PodCrash with Matt Ebert
PodCrash with Matt Ebert
The Hidden Cost of Doing Business With Bad People with David Meltzer
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I'm Matt Evert. I turned one collision repair shop into a multi-billion dollar business called Crash Champions. Now I'm sitting down with people who have also built great things so you can build something of your own.
SPEAKER_00All right, Danny, who do we got today? So today, Crash in the Pod, we have David Meltzer. Oh, great. So he's an entrepreneur and former CEO of the Lee Steinberg Agency, the firm that inspired the movie Jerry Maguire. That's what I was gonna say, the Jerry Maguire movie. Show me the money, Matt. That's right. And so today he's coming to visit with us because he has a uh a book, a new book out. Uh the latest title is super interesting. It's called Don't Do Business with Dicks. Yeah, nobody wants that. Sounds like a that's great. Sounds like a big book. Sounds like there's some sage advice in there, I would say. We're gonna find out. So quick question for you, Matt on this. So you've mentioned how you'll pick someone with an imperfect resume that you think is a decent person over someone with a stellar resume, uh, and to use David's terms, uh a dick. Yeah, yeah. So what's the business uh logic behind that move?
SPEAKER_01Well, because it's the the person that matters, you can teach the skill. Like, so I'll talk about you you need the will, you need a nice person, you need somebody like the quality person, the skill can be learned. So the the resume is more just what have you done, what are your skills? It doesn't tell you what quality of person they are.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Well, this is gonna be a good conversation with you and David, and I'm a huge fan of David too, so let's get this started. All right, let's go. This is Podcrash.
SPEAKER_02So, Dave, I really want to talk to you about the new book that you put out. Yeah, right at Super Bowl, and uh, it's my eighth book, and I finally learned a valuable lesson about books. Really? What's the valuable lesson? Title sell. I've spent all my time on the inside of my books, and I had really shitty titles. Nobody at the airport walked by connected to goodness, compassionate capitalism, unstoppable, creating the life you love, going, oh shit, I need to read this on the plane. But the minute you post up, don't do business with dicks, everyone's like, where do I get that? I could have had blank pages and sold more than I did of the other ones.
SPEAKER_01That's great. So good tip because I haven't written a book yet. So I'll help you make sure that's it.
SPEAKER_02When you're ready, trust me, I have paid the dummy tax, man. I thought sports agents that they were competitive and they had an ability to oversell, back and sell, maybe even lie and cheat. Yeah. Nobody's worse than book publishers and book agents, man. They are they are the lowest of all agents.
SPEAKER_01Really? Because they say they can help you sell books and they can't.
SPEAKER_02Well, first of all, anytime you're dealing with emotion, you know, people buy on emotion for logical reason, they take advantage of emotion. So at least when you're with like professional athletes or divorced people, they have some sort of awareness to the fact that I'm going to be taken advantage of. This is an emotional situation. Yes. Right. But everybody wants to write a book and they have no idea the reality of writing a book. And so these publishers and agents basically have created a system where you're paying to advertise an overpriced book for yourself unless you already have a huge audience, or they finally have a huge audience and a name where I couldn't let them take advantage of me anymore. Got it. And that's why like Hermosi pu uh self-publishes still, because he understands the publishing game and he knows he can make at least 300% times more money doing it himself. His audience is gonna buy his book anyway. Anyway, and he can promote it himself, and they don't do anything to promote it, they don't even have any situational knowledge anymore. And then you have AI that can help edit it. Okay. You know, there's all types of different things that exist today. Why I will help you write your first book and it will be a bestseller. I love it. And I'll save you a hundred grand doing it.
SPEAKER_01All right, we'll split the difference. All right, right. So don't do business with dicks. You're right, the title got my attention. Thank you. Um what is the big lesson?
SPEAKER_02You know, in my journey, um, I sacrificed a lot to be around toxicity, whether it's toxicity in your family, people that trigger you, people in business, uh, the wrong kids at school. Even when I was successful, I always surrounded myself with people that interfered with my potential instead of positive influence. And the reason was I was insecure, right? I cared what other people thought, so I wanted to be a pleaser. And it wasn't just people, it was the things I read or listened to, or it wasn't a stronghold on my life to make sure that I categorized things correctly to live to my potential. And until not only I sought the wisdom that it takes, remember the difference between knowledge and wisdom is knowledge doesn't take time to get anymore. Yeah, you get it pretty quickly, right? Yeah, right. AI or Google. Right. Wisdom does. In fact, I always say that you know, experience the the problem with experience is somebody can help speed up the experience for you. But if I was helping you as a mentor, coach, or a teacher from A to B, like writing a book, I could speed up that process. I could tell you the steps to take, what potholes the myth, but you still are gonna have to experience it yourself. So experience is a private lesson.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, because there's always the I thought I understood, or I thought I heard what you said. Yeah, but now I understand. Or circumstances changed.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Right? Circumstances have changed a lot since the first book I uh wrote and gave people advice with, compared to the eighth book I wrote and gave people advice with. Circumstances have changed. AY wasn't even utilized, and now it's a big part of understanding what you're gonna do in writing a book, editing a book, marketing a book, advertising a book, selling a book, creating a funnel for a book, etc. So uh for me, the book really creates a framework with really clever titles, not only of the book, but of the chapters. Like I name one of my chapters, Dicks, Dicks Everywhere, uh, things like that that'll get people's attention to have fun with it. But in the end, that sounds like a nightmare place to be to me. Exactly. Me too. Uh understanding, though, how to identify toxicity and what to do when we do, and then to measure it within the context of the circumstance. Because just because, see, you we have kids. Yeah, when you're younger, you know, and you have a teacher that's a dick, or you may have a coach that's a dick, that's different than where we are today. We don't have to deal with it. I get to do what I want, when I want, with who I want for as long as I want. But what do people do when they have to sit next to a dick or work for one or be coached by one or taught by one? So you address both.
SPEAKER_01Oh, all to recognize it, how to move on from it, or how to put up with it if you have to.
SPEAKER_02Exactly. How to maximize it and to take the light, the love, and the lessons from it, not to feel punished by it, and how to not carry forward the toxicity, the trauma that remember, our meaning of our past that is created by this toxicity, this trauma from a young age and carries through through high school, college, graduate school, whatever you do, your first job. Remember, the meaning of our past is what limits our self-image. And nobody, nobody will ever overachieve their own self-image. So, what I try to do is give all the techniques of all the different facets of understanding toxicity and also understanding positive influence, one of them being relativity and meaning. What I mean by that is if we can teach people to take the mistakes, failures, setbacks, defining moments, historical relevances, traumas, and triggers that we have from our past, yes, and change the meaning of it to align with our divine direction instead of limit it. And so so many people like I will then bank. Don't you need therapy for that? So that's the funny thing. I spent like a million dollars on therapy. I lost over a hundred million dollars, including my mom's house. And when I made it back, I'm like, okay, I got to figure out this trauma, right? I got, they told me this is what I had. It cost me over a million. Personal development and therapy. Yeah. Past life trauma I have. I have womb trauma. I had infant trauma. I had, you know, the toddler trauma. Then I had a tween and teen trauma, and then I had, you know, 20s, 30s, 40s. And I was in my 50s doing therapy for the first time. And like you got trauma. It's no under a million. You got a lot of trauma. Exactly. I got a lot of trauma. But here's here's what the slow learner over here figured out. Everybody has trauma. So why not figure this out? And this is where I go in the book, Don't Do Business with Dicks. I said to myself, okay, here's what happens: there's uncertainty. Yes. And that uncertainty evokes trauma from what's stored in our brain. And you can go back to Dianetics, read that from L. Ron Hubbard. There's a shitload of stuff out here on this stuff. But in the end, here's how simple it is: Uncertainty, I'm afraid. Okay. When I'm afraid, our bioanatomical being, our biochemical being says, ego, protect us, I'm afraid. It could be of a saber-toothed tiger, or it could be of a hot girl. It could be of, you know, fear for our children, whatever it is.
SPEAKER_01So I feel like I'm in elementary school on this subject, but I do, I've learned a little. So I I get the I get the ego protective part.
SPEAKER_02So what happens when the ego protects us? Then we have a need to be right, a need to be offended. Because there's no saber-toothed tigers anymore. So we're justifying our feelings and thoughts, right? Separation, inferiority, superiority, anxiety, depression, anger, frustration, worry is a horrible one, resentment and guilt. I'm sure you felt these things. So what I've I stopped going to a therapist to tell me why they thought I felt guilty, resentful, angry, frustrated, separate, inferior, superior, all these things. Instead, I said, wait a second, I know my patterns. Next time I have a need to be offended, instead of trying to outlogic it, analyze it, and pay a therapist for it, why not just stop? Why not just breathe and drop? I meditate for the last 18 years. Why not get to center and then roll into my divine direction? Remind, remember, and recollect with God and say, wait a second, I don't want to feel this way. I'm not going to give it any energy. I'm not going to go over it, under it, through it, around it, lie to it, cheat it, manipulate it, deny it anymore. I'm just going to stop. It's not easy, by the way. I always say are you getting better at recognizing it?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and stopping. Because I get though, I don't know about all the steps you just did, like feeling. But to me, simply take a breath, right?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's right. Breathe. Breathe is first, right? And how about this? You're married like me. It's not easy to stop. I still get into arguments with my wife. It shows up the most there because it you get they installed our triggers, right? They they they that it's not just me. It's true. No, seriously. Love you, baby. I wrote, I wrote a best-selling book on this stuff, and I still, I just got an argument with my wife after I wrote the book. Okay. Yes. And I'm talking to her at first talking, but then it becomes yelling. And in my head, I'm like, stop, dude. And while while I'm still talking, right? I'm like, stop, shut the fuck up, stop. Guess where? Okay, cool. So I'm like, shut the fuck up. Fuck myself. And then I'm like, walk away, walk away. And I then I somehow say something even more stupid. And then she gets even more mad. And now I'm like, oh shit. And I'm having a whole conversation if I just could have stopped, even though I was telling myself. But eventually I did stop and I dropped. I breathed, like you said, reminded myself, this is a waste of effing time. I'm gonna get back into the direction where I want to be, in a positive direction of where I want to be. And that's how I categorize things. Is this interfering with my best self? Or is this helping me get to my best self?
SPEAKER_01That's great. Uh especially so in a work environment, you you recognize it quicker now, and then you move on from either remove yourself from the bad situation, fire the person with the right.
SPEAKER_02We're in our position, it's easier to remove yourself. That's why the marriage is so hard because you can't remove yourself. Yeah, you can't run from that. Right. But like any any of these guys in here, I can remove myself. You could they piss me off. I say, hold on a second, I go to the bathroom, no one's gonna chase me down and going, don't walk away from me, Miguel Meltzer. I want to tell you. Yeah, yeah. So, and that's true when you're young too. You just can't walk away from your manager, director, your boss, your coach, your teacher. So I really went above and beyond to help people, all people put it into its circumstance instead of just putting arbitrary rule to something like don't surround yourself with negative ideas or negative people. No shit, Sherlock, but what do I do when I'm around negativity and I can't get rid of it? You those are the things that I want to help people with.
SPEAKER_01So the big benefit of this, besides happiness, which is probably the most important anyway, but is that where the payoff is on this? Is happy more often?
SPEAKER_02It's helping people shift a paradigm. Because I when I lost everything and went through my quantum shift, I called it, but I changed my perspective to this idea that I already am happy, I already am healthy, I already am wealthy, I'm already worthy of everything. I just have to figure out what I'm doing to interfere with it. And so I do you believe that mindset that you had before was why you lost it? Oh, yeah, for sure. Okay. I thought I was in control. So I I had great wisdom. I surrounded myself with great mentorship. I was a giving good person, had a great mom. But you know what I didn't have was faith. So I thought I was in control. I thought so many times in my life I'd look at people and go, look what I've done. When in fact, when my wife was gonna leave me, I was wasted at 5 30 in the morning after lying to her. Oh, that's a great time. Yeah, that was really nice. But I remember I'm like, look at all this. Who do you how I said, how dare you talk to me that way? Look at all this. Who do you think did all of this? And that to me, it read I have a sign in the back of my studio. You're either humble or you're about to be. Yeah. Two years later, I was about to be really humbled. Oh, that's that's important though. Yeah. Very, but faith is a key component. And I'm not just talking about an individual's uh and nor do I care, individual faith. I'm talking about your faith, your God, not mine. I believe everybody needs to believe in something bigger than them that loves them more than their mom. Yeah, that when the evidence isn't there, you're in business, you built an incredible business, but the evidence wasn't all always there that shit was gonna work out. Oh, in fact, more not than right. Yeah. And that's where faith comes in. If you don't have faith, then you're gonna feel f punished, and you also are gonna start to have perspective by having faith because I use this analogy. I I love people who will diet all day and then they step on the scale at night, and they're surprised the scale is not lower. Right? Yeah, that's pretty much what we do in life. It's like we have good behavior for a period of time and then we check the scale. And of course, the evidence on the scale has nothing to do with what we did today. It's all the pattern and habits. So it's protecting and promoting, it's it's guiding us towards a better future. So we're supposed to learn when the evidence isn't there, or contrary to where we want to be in business, we're supposed to learn from that evidence to say, tomorrow I'm gonna do this differently. And things happen very slowly, and then all of a sudden, that's why there's so many overnight successes that have been in business for 17 years. That's exactly yeah, a whole lot of a whole lot of foundation laying. Yeah, like you said, nobody was there when you were coming home going, how the hell am I gonna pay this bill? Overnight success 25 years in the making. Everybody, even if they're young, you look at see the kids that were young uh and were successful in business, they were selling, you know, cards and Skittles when they were six, right? They were already learning business lessons. And so although they're 23 and somehow had a good exit at 23, they didn't just start at 22. None of them. They all started doing something. Bill Gates started playing on computers, you know, a bigger, smarter computer at a very young age. They were doing something and learning lessons that put them ahead on that curve of everything happens slowly, then all of a sudden. That's how exponentiality works.
SPEAKER_01So I know you've put you've put so much out there for everybody to know about your story, but when when you did lose it, how long did you stay? How long did you stay there?
SPEAKER_02So when I always say I lost, it was two years before my bank account was zero. Okay, but because that was rock bottom for me. But when I lost everything, it didn't take me that much time because I'd been working for two years on on self-help, on working on so you knew where you were headed. And unfortunately, I didn't know I was gonna lose everything. Okay, but I knew I I was in for a road. And my wife uh stayed with me and told me, as long as you're trying, right? Because I was using drugs, I was drinking, I was lying, I was cheating, okay, I was doing dumb shit, and I knew I had to make changes and I knew it would be difficult. I just didn't know the same way in our businesses, good things aggregate, and we end up with all this success from all the challenges. When you have bad behaviors, things happen very slowly, and then all of a sudden, yeah, I'd build up too much doubling of the negativity. Um, and I made some really bad decisions that cost me to lose everything. But by the time I lost everything, I got laser focused in this strategy that I wrote about in the book about surrounding myself, and it's time that I use. I spend less time interfering with my success or my potential or my higher self than most people I know. So, for example, I have professional athletes that want to shadow me, current ones, yeah, like real professional guys that you know. And those Mr. Melts are, you know, I just I would want to shadow you for a day. You know, success breeds leaves clues. I just want to watch you. I was like, super complimented. I'm like, perfect. By four o'clock, this NBA all-star currently is sleeping in my back seat. He's wore out, wore out. And he's well, maybe it was the workout he did before he let out, but good. So but normally he doesn't fall asleep at four o'clock and he does the same workout. Understood. Yeah. Right. So fair enough. I know. I was too. But here's what's interesting. He said to me, he's like, dude, you're 58 years old. You're not faster, stronger, in better shape than me. That's for sure. How is it that you have so much energy? You've been because I have them meet me at 4 a.m. Yeah. So I actually do a workout with them at 4 30. Okay. Not the same workout they do, but we both have the same non-negotiable schedule, so they can learn what I do and how we do it. But by four o'clock, they're interested. I said, it has nothing to do with that. It actually is faith-based. So I was talking about something bigger than me that loves me more than my mom. An omniscient, all-powerful, an infinite amount of energy, intelligence, intuition, and inspiration. That's what my God represents to me. Okay. This is big, right? Something so big that loves me more than my mom. So all I'm doing all day long is shortening the distance of resistance between me and God. So I'm just identifying, I don't waste energy. We all have the same amount of energy. If we have an infinite amount of energy in our source, inspiration, intuition, intelligence, then the real factor that causes us to be exhausted, sick, I call it dis-ease, is not being at ease. And so if I'm at ease more of the day than you are, it really doesn't matter how strong I am. Because I'm going to be able to produce more and you than you will, even though you'll be able to withstand more because you're physically fit, but I don't have to withstand more because I'm physically fit. That's actually fooling you. That was one of my problems with drinking, is I never got hung over. So I didn't have to recover. And so I thought I was fine, but I wasn't fine. Did you have to completely stop drinking ever and everything then to do that? It's so funny. I did for a while, but I I drink, I purposely now have like one You can do it in moderation now and be okay. Correct. Yeah. I can't do that with uh nicotine. So I never smoked a cigarette in my life. My dad smoked three packs a day from the time he was young until he died. But uh I chewed tobacco and I swear to God, that convinced me never to do heroin or anything that is that one hooked you. You could give me a dip right now, and I'd have to run to the gas station tomorrow. Right.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Um I think that's game wasn't that way. Yeah, great thing. Then um I never had to worry about it. But this resonates with me because I don't I don't talk about it much, but there's a time in my life I did a lot of stuff that I'm not proud of, and I'm actually embarrassed that that was me. And you know, a decade and a half ago or more, like I I call it the other side of bullshit. Like I love my life is that's your book name, bro. Yeah, maybe the other side of bullshit. Like getting all that behind me, like then life starts to like you don't have to worry, you don't have to look over your shoulder, you don't have to have regret. Like, I I still make mistakes all the time, but I'm it's clean living, if that makes sense.
SPEAKER_02You go to bed at night and you wake up even in a higher self because there's nothing that you didn't do. If anything happened that you didn't want to happen, it wasn't intentional. Right. Right. There's still circumstances that happen. That's right. And I never I have a rule. Uh, I think Bedros taught it to me. If you know Bedros Koulian, but I have non-negotiable behavior and negotiable behavior. So I'm hedging my bet against God's guarantee, which is I'm gonna give you 24 hours a day, every day of your life, and I'm gonna cheat you the last day. So use these 24 hours wisely in the divine direction in which you want to be and where you want to be or better. So I said, Well, what sucks about the 24 hours is I nobody on earth knows what's gonna happen in there. And so I'm always evoking fear, I'm always trying to. Prioritize, readjust, all these things that waste energy. So I said, What if I did this? What if I took half the day and made it non-negotiable regardless of the circumstances? So one of the things that I've done to change my life when I have no regret, resentment, or guilt is I say, number one, sleep is non-negotiable. I get a minimum of seven hours of sleep a day every day of my life, regardless. I wish I could. I know. I've had 18 years of a sleep coach. I got all these mechanisms. I took all that therapy money, started spending it on sleep. Way better money spent. But beyond that, even if you're not sleeping well to start, minimum of an hour a day on your health. Okay. So I'm and I'm very simple with my health. It is literally the things that keep physical or mental or both? Everything. Okay. So it's the things that keep your heart beating. Breathing, eating, drinking, movement, which includes uh balance, strength, and cardio, and then sleep. So all of those were those. Then I have a minimum of time every day on my family, which is counterintuitive to most people. But for me, I spend a minimum of an hour a day with my family every day, regardless of where I'm at. You get on FaceTime FaceTime, phone calls. I I tell my kids every day I love you, I'm proud of you, and I always have your back. Every day. How old are your kids? 26, 24, 21, and 15, son. But you still tell them that every day. Every day. And in every day. And when I have a conversation, I always ask them about three things. What did you do? Did you do your best? And did you have fun? Yep. That's all I ask. Because I don't give a shit what they do. I'm not one of those dads. You you want to play a certain sport or be in a certain court. You're not trying to live your life through them. No, man. Look, I will give you cautionary advice, but you take the chance. I just want you to know the risk, and then you can align it with where you're at. Now, if you have young kids, that's not true. I'm not letting them run around a pool just because I told them if you run around a pool, you're going to drown. And they're four. That's people, you know, when you're on the internet, people call you on your bullshit. It's like I tell people I spend a minimum of two minutes a day with my daughters because they're older. I negotiated. I wanted five minutes, minimum. But I always say minimum. I want more, but that's all they'll give me. But it's every day because two minutes a day is worth more than two hours on a Saturday of intentionality. Yeah. And people don't realize the math and the physics behind this, but your whole life changes when you're consistent with your sleep, your health, your family, your finance, your faith, the study of time, and the study of relativity. That's 12 hours of my day every day, regardless of the circumstances. Now, I do have exceptions. My mom got sick. Okay. They would wake me up at two in the morning to go to the home. It's like a crisis time, I remember. So I wouldn't get my seven hours of sleep, but I would make sure no matter what. It's like a mom with a newborn baby or a dad with a newborn baby. The next day, though, I made sure I got it. I never doubled down on the L's. So if I forgot to call one of my kids, which sometimes happens, I'm not going to tell you which one. But it does. I make sure that's the first call I make the next day. Well, at least I'm not the one who forgets to call it. Exactly. Oh no, they they know guilt really well. Um, or or they just punish me and like spend my money.
SPEAKER_01So you're very structured.
SPEAKER_02Yes.
SPEAKER_01Freedom to move within there, but you've got you've got to be.
SPEAKER_02The fun part is the other 12 hours, right? Because the other 12 hours are all awake time. The majority of that 12 hours is sleeping, remember. The majority of the other 12 hours is awake time. Now that's the fun time for me because I know that 90% of my success actually is derived from that those 12 hours of non-negotiable behavior. No matter what happens in the circumstantial behavior, because it's circumstantial behavior, only 10% of my success comes from there.
SPEAKER_01This is great stuff because uh time matters. Like, especially now, like I've gotten, you know, once you hit the 50 mark, then you really start to think about how much time you have left. Yeah. So it becomes really, and and now I'm constantly at home. I'm not home enough. I work too much. So I I try quality time is what I work on first, because sometimes the job makes the quantity not as easy. But very aware of like there is not forever hours. Like, so I just have to tell you how much you quite well, you know.
SPEAKER_02I flew in here to do this interview because I really like your show. But more importantly, what I thought of you doubled in respect because I came in and said, Man, I got a hard stop at five o'clock. You said, That's okay. I got a hard stop at 4 45. Yeah, because I want to go see my family. Yeah, yeah. And I said, Oh, I love this guy. You didn't have to say anything else. We're friends for life.
SPEAKER_01It's a rare event where we're just going. My wife has plans and I gotta be there for the kids. And so that's if I let her down, yeah, my weekend will be miserable. Yeah, exactly. Well, you get to do that.
SPEAKER_02That's the best part.
SPEAKER_01It is I'm with you. And I was on the road earlier this week, so I'm actually looking forward to it. Yeah. That probably makes you very efficient.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, efficient, effective, and statistically successful. Let me just explain sleep to everyone because they they don't work on sleep. First of all, it's the number one habit that you have. It takes the most time, and everybody needs it. If you don't sleep, you will die. I promise you.
SPEAKER_01But here's so I believe this because I told you I don't sleep well. And then somebody had me watch a podcast, uh, a guest of Rogan one one day, and he basically said the amount of people that can live on less than five hours sleep, rounded up, is still less than zero. Like, yeah. If you think you're one of the rare ones that can survive on it, basically you're not.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, it's like driving, like driving a motorcycle in California. If you drive a motorcycle in California for three straight years to work, you have a 100% chance of crashing. Right. Like anyone that drives every day to work for three years. Don't do that. They crash, don't do it. But here's the math of it that I that I found fascinating is so many high performers are high performers, but they're operating at 80% or 50% because they're not sleeping. Sleep is for recovery. Every great performer knows the better you recover, the better you perform. It's proven everywhere. The better you recover, the better you will perform. Sleep is for recovery, but what most people don't know is sleep is also for access to information, which elevates your awareness to make things easy the next day. Even when to buy or sell. That's subconscious mind working while you're sleeping. For sure, because you're accessing a higher level of intelligence, intuition, and inspiration. All three are really good for efficiency, effectiveness, and statistical success. So there's all these high performers that are such great performers that are operating at 80%, but their 80% is better than most people's 100%.
SPEAKER_01And actually, I think like some have said, most people give like 40% effort. For sure. Like so exactly. That's why you can win because you just look around.
SPEAKER_02Not like I said, it's so bad, but they aren't. They're not engaged, they're not I you know, I'm the chairman of Napoleon Hill Institute because definiteness of purpose is huge for me. Like we've read that book and will continue. Have you read Out Witting the Devil, by the way? Yeah, my favorite book. I well listened to it. I audible. Yeah, with Sharon Lecter. Yeah, me too. I still listen to that one. Yeah. Um, and I don't know how he's so intelligent to write that either, because it's so evolved and involved the conversation. There's so much meat on the bone when they're the the opposition and and Napoleon Hill are talking. Anybody wants to read that? Read that even before you buy my book. It'll change your life. Think and grow rich or outwitting the devil. Um, to that measure, though, think about where it's like that and it all started my back seat. Right? He's so amazing, but when he's working at 80%, because he's not he's interfering with his potential, I'm minutes and moments outside of my potential most of the day because I'm stopping, dropping, and rolling. Go ahead. To cheat.
SPEAKER_01What do you think he took away from that day? He was would not leave me alone in the world. Other than he, you ran out of energy, he ran out of energy first. So what is he gonna do different athlete?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, the concept was he too, even with everything in his life, which he has a lot of great things, was still in search of his why and his purpose. He was still trying to fill like I was when I was young, a God-sized hole with everything but God. And so I shifted his his perspective and said, What if instead of searching for this why, what if you realize you just had to apply it? And so I taught him to apply his why. And it started by seeking wisdom. Like you, I would give advice to you as a coach, inventory, teacher. The first thing I would do is get a sleep coach, right? Coaches, someone that sits in a situation one of them watches you told me about it. And the sleep aid, but I don't get any money for that. So I was holding off on let me tell you about QuickBooks, though. Man, QuickBooks changed my life. Yes, they are paying me. All right. Anyway, they're gonna love that. Or Apollo.io. Have you guys had their AI assistant? It's amazing. Uh, but no, Wave Watch and the sleep aid, no money. Um anyway, sleep coach. Sleep coach or anything you want. I have a breathing coach, a sleeping coach, a movement coach, all the things that are most important in my life because I know the fastest way to get to where I want to be is find someone that's already there and just have ask him for directions, right? Have them bring the best out of you to follow and teach you those directions, or be able and capable of helping someone get what where they want to be. And I'm blessed to be in a position in my life.
SPEAKER_01Do I have to go sleep in like a laboratory for the sleep coach to coach me? I move them in my bedroom to sit in the corner.
SPEAKER_02I did. There's so many more mechanisms today that you don't have to do a whole sleep apnea on a camera.
SPEAKER_01I'm on a camera in the test is horrible. Like it was instant anxiety for me. Like I just wanted out of there. Well, just the fact that I couldn't leave. Like I didn't like it at all. Yeah, I wouldn't be good in jail or anything like that. Good. Stay out of here. Me too. Like the fact that I'm stuck here all night and can't leave, like is I don't even like to be on the window seat, so I'm with you. I like to be on the aisle. Um so importance of sleep. Yeah. Understood. Good. Um, you're on a pretty big mission now that I've I've heard you talk about or read a little bit on online about you want to affect a billion billion people, over a billion. Don't limit me, yeah. I love it.
SPEAKER_02Impact over a billion people.
SPEAKER_01So tell me about that.
SPEAKER_02So first, you know, it seemed crazy because I didn't wasn't a real faithful person. I didn't believe in God calling you, or people say I was called by dude. I got a calling from God on a day that was uh a perfect storm. It was I closed after I recovered from losing everything, I bought my wife her dream beach house, and I was there with her, and I said, Hey sweetheart, you saved my life. I'm still getting choked up, but she saved my life. And my mom, her and my mom saved my life. And I said, Whatever. Money means nothing to me now. But whatever you want, just ask. Whatever I can do for you, please just ask me. I I want to provide you everything you ever wanted in this world, whatever it is. And she said, Well, I want one thing. And this is we just bought this dream house. And you probably can't buy the one thing she wanted, right? She said, I want you to take care of yourself. Because if you you want to take care of everyone else, always have. But if you don't take care of yourself, you're not gonna be here to take care of me or the kids because I was overweight at the time. I wasn't drinking or doing dumb stuff, I was just like a normal 40-year-old guy.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, if I can't, if I can't do the stuff I was doing, maybe I can eat, right? Exactly.
SPEAKER_02Yeah and not exercise the way I do now, right? And so um see, right while we were saying that, I'm like, huh. And then my daughter, she was 12 at the time, came out crying. I'm like, what's the matter? Her really good, if not best friend, okay, committed suicide. Oh no, at 12. And I'm like, what the like, how is all this going on in a matter of 10 minutes? And I literally broke down crying, and my wife's like, What can we do? you know, and and I said, Would you mind? I threw off my shoes and socks, and I said, I just want to go walk on the beach. So I'm walking on the beach, and God called me and he said, You are capable of helping people in so many words. You know how to make a lot of money, and you can teach people how to use the money for the sake of helping others, and you also have fun doing everything, even in shitty times, you're just that guy that has fun doing everything, right?
SPEAKER_01You and it was that clear to you that's what was going on, yeah.
SPEAKER_02And in a calling of you need to teach people to do what you do, to make a lot of money, help a lot of people, and have a lot of fun. So now I'm like, this idea of you got to change the whole world, how are you gonna do that? And I came up with this idea. What if I could impact over a billion people? That's an eighth of the earth. I have this philosophy that one particle of light overcomes a million particles of darkness. If I could light up a billion or more people, the rest of the world would follow. Okay. Right? This was kind of my premise. And I love that you said don't limit you at the billion. Yeah, now it's over a billion. I've already trained myself. So then I'm like, how am I gonna explain this? I've gone on this walk. They're Tony Robbins kind of numbers. Yeah, right. I'm like, how am I gonna tell my wife this? She's gonna think I lost my mind because of the suicide, because of her thing on me, and like now I've gone on this walk, and God talked to me on this walk after all this shit just happened. She's gonna think I'm insane. And so I was like, she's like, what's came back, she's like, is everything okay? I said, I'm gonna tell you something, and if you laugh at me, scoff at me, make fun of me, or think I'm crazy, it's okay. I I'm okay with it, but God talked to me. He looks at me and he goes, What? Well, what do you say? I'm like, I need to teach the world to be happy. How are you gonna do that? Well, I'm gonna power over a billion people to make a lot of money to help a lot of people to have a lot of fun because I've never met anyone who makes a lot of money, helps a lot of people with it, and has fun that isn't happy. How are you gonna do that? I go, I haven't figured it out yet. She goes, Well, let me know when you did. So I started doing math because I'm a big math guy, and I said, Damn, I could teach.
SPEAKER_01So, no laughing, no mocking.
SPEAKER_02No, no, because that's what I love about it, always believed in me. Right? All always, even when I was messed up. She said, Look, I will stay with you as long as you're trying. Cause I know if you put your mind to anything, I've watched you. My wife's known me since I was nine, didn't date me until I was 26, but watched me, knew me since I was nine. Said, I've never never seen someone they put their mind. You have no athletic talent at all, and you played college football. Like, okay, right? Like those are the kind of things she saw me do when everybody laughed at me. So she's never been one of those people to doubt me. And she's supported me the whole way. But it was interesting because I did the math and I said, because I I have a big advisory practice, right? I do consulting, advising, I one-on-one coaching. I have a huge group on Monday that I, you know, I coach probably over a million people in total. Okay. But what if I could find a thousand people like you of influence, of impact, and help them empower a thousand people to empower a thousand people? Thousand times a thousand million, a million times a thousands of billion. And that's when it became really real to me. Now, I also went out. Do you know a guy named Tim Story, the miracle guy? I feel like Tim was a friend of mine. I'm like, I want to run it by Tim because he's like the miracle guy. He works with like all Oprah, you know, like really big uh Quincy Jones was one of his guys, but he works with really big, big people. And I said, Hey man, I have this big calling because he's religious as well. And I he's like, Well, what is it? I said, power over a billion people to be happy to change the world. And I said, But man, I'm human. You know, like I'm one guy. Yeah, I'm one guy, and I'm already at that time when it came to me uh 12 years ago, the the mission. And he's like, hmm. He goes, I just know this about God, Dave, and this changed my life. God will never give you an invitation without knowing your limitations. Yeah, give you more than you can handle. Yeah, and I'm I'm not afraid of saying I get choked up thinking about it because I'm years into this mission, and it's amazing how many people I've helped make a lot of money that are helping so many other people, and you know, I get the emails, the texts, the DMs, the phone calls. You cheer your sense on how far along you are in that I probably have at least 400 of the thousand of the first level. That's great. That's amazing. Yeah, like I like I've been working years with those 400 people, and they have their own communities, their own coaching, their their their own impactful books, and things like that.
SPEAKER_01Anyone that like stands out? Oh, totally. Or are is this like a no like no?
SPEAKER_02Like I've Bucky O'Neill. I don't know if you know who that is. His dad worked with Tony Robbins, and he's more spiritual than I am. I'm more pragmatic, business type of, and then I infuse spirituality into business. He's more spirituality, and he needs my help on the business side. He never figured out how to make any money, still doesn't. Like he goes like it goes like this, man, because God is like anything. God doesn't want him to keep it. Yeah, I don't know. No, see here, just real quick, I gotta touch on this. Money is a man-made construct. Yeah. So do not believe your mom when she tells you the more you give, the more you will receive. It does not apply to money, it applies to love, it applies to kindness. I promise, you give your love, more good love you give, the more you'll get back. The more kindness, the more, but the more money you give, any entrepreneur. It goes to its frequency. But it doesn't just automatically you gotta actually give more and find where you're given more of money. Okay. So you are given more. Every time you give more, you're given more. It with money, it's just more difficult to find what you're being given because of the punishment aspect, the evidence aspect. And then here's a weirder thing about money. What I think, I think even harder than finding and and seeing what you're given money-wise, it's receiving it that most people have the biggest problem with. Really? Most people don't like to receive money, they have literally all types of interference. Well, I don't like somebody to just hand me money, but I love to have earned it. Yeah, that's different. See, you have a problem with money then, because if you don't want or you don't feel as comfortable as someone handing you money, then you don't believe there's more than enough money for everyone. And also, let me just change real quick your perspective of it. I would love for all of you to give me money today. I would never have told you that years ago. I would love it. Why? Because I know if you're able and capable of helping me, all of you are at your highest self, you're closest to God. I'm not pressing you to do it, but if I get if I give you, if I give you an opportunity. And then Dave must need some money. By the way, that food in the kitchen. But no, when you're when you allow, when you allow other people to be able and capable of helping you, they're closest to God. You're giving them a gift. This is like a conversation with my wife. I got some work to do. Yeah, you do. And then ask, and then ask for more. Most people don't ask for more. I have shifted my entire energy about money. I hated to receive.
SPEAKER_01I was born in a family where we were so broke, and my uncle Yeah, I love to receive it, but I guess I thought I needed to earn it. Like maybe is the what I need to get over.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, you don't need to earn it, but how about asking for more? A lot of people won't ask. Okay. Like every time I ask or pray or ask for more of something, I'm telling God I believe there's more than enough of it. And it's like walking by a table with two guys and they have 50 hamburgers, and I walk by going, Hey, can I have more hamburgers? Exactly. Like, because I have faith that you got more than enough hamburgers and shit. I want one. And I feel more than comfortable.
SPEAKER_01But if if you had a few, I'd like you to give me some, I'd like you to give me some money before you go back. How much? That's fine. All right, let's do this.
SPEAKER_02I'll make it. Do you think I had that even felt? How about just going? You're like me, I guarantee you, Matt. You go to dinner, how many times do you like other people picking up the check? I don't. No. And then you literally are cheating those people. Of the happiness of giving. I do I do believe that. It's so hard for me. I went to dinner last night with a friend of mine who probably even has more money than me. And he wanted to pick up the check at Restoration Hardware. And I'm like, no, let's just split it. And then I was like, why did you even say that?
SPEAKER_01Oh, because of course, but I am. Yeah, and I um I'm that way. And then when somebody insists, like I do understand, like, don't rob them of the joy giving, but I'm like, man, I'd order some cheaper if I thought you still got issues, like me. Yeah, exactly.
SPEAKER_02That's you know, I always make the joke, oh, I would have ordered more. Yeah, but this is a joke. Right, exactly. If I really knew, I wouldn't have ordered what I ordered. Yeah, I'm still working on this stuff too. So everything I say is not bullshit. It's just these are my practices and the progress that I'm looking for in my life. And I've now my kids.
SPEAKER_01By the way, got no problem asking.
SPEAKER_02My two two two of my kids.
SPEAKER_01It's only six and nine, but they got no. Just wait.
SPEAKER_02Two of my kids, the two middle ones. I wish I could ask like they did. Yeah. Yeah. And I encourage it.
SPEAKER_01Shame of it at all. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02No big deal. Just wait. Wait till they get access to like your Amazon points and you know, your credit card. And you know, then they start doing street hustles in uh with their Uber. So it's like, damn. Wait a minute. You got like a street hustle with an Uber? Yeah, my. Daughters with DoorDash Uber, Uber Eats, and that stuff.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02It's like, I look at the bill, I'm like, this is a lot of money. I'm like, how am I? And then, oh, there's five people. And you collected, everybody Venmoed you the cash, and dad paid there. Dad paid for five dinners. And you I'm like, how do you have more money in your bank account at the end of the semester than I gave you? A little commission, Dad. Exactly. And I didn't, you know, as an entrepreneur, I didn't know to like give them, you know, kudos or punish them. I didn't know what to do. I was kind of like on both sides of the fence. I'm like, good for you. Yeah. All the creativity. That's so good. Don't do that at the job, though. You companies don't like that. You get fired for that stuff. I got I got promoted. I got promoted at West Publishing, my first job too quickly, and I hired a bunch of friends. And one of them in the old days, remember when you used to get the taxi cab chits? So you would write, right? He uh he was leaving the cab with me and he forgot that I was the vice president now. And he's like, Oh yeah, can you give me three or four of those on his way? Then I got another kid because you get $25 a day per diem. Yes. And he would stop by at the airport, the chilies to go or whatever, and get a $25 gift certificate. Because he already ate on the plane. Yeah, they're gonna spend there. There's all kinds of good street hustles.
SPEAKER_01Sometimes it's survival. I was okay with it. This has been um great, and it's good to hear you talk pretty openly about stuff that you've learned and how great you're doing, but also talk about like there's still so much to learn and do. And at the same time, like I can help a whole bunch of others still with what I've learned already.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, and that's you know why I do these interviews, if I'm people like you that are already impacting so many people, because it's so worth the time to hopefully plant even one seed under a tree that I may not sit under someday, or you may not sit under someday. As your kids get older, they'll start rolling their eyes at you. One of my favorite lines, because my son's 15. I have three daughters, 26, 24, 21. But the 15-year-old started rolling his eyes at me. Okay, especially when I say, Hey, I love you, I'm proud of you. Your back is like, you know, rolling his eyes. And uh now I just say thank you. He's like, Why are you thanking me, brah? I'm like, first of all, I'm not your bra.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I get the bra from my nine-year-old. Yeah, no bra. Every time I come back, I'm not the brain of your dad, I'm not your bra.
SPEAKER_02I'm not the bra. But beyond the bra thing, I'm like, dude, thank you. He's like, why? I go, because you acknowledge what I said and you planted it. I saw you plant that seed. Someday somebody else will water it, and uh you'll be thanking me again. So thank you for acknowledging what I said at least. I love you. I'm proud of you, and I have your back.
SPEAKER_01Do you worry about um your kids are a little older now, so you've probably seen a lot of the stuff take root and stuff. For me, like I I have no clue how my kids are gonna turn out yet. Yeah, you you like how do you start teaching them some of this stuff at an early age? And you expose them. Let them watch, let them watch.
SPEAKER_02Is that right? I I I told my mom before she passed that yesterday was a one-year anniversary of my mom passing, and I'm a 58 year old mama's boy. I still thank you, and I'm blessed to have her. But I I literally called my mom every day, and now I text her. I kept her cell phone in the plan on my thing. I text her every day. I'm happy, I'm healthy, I love you, and I appreciate you forever, every day. Okay. Um, but with my mom, I told her before she passed, I said, It's gonna be pretty creepy if it answers back. Well, what's weird is sometimes I pick up that phone and I call my wife, and I accidentally did yesterday, and she's breaking out. I didn't mean to send a year anniversary side trick. My mom's calling my wife, and she's like, oh shit. Anyways, I uh hopefully I'm not gonna lose my trade of stuff. But I told her, I said, Mom, I just have to admit, I don't think I've ever listened to you. Like I've always like double-checked your advice. I've always believed that you love me too much, so the advice you gave me was out of fear, you're always trying to protect me. I don't need that kind of advice. I said, but I just want to thank you because in my whole life I've never watched anyone more than my mom. And because I watched you, because my five siblings watched you, they went to Harvard Penn, Columbia, graduated soon, because we watched you. And so to me, the greatest benefit was that I want to make sure it's not what I say to my kids, it's what they see. So it really is more what I do than what I say you believe. And then I think keeping them away, like I would have moved houses. We live in this beautiful place. My wife's like, This is my dream house. I'm like, we're fucking moving if any of those girls are around the wrong people, because I would lose that's where you lose control. You you will not be able to have the influence and impact if you're the wrong. Yeah. Oh yeah. So I'm I'm a firm believer. Sorry, there's an exorcism there. I will move homes. I will do everything I can to keep my kids in the right place. That's why sports are so important to me because it keeps them in after school the right places, and they come home and they get tutored and they they they do the things that I can see. They all, if they're gonna party, they're partying at my house. I purposely created a fishbowl at my house. It's a vanishing, uh it's an outdoor uh living room with one of those you know vanishing walls, but it's all glass because kids are stupid, all of them. I don't care how smart you are. So I turn on the lights outside, turn on the lights inside, uh turn off the lights inside. So it's like a fishbowl. So, and they're so stupid they forget I'm home, and I'm just watching them, you know, passing drugs, drinking, and then every once in a while I'd run out there, go, hey man, what's in your pocket? It's not mine. I'm like, give it to me. I found it. I go sell it to some other kid. No, I'm kidding. But it was really fun for me and my wife. We called it the fishbowl. Uh, that's a great idea.
SPEAKER_01But they always were at our house as much as we could. Yeah, we we they're young, but we we entertain a lot, and the hope is, of course, have enough fun stuff at our house to keep them coming around. Exactly. Yeah. So, you know, this has been great. Um, everybody should get the book. It's easy to remember, right? Don't do business with dicks. Yeah. Um we end this podcast always with a a question. We're all about championing people here. And so given the opportunity to champion a person, past, or present, who would you who would you pick and and why? Wow.
SPEAKER_02Um I probably champion my mom, uh, obviously. I got a hunch of that. Your wife for my from the conversation. I was excited for my wife and my mom, but with a one-year anniversary, and I always champion them both. Not always, you know, because I do, I'm one of the few people that they say it all the time on stages and interviews, how much I adore and love my wife and how I'm a mama's boy. But truly to champion my mom is to live to my best self. So, like every time that I'm a kind person, like I feel good that I'm championing my mom. My my mom purposely named me David Meltzer. David means beloved, Meltzer means servant. Okay. And so when I grew up, when I got older, my mom's always said, You gotta live up to your name. If I did something outside of the scope of being a beloved servant, you gotta live up to your name. When I lost everything, I had lost my mom's home. The only reason I wanted to be rich initially was to buy my mom a house and give her financial security. I lost her home in my bankruptcy. Oh, wow. I told her in tears, Mom, you need to move. And her first response, are you okay? I secondly said, Mom, you didn't hear me. You need to move. Oh, do you need some money? Mom, why would God punish me? And that's when she said it. God doesn't punish, He promotes, protects, loves, and perfects you. You need to figure this out, son. He's protect you gotta figure this out. And then I said, I don't believe in God. And my mom's very religious, and she said, smirked at me and said, You don't believe in God? You believe in God. You just believe in the wrong God. And so that woman who told me that I was gonna be humbled or about to be to name me a beloved servant. There's no one else I'd rather champion, especially in a one-year anniversary uh of her death. So I appreciate you giving me an opportunity to champion her here in this champion podcast studio.
SPEAKER_01Thank you. Appreciate you doing it and being vulnerable a little bit there too. So appreciate it very much. It's been a great time. Yeah, man.
SPEAKER_02We'll do it again. I'll have you guys on my show, man. I got so many shows. We need we need to flip the the script here, brother. I gotta learn from you. I'd love to do that.
SPEAKER_01That'd be great. That'd be awesome. Look forward to it. I hope you enjoyed this conversation. If you want more podcrash in your life, which of course you do, make sure to like, follow, and subscribe to us on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcast. Catch you next time.