Rev. Carolyn Reed

Carolyn Reed began her ministry with the Indiana Region on May 10, 1999. Her work is focused on relationship building among pastors and congregations throughout the region. This ministry includes Search and Call and designing a variety of congregational transformation and conversation processes.

Carolyn also gives support to the Commission on Ministry.

Carolyn has a B.A. from The University of Indianapolis and a M.Div. from Christian Theological Seminary. She and her husband, Bill, have two adult sons, Ryan and Zachary.

Transcript

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SPEAKER_00 0:03

Let us tell you a story. A story that will transform, enlighten, challenge, and change how we see the world. My name is Kyle Brown. And I'm Danny Goulden.

SPEAKER_01 0:14

And we'd like to welcome you to Sacred Sit Downs.

SPEAKER_00 0:16

A conversational podcast that explores how the Spirit of God moves within this world through the power of story.

SPEAKER_01 0:24

In today's episode, we will sit down with a member or friend of Geist Christian Church as they share their dynamic, faith-filled story.

SPEAKER_00 0:31

We hope you will be enlightened and inspired by the word shared today. This is Sacred Sit Downs.

SPEAKER_01 0:42

Well, welcome everybody. It is a new year for the podcast. It is a new year for us. It is 2023. Danny, how are you? I'm doing well. How are you doing? I tell you what, it is uh a good year. We already started off with uh Troy. It was so good to hear his story uh a couple of weeks ago. And this week we have another wonderful guest, uh somewhat a friend, but also a member and also a former employee of Geist Christian Church. Uh today, Carolyn Reed is with us. Carolyn is uh an associate regional minister for, shall I dare say, the best region in the discipledom, uh the Indiana region.

SPEAKER_02 1:20

I I think that's a fair, fair assessment.

SPEAKER_01 1:23

Well, I mean, you know what? If you have any questions, just email us and and let us know your thoughts on that. And uh maybe we'll share the email later. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 1:30

But do you realize if we are in a different polity, Carolyn would kind of be our boss?

SPEAKER_01 1:34

Uh yeah. Yeah, we would have to call you uh How would you like to supervise us?

SPEAKER_02 1:38

I would not like to be the boss of you two.

SPEAKER_00 1:40

Thank you. Well, yes, that's a thankless job. Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:43

It is it is a uh very much a thankless job.

SPEAKER_00 1:46

Thankfully, we're all colleagues in ministry, though, and that's a good thing. Right. It's a good thing. Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:51

It is. So uh Carolyn, uh we we like to call you Reverend, and so I'm kind of curious right off the bat. Um, you know, one of the things that we don't always ask, but today uh we thought it would be good to begin with uh your call story. Well, how did you become Reverend Carolyn Reed?

SPEAKER_02 2:08

Sure. The long version.

SPEAKER_01 2:10

Uh you can give me any you can give me any version you want today.

SPEAKER_00 2:12

You're our guest. You do you whatever, whatever you'd like.

SPEAKER_02 2:16

I would say I was born into the church, uh, always had a part in my life, um, and uh grew up in the United Methodist Church when I was young. That's where my parents were members. We went to a country church uh where the pastor and his wife, two uh young persons at that time in their lives, as well as my parents, were friends, and so ministry always felt welcoming and warm, was kind of my early image of that. And when we moved later uh at another Methodist church, the pastor there was a very kind uh older man. And I when I was about 12 and at that point going through confirmation classes with the Methodist Church, I'd been baptized earlier. I had thought at that time when I was kind of discerning what might be ahead, there were two things. I thought I'd like to be either a firefighter or a minister. And at that time in the world, I did not have female role models. I had not seen any females in either of those jobs at that point. And so I thought, well, I'll set that aside. I don't think I can do that, even though those two things are kind of in my heart. So went on uh to college. What I really wanted to do by the time I uh got to Purdue University, the first year I was in college, spent one year there. And I thought I wanted to be a meteorologist on TV. That's I loved weather, still love weather. Uh however, chemistry class was a stumbling block to that career goal. And Purdue itself was not my fit after coming from a small town. So I transferred to a United Methodist College, although by that time I was disciples of Christ, and uh was really nurtured by my home pastor who kept saying to me, You've got these gifts, let's try this. When you're home this weekend, how about you do some liturgy and worship, or how about you help me lead the youth group, or giving me experiences and opportunities where I could kind of try it out and encouraged me from an early age, I was very shy. I couldn't imagine talking in front of people, but it felt like connecting with that earlier self uh when I was twelve, and thought, well, this male minister sees this in me and thinks it's okay if I'm a minister. So I kept nurturing that and had opportunities along the way to think this is where I belong.

SPEAKER_01 4:48

So what does it mean uh someone saw something within you? What does it mean to be seen for you? What what was that experience like and and and uh what is the power you find within seeing others or being seen from from that experience?

SPEAKER_02 5:05

I think um because I've always held things fairly close inside of me and not a uh big share necessarily of feelings, for this person um to see who I was, to see the gifts I had without me being um in your face about those things, and to know, oh yeah, I do have that inside of me. I am a compassionate person, I can be kind, I like working with youth uh at that point in my life. Um those kinds of gifts, and the more I had opportunities to lead in worship, that was an opportunity where he would give me that opportunity to say, Well, let's try this. And I enjoyed it, I loved it. I loved um writing liturgy, still do. Uh so I think just having someone see who you are and see the gifts in you and to say, you need to think about this was really helpful for me. And as you might imagine, remain close to him because he was one of those just special people in my life.

SPEAKER_00 6:09

Absolutely. So you you said that at some point you found your way to the disciples of Christ. How did you find your way uh to the disciples of Christ and what led to that change?

SPEAKER_02 6:19

It's a love story uh I'd love to share. So in high school, I dated for a couple of years uh a young man who lived in Indianapolis. I lived outside of Indianapolis, about an hour away. And uh we had met at this retreat and uh we started dating, and he was a member of Disciples of Christ Church in Indianapolis. And so often my grandmother, who I would stay with, who lived in Indianapolis, not very far from him, conveniently, um, I would be in town on a weekend and go to church with him. So I was nurtured by that congregation as well, kind of in a different way. I was nurtured into the disciples. In the small town where I lived with my family, there was a disciples' church and it's a smaller community. So a lot of friends I went to high school with also went to that disciples' congregation. I was already friends with them. So once that relationship ended, I say I got custody of the disciples because he then moved in a different direction in his life denominationally. Um and it was just a wonderful fit. The side story is there was some um congregational conflict in my Methodist congregation at that time, and it was hard for me to engage with the minister at that point, and I was becoming increasingly uh nurtured by this other minister I'd mentioned earlier. And I liked a lot of the ideology. It felt like a better fit for me than the Methodist Church did. My family remains Methodist. Um, but for for me, the disciples just felt like a good fit. And so that's how I became disciples of Christ.

SPEAKER_00 8:01

Well I'm glad you met him and dated, and love's a powerful evangelism tool. So I'm I'm glad you found your way here.

SPEAKER_02 8:06

It can be, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:08

So you um, you know, one of the things I take for granted is uh my entire time growing up, I have always seen male leadership within the church. I mean there were some female elders or deacons, but I and I never thought twice about not having an associate or a senior lead pastor in that role. It's something I take for granted. You mentioned that early on in your life you didn't see yourself or someone who looked like you in the pulpit and leading and facilitating and preaching. And so you thought to yourself, maybe I can't do this. Do you remember the first person you saw uh in the pulpit or in that role that maybe you already you already knew this is what I'm going to do, but it just it it it galvanized solidified your this I can do this. I I see this person doing it.

SPEAKER_02 9:04

I think for me it was probably when I was in seminary and uh Reverend Claudia Grant, who was a big name in the disciples and till her death not that long ago, um she was already in a pastorate at that point. And I c just came to know her through the region and regional events, and I just saw how strong she was, both in her faith, but also in her leadership and how the congregation she was serving at that time loved her. And then of course she later moved into uh general church work, uh international church work. And so that was probably one of the early persons I remember. It was that generation of women right before me that really began, I think, to kind of pave away. Uh we we of course have always had women clergy, but not that we saw very often until a later time. So it really was Claudia Grant, Sylvia Mill, persons like that in my life that I saw serving the church and thought, okay, this is good. But it was more in the disciples. I did not see that as much with the United Methodists at that time, which we know has also changed.

SPEAKER_00 10:14

You have such a unique role in ministry, I think, serving in regional ministry across Indiana. And so we have three for those who are not disciple, we have three manifestations of the church or general church or regional church, and then the local, the congregation. And so uh the region is sort of in the middle of those two. And so here in Indiana, we obviously have uh you get to see churches that are urban, suburban, uh, rural, town seat, uh, a lot of different characteristics among those churches. So what, Kieran, in your ministry with the region, what have you observed as the connecting thread among those churches? What keeps us connected and in relationship with one another?

SPEAKER_02 10:56

The connected and relationship are the key words, I think, for regional ministry, and something I have always kind of strived to help create where I've served. And I think that's because that's the only power, as uh some people will know, we don't have a lot of authority in the disciples' congregation congregations and the regional work and general work. And the only power in a good way that I think we have is through relationships. And so that networking and connection, I think, is what builds the body of Christ. Even if persons are different than us, can we find ways to minister together? Can two disciples' congregations come together in the community where they are or in close communities and figure out a way to serve uh others in the name of Christ? And I I strongly believe in relationships and in relationship building, and for me, that's the focus of my ministry within the region of Indiana is how to help us understand one another, because you're right. I think there are often a lot of differences between rural and urban or small town congregations, and how do we bridge those gaps? And they're not always easily bridged. Um so to say in one place, well, this other congregation I know of has done this. Maybe, you know, this is not the exact thing you need to do, but take a risk, or talk to them and ask them how they created this ministry. And so to try to b bridge those um gaps across congregation kinds um and help them to build relationships between themselves. I always say it's not about me, it's about bringing other entities together.

SPEAKER_01 12:41

So um you know, one of the questions that we often will ask is what about your faith journey has given you pause or has challenged you and and and serving as regional uh in a regional capacity, serving in a local church, uh doing uh a variety of things uh throughout that that calling, what what has uh been uh difficult or challenging or given you pause?

SPEAKER_02 13:09

I just said today to my colleague after getting off a really hard phone call with one of our clergy that's life is unraveling in in lots of ways. And I said, this is the part of my calling in this position that I'm feel like I'm both good at and is also really, really hard. And it's to walk with people in pain, I think. Whether I did that, uh I served congregations for 15 years before coming to this position, and I think it uh it was what I loved and what was probably the most challenging. Um partly maybe because of my personality and how I tend to uh take on some of that pain. Um But I think walking with people in difficult times is so critical uh but often really challenging.

SPEAKER_00 14:00

I think that's uh uh many of our most all of our regional ministers I've encountered do it really well, but it it's the walking with clergy. Often clergy, especially in some settings, are really on an island and alone and really have no one to turn to. And I've heard uh several of Carolyn's colleagues use the term pastor to pastors, and I think that's um very true statement. I I'm interested, this is gonna be uh a controversial question. Okay. I want to know which congregation has the best best pitch-in in Indiana. That's what I'd like to know of all the because you could go to a lot of pitch-ins, I assume. Trevor Burrus, Jr. Right, right, right. Yeah, yeah. You don't have to answer this. Like I said, this is gonna be a really controversial cong uh question.

SPEAKER_01 14:42

Aaron Ross Powell And for those outside, uh Indiana calls it a pitch-in. Could be my Kentucky roots would say it is a potluck. So just so people all are aware what we're talking about. Yeah, carry-in.

SPEAKER_02 14:53

Carrion is a board, I've heard.

SPEAKER_00 14:55

I had to force myself to say pitch-in because the first year I was here, I had no idea what people were talking about. I thought it was like a baseball thing or something. I'm like, oh, a potluck. I get that. So kind of where I thought you were going right now. I was like, uh who has the best pitcher? Who's the best pitcher?

SPEAKER_02 15:08

Uh, well, I think I would say uh our smaller congregations.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

Oh, for sure. Yeah. For sure. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 15:17

I think that sense of community and bringing out your finest and sharing and making sure everybody's really well fed. Um I think, yeah, our small congregations. And I think they have a tendency more to continue that kind of tradition. Uh I think it builds community uh for them, sitting around tables and eating good food together and sharing, you know, making sure you taste a little bit of everything. That is the bad thing about regional ministry, because you've got to taste a little bit of everybody's thing that they brought.

SPEAKER_01 15:49

Because you're right, everybody brings it out there fine. I mean, you're not going to bring a dish you've never done before to a pitch in our pocket.

SPEAKER_00 15:55

You shouldn't. Or that you bought at Kroger if you live in a small community. Right, right.

SPEAKER_01 16:00

It's homemade, made with love. But I mean, I think that's very much we are disciples, we are people at the table. I you know, for me, I'm sure for the two of you, I I get fed at table, both spiritually, physically, emotionally, whether that's on Sunday morning or any time I gather around a table with colleagues or friends, it's being mindful of who is there and the sharing of story one with another and the sharing of a good meal is is an important part of that process.

SPEAKER_02 16:26

Aaron Ross Powell Right, right. I I tend to, if I'm at a potluck at a church, try to sit with folks I may not know as well in the congregation, uh intentionally to try to build relationships with lay folks.

SPEAKER_00 16:38

Aaron Ross Powell Well, I do think smaller congregations sometimes too, uh especially in certain communities, are much better than larger congregations at gathering people. I was having a conversation with someone the other night, and uh we were talking about how we have forgotten to gather. We just don't know how to gather anymore since the pandemic. And uh there's something really, I think, unique in what I've experienced in congregations uh in certain places who just know how to gather people. Food is that way, and but it's important. It's important to grow something and make something and have an offering, have something to offer at that gathering that I wish um sometimes we could do a little bit more of in larger communities and and more you have to kind of slow down, right, and appreciate it and spend time. And I think that's a spiritual discipline that we on some level need to reclaim.

SPEAKER_01 17:30

And there's also a um, you know, growing up in a smaller town, uh the good, bad, and ugly. Um in a smaller town, everybody knows everything. Um and and it's harder to hide uh it doesn't mean it can't be done, but it's harder to hide who who you are. Whereas in larger contexts, larger cities, it's easier to kind of put on. Um whereas in smaller towns it's it's not as easy. It doesn't mean it can't be done, but it I think it is harder because everybody in in and a lot of the small towns I you know, uh everybody stayed there. Everybody knew one another. Not only did you know your friends, you knew your parents knew everyone. I mean it was you know, there was a lot of communal uh that that I feel uh that I I I have not fully found in the community that I'm in now where I found in Ashland or even in Lexington a little bit. It was just a smaller community. It was either easier to know one another.

SPEAKER_00 18:29

I would agree. Yeah, I think in in sometimes in our in our communities and in a suburban setting in Indianapolis, the church just doesn't play as large of a role in people's lives as it does in other places or it used as it used to, you know, a generation or two ago. And I think we lament that. I think it's also an opportunity for us to sort of reclaim how we might rethink gathering people and how that might uh how that might happen because I think people still need to be drawn. I think they they want to be drawn together, they want a purpose and a reason for being together, and so uh we you know we just need to rethink that. I think we do have an opportunity, though, for sure. And I think there's probably something we can learn from other communities about how they do that. I mean, I do think food, uh it's a good thing we're people to the table, because food does draw people together.

SPEAKER_02 19:21

And um, I I think people want a place going back to being seen where they feel like I mean, everybody wants a cheers, right? You want to be able to walk in and they know something about you and you feel safe there being yourself. And so I think that community aspect is critical to to any faith community, whether large or small. It's just the differences, I think, of how you build that and find that and create that with one another.

SPEAKER_00 19:50

So, Carolyn, how did you come to regional ministry? You mentioned serving in congregations prior to this. How did you come to regional ministry and to Indiana?

SPEAKER_02 19:58

I do things slowly. So when I was in seminary, I uh volunteered with the region. I chaired the camp commission at that time, oversaw the camping program in Indiana as a volunteer.

SPEAKER_00 20:11

That's a big volunteer job.

SPEAKER_02 20:13

It was huge at that time. At that time, we had three camps in Indiana to manage uh staff and volunteers and all of that. Um so but I loved that, and I loved that role. And so again, I thought, hmm, I might like to do this someday. This might be interesting. And so uh eventually after a shorter stint at a congregation in Indiana and then a longer stint in one in Northern California. Again, I was encouraged by my regional minister at that time, Chuck Blazedale, shout out, um, who said, you know, Indiana is looking for a new associate regional minister. Uh, why don't you don't you think about this? You've got the gifts. And um, so it was somebody naming for me what I kind of was wrestling with anyway in my heart. Um and so the process of discerning that and the lure of coming back to the Indiana region in particular, because my husband and I both had aging parents at that time. So we thought that might be um a helpful move as well. And so we uprooted our two Californian boys and uh moved back to Indiana with a call uh to serve in the region. And it's I always say there's pros and cons. Things I loved, loved, loved about congregational ministry that I miss terribly and things that I frankly don't miss at all. And the same thing about regional ministry, things I love. Uh on the whole I would say the gifts I have for ministry I think fit best here. Uh I can be a congregational minister and and still love that, I'm sure. Yet I think this is the place my gifts have fit, which is probably why I've lasted over 23 years in this position.

SPEAKER_01 22:07

Wow. I did not realize that it had been 23 years. Yeah.

unknown 22:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:11

That's amazing.

SPEAKER_02 22:13

It is. When I think about it, I think, oh, well, we'll get back to Indiana and I'll do this for a while and then I'll probably back end up, you know, in another congregation at some point.

SPEAKER_01 22:20

And so what a gift to the region. I mean, that's I mean I I do appreciate our region and the ways they care well for pastors and the way that they uh bring connection and and uh they do a great job. And and I'm lucky enough that Carolyn since COVID is really my office mate. Uh she is uh two doors down and so it is it's a lot of fun.

SPEAKER_02 22:43

Right. It's always fun.

SPEAKER_01 22:45

I I appreciate that.

SPEAKER_02 22:46

I appreciate having the space. I I do like that there is something fun about having my primary office embedded in a congregation. I do enjoy that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 22:58

It helps you probably remember and just be in touch with the rhythms of congregational life, which can be which can be, I imagine, difficult if you're not in the midst of it Monday through Friday.

SPEAKER_02 23:08

Right. Right. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:10

I think a theme we've heard from several of our previous guests is that if a in and Carolyn just raised it, if a minister comes up to you at any point and says, you know, uh probably some sort of call from God is about to be presented to you. I think we've heard that several times. So just so our listeners know, if that happens, uh you just need to know, you just need to know what's coming.

SPEAKER_02 23:31

I I think that's right. And one of the things that has warmed my heart is to see where uh a handful of people in my life that I've encouraged in that way as a pastor, seeing that gifts and others have later gone into ministry. And um that's very heartwarming. I got to preach an ordination that just meant a lot to me to an elder, for an elder in my congregation who I kept seeing those gifts. And after I left California, she went to seminary and decided to claim that and asked me to come back and preach at her ordination, which was it was uh a good gift to be able to say that to someone else after that had been said to me.

SPEAKER_00 24:12

Aaron Powell It speaks to the power of relationship. I think it's just powerful, not just for a call to ministry or anything, to have another person affirm something in us that we might be thinking about that we think might be there in ourselves. But what a gift from God to have someone else affirm that for us. Uh that's just it's a gift.

SPEAKER_01 24:31

It's a gift. So you mentioned uh early on doing some camp, overseeing the camp ministry. I'm I'm a camp kid. I know Danny's a camp kid. 52 weeks. Camp is a is a special place. What uh what about camp ministry um brought you joy? I mean, because that yeah, if you're if you're working, my guess is you weren't being paid a whole lot, if anything, to oversee those um labors of love, and yet uh it was probably very life-giving in your ministry. But what what what do you remember about uh that time?

SPEAKER_02 25:05

At that time, Indiana was writing her own curriculum. And again, I I mentioned love writing liturgy. I loved that process of sitting down with other ministerial colleagues and writing a curriculum that we thought might have some meaning. Um also nurturing uh other leaders and providing trainings, opportunities for counselors or directors and um big picture administration. It's not something that I thought I would love, but I think I'm good at. And so I can look at big picture and think, okay, we need this many people here and this many people here, and how are we going to staff this and make those connections? And um that has been probably more. Although I have counseled at camp and directed camp, uh, that big picture stuff always intrigued me more. So I guess it was good when I came back to the regional staff when I was uh starting in Indiana. Camp portfolio was my portfolio for twelve years. Wow. Yeah. So but the the ironic thing, I guess, or funny thing is that when I was a kid, I went to camp one time and I hated it and cried most of the week. Uh and swore I'd never go back. And I didn't uh until I was in college and spent a summer working at a Methodist church camp.

SPEAKER_01 26:23

And my guess is, as a counselor, you paid particularly close attention to those who were struggling throughout the week because you may have remembered your own experience at camp. And so it gave you a a certain awareness that maybe you had not had, if not for your own personal experience in a camp setting like that.

SPEAKER_02 26:42

Aaron Ross Powell Right, right. I think it definitely did. Uh but uh I I would still say what I really enjoy, and I still am directing. I do uh it's called You and Me Camp for grandparents and kids, and I love those little kids, and I love having the grandparents there and finding ways to help them connect with one another uh through faith. And uh I still enjoy that. But I I would say I still enjoy the directing part the most, the thinking ahead of time and the planning and making sure everybody has what they need and are well equipped to lead during the week.

SPEAKER_00 27:14

Kyle, we probably now that we've told Carolyn this, we probably need to pony up at some point and do some sort of service here at a camp in Indiana because I've not done that yet, and I feel kind of bad about that. So I don't want to throw you under the bus, but thanks for bringing me. I haven't either.

SPEAKER_01 27:28

I think that would be great.

SPEAKER_02 27:29

Uh Carolyn needs to be able to do that. If it's good to use some more male counselors if that uh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:33

It's fun. Dana 48 hours at camp. We would love to serve camp together. And we you know what would be really fun? I've never been to church camp with you, though, so I think that would be good. I would love to bring so my daughter's 11. These kids, how old are the kids that you and me?

SPEAKER_02 27:46

These are kindergartners through about third grade.

SPEAKER_01 27:49

Oh, I would love to bring the podcast equipment and ask just really pointed questions for the kids to participate uh in their understanding of faith and sharing with our with our audience. Because I just I think Oh, that'd be excellent.

SPEAKER_00 28:01

You get the most honest answer. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 28:03

The lens of a child, and I just I think that would be so cool. Because Miriam at Eleven's like, when do I get to be on the podcast, Dad? And I'm like, I love it. Uh give us some time.

SPEAKER_02 28:11

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 28:11

Give us some time.

SPEAKER_02 28:12

But I think that would be a good thing. We'll talk about that more.

SPEAKER_00 28:16

Okay, okay. We'll talk about that off there. That's a very good idea. We'll talk about that off there. Let's talk about that. Uh just so you know. Um have well, and I think too, camp is so powerful because in many of our regions, that is most people's either first or most involved interaction with regional ministry is camp, uh especially for lay people. And so um it's it's such a it's such a vital ministry. I was the same as Carolyn. I went the first time in fourth grade and hated it. Um our cabin counselor made us do push-ups in the cabin, uh, which is part of why I hated it. Corey Glover would love it. Uh he would have loved that. Yes, he would love that. And I didn't go back until I was in middle school, until a friend basically made me go, said, I'm going and I'm not going to go unless you go. And so I went and met some of my best friends, and and and I'm so glad I did.

SPEAKER_01 29:10

Um, and I would say a lot, not all, but majority of the folks I know, uh, their call story in some way, shape, or form has a camp component to it.

SPEAKER_02 29:21

Yes, I know that's true of many of our ministers, that they feel like that's where they really got that sense of call and I'd like to serve in ministry.

SPEAKER_00 29:29

Aaron Powell And so many of our counselors who are lay people were campers at one time, and that's still one of the ways in which they serve the churches. They I think that's a neat thing too to see people who went to camp who now are uh you know working and all that good stuff, but also giving a week back, you know, often a week of vacation. I mean, I used to tell people it's not a big deal for me. I'm getting, I mean, I this is part of my job, but for you, you took a week of vacation to come and be here and sleep in the heat and do church camp and all that, and I think that's a powerful uh testimony. It definitely is.

SPEAKER_02 30:01

I'm always impressed with lay people that give up that time, uh, give up vacation time, like you said, often to come and and be with our kids at camp.

SPEAKER_01 30:09

So uh what uh uh unanswered questions about your faith do you have? So many. That that seems that is also a theme that we see through when we ask it out a lot. A lot.

SPEAKER_00 30:24

We're beginning to get some connecting threads among our guests.

SPEAKER_02 30:27

Lots of questions. Lots of questions. I I think it it changes. It changes, I don't know, maybe even every day. The thing I think I've been living with most recently is how to jury alongside my mom who has advanced dementia. And uh my sister and I, uh my sister in particular is very good about uh giving her care. She lives in a care facility, a memory care facility. Um and my sister is most attentive, which she's now retired, so that's that's helpful. And often we reflect together, um, she'll ask me questions like what's the purpose of mom being like this, where she doesn't know us, she doesn't even I don't think even knows herself anymore. She doesn't know who she was. What's what's the meaning of that, or what's purpose, or what am I supposed to learn from that? And you know, we talk about it, and I said, Well my faith is, my understanding of God is that God did not give her dementia so that we had something to learn. Um I think we walk alongside her and we do learn things, but I don't think it's that God gave that to her because we needed to learn things, it's just that you learn things along the way. But the the devastation of that disease has me puzzled. Um it doesn't rock my faith, but I have questions like why do people linger in in that kind of state? Um is there any meaning or purpose to that? Because I don't see any. And so I'd like to know what what's that about? Why why does that happen?

SPEAKER_00 32:20

That's a that's a good question, and I'm I know you're not alone in that question because that's a tough thing to live with. Um we're gonna wrap up our time with Carolyn. Carolyn, thank you for being so generous with your time.

SPEAKER_02 32:34

I'm so glad to be here sitting with you two in one room, just chatting.

SPEAKER_00 32:39

This is fun, I know. We're just shooting the breeze. Our um we asked our guests the same final question that uh all our guests get asked the same final question, and that is what is the last book you read or television series you watched or podcasts you listened to uh that you want to share uh with and it can be one of each of the three, it can be just one, whatever you want to share. And as we always say, uh Kyle and I watch pretty lowbrow television, so it doesn't have to be really something high-minded. So don't worry about that. You don't have to impress us.

SPEAKER_02 33:11

Good. Good to know. I'm also not the boss of you. So um I I would say I watch too much true crime, either podcast or television. My husband would say it's too much. I think he wants to know if I'm plotting something, I think, some days.

SPEAKER_01 33:26

You can learn a lot of good things. You can learn a lot of good things. I mean, I guess it's not good. But yeah, you know, you can learn a lot.

SPEAKER_02 33:32

It's related to our son's uh uh magistrate judge. So you know I like to see, you know, the inner workings of all this. So I do watch a lot of true crime and listen to true crime podcasts. I would say the series that I finished not too long ago was um White Lotus. Oh, yes.

SPEAKER_01 33:51

Season one or two.

SPEAKER_02 33:52

Both. Oh I'm through both. Okay. And I'm puzzled by it. And still trying to process what what happened. And I know it's supposed to be satirical, I guess, is what I've read. So I've tried to do a little deeper dive into you know the satire of very, very rich people and how they live their lives and understand relationships. But it's a wild it's a wild ride. It's a wild ride. Yeah. So it's a good way to put it. Yeah, yeah. Jennifer Coolidge, though, I She's amazing. Love her.

SPEAKER_01 34:25

She is an wonderful and she plays that role so well. It it she almost plays it so well that I don't know whether she's acting or just being herself. Correct. There's a part of me that I'm like, I just kind of feel like that might be But she's like that in every show she's in.

SPEAKER_00 34:38

Even like you're like, is this really what she's like? I mean, it's very authentic.

SPEAKER_02 34:42

I would love to we'd love to sit down with her, wouldn't we?

SPEAKER_00 34:44

She'd be a wonderful guest on Sacred Sit Downs.

SPEAKER_02 34:46

Yeah, just have a conversation.

SPEAKER_00 34:47

It'd be amazing.

SPEAKER_02 34:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:49

One day.

SPEAKER_02 34:49

One day.

SPEAKER_00 34:50

We'll get there. So did you like season one or season two better?

SPEAKER_02 34:54

Oh, great question. Um I probably shouldn't do any spoilers, right? Yeah, I it's still fairly new. So there are some things I didn't like about season two toward the end of that. This is kind of surprise ending to me. Um I I don't know. All the relationships in both seasons were so complex.

SPEAKER_00 35:17

They're fascinating and complex.

SPEAKER_02 35:19

I think the early one, I think I like season one a little bit better, the focus on money, and I think season two is focused mostly on sexual identity and sexual exploration. Um it would be hard to say which one I actually like the best.

SPEAKER_01 35:35

And I think you had a really good it's complex. It is very complex. And we like to oversimplify relationships sometimes. And that show really shows the depth and the layers that go into relationships. I mean, it's just uh it's there's a complexity that sometimes we like to oversimplify. And so that's the one part of the show that I do agree I I enjoy on both season one and two. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 35:57

And your understanding of the relationships evolve as you watch more, which I also think is. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 36:01

I always want to keep learning more, which is what they do. Obviously, each episode you learn more about that person's backstory or or why they're acting like they are, and which is great too, that kind of character development that they do in there.

SPEAKER_00 36:13

Aaron Powell I like Steve Zahn too. He's in season one, and I think he's an underrated actor. He's good. He was good national security, Martin Lawrence.

SPEAKER_01 36:22

He's also a Lexington guy, so is he really? Yeah, he is. Steve Zahn. Is he from Ashland? No, he's from Lexington. He married the Jay Peterman group. Really? The the daughter of the Jay Peter from uh uh Seinfeld. Seinfeld. Yeah, really? Yeah, yeah. Okay. All right.

SPEAKER_00 36:38

I didn't know that either. Yeah, fun fact. All right. Learned something new. Carolyn, that was great. Thank you. Look, Carolyn, you brought that out of Kyle. Thank you. I did. Good job.

SPEAKER_01 36:46

I hope I'm right. You can fact check fact check me. Otherwise, you know, just email.

SPEAKER_00 36:49

If you want to facts check you, you gotta go back to 1995. You can do that then. Thanks, Danny. Uh Carolyn, it's been good to have you.

SPEAKER_01 36:56

It's been good to have you.

SPEAKER_02 36:57

Thank you both. This is wonderful.

SPEAKER_01 36:59

Absolutely. This has been another episode of Sacred Sit Downs. We hope you will join us next time as we explore the power of story. We can be found on all major platforms, so be sure to subscribe. As always, thanks for listening. Until next time, this is Sacred Sit Downs.