Born Fabulous
Born Fabulous
Season 3, Episode 25, Part 1, Kristen & James Zoul with Lynn Metzger : "Pulling Back the Curtain - A Married Couple Who Has Down Syndrome"
What if living independently with a disability didn't just mean surviving, but thriving? Meet James Zoll and Kristen Ruppel Zoll, a remarkable couple both living with Down syndrome, as they share their story of love, independence, and teamwork. Joined by their dedicated Home Health Aid, Lynn Metzger, discover how James and Kristen have not only navigated the challenges of daily life but have also built a fulfilling life together, full of cherished memories and professional achievements. This episode celebrates their over five years of happy marriage, providing an intimate look at their journey from school days to their supportive companionship today.
Join us as we pull back the curtain on James and Kristen's daily routines, revealing the meticulous planning and cooperation that keep their household running smoothly. From meal planning and grocery shopping to chore distribution and financial management, see how this dynamic duo, with Lynn’s invaluable support, maintain a balanced and healthy lifestyle. This episode also touches on the role of their families in supporting larger responsibilities, showcasing the intricate web of interdependence that helps them thrive. Don't miss out on this heartwarming and inspiring episode that highlights determination, love, and the power of teamwork.
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Hello, my name is Greta Harrison. Welcome to Born Fabulous Podcast, season 3, episode 25. The theme of this season is young adults with intellectual disabilities living full lives of independence and interdependence. This episode features Kristen and James Zoll and Lynn Metzger. It is the first of three episodes with Kristen, james and Lynn, which is part of an in-depth series about marriage featuring parents, self-advocates with support staff and an employer. Lynn is an important member of their support team. Kristen and James both have jobs that they love. They've been married over five years. James and Kristen have Down syndrome. Now please enjoy this clip. Of Love is a Potion. The lyrics are by Melissa Riggio, who was the focus of season one episodes one through four. She had Down syndrome. The music and voice are by Rachel Fuller.
Rachel Fuller:Love is everything. Love is all around, love is all around. Love is a potion. Love is passion. Love is devotion.
Greta Harrison:Love is fusion. Hello James Zoll and Kristen Ruppel Zoll and Lynn Metzger, I am so happy to meet with you today. Thank you so much for giving us your time and letting us have a glimpse into your lives, hello.
Kristen Rupple:Hello, hello.
Greta Harrison:And I want you to take a minute and tell us a little bit about yourselves. We can start with James or Kristen, whichever one of you wants to go first. You can just give me your names and maybe one or two things you want people to know about you.
Kristen Rupple:I'll go first. Okay, hi, I'm going to thank you for joining the show and I am. My name is Kristen Rupple. I'm 38 years old. I'm working my job at Love Works First Aid, first Aid Cards and my volunteer job doing the Center for Community. I'm working with the Centerware and I got three sisters okay, all right, thank you, james.
Greta Harrison:Can you tell us your name and a little bit about yourself?
Kristen Rupple:my name james. Yeah, oh, it's okay, it's still your mess, yeah.
Lynne Metzger:James, maybe you can let Greta know about how you work at my Yard Live.
James Zoul:Yes, yes, I can. Yeah, I work at my Yard Live and making a new bill.
Greta Harrison:Okay, Thank you, James. I know you love your job and we're going to talk about that later on. Thank you and Lynn, can you tell us a little bit about what you do? What is your title and what is your role when you help support James and Kristen?
Lynne Metzger:So my title is Home Health Aid and my role here is as a support person. James and Kristen have been living on their own for a few years now I think maybe four and there are some life skills that I help them with on a daily basis. But they, uh, they run this household pretty good. But my role is to support them in um, keeping the household running um and assisting them when they go to their work, making sure that they're, you know, prepared and just kind of giving them just a little extra, just a little extra helping hand. They do really good on their own, but sometimes they need just somebody to help you know, maneuver some of the more complex issues. So that's my role. I'm here to help and support and whatever it is that they need.
Greta Harrison:OK. So I know that they take the lead. I know that they run the household. When you said, I know they both work and volunteer, both Do you help with rides for them or for them, or yes, okay, so, um, myself, I am kristin's job coach.
Lynne Metzger:I provide the transportation to her work. Um, we did the interview process together with them, got her familiar with it and then I had a hands-off approach. She would would be independent at work, but I provide transportation, facilitate schedule changes. James has another aide that helps on his work. Her name is Kayla.
Greta Harrison:So let's talk about when you guys were in school. I know you were both included most of the time in general education classes in school. James, can you share your favorite memory of maybe when you were in school? Art?
James Zoul:class.
Greta Harrison:Art class. Are you an artist?
James Zoul:No, just school.
Greta Harrison:Just in school? Yeah, but you loved your art class. Yeah, okay, just in school, but but you loved your art class okay. Was it because of the teacher, or was it the teacher and the kids? Why? Why is that special for you?
James Zoul:Yes, both Kids and teacher.
Greta Harrison:Okay, all right, but you're glad that you were included in school, aren't you? Yes, also fully included in school, in general education classes most of the time until high school, and even then, most of the time. Can you share a favorite memory of your school years?
Kristen Rupple:I went to Wissakami Foreign Arts. I take dance ballet and team in Wissak. I'm teen in music and in my high school I went to prom. I went to NAMO with my friends.
Greta Harrison:You like going to prom? Huh, mm-hmm. Okay yeah, you had some boyfriends before James, didn't you? And James, you had some girlfriends before Kristen, didn't you? Yeah, yeah, you had some girlfriends before, okay, well, and Kristen, were you glad that you were included in general education classes in school? Were you happy about that?
Kristen Rupple:Yes, I'm happy.
Greta Harrison:Okay. Thank you, James. Did you always know that you would meet the love of your life and that you would get married one day when you grew up? Did you know that? Yeah, I knew. You did know that you would meet the love of your life and that you would get married one day when you grew up. Did you know that? Yeah, yeah you did know that. Yes, okay, all right. How about you, kristen? Did you always know that?
Greta Harrison:I know that my dream is getting married your dream was getting married and you had a lot of sisters so, so you watched them get married, right?
Kristen Rupple:Yes, I do, and James is so sweet to me and I stare at his sparkly eye.
Greta Harrison:James is so sweet with you. And what was that after? You said after that James is so sweet with you.
Kristen Rupple:I always stare at his sparkly eye, like always. You like his sparkly eyes, I stare at it. You stare at his sparkly eye, like always.
Greta Harrison:You like his sparkly eyes.
Kristen Rupple:I stare at it.
Greta Harrison:You stare at it. Oh, that's sweet At his sparkly eyes. I love that. So would you both tell me a story, a story about how you met?
Kristen Rupple:Who wants to talk about that? We met in 2003. He's my best friend and we grew up together.
Greta Harrison:And when you met you already you were kind of dating somebody else and James was kind of dating somebody else, right, and you just got along better with each other, right? You were like magnets to each other, right, right, yeah, okay, each other right, you. You were like magnets to each other, right, right, yeah, okay, james. What did you first think of Kristen when you started dating her? What did you first think of her? Love all, all day. Can you say that again one more time, james?
James Zoul:love all day.
Greta Harrison:Love all day.
James Zoul:Love all day yeah.
Greta Harrison:Okay, and Kristen? What did you first think of James?
Kristen Rupple:He's very sweet.
Greta Harrison:He is very sweet. It's a very important quality in a husband. All right, did you each know that you wanted to move out of your parents' house when you grew up?
Kristen Rupple:When I never I talked to my parents. I sat down with them. I talked to them. That's what we do I sit down with my parents, talk to my parents.
Greta Harrison:So you sat down with your parents to tell them that you were going to want to move out.
Kristen Rupple:That's right.
Greta Harrison:Okay, what about you, james? Did you do the same thing? Yeah, you did. You did the same, so you sat down with your parents and you told them you wanted to move out? Yeah, okay. And what did you have to learn? What did you have to work on to be able to move out of your parents' house? You know there's a lot to living on your own. You know there's the shopping for groceries and paying bills and all of that, what did you have to learn?
Kristen Rupple:I learned like going to the grocery store with my dad, trash, and dishes.
Greta Harrison:Okay. And what about cooking and cooking? Yes, and cooking, okay, okay. And when you were learning those skills, was that when you were still at home and your parents helped you? Yes, they helped you learn those skills, okay. Did you have chores, kristen, kristen? Did you have chores? Yes, I do. And when you were growing up, did you have chores like when you lived with your parents?
Kristen Rupple:Yeah.
Greta Harrison:You did? I did, okay All right, james. When you were living at parents. Yeah, you did, I did, okay All right, james. When you were living at home. Did you have chores?
James Zoul:Yard work with dad.
Greta Harrison:That's a big one, okay, so your yard work you did with your dad. So when you moved out, is that when you learned about cooking and grocery shopping and all of that? Did you learn that when you moved out or did your parents help you before?
James Zoul:I don't know.
Greta Harrison:I'm sorry, can you say that one more time?
James Zoul:I don't know.
Greta Harrison:You don't know. Okay, all right, that's okay. Now tell us about your support team. You have Lynn who helps you, and you have other people. We have four aides.
Kristen Rupple:Okay, we have four aides and they help us all the time.
Greta Harrison:They help you all the time. Okay, can you tell us a little bit about how they help you?
Kristen Rupple:Drive me all the time, okay, going to the store and laundry and who needs help?
Greta Harrison:Okay, and Lynn, are you there? I am, lynn. You want to fill in some gaps of how you help and maybe the rest of the team helps. Okay.
Lynne Metzger:Absolutely so basically, james and Kristen, on a weekly basis they put together their meal plan for the week. That's done as a team. James and Kristen. They collaborate and decide what kind of meals, and they're they're really good at it. They pick balanced meals, sometimes treats here and there, and do a sanity check, make sure we've got everything covered and take them grocery shopping so they are able to do the planning, the shopping and when we come back, limited cooking, depends, microwave Things like that is totally fine. If it gets a little bit more, I would step in and maybe cook some things in the oven.
Lynne Metzger:On a day-to-day routine they have their chores, which they both have a list that they plan out every week. Who's responsible for what on what day, okay, and if there are busy times in their schedule, I might pitch in and help to facilitate that, because one thing that we try to do here is teamwork, encourage that we're all in one apartment during the course of the day, and so we all need to help each other. So we try to make that a reality in all of our day-to-day activities. But for the most part, james and Kristen have an excellent grasp of the planning, the purchasing and the cooking slash preparation for their meals. Due to the covid happening a few years ago, laundry, uh is done by kristin's sister and it's kind of just kept that way. Uh, laundry with james is taken care of by his mom. Similar thing just became a routine. Didn't really see a need to to change it they don't.
Greta Harrison:There's no washer dryer in the apartment.
Lynne Metzger:There are. And so what happened was during COVID, uh, the parents would do the laundry because of what was going on. Now, um, the? Uh, james's parents still still do, and it's more so a residual from the activity in COVID, and I think it just kind of works out better for them. Okay, kristen does her like sheets and towels with Usha when Usha's here on Wednesday or Thursday and the balance of her clothes. That maybe need more special type of laundry care. Uh, special garments. Her sister picks that up, I don't know, once a week or once two weeks, I'm not sure the routine, but that's, that's how they they manage their cycle. They're responsible for their time. They've got a very good grasp on time um and uh, for the most part and that's part of the age responsibility is just to kind of keep them working towards the schedule if it needs to have to be a schedule. So that's basically how the household runs in a nutshell.
Greta Harrison:So what about financial things like paying the bills? How does that get handled?
Lynne Metzger:So in regard to, I'll just do the, the grocery, the grocery money James and Kristen independently go to the bank on a weekly basis with their aid and withdraw monies for the grocery for the following week and we help them pay the bill at the checker at the store. In regard to their own personal effects and incidentals, they both have a debit card and cash and know how to use it. Sometimes needs some extra help In regards to the larger rent, et cetera, utilities the parents handle all that Okay.
Greta Harrison:Okay, so it's a combination. It's really a team effort.
Lynne Metzger:It is.
Greta Harrison:And everybody has some responsibility.
Lynne Metzger:They do yeah.
Greta Harrison:Okay, Now, when you were talking about meal prep, I saw a great picture of I think it was you, Kristen, but it might have been James holding up two plates of really healthy looking food that you had cooked, and I heard that you were in weight, that you guys are very avid participants of Weight Watchers. Is that correct? Yes, we were in Weight Watchers. Do you want to tell me a little bit about that? Um, thank you, thank you. Thank you, Lynn. Yeah, yeah, I'll just pop in.
Kristen Rupple:Okay, well, we, James and I, joined the Weight Watchers. I feel like I lose weight maybe, and um, we watch our eat. And we watch our eat, of course, and we go to, we watch his meetings. We stay in the morning 9 o'clock.
Greta Harrison:Okay, you go to the meetings and you follow their meal plans.
Kristen Rupple:Right, you try to cook the healthy recipes.
Greta Harrison:That's right. Okay, I think that's a great example, and, lynn, you can pop in for this to help too with my question that I'm about to add here. You all also with your diets. You manage around gluten-free and thyroid issues and things like that, correct, that's right. It's something that I can't do. Dairy you can't do dairy, okay. And what about gluten? Do you avoid gluten too?
Lynne Metzger:oh, sometimes not all the time so, if I could just interject so with kristin, her dietary um restrictions are, uh, to be cautious with the dairy and cautious with the gluten. Um, it's never been rolled down that that's a hard fast rule, but that's her preferred method of of shopping, looking for those items and also cooking with those items. But she's not restricted from having them from a dietary doctor reason, but she is told that she needs to. You know, keep those at a minimum, okay, yeah, minimum, okay, yeah. James does not have any dietary restrictions per se that I'm aware of, and so he's. You know he generally likes to eat the same type of food that Kristen does, if it's a gluten-free and or dairy-free, depending on what the meal is.
Greta Harrison:It makes sense because they're together. His diet is more in line with hers, instead of cooking two different meals for everything. Okay, right, right, all right. Okay, I think that's great. Well, I commend you on the healthy cooking, thank you. I appreciate that.
Greta Harrison:Thank you for listening to episode 25 of Born Fabulous Podcast's third season. This was the first of three episodes featuring Kristen and James. I hope you enjoyed it and want to hear more. Short video clips from most episodes are available on our YouTube channel and on BornFabulousPodcastcom. You can also hear all released episodes of Born Fabulous Podcast on YouTube. Now, in episode 26, you will hear Kristen and James Zoll and Lynn Metzger further discuss support staff. James and Kristen also talk about their wedding and what marriage really means to them. Kristen and James have Down syndrome. Please follow and like us on Facebook, instagram, twitter and Threads. If you enjoyed this episode, I'd be honored if you would leave a review wherever you heard this podcast. Now, please enjoy this clip of Love's a Potion. The lyrics are by Melissa Riggio, who had Down syndrome and was the focus of Season one episodes one through four. The music and voice are by Rachel Fuller. Love is a potion.
Greta Harrison:Love is passion. Love never fails, lost in motion.