven hours later, I got I got done, and my body went into shock and rebellion. 00:01:00.079 --> 00:01:01.679 Have you experienced this? 00:01:02.079 --> 00:01:07.519 So we drove home and we went to see the new Spider-Man movie because that's what Jesus would do. 00:01:07.760 --> 00:01:15.680 And at the 80 level 5, and they have those seats that come up like this, and about 20 minutes into the movie, we were just getting started. 00:01:15.920 --> 00:01:22.879 My my legs, my calves, everything just locked up, and I had to stand up in the movie. 00:01:23.040 --> 00:01:25.439 And my wife says to me, Are you okay? 00:01:25.599 --> 00:01:26.879 And I said, No. 00:01:27.200 --> 00:01:35.599 And so she's worried, and I'm walking, I end up standing in the back of the theater like a weirdo because my legs weren't working. 00:01:35.760 --> 00:01:41.120 So, anyway, all that to say, um, I don't know what the lesson is from that, but we painted the house. 00:01:41.200 --> 00:01:53.200 So, anyway, we are in the third week of a series called Hard One Wisdom, uh, in which we're gonna explore the life of uh Israel's most famous citizens, a guy named David. 00:01:53.359 --> 00:01:58.959 And to get to go of what I want to talk to you about today, I want to ask you another question this week. 00:01:59.120 --> 00:02:05.120 It goes like this Have you ever done something you wish you could undo? 00:02:06.319 --> 00:02:08.319 And I know, yes, right? 00:02:08.560 --> 00:02:20.960 Maybe it was something you said, something you posted, somewhere you went, a relationship you pursued, and like almost immediately after you did it, you wish you hadn't, you wish life had an undo button. 00:02:21.199 --> 00:02:32.319 Uh and I thought about this a lot preparing for this talk, and I'm convinced that the decisions that we come to regret the most, well, they're rarely made when we're thinking clearly. 00:02:32.479 --> 00:02:32.719 Right? 00:02:32.879 --> 00:02:42.000 In my experience, they're made when we're angry or exhausted or afraid, or when we've been wounded in one way or another, we're compromised. 00:02:42.159 --> 00:02:51.759 And I bring this up because in the narrative we get to unpack today, uh David almost had one of those moments, came right to the edge. 00:02:51.919 --> 00:02:59.360 And in fact, I would argue that if the story we're about to read had gone differently, I think it's fair to say we'd remember David differently. 00:02:59.680 --> 00:03:11.120 But the story takes place during an incredibly challenging season of his life, one in which Israel's king, a man named Saul, had become completely obsessed with killing him. 00:03:11.280 --> 00:03:15.840 And as the narrative begins, David has literally spent years on the run. 00:03:16.240 --> 00:03:24.400 Along the way, he's amassed a following of a few hundred men who are convinced that someday the promise will come true and he will be the king of Israel. 00:03:24.560 --> 00:03:31.280 But at the time of this story, David is physically exhausted and he's emotionally discouraged. 00:03:31.599 --> 00:03:37.360 And I think that's important for us to note because, again, in my experience, most people don't make their worst decisions in a vacuum. 00:03:37.520 --> 00:03:48.319 It usually happens after a season, sometimes even years, of disappointment, followed by something that initiates an oversized emotional response. 00:03:48.479 --> 00:03:49.759 You ever had one of those? 00:03:50.000 --> 00:04:02.800 Maybe it's like an unfair comment or a betrayal or even a simple act of disrespect that sort of lights your proverbial fuse and causes everything you've been carrying within you to come rushing to the surface. 00:04:03.039 --> 00:04:05.280 I think it happens for us, it happened for David. 00:04:05.360 --> 00:04:06.719 Um here's the setup. 00:04:06.800 --> 00:04:14.960 After surviving, uh, after years rather, of surviving instead of just living, David finally sensed that life might be getting a little better. 00:04:15.120 --> 00:04:16.240 He might catch a break. 00:04:16.319 --> 00:04:20.959 And the author of this story tells us that it was uh sheep shearing season in Israel. 00:04:21.040 --> 00:04:21.920 And I know what you're thinking. 00:04:22.079 --> 00:04:23.680 Oh, right, hang with me, right? 00:04:23.920 --> 00:04:31.199 Sheep shearing season, and that that generally is a time of celebrating and feasting and acts of generosity. 00:04:31.519 --> 00:04:40.319 The narrator also tells us that for months leading up to this season, David and his men had been protecting the flocks of a wealthy man named Nabal. 00:04:40.480 --> 00:04:47.360 And so when sheep shearing season arrived, David sent ten of his men to Nabal with a request. 00:04:47.519 --> 00:04:48.560 Here's what he told them. 00:04:48.639 --> 00:04:53.120 He said, I want you to go up to Nabal at Carmel and greet him in my name. 00:04:53.360 --> 00:04:59.519 Say to him, Long life to you, good health to you and your household, and good health to all that's yours. 00:04:59.759 --> 00:05:03.199 Now I hear that it's sheep shearing time. 00:05:03.519 --> 00:05:11.680 He says, When your shepherds were with us, we did not mistreat them, and the whole time they were at Carmel, nothing of theirs was missing. 00:05:11.920 --> 00:05:14.800 Ask your own servants, and they will tell you. 00:05:15.040 --> 00:05:19.920 Therefore, he says, Be favorable towards my men, since we come at a festive time. 00:05:20.160 --> 00:05:26.560 Please give them, please give your servants and your son David whatever you can find for them. 00:05:26.800 --> 00:05:32.079 And just notice, David isn't demanding, he's asking for kindness in return for kindness. 00:05:32.160 --> 00:05:34.399 He's basically saying, Hey, we we tried to bless you. 00:05:34.560 --> 00:05:37.680 If you're willing, would you bless us? 00:05:38.560 --> 00:05:46.959 And now, before I show you Nabal's response, I want you to imagine how David might have been feeling while he was waiting for his men to return. 00:05:47.120 --> 00:05:52.240 I bet he was hopeful that his life might finally be taking a turn for the better. 00:05:52.480 --> 00:05:56.480 Finally, like grace and love and peace were gonna fall on him. 00:05:56.560 --> 00:06:03.279 But then his men return empty-handed, and they relay Nabal's response to David's request. 00:06:03.439 --> 00:06:05.279 Here's what Nabal had said. 00:06:06.000 --> 00:06:08.800 Who is this David, right? 00:06:08.959 --> 00:06:10.480 Who is this son of Jesse? 00:06:10.800 --> 00:06:20.160 Why should I take my bread and water and the meat I have slaughtered for my shearers and give it to men coming from who knows where? 00:06:20.560 --> 00:06:26.959 So Nabal doesn't just refuse to help David, he humiliates David, right? 00:06:27.199 --> 00:06:29.839 And I mean, everyone in Israel knew who David was. 00:06:29.920 --> 00:06:33.040 He was Israel's national hero, he was the giant slayer. 00:06:33.120 --> 00:06:43.439 And so if you think about it, with his response, Nabal was making a statement, essentially, uh, David, you mean nothing to me. 00:06:43.680 --> 00:06:46.800 I owe you nothing, and you deserve nothing. 00:06:47.360 --> 00:06:53.759 And those words became the spark that ignited years of buried frustration in David. 00:06:53.839 --> 00:06:58.000 And suddenly all of his pent-up emotion found somewhere to land. 00:06:58.639 --> 00:07:03.680 He tells his men, each of you, strap on your sword. 00:07:03.839 --> 00:07:07.920 In other words, let's get ready to rumble. 00:07:08.079 --> 00:07:09.279 Okay, it's it's in the Hebrew. 00:07:09.360 --> 00:07:10.560 You gotta trust me on that, okay? 00:07:10.639 --> 00:07:11.360 Yeah, yeah. 00:07:11.519 --> 00:07:16.959 And 400 men begin marching towards Nabal's house. 00:07:17.279 --> 00:07:19.120 Can you picture that? 00:07:19.279 --> 00:07:25.839 400 men, swords hanging by their side, like dust rising with every step. 00:07:26.000 --> 00:07:29.839 Nobody's laughing, nobody's talking, they know where they were going. 00:07:30.000 --> 00:07:33.759 And I think word probably has already begun spreading to the countryside. 00:07:34.079 --> 00:07:36.959 David is on the way. 00:07:37.680 --> 00:07:40.879 But from David's perspective, I mean, this is revenge, right? 00:07:41.199 --> 00:07:49.920 He's gonna get back at Nabal, and revenge always feels justified when you're the one who's been hurt, doesn't it? 00:07:50.480 --> 00:08:09.759 But again, David wasn't just responding to Nabal, he's responding to everything Saul had been doing to him for years, which reminds me of something I suspect we've all experienced, and it goes like this unhealed pain has a way of looking for a new target. 00:08:10.560 --> 00:08:11.920 Ever noticed that? 00:08:12.240 --> 00:08:22.160 I mean, we think we're arguing with our spouse about the dishes, but we're really arguing about months of them feeling unheard. 00:08:23.199 --> 00:08:32.080 We think we're angry about an email that we received, but we're really frustrated that our boss didn't provide some sort of affirmation after years of disappointment. 00:08:32.720 --> 00:08:40.320 We think this person caused our reaction, but often they simply exposed what was already there. 00:08:40.960 --> 00:08:42.639 And that was certainly the case for David. 00:08:42.720 --> 00:08:47.440 I mean, he had been hunted for years, and now he becomes the hunter. 00:08:48.000 --> 00:08:53.840 He had been the victim of Saul's insecurity for years, but now the victim has become the perpetrator. 00:08:54.639 --> 00:08:59.759 It's almost like unhealed pain has a way of looking for a new target. 00:09:00.399 --> 00:09:05.279 And uh that certainly was David's story, but thankfully David isn't the only person in this story. 00:09:05.360 --> 00:09:14.399 As it turns out, one of Nabal's shepherds hears what's happening and runs to tell Nabal's wife, an incredibly wise man named Abigail. 00:09:14.720 --> 00:09:18.159 So listen to how he describes David's men to her. 00:09:18.559 --> 00:09:21.840 He says, they were very good to us. 00:09:22.240 --> 00:09:27.840 They did not mistreat us, and the whole time we were out in the fields near them, nothing went missing. 00:09:28.000 --> 00:09:34.080 Night and day, they were like a wall around us, like they protected us the whole time. 00:09:34.559 --> 00:09:37.440 We were herding our sheep near them. 00:09:37.600 --> 00:09:46.399 Now, I think it over, think it over, and see what you can do because disaster is hanging over our master and his whole household. 00:09:46.559 --> 00:09:50.960 It's interesting the shepherd doesn't say, David is coming, the shepherd says what? 00:09:51.440 --> 00:09:53.919 Disaster is coming. 00:09:54.000 --> 00:10:01.840 It's like everybody can see where David's anger is headed except for David, and I think that's often true for us. 00:10:02.639 --> 00:10:07.360 I mean, when we're angry, everyone else can see what's going on. 00:10:07.519 --> 00:10:11.360 Our spouse can, our friends can, even our kids can. 00:10:11.519 --> 00:10:16.080 But anger has a way of convincing us, hey, I'm thinking clearly. 00:10:16.399 --> 00:10:17.840 Somebody has to do something. 00:10:18.000 --> 00:10:20.799 Well, everyone around us is thinking, please don't do this. 00:10:20.960 --> 00:10:22.799 This is a very bad idea. 00:10:23.120 --> 00:10:25.519 If someone sitting next to you is doing this right now, don't nudge them. 00:10:25.600 --> 00:10:26.080 It's awkward. 00:10:26.240 --> 00:10:26.799 Right, yeah. 00:10:26.960 --> 00:10:32.720 But it's interesting, Nabal's shepherd senses there isn't time to argue with Nabal, like his boss. 00:10:32.879 --> 00:10:38.559 He bypasses the boss, goes to the only person in the household he believes can intervene in the situation. 00:10:38.639 --> 00:10:40.159 And check out what happens next. 00:10:40.320 --> 00:10:44.799 The author tells us Abigail acted quickly. 00:10:45.360 --> 00:10:51.840 She didn't panic, she doesn't complain, and she doesn't even blame her husband. 00:10:52.159 --> 00:10:53.519 She responds. 00:10:53.759 --> 00:11:10.799 The author tells us, he says, she took 200 loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, five sayahs of roasted grain that's like 10 gallons, a hundred cakes of raisins and two hundred cakes of pressed figs, and loaded them onto donkeys. 00:11:11.039 --> 00:11:16.000 Then she told her servants, go on ahead, I'll follow you. 00:11:16.159 --> 00:11:16.799 But look at this. 00:11:16.879 --> 00:11:20.639 But she did not tell her husband a ball. 00:11:21.120 --> 00:11:27.200 In other words, Abigail hears the situation and decides to move towards disaster and to try to interrupt disaster. 00:11:27.440 --> 00:11:31.840 She and her servants set out to intercept David. 00:11:32.159 --> 00:11:34.000 It's almost like a movie. 00:11:34.240 --> 00:11:41.759 David and 400 men walking towards Abigail with every step, David becoming more convinced that he's doing the right thing. 00:11:42.000 --> 00:11:48.720 And eventually they come up over a ridge, and there's like a few servants and a single woman riding donkeys with a whole bunch of stuff on it. 00:11:49.039 --> 00:11:54.559 And I wonder, in that moment, um, what was Abigail thinking? 00:11:55.360 --> 00:11:57.039 I mean, she's vastly outnumbered. 00:11:57.200 --> 00:11:59.600 What gave her the courage to do what she did? 00:12:00.159 --> 00:12:02.480 She doesn't know whether David will listen to her. 00:12:02.960 --> 00:12:04.399 She may lose her life. 00:12:04.639 --> 00:12:06.159 But here's what I think is going on. 00:12:06.240 --> 00:12:12.000 I think Abigail decides that there are moments when doing nothing is actually more dangerous than doing something. 00:12:12.240 --> 00:12:14.080 Even if that something is really, really hard. 00:12:14.159 --> 00:12:15.919 I would argue that's courage. 00:12:16.240 --> 00:12:17.759 Abigail is courageous. 00:12:17.919 --> 00:12:23.600 Courage isn't the absence of fear, it's deciding that something else matters more than the thing that we're afraid of. 00:12:23.759 --> 00:12:28.000 Abigail believed that saving lives mattered more than her protecting herself. 00:12:28.159 --> 00:12:31.360 And so she moves towards David. 00:12:31.600 --> 00:12:37.440 And just think about this: like you know, the the 400 guys, David at the front, Abigail and her crew come into view. 00:12:39.039 --> 00:12:45.279 Before David hears a word Abigail says, he has to stop because she's in his way. 00:12:45.519 --> 00:12:47.759 And that brings us to another interesting observation. 00:12:47.919 --> 00:12:54.399 I would argue that sometimes the most gracious thing that God does in our lives is to interrupt us before we do something we'll regret. 00:12:54.559 --> 00:12:56.159 Do you know what I'm talking about? 00:12:57.120 --> 00:13:02.639 Anyways, Abigail reaches David, she gets down off her donkey, and it's interesting. 00:13:02.879 --> 00:13:06.480 So she bows to the ground and begins speaking. 00:13:06.559 --> 00:13:08.960 And I think that would have caught David off guard. 00:13:09.279 --> 00:13:13.200 I mean, uh, David is an outlaw and a fugitive. 00:13:13.279 --> 00:13:14.639 He's a man on the run. 00:13:14.799 --> 00:13:18.159 And Abigail is a wealthy merchant's wife. 00:13:18.320 --> 00:13:29.840 She has every reason to stand tall, but she voluntarily lowers herself because apparently she knows that humility has a way of accomplishing what force never can. 00:13:30.080 --> 00:13:32.000 And then she speaks to David. 00:13:32.159 --> 00:13:38.399 She says, Let the blame be on me alone, my Lord. 00:13:39.759 --> 00:13:42.080 This is what peacemakers do. 00:13:42.799 --> 00:13:46.559 They're willing to take a hit if it means restoring the peace. 00:13:46.720 --> 00:13:51.600 So Abigail takes responsibility for a situation that is clearly not her fault. 00:13:51.759 --> 00:13:54.399 And then she begins talking about her husband. 00:13:54.559 --> 00:13:57.120 And she doesn't pretend he's been misunderstood. 00:13:57.360 --> 00:13:59.919 She says this pay no attention. 00:14:00.159 --> 00:14:03.120 In fact, what she says leads me to believe their relationship was interesting. 00:14:03.279 --> 00:14:04.320 Here's what she says. 00:14:04.559 --> 00:14:08.399 Please pay no attention, my lord, to that wicked man, Nabal. 00:14:08.559 --> 00:14:10.320 My mama told me I shouldn't marry him. 00:14:10.480 --> 00:14:11.759 I did anyway. 00:14:12.320 --> 00:14:13.840 He's just like his name. 00:14:13.919 --> 00:14:17.919 And check this out, his name means fool, because that's what Nabal means in Hebrew. 00:14:18.000 --> 00:14:19.279 Who names their kid that? 00:14:19.360 --> 00:14:23.360 Anyway, uh, his name means fool, and folly goes with him. 00:14:23.679 --> 00:14:30.799 And then Abigail stops talking about Nabal and she speaks directly to David. 00:14:30.960 --> 00:14:36.399 And I honestly think this is one of the wisest conversations recorded anywhere in the Bible. 00:14:36.720 --> 00:14:41.759 But before we read her words, once again, remember who she's talking to. 00:14:42.080 --> 00:14:51.039 David has been running for years, sleeping in caves, and watching Saul sit on the throne that God had promised to him one day. 00:14:51.360 --> 00:14:56.159 He's emotionally exhausted and he's just been publicly humiliated. 00:14:56.639 --> 00:15:03.519 Abigail knows he's fragile, and so she doesn't tell him to calm down or shame him for being angry. 00:15:03.679 --> 00:15:15.840 Instead, and again, this is so brilliant, she reminds him of what God had said about him because she knows that when emotions become loud, God's promises to us can begin to sound quiet. 00:15:17.279 --> 00:15:26.639 So she looks at David and she says, The Lord your God will certainly make a lasting dynasty for my Lord. 00:15:26.960 --> 00:15:34.639 Because you fight at the Lord's battles, and no wrongdoing will be found in you as long as you live. 00:15:34.799 --> 00:15:39.120 In other words, David, God hasn't changed his mind about you. 00:15:41.200 --> 00:15:43.200 Think about the power of those words. 00:15:44.480 --> 00:15:46.159 God hasn't changed his mind about you. 00:15:46.320 --> 00:15:50.399 Saul has spent years trying to convince David that his future is slipping away. 00:15:50.559 --> 00:15:53.519 Saul's trying to get in between David and his future. 00:15:53.759 --> 00:15:57.759 And so one insult from Nabal, and David almost believes it. 00:15:58.960 --> 00:16:06.639 But Abigail reminds him that God's promises have not changed just because David's emotions have. 00:16:07.360 --> 00:16:10.080 She says, you fight the Lord's battles. 00:16:10.159 --> 00:16:13.279 In other words, David, don't start fighting your own battles. 00:16:13.679 --> 00:16:16.879 If God is the one who called you, then God is the one who will establish you. 00:16:17.039 --> 00:16:20.559 You don't have to seize what God has already promised you. 00:16:20.879 --> 00:16:21.840 He is faithful. 00:16:22.480 --> 00:16:26.799 And then finally she says, No wrongdoing will be found in you as long as you live. 00:16:26.879 --> 00:16:35.600 In other words, David, don't let one painful interaction become the thing that defines the rest of your life. 00:16:36.000 --> 00:16:38.639 And if you think about it, Abigail isn't speaking to the man. 00:16:38.799 --> 00:16:40.480 David is acting like. 00:16:41.679 --> 00:16:46.080 She's speaking to the man God is shaping David to become. 00:16:48.240 --> 00:16:49.120 Can I ask you a question? 00:16:49.200 --> 00:16:52.639 Like, does somebody in your life speak to you like that? 00:16:54.240 --> 00:17:03.279 Who has the permission to remind you of who you are when your emotions are trying to convince you that you're someone else? 00:17:03.600 --> 00:17:07.920 I think we all need people like that in our lives. 00:17:08.079 --> 00:17:10.880 We all need people like Abigail in our lives. 00:17:11.039 --> 00:17:22.319 Because we all have moments when we lose our perspective and disappointment clouds our judgment, and when anger starts writing a story for our future that we'd never choose if we could see it clearly. 00:17:23.680 --> 00:17:28.720 That said, I think sometimes God's greatest gift to us isn't changing our circumstances. 00:17:28.880 --> 00:17:42.640 His greatest gift is sending someone who reminds us of who we really want to become, who speaks prophetically to us, who confronts us before we do something that we later would wish we could undo. 00:17:43.599 --> 00:17:47.279 And that's certainly what Abigail does for David. 00:17:47.440 --> 00:17:57.119 And she's not done because then she takes the conversation deeper by reminding David that in spite of what he feels, his future isn't hanging by a thread. 00:17:58.160 --> 00:18:00.640 His future is secure in God's hands. 00:18:00.960 --> 00:18:11.279 She says it this way The life of my Lord will be bound securely in the bundle of the living by the Lord your God. 00:18:12.400 --> 00:18:20.880 In the ancient world, valuable possessions were often tied together in a small pouch so that nothing precious would fall out. 00:18:21.119 --> 00:18:27.119 And Abigail looks at David right in the eyes and she says to him, This is what your life is like to God. 00:18:27.440 --> 00:18:31.839 David, you've been living as though everything depends on you. 00:18:32.559 --> 00:18:36.480 But your future has never rested in your hands. 00:18:37.039 --> 00:18:39.119 God holds your future. 00:18:39.279 --> 00:18:44.799 And then she asks him a really helpful, clarifying question. 00:18:44.960 --> 00:18:52.640 Like after affirming to David, one day God is going to fulfill every promise he's made to you, you're going to be the king, and this crisis will be behind you. 00:18:52.799 --> 00:19:06.640 She essentially asks him, Listen, when all of this is behind you, when all of the pain, all of the confusion, all of the frustration, all of the disappointment, when all that's in the rearview mirror, David, what story do you want to tell? 00:19:07.599 --> 00:19:09.759 And that's an incredible question. 00:19:10.000 --> 00:19:15.119 Because it has the power to shift perspective from the present to the future. 00:19:15.519 --> 00:19:23.920 It's a question that forces us to ask how I will feel about this decision tomorrow or a year from now. 00:19:24.720 --> 00:19:31.279 Or when I'm telling this story to my grandkids around a fire making s'mores in 20 years? 00:19:31.519 --> 00:19:38.880 I'm telling you, the strongest emotions that you feel today rarely tell you the whole truth. 00:19:39.279 --> 00:19:43.279 But thinking of the future has a way of bringing clarity. 00:19:43.839 --> 00:19:56.559 And that's why one of the wisest questions any one of us can ask before making a significant decision, it goes like this What story do I want to tell when today is nothing more than a story that I tell? 00:19:56.799 --> 00:20:01.039 What story do I want to tell when today is nothing more than a story that I tell? 00:20:01.200 --> 00:20:09.680 Abigail asked David this question, and suddenly it's like the lights come on, and David realizes he's no longer looking through the eyes of anger. 00:20:09.759 --> 00:20:10.559 That's a mistake. 00:20:10.720 --> 00:20:16.640 He's looking through the eyes of wisdom, and wisdom asks questions anger never thinks to ask. 00:20:17.039 --> 00:20:22.960 Wisdom doesn't ask what feels right, it asks us, who do I want to become? 00:20:23.680 --> 00:20:32.480 Wisdom doesn't ask us what do they deserve, but wisdom says, who will I become if I do this thing that I want to do? 00:20:33.200 --> 00:20:36.880 I think this is one of the greatest questions we can ask ourselves too. 00:20:37.440 --> 00:20:40.960 Like before you send the text, you know the one. 00:20:41.519 --> 00:20:54.480 The one you write that you haven't sent yet, but before you send the text, before you hit post, before you quit or walk away, or retaliate, or give up. 00:20:55.119 --> 00:21:04.000 Just pause and ask yourself like, is that gonna help me become the person that Jesus is forming me to be? 00:21:04.480 --> 00:21:07.279 It's a great question because this is so interesting. 00:21:07.440 --> 00:21:10.079 Often the greatest enemy of wisdom is urgency. 00:21:10.160 --> 00:21:12.079 Am I the only one that's noticed this over the years? 00:21:12.160 --> 00:21:12.400 Yeah. 00:21:12.559 --> 00:21:15.759 Like we convince ourselves, I have to do something right now. 00:21:16.000 --> 00:21:18.400 This is like on fire, we gotta move towards it. 00:21:18.480 --> 00:21:24.160 But but see, very few decisions that honor God are made in moments of emotionally charged haste. 00:21:24.960 --> 00:21:26.799 Those are the ones that leave us with regret. 00:21:26.880 --> 00:21:32.160 And that's why often the wisest thing you can do is to wait until tomorrow. 00:21:33.200 --> 00:21:36.720 Give it some space, let your emotions simmer down. 00:21:36.880 --> 00:21:41.279 Think about not only the action, but the implications of the action. 00:21:42.640 --> 00:21:43.119 Think about this. 00:21:43.200 --> 00:21:45.920 Think about your biggest regrets in life so far. 00:21:46.160 --> 00:21:49.119 How many of them happen because you waited too long? 00:21:49.440 --> 00:21:50.319 It's possible. 00:21:50.400 --> 00:21:55.200 We probably have a few of those, but how many of them happened because you acted too quickly? 00:21:55.359 --> 00:21:56.799 I took an inventory this week. 00:21:56.960 --> 00:21:58.720 A lot of mine were the too quickly part. 00:21:58.799 --> 00:21:59.039 Yeah. 00:21:59.279 --> 00:21:59.759 Like, because. 00:22:00.319 --> 00:22:13.039 You sent the text, or you quit the job, or you signed the papers, or you posted the comment, or you said the words, and as soon as they came out, you wanted to scramble and get them back, but that doesn't work that way, right? 00:22:13.200 --> 00:22:19.440 Wisdom has a way of slowing us down long enough to hear God again. 00:22:20.880 --> 00:22:26.799 And then David he hears Abigail out, and then he finally speaks, and what he says is so interesting. 00:22:26.960 --> 00:22:27.359 Look at this. 00:22:27.440 --> 00:22:35.839 He says, Praise be to the Lord, the God of Israel, who has sent you today to meet me. 00:22:36.319 --> 00:22:46.160 It's like David says, Listen, um, in encountering you, having you interrupt my mission, I have encountered the grace of God in my life. 00:22:46.319 --> 00:22:56.559 And then he says, This, speaking to Abigail, may you be blessed for your good judgment and for keeping me from bloodshed this day and from avenging myself with my own hands. 00:22:57.359 --> 00:23:02.799 Like moments before, David believed revenge was justice. 00:23:03.279 --> 00:23:05.519 And now he calls it bloodshed. 00:23:06.319 --> 00:23:08.720 I would argue that is repentance. 00:23:08.960 --> 00:23:10.000 That's what it looks like. 00:23:10.160 --> 00:23:13.920 Repentance, it's changing their behavior, but sometimes it's more than that. 00:23:14.079 --> 00:23:17.200 Sometimes it's even changing what you call things. 00:23:17.920 --> 00:23:19.920 I've been doing the pastor thing for a long time. 00:23:20.000 --> 00:23:27.039 I think it's one of the first signs that you have that God is changing someone when they stop baptizing their sins with respectable names. 00:23:27.119 --> 00:23:31.359 And all of a sudden, I'm meeting over coffee, and pride becomes pride. 00:23:32.000 --> 00:23:35.680 And gossip is gossip, and bitterness is bitterness. 00:23:35.839 --> 00:23:38.640 You're not trying to dress it up, it's like this is just where I'm at. 00:23:38.799 --> 00:23:42.240 And if I can take an honest look of where I'm at, then all of a sudden things can change. 00:23:42.319 --> 00:23:46.559 And so David stops calling revenge justice and starts calling it bloodshed. 00:23:46.960 --> 00:23:48.480 And he realizes something else. 00:23:48.640 --> 00:23:53.920 Like he was literally marching towards becoming someone he never wanted to be. 00:23:55.119 --> 00:24:01.519 And so there's this beautiful change of heart on the way to Nabal's house, and he accepts Abigail's gifts. 00:24:01.839 --> 00:24:06.960 He tells his men to stand down and he sends her home in peace. 00:24:07.119 --> 00:24:09.359 It's like the crisis is over. 00:24:10.240 --> 00:24:13.359 But here's what's so fun the story isn't yet. 00:24:13.599 --> 00:24:23.759 Because as the narrator continues, he says, hey, the next morning Abigail tells Nabal everything that's happened, and he's so overwhelmed that 10 days later you can't make this up, he dies. 00:24:24.079 --> 00:24:24.720 Seriously. 00:24:24.880 --> 00:24:26.400 That's what happens to Nabal. 00:24:26.559 --> 00:24:27.599 And it's tempting. 00:24:27.680 --> 00:24:29.680 I mean, I was when I was reading this again, I just laughed. 00:24:29.759 --> 00:24:31.200 I thought, that's so great, right? 00:24:31.279 --> 00:24:32.880 Like God took care of it. 00:24:33.119 --> 00:24:34.640 And maybe he did. 00:24:34.799 --> 00:24:39.599 But I think the bigger lesson is that David didn't have to. 00:24:41.119 --> 00:24:42.480 That's the point. 00:24:43.039 --> 00:24:50.880 David didn't need to force the outcome or write the ending because God was already writing it. 00:24:51.920 --> 00:25:03.039 And I just wonder how many regrets in our lives happened because we simply couldn't wait for God to finish writing the story. 00:25:03.599 --> 00:25:13.039 Like we felt like we had to say something, or do something, or fix something, or punish someone, or win the argument, or protect our reputation. 00:25:13.200 --> 00:25:18.240 And in the process, we almost became someone we never wanted to be. 00:25:18.400 --> 00:25:25.519 But the truth is, God is often doing far more than we can see behind the scenes. 00:25:26.079 --> 00:25:30.400 Which means that sometimes, and I don't like this, but it's true, I'm sure you won't like it either. 00:25:30.480 --> 00:25:32.000 We'll just share in that, you know. 00:25:32.640 --> 00:25:35.599 Trust sometimes looks like waiting. 00:25:37.039 --> 00:25:45.839 Trust sometimes looks like waiting because we choose to believe that God is still at work in our painful, crazy situations, even when we can't see it. 00:25:46.240 --> 00:25:50.960 If you think about it, um I was reflecting on the story this week and I thought, you know what? 00:25:51.200 --> 00:25:54.480 Humanly speaking, Abigail is the hero of the story. 00:25:54.720 --> 00:26:03.839 She interrupts violence, she brings peace, she refuses to let her husband's foolishness determine her future, even though she married a guy whose name was Fool. 00:26:04.000 --> 00:26:05.359 Come on, Abigail, right? 00:26:05.519 --> 00:26:05.759 Yeah. 00:26:05.839 --> 00:26:07.279 I bet he was just misnamed. 00:26:07.359 --> 00:26:07.759 Maybe not. 00:26:07.839 --> 00:26:08.480 Who knows, right? 00:26:08.559 --> 00:26:08.799 Yeah. 00:26:08.880 --> 00:26:12.880 And I love that Abigail never tells David, you don't have a right to be angry. 00:26:13.200 --> 00:26:13.839 He did. 00:26:14.559 --> 00:26:18.319 Instead, she reminds him of something he had forgotten. 00:26:18.799 --> 00:26:21.680 God has already secured his future. 00:26:21.839 --> 00:26:23.759 And that's why she keeps talking about tomorrow. 00:26:23.920 --> 00:26:25.519 She says, one day you'll be king. 00:26:25.759 --> 00:26:27.440 One day God will fulfill his promises. 00:26:27.680 --> 00:26:31.920 One day, David, this moment will simply become a story you tell. 00:26:32.799 --> 00:26:37.200 So again, don't let one painful afternoon rewrite the future that God has promised you. 00:26:38.079 --> 00:26:40.799 I think that's why David lowers his sword. 00:26:41.119 --> 00:26:51.680 Not because Nabal suddenly deserves mercy, but because David remembered his future wasn't in Nabal's hands, it was in God's hands. 00:26:53.519 --> 00:26:56.640 And at least for me, that's where the story points to Jesus. 00:26:57.200 --> 00:27:03.119 And if you think about it, Jesus also entrusted his future to his father. 00:27:03.920 --> 00:27:09.599 In a letter to early Christians, um, one of Jesus' first disciples, a guy named Peter, says it this way. 00:27:09.759 --> 00:27:14.799 He writes, When they hurled their insults at Jesus, he did not retaliate. 00:27:15.519 --> 00:27:18.079 When he suffered, he made no threats. 00:27:18.319 --> 00:27:19.039 And look at this. 00:27:19.200 --> 00:27:24.160 Instead, he entrusted himself to the one who judges justly. 00:27:24.319 --> 00:27:30.400 Peter says, Jesus didn't refuse to retaliate because he lacked power. 00:27:30.799 --> 00:27:38.960 He refused to retaliate because he trusted his father, just like David was invited to do. 00:27:39.599 --> 00:27:42.640 Except, of course, Jesus succeeded perfectly. 00:27:43.119 --> 00:27:44.559 David lowered his sword. 00:27:44.960 --> 00:27:47.440 Jesus stretched out his hands. 00:27:48.160 --> 00:27:53.599 David was spared from being a murderer, but he needed Abigail to remind him that his future was secure. 00:27:53.759 --> 00:27:55.759 Jesus never needed that reminder. 00:27:56.319 --> 00:28:00.799 Every step he took towards the cross, he entrusted himself to his heavenly father. 00:28:01.039 --> 00:28:06.319 And because he trusted his father, he accomplished something David never could. 00:28:06.559 --> 00:28:10.559 Jesus didn't simply avoid evil, he defeated evil. 00:28:11.279 --> 00:28:18.079 And he didn't merely spare one household, he opened the door for the salvation of the world. 00:28:20.079 --> 00:28:23.279 Which brings us back to us. 00:28:24.480 --> 00:28:29.680 Because if you think about it, every one of us is writing a story with our lives. 00:28:29.920 --> 00:28:41.839 And every conversation and conflict and disappointment is another sentence or another paragraph or another chapter in that story. 00:28:42.000 --> 00:28:56.400 And in years from now, when this season is over, as challenging as it may be, when this season is over, and when our emotions have settled and when the wounds have begun to heal, we need to ask ourselves, what story do we want to tell about this season? 00:28:56.640 --> 00:29:00.640 Because someday, even the worst season won't be the problem. 00:29:00.720 --> 00:29:02.720 It'll be yesterday's story. 00:29:03.599 --> 00:29:12.960 Whether it's the divorce or the diagnosis or the betrayal or the conflict or the conversation, they'll all just become stories that we tell. 00:29:13.519 --> 00:29:15.599 And so the question isn't whether we'll tell them. 00:29:15.759 --> 00:29:20.640 The question is, who will we become while we're living them? 00:29:21.839 --> 00:29:31.680 Do you want to tell the story of how you finally got even, or do you want to tell the story of how God's grace enabled you to become someone you never could have become on your own? 00:29:31.839 --> 00:29:42.160 Because here's the thing the stories we admire the most when we hear them are almost never written by people who let their strongest emotions inform their biggest regrets. 00:29:42.640 --> 00:29:52.480 They're written by people who trusted Jesus enough to let him write a different ending to their challenging season. 00:29:54.240 --> 00:29:55.119 Here's what I know for sure. 00:29:55.279 --> 00:30:00.720 Sooner or later, every one of us will stand where David stood. 00:30:01.839 --> 00:30:09.200 Hurt, angry, afraid, tempted to take control. 00:30:10.880 --> 00:30:21.519 And when that day comes, I think the hard-won wisdom of David would tell us we need to trust the one who already has our future in his hands. 00:30:22.160 --> 00:30:31.759 Because he loves us and he's for us and he sees things that we can only begin to imagine. 00:30:32.000 --> 00:30:35.680 That, my friends, is some hard-won wisdom. 00:30:36.400 --> 00:30:38.079 And we'll pick it up there next week. 00:30:38.400 --> 00:30:41.680 But for now, I'd love to invite you to stand if you're willing and able. 00:30:41.920 --> 00:30:44.640 And uh I'll close our time in prayer. 00:30:44.799 --> 00:30:56.480 Um, if you're here this morning and life is you're in a season that is just really hard, um, and you'd love to pray with someone before you go, we'll have some friends under the screen to the left who would love to spend some time with you. 00:30:56.640 --> 00:30:58.160 But for the rest of us, let's pray. 00:30:58.319 --> 00:31:06.240 Heavenly Father, we thank you for preserving this incredible story from the life of David. 00:31:06.319 --> 00:31:12.160 And we thank you for Abigail, for her wisdom, for her courage. 00:31:14.240 --> 00:31:21.920 And we thank you for David modeling something that would serve us all so well. 00:31:23.200 --> 00:31:39.680 May we be a people who, when we are tempted to do something that we will later regret, may we be a people who would choose to trust you and to not take matters into our own hands. 00:31:39.839 --> 00:31:47.920 As we do, I pray that we would become more like the people you created us to be, more like your son. 00:31:50.000 --> 00:31:55.200 And it is in his name, the name above all names, the name of Jesus Christ, we pray. 00:31:55.759 --> 00:31:57.680 And everyone said, Amen. 00:31:57.839 --> 00:32:00.720 Grace and priest fans, we'll see you next week.