WEBVTT 00:00:00.239 --> 00:00:05.360 Editors note this podcast picks up about five minutes into Pastor Colton's message. 00:00:05.519 --> 00:00:09.599 We had an error with the audio and missed the first five minutes. 00:00:09.839 --> 00:00:12.160 But enjoy the rest of this wonderful message. 00:00:12.640 --> 00:00:19.760 Fear steals the ability for us to trust God and do things his way because we think like his way is difficult, his way is different than my way. 00:00:19.920 --> 00:00:22.640 I have a fear that if I do it his way, it'll be worse than my way. 00:00:22.879 --> 00:00:28.879 Fear steals our ability to love people because you instead of loving them, you fear them, so you question them. 00:00:29.039 --> 00:00:30.239 I don't trust you. 00:00:30.480 --> 00:00:34.000 If I put myself out there, what if I'm rejected? 00:00:34.079 --> 00:00:41.039 And so I'm not able to put myself out there in love because I'm nervous and I'm scared that I actually will be rejected. 00:00:41.359 --> 00:00:46.240 Fear consistently steals the light that we're actually supposed to offer the world. 00:00:46.399 --> 00:00:50.000 That there's a God that you can trust in, that you don't have to share the fears of the world. 00:00:50.079 --> 00:00:52.159 It's supposed to be this thing that Jesus is like. 00:00:52.240 --> 00:00:55.679 You get to live in a space where people look at you and be like, what is that? 00:00:55.840 --> 00:00:58.399 Like you don't share any of our worries. 00:00:58.560 --> 00:00:59.759 You don't share any of our fears. 00:00:59.840 --> 00:01:00.240 Why not? 00:01:00.320 --> 00:01:04.000 It's like, well, I the person I follow rules the universe. 00:01:04.159 --> 00:01:05.920 And so I think I'm okay. 00:01:06.079 --> 00:01:10.560 Like I think that's the that's the idea that Jesus was supposed to give to us. 00:01:10.799 --> 00:01:14.719 And so fear steals all of those things, and it's the one ingredient that steals all the stuff. 00:01:14.799 --> 00:01:15.519 So it makes sense. 00:01:15.840 --> 00:01:22.400 The most commanded thing in the scriptures, the thing that he says the most is like, do not fear, do not be afraid, fear not. 00:01:22.560 --> 00:01:24.319 He's constantly saying that to us. 00:01:24.560 --> 00:01:27.359 God does not want us as a people who follow him. 00:01:27.519 --> 00:01:31.599 He doesn't want us to be afraid because it leads us to a space where you can't actually follow him. 00:01:31.920 --> 00:01:33.680 You can't press into those things. 00:01:33.920 --> 00:01:42.480 And so what I want to look at today are three ways of battling our fears and overcoming those things. 00:01:42.560 --> 00:01:45.840 And without it sounding self-helpy, I hate self-help sermons. 00:01:45.920 --> 00:01:47.040 I'm not preaching one today. 00:01:47.200 --> 00:01:48.319 That's not my goal. 00:01:48.560 --> 00:01:52.959 But there is this space in the disciples where they are so fearful. 00:01:53.200 --> 00:01:58.239 And the reason is because they're lacking in these three ways of actually overcoming fears. 00:01:58.400 --> 00:01:59.920 You don't see what I'm about to talk about. 00:02:00.079 --> 00:02:02.079 You don't see any of these things in their lives. 00:02:02.159 --> 00:02:04.719 And you see Jesus trying to lead them into this space. 00:02:04.879 --> 00:02:07.120 And because it's not there, they're fearful. 00:02:07.359 --> 00:02:22.319 And so for us, I want to look at three ways of battling fear so that fear genuinely no longer has a grip in our lives, so that it's not the thing that defines our journey or guides our direction, but it's something that we experience and go, I see it for what it is, and I'm gonna move forward anyways. 00:02:22.479 --> 00:02:24.479 And so three ways of battling it, okay? 00:02:24.800 --> 00:02:26.319 Not a self-help sermon. 00:02:26.560 --> 00:02:26.960 All right. 00:02:27.199 --> 00:02:32.479 First, first way of battling your fear is we need to elevate our view of God. 00:02:32.960 --> 00:02:34.159 Elevate our view of God. 00:02:34.240 --> 00:02:40.240 We need a higher view of who God is than we have of the things that actually scare us. 00:02:40.479 --> 00:02:46.800 The problem with the disciples is they had a small view of Jesus, just a very low view of what he was capable of. 00:02:46.960 --> 00:02:48.719 We see it in verse 47 through 50. 00:02:48.800 --> 00:02:53.199 It says later that night, the boat was in the middle of the lake, and he was alone on the land. 00:02:53.360 --> 00:03:00.080 He saw Jesus, sees the disciples straining at the oars because of the wind, and then shortly before dawn he went out to them walking on the lake. 00:03:00.400 --> 00:03:07.039 He was about to pass them by, but when they saw him, they literally see him, walking on the lake, they thought, he's a ghost. 00:03:07.280 --> 00:03:10.800 And they cried out because they all saw him and were terrified. 00:03:11.039 --> 00:03:19.120 And so their fear, if you notice, their fear originates from having a small view of what is possible for Jesus to do. 00:03:19.360 --> 00:03:21.919 Jesus can't walk on water in their minds. 00:03:22.080 --> 00:03:25.039 And so even when they see him walking on water, they're like, that ain't him. 00:03:25.280 --> 00:03:27.520 That's not, I don't know what that is, but that's not him. 00:03:27.840 --> 00:03:29.759 They're out in the middle of the Sea of Galilee. 00:03:29.919 --> 00:03:32.159 Once again, they've had this experience before. 00:03:32.400 --> 00:03:37.439 The wind and the waves are churning up, and they're like, it's happening again. 00:03:37.599 --> 00:03:42.000 Like we're gonna be in another tsunami storm thing, like it's gonna happen again. 00:03:42.319 --> 00:03:46.800 But they have to be thinking, last time Jesus helped us, but last time he was in the boat. 00:03:46.960 --> 00:03:48.000 He was actually here with us. 00:03:48.080 --> 00:03:49.840 Now he's on the shore praying or something. 00:03:49.919 --> 00:03:50.800 I don't know what he's doing. 00:03:50.960 --> 00:03:52.479 Like he's not here with us. 00:03:52.639 --> 00:03:56.319 And so for them, they see their situation, and in many ways I think that we do the same thing. 00:03:56.479 --> 00:03:58.639 We see this situation and go, this one's different. 00:03:58.879 --> 00:04:02.080 He helped us last time, but I don't think he can do anything here. 00:04:02.240 --> 00:04:05.199 Jesus is powerless to do anything in this situation. 00:04:05.360 --> 00:04:09.199 God is powerless to do anything in this situation because this situation is different. 00:04:09.439 --> 00:04:13.039 This situation, this circumstance is worse than it was last time. 00:04:13.280 --> 00:04:16.000 God could help us last time, he can't help us this time. 00:04:16.160 --> 00:04:17.279 This one's bigger. 00:04:17.519 --> 00:04:25.040 Their view of Jesus is he can't help us out here, and they have zero expectation that he can do anything in this situation. 00:04:25.120 --> 00:04:32.319 And we know that because again, even when they physically see Jesus walking on the water, their minds don't go, oh, thank God, Jesus is here. 00:04:32.480 --> 00:04:35.519 They go, oh, look, a water demon that looks like Jesus. 00:04:35.759 --> 00:04:38.079 That's like to them, that's more reasonable. 00:04:38.240 --> 00:04:46.160 It's probably some random spirit, like just walking, that just transfigured into the image of Jesus, and it looks like him, but it's actually not him. 00:04:46.319 --> 00:04:53.600 Like they they just cannot, it's so far from their view that Jesus could ever walk on water that they have to make up some other thing. 00:04:53.680 --> 00:04:55.120 It's like he can't do that. 00:04:55.279 --> 00:04:56.160 And so what is this? 00:04:56.319 --> 00:04:58.639 Well, the most logical thing is water demon. 00:04:58.800 --> 00:04:59.759 That's the thing. 00:05:01.759 --> 00:05:10.000 William Lane in his commentary talks about their issue, and he says, the disciples had no categories for understanding Jesus' presence with them right there. 00:05:10.160 --> 00:05:15.600 That is why they displayed not confidence and joy in Jesus' unexpected presence, but faithless panic. 00:05:15.839 --> 00:05:21.759 They just didn't, they didn't have a view of him that's like, I bet he could just do whatever he wants. 00:05:21.839 --> 00:05:26.079 And so what they should have done, if they had a high view of God, they'd be like, I don't even know if he sees us. 00:05:26.160 --> 00:05:29.519 And it's like, oh, actually he did see you, and he's actually come to rescue you. 00:05:29.680 --> 00:05:36.720 And what they should have done is been like, look, not only is he coming towards us, he's walking on the waves that we're afraid of. 00:05:36.879 --> 00:05:42.560 They should have responded that way, but they had zero, like their view of him was high, but it wasn't as high as it should have been. 00:05:42.639 --> 00:05:43.759 It was too low for that. 00:05:44.079 --> 00:05:45.120 He cannot do that. 00:05:45.279 --> 00:05:51.199 And they decided for God what God could do versus allowing God to tell them, this is what I can actually do. 00:05:52.079 --> 00:05:55.600 And so, because of that, they were overcome with fear. 00:05:55.759 --> 00:06:00.079 That situation, this thing is scary and it's bigger than Jesus. 00:06:00.240 --> 00:06:02.240 Even God can't help me out here. 00:06:02.480 --> 00:06:08.720 And effectively, their fear came down to the question: who do you think God is and what do you think is possible for him? 00:06:09.279 --> 00:06:13.040 Their fear begins and ends, not with how big the fear is. 00:06:13.279 --> 00:06:18.560 It has everything to do with who do you think God is in this situation and what do you think he's capable of? 00:06:18.720 --> 00:06:23.439 And because they answered incorrectly, they wound up in a space of fear. 00:06:24.639 --> 00:06:26.240 And fear took over their reality. 00:06:26.399 --> 00:06:36.160 Jesus is standing right there, and instead of living in the real thing that's actually happening, their reality becomes a more fearful one, and then it just grows and grows and grows and grows. 00:06:36.240 --> 00:06:39.360 Now I'm not just scared of the waves and the water and the wind. 00:06:39.439 --> 00:06:42.000 I'm scared of the water demon walking towards me that looks like Jesus. 00:06:42.160 --> 00:06:44.399 Like their fear just takes a life of its own. 00:06:44.480 --> 00:06:45.920 And it's a fake reality. 00:06:46.079 --> 00:06:52.399 It's not even real, but they're making up a reality that's different than the actual reality because that's what fear does. 00:06:52.480 --> 00:06:58.560 It leads us into a space where ultimately takes us into a lie, and then we believe that lie and it takes over. 00:06:59.199 --> 00:07:00.800 I think this happens to us all the time. 00:07:00.959 --> 00:07:07.920 We face problems in our lives, we listen to the news, we face difficulties, struggles, and I'm not denying those things. 00:07:08.079 --> 00:07:18.720 The disciples were actually facing something difficult, but we face those things, and if those things tower over our view of God, fear is the only logical response. 00:07:18.959 --> 00:07:26.879 So if those scary things are bigger than our view of Him, and He isn't in control of those, He can't do anything in that space, then it actually makes sense. 00:07:27.040 --> 00:07:28.560 You should be very afraid. 00:07:29.600 --> 00:07:34.160 At the end of the day, our fear doesn't come down to how big the issue is, though. 00:07:34.240 --> 00:07:36.639 It comes down to our view of how big God actually is. 00:07:36.800 --> 00:07:38.319 Consistently, that is where it is. 00:07:38.480 --> 00:07:42.240 We have fear when it is bigger than he is, when he is too small for those things. 00:07:42.399 --> 00:07:43.120 This is why A.W. 00:07:43.279 --> 00:07:44.000 Tozer said this. 00:07:44.079 --> 00:07:51.040 He says, The person, the person who comes to a right belief about God is relieved of 10,000 temporal problems. 00:07:51.279 --> 00:08:00.480 The hard thing is, he doesn't, he goes on in this, but his whole book is trying to, knowledge of the holy, trying to get us to actually have a picture of God that's worthy of him. 00:08:00.879 --> 00:08:03.439 And the problem is we don't actually see him correctly. 00:08:03.600 --> 00:08:04.879 We have a wrong belief of God. 00:08:04.959 --> 00:08:06.720 We have a small one instead of a big one. 00:08:06.879 --> 00:08:10.480 And the disciples who lived with him had the exact same thing. 00:08:11.519 --> 00:08:14.800 The tragedy of a low view of Jesus is it leads us away from the truth. 00:08:14.879 --> 00:08:16.319 Again, you see this in the disciples. 00:08:16.480 --> 00:08:22.399 For the disciples in verse 47 and 48, what we know is that Jesus had seen them. 00:08:22.480 --> 00:08:27.519 It says Jesus saw them straining at the oar, so he sees them, and then he goes out to them. 00:08:27.759 --> 00:08:33.600 He's actually done that thing, and he is able to do something because when he enters into the boat, everything turns to peace. 00:08:33.840 --> 00:08:35.360 And so that's the reality. 00:08:35.440 --> 00:08:42.879 But the fear itself led them to believe like he doesn't see me, he does not care, and even if he did care, he can't do anything about it. 00:08:43.039 --> 00:08:47.360 And so it just steals from them this thing that they were supposed to live in, this confidence they were supposed to have. 00:08:47.600 --> 00:08:50.080 They should have been in the boat going, I know he sees me. 00:08:50.240 --> 00:08:52.720 He he told me that we he was gonna meet us on the other side. 00:08:52.799 --> 00:08:57.600 So I know I'm making it over there, I know that I'm not gonna be stuck here, I know that's gonna be true. 00:08:57.759 --> 00:09:00.399 And they should have seen him and been like, of course he's walking on the water. 00:09:00.480 --> 00:09:02.320 The man can do anything. 00:09:04.240 --> 00:09:06.480 We need a view of God that's worthy of him. 00:09:06.720 --> 00:09:13.759 Um, it's a view in my uh experience reading the Psalms, a person who does it really, really well is King David. 00:09:13.919 --> 00:09:20.000 David had this view of God that was, I think all of us should should lean towards and aspire towards. 00:09:20.080 --> 00:09:22.559 Uh look at Psalm 27 here. 00:09:22.799 --> 00:09:24.320 This is how David views the Lord. 00:09:24.399 --> 00:09:26.320 He says, The Lord is the stronghold of my life. 00:09:26.480 --> 00:09:27.679 Of whom shall I be afraid? 00:09:27.840 --> 00:09:28.799 Who should I be afraid? 00:09:28.960 --> 00:09:30.080 He's the stronghold of my life. 00:09:30.240 --> 00:09:33.919 When the wicked advance against me to devour me, it's them who are gonna stumble and fall. 00:09:34.080 --> 00:09:34.720 Let's go. 00:09:34.879 --> 00:09:37.200 Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear. 00:09:37.360 --> 00:09:39.679 Though war break out against me, even then I'm gonna be confident. 00:09:39.840 --> 00:09:42.240 For in the day of trouble, he's gonna keep me safe. 00:09:42.399 --> 00:09:45.519 He will hide me in the shelter of his tent, he will set me high upon a rock. 00:09:45.679 --> 00:09:47.360 So I will remain confident of this. 00:09:47.519 --> 00:09:49.759 I'm gonna see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. 00:09:49.919 --> 00:09:51.360 That bro was not afraid. 00:09:51.519 --> 00:09:53.679 Like he just had a different view of God. 00:09:53.759 --> 00:09:55.679 He's like, the enemies are coming, what should we do? 00:09:55.840 --> 00:09:56.720 It's like, watch this. 00:09:56.879 --> 00:10:04.720 Like he just knew he had this thing that like the Lord is going to protect me, and I feel that deeply in his heart, and he wrote this down all this all the time. 00:10:04.879 --> 00:10:11.679 Just like the one who delivers me, the God who is an adversary against my adversaries, but the God who is an advocate for me. 00:10:11.840 --> 00:10:14.080 And so we need this type of confidence. 00:10:14.240 --> 00:10:16.000 We need a view of him like that. 00:10:16.320 --> 00:10:19.279 Seeing him high and lifted up in a space where it's like, does he love me? 00:10:19.360 --> 00:10:20.720 Yes, he loves you beyond compare. 00:10:20.879 --> 00:10:21.759 He gave his life for you. 00:10:21.919 --> 00:10:22.720 Can he do things? 00:10:22.879 --> 00:10:24.080 Is he powerful enough in this? 00:10:24.240 --> 00:10:25.440 Does he still rule and reign? 00:10:25.600 --> 00:10:26.799 Yes, he still does. 00:10:27.039 --> 00:10:28.960 We need a view of him like that. 00:10:29.200 --> 00:10:31.600 We need to think of him in a way that's worthy of him. 00:10:31.759 --> 00:10:33.039 We need an elevated view of God. 00:10:33.200 --> 00:10:34.159 So that's the first. 00:10:34.320 --> 00:10:40.240 One of the ways that you get an elevated view of God, um, or two ways really, are the next two things. 00:10:40.399 --> 00:10:45.039 They're separate in their own right, but they also would build into an elevated view of God. 00:10:45.200 --> 00:10:45.840 So that's the first. 00:10:45.919 --> 00:10:47.279 We need an elevated view of God. 00:10:47.440 --> 00:10:48.799 Here's how we get it. 00:10:49.440 --> 00:10:51.440 We fix our eyes on the truth. 00:10:51.600 --> 00:10:52.639 That's the second thing. 00:10:52.799 --> 00:10:54.399 Fix your eyes on the truth. 00:10:54.639 --> 00:10:58.399 I said it already, but the disciples are believing a lie, believing a lie. 00:10:58.559 --> 00:11:03.120 Verse 49 and 50, they see Jesus walking on the lake, and they thought it's a ghost. 00:11:03.200 --> 00:11:06.320 And they cried out because they were all, they all saw him and were terrified. 00:11:06.559 --> 00:11:10.399 William Wayne in this commentary says this about this, why they thought this. 00:11:10.720 --> 00:11:16.399 So the disciples reacted to Jesus' appearance with terror, convinced that they had encountered a water spirit. 00:11:16.639 --> 00:11:23.200 The popular belief that spirits of the night brought disaster was a story in the rabbinic oral tradition. 00:11:23.360 --> 00:11:27.440 So basically, they've just been listening to the a story. 00:11:27.679 --> 00:11:29.679 It's the same for us just listening to the news. 00:11:29.840 --> 00:11:31.360 Like they've just been listening to the news. 00:11:31.440 --> 00:11:32.799 And the news have scared them. 00:11:32.960 --> 00:11:33.519 Anybody? 00:11:33.759 --> 00:11:35.279 Like, this is what's happened. 00:11:35.440 --> 00:11:41.279 They've just heard a story that they've never actually experienced whatsoever, and it's not actually happening in their time. 00:11:41.519 --> 00:11:44.799 And they're afraid of something that they've just heard that's taken over. 00:11:44.879 --> 00:11:48.799 And they have their eyes fixed on the news and not on Jesus Himself. 00:11:48.960 --> 00:11:50.960 And it's shaping everything that they see. 00:11:53.360 --> 00:11:54.960 Their fear is based on a lie. 00:11:55.039 --> 00:11:58.000 And so what Jesus does is he tries to fix their eyes on the truth. 00:11:58.240 --> 00:11:59.440 Verse 50, this is what he does. 00:11:59.519 --> 00:12:02.000 He says, Immediately, you're believing a lie. 00:12:02.240 --> 00:12:04.480 Immediately, he spoke to them and said, Take courage. 00:12:04.559 --> 00:12:05.759 It's I, it's me. 00:12:06.080 --> 00:12:07.360 Don't be afraid. 00:12:08.399 --> 00:12:10.559 You're believing a lie, it's terrifying you. 00:12:10.639 --> 00:12:11.840 You need to be reminded of the truth. 00:12:11.919 --> 00:12:17.360 And then he gives them the truth and says, You do not have to be afraid in this space because I'm right here. 00:12:19.360 --> 00:12:23.440 Don't be afraid of the lies that you've heard, the fears that are filling your mind. 00:12:23.519 --> 00:12:24.639 Fix your eyes on what's true. 00:12:24.799 --> 00:12:27.039 This is what he's constantly trying to do for them. 00:12:27.279 --> 00:12:28.000 Look at me. 00:12:28.159 --> 00:12:28.879 It is me. 00:12:29.039 --> 00:12:30.320 Focus on the truth here. 00:12:30.480 --> 00:12:32.080 Again, David does this so well. 00:12:32.240 --> 00:12:33.200 I love Psalm 11. 00:12:33.279 --> 00:12:44.480 I love the Psalms, but Psalm 11 is such a good description of like how King David does this because he is talking about people in his life that are telling him to be afraid. 00:12:44.639 --> 00:12:51.600 And you're gonna look and see what they're saying and just notice where their eyes are, and then you're gonna see David's response, and then you see where his eyes are. 00:12:51.759 --> 00:12:54.320 So Psalm 11, David says, In the Lord I take refuge. 00:12:54.480 --> 00:12:55.200 He starts again. 00:12:55.440 --> 00:12:58.399 How then can you say to me, flee like a bird to the mountains? 00:12:58.480 --> 00:13:05.200 And then here's what the people are saying, Because look, look where their eyes are, because look, the wicked are bending their bows. 00:13:05.360 --> 00:13:09.279 They set their arrows against the strings to shoot them from the shadows at the upright at heart. 00:13:09.440 --> 00:13:12.080 When the foundations are being destroyed, what can the righteous do? 00:13:12.240 --> 00:13:15.519 And so notice their eyes are not just like there's an enemy out there. 00:13:15.600 --> 00:13:16.639 It's very specific. 00:13:16.799 --> 00:13:18.159 They have studied the enemy. 00:13:18.320 --> 00:13:24.720 They are bending their bows, they're placing their arrow on the thing, like they are like very specific, studying the enemy. 00:13:24.799 --> 00:13:27.759 And then David, very specific, has studied the Lord. 00:13:28.000 --> 00:13:30.960 And the Lord, he and he says, the Lord is in his holy temple. 00:13:31.200 --> 00:13:32.080 He hasn't moved. 00:13:32.240 --> 00:13:35.120 My foundation can't move because he's the foundation. 00:13:35.360 --> 00:13:36.639 He cannot shift and change. 00:13:36.879 --> 00:13:39.759 The Lord is on his heavenly throne, foundation secure. 00:13:39.919 --> 00:13:42.960 He observes everyone on earth, his eyes examine them. 00:13:43.039 --> 00:13:47.279 The Lord examines the righteous, but the wicked, those who love violence, yeah, he hates them with a passion. 00:13:47.440 --> 00:13:50.159 And on the wicked he will reign fiery coals and burning sulfur. 00:13:50.320 --> 00:13:52.000 A scorching wind will be their lot. 00:13:52.320 --> 00:13:54.879 For the Lord is righteous, he loves justice, and guess what? 00:13:54.960 --> 00:13:56.159 The upright will see his face. 00:13:56.320 --> 00:14:00.559 And David just fixes his eyes on something true and something real. 00:14:00.720 --> 00:14:05.039 And so when the lies are coming in, you should flee, you should be afraid, you should focus on the enemy. 00:14:05.120 --> 00:14:08.240 He's like, I'm not going to focus on the things that you're afraid of. 00:14:08.320 --> 00:14:10.720 I'm actually going to keep my focus on actually what's true. 00:14:10.960 --> 00:14:12.240 The Lord is in his holy temple. 00:14:12.399 --> 00:14:16.960 The Lord, my foundation is secure because he cannot be removed from his throne. 00:14:17.360 --> 00:14:19.759 David has fixed his eyes on the truth. 00:14:21.279 --> 00:14:23.679 Jesus is trying in this particular space. 00:14:23.840 --> 00:14:30.320 Jesus is trying to do the exact same thing for the disciples, getting them to focus on the truth in order to fight against the fears that they have. 00:14:30.799 --> 00:14:32.879 Because our fears are lying to us. 00:14:33.120 --> 00:14:41.039 And so we need to fix our eyes on what's true in order to move us past our fears and move us towards a space where we actually experience some peace. 00:14:54.240 --> 00:14:58.159 Same as two weeks ago, like I never tell the story well, so just follow me. 00:14:59.840 --> 00:15:06.320 Worked at a church years and years ago, and left that church to go to Chicago. 00:15:06.559 --> 00:15:09.679 And for so many years, church was really great. 00:15:09.840 --> 00:15:15.279 And left that church and got a new job in Chicago at this other church. 00:15:15.440 --> 00:15:23.039 Rainey and I were almost, we're about to be married, and I got this job, which was a real gift because I was still in seminary, a full-time job at a church there. 00:15:23.279 --> 00:15:29.360 And uh for some reason, um the elders of that church um didn't like our family. 00:15:29.600 --> 00:15:42.080 Um honestly, uh, in some sense, we we weren't perfect in those situations, but like they made stuff up about us, and they were coming, they were gonna send the elders up to that church in order to try and get me fired from this job. 00:15:42.399 --> 00:15:56.879 And um I would talk to somebody that was in uh you know, kind of running that and a part of that, and uh, he was like, Man, I've tried everything, but they are hellbent, they're doing this thing, they're coming up there, they're gonna meet with your pastor, and they're trying their goal is to try and get you fired. 00:15:56.960 --> 00:15:57.919 And I was like, What did I do? 00:15:58.080 --> 00:16:04.080 And he was like, It doesn't matter what you did, they're just angry, and they're it's not really even about you, they're just angry. 00:16:04.480 --> 00:16:06.799 And so um, that was the news. 00:16:06.879 --> 00:16:08.639 It was like, they'll be there tomorrow. 00:16:08.799 --> 00:16:16.960 And uh, and so I tell Rainey, and it was very emotional because we felt like this job is gonna be like a launching point for our marriage into this space, and it was gonna be great. 00:16:17.200 --> 00:16:22.720 And uh it's just hard to hear that church people, Christians, if you ever been hurt by church people, join me. 00:16:22.960 --> 00:16:29.600 Um but it was this space where I was like, man, they're gonna come up here and they're gonna ruin this great opportunity that's happened for me. 00:16:29.759 --> 00:16:30.960 And so I was afraid. 00:16:31.120 --> 00:16:36.000 And we were sitting there in Panera parking lot in Chicago, about to go in and eat, and we had no money. 00:16:36.080 --> 00:16:39.039 Like it was like this is gonna be a full-time job, it's gonna change our whole lives. 00:16:39.120 --> 00:16:41.600 Like, we're gonna go from like, how much food can we get? 00:16:41.759 --> 00:16:54.960 Like, we'll split a bowl of soup, which I hate splitting food, you all sitting there in the parking lot, and then um we just start talking back and forth. 00:16:55.039 --> 00:16:58.480 It's like, well, the Lord has only ever been good to us. 00:16:58.720 --> 00:17:05.759 Like my relationship with Rainey was like of the people I could possibly marry. 00:17:06.000 --> 00:17:14.400 She was beyond the 10 of everyone in my life, and I'm like, I'm gonna aim high because I had proud parents and I just think I deserve more than I'm worth. 00:17:14.559 --> 00:17:19.279 Uh, you know, and so I just aimed as high as I possibly could trying to get Rainy. 00:17:19.599 --> 00:17:23.119 And uh just like I know that the odds are not in my favor. 00:17:23.200 --> 00:17:25.119 If this was Hunger Games, I'm dead first. 00:17:25.279 --> 00:17:27.200 It's not that was a young, sorry. 00:17:27.359 --> 00:17:29.839 Um the odds are not in my favor. 00:17:29.920 --> 00:17:36.880 And uh and then the Lord just did a thing and like it and made her fall in love with me, which I don't even think he can force her to do, but it's like it worked, right? 00:17:36.960 --> 00:17:38.480 And like we're together and we're gonna get married. 00:17:38.559 --> 00:17:41.279 I'm like, oh, I was six months away from locking this down. 00:17:41.359 --> 00:17:44.720 And uh so I was it was a space for me where I was like, man, what a gift. 00:17:44.799 --> 00:17:48.079 The Lord has always been good to us and he's done miraculous things in our lives. 00:17:48.319 --> 00:17:59.920 Um but one of the things that we we eventually are like, he has been good to us, and a couple of things that we said was like, I'm afraid, but if the Lord wants me to have this job, there's nothing they can say. 00:18:00.079 --> 00:18:01.839 There's nothing they can do. 00:18:02.319 --> 00:18:07.440 And so you don't need to be afraid because if he wants you to have this job, they can do whatever they want. 00:18:07.599 --> 00:18:13.039 I mean, they can but he just he is if he has opened the door, they cannot close it. 00:18:13.200 --> 00:18:15.519 And so let them come, they can do whatever they want. 00:18:15.680 --> 00:18:18.160 And I was like, just remind yourself of the truth of that. 00:18:18.319 --> 00:18:23.839 That like let them come and say whatever they want, because if he wants me to have this job, they will fight against him and they will lose. 00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:25.119 They cannot do it. 00:18:25.359 --> 00:18:37.279 And then if if they if if they do, if my the boss does believe the lies and I do lose this job, then the Lord is gonna care for me in the same way that he's cared for me the last 24 years of my life at that particular point. 00:18:37.440 --> 00:18:41.680 Like if he allows that to take place and like he's he's been faithful before, he'll be faithful again. 00:18:41.759 --> 00:18:42.960 This is who he is. 00:18:44.640 --> 00:18:53.920 And so we said that to one another, and then we went in and ate our two dollar soup or whatever, and uh, and just had some peace and some rest in the midst of some fears. 00:18:54.079 --> 00:18:56.960 And then eventually we got a call that night, and they were like, hey, we're not coming. 00:18:57.119 --> 00:18:59.599 It was from one of the other guys, and I was like, Oh, okay. 00:18:59.680 --> 00:19:07.599 Um, and it was just for us, like one space of worship where I was very thankful, but it was also a space of like, see, this fear was lying to you. 00:19:07.839 --> 00:19:14.640 And for me, it made me feel like they have control over my destiny, and I had to be reminded what's true. 00:19:14.720 --> 00:19:19.279 It's like they are not in control of your destiny, they can't get you fired if they want to. 00:19:19.359 --> 00:19:26.000 They can get you fired if the Lord goes, Yes, I will allow it, because everything bows the knee to him and everything has to go through him. 00:19:26.160 --> 00:19:37.839 And so it was just a space for us of like just reminding ourselves of the truth in the midst of the fear, but the fear gets so big and it so disillusions what we can see to where they see Jesus and they're like, It's a it's a water spirit. 00:19:37.920 --> 00:19:39.119 And it's like, no, it's him. 00:19:39.440 --> 00:19:41.680 And he's going, no, no, no, focus on the truth. 00:19:41.759 --> 00:19:42.319 It's me. 00:19:42.480 --> 00:19:45.839 I'm here with you, and I am here for you, and I have come here for you. 00:19:46.000 --> 00:19:46.960 That's what's true. 00:19:47.119 --> 00:19:51.519 And so, in our fears, we need to fix our eyes on what's true. 00:19:51.680 --> 00:19:55.279 Where our eyes are fixed determines where our emotions rest. 00:19:55.440 --> 00:20:06.400 And so, if you want to know where your emotions stay, if you're afraid, it's likely that your eyes are fixed on the fears and not on the God who is ruler and reigns above all those different things. 00:20:06.559 --> 00:20:07.759 All right, that's number two. 00:20:08.319 --> 00:20:13.519 Number three to battle our fears, we've got to reflect on past deeds of God. 00:20:13.680 --> 00:20:18.640 It's another thing that we did during that particular time at Panera, but reflect on past deeds of God. 00:20:18.880 --> 00:20:23.039 Mark points this out that this is something the disciples did not do and they should have. 00:20:23.200 --> 00:20:28.640 Verse 51 and 52 says, Then Jesus climbed into the boat and the wind died down. 00:20:28.880 --> 00:20:32.559 And they were the disciples were so baffled, they were beside themselves. 00:20:32.720 --> 00:20:34.880 Some of your translations may say that they were amazed. 00:20:35.039 --> 00:20:36.160 It's a bad translation. 00:20:36.480 --> 00:20:45.039 It does mean amazed in certain spaces, but when it's used negatively, it means it's what Jesus' parents and brothers, when they say that he's crazy, they use this exact same word. 00:20:45.119 --> 00:20:47.200 They're like, hey, he's messed up in the head. 00:20:47.279 --> 00:20:47.920 That's what they're saying. 00:20:48.000 --> 00:20:53.920 And so what Mark is trying to say about the disciples here is not that they're amazed in wonder, but they're actually like beside themselves in fear. 00:20:54.079 --> 00:20:55.359 It's like, what the heck is happening? 00:20:55.519 --> 00:20:56.079 I'm confused. 00:20:56.240 --> 00:20:59.599 And so they were baffled and they were beside themselves. 00:20:59.759 --> 00:21:02.880 For they did not, and here's why, they did not consider the loaves. 00:21:03.039 --> 00:21:04.480 Their hearts were hardened. 00:21:04.799 --> 00:21:04.960 N. 00:21:05.119 --> 00:21:05.200 T. 00:21:05.359 --> 00:21:06.000 Wright says this. 00:21:06.079 --> 00:21:18.160 He says, Mark seems to be stressing Jesus' sovereignty over the natural world, and that if the disciples had reflected on the loaves and the fishes, they might have realized that water wouldn't be too much of a problem either. 00:21:18.400 --> 00:21:25.680 Like if they have just processed this thing that just happened, Jesus just fed 5,000 plus with two fish and a couple of loaves. 00:21:26.720 --> 00:21:34.880 If they had reached back into redemptive history and pulled that forward into their current circumstance, they would have seen Jesus walking on the water and been like, this, this is this lines up. 00:21:35.039 --> 00:21:35.920 This makes a ton of sense. 00:21:36.079 --> 00:21:36.880 He's a crazy guy. 00:21:36.960 --> 00:21:37.839 I don't know, he'll do anything. 00:21:37.920 --> 00:21:39.119 I have no idea what he's gonna do. 00:21:39.279 --> 00:21:42.240 He wants us to feed 5,000 plus with a couple loaves and some fish. 00:21:42.319 --> 00:21:42.960 Like, this is wild. 00:21:43.039 --> 00:21:44.000 Of course he's walking on water. 00:21:44.079 --> 00:21:46.240 And he writes, but Mark is making that point. 00:21:46.400 --> 00:21:53.920 They didn't consider this, and because they didn't consider the past and bring it into their future, they're completely confused and they're riddled with fear. 00:21:54.240 --> 00:21:59.839 They had seen Jesus cast out demons, they'd seen Jesus heal the sick, they had seen Jesus regrowing. 00:22:00.160 --> 00:22:02.880 Limbs and facial parts of a leper. 00:22:03.039 --> 00:22:06.559 They've seen Jesus raise a dead girl to life. 00:22:06.720 --> 00:22:10.400 They'd seen Jesus feed 5,000 plus with five loaves and two fish. 00:22:10.559 --> 00:22:18.160 And because, as Mark says, they didn't consider any of it, their best guess was when they see Jesus, I think it's a water demon who looks like Jesus. 00:22:18.319 --> 00:22:19.920 That's their best guess. 00:22:20.160 --> 00:22:25.519 And it's like, it's because you did not consider any of the things that's happened in the past. 00:22:25.920 --> 00:22:31.119 Any of the miracles didn't come to their present circumstance and inform anything. 00:22:31.279 --> 00:22:41.359 Rabbi Lawrence Kushner says this, he says in the study of knowledge and epistemology, if a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it, it may or may not make a sound. 00:22:41.599 --> 00:22:43.839 But he says it does not work that way with miracles. 00:22:44.000 --> 00:22:49.519 Spiritually, if a miracle happens and no one takes notice, it did not happen. 00:22:49.759 --> 00:22:59.680 If no one takes notice of what God has done in your life or in history past, if he does something for you and you miss it completely, it's as if it didn't happen at all. 00:22:59.839 --> 00:23:01.200 It makes no noise in your heart. 00:23:01.279 --> 00:23:02.880 It does nothing for you in your present. 00:23:03.039 --> 00:23:04.480 And that's what Mark is showing here. 00:23:04.559 --> 00:23:08.160 Because they did not consider it, it had no effect on their fears. 00:23:08.319 --> 00:23:10.640 It had no effect on anything that they were dealing with. 00:23:10.880 --> 00:23:21.680 According to Mark, what's available for us is an arsenal of stories that are weapons against our fears, past stories that need to be brought forward to inform our current fears. 00:23:21.839 --> 00:23:26.079 Things that he's been faithful to do before that he has promised I will be faithful to do again. 00:23:26.240 --> 00:23:35.519 And Mark is saying the disciples didn't do that, and so fear is winning, and it's taking over and it's leading them to a space that's a non-reality, not the actual one that they live in. 00:23:35.680 --> 00:23:41.599 Fear is winning, and it shouldn't be if they would just consider the loaves, if they would just consider what had happened in the past. 00:23:41.839 --> 00:23:46.720 And so for us, I think we need to establish this practice of drawing upon our history with God. 00:23:46.799 --> 00:23:49.279 And if you don't have one, start marking one down. 00:23:49.599 --> 00:23:54.880 Drawing upon your history with God, drawing upon past faithfulness in order to relieve our present fears. 00:23:55.119 --> 00:23:57.680 Past faithfulness to relieve present fears. 00:23:57.920 --> 00:24:04.960 Charles Spurgeon talks about this and he says, we need the common habit of pleading past mercies as a ground for present favor. 00:24:05.359 --> 00:24:08.880 Review our Ebenezers or times and spaces where God has broken in. 00:24:09.039 --> 00:24:11.839 Review our Ebenezers and take comfort from them. 00:24:12.079 --> 00:24:16.799 It is not to be imagined that he who has helped us in six troubles will leave us in the seventh. 00:24:16.960 --> 00:24:21.039 God does nothing by halves, and he will never cease to help us until we cease having need. 00:24:21.279 --> 00:24:24.559 He will never cease to help you until you cease being in need. 00:24:24.880 --> 00:24:28.400 And so that's who he is, and we need to have this common practice of pleading. 00:24:28.559 --> 00:24:29.599 You have done this before. 00:24:29.680 --> 00:24:31.039 I'm asking you to do it again. 00:24:31.200 --> 00:24:36.640 And you are the same then as you were today, and I need that to happen again in my day. 00:24:36.880 --> 00:24:45.519 To me, and just in my experience, and I think just in my life, how we normally try to calm our fears is not by looking in the past, we try worrying forward. 00:24:45.680 --> 00:24:52.400 We try and like look to every, I have an Enneagram six wife who I love and is more spiritual than I am. 00:24:52.640 --> 00:25:05.279 But in in this uh space, like one of the things uh sixes do is they um naturally uh consider all the negative possible outcomes that could possibly happen. 00:25:05.440 --> 00:25:08.480 Okay, this is how people, I think how many people do it. 00:25:08.640 --> 00:25:16.480 We worry forward, we consider the negative possible outcomes, we consider all the worst case scenarios so that we can be prepared, so that we can avoid those things. 00:25:16.559 --> 00:25:19.839 And so we look to the future and go, this could happen, this could happen, this can happen, this can happen, this one. 00:25:20.160 --> 00:25:23.119 And we try based on that to actually calm our fears. 00:25:23.200 --> 00:25:27.519 The issue is you are using worry to try and stop your fears. 00:25:27.680 --> 00:25:31.200 And all you've done is add worry to the fear that you did. 00:25:31.359 --> 00:25:35.839 All you did was take a bad thing and then just add another bad thing to that thing. 00:25:36.000 --> 00:25:39.680 Worrying forward doesn't take away your fears, it just adds worry to your fear. 00:25:39.839 --> 00:25:46.000 And what Mark is saying is that in order to battle our fears, we need to look backwards in faith, not forward in fear. 00:25:46.160 --> 00:25:56.640 The way that you actually conquer these things and not be ruled by them is not trying to figure out how you can avoid the fearful things in your future or in your present, but to look back and go, what did he do before? 00:25:56.799 --> 00:25:57.759 What did he do in my life? 00:25:57.839 --> 00:25:58.720 What did he do in their life? 00:25:58.799 --> 00:25:59.839 What did he do in the scriptures? 00:25:59.920 --> 00:26:01.440 What did he do in spaces like this? 00:26:01.519 --> 00:26:07.839 And then grab that thing and pull it to the future and say, like, I'm claiming the promise that you have done this before and you will do it again. 00:26:08.079 --> 00:26:13.359 Versus going, like, I don't know, I maybe he will, I don't know if he's the same, I don't know if this is the same situation. 00:26:13.519 --> 00:26:25.599 Mark is saying, you should consider the things that happened in the past, bring them to your current circumstance, allow those things to inform your fears and to not have your fears inform what God can do in that particular space. 00:26:26.799 --> 00:26:28.720 This is what he wants for us. 00:26:29.680 --> 00:26:33.279 Use our past in order to inform our present. 00:26:33.599 --> 00:26:40.720 Frederick Biekner, in his book, The Hungering Dark, he says, one life on this earth is all we get. 00:26:40.960 --> 00:26:44.000 Whether it's enough or not enough, that's all we get. 00:26:44.240 --> 00:26:51.759 And the obvious conclusion would seem to be that at the very least, we are fools if we do not live it as fully and bravely and as beautifully as we can. 00:26:52.079 --> 00:26:52.960