WEBVTT 00:00:08.960 --> 00:00:15.759 So this is part three and the final part of a three-week series on wisdom for different stages of life. 00:00:16.239 --> 00:00:21.519 Two weeks ago, we looked at what the book of Proverbs says as wisdom towards parents. 00:00:21.679 --> 00:00:25.679 And if you recall, basically what Proverbs says to parents is two things. 00:00:25.920 --> 00:00:30.480 Parents are supposed to instruct their children and they're supposed to discipline their children. 00:00:30.719 --> 00:00:35.759 Those are the two main headings that basically the rest of Proverbs towards parents fall under. 00:00:36.079 --> 00:00:40.799 Then last Lord's Day, we looked at Proverbs or wisdom towards teenagers. 00:00:40.960 --> 00:00:56.000 And Pastor Ryan explained to us that the main thrust of wisdom towards teenagers is to help teenagers understand the world is not all about them, to get their eyes off of themselves and onto ultimately the Lord, but onto those that are around them. 00:00:56.079 --> 00:00:59.359 And so to parents, you teach them to discipline and instruct your children. 00:00:59.600 --> 00:01:05.280 To teens, you teach them to get their eyes off of themselves and see the world around them and start to look at the Lord. 00:01:05.599 --> 00:01:10.879 This morning, we're going to look at wisdom towards children, towards younger children. 00:01:11.120 --> 00:01:16.959 But before we do that, I do want to give one more word to parents before we dive into wisdom towards children here. 00:01:17.200 --> 00:01:32.959 I think that much of kind of Christian parenting can have too much of a focus on, quote, getting your kids saved, so to speak, or on leading your kids to a point where they say the sinner's prayer or where they ask Jesus into their heart. 00:01:33.280 --> 00:01:38.319 And that can end up, I think, crippling parenting over the long term. 00:01:39.200 --> 00:01:44.480 It might surprise you to know the Bible has a lot to say about parenting. 00:01:44.799 --> 00:01:52.400 It has zero to say about teaching your children to pray a prayer after you or teaching your children to ask Jesus into their hearts. 00:01:52.480 --> 00:01:53.840 That is not biblical language. 00:01:53.920 --> 00:01:56.640 It's not the Bible's pattern for parenting. 00:01:57.599 --> 00:02:06.480 I think when you kind of structure parenting towards getting kids to make a decision for Jesus, and let's say that you have obedient kids, they make that decision at age five or whatever. 00:02:06.560 --> 00:02:07.920 I'm just throwing an age out there. 00:02:08.159 --> 00:02:13.120 They now, you're, you're undercutting the next 15 years of your relationship with them. 00:02:13.280 --> 00:02:21.520 The Bible has a lot to say about how you parent them from age five to, let's say, age 20, post-COVID world, age 20, 22, 24. 00:02:25.360 --> 00:02:30.639 The Bible has something bigger in mind than merely their salvation. 00:02:30.800 --> 00:02:34.240 Not something less in mind, but bigger in mind. 00:02:34.319 --> 00:02:50.960 And by the way, that approach to parenting of having the kids repeat a prayer after you at a young age and then telling them, you're a Christian now, you know, have assurance of your salvation if you prayed that prayer and meant it, can do long-term damage, I've experienced this as a pastor, it can do long-term damage in some kids' lives. 00:02:51.120 --> 00:02:59.439 I've had counseling situations with college kids, college seniors who are coming back from college, they haven't gone to church in four years, they have no evidence of salvation. 00:02:59.520 --> 00:03:01.599 They have no, if you ask them, do you love the Lord? 00:03:01.759 --> 00:03:03.039 The answer would be no. 00:03:03.759 --> 00:03:09.759 And I've had kids tell me, you know, my parents don't like that I'm questioning my salvation because they were there. 00:03:09.840 --> 00:03:12.319 They keep reminding me, they were there when I said the prayer. 00:03:12.719 --> 00:03:24.159 And it becomes a very convoluted situation where you have kids who know they don't love the Lord, but who have confidence in their salvation because of something they did when they were five. 00:03:24.240 --> 00:03:29.199 And that is just frankly not the biblical approach to parenting or to salvation. 00:03:29.759 --> 00:03:41.840 So I hope this morning a very simple, kind of bottom shelf message will help fill out for our thinking what the Bible actually says to young children. 00:03:42.080 --> 00:03:45.360 All right, so that's my intro to that. 00:03:46.800 --> 00:03:52.240 Kids believe me when I tell you the Bible has something to say to you. 00:03:52.639 --> 00:03:56.639 God, of course, wants every young child to come to faith. 00:03:56.879 --> 00:04:01.520 He wants young children to be to be Christians, to love Jesus. 00:04:01.759 --> 00:04:08.400 But the Bible says something more immediate to children than what happens to them when they die. 00:04:08.639 --> 00:04:12.560 The Bible has, what I said earlier, a bigger picture in mind. 00:04:12.879 --> 00:04:18.319 The Bible makes an appeal to young children to lead wise lives. 00:04:18.720 --> 00:04:22.240 When I say something more immediate than their salvation, that's what I'm talking about. 00:04:22.399 --> 00:04:42.000 When the Bible speaks to young children, especially Proverbs, the passage we just read, it's making an appeal to young children to learn to love wisdom, to have a life that is marked by loving the Lord and living in the world in a wise way. 00:04:42.720 --> 00:04:54.160 When the Bible speaks to children, it's less about what happens to them when they die and more about what kind of people they should be while they're living in this life. 00:04:54.399 --> 00:04:57.759 The Bible wants children to be wise. 00:04:58.639 --> 00:05:03.680 There's three main points in the passage we just read given to children about this. 00:05:03.839 --> 00:05:11.279 And the first is that kids need to understand that you are known by how you act. 00:05:11.839 --> 00:05:16.399 That's my appeal to any children that are here in this service that you would understand. 00:05:17.040 --> 00:05:19.279 You are known by how you act. 00:05:19.439 --> 00:05:26.959 People understand what kind of kid you are based upon your actions, based upon your conduct. 00:05:27.199 --> 00:05:39.199 People that don't even know you very well, they don't tuck you in at night, they don't live in your house, they can still be perceptive enough to know what kind of kids you are based upon your actions. 00:05:39.439 --> 00:05:41.519 When I say what kind of kid, this is what I mean. 00:05:41.680 --> 00:05:44.959 The Bible speaks to children in two categories. 00:05:45.199 --> 00:05:52.160 There's the wise kids and the foolish kids, there's the obedient kids and the disobedient kids. 00:05:53.279 --> 00:05:57.199 And it's not hard to discern which is which. 00:05:57.439 --> 00:06:00.399 Acts, uh Proverbs 20, verse 11 says it this way. 00:06:00.639 --> 00:06:08.000 Even a child makes himself known by his acts, whether his conduct is pure and upright. 00:06:08.160 --> 00:06:10.959 And that description of a child makes himself known. 00:06:11.120 --> 00:06:13.040 It's not something acted on the kid. 00:06:13.279 --> 00:06:28.240 The kid is acting himself in such a way from his own heart, his own actions, his own mouth, his own arms, his own legs, his own conduct is the advertisement to everybody around him of what kind of kid he is. 00:06:28.959 --> 00:06:33.839 And you can often tell right now in Virginia, it's warmer right now, the last few days. 00:06:34.160 --> 00:06:40.319 We have flowers and plants starting to grow in our front yard at this very moment. 00:06:41.839 --> 00:06:49.279 You can tell for the most part what kind of plant or flower it is based upon the very young leaves. 00:06:50.480 --> 00:06:57.920 You can tell what kind of tree a tree is going to be, even when it's a shrub, based upon how it's starting to grow. 00:06:58.240 --> 00:07:11.519 In fact, with fruit trees, you might put a wire basket around them, and I know this analogy works better in California than Virginia, but you might put a wire basket around a little tree, and the tree is going to grow into the shape of its basket. 00:07:12.800 --> 00:07:14.959 That's true with children. 00:07:15.279 --> 00:07:24.720 You can, in a sense, tell what kind of grown-up a child is going to be based upon the young leaves, based upon how the child is acting now. 00:07:25.920 --> 00:07:30.560 The child's conduct is the wire basket around himself. 00:07:30.879 --> 00:07:35.120 He makes himself known by how he behaves. 00:07:44.720 --> 00:07:53.120 A little kid who is disobedient and lying and fighting and being disruptive doesn't outgrow that when they grow older. 00:07:53.519 --> 00:07:57.360 In fact, their capacity to sin just grows bigger. 00:07:57.759 --> 00:08:02.560 Now we understand that every child has moments of good and bad. 00:08:02.639 --> 00:08:03.199 I mean, don't we? 00:08:03.279 --> 00:08:05.360 If you've been a parent for five minutes, you understand that. 00:08:05.600 --> 00:08:10.560 Good children misbehave, and bad children have moments of behaving. 00:08:10.879 --> 00:08:12.399 Both are true. 00:08:13.120 --> 00:08:18.639 And yet the fact that both are true doesn't make it unnecessarily complicated. 00:08:19.040 --> 00:08:26.000 If you're being honest, and this is the appeal to children, if you're being honest, you should be able to tell what kind of kids you are. 00:08:26.240 --> 00:08:32.720 Generally speaking, are you the kind of kid that is obedient or disobedient? 00:08:33.200 --> 00:08:35.679 Wise or foolish. 00:08:36.240 --> 00:08:39.200 You are known by how you act. 00:08:39.440 --> 00:08:42.080 And by the way, there's always hope. 00:08:42.320 --> 00:08:48.240 I said that children grow into the shape that they are in, but a child, you understand this. 00:08:48.559 --> 00:08:51.679 No child is born wise. 00:08:52.960 --> 00:09:02.879 No child by their own natural conduct, their own just left of themselves, would grow into the wise, a wise person. 00:09:03.440 --> 00:09:09.759 No acorn that falls is going to grow into the mighty oak tree that's described in the Psalm 1 if left by itself. 00:09:10.080 --> 00:09:21.840 So the first step towards growing in wisdom is for a child to look at his own conduct and recognize where he is sinning, recognize where he is being foolish, to see that. 00:09:21.919 --> 00:09:35.519 And a child who looks at himself and goes, Oh, I am being foolish in this way, I am being sinful in this way, there is so much more hope for that child than the one who is a rebellious child and who doesn't see it. 00:09:36.720 --> 00:09:42.399 That being said, it is still worth asking yourself, what kind of child are you? 00:09:42.559 --> 00:09:47.840 Secondly, first part of wisdom for kids is to know, to understand that you are known by how you act. 00:09:47.919 --> 00:09:52.879 The second component of this is to understand that sin has sad consequences. 00:09:53.120 --> 00:10:00.240 That's the second thing Proverbs wants young kids to know, that sin has very sad consequences. 00:10:00.480 --> 00:10:08.960 If your life continues down the road of sin and self-centeredness and disobedience and lying, it doesn't end well. 00:10:09.679 --> 00:10:12.000 Now it doesn't end well for your parents. 00:10:12.240 --> 00:10:20.159 The first sad consequence of this is grief or sadness, grief, sorrow in the hearts of the child's parents. 00:10:21.360 --> 00:10:24.480 Proverbs 17, 25 says it this way. 00:10:24.799 --> 00:10:33.600 A foolish son is a grief to his father, and bitterness to her who bore him, bitterness to his mother. 00:10:33.840 --> 00:10:38.000 There's a kind of sorrow that starts to rip the family apart. 00:10:39.039 --> 00:10:47.679 Because the parents want their kids to be godly, want their kids to be wise, and they're seeing in the child's life a lack of wisdom and a lack of godliness. 00:10:47.759 --> 00:10:55.120 And of course, a godly parent is going to keep praying for the disobedient child and begging the Lord to work in the child's heart. 00:10:55.200 --> 00:10:59.679 But as the child continues on his or her way, it just creates more and more grief. 00:10:59.759 --> 00:11:01.759 It's almost a magnifying grief. 00:11:01.919 --> 00:11:07.600 The more the parents are praying for the child, the more the child is rebelling, the more the grief is magnified. 00:11:09.120 --> 00:11:12.879 The child wants to do what he wants to do, he wants to live for himself. 00:11:13.039 --> 00:11:14.559 He's not concerned about his family. 00:11:14.639 --> 00:11:19.679 He's concerned about his own desires, his own lusts in his heart, the own ways he wants to live. 00:11:19.840 --> 00:11:26.960 He doesn't care if it hurts his family, and so that causes grief to his father and bitterness to his mother. 00:11:28.159 --> 00:11:31.440 That's why sin makes the family so sad. 00:11:32.639 --> 00:11:37.759 Because the parents don't want the children to be leading a foolish life, and so their hearts are saddened by it. 00:11:38.000 --> 00:11:40.000 That sadness produces shame. 00:11:40.799 --> 00:11:42.720 That sadness produces shame. 00:11:43.039 --> 00:11:51.440 As sin comes home and the the kids and the kids are rebelling, continuing to cause their parents grief, eventually it produces shame. 00:11:51.679 --> 00:11:57.440 Now, of course, no parent, no godly parent, would ever say, I'm ashamed of my child. 00:11:57.840 --> 00:11:58.720 Of course not. 00:11:59.279 --> 00:12:04.320 But sometimes the Bible speaks a truth that is too direct and too hard for people to say. 00:12:05.039 --> 00:12:08.240 And this is what the Bible says about this. 00:12:08.399 --> 00:12:15.519 He who does violence to his father and chases away his mother is a son who brings shame and reproach. 00:12:16.159 --> 00:12:20.000 Like I said, no parent would say, I'm ashamed of my child. 00:12:20.159 --> 00:12:28.399 But the child's conduct, the child's disobedience and sinning and foolishness brings shame into the home. 00:12:29.600 --> 00:12:32.240 It's a sad picture of recklessness. 00:12:33.039 --> 00:12:37.919 When a person worships an idol, they can't also worship God. 00:12:38.559 --> 00:12:40.399 You can worship lots of different idols. 00:12:40.559 --> 00:12:41.120 You know this, right? 00:12:41.279 --> 00:12:45.440 Idols kind of idols are okay with competition from other idols. 00:12:45.679 --> 00:12:52.399 The whole Greek system works with a whole bunch of Greek gods, the whole Roman pantheon of gods, they can all coexist. 00:12:52.480 --> 00:13:01.679 They might have their own petty rivalries and own petty uh fights and everything, but the system works based upon all of the gods coexisting. 00:13:02.240 --> 00:13:06.960 When you add the true God to the equation, the idols have to go. 00:13:07.360 --> 00:13:10.559 You cannot worship the true God and idols. 00:13:10.720 --> 00:13:11.840 Of course not. 00:13:12.240 --> 00:13:15.840 The same concept is true in the family. 00:13:17.120 --> 00:13:31.919 When children start living for themselves and living for themselves and refusing to pursue wisdom, refusing to repent from their sin, putting themselves forward, that's going to cause a rift in the family. 00:13:32.080 --> 00:13:40.879 It's described in the verse on your screen as you know, child children chasing away their father, driving away their mother. 00:13:41.120 --> 00:13:42.480 How does that actually happen? 00:13:42.639 --> 00:13:48.720 Well, the kid is pursuing sin, and the parents get to a point where they can no longer support the kid's sinful life. 00:13:48.879 --> 00:13:52.639 They can no longer support the choices their children are making. 00:13:52.960 --> 00:13:54.960 It causes a separation. 00:13:55.360 --> 00:13:59.120 That separation produces grief and shame. 00:13:59.919 --> 00:14:09.360 Of course, some parents will say, I don't approve of my kid's sinful life or what have you, but I'm not going to tell them that because I want to maintain the relationship. 00:14:09.440 --> 00:14:11.759 I want to maintain what we've got going on here. 00:14:12.320 --> 00:14:15.519 That's not, of course, ultimately going to work. 00:14:16.960 --> 00:14:21.519 Because as I mentioned, you can't worship the true God and idols at the same time. 00:14:21.840 --> 00:14:23.759 Eventually the bridge is going to be crossed. 00:14:23.919 --> 00:14:26.000 Eventually, choices are going to have to be made. 00:14:26.320 --> 00:14:28.720 And those choices bring grief. 00:14:29.120 --> 00:14:40.000 Of course, parents don't want to be driven away from your kids, but sinful kids that are living for themselves bring that kind of grief and shame to the house. 00:14:41.039 --> 00:14:42.799 Thirdly, it brings loss. 00:14:43.120 --> 00:14:45.759 Brings grief, shame, and thirdly, it brings loss. 00:14:46.639 --> 00:14:49.919 This is what the sinful, disobedient child is not thinking of. 00:14:50.080 --> 00:14:53.120 They're not projecting 30 years down the road. 00:14:53.679 --> 00:14:55.919 Like Proverbs is a very practical book. 00:14:56.080 --> 00:14:57.759 It even speaks at this level. 00:14:58.000 --> 00:15:02.000 What's going to happen to the parents' house when the parents die? 00:15:02.240 --> 00:15:03.759 Who gets the house? 00:15:04.080 --> 00:15:06.720 That's not what the rebellious teenager is thinking. 00:15:06.879 --> 00:15:13.360 The rebellious teenager is not, you know, extending this all the way down for 30 years from now, or 40 years from now, or 50 years from now when my parents die? 00:15:13.519 --> 00:15:14.320 Who gets the house? 00:15:14.399 --> 00:15:15.200 That's not what they're thinking. 00:15:15.279 --> 00:15:17.600 They're thinking I'm living for myself. 00:15:18.240 --> 00:15:21.519 My parents don't support me, so I'm going my own way. 00:15:21.679 --> 00:15:22.559 Forget them. 00:15:24.240 --> 00:15:26.559 What is going to happen when the parents die? 00:15:27.039 --> 00:15:28.559 Who does the house? 00:15:28.720 --> 00:15:30.240 Who does the resources? 00:15:30.399 --> 00:15:31.279 Who does the finances? 00:15:31.440 --> 00:15:33.679 Who does the legacy get passed down to? 00:15:34.480 --> 00:15:46.879 Proverbs 17, 2 says it this way: a servant who deals wisely will rule over a son who acts shamefully and will share the inheritance as if he were one of the brothers. 00:15:47.360 --> 00:15:49.600 In the Roman world, slaves are supposed to graduate. 00:15:49.840 --> 00:15:56.799 Slaves would be a slave for 10 or 20 years, and they go off into society with the social status of their previous owner. 00:15:57.279 --> 00:16:00.159 Kids don't graduate, they're always your kids. 00:16:01.519 --> 00:16:10.320 But when a kid pursues a disobedient and foolish and shameful life, it forces choices to be made. 00:16:10.639 --> 00:16:14.720 The kid graduates and goes off and leaves his family, creates separation. 00:16:15.279 --> 00:16:28.879 And the parents hand down the house to a slave, or to make it a more American analogy, the parents give the company or the business to the intern who's worked at it for twenty years because they trust him or they don't trust their kids. 00:16:29.039 --> 00:16:32.799 I just think of the kind of grief that's going to be in that kind of household. 00:16:33.120 --> 00:16:34.240 It's so sad. 00:16:35.039 --> 00:16:36.080 It's so sad. 00:16:37.120 --> 00:16:39.919 Such was the case of Moses' life, wasn't it? 00:16:40.480 --> 00:16:56.000 He was a slave who was brought into Pharaoh's house and was going to have the power of Pharaoh, or Joseph, another slave, brought into captivity, brought as a slave, but who elevated himself above Pharaoh's own children. 00:16:57.440 --> 00:17:00.159 Such sadness in the home when that happens. 00:17:00.320 --> 00:17:07.039 Jesus tells a story of the prodigal son, a story that I'm sure you're all familiar with, and but you may have forgotten some certain details of it. 00:17:07.279 --> 00:17:09.440 Do you remember the story begins? 00:17:09.519 --> 00:17:10.480 And it's a made-up story. 00:17:10.559 --> 00:17:13.359 It's a fictional story that Jesus is saying to make this point. 00:17:13.680 --> 00:17:20.720 But because it's in a different world than ours, we might lose some of the nuances that the original listeners would have understood. 00:17:20.880 --> 00:17:24.640 Remember, the prodigal son asks, Can I take half of my inheritance? 00:17:24.960 --> 00:17:26.079 Can I get my inheritance now? 00:17:26.480 --> 00:17:27.359 He had a brother. 00:17:27.519 --> 00:17:32.400 So he appeals to his parents, split the inheritance, cash me out now. 00:17:34.160 --> 00:17:36.079 Well, think about what's going to happen with those parents. 00:17:36.160 --> 00:17:36.480 They do it. 00:17:36.559 --> 00:17:37.119 They give it to him. 00:17:37.200 --> 00:17:38.960 They say, okay, half of what we have is yours. 00:17:39.119 --> 00:17:40.000 Go away. 00:17:40.240 --> 00:17:41.279 What sadness. 00:17:41.440 --> 00:17:45.440 But what the parents have with the other half of their stuff, it's going to continue to grow. 00:17:45.759 --> 00:17:47.599 It's going to continue to multiply. 00:17:47.759 --> 00:17:50.240 Their wealth is going to continue to come in. 00:17:50.480 --> 00:17:52.799 If they're farmers, they're going to continue to grow crops. 00:17:52.880 --> 00:17:54.480 They're continuing to grow the inheritance. 00:17:54.640 --> 00:17:56.240 The son has lost that. 00:17:57.920 --> 00:18:00.400 He's not going to get compounding interest. 00:18:00.880 --> 00:18:02.400 He's out of there. 00:18:03.680 --> 00:18:05.440 He's walked away. 00:18:06.079 --> 00:18:13.200 And do you remember at the end of the story when he comes back what he says is, I just want to be treated like one of the slaves. 00:18:13.440 --> 00:18:15.200 Let me be a slave. 00:18:15.839 --> 00:18:21.039 Such a heartache in a family that comes with that kind of loss. 00:18:21.839 --> 00:18:23.680 That's what sin does to a family. 00:18:24.079 --> 00:18:25.359 It brings grief. 00:18:25.599 --> 00:18:27.039 It brings sorrow. 00:18:27.599 --> 00:18:29.680 It brings ultimately loss. 00:18:30.319 --> 00:18:33.440 What a contrast with what wisdom brings to a family. 00:18:33.920 --> 00:18:36.319 Wisdom brings glad consequences. 00:18:36.559 --> 00:18:41.599 If sin brings sad consequences, wisdom brings glad consequences. 00:18:41.680 --> 00:18:43.759 And here is a massive contrast. 00:18:45.279 --> 00:18:53.039 The main point of what Scripture says to children is that you can grow in wisdom. 00:18:54.240 --> 00:19:06.319 If you're listening to me talk right now and you think, I think I'm a foolish child, listen, the child that thinks he's a foolish child is, I'm telling you, a hundred miles further down the road than the child who doesn't realize that. 00:19:07.759 --> 00:19:10.559 You can grow in wisdom. 00:19:11.440 --> 00:19:14.960 You don't have to be left in the childish foolishness. 00:19:15.200 --> 00:19:17.839 You can grow up in wisdom. 00:19:18.720 --> 00:19:20.960 Now there's three verses that talk about this. 00:19:21.039 --> 00:19:24.480 They're all in front of you in Proverbs 23, so you can look at them on the pages of your Bible. 00:19:24.559 --> 00:19:29.200 I'll put them on the screen for you as well, because I know some of the kids might not have Bibles in front of them. 00:19:29.279 --> 00:19:32.160 But Proverbs 23, verse 12, for example. 00:19:32.480 --> 00:19:37.200 Apply your heart to instruction and your ears towards words of knowledge. 00:19:37.359 --> 00:19:42.559 This is the main appeal of the Bible to little kids. 00:19:43.440 --> 00:19:50.480 Decide as a little child that you want to be listening to wisdom. 00:19:50.799 --> 00:19:53.359 You want to listen to your parents. 00:19:53.599 --> 00:19:57.359 You want your heart to be connected to the Lord. 00:19:57.440 --> 00:20:00.640 If you love the Lord with your heart, you're going to listen to your parents with your ears. 00:20:00.880 --> 00:20:04.079 Proverbs 23, verse 19, just a few verses down the page. 00:20:04.319 --> 00:20:07.519 Hear, my son, be wise. 00:20:07.920 --> 00:20:10.000 Direct your heart in the way. 00:20:10.160 --> 00:20:15.359 Notice the connection between the ear here for kids and the heart. 00:20:16.960 --> 00:20:26.559 The playground I took my kids to when they were younger than they are now is the one in the Pinecrest townhomes over there next to the Pinecrest golf course. 00:20:26.640 --> 00:20:28.400 There is a playground right there by the tennis courts. 00:20:28.559 --> 00:20:29.519 It's a fun playground. 00:20:29.599 --> 00:20:30.640 My kids loved it. 00:20:30.799 --> 00:20:38.799 It has one of those things that you speak into the cone and the pipe goes underground, underneath the whole playground, comes up the cone on the other side of the playgrounds. 00:20:38.880 --> 00:20:39.279 I love that. 00:20:39.440 --> 00:20:42.640 DJ and I would tell secrets to each other while they are playing on the playgrounds. 00:20:42.799 --> 00:20:46.079 It's like the only time we had for a conversation when they were younger. 00:20:48.799 --> 00:20:52.000 Your ear and your heart are like that. 00:20:52.160 --> 00:20:54.480 Your ear is connected to your heart. 00:20:55.599 --> 00:20:59.440 You listen to your parents because you love the Lord. 00:20:59.759 --> 00:21:03.200 As you love the Lord, you listen to your parents. 00:21:04.559 --> 00:21:08.480 God is not going to speak to you in a voice that you hear. 00:21:08.720 --> 00:21:11.359 You're not going to hear the Lord telling you something. 00:21:11.680 --> 00:21:17.519 If you're lying in your bed and you hear a voice and you think it's the Lord, it's probably the extra dessert you had last night. 00:21:19.920 --> 00:21:22.559 But you are going to hear your parents. 00:21:24.079 --> 00:21:27.519 Your heart is supposed to love the Lord. 00:21:28.160 --> 00:21:34.400 The more you love the Lord, the more you're going to listen to your parents. 00:21:34.640 --> 00:21:35.599 That's the connection. 00:21:35.759 --> 00:21:39.359 You hear them better when your heart loves the Lord. 00:21:39.519 --> 00:21:41.359 That's why Proverbs 23, verse 22. 00:21:41.599 --> 00:21:43.200 Again, just two verses down. 00:21:43.599 --> 00:21:45.920 Listen to your father who gave you life. 00:21:46.079 --> 00:21:47.920 Don't despise your mother when she's old. 00:21:48.000 --> 00:21:49.279 That's the appeal. 00:21:51.279 --> 00:21:54.720 Your parents want you to love wisdom. 00:21:55.279 --> 00:21:58.640 They want your heart to be directed to follow the Lord. 00:22:00.480 --> 00:22:04.960 You hear better when you have love for the Lord in your heart. 00:22:06.400 --> 00:22:12.319 If you have love for the Lord in your heart and an ear turned towards your parents, you can grow in wisdom. 00:22:12.400 --> 00:22:15.359 So don't despair now about your lack of wisdom. 00:22:15.440 --> 00:22:17.200 Don't despair now as if there's no hope. 00:22:17.279 --> 00:22:21.920 You say, I'm a sinful, disobedient, lying, fighting child. 00:22:22.079 --> 00:22:23.519 Don't despair at that moment. 00:22:23.680 --> 00:22:27.599 Instead, turn to the Lord in your heart and say, Lord, help me. 00:22:27.920 --> 00:22:28.640 Help me. 00:22:28.799 --> 00:22:33.359 And you desiring the Lord's help is going to lead to joy in your parents. 00:22:33.440 --> 00:22:38.160 That's one of the glad consequences of wisdom, it brings joy to the house. 00:22:39.599 --> 00:22:44.799 Parents take joy in their kids desiring wisdom. 00:22:44.960 --> 00:22:46.799 That makes them happy. 00:22:47.119 --> 00:22:52.240 That makes the house joyful, which is a very good goal to have in mind. 00:22:52.400 --> 00:23:01.599 You know, if you've been in a home that doesn't have joy, it's the you know, the family dinner table is supposed to be happy, and there's a cloud over it all the time because people are bringing their sins to the table. 00:23:01.680 --> 00:23:03.200 It makes a cloud there. 00:23:05.359 --> 00:23:10.880 When kids have a heart that wants to know wisdom, it brings joy to the home. 00:23:12.079 --> 00:23:20.240 Proverbs 23, 15, again on the page you're open to, says this my son, if your heart is wise, my heart also will be glad. 00:23:22.480 --> 00:23:29.839 This is the New Testament version of John saying, I have no greater love than seeing my children delight in the truth. 00:23:31.039 --> 00:23:32.720 It's the Old Testament wisdom. 00:23:32.880 --> 00:23:37.119 I just want my kids to know wisdom. 00:23:38.319 --> 00:23:43.680 Wisdom, if you remember what wisdom is in the Bible, wisdom is not about your grades. 00:23:44.319 --> 00:23:47.359 Wisdom is about understanding how God made the world. 00:23:47.759 --> 00:23:50.319 You know, if I drop something, it falls. 00:23:50.480 --> 00:23:51.839 I shouldn't be surprised. 00:23:52.079 --> 00:23:53.200 It does every time. 00:23:53.359 --> 00:23:54.400 That's wisdom. 00:23:54.720 --> 00:23:56.640 Folly is being surprised by that. 00:23:56.880 --> 00:24:01.039 Folly is hearing a dog bark and going, oh, I didn't know they made that sound. 00:24:01.839 --> 00:24:03.839 No, they always make that sound. 00:24:03.920 --> 00:24:04.720 That's wisdom. 00:24:04.960 --> 00:24:08.000 Folly is being surprised by it, wisdom is knowing it. 00:24:08.240 --> 00:24:17.599 When the book of Proverbs is speaking about morality in this world, it's saying that's what wisdom is, is knowing that the way God made the world makes things go well for you. 00:24:17.759 --> 00:24:20.720 It's swimming with the stream of how God made the world. 00:24:20.880 --> 00:24:24.240 It's easy to swim with the current, it's hard to swim against the current. 00:24:24.480 --> 00:24:29.279 Wisdom in Proverbs is understanding how God made the world and ordering your life that way. 00:24:29.359 --> 00:24:31.279 And it brings joy to your life. 00:24:31.519 --> 00:24:36.160 When you swim against the way God made the world, it brings sadness to your life. 00:24:36.480 --> 00:24:39.119 So a parent doesn't want their kids to be sad. 00:24:39.279 --> 00:24:41.599 A parent wants their kids to have joy. 00:24:41.839 --> 00:24:45.680 So they see how God made the world, they live in accordance with God's commands. 00:24:45.839 --> 00:24:50.319 It brings happiness to the parents because they see the happiness to the children. 00:24:52.319 --> 00:24:54.000 Proverbs 23, 24. 00:24:54.160 --> 00:24:56.880 What a just a wonderfully profound verse this is. 00:25:23.920 --> 00:25:28.160 And they think I'm lying sometimes because there's sometimes I do care about their grades, but you know what I mean. 00:25:28.400 --> 00:25:30.960 I ultimately don't care about their grades. 00:25:31.200 --> 00:25:37.119 And as much as their grades reflect their work ethic, I guess I care about it because their work ethic reflects their wisdom. 00:25:37.440 --> 00:25:40.559 But I honestly don't care. 00:25:41.359 --> 00:25:45.200 What I care about is if their heart loves wisdom. 00:25:45.519 --> 00:25:46.799 That I care about. 00:25:47.680 --> 00:25:51.440 And so it brings me joy to hear them, this kind of language right here. 00:25:51.599 --> 00:25:57.200 When the father, the righteous, hears his son saying wise things, it brings him so much joy. 00:25:57.519 --> 00:26:02.640 I guess it makes me happy when my daughter brings some of Spanish touch, she got an A on. 00:26:02.799 --> 00:26:03.599 Woo-hoo. 00:26:04.559 --> 00:26:11.680 But when I hear her saying something that reflects wisdom, oh, that brings me joy. 00:26:12.400 --> 00:26:15.200 This goes back to why God made the world. 00:26:15.920 --> 00:26:20.000 God made the world to reveal his glory in it. 00:26:20.880 --> 00:26:25.039 He made the world so his glory could be magnified through our lives. 00:26:25.920 --> 00:26:39.519 When a parent sees their children saying wise things, it brings joy to the parent because they see God's glory being magnified downstream. 00:26:39.680 --> 00:26:42.400 It's God made the world so we can display his glory. 00:26:42.640 --> 00:26:45.599 Parents have children so children can display God's glory. 00:26:45.759 --> 00:26:50.000 When you see your kids doing it, it multiplies the glory of the Lord. 00:26:50.240 --> 00:26:52.160 And that brings joy. 00:26:52.799 --> 00:26:53.920 That brings joy. 00:26:54.079 --> 00:26:56.319 This is why parents discipline their kids. 00:26:56.480 --> 00:26:57.839 We talked about this two weeks ago. 00:26:58.000 --> 00:26:58.960 Parents spank their kids. 00:26:59.039 --> 00:27:06.000 And when you spank your kids, you're telling them, speaking about the little kids here, you're telling them, you're sinning, and sin brings pain into the world. 00:27:06.079 --> 00:27:08.000 And you're learning that lesson right now. 00:27:08.319 --> 00:27:10.720 Wisdom, the instruction, is the flip side of that. 00:27:10.880 --> 00:27:17.759 When you're honoring the Lord, it brings so much joy into the world and into our home. 00:27:18.400 --> 00:27:20.720 God's glory is magnified that way. 00:27:20.880 --> 00:27:28.559 And wisdom brings the consequences of joy, brings the consequences of confidence, secondly. 00:27:28.880 --> 00:27:30.319 This is for the kid. 00:27:31.200 --> 00:27:35.920 Kids can have confidence in life when they have wisdom. 00:27:37.279 --> 00:27:42.319 It's hard for older people to understand this because so much of our life is behind us. 00:27:42.799 --> 00:27:47.759 Younger people are so prone to anxiety because they have so many unknowns. 00:27:48.240 --> 00:27:50.880 They don't know where they're going to go to school next year. 00:27:51.039 --> 00:27:53.039 They don't know where they're going to go to college. 00:27:53.200 --> 00:27:54.880 They don't know who they're going to marry. 00:27:54.960 --> 00:27:56.720 They don't know what kind of jobs they're going to have. 00:27:56.880 --> 00:27:58.799 They don't know any of that. 00:27:59.119 --> 00:28:02.799 Older people are like, like, that's all in the rearview mirror. 00:28:02.880 --> 00:28:08.160 Like, for better or worse, you sorted out the marriage thing a while ago, and you know, you're not. 00:28:08.559 --> 00:28:09.599 It happens. 00:28:10.640 --> 00:28:12.160 You know where you went to high school. 00:28:12.240 --> 00:28:13.279 You're not worried about it. 00:28:13.359 --> 00:28:14.480 You know where you went to college. 00:28:14.559 --> 00:28:16.000 You're not worried about it. 00:28:16.240 --> 00:28:21.440 So, just in the same way as older people, you understand, younger people don't know wisdom, they can't understand what I'm thinking. 00:28:21.519 --> 00:28:22.079 That's true. 00:28:22.319 --> 00:28:23.039 Flip it around. 00:28:23.200 --> 00:28:32.319 Older people have such a hard time understanding the ambiguity and the anxiety of the younger people because they don't know what's next for them. 00:28:33.119 --> 00:28:39.039 And the book of Proverbs says a young person who loves wisdom gains confidence from it. 00:28:39.440 --> 00:28:42.160 Verse 18 of the passage in front of you. 00:28:42.559 --> 00:28:46.960 Surely there is a future, and your hope will not be cut off. 00:28:47.440 --> 00:28:53.039 When you love wisdom, you know God is going to do something good in your life. 00:28:53.279 --> 00:28:56.240 That all things happen for his glory and for your good. 00:28:56.400 --> 00:29:02.880 When you love wisdom, you believe that and you embrace it, and that gives you confidence that cannot be shaken. 00:29:03.039 --> 00:29:07.839 Elsewhere, the Bible says that that kind of hope does not disappoint. 00:29:08.400 --> 00:29:18.240 Your parents can disappoint you, your brothers and sisters can disappoint you, but your confidence from loving wisdom will never disappoint you. 00:29:19.359 --> 00:29:21.680 Your dad can lose his job. 00:29:22.240 --> 00:29:24.480 Your parents can get a divorce. 00:29:24.799 --> 00:29:26.960 You can get bad grades in the school. 00:29:27.119 --> 00:29:28.000 And you know what? 00:29:28.160 --> 00:29:32.160 If you love wisdom, you can have confidence in your future. 00:29:33.599 --> 00:29:36.799 In our Northern Virginia world, your friends can move away. 00:29:37.119 --> 00:29:39.119 Your friends can move away. 00:29:40.400 --> 00:29:43.359 And you can still have confidence in the future. 00:29:43.680 --> 00:29:45.440 I talked to a family this morning. 00:29:49.119 --> 00:29:50.400 You know what's in Jordan. 00:29:50.960 --> 00:29:51.759 But you know what? 00:29:51.920 --> 00:29:54.960 If you love wisdom, you can have confidence in what's in Jordan. 00:29:55.200 --> 00:29:58.640 You can have confidence in the Lord's goodness and kindness towards you there. 00:29:59.119 --> 00:30:03.039 At every stage of life, you can have confidence. 00:30:03.440 --> 00:30:09.359 The child who loves wisdom loves the confidence he has in the future. 00:30:09.599 --> 00:30:13.200 So to recap, wisdom for kids. 00:30:13.359 --> 00:30:19.200 First of all, understand what kind of kid you are is obvious to everybody. 00:30:19.759 --> 00:30:23.200 Even if you decide not to think about it, everybody knows. 00:30:23.759 --> 00:30:30.960 Secondly, sin makes your life sad, it makes your parents' life sad, it brings sad consequences. 00:30:31.279 --> 00:30:35.680 But wisdom brings glad consequences into the home. 00:30:36.000 --> 00:30:39.519 It brings confidence to you and joy to your parents. 00:30:39.920 --> 00:30:47.839 Now, to expand a little bit, I know most of you, again, at this 9:30 service, union station is going on, very few little kids here. 00:30:49.839 --> 00:30:56.480 For most of the rest of us, do you understand how these points are also true for you? 00:30:56.640 --> 00:30:58.640 It's not a long walk. 00:30:59.519 --> 00:31:01.039 You are children of the Lord. 00:31:01.200 --> 00:31:02.960 These points are true of you. 00:31:03.200 --> 00:31:07.519 You, what kind of person you are is so evident based on your conduct. 00:31:07.680 --> 00:31:12.559 When Solomon says it's true even of a child's, he means it's more true of you. 00:31:14.240 --> 00:31:17.839 It's easier to identify the apple tree when it's full grown. 00:31:19.599 --> 00:31:29.680 If you say you love the light, but you walk in the darkness, you are a liar, and the truth is not in you, and everybody knows it. 00:31:31.279 --> 00:31:35.039 Perfect love drives out fear. 00:31:38.400 --> 00:31:42.160 Sin can wreck your life at any stage. 00:31:42.319 --> 00:31:51.200 It can ruin your family, it can cause heartache in your home, you can lose your job, you can lose your integrity, it can devastate all you've worked for your whole life. 00:31:51.440 --> 00:31:58.480 But wisdom can give such joy and such confidence and such just security at any age. 00:31:59.599 --> 00:32:01.039 At any age. 00:32:03.039 --> 00:32:08.559 Therefore, two just basic takeaways from all this for every age of person. 00:32:08.720 --> 00:32:10.400 They're buried in verse 17. 00:32:10.640 --> 00:32:15.519 But I hope verse 17 jumps out at you now, kind of the center of this parenting section. 00:32:17.039 --> 00:32:18.880 Don't envy sinners. 00:32:19.759 --> 00:32:21.279 Don't envy sinners. 00:32:21.759 --> 00:32:22.720 That's true of kids. 00:32:22.880 --> 00:32:24.720 You know how kids are tempted to envy sinners. 00:32:24.960 --> 00:32:31.599 You know, my non-Christian neighbor, he gets to watch these movies, he gets to play these games, he gets to stay up at night, he gets to do all these things. 00:32:31.680 --> 00:32:34.799