What if the Voice in Your Head isn't Yours?

In this episode of The Path Home, we explore how beliefs, fears, family conditioning and early experiences can quietly become part of our identity until we no longer question where they came from.

I introduce the practice of self-stalking: becoming deeply curious about your own reactions, triggers, thoughts and patterns without judging or immediately trying to fix them.

Because a feeling can be real without the story attached to it being true.

This week, I invite you to notice one recurring belief and ask:

Where did this come from?

Whose voice is this?

And is it still true for the person I am today?

Maybe coming home isn’t about becoming someone new.

Maybe it’s about discovering what was never you in the first place.

Sonia Bellucci

The Path Home 🎙️

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:01

Welcome home, episode number two. It's absolutely my pleasure to be here with you today to continue our conversation about healing, about trauma. We were never broken. Never. We just learn learned to live in a state of perpetual survival. Have you ever wondered the little voice you hear at the back of your mind consistently? Have you ever noticed the little whisper? The little whisper at the back of your mind is a condition that started before you had a language, before you understood language. The little voice that now follows you everywhere, where I do like to call it Astolka. It's a little voice that has been absorbed during conception, during pregnancy, birth, and few years after birth. We are born we are born without a story. We are born as pure beings. Before we can create our own narrative, we actually start to adopt the narrative that has been created by the environment, by our parents. Meanwhile, we were inside of our mum womb. If this is the first time you hear this perspective, sit with it, don't reject it immediately. We are just having a conversation. The purpose of the path home is about creating awareness, learning where trauma is coming from. Yes, how they are stored in our field, in our body for sure. But my intention with this podcast is creating a new awareness about yourself, about your reality. And I'm here to share information that you not commonly hear from other places or other therapists. The voice in at the back of the mind continuously say, may continuously say, not always, may continuously say, I'm unlovable. Nobody wants me. I'm the first one having had this narrative in my mind for a very long time. I'm ugly, I'm not good enough. All the these whispers, and there are so many others. If you want to pause the video for a moment and just take a notepad and start to write down what comes to your awareness, meanwhile, we are talking about the whisper, the self-talk that most of the time we don't even hear consciously. The story that plays out all of a sudden. May I tell you a story about myself actually? That will help you to understand how deep and hidden sometimes the negative self-talk is. Years, years back, I was just out of my separation, and uh I had a lot of appearance problem, body, acceptance problems. So I started to exercise, I started to change myself, I started to create this new way of being. After a few months, I felt good about myself. I was looking myself in the mirror and saying, Yeah, you you look okay, you look you look nice. And then in the morning, anytime I was just waking up, passing in front of the mirror, I was like, Oh, you're ugly, oh my god, you're ugly. One day I stopped because I heard myself, what I was saying to myself, and I immediately took notes of it, and I say, Oh, I thought I had done so much work on myself, and now I'm discovering that I'm still in square one, so there is more work that needs to be done. Because one thing is the facade is appearing in a certain way, and another way, another thing is deeply, deeply accepting the self. The work, what happened inside of my awareness by discovering that I was actually stalked by an inner voice, an inner judgment that was really trying to understand where this was coming from. How was that possible? As I said, we learn to hear, we learn to hear before we understand language. So I'm introducing a new perspective into the podcast, in your awareness. If your mom meanwhile was pregnant of you, or the moment conceived you, and I'm going to talk about something that may trigger someone. So if this is not sitting well with you, maybe stop the video, sit with it. If you feel to come back and back, otherwise just leave it. Not always everybody is conceived out of love. Sometimes the conception happens in a moment where there is shame, there is fear, there is control. So the way you are conceived creates later on a narrative in your own awareness. I'm always unwanted. Is this you? Have you ever asked yourself where is this coming from? I must have done something wrong. All these whispers may belong to your mom, to your dad, at the very moment of conception, during pregnancy. Maybe they were arguing about having a baby. Maybe one of the two parents wasn't really sure. And you heard it before language can actually be learned. This is not about blaming. This is a creating a new awareness that serves you, that helps you to say, wow, this is not even mine. Many people come in my studio and say, with all the work I've done on myself, this is still strong in me. There is nothing that can shift this problem. You know why? Because the story began before you. Because the story that you are trying, the identity, the state, the negative pattern, the addiction that you are trying to resolve is not really yours. Is ancestral, is lineage, is what I call negative legacy and it down. How can we change that? How can we change that? Is possible. It's possible with perseverance, consistency, challenging the self to discover the roots. There are many amazing powerful techniques that can be used to change this inner state that has been handed down to you. During my consultation, I do a lot of inner child work, shadow work, family consolation, clearing the lineage. But just becoming aware of is already the first step for healing. Is already the first step that sets you free. Sorry my accent. Observing but not sorbing. I said in the first episode that breeding is very, very important. And breathing with observation becomes a key to change. What that means. Have you ever tried to observe your thoughts? And when you observe the thought, you're actually breathing in and you bring yourself to present. If you don't follow the strategy, the technique, this new perspective, when you think a thought, the thought becomes the reality. True. When you learn self-regulation, you learn to observe the thought, and you start to observe how you feel about it, how it sits in your body. Is your body becoming heavy? Is your awareness assigned to you? This is it. This is the ongoing reality. Observation without becoming what you are observing. Take notes, detach, and then go further, further through. And you can ask yourself, now that I am aware, I'm aware that certain thoughts have been learned before I could even I could even speak. Is what I'm thinking my mom's, my dad's, my brothers, my sisters. The moment you question, the moment you observe, you question, you breathe, is the moment you can become aware, you can learn what is hidden behind you. They created a false reality. You don't need to fix anything, you're not damaged, you just need to learn, to observe, to detach from what you're feeling, to detach from your reality. Maybe another new perspective that you may learn today is that we always have filters between us and the reality, even if the reality seems very real, as you say. But there are filters. Imagine to have lots of glasses in front of you that distort your reality. So one pair of glasses could be what you learned during pregnancy from your mom and dad. Another pair of glasses could be what you've been you have been continuously hearing throughout childhood. So when you want to understand if your reality is something that has been created by your own perception, or your reality has been created by repetitive little trauma from conception, pregnancy, birth, early stages. And when you observe, when you actually ask the right questions, when you ask yourself, when you become aware of the whisper, the self-talking, this self-stalking inner talk. This is funny, you also can detach, and you start to feel more empowered and say, okay, I'm observing, I'm not judging, I'm not reacting, I'm not fixing, I'm observing. Human beings want to understand, and until we understand, we don't change it. It's that simple. So becoming aware of this process, your brain, your nervous system start to relax and start to open yourself to new possibilities because now there is the understanding. So when you understand that during conception, and you can investigate this, investigate this word, you can ask questions if your parents are still alive, if they still remember what was happening during conception. What what what you can ask your parents what were you experiencing during pregnancy? Because you will learn so much on why you are experiencing the reality with the feeling you have.

SPEAKER_00 18:39

Next time we talk more about becoming your most purest energy.

SPEAKER_01 18:59

Can I say it is? Next episode is where because you had one week to observe yourself, you will notice the inner self-talk, the whisper, the conditioning. Our bodies integrate everything we hear. So when there is a positive conversation, there is a positive podcast that can create a new awareness, your body relaxes, your body integrates, your body processes. Meanwhile, you are listening, when you are going to stop listening before going to sleep, all of a sudden, boom, something comes up and say, Oh, yes, that's true. And I do want to give you a little bit of homework, which is very much what I already said. For the next seven days, six days, can you catch yourself in your thoughts? Try to catch yourself all the time what you are saying to yourself when nobody's listening, even when you're not listening as well. So that is why I call it self-stalking, because stalking means that you're not aware of this. And that is the key. Catching yourself in what you say to yourself. Remember the example I gave to you before of myself in the morning. That was such a profound moment for myself. And I want to leave you with a question. Maybe coming home isn't about becoming someone new. Maybe it's about discovering who you are in truth. Before you were in printed condition, consciously, subconsciously, voluntarily or unvoluntarily. Take a deep breath in, breathe very deeply. I always like to guide my clients, and I'm going to do this with you as well throughout the podcast. Because when you breathe in, you bring your awareness into the present, you bring your awareness into your body. And when you are in your body, you can become more aware of what is really happening. You are here for a reason. You are listening to me for a reason. You are listening because there is something that you want to change in your life or you want to learn in your life. And I'm here for this. I'm here for I'm here to give you tools, strategy, and technique to break the pattern of being what you're not. Take a breath in very deeply. And I want you to imagine that inside of your belly, where you breathe in, inside of your belly, there is a beautiful ball of light. Breathe into this ball of light. And imagine this ball of light being your inner divine intelligence, the pure divine intelligence, breathe into this ball of light, and allow this ball of light to infuse every particle of your being with a new truth, with a new perspective. In the meantime, I'm going to say thank you so much for listening. Thank you so much for being here. If you feel that this podcast really opened a new awareness and you know that someone really needs to hear it, please share. Come back next week. If you have any question, comment, send me an email, connect with me, and I will be more than happy to enlighten your journey. If you need a private session, I do work online, I do work face to face. I'm based in Melbourne. I do have clients around the globe. So you can connect with me through my mail and say, Hey Sonia, I really need to work things through. Let's get this done. For now, I wish you to have the most amazing evening, morning, afternoon, wherever it is for you. And I'm so looking forward to see you next week with the third episode. Welcome home.