Caregiving & Conversations
Caregiving is one of life's greatest acts of love, but it's also one of its greatest challenges. This is a space where caregivers, families, and professionals come together for honest conversations, practical resources, and heartfelt stories that remind you that you're not alone.
Caregiving & Conversations
S1E5: Momma & Me
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In this special episode, I sit down with my mom as we reflect on her journey with Multiple Sclerosis, talk about life in an assisted living community, and celebrate her birthday together. It's an honest, heartfelt conversation filled with laughter, love, and cherished memories. I hope you'll take a listen and experience the beautiful bond we share.
Welcome to Caregiving and Conversations. We have a special guest today. We have my mother. Um, some of you know her as Miss Lynette, some of you know her as Auntie, some of you know her as Netnet. Welcome to Caregiving and Conversations, Mom. How are you today? Chilly. And grateful. And why are you grateful today? It's my birthday. Hey, so this is being recorded on June 29th. This is my mother's birthday. So happy birthday, mom. Love you. So um, we're just gonna ask a few questions about my mom and how she's doing and if she can recall uh her diagnosis with multiple sclerosis. As you guys know, um this podcast was launched because of her. So we're gonna see what she can tell us about multiple sclerosis. So, mom, do you remember back what it was about 25, more than 25 years ago when you were diagnosed with multiple sclerosis? Do you remember how you initially felt when you got that diagnosis? Angry? You were angry? Yeah, yeah, that's that's that's reasonable. Uh, I I think I was angry with you too. Yeah. So a lot of times when people get the diagnosis, um, it affects the person who's getting that diagnosis, but it also affects the family members. And so one of the things is um my brothers and I, we we have stepped up. We have stepped up as caregivers, we stepped up to make sure that the quality quality of life that my mom, our mom has is going to be the best quality that we can give her. So, how do you like having your kids as your caregiver?
SPEAKER_00It's nice, you know, doable. Doable, okay.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it's doable and it's okay. Yes, yes, those are all things are true, right? Um, how do you like living in the assistant living facility? Because I know it gives you more independence and you're not living with your kids. So, how do you like living in the assistant living facility?
SPEAKER_00Well, they have musicians who come, and that's the part that I really like. The musicians who can play, and then they have activities, and sometimes they go down from the activities, and they're okay too, you know.
SPEAKER_01Okay, so you like the music and activities, which is good. You get exercise. Yeah. Um, what about your happy hour that you go to on Fridays?
SPEAKER_00Well, we get some wine.
SPEAKER_01This is unfiltered, y'all. This is unfiltered. Yes, she is getting wine. She gets wine and whatever uh alcoholic beverages that they serve them on Fridays. She looks forward to that. If I call her at on Fridays around 2 30, 3 o'clock, she's like, I gotta go because it's happy hour time. So I ain't mad at her. If I could go at happy hour at 2 30, 3 o'clock on a Friday, I would go too. Um, so how are you dealing with your multiple sclerosis today?
SPEAKER_00Well, overall, I just navigate, you know, how I'm feeling. Okay, all right.
SPEAKER_01And the navigation is using the walker that you have, taking time taking slower walks and all of that. What are some of the things that you like to do? Um, as I look around, I see tons of books. So, how about reading? Do you like reading? Yes, I do. Yeah, yeah. And then during the summertime, where do you read at? On the patio. So you go outside on the patio and read? All right. Uh so dealing with the multiple sclerosis and the caregiving, how are the care workers here? How do you like the care workers here?
SPEAKER_00Most of them, they're okay. They're they're okay.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, she ain't gonna give, she ain't gonna give us their great, right? We're not gonna, we're not gonna get that. So earlier, my mom said that she was cold. That's because I turned on the air conditioning in her place because she has it on hot. So as she's cold, I'm over here sweating right now. So the air conditioning is on 70. She's cold, and the air and and I'm hot. So this is the imbalance that we have right now. I've never appreciated air conditioning. She's never liked air conditioning. So just imagine we grew up and it would be a battle because we were always hot and she didn't want to have the air conditioning on. And even when she lived with me, um, it was a battle because I had the air on and she didn't like the air. So that's one of the things that we have to think about when we're with our care as we're caregiving, the making the person that we're caring for just as comfortable, but also making sure that we're comfortable too. So there's always this balance of doing for them, but then how do we balance for ourselves? Um, so what are we gonna do today, mom, on your birthday?
SPEAKER_00I have no idea.
SPEAKER_01You don't? No. Oh, we're going to lunch. Okay. We're going to lunch. We're gonna meet Brother P, your son, and we're gonna go to lunch. Okay. Okay, it's hot outside.
SPEAKER_00Well, I appreciate hot and air conditioning. Yes, yes, I I I know.
SPEAKER_01Um, so do you have any words that you would like to tell the people out there just on this podcast? First, she wanted to know what a podcast was, and so I explained to her, it's where we interview someone and then it goes out onto the internet. It's like the Oprah Oprah Winfrey show on the internet. So, is there any words of advice, encouragement that you would like to tell the people on the World Wide Web? Anything, it doesn't have to be about caregiving or MS or anything, anything you would like to tell them.
SPEAKER_00Well, I'm grateful.
SPEAKER_01Grateful? Yeah, what are you grateful for? Every day I awake, I'm grateful. Every day that she awakes, she is grateful. That is a lesson for all of us. Um, because there's times as caregivers where it just seems to be too much. And I have to remind myself that grateful. I'm grateful. I'm grateful that my mother is still here. I'm grateful that I'm able to still care for her the best that I can. So those moments that are hard, we have to remember to be grateful. That's how I was taught. That's how we be grateful. That's how you taught. Yes. And you taught that to us. Sometimes I don't remember. It's hard for me to always keep that at the forefront. But she said something to me the other day. Um, she asked how I was doing, and I said, I'm good. And I had a lot of stuff to do. And she made the comment and she says, No, I said I was okay. And she says, Well, do it okay. Just do it okay. It's just that simple, right? Be grateful and do it okay, whatever that okay is. All right, mom. I want to say thank you so much for joining me on podcast on the on the podcast, caregiving and conversations. And remember to give yourself grace, to give yourself rest, and to give yourself love because you matter too. Bye-bye, everyone. Hello by mom.
SPEAKER_00Have a good day. Later.