Anchored In Grace Marriage Podcast
Our vision is to answer God’s call by using our marriage—its experiences, lessons, and redemption—to help couples seek God for true transformation. Through Christ, we stand to reclaim marriages from the enemy, reminding the world that marriage belongs to God, was redeemed by Christ’s sacrifice, and is meant to reflect His love, grace, and covenant faithfulness. We envision marriages elevated, restored, and anchored in God’s truth so they may glorify Him and strengthen families for generations to come.
Anchored In Grace Marriage Podcast
The Foundation of Wisdom and Relationships
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🎙️ NEW EPISODE: The Foundation of Wisdom and Relationships 🎙️
What if the biggest challenge in your relationships isn't communication, compatibility, or even conflict?
What if it all comes down to the foundation?
Join Eric and Sharris on the Anchored in Grace Podcast as we dive deep into one of the most powerful truths in Scripture:
"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom..." — Proverbs 9:10
In this impactful episode, we'll explore: ✨ What the fear of the Lord really means
✨ Why God's wisdom is the blueprint for healthy relationships
✨ How pride, selfishness, and worldly thinking can undermine marriages and families
✨ The connection between honoring God and honoring people
✨ Practical ways to build stronger relationships on a God-centered foundation
Whether you're married, dating, single, or seeking healthier relationships with family and friends, this conversation will challenge you to examine the foundation you're building upon.
Don't settle for relationship advice from a broken world when God has already provided the blueprint for lasting love, peace, wisdom, and understanding.
🎧 Tune in and discover how real wisdom begins when we surrender to the One who designed relationships in the first place.
The Foundation of Wisdom and Relationships A new episode of the Anchored in Grace Podcast with Eric & Sharris.
Because the strongest relationships aren't built on feelings—they're built on God's wisdom.
⚓ Anchored in Grace "The One who anchors you in grace is holding you in His love and peace."
Welcome to the Anchored in Grace podcast. We're so grateful you have joined us today.
SPEAKER_03This is a place where we have real conversations about faith, healing, and relationships, spiritual growth, and learning how to stay anchored in God's grace through every season of your life.
SPEAKER_00Today's episode is called The Foundation of Wisdom and Relationships.
SPEAKER_03We're going to talk about something that affects every single person listening today. How wisdom from God shapes the way we love, communicate, forgive, handle conflict, and build relationships that actually last.
SPEAKER_00Because the truth is, many people know how to fall in love emotionally, but they have never learned to build the relationship spiritually.
SPEAKER_03And without God's wisdom, even strong feelings can collapse under pressure.
SPEAKER_00So today we're asking an important question. Are we building our relationships on emotions, culture, pride, trauma, or selfishness? Or are we building them on God as our foundation?
SPEAKER_03That's good.
SPEAKER_00So Shars, would you like to do the opening prayer?
SPEAKER_03Yes, definitely. So, Father God, we just thank you for this moment. We thank you for every listener tuning in today. Lord, open our hearts, open their hearts, renew our minds, and teach us your vision, your wisdom concerning relationships, marriage, communication, forgiveness, and love. Lord, break down pride, selfishness, bitterness, and unhealthy patterns that keep us from reflecting your character. Help us to understand the real wisdom begins with reverence from you for you. Teach us, Lord, to love people the way you love us. Heal broken places in hearts, homes, marriages, friendships, and families. Let this conversation today bring conviction, healing, restoration, and growth. Holy Spirit, lead this conversation. Let every word glorify you. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.
SPEAKER_00Amen and amen. So in our first section today, why foundation matter? What is a foundation? Think about a house, you know, think about the structure that keeps your house up. That's a foundation, you know. So we're gonna talk about the foundations that God creates for us. So my question to you is would you trust someone to build a house without a blueprint? Would you board an airplane designed by someone who ignored the instructions? Would you allow a surgeon to operate without training? Most people would say, no way.
SPEAKER_03Definitely not, right?
SPEAKER_00Mm-hmm. Definitely not.
SPEAKER_03Because also, whenever something is valuable, fragile, and important, we trust the designer's instructions, right?
SPEAKER_00Yep. We definitely do. And relationships are no different, you know. Yet many people try to build relationships based on feelings, chemistry, attraction, culture, social media, and trauma. And then they wonder why things fall apart under pressure. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that's good. But God already gave us the blueprint. And so in Proverbs 9 and 10, it says, The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy Spirit is understanding.
SPEAKER_00That's so true, Shars. Wisdom does not begin with us. When's the wisdom begins with God? God Almighty.
SPEAKER_03That's right. I love that. But you're so right. You definitely won't trust, you know, go back to your question when you were talking about would you trust anybody to build your home or do a surgery or do anything that re requires like a certification or you know, a special instruction for stability and longevity, right? And we know that we can rely on Proverbs 9 and 10, you know, for that, you know, for that wisdom and that knowledge that we need for a full understanding.
SPEAKER_00So I think that's really good. Hey, but we need to allow God to mold us because He is the potter and He will form us into what we're supposed to be personally and in relationally in our relationship with others.
SPEAKER_03That's right, we're the clay.
SPEAKER_00That's right.
SPEAKER_03So we're gonna move on to segment two, you guys. What does the fear of the Lord mean? The fear of the Lord is not terror of God, it is reverence, honor, respect, or his authority. It is living with awareness that God sees how we love, how we speak, and how we forgive, and how also we treat people.
SPEAKER_00That's very real, Shars. A healthy fear of God changes everything. It changes how a husband speaks to his wife, how a wife responds to her husband, how we handle anger, temptation, hurt, offense, and disappointment.
SPEAKER_01That's so good.
SPEAKER_00You know, and it's it's so real, you know, a healthy fear to know who God is. That's what the fear, a healthy fear of the Lord is. It's not God lording over us, having us in terror. It's knowing, it's us thinking about what we would do if we didn't have God, to be in the place without God. I think about Psalms 91 when it says we're in the shelter of the Almighty. Think about not being in that shelter.
SPEAKER_03That's when you should be afraid. Yeah, oh, for sure. Yeah, that's really good, babe. So also, you know, when the fear of God is absent, like you were saying, pride grows, emotions lead, um, words become weapons, trust breaks, hearts harden, and relationships become self-centered.
SPEAKER_00Amen. But when God becomes the foundation, grace increases, right?
SPEAKER_02Amen.
SPEAKER_00Humility develops, accountability grows, peace has room to live, and forgiveness becomes possible. You know, all those things are possible with the healthy fear.
SPEAKER_01Amen.
SPEAKER_00And here are some supporting scriptures. Some of my favorites, Psalms 20, 127 and 1. Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain. Who built it? Who built it? James 1 and 19. Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anchor. This is a really important one. I think a lot of us can struggle with this one sometimes, right? Because we're not listening. Yeah, you know, this is one for myself that I'm constantly working to be better at, be a better listener, and be slow with my responses because we can act out emotionally before we fully hear something. You know, Ephesians 4 and 29. Do not let any unholiness words unwholesome word proceed from your mouth. Let only such a word as good uh as is good for edification. So the good things that come out of us, out of our mouth, out of our minds, those are things that edify God.
SPEAKER_01Amen.
SPEAKER_00You know, Colossians 3 and 13. Bear with each other and forgive one another. Husband and wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, children, parents, vice versa, whoever you are. Always have a forgiving heart. Always have grace and be willing to share that grace, you know, with others. Don't hold on to anger because imagine God holding on to anger with you. He died for us, right? So there was no anger that he held on to. Uh, 1 Corinthians 13, 4 through 7. Love is patient and love is kind. This is one of the first verses I've ever learned from my mom. And love is all those things.
SPEAKER_03Amen.
SPEAKER_00Right?
SPEAKER_03Good.
SPEAKER_00Every day we endure these things. We got to be patient, we got to be kind. You know.
SPEAKER_03That's all right. Love that. So the next segment we're gonna go into is relationships reveal spiritual conditions.
SPEAKER_00Amen. And one of the deepest truths is this relationships reveal what is really inside of us. Pressure exposes foundations. Pressure, you know, and that's good. And you and it exposes your foundation. Your foundation is what keeps you strong, right? Is your strength, is like the strongest part of you. And when pressure in your life happens, when hard things happen in your life, that foundation is exposed. You're gonna find we're gonna find out who you really are.
SPEAKER_01That's so good.
SPEAKER_00You're gonna learn who you are in difficult moments. That's why your foundation has to be Jesus Christ, you know, and I don't say that lightly. You know, if your foundation is anything else, uh it's gonna crack. You're gonna crack under pressure. We need something that's bigger than ourselves, and that is Jesus Christ.
SPEAKER_03Mm-hmm. That's so good. And you think about too, like I work in the construction field, and um, you know, if you don't build a good foundation, right? Like you said, it eventually is gonna crack. It's gonna be exposed for how it was built, right? Um, if it's operable or non-operable, right? And so, you know, having that foundation that you're laying a structure on that you're building upon. That's our relationship with God, you know. He's laying it down, he's like, I'm here for you. And now let's build upon our relationship that we have together and let's grow because it's only up from here, right?
SPEAKER_00Amen. Yeah, and think about the things that God builds us with. He builds us with his promises, uh-huh, his word, those things that are everlasting, the blood of Jesus. You know, I'm saying we're built, those those are the foundational things that build us in Christ when we accept him in our lives. Yes, but when we don't accept him, what what are we building our foundation with?
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You know, things that are not forever.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Things that can't protect you from the enemy.
SPEAKER_03You know, that's so good. So anybody also, you know, can love when things are easy, but pressure reveals pride, immaturity, control, bitterness, and selfishness.
SPEAKER_00Healthy relationships are not built by perfect people, they are built by people who fear God to repent, grow, forgive, communicate wisely, and love with integrity. You know, and that's what we want to do. See, what Sharius read up there, I thought was really good because these are the conditions of hearts. Hearts can, like it says, the pressure will reveal pride, maturity, maturity, control, bitterness, and selfishness.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00What is the condition of your heart?
SPEAKER_01Right.
SPEAKER_00What are the things that are influencing your heart? We have to watch what we allow in our minds and our hearts.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You know, is it feeding you and fueling you to feel this way? You know, how are you feeling as a person on a daily basis, on a daily basis? You know, we want to make sure, as I read here, a healthy fear. Repent that you're saying, God forgive me, or my spouse, forgive me. You know, it helps you to grow and have a mindset that I want growth to forgive. Um, I forgive you. I'm not gonna hold on to that no more. Communicate wisely, you know.
SPEAKER_03That's really good.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, you want to speak on that?
SPEAKER_03Well, it's just you know, sometimes we can lack our emotions, or our emotions can get in the way of our communication, right? And so we're not communic we're not effectively communicating with our spouse or with our kids or coworker or whoever, right? Because our emotions are in the way, like you said, and that kind of goes back to that pressure, right? You're immature, you're prideful, you're you have bitterness in your heart, all those things, right? And those can affect how you communicate wisely. You're not gonna communicate wisely because if I'm coming from a bitter heart, I'm not I'm just gonna be like, okay, whatever. I'm very short, um, non-responsive, body language is off, like you know, your arms are crossed, and you're just in a closed communicative style of how you're gonna talk to your spouse or whoever, right? So, but I like how you also said love with integrity, you know, like that's beautiful because you know, it all is with communication and um forgiveness and our growth and repentance, all those things are gonna help us mature and grow, grow wisely, amen. Right?
SPEAKER_00Amen. Yeah, amen. And I and and I think one thing that has helped us to tap into that that's important that helped us as individuals and in our relationship, and I think about the book that Tanya, my sister, gave us years ago, it was on the fruit of the spirit. Yeah, you remember that? Oh, yeah, and it was a book that she gave us when we got married, and you know, the fruit of the spirit, Galatians 5, 22 through 23, it's love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
SPEAKER_01Amen.
SPEAKER_00Those are the characteristics of the Lord, and those are the characteristics that we need to have in our foundation. That's right. You know, that's so good. Amen, amen. I love it.
SPEAKER_03So now we're gonna move on to the danger of building without God. So that should be really good. So um, you know, many people also they want, they love without sacrifice, commitment without accountability, intimacy without holiness, and blessings without surrender. But God doesn't bless dysfunction simply because emotions are involved. Do you want to reference a scripture on that, Eric?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, Galatians 6 and 7. God is not mocked for whatever a man sows, this he also reaps.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00So relationships carry consequences. You know, without God, without God, feelings become what? Authority.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Temptation gains power, accountability disappears, and hearts become hardened. You know, there are consequences, you know. And go back to God is not mocked. For whatever a man sows, he will reap.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00I just want you to think about what that is saying. You know, what you give out is what you're gonna get back. So I go back to those fruit of the spirit. Yeah, that needs to be your foundation.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's so good. I love that.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so um, we're gonna talk about integrity in our next segment here. And there's two examples, one with Joseph and one with David. You know, um, the Bible gives us both positive and negative examples of integrity in relationship. And Joseph demonstrated the fear of God in Genesis chapter 39 when tempted by Potiphar's wife. Joseph said, How then can I do this great wickedness and sin against God?
SPEAKER_03You know, yeah, and that's because also, you know, notice Joseph understood sin affects people, but it also affects God. Integrity means honoring God even when nobody is watching.
SPEAKER_00That's right.
SPEAKER_03You know, it's like, you know, when you're a little kid, I can always, you know, think of integrity of as a little kid. Kids know too, even you know, taught or not taught. You know, integrity lives within you, um, regardless of how you're raised. Um, because I remember I think it was our young our um oldest, he was a little kid, and I remember we were in Toys R Us, who all remembers Toys R Us Um, you know, for all of our kids, and he wanted these MMs and he couldn't have them. And we're like, no, you know, he was like what four, probably like four years old. So little, yeah. He was super, he was our only child at the time, and I remember he he took it because he wanted it.
SPEAKER_00Wanted it really bad.
SPEAKER_03He wanted it so bad, and he took it, and we didn't even know he took it, you know, and then he was on the way to the car, and I remember Eric taught him a good lesson in that integrity, even at the age of four. He made him go back and talk to the manager and say, I took these, I'm so sorry. And he and he felt that um uh what do you call it? The uh what's the word I'm looking for? Conviction. Conviction, thank you. I was like lost my word. Um he felt the conviction in his heart, you know, but that's even God seeing and God not, you know, it's like what we just said, integrity means honoring God even when nobody is watching. So being able to think about that, right? And think about the integrity because you're honoring God, regardless if it's good or bad, God sees you, God's watching, you know what I'm saying? And that's what you were talking about, the fear of the Lord. That's right, you know, earlier.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and that that's really good, Charles. I really like that. That's a good that's that's what's really powerful, and it takes me back to Joseph because you know, if you remember Joseph, the the the the young man that wore the coat of many colors when he was young, because of the favor that was in his life. That's right. He was called, right? And um, you know, his brothers didn't think that he deserved that, you know what I'm saying? All the favor. So what did they do? They threw him into a pit, right? And he was sold into slavery, you know what I'm saying? And what we're referencing here about Potiphar's wife was, you know, Joseph was in slavery, and he had to serve in this capacity here, right? And this uh Potiphar's wife wanted Joseph because he was handsome. Yeah, you know, she liked the way he looked, you know, he was built, you know what I'm saying? And she was trying to get him to connect, you know, have sex with her, basically. And Joseph was a man of integrity. I I can't do that, you know. I honor my master that I worked for, you know what I'm saying? I I couldn't do that, that's not right. You know what I'm saying? He had great character, you know. Yeah, so I just kind of wanted to give you guys a backstory on that. Joseph chose obedience over temptation and character over compromise, honor over hidden sin.
SPEAKER_01That's good, you know.
SPEAKER_00So, our next example, what we're gonna say, this is a negative model. We're gonna talk about King David, right? Um, and uh the scripture also gives us warning through the life of King David, right? And King David is one of my favorite people in the Bible. David was called a man after God's own heart, yet David fell when he stopped guarding his heart and surrendered to temptation. So we're gonna go to 2 Samuel 11. David he saw Bathsheba, and that was the wife of Uriah, who was a loyal general who was fighting in a war for King David. And David saw her, she was very beautiful, and she was out taking a bath, like on her terrace, and he could see her, and he gazed on her, and then he gave in to lust and temptation.
SPEAKER_01Right.
SPEAKER_00And instead of turning away, David pursued what did not belong to him. Wow, we do that sometimes. We pursue things that don't belong to us, and he took it.
SPEAKER_03Wow, that's good. And you know, in that whole thing, what started as lust quickly became deception, manipulation, and destruction. Um, David committed adultery with. Bathsheba, then when she became pregnant, David tried to cover the sin instead of confessing it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Who's guilty?
SPEAKER_03Right.
SPEAKER_00We've all have have fallen short like that, you know.
SPEAKER_03Or some people may you may be a David. You might be a Bathsheba, you know. And confession is so um, it's a beautiful thing, you know what I mean? Repentance and confession and also having grace for people with the forgiveness, because it's it's just one of those things. But some of us could have lived this life of adultery, right? Yeah. And of getting somebody else pregnant or whatever, and now you're like, oh my goodness, what are we gonna do now? Now this is real, you know, something that I was done in secret now has come to the light, right?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, you're right about that, baby. And and the real danger for David was the fact that David knew better. Okay, yeah, David knew God very well, right? And David chose to accept sin and to give in to his sin, even knowing the consequences. And when we do that, that is extremely dangerous. You put yourself in an awful situation, right? Because you put yourself in a situation where you're not covered at all, right? Not saying that God won't come and save you from your situation, but you're telling God that satisfying what I want is more important than honoring what I'm supposed to do for you. You know, so David went on, he tried to manipulate Uriah, right? Um, he called Uriah back from the war. He he told Uriah, hey, I want you to come back, come back and enjoy your wife. You've been doing great for me. He wanted him to go and sleep with his wife, you know, and so it would appear that he got her pregnant, right? Covering his sins. But Uriah was such an honorable man, his men were fighting on the line. Uriah said, I'm not gonna enjoy the good things if my men are dying.
SPEAKER_01Right.
SPEAKER_00So he refused to sleep with his wife, refused to be in the same room with his wife, you know, because he wanted to honor what he was doing as a general, you know. So when David failed, he arranged for Uriah to be placed on the front line of the battle so that he would be killed. So another sin. So he he covered a sin by going jumping into another sin, another deception. You know, one compromise led to another, one hidden sin created a greater darkness in David. You know what I mean? And that's the tunnel that we go down sometime trying to hide the deception and the sin, you know?
SPEAKER_03Wow. So this is what also happens when people stop fearing God. Sin never stays isolated, it spreads. Yeah, it affects families, trust, peace, leadership, and generations. And um this kind of reminds me of the movie we watched last night. The secret between us. You guys have to check that out if you have access. I I know it's on Angel Studios, um, but The Secret Between Us, um, so good because it it talks about these things and so much of how how secrets and sin can affect your family, trust, the peace, yeah, the leadership, the generations to come.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And um just when you're when you don't have the we've been talking about the foundation of God in your life. But once you have the foundation, God is still there for you. God's grace and his love is there for you. So definitely check that movie out. It was it was really, really good. Yeah, um, they did a really good job. So, yeah, I just wanted to mention that because that really reminded me of that all wrapped up in one thing there.
SPEAKER_00So, yeah, that's so true. And you know, David's story teaches us something powerful. You can love God and still fall in, you can still fall, right? In your if you stop guarding your integrity, you know, yeah, and that's something to think about. You can be one of the most devoted people, but if you don't guard that integrity, yeah, and that's why it's you know important to every day ask God to just search your heart, as the word says in Psalms, search my heart, God. Yeah, you know, search me every day. Nobody is above temptation, nobody is too spiritual to drift, right?
SPEAKER_01That's good.
SPEAKER_00If we're not guarding our hearts and asking God to search us every day and take out all those bad things, we can become subject to these very things.
SPEAKER_03That's a fact. That is a fact. So um also, you know, David's story also reveal reveals the mercy of God. When David finally repented in Psalms 51, he cried out, Create in me, God, a clean heart. A clean heart. Create in me a clean heart, right? Because he knew who he had to go to to cleanse that heart, to God, to make him whole, right? So David teaches us God can restore broken people, but hidden sin always carries consequences. So I challenge you today, you know, Eric and I both, you know, if you have hidden sin, it's gonna carry consequences. So it's important to just go to God, just like David did, and say, God created me a clean heart. Search my heart, like Eric said, you know, because that is so important because you're not ever going to walk in peace. You're not gonna have that integrity, you're not gonna have the freedom to walk in the purpose that God has for you in your life. So if you have hidden sin today, release it, release it to God because you don't want it to carry on with multiple consequences.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, because you become in danger, you're in danger then of creating generational curses and soul ties that stick to you and pass on to your children. You know, that's right. So you you can create spaces in your relationships that you can never get by. Why why do we never feel like we're happy? Yeah, why do we always have conflicts? Because of soul ties from past relationships are still there, that sin is still there, you know?
SPEAKER_03Yep, that's so good, baby. And if you haven't listened to the soul ties podcast, go back and listen to it because it's so good, and I guarantee you it will free you from some things that you probably haven't even thought about.
SPEAKER_00So set you free.
SPEAKER_03That's right. So we're gonna move on to marriage is spiritual. Who believes that marriage is spiritual? It is. All right, so marriage is not simply emotional, it is spiritual. God cares how spouses speak, how they handle conflict, and how they protect trust, how they honor one another. So yeah, amen.
SPEAKER_00And, you know, in Ephesians 5, you know, one of the greatest chapters in the Bible, in my opinion, it teaches us that marriage reflects Christ and the church. And we've talked about this in so many of our podcasts. Yeah, you know, of the relationship that Jesus Christ has with the church, how that reflects a husband and wife relationship, how we should love, how we should honor one another. You know, this means love should be sacrificial, honor should be mutual, and grace should be consistent.
SPEAKER_01Amen.
SPEAKER_00So here are some questions that I want you to reflect on today. Let's pause and be honest. Do my words toward people reflect God's character?
SPEAKER_03That's good.
SPEAKER_00You know? Do your words reflect God's character?
SPEAKER_03That's really good. And also the other question is am I making relationship decisions from wisdom or emotion? Because you can either I I always look at if you're making a decision from wisdom, you're seeking God, right? But if you're seeking a relationship or doing anything like that based off emotion, making some type of decision based off emotion, it's gonna fail.
SPEAKER_02That's right.
SPEAKER_03You know what I'm saying? It's not gonna be successful, like you're thinking in your mind because we get wrapped up in our emotions. So really think about those two um questions. You know, do you reflect God's character? And then also, am I making relationship decisions from wisdom or emotion?
SPEAKER_00Yep, yep. And have I allowed hurt to harden my heart? So many of us do this, you know, because we hold on to past things. Yep. We never let it go, we never go to God and say, heal my heart, so that I can move forward to where you want me to be and be what you want me to be. Right. We hold on to so many things sometimes and we're broken. And we want so bad to have a healthy relationship with the right person. But when you meet that right person, if you're not healed from the things you've gone through, you're gonna hurt that person.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. You know, hurt people, hurt people.
SPEAKER_00Hurt people can hurt other people. Yeah, don't be a hurt person. No, get healed.
SPEAKER_03Any other question? Do I honor God privately as much as I do publicly? That's a good one.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and and I hope you guys understand what that means. Because that means spending time on your face. On your face, yeah, with God privately, where people don't see you. So many people want to get up in public and hoop and holler and talk about the goodness of the Lord, which is nothing wrong with it. Yeah, but how much time do you spend alone with God? Yeah, honoring God, thanking God for all the great things that He does for you. It should be a daily thing for you.
SPEAKER_01Amen.
SPEAKER_00It should be a walking open prayer with you and God. You having God surrounded in all your decisions, all your thought processes.
SPEAKER_01That's right.
SPEAKER_00You know, he's the foundation of your heart.
SPEAKER_01That's good.
SPEAKER_00Is God truly the foundation of my relationship?
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And I think that's just what we just said there.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You know, God has to be the foundation of your relationship.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00He has to be everything because Jesus is all. You know?
SPEAKER_03That's so good. All right. So we're also going to be talking about practical wisdom for relationships. So, what does wisdom actually look like practically? What it means is pausing before reacting, praying before making an emotional decision, choosing humility over pride, and listening before speaking.
SPEAKER_00That's really good. And I that, like I said, listening before speaking, that's that's the one that I'm working hard on for me personally. I can be transparent and say that. I can suck at that sometimes, but I am, I want to be better at that.
SPEAKER_01Right.
SPEAKER_00And I'm asking God to change my heart and to fix my heart so I can be the best at that. Yes. I want to be better at that than anything else, you know.
SPEAKER_03And I can I can say you're doing really good at that, actually, you know, because I think it, you know, it's hard. And when I think when we like what we said earlier, um communicating effectively, right? I think that's important. Like I communicated, Eric, you're not really a good listener. And you were kind of like, yes, I am, right? But that's it's it's a perception thing, and I I can hear because I'm on this side and you're the person speaking, right? So I thank God just for his transformation and what he's doing in our relationship, because he's he's allowing us to sit in quiet places, right? Where we have to listen to God, you know, and that's so beautiful, and that's what you were saying a couple minutes ago about um honoring God privately as much as you do publicly. Like we can't sit here and do this podcast and not even acknowledge God privately. You know, I'm saying I would be a um hypocrite, you know. I'm saying if we're saying that and then not honoring God privately, because God speaks to us individually and together, you know, and I think it's so beautiful that we do that because it's beautiful, but I can say as your wife that I appreciate you and I love you because you are listening, you are pausing, right? Slow to anger or slow to speak, slow to anger, right? That's what the word says, and you're applying those things to you for the things that you asked for that I want to be better at, right? And I can say you've improved in that, and I really appreciate that because it means a lot.
SPEAKER_00Well, I appreciate that, baby. That's very nice because and I and because it's hard. It's hard when you hear those things from your spectrum. Share us told me that that was really like hard. I spent a lot of time with God on that, you know, in tears and frustration with myself, saying, God, change me. Yeah, you know, because when you hurt people you love by doing an action that that makes them feel small, um, and you realize it, it's either you're gonna change the behavior or you're gonna keep doing the same thing over and over again.
SPEAKER_01Right.
SPEAKER_00So you have to make a conscious decision on what's important, what you want in that moment, or loving them, being sacrificial. That's we we gotta be always have a heart to sacrifice for the ones you love.
SPEAKER_03You know, that's really good.
SPEAKER_00Because what I've learned, wisdom means asking. Does this honor God? Does my actions honor God?
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00Before sending, you know, a text, before making a statement, you know, before doing anything, you know, um, before I speak out in anger, before entertaining temptation, before making relationship decisions. Right. We need to make sure that we are honoring God with what we're doing.
SPEAKER_03Amen. That's so good.
SPEAKER_00And here are some practical applications that you can apply that I think have been really helpful for me and Shars. These are things that we actually do. Rena's not going to tell you things that we don't do, these are things that we do daily.
SPEAKER_03All right, you want me to share them?
SPEAKER_00Please.
SPEAKER_03All right. It says um something that we definitely do is pray together consistently, um, speak life instead of destruction. Apologize quickly. Yes, refuse to weaponize past mistakes, protect emotional safety, staying accountable for each other, um, seek wise counsel, pursue holiness together, and choose forgiveness repeatedly.
SPEAKER_00Amen. That's a fabulous list. And I thank God for those. I thank God. And during the week, here are some things that we want you guys to work on. You know, we can call it homework, you know. I want you to write down what area of your relationship needs God's wisdom the most right now. Okay, write that down.
SPEAKER_03Then ask yourself, am I building this relationship God's way or my own way?
SPEAKER_00That's big. Spend time praying Proverbs 9 and 10 over your relationship this week.
SPEAKER_03And intentionally practice one act of humility: an apology, a conversation, a prayer, a kind word, or even an act of forgiveness.
SPEAKER_00Amen. Amen. So today we learned wisdom begins with God.
SPEAKER_03And healthy relationships are built on reverence for God, not just emotions.
SPEAKER_00We learn the fear of the Lord produces wisdom, humility, integrity, and accountability.
SPEAKER_03Yes, and relationships reveal whether God is truly governing our hearts.
SPEAKER_00Amen. Amen. So in every podcast we do, we always want to give an invitation because you never know if there are new believers or people who want to accept Christ in their life. So if you heard this today and you heard something that is really tugging at your heart and you want a new beginning with Christ, if you're running back to him because you have backslid and you left him, read this invitation with me. You know, and just know that God is with you. You've been trying to build a life and relationship without God as your foundation. The beautiful thing about Jesus is this: He restores broken people, he heals wounded hearts, he forgives sin, he rebuilds lives from the inside out. Romans 10 and 13 says, Whosoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved. Amen. If you want to surrender your life to Jesus today, pray this prayer with us. Lord Jesus, I admit that I need you. Forgive me for my sins. Forgive me for trying to live life my own way. I believe you died for me and rose again. Amen. Come into my heart, change me, and lead me. Teach me your wisdom. Be the foundation of my life and relationship. I surrender myself to you today, Lord, in Jesus' name. And if you prayed that prayer sincerely, we believe God has begun a new work in your life.
SPEAKER_03Yes. Amen.
SPEAKER_00Amen. Amen. Thank you, Jesus.
SPEAKER_03And just remember, real wisdom begins when we surrender to God. And healthy relationships are not built by perfect people, they're built by surrendered people.
SPEAKER_00Amen. I like that. So in closing, Father, thank you for every listener. Yes. Continue teaching us how to love wisely, communicate with grace, and build relationships that honor you, strengthen marriages, heal families, restore trust, God, and give us a heart that reflects your character. Let your wisdom govern every area of our lives. Help us remain humble, teachable, forgiving, and anchored in truth. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.
SPEAKER_03Yes, God. We just thank you for that. Awesome. And um thank you guys so much for listening to our Anchored in Grace podcast with Eric and I. And just remember, together, the one who anchors you in grace is also holding you in his love and his peace. So until next time, we will see you on the next one.
SPEAKER_00We'll see you on the next one. Thank you, and God bless you.
SPEAKER_03All right, God bless you. Have a blessed week.