S11 EP 06 // The Beauty of Speaking Up With Authentic Boldness

Amiga, have you ever wanted to speak up, but stopped yourself because you were afraid someone would think you were mean, rude, or too much? In this week's cafecito chat, I’m reflecting on what it means to speak up with authentic boldness.

 Amiga you can be humble and still be direct, and you can care about people without making their opinions the measure of your worth.

This cafecito chat is about trusting your voice, trusting God with how He wants to use it in this season.  In this episode,  I’m also reflecting on the stories of Abigail and the woman with the issue of blood, two women in the Bible who remind me that authentic boldness can look different than what we expect. Abigail used her voice with wisdom, while the woman with the issue of blood reached for Jesus despite her fear and suffering. Read the story of Abigail in 1 Samuel 25  Read the story of the woman with the issue of blood in Mark 5:25–34

Grab your cafecito. Let’s talk about the beauty of speaking up with authentic boldness. Share this episode with your Amigas, together we shine brighter. 

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Transcript

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Hey amiga, I've been waiting for a cafecito chat. I'm so happy you're here. Welcome to Fearless Muhed, a space where we slow down, live intentionally, become beautifully rooted in who God created us to be, and where we create una hermosa vida, a beautiful life. Because every muhead deserves to honor her story and how far she's come. Amica Ela, a chicana who loves Jesus and her cafecito, a published author, and a storyteller at heart. Here we connect, grow together, live intentionally, and honor our strength and the beauty God has placed inside of us. So amiga, Lisa, grab your cafecito. This is gonna be good. Amiga, welcome to a brand new episode. I'm so glad that you're here. Thank you so much for sharing your day with me, your evening. Today's episode is a little different because I actually had a listener reach out to me about this topic, and I'm like, you know what? I'm gonna make it into an episode. And the reason why is because this is actually something that I am working on with one of my clients. And so it was kind of like confirmation that this is something that I need to share. And so here we are. So today is cafecito chat slash mentoring because I'm probably just gonna do a part two of this when it's time to have another cafecito chat. But hey, welcome if you're new. I'm glad that you're here. Thank you for being part of this community. Um, I did pause for a couple of months there, and we're in season 11 now. So if you ever feel like you want to kind of know more about what Fearless Muher is or things that I have done, I will say go back. There's 11 seasons here, right? Go back and just listen to other episodes. I've had the privilege of, you know, having virtual cafecito with amazing women, right? We've talked about so many different things, hard things, sad things, just things that really have allowed us to grow. And of course, God is always in the center of it. Why? Because it's important, right? It's important to have uh that faith, right? It's important, important to be rooted and grounded in something that is going to help you understand your identity, right? We have gone through so many things in this life, and I think that sometimes when life's hurdles come our way, right? Those curveballs, the things we're not expecting, heartbreak, grief, loss, right? Just unexpected things. We sometimes get lost in the midst of it all, and we forget who we are. And so I want to remind you today and encourage you. I just feel in my heart that this is for somebody. No matter what you're going through, no matter what things happen in your life that are unexpected, or you're like, what happened, right? Like, this is not what I thought um my life was gonna be, or I thought this was gonna turn out another way. It's so easy to get sad and get caught up in the midst of that and kind of get caught up in the circumstances and forget that man, God still has something beautiful in store for me. And so I want to remind you and encourage you, God still has something beautiful in store for you today, Amiga, and for your future. And another thing is one of the things that I think I struggled with this just a little bit. Um, but I've also heard this from others is when your season was so busy, right? With projects, with um events, with just different things that you were working on or doing, or maybe like you laid something down that you're like, right now it's not the time. Maybe, you know, ministry, whatever it is, right? Your business, whatever you kind of started, were busy, and now it's like, you know what, I had to lay that down, right? And maybe you're like, man, I thought like my season was gonna be different. Um, how do I get back to that? Or um, I don't feel that I am being productive, right? There's so many things that can we can allow our mind to kind of get stuck on, right? To keep thinking about. And I want to just encourage you this. God is always working, God is always moving. And even when you think that, man, just because I'm not doing that anymore, just because I'm not busy with that anymore, um, I'm not anybody, or I'm not important, or there's no meaning, I'm not X, Y, Z, fill in the blank. I want you to understand that sometimes God will allow you to sit down so that you can be the one kind of looking from the outside in, kind of really seeing a bigger picture, but also to show you that your identity is not rooted in the things that you are doing, in your title, in who you know, and who you're sitting with. Sometimes the most beautiful thing is just sitting at the feet of Jesus and allowing him to pour into you. There are the seasons where God is just gonna pour into you. And you have to understand that it is okay to not be busy like that. It is okay to not be in certain crowds like that. Sometimes the most important thing is just sitting at the feet of Jesus, because that is when he truly begins to pour into you. And that is when he truly begins to reveal who you really are, right? Because you're not your titles, you're not your accomplishments, you're not your accolades, you're not even the circles that you sit in. Okay. You may be trying to be part of something, right? You may be trying to help someone build something, but God is actually trying to give you your own thing. And if you don't allow yourself to really sit there and sit in the quiet, right, you're gonna miss it. You are going to miss it, I mean, and this was not part of this episode, but you know, this is just the cherry on top of the Sunday. This is a little bit of extra, you know, extra crema in your cafecito. But seriously, I want to encourage you today, okay? Do not allow past seasons to define you because God is always working. The season that you thought was your biggest accomplishment was your biggest wow season, right? It was probably just a little taste of what God really has for you. And this reminds me of Mary and Martha in the Bible, right? While Mary was so worried about what needed to take place, she's worried about the cooking. I'm paraphrasing, she's worried about the cooking and probably like having everything perfect and together. The other sister, she's over there sitting at the feet of Jesus, allowing him to pour into her, and she's not worried about what's going on behind the scenes. And though you may think, well, that's kind of messed up, that's kind of bogus because she should have been helping her sister because that's how Martha felt. Jesus, tell her to come help me. But Jesus said, Mary is doing what is right for her, that will not be taken from her. See, you can't care, and that this is actually gonna go into our episode for today. You cannot care what other people think about you because of your season, because of what you're walking through, because of what you're doing right now, or because of who you are, because you choose to use your voice, you can't care because what other people think of you is none of your business, okay. I don't know how else to put it, but I'm not gonna sugarcoat it. What people think of you is none of your business. The funny thing about people, okay, is that some people they will be your friend in one season. They will be your friends because of the circles you sat in, because of the tables you ate at, because of the places that you stood in, okay, because of where your name was on that, you know, pamphlet, who tagged you, whatever, the thing that you did, the title that somebody gave you. Let me tell you, people will be your friend because of that. But the minute that you're not in the spotlight, people will really just kind of show you who they really are. I'm just saying. Because in one season, the same person who loves you and smiles in your face, in the next season when there's nothing going on, they're not so happy to sit in that circle with you. Because now, in their eyes, you're doing nothing. Because unfortunately, let me tell you something. We live in a culture where everything is posted, everything is look at what I am doing, and unfortunately, it's always look at what I'm doing in the name of Jesus. And sometimes it's not even about Jesus because the heart posture isn't even there. Okay, that's another story. So, what other people think of you, it's none of your business, amiga. Hey, my puppy is crying because I came to record in my little studio over here. So I'm gonna go get my puppy and I'll be right back. Well, I don't know if you can hear my little puppy here, Talula, but she's just she loves me. She don't want to be away from me. I don't know. But um, she's been such a blessing in this season of my life, so I'm really grateful for her. Like seriously. So, for all of y'all that are dog mummies, well, I have a little co-host here. Um, I thought she would be okay in the in the sala over there. Had a movie on for her, but just wasn't happening. You may or may not have heard her after I edit this, but um anyway, let me kind of let me kind of get back here. So, what other people think of you cannot be any of your business. Now, a couple of years ago, I was part of a business mastermind that was a Christian business mastermind. I loved it, it was amazing. I met amazing mujeres, my coach, my mentor. She was such an amazing woman who just had this genuine heart, this authenticity, right? And I loved that about her, but I also loved that she was honest, right? She was honest about um where you were in your business, honest about the things you were struggling with. We had a lot of mindset work, and so one of the things that she said to us, now there was a lot of us were kind of new to business, new to building our brand, things like that. So this was a while ago, and one of the things that she said to those that, and I think honestly, just as Latina women, we um I've seen it, I've been there. We struggle with asking for money, we struggle with really charging what we know we should charge because we don't want to scare people away. Like, that's a whole thing, right? That's a whole other episode. But here's the thing, amiga. We struggle with these things, right? The imposter syndrome kicks in. Like, who am I to be charging for this? Yet you have all this life experience and this wisdom that you've gained that people are just waiting. I'm serious. When I say this, okay, to those of you that want to start mentoring, that want to start coaching, that want to start a business, you sit there in your head, okay, and you tell yourself and convince yourself that you shouldn't do something, but yet people are literally waiting for that thing. And I've seen it. Literally, I've seen it. There's been times that I've been on a break and people message me like, hey, you know, do you think you can coach me? Why? Because of the credibility that I have built, that I have, the consistency, right, that I've gained over these years of coaching and podcasting. And let who you are speak for for itself, okay. That goes for what we're gonna talk about today, too. But one thing that she would say to everyone that was afraid to charge, she would say, your client's wallet is none of your business. Okay, just kind of hold that thought there. Your client's wallet is none of your business. Why do you think that your client's wallet is none of your business? Just kind of think about it a little bit. When you start to think, now I'm gonna kind of rephrase this, I'm gonna switch it up a little bit, okay? This is what I told my client because the topic that we're talking about today is what someone messaged me about on Instagram the other day. This person said to me, basically, if I talk about what's bothering me, other people might think that I'm rude, right? Or mean. It's all about growth and transformation, exploring who you are, mindset shifts. I mean, this is something that it's a blend of mindset, it's a blend of really going through those limiting beliefs, it's a blend of identity work. So it's such an amazing coaching program that I'm actually offering one-on-one. At some point, I'll probably do um like a group thing, but right now it is one-on-one. And if you have been wanting to do some mindset work and really sit in a safe space, I encourage you to reach out to me on Instagram at the Fearless Mohead Podcast because I am offering scholarship, a scholarship for a limited time. And there's only like two. So if you've been thinking about it, you know, this is the perfect time. We are in fall, you know, it's it's just that time to work on yourself. I think that a lot of times we get so busy, right? Things like this, what we're talking about. We get so caught up in our head, and we just need to get out of that box, get out of that mindset, get out of kind of the funk that we have gotten into. So I encourage you to reach out to me. I'd love to sit with you, talk. But uh, this is what me and my client have been exploring, right? Because somewhere along, right? Somewhere along her launching a passion project, this I believe was really hindering her. And I told her this. Why? Because there were certain agreements that she had already made about her using her voice, and so this right here, let me tell you, when we start to think that I can't say something, I can't say XYZ, I can't even speak up because others are gonna think that about me. Now we have fear of what others think of us, and let me tell you something fear of what others think of you is always going to hold you captive, always you won't have the boldness to launch the passion projects that the Lord has put on your heart. Here's the thing: these are agreements that you've actually been living by, and chances are, just like with my client, chances are that there has been one experience or multiple experiences in your life where you sat there, where you sat there, and because you said something, somebody took it the wrong way. Maybe they got triggered, maybe um they felt some type of way about it, projected it onto you, and now all of a sudden you're sitting there thinking, I can't say what I need to say, because if I do, this negative result is gonna come out of it. And if you're listening to this, you're probably like, wait a minute. I think, I think that this is exactly what it is. And I'm pretty sure that if you're listening to this, this is for you. I mean, guys, at any moment you're like, whoa, hold on a second here. Now, why does this happen? I actually have a worksheet. If you want it, I'm happy to send it to you. Just uh again, send me a DM on Instagram at the Fearless Mohead Podcast, and I can send it to you. Um, it's really just about exploring, right? Exploring what unhealthy agreements that you have been living by and why. Because it's not enough to know that, oh yeah, I struggle with overthinking or I struggle with feeling afraid of what others are gonna think. But if you don't know why, how are you ever gonna really take care of that? How are you ever gonna get to the root of it and actually begin to overcome that? So here's the thing, Amia. Something that has to happen, this has to happen, is that you have to begin creating a boundary line between what others think of you and who you actually are. Because what if God put boldness in you and you're not exercising it? There's a reason why. Now, again, I'm gonna make a part two of this because I think that what I really want to share, I cannot elaborate in one episode, okay? Really, there needs to be a part two, right? Because even in our boldness, there is a healthy way to ex, there is a healthy way to express it, and then there's an unhealthy way to express it. That's a whole other separate thing, but you need to begin creating a boundary line between what others think of you and who God says that you are, right? Because if people are saying, dang, Jackie, dang, Susie, you're so mean because you say this and that. But what if the Lord has called you to bring conviction? I once had another client who um she shared with me that every time she would speak up about um starting a business or her healing, people would start acting funny towards her. And through us doing coaching, right, we discovered that she's actually triggering people, not on purpose, but because they haven't done the necessary work to get to the place that she was at, where she had the boldness to launch a business, where she had the boldness to begin her healing journey. This was a while ago, and see that's the thing. Sometimes the Lord calls you to be the one to rattle people, to shake things up a little bit. There's my goals. What? So sometimes the Lord calls you to be that person, and it's not always to do it in a mean way, it's because sometimes you're the person that makes everybody else open their eyes, that makes everybody else begin to see things from a different perspective. Maybe you're the person that begins to help others, you know, really have the courage to step into their healing and talk about some deeply rooted things that need to be healed. So you have no idea why God put boldness in you. And that is why you cannot care what other people think of you, okay? In regards to this. Anytime that you care what others think of you, I'm not saying that I never struggled with it. I struggled with it a lot. Right before I started coaching and podcasting years ago, I struggled with that a lot. And maybe you wouldn't have known it, but there were so many times when I would want to start certain things and then I would stop because someone would say something. This is why I talk about these things. Until I understood and I had the courage and boldness to know that man, God called me to do this, and I have to do it because I'm doing it for God. So, what other people think, and here's the thing, Amiga, you never know who you're gonna help with what you're doing. With your voice, with your writing, with your mentoring, with your ministry, you don't know who you're going to help until you actually start doing it. Just like I said earlier, someone's waiting for you to do that very thing that you're scared to do. But once you do it and you see that, man, you're helping people, see, God takes the foolish things of this world to shame the wise. And when you see the hands of God actually moving in your life, when you see the hands of God helping other people, amiga, it doesn't matter at that point what people think. This is why knowing your identity in God is so important. So you have to create that boundary line that says, whatever people think of me, it really is none of my business. You have to, and this is why once you start, I don't know what it is that God has put on your heart. I don't know what he called you to do. But once you start that thing and you begin to see, man, this is working, this is helping others, this is whatever it is, right? Because I don't know what it is that God called you to do. Maybe he called you to start a podcast. But when you begin to see that, man, that is actually bringing in results, not just for me, but for others, you won't even care what people think. And the hardest part of this, the most challenging part of this, too, is when you go through hard things and God calls you to be vulnerable, and now maybe others, maybe others begin to look at you differently. And that's okay. You can't care what others think of you. Okay? Not because of your circumstances, not because of what you've gone through, because it's the things that you go through that God's gonna use. So while you may have shame or embarrassment, just know that God has something bigger planned for that. All right, that's another episode. But here's here's where where I want to go, and I'm gonna actually share. I don't want to take a lot of time because I do want to do a part two of this. And that part two is gonna be um the healthy and unhealthy way to be bold, which we're gonna tie into this. And so I do want to just share uh two ladies in the Bible, okay? So we're gonna have a little Bible story today, okay. Just bear with me. It's not a Bible study, but it's just good examples of what I'm talking about. Now, um, in this worksheet that I have, which if you don't want it, you don't have to get it, you can, like I said, message me, I'll send it to you. But there's a couple of things here, okay? There may have been a time in your life where you did speak up. You spoke up and you shared something, and what happened? People judged you for it. So this is why it's important that you understand who you are, that you also pray for discernment when it comes to speaking up, right? And that's why I want to talk about um unhealthy and healthy ways to be bold and speak up and having discernment, right? Having discernment is really knowing, like, okay, this is a moment to share this. This is a moment when somebody needs to hear this. And so a question that I have for you, Amiga, right? What is the belief or the label or the statement that you've been living by? Have you been living by that statement? If I speak up, people are gonna think that I'm mean. Or have you been believing this lie that when I speak up, I'm mean, people think I'm mean? So maybe you labeled yourself based on something that happened. And where, where, when was the moment that you began to believe that about yourself? And how does that belief affect the way you see yourself, the way that you speak up? You have to begin to understand these things and ask yourself because if you don't, you will never, never be free to speak up. And let me tell you, God did not call us to dim ourselves down, to be quiet. Yes, sometimes we're called to just you know, stay quiet, stay quiet because he gives us our moment to speak up, but he didn't call us to dim ourselves down, to not say stuff because oh my god, they're gonna get mad. Listen to this. If you are saying, I'm not gonna say anything because they're gonna think I'm mean, they're gonna get mad. Guess what? What does that sound like to you? That sounds like people pleasing. So this is why it's important to understand. Okay, where did I begin believing this? Where did I, what was the moment? What happened? What shifted that got me to think that way? Because once you understand, you will know, okay, is this a fear thing or is this a people pleasing thing? Which people pleasing is kind of there's fear there around people pleasing. If if there's something that you know you're constantly worrying about, oh, I don't want them to get mad at me, I don't want them to get mad at me. There's fear of man, okay. So here's what I want to share, okay? I want to share with you this woman in the Bible named Abigail, okay? I'm gonna give you two scenarios, then I'm gonna wrap up this episode, and next cafecito chao, we're gonna go into part two of this. But Abigail was a woman who spoke up with so much wisdom. You can actually read the story of Abigail in 1 Samuel 25. So Abigail was married to Nabal. I believe that's how you pronounce his name. He was wealthy, and he was also in he's described as being like really foolish, okay? When David's men were in the wilderness, right? King David, they protected Nabal's shepherds. And later David sent messengers asking for provision, but Nabal insulted them, he refused. So David, of course, became angry, right? Like, who's not gonna get angry about that? So he had this plan that he was gonna attack Nabal's house, his whole household. And when Abigail heard of this, she took action. She gathered food, she went to meet David, and she plead for him to not take revenge. So she told him that he could that he shouldn't carry the guilt of unnecessary bloodshed, right? And she reminded him of who God had called him to be and asked him to remember that his future was so much bigger than that moment, right? So David listened, and her wisdom kept him from coming after her household. Now that was wisdom, okay. And what is so amazing about Abigail is that she took action that took boldness, she spoke up in a moment where like something bad could happen. She didn't wait for someone else to speak up for her to say something to fix a situation. She saw what was happening and she used her voice. Her courage wasn't even loud, it was actually very humble because she prepared food, she gathered food for them. So here's one example where sometimes speaking up isn't about being mean and rude, right? Sometimes speaking up is just about knowing who you are, being bold enough to say or do what needs to be done, but also being bold enough to take action. Okay, so then we have the woman who bled for 12 years. And if you go to church, if you read the Bible, you know this story. So this woman had been bleeding for 12 years. Okay, just imagine that. 12 years, like, girl, let me keep it real here. When it is that time of the month, like, oh my god. I'm just like, let me hide. I don't even want to go anywhere, I just don't want to talk to anyone. I'm good. But y'all can relate, I know you can. But she bled for 12 years, okay? She had gone to doctors, she did everything, I think she did everything that she possibly could to really take care of her issue. So I'm gonna read the Bible verse to you. It says, Um, now a woman suffering from bleeding for 12 years had endured much under many doctors. She had spent everything she had and was not helped at all. On the contrary, she became worse. Having heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his clothing, for she said, If I just touch his clothes, I'll be made well. Instantly her flow of blood seized and the sent and she sensed in her body that she was healed of her affliction. At once Jesus realized in himself that power had gone out from him. He turned around in the crowd and said, Who touched my clothes? His disciples said to him, You see the crowd pressing against you, and yet you say, Who touched me? But he was looking around to see who had done this. The woman with fear and trembling, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell down before him and told him the whole truth. Daughter, he said to her, Your faith has saved you. Go in peace and be healed from your affliction. Some translations say that she just wanted to touch the hem of his garment. Okay, the hem, just the little piece of his clothing. And you know what? Even in reading this, it says that she had spent everything she had. She was desperate, and yet her issue never got fixed. Okay. 12 years of pain and disappointment. You just spent every dollar you have, maxed out your credit cards, you've done everything, and nothing has changed for you physically. That's just crazy. That would be so discouraging. And Jesus was like her moment of desperation. If I just touch him, I mean, he was in a crowd. And if you read the Bible, you know that there were the masses were following him. But she knew that, man, there was this faith in her, this desperation to be healed, to know that, man, he can heal me, right? So because of her faith, right? Because of her faith, because of her boldness, this humble boldness that she had, she touched his garment. And that healed her. And actually, we could make a whole other episode of this because it says in here that he felt the power. Power had gone out from him. Like, what faith must she have had, right? So what happened? He didn't shun her, he didn't say, like, why are you touching me? Whatever, right? He healed her, right? And he didn't just heal her, he called her. He called her because he said, Who touched me? In her silence, right? In her silence, she was suffering silently, but her faith in that moment shined. Here was Abigail who used her voice to protect others, and the woman who bled used her faith to reach for healing, and they both shared boldness, they both were bold, they both displayed boldness, they both used boldness to some extent. And you know what's really cool? They both did it in a humble way. So here's the thing, Amiga. You don't always have to be the loudest, you don't always have to be the wittiest. You don't always have to be the one that's like, look at me, look at me, right? I'm not saying you're like that. If you listen to this podcast, more there's more than likely you're not like that. Let me just put it that way. And the thing is, Amiga, that you don't always have to be the way others think you should be, or say things the way others think you should say. Sometimes you want to say something, because this has happened to me. Sometimes I want to say something and I don't. I know maybe you think that's hard to believe, but I don't always say what I'm thinking. You know, I watch and I'm observing and I watch patterns and I see things and I hold it and I hold it and I'm like, okay, sometimes I do want to say things. And God's like, nope, just wait. Just wait, right? That's the discernment part. So here's one woman used her boldness, used her her way to speak up in a dangerous moment, right? Because King David could have like, could have, I don't know, he could have gotten mad and been like, you know what, I'm gonna go to your house right now. Since you want to talk for your husband. I don't know, right? He could have, I mean, women weren't really valued back then like that. The other one, she was in the crowd. She in that moment, think about when you're hurting. You don't care about nothing else in that moment, but man, God, I just need you to help me right now. Because you know that's the only thing that's gonna help you. That's the only thing that's gonna work. Some of you had that moment. I know I did before I gave my life to Jesus. I had that moment where God, I tried everything else. I drank, I couldn't drink my pain away. I couldn't, you know, get into a new relationship and make everything go away. I couldn't buy more clothes and make everything better inside. Like, God, this is you're all that I have now. There's nothing else. If you don't help me, right? If you don't help me change my life, if you don't help this madness I feel inside, this sadness, this depression. If you don't help me, God, then nothing is gonna work. And I think I can definitely relate to the woman that bled. She stepped into the crowd and didn't care what anybody thought of her. So one spoke up before things got worse, and the other spoke out after years of suffering. But both of them showed that you can be uncertain of the outcome but still act, right? Take action. You can be hurting and you can still reach out. You can be overlooked because I'm sure the woman that bled, she felt overlooked, like nothing's working from you can be discouraged and still speak up. So, I mean uh what do you see here in what I'm saying? That you speaking up comes with boldness, and you have to find that within yourself, because if you don't have authentic boldness, right? And I don't, and this is why I want to make the other episode, right? Because I believe that there's a difference in unhealthy boldness and healthy boldness, right? There's a difference when you are bold and you do it out of discernment. And let me tell you something: speaking up has nothing to do with you being perfect or knowing it all. Seriously, but the boldness, the boldness to also know who you truly are and who God says that you are, to the extent that you're like, I know who I am, I know my identity, I know whose I am, and God called me to say something, and I'm gonna say it, right? Because sometimes you are the one who is called to plant seeds in others. So you thinking that people think you're mean because you say stuff, what does God say to you about that? What if God called you to say? You know, let me tell you something. What I'm telling you is actually biblical, okay? Girl, let me just say what I'm sharing with you is biblical because the word of God says to speak the truth in love. So when you speak, this is where you gotta check your heart posture, right? When you speak, are you doing it out of love? Are you doing it to put others down? Are you doing it to make yourself feel better? There's something about knowing the motive behind your own heart. Why are you doing this? Now I'll be real honest with you. Having this podcast hasn't always been easy. I have wanted to give up many times because of the things that I was going through privately, because of the things that people have said about me, because of the moments where I just felt like I made so many mistakes because of times when I'm like, God, after everything I've done and how I mess up, yet you still want to, you know, use my voice, you still want me to help others. Why, God, right? Like, there's something about when you're going through stuff, you just like sometimes beat yourself down. Like, let's keep it real. And that's why it's so important. If you are someone that walks with God, man, you have to stay in your word. You have to, you have to make the effort to pray. I know we're busy, I mean, I know that life gets so chaotic. Like, I got, I'm gonna be real honest with you. I got home from work today, I was so exhausted. I'm keeping it real, real, okay. It's that time of the month. TMI, but it is. And I am just exhausted. Work, well, work, we're having some, you know, some challenges, right? And it's just a little bit discouraging for me. In my private life, some things happened that I'm just like, God, but you said this, right? And now I have to just, okay, God, let's go back to the basics where I learned to trust you all over again and surrender this moment to you. And me thinking, oh, well, okay, this story is how this goes. And in an interesting turn of events, God's like, I'm not done with that yet. Girl, like, let me tell you, okay, that's how you begin to know, okay, God, you really truly are the author of my story and of my life. And I'm just gonna align to you because I know that if I don't align to you and what you're doing in my life, I'm just gonna be miserable. Right? There's something so beautiful about belonging to God that you know, man, I'm your daughter, God, and you have me in the palm of your hand. And every single thing that I've gone through, you're gonna use for a bigger purpose. So today, I was so exhausted. I also get menstrual migraines, which I hate. Okay. I need progressive glasses that I think just arrived today because I saw my email. My email said that it was in my mailbox, but I don't want to go to the mailroom because I'm tired. I'm just telling you, I'm being real honest with you, okay? I'm speaking my mind right now. And so I was just so exhausted, and I'm like, oh God, I've been planning this episode. Um, I I've been planning it, and I just haven't had a chance to hit that record button. But I'm like, God, it was a struggle for me to record this, to be real honest with you. But see, that's the beauty that I'm like, you know what? Someone asked me a question. I'm currently working on this with someone else, and I know this has been a topic in general over the years, so let's go ahead and record it. Let's have this cafecito chat. And I do it because man, I love you guys. I really, really do. I'm grateful. Six years? Like, come on. Six years of doing this. I am so humbled to all of you that have stayed here. Most of you have been here since the beginning. So I don't do this for myself. Cause me, I love to seclude myself. I love to isolate myself. But I also have the conviction that God's like, hey girl, get back in there. You know, I called you for this. I made you for this. We have to keep going. That's courage. So, Amiga, it's not always perfect. It's not always pretty. And it doesn't have to be perfect. So while you sit there and think that you can't say something or you can't do something because of what other people think, let me tell you, you're dimming your own light. The light that God put inside of you. So let this be your reminder that God didn't call you to stay quiet. Let me tell you, I know that if you're listening to this, you've been through some things. You've had to pick yourself up from that floor a time or two while you're crying. You have seen some things and been through some things, and you probably sit there really surprised. Like, how did I even get here? Maybe you've lost things a time or two, and you've had to start over, and you're like, How did I get here? I learned through therapy that I fought my way to be who I am. I'm by no means perfect. I have not been a perfect mom. Um, I wasn't perfect while married, right? I haven't always got it right. But I fought my way to get here because I grew up in chaos. I had a really weird childhood, I think. And there's so many things that I went through that I think I don't know how I got here. I don't know how I built a life for myself. I've had to start from scratch more times than I can count. And yet here I am by the grace of God. And I know that's your story too. That's why you resonate with this podcast. So today, amiga, give yourself a little credit for fighting your way to be who you are. That's what you have to think about. That's what you have to think about. When you think about man, what are they gonna say? They're gonna think I mean did they help you lift you up when you had to get to a place where you were safe, where you were mentally okay, where emotionally you felt whole again? I want you to think of all those things. See, we take our own self for granted and we give other people more credit than we give ourselves. Now, in no way do I want to take glory away from God for what he's done in your life. But if you had to fight your way to be who you are, to have what you have, to just be the person you are today, that you can look in the mirror and say, Man, I am beautiful. I love myself, I made it through that dark season of my life, and you can look in the mirror and see the beauty in your eyes and in your soul. Amiga, congratulations, props to you. I give you a virtual hug. Why? Because look at all that you've accomplished. Some of you guys have done it all on your own, and maybe you've never ever felt appreciated. Well, I appreciate you, and you need to appreciate who you are, and stop giving so much weight to the words of others who hold no value or relevance in your life. And I'm sorry, girl, like I'm sorry if I sound like I'm being harsh, but I'm just being real with you. So today, amiga, stop worrying about what other people think of you. If there's something that you need to say, you know that God put it in your heart to say it, say it. Pray and ask him to give you the wisdom, the discernment, and the divine moment to say it. Because as long as you're speaking the truth in love, that's what matters. So, next cafecito chat, we are gonna talk about unhealthy and healthy boldness. But listen, amiga, I love you. I really, really hope that this cafecito chat not just encouraged you, but opened your eyes. Okay, helped you think outside of the box because your words are very powerful and other people need them. And hey, go read those stories. I'm gonna put the scriptures um in the show notes if you want to like reference it and kind of just do your own reading and see what it what it speaks to you, because maybe God has a word for you through those verses. And um, if you're like, hey, Mikaela, I would love to do some coaching with you. I do have two 50% off scholarships. So this is your time to get in. And it's one-on-one. So you get to hang out with me. You get to hang out with me for 12 weeks. But I love you, amiga. Share this episode with your amiga, share it with that mujer that came to mind that you're like, man, she needs this. Text the link to her, okay. Um, but I love you. Uh, go ahead and um, if you're not following the podcast on Instagram, the Fearless Moher Podcast, go ahead and give it a follow, message me. I would love to chat with you. One more thing, Amiga, before you go, if you have signed up for the Fearless Moher community newsletter or the blog, I want to encourage you to just go check your spam because a lot of you, when I merged over the website, um, y'all had to re-sign up and then I don't know if I said that right, resign up, sign up again. Um, y'all had to sign up again and um I think they're going to spam. So I just want to ask you if you could please go check your spam. And if you're not signed up, I will put that in the show notes for you so you can just click on the link and sign up. I do send a blog with every episode, and then I try to send a newsletter at least twice a month. Well, amiga, I love you. God bless you. Thank you for being part of this amazing community. Also, make sure that you subscribe to the newsletter. Why? Because pretty soon we are gonna have gaffe sit on, amigas. So I'm super excited about that. God bless you, have an amazing week, and I'll talk to you soon.