Why Repentance and Forgiveness Go Together | Paul Malott

We all fall short. Even when we know God’s way is best, the old nature can creep in and lead us down paths we never intended to take. In this message, Pastor Paul talks honestly about sin, repentance, and the hope we have when we return to God.

 As we explore 1 John and the teachings of Jesus, we see that repentance and forgiveness are meant to go hand in hand. Repentance invites us to turn back to God, and forgiveness frees us to move forward. This message is an invitation to experience the freedom that comes when we walk in humility, grace, and obedience.

🙌 Connect with Us:

• New? - hopecity.ca/new
• Stay Connected - hopecity.ca/weekly
• Following Jesus - hopecity.ca/life
• Giving - hopecity.ca/give
• Follow us on Instagram: @HopeCityYEG
• Visit our Website: hopecity.ca
• Follow us on TikTok: @HopeCityYEG
• Find other ways to listen to the podcast: hopecity.ca/podcast

🙏 Need Prayer?
Please leave a comment or reach out to us directly—we’re here for you!

Transcript

0:16

- Hey, this is Phil Kal, lead pastor at Hope City Church. Thanks for tuning into our podcast. My prayer is that this helps and encourages you, gives you some practical ways to live out your faith and ultimately fills you with hope. Enjoy the message.- A few weeks back, I found a box with some old thumb drives in it. And so I thought I'd take the afternoon and kind of go through them. Maybe, maybe I could find some hidden gems, you know, like those videos of the kids when they're younger and such. And of course there were a ton of those in, in the box or in on the thumb drives. And, uh, and some of those videos I've seen before. In fact, they circulate through our family group chat over and over and over again'cause they're that good. Then there are others that, uh, well, I didn't even realize I had. So that was kind of fun to experience. And now they're being sent into the group chat. But without fail, most of those videos of the kids were probably at a moment when as a parent we found our kids playing nicely together. And so you pull out the phone and you want to record just even a brief moment of them playing nicely because you know what's about to happen at one point in the video. And without fail, one of the children decides to take the initiative to do something they know that is going to bug their sibling. And without fail, there's some level of, within a nanosecond, going from nicely playing together to an all out fist fight between the two or somebody chasing somebody for a little bit of a pound of flesh. We've experienced that as parents, I'm sure, multiple times and without fail. Uh, now all depending on who the videographer will was, would determine whether it was stopped right at that moment or if the, the video kept going so that we could see a little bit of the punishment inflicted. Uh, but without fail, we take those moments as parents and we try and teach our children the art of repentance and forgiveness, but more often than not, it's not so much repentance and forgiveness as much as it's retribution and fault finding. And so we, we have to learn that over the years. What does repentance, what does forgiveness really mean? Well, welcome to our last Sunday of our series that we've called The Main Thing in. Over the six weeks that we've been journeying together, we've been looking at what Jesus says needs to be the number one goal in our life, to love the Lord your God, with all your heart, soul, and strength. And he calls this the first and greatest commandment. And so we've been unpacking different priorities that the main thing should have in our life. And we've said along the way, if we don't choose our priorities, our pressures will. And two priorities that we need to be focusing on are that of repentance and forgiveness. A few weeks back, pastor Phil mentioned that if we want to top or follow this top command, then we need to be putting on the armor of God because with the armor of God, we're gonna be able to battle through and defeat the enemies in our life. Now, pastor Ken said two weeks ago though, that sometimes the enemy in our life is actually ourself. It's our old nature battling against our new nature, and we need the Holy Spirit's strength to help us through the journey. And then last week, pastor Phil highlighted the fact that we need the scriptures in our life to be able to differentiate between the things that are of the old nature and the things that are of God's design for our life. And all of these things are true, but what happens when our old nature wins? What happens when we read through the scriptures, seeing how God defines the fullness of life, even believing in theory. But that old nature kind of creeps in. And even though we may be battling for a while through some of these things or, or maybe we're even caught off guard, sometimes that old nature gets us and we fall into saying or doing something that's completely contrary to the way that Christ would have us to live Hope City. There is not one of us in this room, not one of us who's watching online that is without sin. We all struggle with sin. You can define sin as this a thought feeling, speech or action that transgresses something forbidden or ignores something required by God's law or character. In other words, it's both doing something that shouldn't be done and not doing something that should be done. Yes, the standard that God sets for us is complete holiness being completely set apart for God to live in every way as he designed for us to live. And theoretically, most would say we know that's true. His way is the best way to live life to the fullest, but the temptations of life are real. So whether that be the pressure for more money or the thing more things or experiences or pleasure or fame or security, it can get us and we end up doing something or saying things that are contrary to the way of Christ or we avoid doing the very thing God wants us to do. Now, some of those pressures, some of those temptations, yes, they get easier over time as we mature and as we grow in who we are in Christ. That is true. But please don't become naive to think that you are no longer susceptible to falling into sin. Each and every one of us, you need to listen to this. We are all one poor decision away from humiliation. And if that happens, lemme give you some hope. There's a small book in the Bible, it's called First John John, the author is attributed to the author John. And John actually wrote the Gospel of John. He also wrote Revelation. And then there are three little letters that he wrote kind of tucked in at the end of the New Testament. And that first letter, first John, chapter one, it says this, starting at verse five, this is the message we have heard from him. And declare to you God is light in him. There is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him, yet walk in the darkness. We lie and we do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another and the blood of Jesus, his son purifies us from all sin. If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves. And the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar. And his word is not in us. My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have an advocate with the Father Jesus Christ, the righteous one. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for hours, but also for the sins of the whole world. I, I love what John's doing here. He is establishing a, a balance. He highlights the standard set for us in scripture that we are to live a sinless life. No excuses. There's that expectation that's set before us. As a follower of Jesus. You cannot, there is no way for you to be able to justify any sin in your life whatsoever. But If you do sin, he says, he's saying like, I don't want you to sin. I am actually expecting that you're gonna stay close to Christ, that you're gonna be putting on his armor, that you're gonna be fighting with the power of the spirit, that you're gonna be pursuing his word. But if you do sin, please know this, we have an advocate who's willing to fight for us, that if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. You see, when we confess, God is faithful. He is, he is faithful, but he's also not, he's not just faithful, he's faithful. And just the reality is there is justice that's going to be served for your sin. It just so happens that when we truly confess, it's Jesus that takes upon himself the sin or the pain and the responsibility for your sin. I don't get it. I don't deserve it. Neither do you. But that's what he is faithful to do. So we better have a biblical perspective on what confession or repentance really is. I think a good place to start is Acts chapter three. In Acts chapter three, we see the apostle Peter, he is arriving at the synagogue and he heals a man just outside the synagogue who had been crippled for a really long time. And then he goes into the synagogue and he finds himself, himself saying this to the crowd, repent then and turn to God so that your sins may be wiped out. That times of refreshing may come from the Lord. Let me unpack that. Repent and turn component. He's, he's saying, re to repent is actually to reject the sin that you've been doing, reject the way that you have been walking and turn completely or run towards what Christ would have for you. It's completely turning away. It, it's, it's not good enough for us to kind of just turn our head, but our heart still longs for the thing that we know we shouldn't be doing. No, we have to turn completely, we have to reject that, and we have to turn and run toward what it is that God has for us. And it's not just rejecting He, he goes on, it's, it's more of a, of a description of, of actually coming to a point where you despise the sin. You know, when my kids would, uh, we'd make our kids say, you know, they, they apologize to one another. You know how it is, right? I'm sorry, . Yeah. Well, okay. What came outta your mouth and was actually in your heart are two different things. That's not repentance. Repentance is fully turning away and rejecting that actually despising the fact that we hurt somebody, whether it be Christ or somebody else. And we make the commitment in a determination that we're not going to do this again. But it even goes further than just rejecting and running despising. It actually moves to a spot where words are not enough. You gotta prove it a little later on in the book of Acts, the apostle Paul at this time, he's quoted as saying in Acts 26 of verse 20, I preached first to those in Damascus, then in Jerusalem and throughout all Judea and also to the Gentiles. In other words, everybody I talk to, this is what I'm telling them, all must repent of their sins and turn. So that's that same language. All must reject and run, almost despise what we've done. And then he goes on to say and prove they have changed by the good things they do. There has to be new behavior in the choices we make moving forward to keep doing the same thing. And going back to that and longing for it. It's actually making a mockery of God and he doesn't stop there. It, it moves even beyond the fact that we reject and run, that we despise and prove. We have to actually get to a spot where we repair the damaged relationships to the best of our ability. Okay, that kind of just got real now, didn't it? You know, for me to, to go to God, uh, I find it easier to go to God and ask for him to forgive me and, and be determined that, you know what, I'm not gonna do this again. I'm gonna, I'm gonna move from this. But, but for me to go to my spouse or my kids or my parents, or a friend, coworker, a neighbor, a complete stranger, and to ask them to forgive me, that just seems a lot harder because they're, they're probably gonna come with some level of retribution toward me. Like, I get it. God's perfect. He's gonna, he's gonna respond perfectly. Not so much those around me. That may be true, but it's the right thing to do anyways. You know, for us to cover up our sins actually is creating more sin in and of itself. You know, when I was younger, I, uh, would often go over and visit with my grandparents and, uh, and at it without fail, at some point along the way, my grandma would quote for me from numbers 32. And, uh, and this is it, it hounds me even still to this day. Here's what grandma would say. Hey, Paul, be sure your sins will find you out thanks grandma. Seriously, Jesus actually kind of says something similar in Luke chapter eight. He goes, he goes on to say it this way for there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed and nothing concealed that will not be made known or brought out into the open. You know, it's, it's not easy or pretty for us to take ownership of our actions and to ask for forgiveness and even take that step to repair any damage that may have been caused. But let me just say, it is so much easier to take a posture of humility and take the initiative than having our sins find us out. Now, I I, let me caution you, I, there may be some help that you need to, to take and have when you're trying to repair a relationship. So don't just, you know, go on your own, especially all depending on how severe the situation is, you might need some counsel on how to do that most appropriately. And so whether it be a close friend, a trusted friend, or a, a pastor or somebody, uh, that can help, you know, navigate that through with you, it might be helpful to, to seek some help on that one. But these aspects of repentance are what we all need to be working on regularly. So let's, let's highlight what we did. We, we reject what is not of God to run to what is we despise the sin we chose, and we wanna prove our remorse by repairing the damage to the best of our ability. This is our part to play When we've sinned against God and others, how the one we offended responds well, that's up to them and it's kind of out of our hands. If they choose to forgive you, that's awesome. And it's actually the biblical response that they need to take more on that in a moment. But if they don't, we can't demand it. Just remember, you are the one who said what you said, you are the one who did what you did. You can't take that back. And so you're gonna have to learn to live with the temporal consequences of your actions. But what their response can't dictate is how you live moving forward. You've got to align yourself with God's standard. There should always be remorse for the pain inflicted on Christ or on others, but there also needs to be the peace that comes from Christ knowing that he has forgiven us. And he will not eternally hold this against you. So a truly repentant heart can walk in freedom, a changed person. Now that's repentance. That's the first thing, the priority that we're looking at today. But what goes hand in hand with that is forgiveness. Jesus said that his first commandment was to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and strength and, and mind. And, but then he continues on and he says, if you do this one, there's a natural byproduct of that. The two go hand in hand. And he says, this is the first commandment, but, but the second is like it. You're gonna love your neighbor as yourself. So if we want to love ourself enough to have forgiveness given to us, then we must also want forgiveness for everyone else as well. Now, I mentioned earlier that sin is not just something we do that we know we shouldn't do. It's actually also not doing something that we know we should. And I'm human just like you. And when someone, somebody offends me, I'm not overly jazzed or excited about forgiving the offender, but that's what we're supposed to be doing. Jesus blatantly says in Matthew six, if you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your father will not forgive your sins. See, not forgiving someone who has wronged you is in fact a sin. And it actually prevents God from forgiving you of your sins. In Matthew 18 verse 21, Peter asks, Jesus, how many times then should we be forgiving people like, you know, one time or, or maybe, maybe even go as far as to say seven times we forgive somebody. And Jesus says, Uhuh, how about this? 70 times seven. In other words, don't stop forgiving, just keep forgiving. You know, when I take, uh, married couples or premar couples through pre-marriage, I, I'll often notice how they find that they're spending a lot more time and energy on like one day the wedding than they are on the, uh, till death do us part part. And, uh, if you're engaged here or maybe you're just newly married and and you haven't done any pre-marriage stuff, can I encourage you to do so? We do have a couple courses that we offer a couple of times a year that would ex be extremely beneficial for you to consider taking. Uh, because here's the reality. When you're merging two lives together with all the baggage of your upbringing, uh, that becomes difficult. And one of the key things in a married relationship that you need to be working on and perfecting is the art of forgiveness. Like, it's, it's very present there, but I think, I think forgiveness needs to extend beyond that. And so let me kind of walk you through some steps that I often walk them through six steps that, uh, that I think are helpful when, uh, when granting forgiveness. First name the hurt. You know, it's okay to allow yourself to feel disrespected when someone does something against you. It hurts, it's wrong. It's okay to recognize that that was not okay. Name the hurt. Set clear boundaries. The second thing, this is about being clear. When the offender, with the offender, uh, that you're recognizing what they did was inappropriate and it will not be tolerated to continue. Obviously your expectations must not become themselves offensive, and it needs to be established through some biblical standards, but there needs to be healthy boundaries there, for sure. Third thing, release revenge. Give up your right to get even. Let that one sink in for a sec. Fourth thing, drop resentment. Let go of blame and negativity toward your offender. Fifth thing, forgiveness spoken is forgiveness strengthened. In other words, you need to be communicating your act of forgiveness. And then the sixth thing, pursue reconciliation. When safe, as we looked at earlier, part of repentance is changing your ways. And when someone's unwilling to take responsibility for their actions and change their ways, it's really hard to reconcile. You may be willing to forgive, but genuine repentance isn't there, which makes reconciliation almost impossible. So out of all these six steps, I I understand steps three to six are extremely hard and really can only be done through prayer. I learned early in, uh, ministry that, that it's actually not praying so much for yourself as praying for the one who offended you. You know, when somebody offends me, I, I find myself praying a simple prayer, but very difficult prayer. It goes along the lines of this Father, bless them, help me to see them as you see them. Help me to love them as you love them. You know how freeing a simple prayer like that is when your heart actually gets it. Listen, God wants what's best for you. You were created in his image. He loves you and came to this earth to die for you, taking upon himself all the sins that you've committed against him. And he wants you to live a life that's free from the bondage that we find ourself in. But let's also realize he did the same thing for the one who offended you and he wants what's best for them as well. You might not like that, but it's true. And we need to have a heart that wants God's best for others, including the ones who's offended you. Now listen, I can't even begin to imagine the stories that may be represented here in this room or those watching online, but God sees the pain caused by the words that have been spoken against you. He knows the actions that others have committed to hurt you. And his heart breaks for those who are hurting. He didn't cause it. That's humanity's fall human nature. But Christ also knows the prison that we put ourself in when we choose not to forgive and walk in that forgiveness church, he longs for you to experience the freedom he has for you. But it comes when you begin to let go. Some of you here today, you might, you might need to find yourself in that moment of repentance. For some of you, it might that you need to forgive someone in your life. Some of you might need to have both. Now this may be quick, but it might be a journey that you need to start today. So in this moment, I wanna invite you to close your eyes and open your heart to the Holy Spirit for a moment. Let's, let's start with repentance. Is there something in your life that God wants to reveal to you right now and he's inviting you to repent of it? What are those areas of your life that you need to reject that are not of God that you need to turn from and run towards? What is of him? What are those sins that you need to learn to despise, to prove moving forward that you have walked away from that the relationships that you need to repair? Just keep your eyes closed for a minute longer. And is there anyone in, in your life that, uh, maybe that God's saying, I need you to forgive this person. Just begin by praying a simple prayer and you can add their name in your mind as you think through, through this simple prayer that says, father Bless, help me to see them as you see them. Help me to love them as you love them. It may take some time, whether it be on the repentance side, whether it be on the forgiveness side, it may take time to get there, but be determined that you're gonna make it happen through the work of the Spirit in your life. You're gonna partner together and you're gonna get over this. Allow the Holy Spirit to change your hard heart to a broken heart that aches the way his aches. So heavenly Father, I pray today for each of those who are here in this room for those who are watching online. And maybe this is the first time that they're coming to you in a moment of repentance. Maybe this is a first time that they're actually confronting this unforgiveness. Maybe it's something that has been an ongoing battle regardless of where we are in the journey. God, I pray that today would be just another confirmation that this is a step forward and walking in the main thing that you are asking us to do, to love you with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength, to love our neighbor as ourself. And so Jesus, I ask that we would not leave without determining in our heart with you that we're gonna work on these issues in our life. I pray that you would break them from these strongholds. I pray that they would walk in freedom and Lord, that they would give you all the glory in it all. So we ask this in the powerful name of Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. Maybe you're here today and uh, and you are just kind of coming to grips with the fact that you need Jesus as, uh, your Lord and Savior and, but you're not sure where to go from here. Well, I would encourage you to take your phone and just tap the disc on the seat back in front of you there. You'll find a, a digital booklet that we have that kind of highlights some next steps that you can take, uh, as a follower of Jesus Christ. And so we'd encourage you to do that, or you can go to hope city.ca/life and grab that booklet there as well. You can also find, have an opportunity there to be able to connect with a pastor and, and chat more about some next steps for you. If, uh, if you are here and you want prayer for anything, then can I encourage you? We'll have a team of people at the front left of the platform following the service. They'll be here to pray with you. And, uh, so now let me conclude by saying, may you go from here today being focused on the main thing to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and prove that as you walk by loving your neighbor as yourself. God bless you. Thank you for being here.