WEBVTT 00:00:00.080 --> 00:00:12.160 I want to take a second just to thank everyone that works behind the scenes to make Sundays happen because uh it takes like 800 something man hours just to make every Sunday that we we have together occur. 00:00:12.320 --> 00:00:17.280 And and so many of those people are are in roles that no one ever even sees, no one ever realizes. 00:00:17.519 --> 00:00:24.239 You don't think about the fact that there's a group of people that come early every morning to set up all the Lord's Supper and all the juice and all that kind of stuff. 00:00:24.399 --> 00:00:25.600 That stuff goes unnoticed. 00:00:25.760 --> 00:00:27.120 And a lot of those people like that. 00:00:27.199 --> 00:00:31.039 So we want to take a second just to put our hands together for all of our behind-the-scenes people. 00:00:35.280 --> 00:00:49.439 And uh and you know, if you ever want to be on one of those teams or any team, you just sign up at the Connect Desk in the main lobby on your way out, and and they've got a great team of people there that will help you find a fit because no matter how you're wired, there's a team here that fits you. 00:00:49.520 --> 00:00:51.359 And it might be one of those behind-the-scenes teams. 00:00:51.439 --> 00:00:55.439 They get to do a lot of really cool stuff, and so feel free to sign up for those this morning. 00:00:55.520 --> 00:00:58.240 Uh, if it's your first time here, I want to start by saying welcome to His Hands. 00:00:58.320 --> 00:00:59.920 We are excited to have you with us. 00:01:00.079 --> 00:01:02.640 Uh, this church is all about one thing: loving people to Jesus. 00:01:02.799 --> 00:01:08.719 We believe that if people get a taste of God's love for them, they will want more, and there is so much more of that. 00:01:09.200 --> 00:01:13.840 And so everything we do here is to help people get his love, grow in his love, and give that away. 00:01:14.079 --> 00:01:20.959 If you are new or relatively new, even if you've only been coming for a few months, after the service today, we have what we call a newcomer Q ⁇ A. 00:01:21.040 --> 00:01:21.760 And it's really simple. 00:01:21.840 --> 00:01:24.000 It's in room two, which is right in our main hallway. 00:01:24.079 --> 00:01:26.799 If you ran right through the back of this room, you'd be there. 00:01:26.879 --> 00:01:35.120 Uh, 15 minutes or so just for you to find out more about the church, how we got started, what what we're all about, what makes things kind of tick here at his hands. 00:01:35.280 --> 00:01:35.760 I'll be there. 00:01:35.920 --> 00:01:38.879 It'll be a great chance for me to meet you, and you can ask me anything. 00:01:38.959 --> 00:01:42.560 You can grill me, you can bring out some some real tough questions if you want. 00:01:42.719 --> 00:01:44.480 I mean, please don't, but you can. 00:01:44.640 --> 00:01:49.359 Um, I'll answer them because we're open books here and we we love we love talking to people, getting to know people. 00:01:49.439 --> 00:01:53.519 So stick around for that if you'd like to know more about this place, if you're a newcomer. 00:01:53.680 --> 00:01:59.519 Um, I want to say a big thank you to everyone who's helping out, everyone who serves and prays and gives financially. 00:01:59.680 --> 00:02:02.079 Nathan mentioned this verse uh a little bit ago. 00:02:02.239 --> 00:02:09.599 He said that our real worship according to God, according to the Bible, is that we see our whole lives as kind of living sacrifices. 00:02:09.840 --> 00:02:16.319 And we see everything that we are and everything that we have as something that God can use to help people, to bless people. 00:02:16.560 --> 00:02:19.039 And you guys are are amazing examples of that. 00:02:19.199 --> 00:02:22.879 You you guys, you give, you're generous, you're kind, you pray. 00:02:23.120 --> 00:02:25.840 And so we don't pass a plate or anything like that if you're new. 00:02:25.919 --> 00:02:29.360 There are four columns in the back of the room where you can support us financially. 00:02:29.520 --> 00:02:33.439 Every week I say thank you for that because it it helps things work here in a big way. 00:02:33.520 --> 00:02:36.240 We have bills just like everybody else, but you guys are so generous and kind. 00:02:36.319 --> 00:02:36.960 It's awesome. 00:02:37.120 --> 00:02:42.560 And uh I'm really excited here soon to give an update of how much we've been able to give away this year as a church. 00:02:42.639 --> 00:02:49.120 I I'm pretty confident that we're gonna shatter our record in terms of how much we've been able to give away to the community this year. 00:02:49.199 --> 00:02:51.360 And so um, it's exciting to do that. 00:02:51.439 --> 00:02:52.400 I love getting to share that with you. 00:02:52.479 --> 00:02:53.120 I'll do it soon. 00:02:53.199 --> 00:02:55.599 Uh, but pray with me and let's jump into the message this morning. 00:02:55.759 --> 00:02:59.919 Jesus, thank you so much for uh for everything you are. 00:03:00.319 --> 00:03:01.759 Thank you so much for being here. 00:03:01.919 --> 00:03:04.639 Thank you for speaking your life into us. 00:03:04.719 --> 00:03:10.800 And we ask right now, God, that you would just open our minds and open our hearts so that we can receive what you want to teach us through your word. 00:03:11.199 --> 00:03:13.680 Um, just help our lives to be better. 00:03:13.919 --> 00:03:18.400 Help us live lives that we're we're proud of because we know we're living those lives for you. 00:03:18.479 --> 00:03:19.759 We ask this in your name, Jesus. 00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:20.560 Amen. 00:03:20.879 --> 00:03:21.280 Amen. 00:03:21.360 --> 00:03:23.439 Well, I was gone last week and I missed you guys. 00:03:23.680 --> 00:03:27.199 Ken was here, and if you were here last week, he gave an unbelievable message. 00:03:27.280 --> 00:03:30.479 So if you weren't able to make it, listen to it online, get caught up. 00:03:30.639 --> 00:03:33.680 I was out of town because I started a little tradition with my son. 00:03:33.759 --> 00:03:41.120 My son Liam is five, and you know, I've got Lily who's about to be two, and then Judah is still incubating, he's still getting ready to come. 00:03:41.280 --> 00:03:44.080 And so I want to I want to have a tradition with each of my kids. 00:03:44.159 --> 00:03:48.000 I just want there to be something that we do that's just it's just between the two of us. 00:03:48.080 --> 00:03:53.919 That every year I can I can take my kids somewhere and we can just have we can just have a tradition, something we enjoy. 00:03:54.000 --> 00:03:56.080 And so this year we started one, Liam and I. 00:03:56.240 --> 00:04:02.080 We left town last week, we drove to North Carolina to go to Duke's basketball season kickoff event. 00:04:02.319 --> 00:04:06.080 And uh now hold on, I know some of you are judging me right now. 00:04:06.319 --> 00:04:07.280 I know that. 00:04:07.680 --> 00:04:14.319 And all sports things aside, by the way, Duke football is ranked this year, so just you know, in case you didn't know, it's pretty rare when that happens. 00:04:14.560 --> 00:04:19.759 But you who know me might be thinking, that sounds like a good Justin trip, right? 00:04:19.920 --> 00:04:20.959 That sounds a little selfish. 00:04:21.040 --> 00:04:31.680 I thought this was supposed to be something for your son, but I will let you know as you judge me, okay, that there is nothing wrong with training your children to love what you love at all. 00:04:32.399 --> 00:04:33.519 It's just wisdom. 00:04:33.759 --> 00:04:36.079 I've been doing that since Liam was born. 00:04:36.240 --> 00:04:37.439 I've been doing that since he was born. 00:04:37.519 --> 00:04:40.959 I mean, literally, we have watched Duke games together since he was a baby. 00:04:41.040 --> 00:04:45.199 Uh, in fact, one of the first things he would say proudly when we were when he was really little was go gook. 00:04:45.279 --> 00:04:47.120 He couldn't say D's, so it was go gook. 00:04:47.199 --> 00:04:48.720 And if we'd say, What about North Carolina? 00:04:48.800 --> 00:04:50.160 Because I'm a Duke fan, he'd go, boo. 00:04:50.560 --> 00:04:52.000 And this is like Liam at one. 00:04:52.399 --> 00:04:53.839 Okay, so he was thrilled. 00:04:53.920 --> 00:04:54.639 He was so excited. 00:04:54.720 --> 00:04:59.920 He got to be on the court, he got to stand there, he got to meet a player, get his picture taken with the player. 00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:02.959 I mean, he had the time of his life. 00:05:03.199 --> 00:05:07.439 There was this one moment, though, on the trip where I was in a little bit of a moral crisis. 00:05:07.680 --> 00:05:14.079 Those of you with kids or who have raised kids, you've been in this situation before, where your kids ask you a serious question. 00:05:14.319 --> 00:05:20.079 They're asking you about something they want to be, something they want to become, and it's something big like being the president or an astronaut or something. 00:05:20.240 --> 00:05:23.680 Liam looked at me and said, Dad, can I play for Duke one day? 00:05:23.920 --> 00:05:28.399 And see, the real answer to that question, the honest answer is, well, it it depends. 00:05:28.639 --> 00:05:28.959 Right? 00:05:29.040 --> 00:05:30.000 Because it depends on a lot. 00:05:30.160 --> 00:05:34.720 If you want to be an athlete at that level, like I'm 5'9, I have not helped him out. 00:05:35.040 --> 00:05:35.360 Okay? 00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:41.360 He's got a grandfather that's 6'5, so if he can find a way to tap into that DNA, it's gonna help him. 00:05:41.439 --> 00:05:51.360 But it also depends on how talented he is, it depends on how athletic he is, it depends on how much he practices and works, and it depends on his exposure, it depends on a lot. 00:05:51.519 --> 00:05:55.360 So the honest answer to that question is I don't know, son. 00:05:55.680 --> 00:05:57.519 The odds are not in your favor. 00:05:58.800 --> 00:06:00.639 But you don't say that to children. 00:06:00.800 --> 00:06:02.639 You lie to them, right? 00:06:02.800 --> 00:06:04.480 You say, of course you can. 00:06:04.720 --> 00:06:07.279 You can do anything you set your mind to. 00:06:07.920 --> 00:06:08.959 And there's truth to that. 00:06:09.120 --> 00:06:09.759 We can do so much. 00:06:09.839 --> 00:06:16.160 I mean, God made us as people that are, it's unbelievable what a person can accomplish if they they have a will and they set their mind to something. 00:06:16.480 --> 00:06:18.800 God can do anything he sets his mind to. 00:06:18.959 --> 00:06:27.519 We can do a lot of things we set our minds to, but that statement, you can do anything that you set your mind to, it's not, it's not a hundred percent true. 00:06:27.839 --> 00:06:29.120 Childhood is a lot like that. 00:06:29.199 --> 00:06:41.680 There are many things we're taught growing up that we hear, and no one was trying to lie to us, no one was trying to manipulate us, they were trying to inspire and motivate us, but they told us things that just aren't fully accurate. 00:06:42.079 --> 00:06:45.680 Like I was told growing up that the bigger they are, the harder they fall. 00:06:46.000 --> 00:06:52.399 And when I was in the eighth grade, I was probably five, six or so, I got in a fight with a kid who ironically was six foot three. 00:06:52.560 --> 00:06:54.079 That's the size I wanted to be. 00:06:54.240 --> 00:06:56.399 You know, that whole you can do anything you set your mind to. 00:06:56.639 --> 00:06:58.399 I wanted to be six, three. 00:06:58.560 --> 00:06:59.040 Didn't happen. 00:06:59.120 --> 00:07:00.879 I set my mind to that, never worked out. 00:07:01.040 --> 00:07:02.319 He was six foot three. 00:07:02.399 --> 00:07:05.920 I punched him and he didn't fall hard. 00:07:06.240 --> 00:07:09.920 He punched me back and I fell very hard. 00:07:10.800 --> 00:07:13.759 And so it was more like the bigger they are, the harder they hit. 00:07:13.839 --> 00:07:16.560 That was a more accurate statement. 00:07:16.639 --> 00:07:19.439 But I grew up being told the bigger they are, the harder they fall. 00:07:19.600 --> 00:07:24.639 My favorite, bar none, is a phrase that I know you can repeat, I know you can finish this sentence. 00:07:24.720 --> 00:07:28.720 Um, sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will what? 00:07:29.360 --> 00:07:31.120 Whatever, right? 00:07:32.319 --> 00:07:34.959 Words will never hurt me. 00:07:35.680 --> 00:07:42.000 If you break a bone, it will heal back, and it'll heal back stronger than it was before most times. 00:07:42.240 --> 00:07:46.800 But I have things that people said to me 20 years ago that still sting a little bit. 00:07:47.040 --> 00:07:53.839 Now I can think of things that someone said to me in middle school, which still come to my mind from time to time. 00:07:53.920 --> 00:07:57.120 As I've gotten older, I've learned that, okay, hold on, that shouldn't bother you. 00:07:57.199 --> 00:08:03.360 You should forgive that person, you should have a different perspective, but but it's ludicrous to say that words don't hurt. 00:08:04.639 --> 00:08:08.079 Words cut deeper than pretty much anything else. 00:08:08.160 --> 00:08:10.800 Listen to the way that the book of James puts this. 00:08:10.959 --> 00:08:19.839 James chapter 3, verse 2 says, indeed, we all make many mistakes, for if we could control our tongues, we would be perfect and could also control ourselves in every other way. 00:08:20.319 --> 00:08:30.720 We can make a large horse go wherever we want by means of a small bit in its mouth, and a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even though the winds are strong. 00:08:30.959 --> 00:08:38.320 In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches, but a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. 00:08:38.559 --> 00:08:41.600 And among all the parts of the body, the tongue is a flame of fire. 00:08:41.679 --> 00:08:44.399 It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. 00:08:44.480 --> 00:08:50.559 It can set your whole life on fire, for it itself is set on fire by hell. 00:08:51.759 --> 00:08:54.799 Our words are powerful. 00:08:55.039 --> 00:08:58.559 So powerful, in fact, that James says they are dangerous. 00:08:58.720 --> 00:09:03.759 Our words have the ability to cut down, our words have the ability to destroy. 00:09:04.639 --> 00:09:06.320 Our words define us. 00:09:07.360 --> 00:09:09.279 The last month we've been in a series called Defined. 00:09:09.519 --> 00:09:12.320 We're looking at the choices that we make that define our lives. 00:09:12.399 --> 00:09:16.320 It is not our circumstances, it is not the situations that we face that define us. 00:09:16.399 --> 00:09:19.919 It is how we choose, how we decide to respond. 00:09:20.720 --> 00:09:22.240 Jesus' life was no different. 00:09:22.320 --> 00:09:24.399 His life was defined not by his hardships. 00:09:24.559 --> 00:09:25.759 Those did not shape him. 00:09:26.000 --> 00:09:30.879 It was the decisions Jesus made amidst his hardships that defined who he was. 00:09:30.960 --> 00:09:37.840 And very few choices you will make in life will define you as much as your choice of words. 00:09:38.960 --> 00:09:41.919 The words you speak define you for one main reason. 00:09:42.080 --> 00:09:44.000 Your words outlive you. 00:09:45.360 --> 00:09:49.440 Your words carry on after your life is finished. 00:09:49.600 --> 00:09:54.559 One of my favorite things is stumbling across amazing quotes by people in the past. 00:09:54.639 --> 00:10:02.240 If I read something that someone said a few hundred years ago, but it was so true and so meaningful that people are still saying it today, that just, I don't know, that speaks to me. 00:10:02.320 --> 00:10:02.960 I get excited. 00:10:03.120 --> 00:10:05.440 When I read books, I always underline quotes. 00:10:05.519 --> 00:10:06.559 I love quotes. 00:10:07.679 --> 00:10:10.639 People said something ages ago and they're remembered for it. 00:10:10.799 --> 00:10:16.080 Have you ever asked yourself, what do I want to be remembered for saying? 00:10:17.360 --> 00:10:21.759 When my life is done, what do I want to be remembered for saying? 00:10:23.360 --> 00:10:25.840 Make no mistake, your words will outlive you. 00:10:25.919 --> 00:10:40.639 There are things you will say to friends, there are things you will say to your children, there are things you'll say to people around you, and your words to them will live with them even after your life is done. 00:10:40.960 --> 00:10:44.480 What do you want to be remembered for saying? 00:10:45.919 --> 00:10:48.159 See, we live in a culture that tells us words are trivial. 00:10:48.240 --> 00:10:50.639 That's the basic message of that sticks and stones thing. 00:10:50.720 --> 00:10:53.679 Words don't really matter that much, so you shouldn't let them bother you because they're trivial. 00:10:53.840 --> 00:10:56.000 That's why we have phrases in our culture that are so common. 00:10:56.159 --> 00:10:58.240 Phrases like, I didn't mean it. 00:10:58.639 --> 00:11:03.360 We say something and then we just say, No, no, I didn't mean it, and that's supposed to undo what we said. 00:11:03.519 --> 00:11:06.080 Or we'll say things like, It came out wrong. 00:11:06.320 --> 00:11:09.120 I'm so sorry, it came out wrong. 00:11:10.320 --> 00:11:12.639 We'll say things like, I take it back. 00:11:13.200 --> 00:11:14.080 I take it back. 00:11:14.159 --> 00:11:15.279 What I said, I take it back. 00:11:15.360 --> 00:11:18.399 And if you're a man and you're like me, what you say often is just what did I say? 00:11:18.559 --> 00:11:19.600 What did I say? 00:11:19.840 --> 00:11:21.600 Please tell me, because I don't know what I said. 00:11:21.759 --> 00:11:24.480 I know I said something wrong, but I just don't know what it was. 00:11:25.360 --> 00:11:26.480 And we live in this culture. 00:11:26.559 --> 00:11:27.519 I say things like that all the time. 00:11:27.679 --> 00:11:28.159 I take it back. 00:11:28.320 --> 00:11:29.840 Oh, I wish I I could take that back. 00:11:30.000 --> 00:11:32.879 I have said so many things in my life. 00:11:33.279 --> 00:11:45.200 Where as soon as the words came out, the first thing I thought was, oh no, I wish I could rewind time and just punch myself or sew my mouth shut something, because I am the king of putting my foot in my mouth. 00:11:45.440 --> 00:11:50.080 I know some of us in the room would raise our hands and say, Yeah, I'm good at that too, but I'm like really good at it. 00:11:50.240 --> 00:11:54.480 My whole life, I just haven't had much of a filter between my brain and my mouth. 00:11:54.639 --> 00:11:56.639 There's just not a natural one there. 00:11:56.799 --> 00:11:58.960 Something went wrong in my childhood. 00:11:59.039 --> 00:12:03.360 I don't know what happened, but I just say whatever's on my mind, and that gets me in trouble. 00:12:03.600 --> 00:12:05.440 I have no idea how my wife married me. 00:12:05.519 --> 00:12:06.399 I don't know. 00:12:06.720 --> 00:12:09.120 Because even before we dated, I put my foot in my mouth. 00:12:09.279 --> 00:12:14.720 Megan and I went to high school together, and I noticed her really quickly because she was impossible not to notice. 00:12:14.799 --> 00:12:17.600 I mean, she was beautiful and talented, she's really athletic. 00:12:17.679 --> 00:12:19.919 She was a three-time All-state volleyball player, right? 00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:22.320 She was, she's just awesome at everything. 00:12:22.399 --> 00:12:31.120 And so I saw Megan, she was incredible and out of my league, but you know, I was a boy, and we have this tendency to reach for the stars when it comes to relationships. 00:12:31.200 --> 00:12:35.519 And some of you women here know that because you're looking at your husband going, like, I'm way more attractive than him. 00:12:35.600 --> 00:12:36.879 What did I, why? 00:12:37.120 --> 00:12:39.840 I could have I could have held out for more, but you you didn't. 00:12:40.080 --> 00:12:42.159 So that's our hope as men. 00:12:44.000 --> 00:12:51.840 And so when Megan was about a sophomore in high school, this is a few years before we started dating, I noticed her and I wanted to I wanted to make an impression. 00:12:52.000 --> 00:12:55.759 And so she was wearing this warmup that went with her volleyball uniform. 00:12:55.919 --> 00:12:58.960 Whenever the girls would play, they would wear their warmups to school. 00:12:59.120 --> 00:13:01.200 And on the front of her warm-up was a nickname. 00:13:01.279 --> 00:13:04.879 All the girls had nicknames stitched on their warmups, and hers was frosty. 00:13:05.120 --> 00:13:06.879 And so I thought, okay, this is my chance. 00:13:06.960 --> 00:13:09.039 I can say something cute, I can kind of make an impression. 00:13:09.120 --> 00:13:13.840 And so I walked up to her, you know, just bringing my A game, which wasn't much as a sophomore. 00:13:14.000 --> 00:13:22.399 Um I was really good at the chasing girls thing in elementary school and like poking them and pushing them, and that was my way of flirting, and I just couldn't figure out adolescence. 00:13:22.639 --> 00:13:25.440 Once that was no longer acceptable, I didn't know what to do. 00:13:25.600 --> 00:13:26.799 So I just talked. 00:13:26.960 --> 00:13:31.120 And I walked up to Megan and I said, Hey, Rosty, huh? 00:13:31.279 --> 00:13:32.320 That's a good nickname. 00:13:32.399 --> 00:13:32.879 I like that. 00:13:33.039 --> 00:13:34.320 Uh I get it, I get it. 00:13:34.399 --> 00:13:36.000 I have pale skin too. 00:13:37.360 --> 00:13:37.919 Yeah. 00:13:38.159 --> 00:13:42.080 So I learned that day that women do not like to be told they're pale. 00:13:42.320 --> 00:13:42.720 Right? 00:13:42.879 --> 00:13:43.440 I don't mind. 00:13:43.519 --> 00:13:45.039 I have the complexion of Elmer's glue. 00:13:45.120 --> 00:13:46.559 It does not bother me at all. 00:13:46.720 --> 00:13:48.559 Um, I thought that was a connection we had. 00:13:48.639 --> 00:13:52.960 I assume that that's why they called her Frosty, because Megan is very fair-skinned. 00:13:53.120 --> 00:13:56.080 Fair-skinned is different than pale-skinned. 00:13:56.320 --> 00:13:57.200 I learned that. 00:13:57.360 --> 00:13:59.279 But that wasn't why they called her Frosty. 00:13:59.360 --> 00:14:04.000 It had to do with some highlighting technique she did to her hair, and she let me know that. 00:14:04.639 --> 00:14:06.399 That was a good moment for me. 00:14:06.639 --> 00:14:14.399 Uh two years later, she had forgotten enough about that that she said yes to a date, but man, I put my foot in my mouth all the time. 00:14:14.559 --> 00:14:17.919 I say things that get me in trouble. 00:14:18.639 --> 00:14:23.279 Have you ever found yourself in hot water simply because of something you said? 00:14:24.240 --> 00:14:30.879 Have you ever found yourself in a in a serious situation because you did not exercise control over what came out? 00:14:31.279 --> 00:14:33.519 One of my favorite stories in history has to do with that. 00:14:33.600 --> 00:14:40.320 There was there was this young lawyer about my age, he was 33, and he had a he had a really good way with words. 00:14:40.480 --> 00:14:42.159 In fact, he was known for being really funny. 00:14:42.320 --> 00:14:52.480 He had a quick wit, and he would use his his quick wit, he would use his way with words and humor to pretty much destroy anyone who opposed him. 00:14:52.720 --> 00:14:54.720 And as he got older, he started to run for office. 00:14:54.799 --> 00:15:00.639 In his early 30s, he was getting involved with politics, and he had this strategy he would use against his political opponents. 00:15:00.720 --> 00:15:01.519 It's pretty brilliant. 00:15:01.679 --> 00:15:05.519 He would write these scathing letters, insulting them, humiliating them. 00:15:05.679 --> 00:15:17.919 They were funny, they were clever, they'd make fun of their appearance, their intelligence, you name it, and he would leave these letters who were written anonymously, he'd leave them in public places so people would find them and then publish them in the newspaper. 00:15:18.159 --> 00:15:20.080 And his opponents were humiliated. 00:15:20.159 --> 00:15:21.759 I mean, his opponents were, they were outraged. 00:15:21.840 --> 00:15:25.679 But eventually one of his political opponents found out who wrote the letter. 00:15:25.759 --> 00:15:32.639 And this is at a time in history when if you were really upset with someone, you could challenge them to a duel, and it was legal. 00:15:33.120 --> 00:15:42.879 You both got pistols and you shot at each other, and the one who lived is the one who won, and that was completely okay in the eyes of the law. 00:15:43.120 --> 00:15:47.440 And so this man challenged the young lawyer to a duel, but here was the problem. 00:15:47.600 --> 00:15:52.399 The lawyer was really good with words, but not so experienced with a gun. 00:15:52.799 --> 00:16:06.879 But the man that challenged him was, and it was it was understood, it was a certain fact, that this young guy, this young guy who just had to open his mouth, who just had to be clever and funny at the expense of another person, he knew he was gonna die. 00:16:07.279 --> 00:16:14.960 And the actual accounts of this say that his normal humor, his normal wit was kind of gone, and he was just solemn. 00:16:15.440 --> 00:16:18.159 He knew his life was just about done. 00:16:18.240 --> 00:16:26.159 And thankfully, a mutual friend of the two came in at the last minute and and resolved it without violence, and the man went on to live. 00:16:26.799 --> 00:16:28.559 In 1861, he was elected president. 00:16:28.639 --> 00:16:30.159 His name was Abraham Lincoln. 00:16:30.960 --> 00:16:34.240 He's known as one of the greatest leaders in history. 00:16:34.720 --> 00:16:36.960 One of the greatest leaders of men that has ever lived. 00:16:37.120 --> 00:16:46.080 And how crazy is it that we almost lost a man like Lincoln because he could not control his words, because he could not keep his words to himself. 00:16:47.039 --> 00:16:52.399 What's really amazing about that story is that when Lincoln was assassinated, they went through his desk and they cleared it all out. 00:16:52.559 --> 00:17:01.039 And they found in this locked drawer in his desk dozens and dozens of letters that he wrote that were very much like the ones he wrote when he was younger. 00:17:01.279 --> 00:17:08.240 They were letters he wrote to generals he was upset with, letters he wrote to opponents that he had, and these letters were they were like those letters of old. 00:17:08.319 --> 00:17:10.400 They were scathing, they were humiliating. 00:17:10.640 --> 00:17:13.119 He had not lost his way with words. 00:17:13.839 --> 00:17:16.480 But see, the difference is he never mailed those. 00:17:17.359 --> 00:17:20.079 He wrote those and he kept them to himself. 00:17:20.240 --> 00:17:25.519 The young Lincoln said things and then thought to himself, ooh, I take it back. 00:17:27.440 --> 00:17:36.000 The older Lincoln, the wiser Lincoln learned that he would never have to say, I take it back, if he didn't send it in the first place. 00:17:37.359 --> 00:17:39.359 He learned from Proverbs. 00:17:40.480 --> 00:17:45.680 Proverbs chapter 29, verse 11 says, Fools vent their anger, but the wise quietly hold it back. 00:17:45.839 --> 00:17:47.599 I love the way the message version says it. 00:17:47.680 --> 00:17:51.920 A fool lets it all hang out, but a sage quietly mulls it over. 00:17:55.599 --> 00:17:57.279 How much different would our lives be? 00:17:57.440 --> 00:18:06.799 How much more successful, how much more peaceful would our lives be if we were people who exercised extreme control over our words? 00:18:07.359 --> 00:18:09.279 Because words are not trivial. 00:18:09.599 --> 00:18:10.880 What you say has impact. 00:18:11.039 --> 00:18:16.079 In fact, the ancient Hebrew people they had a very specific idea of how words worked, and we might call it superstition. 00:18:16.240 --> 00:18:20.079 They believed that once a word left someone's mouth, that word had a life of its own. 00:18:20.240 --> 00:18:23.599 That word would live on and it could affect people for ages to come. 00:18:23.759 --> 00:18:27.599 That's why they believed so powerfully in blessings and curses. 00:18:27.839 --> 00:18:30.640 They kind of saw words like arrows that come from a bow. 00:18:30.799 --> 00:18:36.319 Once it's released, that arrow, it's gonna move, it's gonna have an impact, it's going to affect someone. 00:18:36.400 --> 00:18:39.759 You cannot shoot an arrow and then say, I take it back. 00:18:40.720 --> 00:18:42.079 I didn't mean it. 00:18:43.519 --> 00:18:44.720 I was just kidding. 00:18:45.680 --> 00:18:46.960 Doesn't work like that. 00:18:48.240 --> 00:18:49.519 See, words are no different. 00:18:49.759 --> 00:19:02.960 We have this incredible opportunity to become people who master what we say, to be people who recognize the power that our words have. 00:19:03.039 --> 00:19:04.400 Because yes, our words are dangerous. 00:19:04.480 --> 00:19:09.440 Yes, our words can cut down and destroy, but our words can also build up, our words can inspire. 00:19:10.160 --> 00:19:12.960 What do you want to be remembered for saying? 00:19:13.200 --> 00:19:14.880 What do you want your legacy to be? 00:19:14.960 --> 00:19:19.839 What quotes do you want credited to you when your life is done? 00:19:20.640 --> 00:19:25.039 I guarantee you this there is someone, at least one person in your life. 00:19:26.480 --> 00:19:33.440 Someone that loves you so much, someone that holds you in such regard, someone that's so close to you that your opinion matters so much to them. 00:19:33.599 --> 00:19:38.960 You have the ability to change their life with the right words. 00:19:40.160 --> 00:19:42.319 And that's how Jesus lived his life. 00:19:42.960 --> 00:19:45.279 Jesus never had to say, I take it back. 00:19:46.000 --> 00:19:48.720 Jesus never said, Oh, that came out wrong. 00:19:49.039 --> 00:19:55.440 If Jesus had a Twitter account, he would have never deleted a tweet, he would have never blamed a tweet on some intern or anything like that. 00:19:55.759 --> 00:20:01.119 Jesus meant what he said, and he said what he meant. 00:20:02.319 --> 00:20:16.240 Jesus was the living embodiment of Ephesians chapter 4, verse 29, which says, Don't use foul or abusive language, let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. 00:20:16.400 --> 00:20:19.920 How can your words inspire someone? 00:20:20.400 --> 00:20:26.160 What would happen if the people who claimed to be followers of Jesus spoke like Jesus? 00:20:27.119 --> 00:20:31.519 I mean, Jesus, when he spoke to everyday people, he lifted them up. 00:20:31.599 --> 00:20:37.759 There was the time that Peter, this fisherman who started following Jesus, recognized who Jesus was. 00:20:38.000 --> 00:20:43.119 And Jesus says to him, Peter, you are the rock that I'm going to build my church on. 00:20:43.920 --> 00:20:47.599 See, Peter was a fisherman, working class. 00:20:48.720 --> 00:20:54.319 In that day and age, the brightest and the best young men would be chosen by rabbis to become disciples. 00:20:54.880 --> 00:20:57.200 And Peter had been one of the ones passed over. 00:20:57.920 --> 00:20:59.440 But Jesus picked him. 00:20:59.680 --> 00:21:03.920 And then Jesus spoke into his life and said, Peter, you are strong. 00:21:04.160 --> 00:21:05.519 You are mighty. 00:21:05.839 --> 00:21:08.400 You're so strong, I'm going to build my church on you. 00:21:08.480 --> 00:21:14.240 You're going to be the one that leads this when I'm not physically present on this earth anymore. 00:21:14.400 --> 00:21:16.000 What did that do to Peter? 00:21:17.039 --> 00:21:21.039 How did that change the way Peter saw himself? 00:21:22.640 --> 00:21:24.960 There was a young woman who was brought to Jesus. 00:21:25.279 --> 00:21:26.559 She was caught in sin. 00:21:26.640 --> 00:21:27.759 She was caught in adultery. 00:21:27.839 --> 00:21:30.880 And in that time, you could be stoned to death. 00:21:31.359 --> 00:21:33.279 Stoned to death for committing adultery. 00:21:33.359 --> 00:21:34.240 And she was caught in it. 00:21:34.400 --> 00:21:40.640 The Pharisees, the religious leaders brought her to Jesus and they said, Look, the law says we can stone her. 00:21:40.799 --> 00:21:41.920 What do you say? 00:21:42.960 --> 00:21:47.440 Jesus asked which of them had never sinned before, and they got the picture, they left. 00:21:47.519 --> 00:21:49.839 And then he walks up to this woman and he asks her this question. 00:21:49.920 --> 00:21:52.480 He says, Where are your accusers? 00:21:53.839 --> 00:21:55.200 She says, They're gone. 00:21:56.799 --> 00:21:58.960 Jesus said, I do not condemn you. 00:22:00.319 --> 00:22:05.759 Now, this is a woman who had been condemned by everyone, everyone who knew her. 00:22:06.640 --> 00:22:16.319 She had heard countless people tell her who she was in their eyes, tell her that she was a sinner, tell her that she was she was trash. 00:22:16.799 --> 00:22:21.839 And Jesus, the Son of God, walks up to her and says, I do not condemn you. 00:22:21.920 --> 00:22:28.400 I hope if you're here this morning and you you struggle with guilt and shame, I hope that you've heard Jesus speak those words to you. 00:22:28.880 --> 00:22:30.480 And if you haven't, you need to hear it. 00:22:30.640 --> 00:22:32.720 He does not condemn you. 00:22:34.240 --> 00:22:37.680 He tells her, I don't condemn you, I accept you. 00:22:39.039 --> 00:22:40.400 See, that woman's life changed. 00:22:40.799 --> 00:22:44.880 She went from being a prostitute to being one of his most passionate followers. 00:22:45.039 --> 00:22:51.680 In fact, she's the one, most scholars believe, the Mary that Jesus first showed himself to when he had risen. 00:22:52.880 --> 00:22:59.359 The person entrusted, the very first person entrusted with the message, he is risen. 00:23:00.799 --> 00:23:02.240 She was the first one. 00:23:04.079 --> 00:23:11.279 But if Jesus hadn't spoken into her life, if he hadn't recognized that his words could change her destiny, that would have never happened. 00:23:11.440 --> 00:23:16.000 Your words are that powerful because you are made in the image of God. 00:23:17.759 --> 00:23:20.000 What do you want to be remembered for saying? 00:23:20.160 --> 00:23:25.440 Whatever that is, start saying it today and repeat it constantly. 00:23:27.599 --> 00:23:30.160 I have a really close relationship with my kids. 00:23:30.319 --> 00:23:31.440 I love being a dad. 00:23:31.599 --> 00:23:31.920 I love it. 00:23:32.079 --> 00:23:33.279 I'm really immature as a father. 00:23:33.359 --> 00:23:34.480 I'm just going to admit that. 00:23:34.640 --> 00:23:36.960 Like I Star Wars is about to come out. 00:23:37.039 --> 00:23:38.720 If if anyone has anyone recognized that? 00:23:38.880 --> 00:23:39.200 Yeah. 00:23:39.359 --> 00:23:41.440 Yeah, we can clap for some Star Wars. 00:23:41.599 --> 00:23:42.799 I'm with you. 00:23:43.119 --> 00:23:51.359 And I've told my wife, like, oh man, you know, it's going to be impossible to resist the marketing of Star Wars for a kid that's his age over the next few years. 00:23:51.440 --> 00:23:53.680 So we better just go all in, I guess. 00:23:55.039 --> 00:23:55.839 But don't worry. 00:23:56.160 --> 00:23:59.920 I mean, I've I've spotted some toys, and I'll I'll be happy to have lightsaber fights with them. 00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:03.440 And the video games, I got that covered, and you know, I already booked tickets to the movie and everything. 00:24:03.519 --> 00:24:03.839 We're good. 00:24:03.920 --> 00:24:05.200 I mean, because I'm a good dad. 00:24:07.680 --> 00:24:12.079 But with Liam, one of the things that I I have I've really worked on. 00:24:12.319 --> 00:24:23.680 And this isn't me saying, oh, do do what I do, because I'm actually the last person you would probably want to follow when it comes to what I say and what I don't say, because I just tend to say everything that I think of. 00:24:23.920 --> 00:24:27.759 But with him, more than anyone else, I have been really purposeful. 00:24:28.079 --> 00:24:32.480 I've really wanted to recognize that my words as his father will shape him. 00:24:32.559 --> 00:24:38.319 I know some of us had words as children spoken over us that have haunted us, that we have tried to forget. 00:24:38.480 --> 00:24:41.759 I want my son to hold on to the words that I say to him. 00:24:42.400 --> 00:24:46.559 And so there's two things that I can say to Liam any day, and he'll just repeat it. 00:24:46.640 --> 00:24:47.279 Like it's automatic. 00:24:47.359 --> 00:24:49.519 I'll say, Liam, why does daddy love you? 00:24:49.680 --> 00:24:51.440 And he'll say, Because you do. 00:24:51.839 --> 00:24:55.839 Because I tell him every day, I love you because I love you. 00:24:56.160 --> 00:24:57.599 That's the way God loves us. 00:24:57.920 --> 00:24:59.279 You ever ask God, why do you love me? 00:24:59.359 --> 00:25:01.920 He'll say, Because I love you, and it's my choice, and you can't change it. 00:25:02.160 --> 00:25:04.799 I tell Liam, I love you because I love you. 00:25:05.519 --> 00:25:07.759 I'll also ask Liam, what's my job? 00:25:08.000 --> 00:25:09.119 And Liam will repeat it. 00:25:09.200 --> 00:25:12.079 He'll finish my sentence, to teach me to be a good man. 00:25:12.400 --> 00:25:19.039 And that actually comes in handy a lot whenever I'm needing to discipline Liam because he's five and he's sometimes not a good boy, but that's okay. 00:25:19.119 --> 00:25:20.559 He's still a boy, he's not a man yet. 00:25:20.640 --> 00:25:21.759 We're still working on that. 00:25:21.920 --> 00:25:25.359 And I'll just stop and say, Liam, what is my job? 00:25:25.599 --> 00:25:28.559 And they'll kind of look down and say, Teach me to be a good man. 00:25:28.720 --> 00:25:32.000 I'm like, okay, would a good man do this? 00:25:32.319 --> 00:25:32.640 No. 00:25:34.160 --> 00:25:37.440 See, I want Liam to repeat those things to his kids. 00:25:37.519 --> 00:25:43.039 I envision Liam one day having a son and looking at his son and saying, Why does daddy love you? 00:25:43.200 --> 00:25:45.759 And I envision his son saying, Because you do. 00:25:45.920 --> 00:25:50.960 And I picture Liam telling his son one day, What's my job? 00:25:51.039 --> 00:25:56.799 And Liam's son saying, to teach me to be a good man, because see, he knows that I believe he will be one. 00:25:58.079 --> 00:26:00.319 And then that goes down to another generation. 00:26:00.480 --> 00:26:03.759 Do you understand this morning that's how powerful your words are? 00:26:04.079 --> 00:26:12.799 That they will outlive you, that what you speak will live on in the hearts of the people that God brings you into contact with. 00:26:12.960 --> 00:26:14.720 We are the people who follow Jesus. 00:26:14.880 --> 00:26:17.440 Let's be people who talk like Jesus. 00:26:18.240 --> 00:26:21.599 Let's be people that recognize that our words are powerful. 00:26:21.759 --> 00:26:25.359 This culture that tells us that our words don't matter, that words are trivial, just forget about them. 00:26:25.440 --> 00:26:26.640 It's wrong. 00:26:27.440 --> 00:26:29.359 Our words matter as much as anything. 00:26:29.519 --> 00:26:33.599