Sorry to Connecticut and Indiana

This week, the Erins deep dive the most recent episodes of the bi-coastal shows of aging Millennials: In The City and The Valley. They profess their love of Zach Wickham and send their advance apologies to both Connecticut and Indiana. The Erins are excited about Vicki Gunvalson's return to RHOC & manifest Love Island USA crowning #Brinity as the winners.

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:03

Hi, I'm Erin. And I'm Erin. It's time to air it out.

SPEAKER_01 0:17

Welcome to episode three.

SPEAKER_02 0:19

Yay! How was your week? Um, my week was has been really fun and chaotic. We have John's little sister visiting us who is 15 and her 16-year-old friend. So we've just been doing, you know, bopping around Seattle. We also have Felix's first birthday party tomorrow, which I am very underprepared for. So honestly, and John has been on call all week. So I've been in the trenches all week, but it's been a good week. The sun is shining. The weather's been perfect in Seattle. Yeah. How about you? How's your week been? Birthday week, you know. Oh, yes. Birthday twin with my baby.

SPEAKER_01 0:53

Yes. Birthday week. My bestie. Yep. Yeah, you know, had the best day. I did not work because I have a moral obligation to myself to not work that's the way it should be. Started my day with a lovely walk, got my favorite matcha in the city, did some muji consignment shopping, went to drinks with a friend, and then had omakase for dinner. Like literally the best day. Couldn't have been more perfect. And to cap it all off, we'll watched a lot of Bravo. So much Bravo. Should we just get into it? Yep. Let's dive in. We need to start with In the City. Okay, I'm ready. And before we really get into it, pull up my notes. Yes. Notes are required. Yep. Before we get into the meat of this episode, I need to say something from last week's episode that bled into this week's little bit.

SPEAKER_02 1:43

We're mentioning it at all.

SPEAKER_01 1:45

The dress that Danielle wore. To naked any of as I clocked. My brain was short-circuiting. I saw it. I saw it.

SPEAKER_02 1:57

That was an interesting dilemma.

SPEAKER_01 2:00

Tell me what your thoughts are. I who was it that was on Watch What Happens Live after? Georgia? Georgia? Is that her name? Georgina? Sure. It's Lindsay's friend that's not Yvonne. I think her name is Georgia. There's two Georgina. Georgina? Dermatologist. Yes. Okay. I love her. She's one of my favorite. I think she's my favorite of the new, but we're gonna okay. Side note. Too many people on In the City. I can't keep their names straight. She said it on Watch It Happens Live, and I thought this while I was watching the episode. To any any sort of wedding event. This is just my personal opinion. If you have to text the bride or text anyone to ask, is does this dress look too white? I think that's your answer. And why are you texting the bride? We don't need to bother the bride with these things. Yep. Anyway, I just needed to put that out there. Piece of advice for all the ladies or the lads of the world. If you want to wear any sort of fabric outfit to a wedding event, if it's questionable that it could come off as too close to white, too close to white, too hoochy, too short, too low, see-through.

SPEAKER_02 3:11

If you're questioning it, like dress how you would if you want to please your grandma. If you if your grandma had a rule that you had to follow, and that's how you should be dressing and thinking. Yeah. If she if your grandma said don't wear white, you know, that's how we should be thinking. I have some thoughts. Can we can we um can we beat this like death can we beat this horse to death? Um so initially, of course, well, Danielle, I I my first thought was this would be Danielle that does this thing. Absolutely. It's so pick me, it's so Danielle, it's so however upon further reflection, oh no. Uh oh. I think if they were on Judge Judy, slash in you know, any respectful court of law, I do think the facts of the case is that Danielle was in the right. It pains me to say that. However, the court of public opinion, I think she is absolutely wrong. And also she sent that picture in really bright lighting, everything else. Well, like you said, don't ask the bride anything. Ask your friend, ask whoever. And the reason she my theory is the reason she asked the bride is because she knew that she could she would say it's fine because they're not gonna Danielle. I realized, did I mention this before? Okay, no, we didn't talk about Danielle. I I realized what I don't like about Danielle. I've been watching her for years on TV, and there's something that's bothered me about her, and I can't figure it out, and I just figured it out. Danielle is she never is vulnerable actually about her life. She has like this fake manufactured vulnerability about certain things. She's a founder and CEO. Yeah. Of what? She gives me scammer vibes because she is so inauthentic, but then she's so quick to call every single person out. Yeah. She does, she's very envious of anyone who's getting married, whatever. And so she has this fake vulnerability mixed with this, I'm this badass who calls people out thing. And it just doesn't match or make, and there's a lot of like, I think with Danielle, things never make sense with her. Yeah. It didn't make sense why she was upset at Lindsay when Carl and her got engaged. These things don't make sense, and that's what I find bizarre about her. And there's something just really inauthentic. Did she look absolutely gore Gina? Yes. But I and she then she mentioned something about well, I didn't have time to get anything else. Girl.

SPEAKER_01 5:53

You live in New York City. First of all.

SPEAKER_02 5:56

Secondly, look, I didn't even think about that part. You have every store designer, they're used to people coming in last minute, getting tailoring, whatever. That dress was tailored to her. I'm sorry. It was so impeccable. You she did not get that dress off the rack and say, I'm wearing this tomorrow. Acting like that's what happened. It is not what happened.

SPEAKER_03 6:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 6:16

That's that is my opinion.

SPEAKER_01 6:19

Yeah, she has a lack of accountability. She she feigns that she's accountable. Like she'll, but then she'll say stuff, well, I thought I apologized for being a bitch, but and then moves it on. It's like, well, that's you're not actually being accountable. You're just placating to what you think people want you to say, but we can we can see through the cracks there. Like you're not being real, you're not being vulnerable, you're not being genuine. And she always pivots and deflects. Like, yes, she because she never wants the attention or spotlight on her. She'll take something twisted and then redirect it back on a seeming problem that someone else has. Yes, on anything to man.

SPEAKER_02 6:58

Also, can we talk about the fact that this is her biggest crime of it all? She's not funny.

SPEAKER_01 7:04

She she isn't.

SPEAKER_02 7:05

Like at all, actually. And so, and I think she tries to be funny or thinks she's funny. People that are funny can get away with a lot on TV. And since she's not, it's it it's so dry, it just doesn't work. That's my thoughts. Poor Danielle. Yeah, and I can we stay on the wedding for a second. Yeah. Um, what was that fake wedding? What were we doing? I was so confused.

SPEAKER_01 7:29

That is the one aspect that I think is redeeming for Danielle in all of this because it seems like Nick and Yvonne have had multiple celebrations of their union.

SPEAKER_02 7:40

A destination wedding where everyone came and spent money and whatever, and that's not enough for you.

SPEAKER_01 7:46

So, like, I get you wanted to have a nice dinner to celebrate with your friends, that you made it actually official, like, great, but I don't think we needed to be all stuffy about the traditional rules and customary expectations, right, of what a standard wedding is, because please, it was not that.

SPEAKER_02 8:04

No, and also you have happens to be every single person who is filming with you is invited to this wedding, and pretty much no one else, maybe one person in the corner. And that was it. Right. So it was clearly for TV, whatever, and that's fine, but it was so then have a birthday dinner or something. Don't have a wedding dinner or something that's actually important, and talking about how she's a bride, and I can't even if that's how she acted at that little stupid manufactured bullshit dinner. Imagine how she acted at her destination fake sham wedding that they didn't actually get married. Not good, not good. And by the way, why are we waiting this long to sign papers?

SPEAKER_01 8:42

It it's a trend with Bravo folks, isn't it? Because Tommy Tom's non-committal men. Oh yeah. Tom and Katie did the same thing. Now the pump rules, now this. I feel like there's someone else too that I'm not remembering.

SPEAKER_02 8:54

Well, actually, to be fair, John and I um we did mess up our wedding papers and but we tried. And then we realized a year ago that we were um never officially married by the state of Washington because we didn't seriously. We didn't turn in a revised I could be getting these details wrong, but we didn't turn in a revised wedding certif. Like we got there was an air, a typo. The one we turned in, so they came back to us and they said, Oh, you have to resubmit this. We did not resubmit it, thought we did. And then I was looking into um, what was it, renewing my passport or something? And they were like, We don't have a marriage certificate for you. Oh, changing my name. I went in to change my name finally, after you know, two years, what how I don't know how long I've been married.

SPEAKER_01 9:36

And this is crazy. And then I go in there and they're like, we don't have a marriage certificate for you.

SPEAKER_02 9:44

And I said, um, come again. And so yeah, we were not married according to the state of Washington for ever since we were married. I think it was 2023. You do the math, I don't know. And but then they were like, Oh, don't worry, this happens all the time. They were super chill about it, which was weirding me out, and we'll just it'll be retroactive. They backdate, yeah. They backdate the marriage. So now we're married, but apparently unbeknownst to us. So I do understand paperwork things, but this doesn't sound like that. It sounds like, oh, we just never did it to start.

SPEAKER_01 10:18

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 10:19

So as much as I'm calling her out, I'm also calling myself out.

SPEAKER_01 10:23

And that's that's what we call accountability.

SPEAKER_02 10:25

And there's a lot of people on these shows that could use accountability.

SPEAKER_01 10:30

Yes, but if they were all accountable, we wouldn't have shows, I think. Which is the push and pull. So true. Yeah. Um I will say that if I was going on a mini road trip, weekend getaway with my friends, and there was a surprise detour, and that surprise detour was to paint ball in the woods when it was cloudy and rainy and cold, I would not be happy.

SPEAKER_02 11:00

I would be so and I am the type of person who would like paintball. Right. If but I'm also a planner, I need the right shoes, I need the right deodorant, I need the right sunscreen.

SPEAKER_01 11:10

Also, if I'm gonna be putting stuff on my head, I don't want to have spent time on my hair that day.

SPEAKER_02 11:15

A hundred percent. I'm gonna wear a slicked back low bun so that the helmet doesn't mess up my hair. Yeah. Um, also, where was the paint?

SPEAKER_01 11:23

Yeah, I didn't really see them hitting each other much with exploding balls. No, the exploding balls.

SPEAKER_02 11:30

I have to pull up my phone because so I watched this episode last night in the car with the teens and my husband. I was holding up the phone. They are all from Connecticut, okay? So my husband, so this added added flavor to the situation because and I didn't even think of that, which worked out well. And they were laughing so hard, they were thinking, where are they going in Connecticut? Did they know this place? Okay. She said, uh she said, I like that Connecticut is an acute font, like it's a cute place. They're catfishing everyone. Oh, a cute font. Because and I didn't believe John when I first met him. I was like, oh, it's less like you know, people vacation there. Yeah, like quaint. It's quaint. New England. You guys, I've never been to a place where there's less to do. And I'm saying that from a town of 1,500 people, at least in the town I grew up in, there's rivers and lakes and nice places, hikes. There is nothing there. And there is a lot of crappy places in Connecticut. We just don't see it on TV. And so it was so funny being in the car with people from Connecticut. They were cracking up, they're like, Where are they going? And then they were going to this town called Washington. They said, Oh, well, that's kind of a wealthy area. Okay, makes sense. Okay. And then they went to this house that was so big it was the size of a hotel.

SPEAKER_01 13:00

It kind of was giving. What did Giselle call her house on Potomac? She had like a name for it. Oh, the one that was being remodeled? Yeah. It was how her house was like a hodgepodge of structures put together that's where they went in the city was giving.

SPEAKER_02 13:19

Like I was confused. I was thinking, is this a hotel? Is this a a mechanic's office? What are we doing?

SPEAKER_01 13:25

Not good. Not good. Um, it also as they were driving up, definitely gave me Bluestone Manor Berkshire's vibes.

SPEAKER_02 13:34

Because there's I mean, I I really doubt they're going anywhere outside the house this whole week, which is fine with me. I'll stay in I'll make circles around the same little place for days on end.

SPEAKER_01 13:45

But yeah. I also need to make a note of one of the bullet points that I have on my recap document. I think this was when they were packing up to to start their journey. But I say Kyle and Glasses, hot.

SPEAKER_02 13:59

Ooh, I missed Kyle and Glasses. That must have been um I didn't, yeah, I didn't see that. But Kyle is very hot. I'm sorry, and it's it pains me to say that. And and put a man because he's gotten hotter, and that also pains me to say that. Put a man in a slutty little glass. So good. I that will do that doesn't for me. Glasses are great. There's a reason you're wearing them today. Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 14:21

Um, I do think it was sweet of Kenny to offer Nick and Yvonne the primary. Not that that panned out for anyone, but yes. I it was a sweet gesture. And Kenny's starting, I say this very cautiously, starting to grow on me, maybe.

SPEAKER_02 14:41

I'm cautiously optimistic. Yeah. I get nervous about men who, or not, I shouldn't say men, I should say anyone, because this is really a blanket statement. Because he had his meeting with his dad, which was I thought very powerful and interesting and impactful to watch. Loved it. Glad he's reunited. However, I always get really nervous when people who have problematic behavior since you're on Love Island suddenly shift and say, I'm a changed person. I'm you, that was the whole reason because you can only maintain that for a little while. We're talking months at the most. So I'm nervous, and I'm nervous because that's not how the human brain works. It our wiring and our brain chemistry has been created since we were born, and we can change it. Shout out to neuroplasticity, but it takes time when we're little and growing. This is why we learn languages. This is like a side note, but why we learn languages so quickly because we are building hundreds of thousands of new neuropathways a day. When you're an adult, you're only building hundreds a day. So it takes a lot longer to learn things, but you can. So that's why I'm saying that it is physically impossible in the brain for someone like Kenny to just wake up and be a different person. Yeah. Do I believe that this will create character growth and build? Yes, but that's what I'm nervous about. So I'm cautiously optimistic, but I'm like, that makes me nervous.

SPEAKER_01 16:00

Absolutely. Yeah, it was kind of like night and day of how he had been treating not only Whitney up until this point, his partner that he somehow convinced to move across the country for him after dating for only six months, but also the other women in the group, so dismissive and very condescending. And then to switch up like that, again, thought it was very nice to see, but I'm still giving him a side-eye a bit.

SPEAKER_02 16:24

Yeah, we're side-eyeing. We're not there, but I'm open to growth. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:29

Speaking of Whitney, this is the biggest topic that I wanted to talk about discussing in the city. And she's coming in hot. I think you're a perfect person to talk about this with. Okay. Because it is revolving around Whitney's comments about Lindsay. I've always had a single mom card as a single person that doesn't have children, and you as not a single mom, but having a kid. I think In my mind, I'm a single mom who works two jobs, and I'm couldn't be more opposite. And never stops. Yeah, I couldn't be more opposite. Mine is the kid loving. I love the kid, maybe obviously, but um because I do think it is something that I've seen come up not necessarily in pop culture recently, but just in culture in general, about um that the discourse and the the tension between people, millennials that have kids, and then millennials that are choosing intentionally to be child-free, and how in a lot of spaces people with children almost kind of posit that as being kind of of more importance and like their time, their space, their energy is more valuable over and above people that don't have kids. And I don't necessarily think Whitney was wrong in bringing up those things um about Lindsay and Georgina because I think it was weird that they both were like, we're single parents, like we get this room, natural, of course we would get this room. Whereas I don't think that's maybe the most um humble or kind like approach to it. They definitely it definitely seemed like in those conversations, Lindsay was like putting the fact that she was rearing a child, which is incredible, hard, meaningful work. But as someone that doesn't have a kid, it just was interesting to see play out in that dynamic, especially when I don't think Whitney and Lindsay are super close. Maybe if it came from someone else, it would have landed easier, more softer with Whit with um Lindsay. But yeah. What are your thoughts?

SPEAKER_02 18:35

I had a lot of thoughts. John had a lot too, because he was watching as well. He said, I have a kid, but I would never use that as a reason to have a bargaining chip. Oh. But that was interesting because I see both sides. I do see what Whitney was saying because she is saying that yes, Lindsay is a single mom, but she has resources. So kind of saying I'm I think she didn't say it the way that she intended because saying I'm a mom, and and it didn't the thing is, someone without kids, unfortunately, is it's not gonna land well commentating on someone with kids in a show like this, in a situation like this. Unfortunately, even though it's very valid, because the it's going to be weaponized that you don't have kids, right? So there's nowhere that conversation can go because automatically Lindsay's gonna say, Well, she doesn't have kids, she doesn't understand, which is unfair, but is how that conversation's gonna go, unfortunately. And that's not right with Lindsay at the helm of that conversation. Yes. Um, however, we did find out later in the episode, which was one of my notes, that Amanda had spoken to those two in the car and said, You guys should have the primary because your mom's whatever. Which I realized was actually Amanda's effort of making it so that her and Kyle didn't get the primary. She started early that day on her campaign to not sleep in the bed with Kyle.

SPEAKER_01 19:59

I have so many thoughts on Amanda, but she was terrified.

SPEAKER_02 20:03

So that conversation had started, but you know, Lindsay's gonna Lindsay and she's gonna do what she wants, and she wanted that nice room. Also, this house has so many rooms. So why are we even arguing about anything? Um, I think the other side of it is also I understand, I'm sure Lindsay's house is very nice. Her bed's very nice. I have a nice bed and everything, and I am if I was childless and with my friends, I would not care. I would sleep on a couch, anything. So to me, the the mom thing doesn't make sense in this situation. But again, it's like, how many shows are we gonna watch where we have 15 minutes of the storyline talking about rooms?

SPEAKER_01 20:44

That it's so tiring. I that is the exact thought that was flashing in my head. I was like, I thought arguing over rooms was reserved for housewives, specifically Ramona and Sonia on New York. Like we do not need this bleeding to all the other shows.

SPEAKER_02 21:00

Also, I appreciate your perspective as a single woman without a child because I think that oftentimes anyone who's single or anyone who doesn't have a child, they in a situation like that, if you're traveling with people, if you're whatever, oh well, give them the nicer seat on the plane, give them whatever. And it's like, why can't you have a nice room? Why do you have the the the twin over here? It's not fair. And I I always tried, uh like you know, back when I before I had a baby and I actually went on trips like this with friends, I always tried to be the person that didn't do that, even though I was in a couple, as they say on Love Island, because it's not fair, yeah. And they're sharing, it's not like Lindsay's saying, Okay, I want this all to myself. They're sharing still. Yeah, so I get that part, but the mom aspect is like iffy to me. I think Whitney, what she was saying didn't land well, but I do understand. I think the thing Lindsay's very privileged, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:56

The thing that Lindsay said that got me really Really aggravated was when she goes, What does she have to be tired about? Pilates as if being a person without children means there's nothing that can stress you, nothing that can wear you down or tire you out, that you have no cares in the world. I'm like, girl, come on. We saw how stressful your life was pre-Gemma. And she seems so much happier now.

SPEAKER_02 22:24

Yeah. So and I am uh I have a very privileged life at this stage. I am a mom. I do not work, and my life is not that hard. Okay. And I understand everyone's perspective is different. I also have a partner, but the privilege of it all and the resources help so much. And you just have to acknowledge that my experience is so much different than some of my friends. And when we're comparing notes of parenting, who are who are struggling with money, who are struggling with their partner who sucks or whatever. Like I have a good situation, and I think Lindsay's setup is good. She doesn't have a partner, and that's that is hard. But I do think her setup is good. And I think we have to acknowledge how different parenting can be from one end to the other. And I think that's what Whitney was trying to say, but it really wasn't the right context. It's not gonna land well. It has to be said, yeah. She should have pulled an Amanda and put it in someone else's ear who had a baby.

SPEAKER_01 23:23

I also think Whitney, she started, she was on some season of The Bachelor, I believe. Um, but she hasn't done this full reality TV game for a while. So I think this was the episode that she talked the most, or at least in the edit, she had the most to say. Um, so I think she's still figuring out how to navigate the camera, like bringing up these thoughts and feelings and emotions to people on camera. So I was excited to see her have words and thoughts. Yes, me too. So I think it will she'll continue to get better, which is exciting this way.

SPEAKER_02 23:59

I think so too. And also she's so pretty. Oh, yeah. So I'm here for it because I, you know, I'm like, wow, your face is so symmetrical. And sometimes when she's just not talking, I can just stare at the symmetry of her face, and I'm good with that.

SPEAKER_01 24:11

We love symmetry. So something kind of related, but not completely on the child single people topic was just how Lindsay was navigating this conversation in general. She made a comment of she doesn't have the energy to fight about this, meaning the child conversation. Yeah, she's fighting about it. But every new person that she sees, she brings it up to. And then when Whitney comes in the room, she's like, Do you want to have a conversation? It's like, Lindsay, please, we can see right what you're doing. And also, she was acting very much the way she was acting in the season of Summer House when her and Carl got engaged toward Danielle, where Lindsay, and this is very classic Lindsay, has her point of view, her boundaries, thinks that those are correct, and is so inflexible to being open or hearing other people's opinions or perspectives that it's really off-putting to me personally because I feel like throughout the seasons of Summer House, we've seen her talk about how she's in therapy and working on herself and evolving. And you could please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong. You're in school to become a therapist. Not a therapist, but you know, we're working on it. But that is not the point of therapy. The point of therapy is not to learn solely to learn how to establish firm boundaries and not let anyone penetrate them. Like that is not how you move through life. And I don't think that's a telltale sign of someone being mature and evolved because that's so unrealistic. Like you can't force those upon everyone and think that everyone is going to be okay with your view and perspective of the world. And I just see that I saw that coming out again in this tissue if you will. Um, and I hadn't seen that that harshness from Lindsay in a minute. So it was kind of jarring. I was like, oh, here she is. Actually, I had the exact same thought.

SPEAKER_02 26:14

I was I was thinking this is kind of giving vintage Lindsay. Yeah. Um, I will transparently say, and I know we're all on the Lindsay train these days, and so am I. Yeah. However, I think having a baby really changed her and changed it. It developed a new sense of it helped her heal her issues that she has with attachment wounds. And this was a throwback to before, but transparently, I did not like Lindsay, actively dislike her, and I will stand on that in the first at least three, four seasons. Of Summer House? Yes, same, absolutely. Because, well, looking back, I'm like, well, she did make great TV. So I should that's a that's a lens that I see differently now. But these were the examples of the things where it was odd, completely inflexible, weird, random things like these random hills that she was gonna die on for what? And it's always with women. Yeah. Yes. Never with men. Yes. With men, she will let them just walk all over her. How many sandwiches have you made for me? Yeah, of course. I mean, love that she would get in arguments with men, but it was never that this type of thing. So that was that's my grievance. And I love Lindsay and I love her growth, and I love seeing that, and I enjoy her mom era.

SPEAKER_01 27:33

Yeah, yeah. And I think um something to summarize this point is in the conversation that she had with Yvonne for them to kind of smooth over the the argument that they had about how Lindsay showed up at her fake wedding dinner. Um, but Yvonne said something to the effect of that friendship, in friendship, you're supposed to be able to come to each other and talk about things that are bothering you and be open and honest about that. Um, to me, Lindsay doesn't always seem like a safe space to do that for her friends because she is so inflexible um and gets immediately defensive. Um, but I am glad ultimately that they were able to, from their perspectives, resolve it, move on with their friendship. And I guess I think they're still fine. I feel yeah, like I've seen them post recently on social media together, so that feels good. Because I'm always sad on these shows when people come on having these decade-long friendships and then the cameras, the reality TV of it all cause a rift. I think I don't actually like that.

SPEAKER_02 28:34

I agree, I agree. I don't think that will happen because Lindsay's so seasoned, or I'm hopeful that that won't happen because she sees through it and she still is friends with people that she's gone through so much with on the cast. So I I do think she has like an understanding that of what's needed for reality TV and then how we can separate that from real life a little bit. Totally.

SPEAKER_01 28:54

Um, moving on to the dinner, tail end of the episode. Just a general question. Does Gavin have a point on this show aside from wearing overalls with a tank top and having a bald head at the end of the table? And being the spoon that serves the pot. Like, does what is I think, yeah. That is like Gavin.

SPEAKER_02 29:16

Because he never talks about himself. I know nothing about you. Everyone's only friends. I I think they're originally only friends because he owns a bar and gives them free drinks. He's like you know what it is? Here's Gavin, okay? Not that I've um ever done a drug before. Sorry, mom. Um Gavin is Gavin is um when you're in college and you need something like, you know, a person may need something like mushrooms or weed or whatever, and then you have to kind of have the person come over that is the dealer, and you have to feign this friendship for like 30 minutes to 90 minutes, and you have to watch, you know, maybe you'll watch a little bit of a um, you know, a little bit of roadhouse or something like that, and a movie, you put it on, and that's what Gavin is, and you he serves a purpose and you have to sort of have him along for the ride.

SPEAKER_01 30:11

This totally makes sense, yeah. Um, but yet again, he brought up Kyle being a DJ, and it we were rehashing this fight yet again. I am so over this Kyle being a DJ conversation. I'm so over it because it's so irrelevant to what's going on. Summarize this in in only a few bullet points. It does not appear that Kyle is communicating well with Amanda about his journey to signing with the manager and scheduling all these gigs. But on the flip side, I don't think that even if he was being super commun communicative with Amanda, that she would be hearing him. She would be being like, okay, yeah, but she wouldn't understand why he's doing it, even though I feel like it's very obvious them, both them as a couple, but also Lover Boy was in financial stress, so he was doing this as a way to supplement that. Um, and she wouldn't not not only understand, but she wouldn't accept it. She would, she would, she just hears DJ, him being out late. No, she doesn't want it. And I'm like, girl, you're an adult, you have to live and ground yourself in the facts and the reality of the situation. But as we, you know, have seen over the last several months, that does not seem to be something she tends to do.

SPEAKER_02 31:32

No, yeah, and she won't say how she feels instead of saying, I don't want to share bed with you, Kyle, I want my own room, I am not there right now. She has this whole plot from the beginning of the of the episode to get the moms to have the primary, and she's talking to the drug dealer guy about like you, I'll take the she was so excited to take the kid room because she knew that her and Kyle could share the kid room. Oh my god, we ended up in this kid room. How did this happen? How did it happen? It's like if you don't want to be with this man because he's a DJ, totally get it, totally fine. That's how it was with my ex. He was out all the time, he was a bartender. I hated it, I hate that lifestyle. I understand. End it.

SPEAKER_01 32:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 32:16

She's at the she wants everyone. The thing about Amanda and Kyle is they want, they don't want to say what they want. They want the other person to break up with them. Yeah. And because they don't want to be the bad person. They don't want to be the bad person. And so they're doing these crazy things. Like Kyle's living this whole DJ life because he whatever, and Amanda's moving out, but they don't want to be the person that says this is not working.

SPEAKER_01 32:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 32:37

I do now.

SPEAKER_01 32:41

Anger and violence are not acceptable. Not that Kyle was violent in this argument. Um, but I understand why he gets escalated so easily. First of all, they've been drinking, so I think we can all say that Kyle is more easily escalated when there's alcohol floating. Obviously. Um, but yeah, it's like beating that dead horse. You I if I was him, I would think I was going insane. Like we're talking about this yet again, all the same stuff. And I do think it gets to a point where this should not continually be a topic of conversation with everyone. Yeah. Like, why was when they're all together, they always bring this up? I it it would be really, really frustrating.

SPEAKER_02 33:25

It would be really frustrating. And Amanda did say it well that this is his only outlet that he has is the drinking and the anger. And I do believe that's true. Yeah. I believe that they're both very extremely avoidant to an extreme level, and that Amanda's only outlet for her emotions is to put her words in other people's mouths, and his only outlet is his drunken anger. Doesn't make it acceptable, but it's it okay, the pattern continues, we see. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:57

Thank God they're no longer together because Thank God.

SPEAKER_02 34:00

It just was not the right pairing. I really I am very hopeful for Kyle right now, which I never thought these words would come out of my mouth. I think there's just in general, like where he is right now in life. We're talking real time, not when the val even this, I do think he's going, I'm hopeful that he is going to come out of the other side of this.

SPEAKER_01 34:22

I do well, he's making out with fans at every DJ gig. Have you not seen this? And I take back what I just said. And he's been spotted with Sally from Southern Charm multiple times. Also Sally. Ava good old Sally. Ava Dash from Next Gen was that's right, spotted with him in the Hamptons.

SPEAKER_02 34:46

Like he's out in these streets, which Well, we don't we can never forget about Megan King Edmonds and her watershoes and his tippies. His tippy, tippy toes. And she was looking like she was wearing watershoes.

SPEAKER_01 34:58

So Kyle, I think maybe okay. You don't have to take back having hope for him because he's single. I'm just gonna say, I have a I have hope for him. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 35:07

Will that hope be easily diminished? Probably. We will see.

SPEAKER_01 35:14

We'll see. And with that, I think we can put a pin on in the city. Yep. Can't wait to see how the rest of this trip unfolds. There's only one more episode. Can't wait to see the nothing that they do in Connecticut.

SPEAKER_02 35:26

There is no way they're gonna do an activity because there's nothing to do. They did paintballing as an activity.

SPEAKER_01 35:31

We're gonna have to get um Stephanie's takes on next week's next week's episode. Yes, we will. Yeah, love it. All right. Transition to our other show of aging millennials on the other coast, the valley.

SPEAKER_02 35:46

Um same premise, completely different show.

SPEAKER_01 35:49

I have to say. Oh, we're airing it out that Zach's injury of getting whacked in the head with a street sign, him forcing everyone to still go to the club while he goes to the emergency room, and then him coming back with the bandage around his face and having to continue to wear that for the rest of the trip. I think is the single funniest subplot of 2026, bar none. And maybe even I'm not gonna say maybe a long time.

SPEAKER_02 36:23

Because there were so many details. I wrote down some of these. There were so many details that was so funny about everything.

SPEAKER_01 36:36

Um He goes, My face is that and he is so vain, but he is upfront about it.

SPEAKER_02 36:49

He's so vain, he's so upfront about it, but he also doesn't care at the same time. Exactly. I for and I have to say I love Benji. Yes, they're so I love and I love how through all of his craziness, Benji is just supporting him. And I think as a person who is kind of a loud, fun person, like funny and kind of whatever person myself, I have been with people in the past who've stifled that. Yeah. And I love that Benji is just kind of like, here you go, do your thing, and we love it. And and I and it's so nice to have to just witness that. That's my man. And and he's not trying to control him and say, say this, do this. He's just like there to, you know, put the towel on his head. I'm gonna, I'm gonna put in an I'm gonna put, I'm gonna clip in um an image on this video of Zach because the funniest thing was him sitting on the bus with like six random towels on his head, blood everywhere, and he's yelling at everyone. And he goes, you're bleeding. Yeah. And he goes to everyone, you are not my friend if you don't go out. And I will say, I don't drink anymore. Okay. But Zach is me while drunk. Okay. I promise you. I that whole scenario of getting injured, yelling at everyone, coming back from the hospital in the bandage. I promise on my life, my friends can like from that era, can that was me coded 100%. And I love that. But he was it did it funnier, obviously. Okay, so I had a f I have a few notes here. Um, Zach makes a comment because they're driving around to the club and he says, Um, is that the hospital next to the club? That's super convenient.

SPEAKER_01 38:21

As if they deal with these sort of injuries all the time.

SPEAKER_02 38:26

Yes. And then he goes up to the hospital and he's like twerking, going up there, and he said, I wonder if they'll give me a brand deal. And then he said, he's up front about what he wants. And then he immediately says, This happens when I dance. Granted, I wasn't dancing, I was just wiping bird shit off myself.

SPEAKER_01 38:44

This man.

SPEAKER_02 38:46

Yeah. This man is so funny. And then him in the captain's hat the next day on the boat with the bandage is amazing. And it's kind of giving um what's the ED? Oh my god, what's the movie with Drew Barrymore with the Kennedy woman? Um Grey Gardens.

SPEAKER_01 39:06

He was giving me a LA Gay Grey Gardens. If you haven't watched Grey Gardens, the original and the scripted, it's really good. You have to. It's really good. It's something.

SPEAKER_02 39:18

It's something. That's what he looked like. Yes. And I agree with you, and just every minute of that 10-minute, it was so funny. And him coming back to the club with the bandage on, drinking his Diet Coke is amazing. And I love Zach, and I've said it from the minute I met.

SPEAKER_01 39:38

He's the best part of the valley.

SPEAKER_02 39:39

I love him. He is TV gold, he is a star, he is everything. He is light, he can be dark, he can get down with the deep conversations, he can get down with the plot, but he can also move past us. Yes, and he can go get a butt facial, he can go get scroll talks, he can do whatever with these people. And I I just have this is my Zach appreciation, and he's so funny.

SPEAKER_01 40:04

Zach Wickham. I think I believe that's your last name. We love you at Iron It Out, okay? We are big fans. And if you ever hear this podcast, please come to Seattle and join us. Please. Please. Oh my god. Um this we definitely got into it last week. Um my hatred of Danny is on it has reached the peak of Everest. First of all, this isn't even that that serious, but I I know there's no coming back from something with me when the smallest, innocuous things give me the ick. When he was pounding his chest the morning of the birth his birthday saying, It's my birthday, and the constant let's go, he reminds me of a frat boy at a Christian university. Like this is a like he he's a 20, he's a 22-year-old young life leader at at college.

SPEAKER_02 41:12

100%. 100%. My favorite thing is that in on his birthday with the let's go, he just could only talk in that way, and then Michelle at the very end of the night tries to have a serious conversation and he says let's go as if it's his new language. He was like, Let's go.

SPEAKER_01 41:28

Like sad. And also, did was I mishearing things that his birthday was also his anniversary with Nia? Yeah, and that says a lot. Why? Like you Because he's a narcissist, you actively choose when you get married. Yeah. God, this man. And then him joking about, oh, he hasn't been snipped yet, so birthday celebration, let's have another kid. My god, Nia, you're not going to run, but I beg of you to please run.

SPEAKER_02 41:59

I have some psychological notes on Danny's.

SPEAKER_01 42:03

Please share them with the class.

SPEAKER_02 42:05

And every single man in that show, except for Zach and except for Jason, and who else? Benji is accepted. Who else is not in that manosphere circle? Is that it?

SPEAKER_01 42:16

Yeah, I mean, I think that's it because then we have Jesse, Luke, Danny, Tom. Tom is like whatever. Tom is fair. Does not need to be on the show. Sorry, Schwartzy, but you're not really doing it.

SPEAKER_02 42:30

I do think he has some comedic value.

SPEAKER_01 42:34

Yeah, but I don't think enough to justify a full-time cast member.

SPEAKER_02 42:38

I he he he is problematic in his acceptance of people's really problematic behavior. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 42:47

And I also And justification of it.

SPEAKER_02 42:49

And he doesn't, and he gets away with it because of it's like, oh yeah. Right. But he supports very problematic behavior. Okay. Danny, every man on this show, minus the ones named, um, is one hop, skip, jump, whisper, one toot, one queef away from full Andrew Tate, Manosphere, gone wrong. Yeah. I guarantee if one of them spends too long on their TikTok algorithm, yeah, they're done. Algorithm will get them. It's done. Danny is very scary to me. I think Danny, similar to Jack's, has potential to be extremely abusive. We have we are we don't know, I can't say, but we're seeing emotional abuse. There is no, it is clinically defined by what Danny is saying. There's manipulation, there's putting Nia down. And now we have what's going on where Nia's response to keep the peace to whatever is to fawn, and she's doubling down because. His behavior is becoming worse and worse. So therefore her for, and he's becoming more and more triggered by little things that she has to increase her response. And this level of the birthday where she is truly treating him, and it's not a metaphor, she is actually treating him like a toddler, having a tantrum, and she is desperate for him to not she said, Why don't you walk away? These people suck. The reason she's saying that is because she is, she would rather put her own self under the bus than to have because she knows that she'll just look like a bitch. She knows that he is capable of saying the craziest, worst things ever. And she her beh her response to me, and it's not against her because I think she's a victim in the situation. Of course, any dynamic is a two-way street, she is a victim. And so she is having a trauma response, and her trauma response is to fawn and freeze and make sure everything's okay because it was so extreme in this episode. Her response. I feel so much for Nia. I feel like her life is very, very, very, very, very stressful. I feel that she is surviving and she is living day to day. And that's why she says things like, I just want to have a good day or a good birthday or whatever. And I think we're seeing the either beginning, middle, whatever of very, I mean, clinically, we're looking at this, it's emotional abuse. We don't know what else is going on, but this is what we see on camera. So this is what we see on camera, and it took a few years for it to really come out. I'm very scared for her and her family and what is behind the scenes. And I understand why she's staying, because a lot of times, unfortunately, people will stay with their partner because they don't want them to be around kids by themselves. Because what happens then? You have custody, they have custody, the kids are with days on end with this person that you don't trust with them. So that's that's like I I think of myself, and you know, as a parent, you're kind of going, okay, well, I'll take it because you don't want your kids to have to go, even though there it's a lose-lose, and I'm sure the kids would rather have you guys divorced and be happier. As a childhood of divorce, yes, absolutely. Yes. However, when we're when we bring abuse and neglect and whatever into the situation, that conversation changes because it becomes survival for you and your kids. Unfortunately, of course, when parents argue and whatever, they you want them to not argue, you want them to be part. You can a lot of kids are much happier with their parents divorced. Yeah. But if we bring abuse in, okay, so now Danny is alone with the kids, what does that mean? Does it mean they're not gonna eat? Does it mean they're he's gonna say nasty things to them? And she can't be around to control and monitor like she's doing in this show, and that's what I have to say. So as much as I want Nia to be empowered to leave this man, I understand why she's not.

SPEAKER_01 47:05

Totally. Like you could see so plain as day how she was trying to keep the lid on his behavior so tight. And I think when her and Danny were walking away, or she was walking away, and Danny was alone at the bar, it flashed to Janet and Jasmine and maybe someone else sitting on a couch, and one of them made a comment like, she's doing this because she's nervous about what he's he's gonna say. Like they are all calling it like they see it. Um, and it was just so indicative that after Nia went away and and Kristen went to go comfort her, the only thing that Danny could focus on was the fact that his birthday was ruined. Like they did this, other people didn't, and he wasn't concerned at all about that. His wife, the mother of his four children, walked away crying. Yeah, he's so solely focused on himself, and I don't know, like obviously a trait of that a person having that trait is off-putting in general, but knowing that he's a parent, yep, is sad and scary in a lot of ways, too.

SPEAKER_02 48:15

Yep, and I showed I showed John out of context the scene a few episodes of a go, and he he doesn't watch the valley with me. I showed him just the scene of Danny and Nia at dinner with the baby, and Danny kind of going, uh Nia, she threw up on me, and I said, What do you think about this? And John was like, This man doesn't know how to take care of his kids. He didn't know that he had four kids, and afterwards I told him this guy's four kids. He's like, What? He doesn't even know how to take care of one baby, baby number four.

SPEAKER_01 48:39

Yeah. So yeah. I think I I'm gonna say something, but I'm not. This is not me trying to give Danny credit. So I'm gonna try to frame it in. Everyone has good qualities, okay? Even serial killers, some of them are hot. The most important quality, arguably. Um I understand sometimes why Danny gets confused about what people's problems are with him. Because he's not the one necessarily engaging in these conversations about what the actual issue is. It's Nia oftentimes being the voice, like when Nia was with earlier in the season, had the conversation with Kristen and Zach. Um, and then when Nia was at, you know, the lunch in Mexico, people aren't saying that it's Danny's drinking that's inherently the problem. It's how he acts, behaves, and treats other people when he is drunk or when he has had too much. And I think there's a miscommunication when Nia is relaying that back to Danny. She really only focuses on they don't want you drinking. And then she overindexes on, well, Brittany and Zach and Jasmine, they drink too much too. We all get messy when they're drunk. Well, that's not being truthful, that's actually being dishonest because that's not the intent of what these people are trying to say. It's how he acts when he's drinking. Like other people aren't inappropriately touching other people in a group when they're drunk. Other people aren't yelling and demeaning women and their partners when they're drunk. So I think that's point number one. And then point number two is then when Danny is hearing this from Nia, when he is sober, he has tried on a couple occasions to go to the group and be like, I heard this. Like, what do you think about it? And then actually, no one is being honest with him except for Janet. So I cannot believe these words are about to come out of my mouth. I feel sorry for Janet. Let me say that again. I feel sorry for Janet. If you saw me six months ago or showed me that that quote to myself six months ago, I we I wouldn't have believed you. But we are changed. We are changing, we are evolving. Um, but I don't think that anyone is actually telling that to Danny's face aside from Janet, because then when he asks, when they were all on the lawn chairs in Mexico, they're like, no, drink, we don't care that you drink. But they didn't close the loop. And it's like, come on, guys. Like you say you care about Janet. When you're with her, you all have the same very strong opinions. And then they all, when they have these conversations with Danny, they're all like, Yeah, but a lot of people have these thoughts. You are the people that have these thoughts.

SPEAKER_02 51:27

Like, we I understand from your own perspective. This is how I feel. Lala does do that. She, yes, Lala.

SPEAKER_01 51:35

And again, another thing that I cannot believe I'm gonna utter from my lips is I'm loving Lauren from Utah on this season. Me too. Love when she puts that scarf on her head, yes, you know things are about to go down. Yes. Um love her. Love that she her the support that she's had for Janet through this episode, especially with the vulnerability that Janet showed. Um, and I think it explains a lot of how Janet has approached approached this situation with Danny. Yes, for sure. Anyway, those are my thoughts. What do you have to say in response?

SPEAKER_02 52:11

Well, I agree with with what you're saying, and I think also to add to that, I think I see the reasons why people aren't being as forthcoming as La La is or whatever. Because in order to well, as a person who used to drink too much, it you can't have a conversation because they're they're worried that they are going to be called out for their drinking, which they are. Yeah. And they all of them party, they drink, whatever. That's their life, that's their choice. They don't have problematic behavior, but that's why anyone who is indulging too much in a behavior and feels insecure about it is going to worry about that behavior being called out on them. So that's why they're focused so much on the behavior. It's fine, it's not the drinking. No, no, no, it's not the drinking. Oh my God. But Lala is like, it is the drinking. And it is. She has because she doesn't have anything to hide.

SPEAKER_01 53:06

And she has the firsthand experience of being a sober person for seven years. She's like, I can see this for what it is, it can call it out plainly.

SPEAKER_02 53:13

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So I think there's that element. Um, the other element is in Nia's case, I think she probably maybe has said that in the past in close. It is not safe for her to say that because we've seen that anytime Nia, because Danny already blames everything on everyone else. He he deflects every single thing. It's everyone else's fault. Everything he does, everything he says is somebody else's fault constantly. So it's not um, because I think Nia, it's not safe for her to actually say how she feels. Totally. I think it's like, oh, the other people, the other people do this, the other people think this. It's not me, but it's the other people, and they, you know, I I think that's what it is. Is that it's just because it's not safe. And the other people know what happened to Janet when she was. That's when my my senses started to come out for Danny was when I saw him on Watch What Happens Live last season saying something about how Janet was toxic, and this is before we saw the season, whatever. And I'm thinking, huh, that's weird that he's saying that. Why is it's almost it felt to me like I got a little sense of he's trying to disparage her character so that whatever she says on the season coming up, people dislike. Yeah. And he was successful in that. Sure was, swindled me. I think we all got a little swindled on that one. I mean, Janet's biggest grievance to me is the spaghetti in a bag. All the Janet, I've been like neutral. I've been like, I don't really get it. Sometimes she annoys me, I guess. When I saw that spaghetti in the bag earlier this season, and it's plopped down on the table, like you don't need steaming up in there. You don't need to bring in anything.

SPEAKER_01 54:48

That's when I knew things were wrong. Keep that in your own pantry. I don't I don't need it if that's what you're gonna give to me. Also, spaghetti? Who brings spaghetti to someone? Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 55:01

Yeah, those noodles are gonna get soggy. Spaghetti is a kid food. What adult eats spaghetti that's not like, oh, I'm eating mac and cheese in front of the TV vibe?

SPEAKER_01 55:11

I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 55:12

Sorry if we have any spaghetti lovers. I'm not sorry, you need to pick a better pasta. Pick a better pasta. A bucottini. A reggaetoni.

SPEAKER_01 55:23

I love a bucottini. A ravioli. Ravioli. I a tortellini. Spaghetti? Well, I mean, it's classic.

SPEAKER_02 55:31

It's classic because it sucks and American taste sucks. You're disparaging all of Italy. Are you not? I just have a feeling Italian people aren't out here eating like Janet spaghetti. We need Andrea on the podcast. I know. Okay, spaghetti expert or sorry, pasta experts sound off. I took a pasta class once by a real Italian woman, downtown Seattle. So I feel like um A real Italian woman. A real authentic Italian person. And so I'm an expert. There we go. Um she said nothing of spaghetti in the pasta class. It wasn't even mentioned. Okay, well, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 56:07

I'm my mind has been blown up. Spaghetti gate. Spaghetti gate. Um, we focused a lot on Danny being a dark and sinister person, but I think we need to give some of that energy to Luke as well. Oh, I have a note on Luke here. I I don't have a lot to say aside from the overarching fact of again, it's all he's following an in Danny's shadow of wanting everything to be about him and his feelings, not realizing that Kristen is very obviously going through postpartum depression, postpartum anxiety, and not he doesn't seem to clock and acknowledge and get that this is temporary, this is a phase. Like, she is what is Kaya, their daughter, like three months old at this time. I would imagine that still you're in the thick of it. So new going through the trenches. Like, lay off her my God. I want to again don't condone violence, but this man is so unbelievable.

SPEAKER_02 57:13

Yeah, and he's being gassed up by these other toxic men. Jesse, the worst. We'll save that note for later. Um, my note on Luke is I was really nervous when he said to Kristen something he's kind of mentioning on this episode, well, there won't be a wedding, blah, blah, blah. And he said, and I quote, they need to get back to being in love, kissing, etc., to think about getting married. And that is a threat. And it's a nice looking threat because he's saying it in a nice tone and he's saying it in this way that's oh, he just cares about the relationship. But that is a threat. Kristen is going through a mental health crisis.

SPEAKER_01 57:54

Literally, she's talking about how she's seeing a psychiatrist, she's very open about her mental health crisis, which is good because a lot of times when new moms are experiencing those things, they have shame or they feel like this means that I don't love my baby, so they don't talk about it. So the fact that she's feels like she can be vulnerable about it, I think speaks a lot about her as a person, and the fact that he can't see that and respect that just makes me even more frustrated. For sure.

SPEAKER_02 58:21

I think I don't think he's so far gone like Danny is. Yes. I think he's a hop and a skip. I think that's why Kristen is aligning so much with Danny and Nia because Luke is, and Kristen is man-centered, unfortunately. He is unfortunately, Kristen is man-centered and she is very insecure and has a very anxious attachment style, and so she will do what he says.

SPEAKER_03 58:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 58:44

And that is unfortunate about our girl Kristen, because I do really like her and I think she has a lot of good qualities. The other thing is he is with Kristen. She is a main character energy, okay? She is a chaotic person. She has grown a lot. I like her a lot. She's a fun person, she's funny. She that is the energy you're gonna get being with her. So being upset about that energy is annoying. However, Kristen's gonna Kristen. So if she's going through a mental health crisis, I'm sure she is really mean to Luke. I'm sure she does criticize his parenting and choices he's making about small things, and that will wear on anyone, man, woman, whatever. However, these comments about we need to get back to making to being in love, kissing, which subtext was being sexual, is because that's all he can think about. All he can think about. These comments, that's what I get nervous of. I think he's truthful in saying that she disparages him or like is critical of him. I think it's true. I I think that she says mean things, she says things she doesn't mean, sh I think that is true. I just think saying saying about the kissing and the affection and all of that is where I get nervous.

SPEAKER_01 59:56

Yeah, and he said something that I wrote down verbatim because that it that made me sit up like a board.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:03

Well, because he says little comments that you they they pass you by, and then it's like, oh, these are actually really problematic.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:09

This was in one of the kind of side interviews that he was doing, but he says, Maybe this was harsh enough to get Chris Kristen's attention. I'm like, you want to get your fiance, mother of your child, who's going through a mental health episode attention by intentionally being harsh and threatening her. Red flag city. Yeah, horrible.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:35

Oh my god. Um I would not be surprised if he becomes Danny in a few years because him saying, Oh, I I want to go out or whatever, oh, I've only done it four times. This baby's only four months old. So you've gone out four times and drank so much that you slept on the couch and blacked out four times when you that's once a month. That is a lot. I'm sorry, do not get it twisted, listener.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:01

That is a lot, yeah. And I I don't think Kristen's being unreasonable in that because it doesn't seem like she's saying you can't ever go out with your friends or like have a boys' night. She's just asking when you you can go out, but go out and be able to come back and still help me parent because I'm solo parenting by myself when you're out, and then if you come back blacked out, I'm still by myself.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:25

And in the morning, you're hung over and you're on the couch. No, it's and and when you're that new and it's four months in, you're up every couple hours. You're doing it's it's a 24-hour job, and you need your partner to be on point. And if you can't stop blacking out drunk and you're craving it so much when your baby's that young, that is an issue. Yeah, and you might have a problem with alcohol.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:49

I really had a lot of hope for Luke because he is from the Midwest. Yeah, I'm from the Midwest, just have an automatic camaraderie. I still have some hope for him. But then I realized he's from Indiana. Okay, tell me what that means. If any of you are from Indiana, first of all, I'm sorry. But it is an objective fact of Midwesterners that Indiana's the worst one. Okay. And that's all I'm gonna say because I don't want to sound off in the comments, Midwesterners.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:25

Do we agree? Do we disagree? Um, this is similar to so we have the whole nation being represented in my home because we have people staying with us from Connecticut. My husband's from Connecticut. So what you're saying is Indiana is the New Jersey of Connecticut. That feels accurate because that's what everyone says in the East Coast or in New England about New Jersey. Yeah. It's like the armpit, everybody knows it sucks. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:47

Yeah, sorry to Indiana.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:48

See, I'm learning geography. Um, anything else do you have to say about the valley? Oh, I do have to say, um, if we're are we comparing the two, the city and the valley?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:00

Yeah, I think it's an interesting comparison because, like I said, it's both are about a friend group of aging millennials on different coasts. Yes. And each show gives vastly different energy.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:10

Very very different. I will say, I know the popular opinion is to say the valley sucks, it's horrible. I disagree. I actually think that it's bringing up really interesting topics. It as much as these people are problematic, I think problematic people should be on TV because then we have conversations about them. Yeah. Because then we talk about what it means as a society, as reality TV watchers. I don't want to see the problematic behavior. It hurts me to see, but this is real life. This people do this. I like how people say this person shouldn't be on the show. This what and acting like their life is perfect, and everyone in their life. No, we all have people, we all have a Danny, we all have a Luke, we all have a Jesse somewhere in our life. And it's like, I think it's valuable to talk about those things, and that's what's different than the city. I love in the city, I love New York, I love seeing the scenery, I love seeing their jobs, but it's not a deep show. And and maybe it will be, it's not. It's like job, restaurant, whatever, and that's fun, and that's kind of the classic reality TV formula. I'm actually enjoying how the valley is very messy and it is very, very, very, very dark. Yeah. I think it's valuable, and I know that's and that's how I feel about Mormon wives too. It's like dark and valuable. Mom talk. Mom talk. And I don't know. I'm I it's this is what happens to people who are partying and whatever, and they do it for too long in their life.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:37

I think it's an interesting juxtaposition because when I was thinking about what do I have to say about comparing and contrasting these two, my immediate thought was the cast on In the City seems to have their lives just so much more put together. Yes. And in the Valley, they do not. But I think to your point, part of why I maybe think that is because the Valley, they're they're going there, they're being real, they're not hiding all of these messy and dark dynamics that are going on within their their partnerships, but within the friend group at large. And on the in the city, we are still like surface level, right? And I think part of that is because it's they're in their first season. Most of the cast on In the City hasn't done reality TV before. The big players on in um on in the valley? That's not the valley. The valley, not in the valley. I've been I've been mashing their names. The bulk of names suck, so it does it's interchangeable. The big players on the valley have been doing this game for a lot longer, and they've been also around the camera. So, like, yeah, obviously, Janet, Jesse, what like all of them haven't been main characters, but they have done cameos on Vanderpump Rules before in the past. So, you know, they They're familiar with that life. Um and also I think something that is interesting when we were talking about um the conversation with single people versus people with children about in the city. I think maybe and I don't have really any basis to believe this, just aside from aesthetics and what I see, but I do think that the folks that have children on in the city seem to be in a much more secure financial position than the parents on in on the valley. 100% Kristen and Luke, they seem to have a great life, but it does not seem to be as well. That's also my question. What has he ever done for work? Do we know anything about his life? Like a fishing guide in Colorado, maybe. I plucked that from I don't know what corner, dusty corner of my brain. So if that's wrong, sorry. Um, and then Danny and Nia, they had dusty corner of your brain. A lot of dusty corners of my brain. Um Danny and Nia had to move to Santa Clarita to get a bigger house for all their children. They have four children. For them to isolate her against and they have four children, so obviously that stretches them more financially. And so, yeah, I think it it is a different version and different flavor of that stage in life. But I do appreciate how the folks on the valley don't hide or sugarcoat things for the cameras. Like they're they're like, this, this is who we are, and take it or leave it. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:32

And I think I I agree, and I'm hopeful that over time in the city, as these people get more seasoned, as we get more seasons in there, that we are gonna get that more vulnerable side. But I'm enjoying watching it. I love how it's kind of that glossy, fun. They're in great outfits, they're glossy's a good word. Yes, yes. One's a dermatologist, one they have real careers, completely different shows. In the valley, we're going to these chain restaurants, Jax's. I've been there. It's no more though, so sorry. Oh no. Wait, I did know this. You told me this, but you've been to Jax's?

SPEAKER_01 1:08:13

Yeah, met Jax. Okay. I'll I'll text you the pictures I have and yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:19

We'll talk we'll talk about this um at a at some point, but I'm going to need a full I need a review of Jax's episode idea is having an episode where we talk about the Bravo products and places that we have been. The list is extensive, people.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:36

That would be a great episode. All right. Well, moving along. Um being cognizant of time here. Yeah, we can. You have a baby to watch. Um this Erin, regrettably, has made a horrible mistake in that she did not watch the premiere, the season 20 premiere of Real Housewives of Orange County.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:56

Horrible.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:57

I'll give my emphasis on horror. I didn't say it. Um my general thoughts are that I am excited for Vicky to be back. I don't I think a lot of people have problems with her because who we know she is off the show, which is fair and justified. I personally don't hold my housewives as a moral compass or pillar of my life. Or anyone on these shows. Because let's be honest, if I did, I couldn't be fans of the vast majority of them because they do not politically, nothing, ethically, morally align with how I view my life and the world and want to live. Um I all but even with that, I always I can't get it out of my head how much she loves Mexico. And especially in this episode, she was talking about needing a resident permit and and resident card, and she couldn't leave Mexico to come back to the US because then she couldn't go back. And I'm just like, this is just so interesting knowing who she sports supports politically. Um again, that's just an aside.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:09

But I overall Well, she likes the white people things of Mexico, right? She likes what Mexico and Mexican people can give to her. Absolutely. She's she what can you give to me?

SPEAKER_01 1:10:19

Yeah, she loves a beach and tequila and andlays. Yes. But overall, I'm glad that she's back. Just the hijinks that her and Shannon get up to when they're together, like falling over because they're 60-year-old women trying to walk on sand. I don't know. It's just funny too. I love Shannon Storm's Bador. Yeah. And I'm ready for her to be back on my screen. Yeah. But I think overall, they didn't really get into the meat in this episode. Not that any show ever does the first episode of the season. So you'll be caught up by next week. Um, but I think it'll be interesting to see how Tamara has evolved or not evolved because there's still a tiff between Tamara and Shannon. They're both not over it. I need them to move it along. I cannot keep harping on this for a third season. No. Um, so please, ladies, please do your job. Keep it moving. Keep it moving. Um, but also last thing on um Orange County before we get into Love Island, rest in peace, Archie. I was sad to hear about that. That's sweet, sweet. And he made some great cameos in this episode because he was still with us. And we knew what he meant to Shannon so much. So that's Orange County, really abbreviated, but we'll dive in more. It was the first episode. We can't, yeah, you can never say too much. Yeah. Good thing I didn't watch it. Yeah, you didn't miss a ton, but she'll she'll do her homework next time. She better at least.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:35

Oh, I I'm on it. Love Island. First of all, can I can I start off with a bang? I know nobody clocked this because it was very quick, but I sure did. And I'm gonna put a clip of it on the screen. Parmida's toenails. They're so long. You noticed the toenails.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:58

Well, I was here. We were watching it together. That was when we were upstairs. Oh my god, I forgot that you were here and I made us rewind.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:04

I was like, wait. They were so long, they were so square. They were French and acrylic. French and acrylic, and I would like everyone to know, and I'm proud to say this, I ended up loving Parmita.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:16

Yeah, I think at the end, her and Corbin made so much sense. They have the same two brain cells, they're on the same wavelength, they care about how they look and how hot they are as a joint venture. And that's it, and that's fine. They have a joint bank account already, and it's their hotness.

unknown 1:12:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:39

And I was sad that they left that episode because I would have absolutely chosen other couples over them to leave. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:48

I would love to see Parmita on a different reality show or more of her because I think she's so funny, so hilarious, so out there. She's so gorgeous.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:58

In ways, the fact that she, you know, is who she is, unabashedly.

SPEAKER_02 1:13:05

But she's very kind in the end of the day, and that's what balances it out. Yeah. I loved her. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:11

Um, Family Day. We need a reality show around Bryce's grandma. She was a star. That woman telling production to get her son, her grandson to the hideaway. Yes. Because it's going against nature. How long they haven't been physical. I you can't love her.

SPEAKER_02 1:13:37

You can't script this. You really can't. She was a star. A star. An absolute. I could have watched a whole episode with just her. Yes. And just her chatting with everyone. I need the raw footage of that. Like, please give us the behind the scenes. Everything.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:48

Yeah. Maybe they will. They better. Um, but I think the thing that mostly we need to highlight about Family Day was Melanie and Sincere and their families and how they responded to it.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:02

It was bad. It was all bad.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:06

I was that Sincere's dad or stepdad. Unclear, but that man wasn't really paying attention to Love Island. He was half watching it. He was in the middle of doing his hair, and he saw how his son was treating Melanie and said, I have to hop on a plane to Fiji immediately to correct the situation because this is not okay. One of my coworkers described um his dad. You know the movie Matilda? Of course. Oh my god. The dad? Danny DeVito?

SPEAKER_02 1:14:41

The fiber's fused to the head. Every time I hear the word fiber, I think of that.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:51

That's what I'm saying. That's when he says it.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:52

You're such a baby. Stop it. Fiber is a fuse to the head. Fiber is a fuse? What is that supposed to mean?

SPEAKER_01 1:15:00

And yeah, that's that's what he seemed like a great, great human. Oh, he looked exactly like him. But that that was the vibe. The fiber was fused to the head. Um But he was so embarrassed and ashamed of his son's behavior, rightly so. But you could just when the camera was panning on Sincere when his dad and his brother were saying, You don't move like that, this is not right. There's a time to to put an end to things, you could just tell that it was going in one ear and out the other. Yep. Sincere did not give a shit because at the end of the day, which we saw, he knew Melanie was gonna come back to him. Yeah. And I'm so makes me so sad for her because I think that just speaks to unfortunately, maybe her self-esteem, how she views herself, that she thinks that this is acceptable for her to put up with. And it's not, girl. It's not, you deserve so much better. It's bad.

SPEAKER_02 1:15:59

I loved, loved, loved the dad. I thought he was doing such a good job as a parent, being honest, but saying it with love and being supportive and being hopeful of his growth and setting a standard for his child. I thought the way he said it, he didn't mince his words, he didn't sugarcoat things. And I really liked how he centered on, he didn't center on you're gonna fix this. He centered on you need to repair her feelings, you need to repair with the women. Um, that's what he centered on, which I loved. And I I thought the dad did an amazing job. And that's a really good example of parenting honestly and setting a boundary, but also saying, I'm here for you. And I I I thought it was perfect.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:16:44

Like I really enjoyed watching him. I said, because we were watching with the teens, and they were like, Oh, he's Melanie's not. I said, Melanie's gonna be with him. Yep. I knew it because here's my problem. The reason I knew that is because she said, Oh, my mom will like him. So it's a generational pattern. Melanie has entered delusion land because the reason I know that is because at the end of all of this, her takeaway is my mom was fine, my sister was not. The mom was not fine. She was not supposed the mom was not supportive, she just what she was in the back seat a little bit more. But Melody's takeaway was my mom was fine. And she also said you need to repair with my mom. So she has this idea that her mom is gonna be okay, and that's what makes it normal because probably she's seen these dynamics play out, and that I think Melody Melanie? Melanie Oh my god. I I thought I heard you say that. Um we've been absent. Speaking of delusion, by the way, we started filming at 7 or we got here at 7:30 a.m. Okay, it's now 9 30. Yeah, exactly. Melody, Melanie, whoever you are, Melanie, um, Melanie's, she is delusional. She's actually entering delusion, and I'm very worried for her because when it's an Amanda Batullah situation, when you enter that delusion, it does not matter who says it, it does not matter what is said, you are gone. Another example also of sincere of a man, as we spoke about earlier in this episode, saying, I'm a changed person, I'm gonna do better. He's been doing you that's not how it works.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:20

Yeah, he's I think a lot of something that has been happening in life and culture the past maybe five years, post-COVID world, um, when people our age are going to therapy, is we are over indexing on therapy speech. Yep. And talking like we know what these things mean and overusing terms and inappropriately assigning terminology to people, action, actions, whatnot. I think one of those things that has been historically over the past few years overused is love bombing. Yes. Like I think us women it's the tick to TikToki. Yeah. Yes. Um, we I think in a lot of ways are good in the fact that we are being able to stand up for ourselves more often and not accept certain behavior. But I think sometimes there's an overcorrection where any display of a man showing attention or affection or a respectful love or appreciation, when it's a newer relationship, it automatically gets labeled as love bombing, and you need to look out for that, and that's a red flag. It's not always the case. I think, again, that's overused. The word narcissist as well. We'll put that in there. Narcissist too. I think Sincere is a class A love bomber. Like in that conversation he had with Melanie, where he was like, I want you to be my fiance, I want you to be my wife, I want you to be the mother of my children. And even she was like, Whoa, those are big words. And then post their family's visiting, when they had one of their first conversations, he was like, I'm gonna change everything because he wants to do this, he wants to be with her. I'm like, You exactly like you said, you can't flip on a a dime like that. Like, this is not who you've been for weeks, and so now you're saying all these things. He knows what words to say, he knows what her triggers are that are positive, that he can push them, and that's going to make her feel like he's closer to her. And it is like scary and creepy to watch.

SPEAKER_02 1:20:30

Oh, it's scary and creepy to watch. He has everyone in that villa under his spell.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:35

And I am so glad that Anaya's family told her, like, girl, what are you doing? You are not being honest and truthful with her. Like, you see what this man is doing. You need to be honest with your friend if you say you're as close as her to her as you claim. And I'm I'm really glad that they called her out on that because that was one of my biggest frustrations the other week. I was like, stop lying to your friend, like, be honest, be that that friend that's giving you that hard, tough love, and be like, you don't deserve this. This is what this person's doing to you.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:05

Yeah. I think Sincere is a mastermind in what he does. I think he has a lot of people manipulated. I think that's why he can he got away with movie night with everyone being so disturbed with how he acted. And now after all that because they were old clips. Yeah, they were old clips. Mind you, they were like four days old. Right. Okay. What I said five minutes ago is old in that case. But I think Sincere is I I get really scared of their dynamic because um sincere melody. We gotta end it, folks. Melanese is going in everything that happens that's good between them. She is so attached to it. Yeah. The dance, him getting her things, whatever. And they're all things that actually you don't they have no bearing on someone's honesty and their ability to be a good partner. And so she's doing the classic thing of an abuse dynamic, not saying this is abusive right now, or it it might never become that, but it's the push-pull, it's the dopamine of getting one little scrap of something. Oh my god, we had such a good connection. Oh my god, the dancing, the she did one karaoke song, and it's because you're always searching for that connection. Oh my god, it's here, we're finally, we're changed, we're gonna be okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:28

It makes me sad. Yeah. And I think one of the things why Sincere has everyone in the villa under her under his spell is because he's also lying to them. Yes, and he's doing the same thing to every single person. Hard, I think, for them. It's frustrating when they all then see it playing as day on movie night and can't clock, be like, oh, maybe he's not being honest to me. Because after him and Melanie had that first conversation post their families, where I don't think it was a good positive conversation, you can really tell that Melanie was impacted by what his family was saying to him and her sister. Sincere, after him he finishes up chatting with Melanie, goes to chat with Bryce, and Sincere says that they are in a good spot and it's going to be a crazy love story for sure. Like, of kind of a of course, then people are like, okay, like you are making moves. Melanie wants to move beyond this because this is what Sincere is saying, but that is absolutely not how I would have summarized his conversation.

SPEAKER_02 1:23:33

Absolutely not. Absolutely not. Also, he said something um to the effect of he was so motivated. Motivation is my fuel. Okay, but fuel is the same thing as motivation. So what are you you're talking like a seventh grader? This man loves words. He loves an analogy, he loves words because they help him disconnect from his emotions. Um he I I need everyone to come closer. Okay? Zoom in. Zoom in, listen. I need the young people. Speaking of which.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:08

I heard come closer.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:14

She's ready. What's going on?

unknown 1:24:17

We're stalking.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:19

Oh, I love that. Actually, we're almost done. Yeah, yeah. Like probably like two or three minutes. I was just gonna do a PSA. I was just gonna do a PSA to the young people. Do you want to hear it? I'm gonna put it to the camera. Yeah, sit down. Live studio audience. Yeah, live we have we have a live studio audience, and she is a very lovely young woman who is the younger uh I almost said daughter. Nothing. We thought of her like that. The younger 15-year-old sibling of my husband, her name is Stephanie, she's the best. Um, I'm saying it to you, and I'm saying it to the ladies, I'm saying it to the gentleman, I'm saying it to everyone, to the world. Connection means nothing. It actually means nothing. And here's why you need a connection in a you need shared hobbies or shared humor. Connection means absolutely nothing because if nothing else is there, connection means nothing. How many relationships, and myself included, have we been through and done and whatever, where oh my god, we have such a good connection. Yeah, we have such a good what does that mean? I can connect what does it mean?

SPEAKER_01 1:25:21

I can connect with a waiter at a restaurant, like one vibe, but you that doesn't mean anything unless you grow and foster it. Yes, and they're not doing any of that.

SPEAKER_02 1:25:29

So yeah, I'm sure they have a great connection. That is not I I see the connection. I it's not it's it's palpable to everyone. They have shared humor, they have a shared vibe. That literally is it. That means nothing, absolutely nothing in anything. You need the other things first, and then you can build a connection. But we need to stop as a society, as America, we need to unite as America, we America, we need to unite the nation against Sincere. Against Sincere, first of all. I think the unit is united in that. Connection, we need to take this away, kids. Connection means nothing. Connection means nothing. Zero. If you have a nice personality like Melody Melanie and Sincere have, you will connect with a lot of people. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:24

I have connected with many people. It's the fact that you can some people have the skill of small talk. Yes. And you can connect with anyone if you can have small talk. Yes. Because you will find those connection points. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:26:36

Especially if that person's attractive and you're attracted to them. We need to get over that word. Yeah. It means nothing. It's like air. Yeah, of course you need connection in a relationship. You also need the person to like be employed and be responsible and be trustworthy. And I'm saying this as a person who's dated people mostly without those qualities, particularly the employment factor.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:00

I love an unemployed man. Minus we're changed.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:04

Yeah. We're grown. Um this episode will come out after the finale has already aired. Yes. So we'll circle back to how it ends. But it I think we all know how it's gonna end. Bryce and Trinity? It has to. I would accept and I and Carl. Yeah. But it's I will accept. But if it's not Bryce and Trinity, what are what have we done the last six weeks, you know?

SPEAKER_02 1:27:25

Well, like my husband said last night, this country has voted for people and who are very problematic. So you know what?

SPEAKER_01 1:27:33

So true. America doesn't surprise me.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:36

So America doesn't surprise me. Who is in office right now is a testament to the fact that Melanie and Sincere could win.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:44

And they even made it to the final. I would have taken Kenzie and Dylan over them, honestly.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:49

And that's I would have taken Kenzie with her little mouth open 24-7 over that. Yeah. Anyway. We really got into it today. We've been yapping for almost two hours. You know what? That's okay. I love a long podcast episode. And our listeners will love it too because we are some long-winded girls, and I'm sure we'll attract long-winded girls. Long-winded girls rise up. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:15

Still we rise! Still we rise. Still we rise. Oh, that's perfect.

SPEAKER_02 1:28:19

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 1:28:20

CTT girls listening to you.

SPEAKER_02 1:28:22

Yeah, and we have the Connecticut baddies with us. The Connecticut baddies had their lovely Connecticut commentary about the city last night.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:29

Yeah, love it.

SPEAKER_02 1:28:30

Yep. All right. Well, cheers. Cheers.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:33

Episode three. Episode three.