The Grounded CEO
So many entrepreneurs and leaders are carrying pressure no one sees. They are growing businesses, managing teams, raising families, navigating relationships, making money decisions, holding communities — and still trying to become the fullest version of themselves.
From the outside, they look capable. Inside, they may be exhausted, disconnected, overextended, or quietly wondering how long they can keep moving this way.
The Grounded CEO exists because what happens inside the entrepreneur does not stay inside the entrepreneur. It affects the business. It affects the team. It affects the body. It affects the relationships. It affects the home.
This show creates space for the conversations most leadership rooms skip — the ones about grief, capacity, control, loss, faith, ambition, rest, empathy, identity, and the inner work required to build something that can actually last.
The Grounded CEO
What Does It Mean To Be A Grounded CEO?
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Welcome to the very first episode of The Grounded CEO.
Most leadership advice starts with strategy. This show starts somewhere else — with the mind, the body, and the spirit of the person running the business.
In this premiere, host Shayna Renee sits down with three women who each carry one piece of that foundation. Cantiese Burrell brings the mind. Kelly Johnson brings the body. Ticki Favaroth brings the spirit. Together they answer the question the whole season is built on: what does it actually mean to be grounded as a CEO?
The conversation moves through all four parts of RISE — reveal the truth, intend to heal, sync with rhythm, and embody love.
You'll hear:
- Why grounding isn't a one-time achievement, and why every new level of growth requires a new pot, new soil, and a willingness to let some things fall away
- The four practices Ticki has used for a decade to tell the difference between her own strategy and what God is actually saying, including her annual three-day planning retreat and her yearly month-long sabbatical
- Kelly's story of entering somatic work to save her marriage, and what she found instead
- Why high-achieving leaders so often carry unprocessed trauma, and how the nervous system quietly runs your decisions before strategy ever gets a vote
- How to do a body scan, why the hips hold grief, and what to do when your body speaks and you don't yet know the language
- Cantiese on why you don't have to excavate your entire past to heal — you just have to clean up the wreckage, starting with your triggers
- The difference between boundaries as a wall and boundaries as a front door
- Where love and accountability collide in leadership, and what it cost Ticki to lead with love without protecting the whole ecosystem
- Why three minutes of putting yourself first is a legitimate place to begin
If you've built something that looks good on paper but doesn't feel good in your body, this one is for you.
GUESTS
Cantiese Burrell — Licensed clinical social worker, empowerment leader, and founder of Living My Worth. For more than 20 years she has helped Black women tell the truth, heal, and reclaim their worth. Ask her about the Me Moment book.
https://livingmyworth.com
Instagram / Facebook / LinkedIn: Cantiese Burrell | Living My Worth
Kelly Johnson — Senior HR professional and trauma-informed somatic coach. Her work helps leaders understand what the body has been holding, what the nervous system has been carrying, and what it means to lead in an embodied way.
https://kellynicolecoaching.com
LinkedIn: Kelly Johnson
Ticki Favaroth — Faith-driven CEO, strategist, founder, and legacy builder whose work sits at the intersection of business, purpose, excellence, and spiritual discernment.
https://www.hrandco.com (human capital practice)
https://www.tickifavaroth.com (wisdom table practice)
ABOUT THE SHOW
The Grounded CEO is a Zerlo Network original. Being a grounded CEO isn't a title — it's a practice. The practice of telling the truth sooner, healing with intention, honoring your rhythm, listening to your body, trusting your spirit, and embodying love in the way you lead, build, decide, rest, repair, and rise.
This season sits inside the real tensions entrepreneurs face: the endings, the pivots, the grief, the pressure, the relationships, the family decisions, the empathy, the faith, and the success that looks good on paper but doesn't always feel good in your body.
DISCLAIMER
Before we close, a gentle note: the conversations on The Grounded CEO are here to educate, inspire, and open up meaningful reflection. We talk about healing, leadership, mental health, relationships, and growth, but this show is not therapy and should not replace care from a licensed mental health professional.
I'm an executive leadership coach, not a licensed therapist. This podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. So please take what supports you, honor what comes up, and reach out for professional care if you need it.
I'll see you in the next episode. Thank you for being part of this conversation.
Watch The Grounded CEO and every Zerlo Network favorite on demand, anytime. Download the free Zerlo Network TV app on Roku or Amazon Fire TV. Zerlo Network is streaming 24/7, ready to help you make it possible.
Before we begin, I want to welcome you into something that feels bigger than a conversation. This is the first episode of The Grounded CEO. And I know with everything in me that this is a divine assignment. This was not something I planned my way into. It was something that kept meeting me in prayer, in my spirit, and in those quiet moments when God knew he was asking me to move. So I said yes. And now my job is to keep listening, keep following, and trust that this work is meant to reach the people who need it. And because this is our first episode, I wanted to start with the foundation. What does it actually mean to be a grounded CEO? The mindset matters. The nervous system matters. The body matters. The spirit matters. The inner work matters. So today, we are going to look at grounded leadership through the mind, body, and spirit. We will reveal the truth, we will intend to heal, we will sync with rhythm, and we will embody love. We will rise. She is a licensed clinical social worker, empowerment leader, founder of Living My Worth, and someone who has spent more than 20 years helping black women tell the truth, heal, and reclaim their worth. We also have with us Kelly Johnson. She is bringing the body. She is a senior HR professional and trauma-informed somatic coach whose work helps people understand what the body has been holding and what the nervous system has been carrying and what it means to lead in an embodied way. And finally, we have Tiki Faiteroff, who is bringing the spirit. She is a faith-driven CEO, strategist, founder, and legacy builder whose work sits at the intersection of business, purpose, excellence, and spiritual discernment. Together, we are gonna sit with the question: what does it mean to be a grounded CEO? So let's get into it. When you hear the phrase grounded CEO, what comes to mind? We'll start with you, Kenties.
SPEAKER_06So the first thing that comes to my mind, uh, first of all, I love the word grounded. Um it really means um not just living life from what will be, but being able to really uh settle in to each moment uh to enjoy uh what we are creating. So it really means being able to actually not just create or be successful, but to be grounded in what it really means to experience that.
SPEAKER_04I love that. Yeah. Especially that last word that you said, experience. Yeah. Even your the pacing at which you were, you know, describing a grounded CEO. I mean, I felt grounded as you were describing it. You know, the pace is more even, it's more calm. Thank you for that. Tiki, what does it mean for you?
SPEAKER_02So, first of all, congratulations. I am very um humbled that you would put something together to think about the mind, the body, and the spirit of others. So when I think about being a grounded CEO, I think about roots and always say, you know, what in the kingdom are you doing with your business? Being grounded as a CEO, with many things that are coming at you, you have to know your who, your what, your when, and your why. And once you know that, it's obviously taking that to Abba Father to connect with what his plan and purpose is for you, what he wants to do in the kingdom through your business, and to begin to steward all of the talents, the skills, the knowledge, the relationships, the financials in order to move those objective for uh objectives forward. But I also think, you know, being a grounded CEO, individuals need to realize that it's one thing to lead on teams. It's one thing to lead in other organizations. It's another thing to lead your organization from start to growth mode. And so grounding yourself at different layers of success. When I first started my business as a solopreneur, just exiting corporate, I had so much uh tapestry of what I had learned. But as I scaled that business and went from this and from two employees to 15 from this revenue to these types of clients, at every stage I had to reset. It's kind of like a plant. When you first pot it, it's a little bud. And as that plant grows, you need new fertilizer, you need a new pot. Sometimes you have to clip it back so it stays within the confound so that it continues to evolve and grow. And as the leaves die or fall off, recommends uh recognize that sometimes being grounded means that some things will fall away. So for me, being a grounded CEO is starting with your why, getting confirmation from Abba Father in your why, and then be willing to till the soil or the seasons or where you are as that business grows. And so I think that's the base uh and the foundation.
SPEAKER_04I love that analogy. Thank you for that. Yes, yes. And as you heard that, Kelly, um, I'd love to hear from your perspective, especially focusing on the body. When you hear grounded CEO, what comes to mind for you?
SPEAKER_01I love the diversity of these responses. Um when I think of a grounded CEO, I really think of someone who can stay connected to themselves, their body, while exploring with curiosity. So when leaders listen to their bodies, they gain access to information, wisdom, that spreadsheets and data and analysis you know really can't provide. So the body is not separate from grounded leadership. It's actually one of the most important aspects of being a leader.
SPEAKER_04Oh, I cannot agree more. Thank you for that. So, you know, to think about the grounded CEO or thinking about that connection that Tiki talked about, that connection with spirit, and making sure you're clear on your why and also confirming that you heard correctly. And then bringing in the body and of course starting with the mind. So I'm gonna come back to the mind, Canties. Let's come back. Because, you know, as entrepreneurs, we've all heard that mindset is such a big part of leading our businesses, right? We can have an excellent strategy, we can have all the tools, but if we don't have the correct mindset, the strategy just kind of goes awry. So, you know, help us understand, you know, when it comes to building self-awareness and shifting mindset, what would you, where would you begin? Where would you, how do you guide your entrepreneurs, your leaders that you work with that really struggle with mindset?
SPEAKER_06Well, you know, one of the things that I encourage uh people to do, um, especially around like how we practice like self-care and how we practice um our uh I say, are we caring for ourselves or taking care of ourselves? And so I encourage there to be a thought about not just uh to Kelly's point, not just what's going on on the outside of us, but what's going on in the inside of us. And I encourage people to know that mental health is health. There are several different systems in the body, and our nervous system, our mind, our thoughts is a part of that. And so giving attention to that, where I have people start is making sure that they find stillness, that they find time to actually throughout the day, because listen, I live by my calendar, and it's like this, that, the other. But finding a moment to really truly check in with yourself to understand what is happening on internally is very important, even if it's it's not uh quantity, but it's quality, right? So being able to um not just take care of other people, but to understand what it is that I may be dealing with or needing for myself and finding a way to check in.
SPEAKER_04So I'm hearing the the importance of really giving yourself permission to put yourself first. Yes. Doesn't matter how long, yes, just making sure it's consistent. Yes, consistently putting yourself first. Yes, absolutely. Okay. So, Tiki, I'd love to hear because you have beautiful practices around how to make sure you're in alignment, divine alignment as you're moving throughout your business. Um, how do you also discern between strategy and what God is telling you to do? Yeah, how do you make that determination?
SPEAKER_02Some days it's not always clear. So um maybe about 10 years ago, I started doing four significant things that at least if I consistently do it, I can tell the ebbs and flow. So thing number one, every year at the end of the year, the beginning of the year, I take three days and I do a strategic planning session with myself. This is where I pull off the plan from last year. I do brainstorming of what the future year will look like in relationship to my 20-year plan. This is the big picture, you know, five years this year. And so I'm always refreshing to re-anchor myself. And did I do what I said? What were the barriers? What were the successes and what came out of nowhere?
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_02Number two, um, every morning, or at least once a week, I have what's called a strategy meeting with my head CEO, which is the father. And I say, Lord, this this week, this is what we're doing, this is what I have on my agenda, this is what I think you said. I'm looking for my destiny helpers, I'm looking where you're moving things around, and I stay present. You know, this season has been about me being what I call inside and watching the miraculous happen, not striving, not going, like it's just falling there. The third thing is that about mid-year, I'm willing to check in with close friends. Okay, sis, give me some feedback. How am I showing up? You know, or if someone says, Oh, you look stressed or whatever, and then taking those times. And then about four years ago, I started an annual sabbatical, which I take off a whole month of the year to just rest and kind of set. So I think that it's like, what in the kingdom are you doing with your business? One, having a long-term Habekah, to write the vision, make it plain, and so that you run towards it and tarry and wait for it, doing those frequent check-ins because God moves sometimes. He may be saying, use this person, and then they did something. He's like, Uh, I can't use them, let's go this way.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And then always taking a time to take your hands off of it because you're in control. I struggle with that. Okay. Because I'm a A-type, get or done, and finding those moments where I kind of unplug and then re-plug in. And so the final part is sometimes you know, but sometimes you don't. And that's what trust and faith is. If he gives you an impression, like, well, I think you said this, this is where I'm going, go in good cheer. Check your heart posture. Is it pride? Is it greed? Is it gluttony? And then move. And when you see certain things happen, either confirmation or redirection, be still in that so that you know that the the scripture says there's a little voice over your shoulder that'll say, go this way, and so you'll know which way to go.
SPEAKER_04So those are just my thoughts. What I connect between the two of you is the importance of being really intentional about mindfulness. Yes. Both of you talked about, you know, it's not necessarily the quantity, but it is about the quality. Yes. Right? And making sure that you're checking in. Um, I loved Tiki how you said, you know, when you might not be sure, that gap between assuredness, that's when faith steps in, that's when trust steps in. And it's okay to ask again.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_04Um if you need to ask again, however many times you need to ask, you ask again. So thank you so much for that. As you are watching, I invite you to ask yourself, what truth have I been managing instead of naming? Not fixing, not judging, just naming. Because sometimes the most loving thing you can do is stop pretending you do not know. Coming up, we move from truth into healing. Because once you name what is real, the next question becomes: what are you willing to heal so your business, your leadership, your relationships, and your life are no longer built on survival? If you're enjoying these conversations on the grounded CEO, I want to personally invite you into the grounded lounge. Much like this show, the lounge is a weekly virtual space where black entrepreneurs and leaders can grow, heal, and rise in community. Each week, we gather for grounded coaching, honest conversation, practical tools, and the kind of support that helps you build without losing yourself. Your next level needs more than strategy and needs a more grounded youth. Join us inside the Grounded Lounge. Healing is deciding that what happened to you does not get to keep leading your business, your relationships, your money decisions, your calendar, your boundaries, and definitely not your sense of worth. And let's be clear, healing does not mean you stop being ambitious. It means your ambition no longer has to be powered by pain. So let's get into it. You know what? I'm gonna put these cards down because we need to, we need to really get into it. Okay. So, Cantisse, you work with a lot of high-achieving leaders and entrepreneurs and professionals who seem like they have it all together, right? They know how to fake it until you make it, they know how to, you know, don't let them see you sweat, right? So, for those folks who have been operating that like that for so so long, how do you get them to come back home to who they really are and trust that person in the business?
SPEAKER_06Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_06So I say taking care of you first is actually taking care of business. So, like, um, it's counterintuitive. We are really like into what we do, and I can have to be careful of that myself. Like the all the doing and doing and doing, and we're we often forget about like who we are and um really allowing like the being of us to inform uh why we do what we do. And we're we do that because we want to have a life, we want to have success, we want to accomplish things. But the the truth is is that if you're so tired that you can't enjoy what it is you're creating, that's a telltale sign. So the first place I look is what type of support do you have? When is the last time you took time off? If it or or time to uh just stop and smell the roses or do something that doesn't have anything to do with productivity. Okay. So I look for those places and those little pieces, and usually that's where I find the golden nugget. Like, okay, what what are you doing with your time? Right. Really doing with your time. Really doing with your time. Is it all about um serving and is it all about giving or climbing the ladder? Or is there a space where you get to do something like playing, you know, like uh having fun that doesn't uh require uh you to have to, you know, check a box. Got it.
SPEAKER_04Got it. Makes a lot of sense. So, Kelly, I'm gonna kick it to you because as I was listening to Cantis and I was listening to just kind of how the healing journey can look for people, it reminds me of your story and your story of how you were trying to answer a really big question, and it took you on your own personal healing journey, which then led to now you doing healing work for others. So, talk to us about that very specific thing you were looking to heal for yourself that led to a completely different business.
SPEAKER_01I got into this work because I was trying to fix my marriage, and during our um a period of our marriage where I didn't feel like my needs were being met, I wasn't feeling seen or heard in the relationship. We tried therapist, mini therapist, and that wasn't working until I just started to research options. Like maybe here's the thinking. I thought being someone who facilitated trainings, being someone who was comfortable speaking in front of large audiences, I could learn something about how to fix my marriage so my husband would feel safe because he wasn't comfortable with counseling, he wasn't comfortable with therapy. And I'd identified a particular organization that focused on somatic relationship and intimacy um training. And so I started doing that work and found it really interesting and discovered so much about myself in the process, and the agreement was I would take that back home and share with my husband so we could learn and grow together, and that didn't really work. Um, what I discovered in that process is I learned so much about my wounds, my hurts, my unprocessed trauma. Because, as all of you know, before we can do this work on other people, you really have to do this work on yourself, right?
SPEAKER_04It is, absolutely. Yes.
SPEAKER_01And I dived right into it, not having a huge awareness around that. And it came for me. I was then forced to like feel feelings. That wasn't something I was really comfortable with. Um, feeling the feelings. I was really interested in doing the work. I was someone who wanted fast growth, had a lot of growing edges, right? Um, and what I what it eventually did was it probably took us further apart than it brought us together. Somatic work is really about focusing on what's inside the body, right? It's body work. It can refer to like practices and approaches that really focus on movement and the felt and lived experience. And in marriage, two people have to be willing to. Do that.
SPEAKER_04They do.
SPEAKER_01Not just one.
SPEAKER_04Thank you so much for sharing so fully. Right? Because I love how you said it came for you. And I think for some people, I know for myself included, sometimes we delay healing because we're afraid of what we might find out on the other side. You went in with a very specific intention and a desired outcome. And your desired outcome was something very different. But it also sounds like it was also freeing. So thank you so much for sharing that. So Tiki, that makes me think of you. And it makes me think of you because you have been so successful for so long. I mean, your work spans entrepreneurship, corporate, nonprofit sectors, legacy. So many leaders and entrepreneurs look up to you. And so when you think about different seasons of healing, what has that looked like for you in the past? And most importantly, what does healing look like for you now?
SPEAKER_02Wow, that's a very big word. Because I think sometimes people don't even know that they need to be healed. And I would say, you know, for myself, I had to find the fact that I am chosen. There's certain trials and testing that I must go through. And so healing started with accepting, because there was a plan and purpose for me, that there are certain things that I need to be overcome to be the light in the world. And I know that's very hard for people to grasp. And so when I think about healing, for me, it's very simple. What is the lie versus the truth? What is the lie versus the truth? And I go back now when I look at places where I was in battle, I sometimes say, I was I was in jail, like Paul and Silas until I did all the things. But understanding the very thing that keeps trapping me is the very thing that I'm called to. And I, in order to be a real leader, I must have conviction and experience. There's not a billionaire, a person's not a billionaire that can tell me how to make billions. I can't tell you how to heal or how to make your first millions or how to term someone on your team or how to let go. If I have an experience and have that light inside of me. Final example. I think about healing, and one of the things I had to do is heal my ear, people I listen to. Just this week we were talking and we were just chopping it up about something, and I was sharing, and you was like, oh, I hear this word. Um, simplify. But because I've healed my ear, I can hear the difference between love versus condemnation versus agitation. And we went in on simplify. And so I would say healing is telling what is the lie, going through that plan and finding the truth. And even if you don't live up to that truth today, you know where you are falling short so that you can make the changes to move forward. And that's just the very simplicity. Yeah, the only way I can say it. And I haven't always done it good or right because I didn't know, but now that I know, it's like even this morning, it was just so much. But I'll share more about that with you later.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. So I love how you said what's trapping us is likely that very thing that we need to tell the truth about. Yeah. And something that I've grown to, you know, understand through entrepreneurship is that whenever I feel like I hit that plateau, that place where, you know, my revenue is the same year over year, there's some nervous system capacity work I have to do. There's some sort of hidden fear that maybe I'm not confronting, I'm not paying attention to. So, Cantis, I'm curious, you know, what does nervous system capacity look like in your world in terms of therapy?
SPEAKER_06Yeah, I think that's a really good question. And one thing that I want to note is that many times people that are in high-prior leadership roles, entrepreneurs, there is it's kind of a weird uh kind of a anomaly where a lot of times those individuals, people like us, we have some type of trauma in our background, right? And that trauma is what sort of impacts how our nervous system works. And um, you know, what we what we talk about and what we make sure that people know is the polyvagal theory, um, not to get too science-y, but it explains like how our parasympathetic and our sympathetic nervous system works. And that's responsible for how we regulate ourselves. And a lot of times what you talked about, that fear, it uh ticks up because we start to get into a place where we are not sure if our survival is at stake. And that's kind of how we relate to what happens with our business, right? It's it's closely connected to not just, you know, like a person who works somewhere and they may be getting a paycheck. It's closely uh connected to who we are, um, to how we see ourselves, as well as our livelihood. And so when we get into fear, what happens is our prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for us being creative and connecting with people and making decisions and all of those things, when we start to feel like our survival is at stake, then that fear creeps in. And now we are like, oh my God, I can't think, I can't problem solve, and my relationships may be in flux. And so that's why, you know, it's really important when I'm working with uh a CEO, an entrepreneur, that we really look at, okay, what's back there in terms of trauma or ways that maybe our nervous system is getting in the way and um finding a way to uh to start to build some coping, some resilience, and some support around that.
SPEAKER_03Got it, got it.
SPEAKER_04So hearing you makes me think, you know, it kind of debunks the myth that we can compartmentalize our lives, right? That we can kind of leave home at home, put on a good face, yeah, and go run our business. Yeah, right? Because that's still running over and over. So, Kelly, I have a quick question for you. So, how do you support people in also gaining a little bit more information from their body about their trauma? Because what if I don't know that there's a certain trauma I haven't completely healed yet? I don't really consciously know that that's happening, how can I tap into my body to gain more wisdom?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, the nervous system is like over 600 million years old, right? So evolutionary information is stored there. Right. So we really do need to take a look at the nervous system and prioritize it. Because before there is strategy, you know, there is a state that the nervous system influences. So how we interpret information, how we handle conflict, how we communicate. So when I am working with a client, that is my baseline is to understand what who is speaking to me. Is it coming from a wound or is it coming from self-leadership, right?
SPEAKER_05Yes, okay.
SPEAKER_01So based on some of the trainings I've done around internal family systems, parts work, and nonviolent communication, I can pretty much tell who's talking to me, right? Is it a wounded child? Yeah, is it criticism? Is it judgment?
SPEAKER_06Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Um, it's rarely self-leadership when we're in a dysregulated nervous state, right? Rarely. Um, so the first thing I have to do is understand which state they're in. Um so we can typically tell which state you're in by the language you're using, by the behaviors of your body. And I always try to get my clients to like pause and tell me what you're feeling. And if they don't know what they're feeling, then they're not connected to their body.
SPEAKER_04So then we have to do a scan. That was beautiful, Kelly. I want to make sure that we get that body scan, and so we're gonna save that for the next segment, okay? So for right now, I want everyone watching to take a moment and finish this sentence. The part of me that has been leading from survival is trying to protect me from. And now this next sentence, the part of me that is ready to lead from healing wants me to know. That is where the work begins. Stay connected to the grounded CEO and every Zerlo Network favorite, on demand anytime you like. Download the free Zerlo Network TV app on Roku or Amazon Fire TV. Zerlo Network is streaming 24-7, ready to help you make it possible. Welcome back to the grounded CEO. We have revealed the truth, we have talked about the intention to heal. Now we are moving into the third part of Rise, which is sync with rhythm. This is where a lot of entrepreneurs get challenged because many of us were taught to override rhythm. But a grounded business cannot be built on a disconnected body, a dysregulated nervous system, or a spirit that never gets quiet enough to listen. Rhythm asks a better question. What season am I in? And what is actually required now? So, Kelly, let's get back into it. Right before the break, you started to really tell us a practice that we could all do that would really help us get back in rhythm. So tell us about a body scan and and how that all works and how that supports us.
SPEAKER_01Definitely. So scanning the body requires us to really pause and listen to what the signals, the messages that our body is trying to communicate to us. Our body is brilliant, it is a masterpiece. We just have to be willing to stop and be still long enough to listen what it's trying to communicate. So when we scan our body, we really are focusing internally. And I guarantee you, if you practice this, if you're willing to sit still long enough, your body will speak to you. You will either hear it, you will feel it, and sensations and tingling and buzzing and fluttering in different parts of your body. And because wounds, hurt, trauma are stored in our body, it is it usually has a very distinct message about what we're experiencing. So it's important to think about the pains, the distress, the discomfort that we experience in our bodies. So I want you to just imagine like where we hold all of our grief. Hips, we store our grief in our hips. Think about it. Hips are our largest muscle group and our psoas, which are connected to our legs, really does hold a lot of our unprocessed grief around responsibility, around um woundings that we just never got a chance to process. So if we pause long enough to really focus on what the body is saying, it does give us an opportunity to help us complete the stress cycle.
SPEAKER_04And that makes me think of so if I notice and I gain the noticing that I have tension in my hips, and now I'm realizing I'm in grief, right? I'm in a state of grief. I may not necessarily know what I'm grieving, and I guess does it matter that I know what I'm grieving or not? You may not know it right away. Okay.
SPEAKER_01Um, and you may need the help of, you know, an experienced therapist to help guide you through it. Okay. I will speak for an example, a personal example. How about that? Would that be okay?
SPEAKER_04Yes, of course.
SPEAKER_01Okay, so one of my wounds was around responsibility. I had a lot of responsibility as a young child throughout my life. Um, so if you imagine that movement between fight, flight, and freeze gets paused, right, when we are experiencing an overwhelming impact to our nervous system, we brace. Like we brace, and then that the hips hold all that unprocessed grief. And it really is a reminder of our unmet needs, right? The weight of things that we never let ourselves mourn. So I would experience extreme, and you heard me say this, my body would just feel so heavy and so dense.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And I experienced a lot of hip problems and lower back problems. And it wasn't until I did IFS parts work that I was able to identify a really young nonverbal part of me that was in distress. Or locked, you know, alone in a quiet dark room, not being able to get her needs met. Wow. And one of the things that I experienced is a great relief and a light lightness after that experience, after that healing, and after that integration of that young part of me.
SPEAKER_04That's a beautiful awareness to have. And so, Cantise, I'm curious. When someone comes to you with this level of awareness, right, they know where their grief is, they have an inkling of where it's coming from, they know how it's showing up in their body. And so, what's the next step in terms of daily practices maybe that they can do? What do they do with that information?
SPEAKER_06Yeah, I think that's a really important question. And I and I love um this uh share, um, Kelly. I just really um I think it's important. I I I want to just add one thing to answer your question, and that is um we have emotional memories that may or may not be connected to a specific um event. And so uh I think in times past, sometimes people don't want to go to therapy because they're like, oh Lord, now I gotta talk about the past and what grandma did or what or whatever. And that's actually not necessary. So what I tell people is that um what we need to do, just kind of like if a if a plane crashes, there is wreckage. We don't have to find the black box all the time.
SPEAKER_05Right.
SPEAKER_06We need to clean up that wreckage. That's what we need to do, that's the work, and it starts with understanding the triggers. Like what are so that's the first assignment that I give to a person is that I need to know what's happening in your life, your day-to-day, that's actually triggering some of these things to sort of come to the surface. Because the trigger is actually the thing that leads us back to the site that needs to be healed. And so um, if we don't know what those things are, we can think, oh, our relationships are just aren't working, or maybe the this employee is giving me a hard time, or the person at the grocery store, or whatever. But the truth is that that trigger is actually just an indicator that helps us to know the space to heal. The other thing that I think uh Kelly is talking about, and I wholeheartedly agree with, is that we have to learn to be with our feelings and what comes up for us rather than distracting ourselves from them, numbing them, pushing them away, or avoiding them. So I uh support people in learning how to come out of those spaces so that they actually can allow it to come up and out versus pushing it down or leaving it in a corner, kind of like a little uh a little monster that's gonna like peep up somewhere. Right. Like we don't want, you know, stuff popping out when we don't, when we least expect it. We want to be able to be with it and understand it and allow it to come up and out.
SPEAKER_04I love that you said that you don't necessarily have to go all the way back to all of those deep dark places. Um and I hope that really, you know, invites somebody to maybe try it out. And maybe it doesn't have to, you don't have to know exactly where the trigger leads, but just knowing that you have a trigger and then to get strategies for what to do with that. Yes. I love this. I love this. So, Tiki, I would love to come to you from like the entrepreneur standpoint, right? We have two amazing practitioners with us, right? Protecting our mind and protecting our body. As an entrepreneur, how do you choose practitioners like Cantis, like Kelly, to support you in being at your best and really being with your emotions while also getting amazing results?
SPEAKER_02As a leader, I may not necessarily find a clinician, but I may find another person that has the same challenges. And I'll give an example. One of the things they talked about is the body and the mind, and I think that's really great. You know, what I try to focus it on is what was the thing, how is this thing gonna be used, and what do I need to have victory and overcome? Okay, and so that's a and I know that uh mentally, um, you know, I work with a lot of uh mental health professionals or HR professionals, I think about career. I I just think sometimes for me the evolution is a little different, and I often find safety for me with those who may have not the same, because we're all unique, but maybe at the same intersection. And I'll give you an example. Uh there are sometimes I can talk to a therapist, and even though they're trying to address the personal me, it doesn't get to the thing that I'm really trying to get to because there's this whole other thing that there may not be capacity to understand. Got it. I don't know if that makes sense. I'm trying to make it make sense. And so I think working with a therapist or uh uh doing body work, working out, just think the different leaders have different ways that they release. Um they have different ways that they try to unpack, and then also too, one of the biggest things that people don't talk about is safety, psychological safety. What would be my advice is one recognize that you have an opportunity, a challenge, how is it impacting your life, and then taking a route to look at truth versus lies and moving that forward. Um and I have found more growth with a spiritual dualist such as Janice, who's also in business, or a Dr. Darniell, or someone like that, that that they bring Christ into what they do in business and their synergy on on culture, my business, and Christ overall. So yeah.
SPEAKER_04What I love that you brought into the conversation was the importance to diversify your support team. Yes. Right? Yes. And make sure it matches the season that you're in.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_04The season that you're in, it also matches what you need, it matches what you believe. Um, and just making sure that it really just is for you. It's designed for you. Um and using that same discernment you talked about a couple beats back, right?
SPEAKER_03Right.
SPEAKER_04Um, about how to move in the business, the same that same desert discernment apply to how you pick your practitioners. Yeah. Which practitioners for what season makes a lot, a lot of sense. So let's do a quick rhythm audit. You can answer yes or no. Do I know what season my business is in? Do I know what season my body is in? And do I know a rhythm that helps me hear God, hear my body, and hear myself? That one reminds you me of you, T P. If you answered no to more than two of those, you do not need to feel ashamed. You just need rhythm. So when we come back, we're gonna close with the final part of Rise, which is embody love. It might be my favorite. This is where grounded leadership becomes more than a concept, it becomes how you show up, how you choose, how you communicate, how you Build and how you love yourself in the process. If you're enjoying these conversations on the grounded CEO, I want to personally invite you into the grounded lounge. Much like this show, the lounge is a weekly virtual space where black entrepreneurs and leaders can grow, heal, and rise in community. Each week, we gather for grounded coaching, honest conversation, practical tools, and the kind of support that helps you build without losing yourself. Your next level needs more than strategy and needs a more grounded view. Join us inside the Grounded Lounge. Now we're closing with the final part of Rise embody love. For a grounded CEO, love is alignment and action. It is how we lead ourselves. It is how we make decisions, it's how we honor our bodies, and it's how we tell the truth. And it's also how we listen to God. It's how you build something that does not require you to disappear inside of it. All right, so let's get into it. Tiki, I'm gonna start with you because this is a question we talk about. This is a question I hear from so many of the entrepreneurs that I work with. They're like, you know, I lead with love, and of course, I lead a lot of people, and I need to hold them accountable. So, how can both love and accountability live in the same space on a day-to-day basis?
SPEAKER_02Yes, that's a very good question. As a matter of fact, I was just teaching on love and leadership sometimes doesn't mix. And so I think as an entrepreneur, just in my own life, I think we all start with love. We start with love when we have a business. When we put a job out there, there's an opportunity when we train and develop and give people a future and a hope. But at some time, as a leader, you have to think about the entire ecosystem of what you're building and how small misses, I think in relationships they call them red flags or blind spots, but how small misses in situations. I'll just use a person example. In 2025, like many entrepreneurs, my business took a slight bump. And it was really deep and I didn't know, but at the time, because I really loved my team, I didn't do what I normally would do in corporate, which is start thinking about furloughs or layoffs or some of this. And I still had that the little engine I think we can. I don't regret having that love for them, but I missed the importance of the entire ecosystem for clients and for the future health of the business. So what I just tell entrepreneurs, I think you start with love, and love is inviting people to stay, or love is inviting people to find that great opportunity that they're looking for. And it may not always be in your business. The final thing I'd just say, and I'll close with this, is that when you start to feel guilty about speaking up or saying something or holding someone accountable, that she talked about bodywork. That's the first flag that you're dealing with trauma or something that you can't say, listen, great person, this is just not working out. Yeah. Because here's the implications of that. So I think love and leadership can go, but leadership when you have a business must always override. Yeah. There are certain cases where love comes first.
SPEAKER_04And what I noticed is that you started with loving others, and then you said my misstep was not necessarily loving my business as well, and maybe as soon enough. And I love that because you're reminding us that love first starts with ourselves. Yes. Right? We're so quick, some of us, we're givers naturally, and we go to kind of give it out instead of first giving it here. Right. Right? So I'd love to go to you, Kenties, and talk about what has loving you looked like. Because sometimes, you know, we talk about loving ourselves and it can sound airy fairy, and you know, but what does that actually practically look like for you and some of your clients?
SPEAKER_06Uh for me, it is valuing myself so much so that I am very clear and aware about like what type of energies I want to be interacting with, like who I want in my space, who I want on my team. And it leads to the B-word. Boundaries. Boundaries, yes. And you know, that word is is kind of sexy right now, right? We people like no, I don't do that because I have boundaries. Like, whatever. Um, so I want to be clear though, because a lot of times boundaries could seem like it's being weaponized. Right. I was gonna ask you about that. But really, boundaries is a definition of the opening where I I allow you in. Okay. So think about like I give people the analogy, I'm the queen of analogies of your home, right? I don't want you coming in through the window. I want you coming in through the back door. But this front door right here, you can come to that space. And that's where I have uh defined for you to be able to come in. Now there's some rules. You can't come in here, you know, acting any way, willy-willy. I don't want, I don't want uh solicitors, right? But yeah, boundaries, boundaries are really um really more about you being clear up with yourself first. Okay. Um, and then um, you know, uh operating from that. It's not always something that you have to tell or justify to anybody. It is really about you kind of having a really good understanding on what your personal standards are and how you want people to conduct themselves with you. It is not a keep out, yeah, it is this is what is okay for me. So that is that's how I do it. And I do it with anybody, everybody can get it. It doesn't matter who it is, right? My family, it doesn't really matter. And I have a friend who calls me all the time, and she was like, Well, I know you have boundaries. So, I mean, I don't know if you share that or not. And so I'm like, Yes, thank you so much for respecting me.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I love that. And I love that you said you should start with first just being honest with yourself about what you need. Yeah. Because so many of us, myself included, I know sometimes I can skip over that. Right. And my one follow-up question, right? Because once you get clear around what you need, how do you not fall into the trap of trying to control other people? Oh, that's really good.
SPEAKER_06That's very good. Um, and and actually, um boundaries, uh, I'm so glad you asked that because it could be uh confused with that. Boundaries is not about at all what what you are uh getting other people to do. It is about your sort of um standard or your uh kind of well-thought out um uh way to say this is what I will or will not do. Um I I like to use money as an example because it's very straightforward. Right? It's like, well, you can ask me to borrow $50 all day, but I know that I have boundaries around me not being a you know a bank and loan company, right? So therefore, I already know how I may respond to that. Right. And it doesn't mean that I'm gonna keep you out or at or or tell you you can't ask me, but I I boundaries is about knowing, I uh me knowing how I'm gonna respond.
SPEAKER_04Yes. And I love that example because I think a lot of us support other family members and friends, etc. That's why I like to use money. Yes. We you know we can all relate. Yes, we can all relate. Absolutely. So, Kelly, so much of your work is about being embodied and it's about embodied love. So when it comes to self-love and our bodies, what can you really, how can you guide us into doing that more practically on a day-to-day basis?
SPEAKER_01Oh, that's a good one because I think that's all about my daily life now, right? More self-love, more embodied practices. So I try to live by the there are about four pillars around self-care. So I rest, I take naps without shame, without guilt now. You know, 10-15 years ago I wasn't that human. Um I process my stuff, right? I think it's important as someone who is, you know, leading an organization or entrepreneur to really process your stuff. Um as well as create. So I create, I make time to create. Um, that works for me when I don't have a lot of access to all of my needs, right? So I am someone who strives to get my needs met because I existed once without getting my needs met, and it was quite uncomfortable.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01Um, and I also make sure that I connect, I connect with others, I connect with safe people, and I connect with community. So I think that's embody love. Yes. And prioritize my self-care that way.
SPEAKER_04Yes. I'm so glad you brought community into the space because I think when I think about my own self-love, I go to community first. You know, I'm a joiner, folks know I'm a joiner. I join all the things, and I've joined the Boat Collective. I have amazing sisters all around the world. And I cannot tell you, you know, where I'd be if it weren't for so many business besties and sister friends. And um, I'm so glad you brought that into the room because that's that's so, so important. Um, one other layer of love, right, is releasing, is letting go. And so oftentimes when I'm coaching different leaders, they're, you know, they have this little inkling, this this sound, this voice that says, I'm here to do more, you're here to do more. And they're like, I mean, where? How? How do you discern when it's time to let go of something? Kelly, yes, how do you discern when it's time to let go?
SPEAKER_01I I'm so glad you asked that because I wanted to make sure that we talked about approaching these type of things with curiosity, right? So when you are a leader, when you are an entrepreneur, and things show up that like you described, I think we have to approach it with curiosity. Get curious about it. Why am I in discomfort? Am I trying to run from it? And when we listen to our bodies and approach that discomfort with curiosity, our bodies will communicate to us what we need. Yes. We just have to listen.
SPEAKER_06That's interesting. Thank you, Kelly. Yeah, I love that. And I I want to just piggyback on that. Um, you know, as a therapist that also blends coaching into my work, um, I tell people that we have to ask powerful questions. And sometimes um we are not getting the answer that we need because of the question is not shaped. So it's like, well, okay, well, why can't I? Or why is this not happening? Right. And so that's only gonna lead you to the evidence for the why around the negative. But if you can ask, what will it take for this to happen, or uh what shifts need to uh take place in order for me to advance or expand, or what is it that I'm holding that no longer serves me? Yeah, that I need to let go of, right? We ask those types of powerful questions, it leads us to the answers uh that will help us help us to shift in the ways that we need to.
SPEAKER_04You made me think about a particular entrepreneur that I coached recently, and she was coming to the awareness during the session that she needed to put herself first more.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Um, and then she said, But I'm only ready for three minutes. Like I can't, to me, anything more than that a day feels like overindulgence. Wow. And so for someone who is just beginning their journey of putting themselves first, of giving themselves, you know, permission to rest, permission to play, create, someone who's really high achieving, right? Where would you say to start for someone like that? You know what?
SPEAKER_06Start right there. This is my my uh my my encouragement and and my advocacy is that you have to start, which is might be a cliche, but you have to start where you are. And if that is where she is at, then that is a great place to start because earlier I said it is not quantity, it's quality. Right. So then I would get in there and let's really come up with a very clear um strategy of how that three minutes is gonna serve and then expand. Exactly. Right, because the truth is is that um when we take the best care of ourselves, yeah, then we show up. We show up way more powerful, and we have expanded capacity to uh handle um even more. So um, and and in kind of in your world, exploits, right? Handle those exploits. So yeah.
SPEAKER_04And I love that we're ending on that note, right? We're ending on the note to just start exactly from where you are. That's the most loving thing you can do, is just start from where you are. All right, so Cantise, where can everyone connect with you with you to learn more about Living My Worth and your book, Me Moment?
SPEAKER_06So I am on uh Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, uh as Cantese Borrell or Living My Worth. So uh all things. And uh you can go to my website, www.livingmyworth.com, uh, to see about Me Moment and all of the great things uh that I'm doing there. Thank you so much for having me.
SPEAKER_04Of course, I can't wait for more folks to know you and grow from your work. All right, Kelly, where can folks connect with you and learn more about somatic coaching work?
SPEAKER_01Yes, you can access my website at KellyNicolecoaching.com. And you can find me on LinkedIn as well.
SPEAKER_04Awesome. Thank you so much for coming. All right, tiki, where can folks connect with you?
SPEAKER_02Yes, so first of all, thanks for having me. Two websites, www.hrnco.com. That is my human capital practice, or www.tikifavorot.com. That is my wisdom table kind of like um sage practice. So either one, or you can reach out to her and she knows how to find me. So you can go for me.
SPEAKER_04That's my sense. Thank you so much. These three are powerhouses, so make sure you run to all their socials, share what you have you know gotten from today. And because this is our very first episode, I want to leave you with this. Being a grounded CEO is not a title. No. It's a practice. It's the practice of telling the truth sooner, healing with intention, honoring your rhythm, listening to your body, trusting your spirit, and embodying love in the way you lead, build, decide, rest, repair, and rise. This season, we are going to sit inside the real tensions entrepreneurs face. The endings, the pivots, the grief, the pressure, the relationships, yes, all of them, the family decisions, the empathy, the faith, and the success that looks good on paper, but does not always feel good in your body. We are not here for surface conversations. We are here to get grounded. So welcome to the grounded CEO. Stay connected to the grounded CEO and every Zerlo Network favorite on demand anytime you like. Download the free Zerlo Network TV app on Roku or Amazon Fire TV. Zerlo Network is streaming 24 7, ready to help you make it possible.