Two Prayers, One Merciful God

What if the prayer God always answers is the simplest one: “Be merciful to me”? We take a fresh look at Luke 18’s Pharisee and tax collector and discover a bigger, braver reading of mercy—one that refuses the lie of spiritual scorekeeping and invites us to live free from the need to earn love.

We start by slowing down. As the season turns toward longer nights, we trade the tyranny of the clock for the attentiveness of the Spirit. That shift reframes everything: fasting and tithing become practices of humility, not proof of superiority; prayer becomes communion, not performance. From there, we press into the scandal of grace. The Pharisee’s devotion is real. The tax collector’s harm is real. And yet mercy meets both, not because they’ve balanced the ledger, but because love moves first. It’s the same shock in the story of the prodigal and the older brother—offensive generosity that pulls us into a party we didn’t plan.

Forgiveness, though, is not denial. We name harm clearly, leave unsafe spaces, and get help when trauma sticks. A simple practice—letting some memories pass like white lines on the road—teaches us to stop feeding what doesn’t need to define us. When deeper wounds surface, therapy and the Holy Spirit work well together. Throughout, we return to surrender: choosing release over resentment, mercy over contempt, presence over hurry. And we ground it in action—stopping for the small needs in front of us, practicing interruptible love, and training our hearts to be ready to forgive.

If this conversation stirred something in you, share it with a friend, subscribe for more, and leave a review so others can find it. Your words help us spread mercy’s good news.

Chapters

• 0:00 Watching For What Lasts
• 2:40 Practicing Life In The Spirit
• 3:24 Luke 18 Sets The Stage
• 6:40 Parables That Disrupt Certainty
• 8:45 Self-Righteousness And Contempt
• 12:20 Mercy As The Hidden Keyword
• 15:20 Pharisee And Tax Collector Prayers
• 19:10 Fasting, Tithing, And The Weightier Matters
• 23:10 Justified By Mercy, Not Performance
• 26:10 The Prodigal And The Older Brother
• 29:05 Offense At Unfair Grace
• 33:00 Ready To Forgive Without Delay
• 37:20 White Lines And Letting Go

Transcript

SPEAKER_01: 0:00

Welcome to the First Love Church podcast. This is a collection of Sunday teachings inspired by the Revised Common Lectionary and recorded weekly in Ocalo, Florida. This is the 20th Sunday of Pentecost. And what does that mean? That means, beloved, four weeks until Advent. And so we don't measure the year by when Advent comes, but some of us do, me in particular, in this idea of what are we looking for? How do we learn to watch for the things that are eternal? How do we learn to pay attention to the darkness, to embrace it? This morning we haven't set our clocks yet. That's coming. But you noticed this morning when you got up, your alarm clock went off, and it was dark outside. And these things ought not be beloved. We should get up when the sun gets up. This is my opinion. But you just recognize that I was thinking about this before 200 years ago, people didn't normal, like regular people, everyday people, didn't have time pieces. That was for the wealthy. And most people measured their days based on the shadows. They didn't constantly look at their watch, they didn't constantly have a calendar that said this is it. They practiced being and being aware of when the time was coming. In fact, the scripture tells us that we also, as people who are led by the Spirit, especially during Pentecost, that we pay attention to the shadows, that we pay attention to the things that are coming. And this is the work of Pentecost in us. The things that we'll talk about today, they are big things because they're things that Jesus talked about, like loving your neighbor, like loving your enemies. And these things require the work of the Holy Spirit in us. So as the church, we practice what does it mean for us to live as people so fully connected to the love of God that we stay in step with the Holy Spirit? In fact, one of the New Testament writers says this in Him or in God, in love, we live and move and have our being. Is it possible to stay so connected to love that you stay in the presence of God all the time? The answer is yes, beloved, but it will take practice. And so the good news is we practice together. The good news is that there is hope for us and that things can change because love is eternal, beloved, and love is all powerful.

SPEAKER_00: 2:28

You know, we uh remind you of uh the 20th week of Pentecost, uh, really to remind you in this season and really hopefully all of our lives, that we would uh give heed to the Holy Spirit. Pay attention, learn how to follow the voice of Spirit, amen. This is how we uh can uh exist and and uh and thrive and succeed in this life is is learning to surrender. So uh hopefully at church, when we week after week remind you in this season that maybe we we learn to train ourselves to to listen and and be in tune with spirit, amen.

SPEAKER_01: 3:08

One of the ways that really helps us a practice is just slowing down, is eliminating hurry from our lives, is just taking a moment, a deep breath, and asking God, how do you see this going? What would you have me do? How should I look at this? And we come here to this text today in Luke chapter 18, and in the past couple weeks, we've been hearing a very similar thread. And I want to remind you that in Luke's gospel, we're gonna start with this particular verse, verse 9. And this is Luke who is presenting himself as a narrator. I remind you that this is long after Jesus has gone, he has resurrected and ascended, and people have been practicing together. And what does it look like for us to be the people who know that Jesus and the path that Jesus showed us is the ascended way? And Luke is writing this down for us, and so in this particular parable, he's telling us look at it this way. He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous. Thank you. Miss Carroll said the right. That's what Luke wanted us to say. That's exactly what the writer hoped that we would say. Trusted in themselves that they were righteous and treated others with contempt. Now I just want to tell you this. I feel like it's a bit of a Star Wars thing, but it's a trap, beloved. It's a trap. The next verse is before you start going, I know which one is the right one. Don't do it, don't do it, it's a trap, it's a trap. And that's the beauty of a parable. A parable is supposed to make you think. A parable is supposed to stop you and go, really? You should tilt your head a little bit to the side and go, I didn't think it was like that. Jesus kept doing this to us and said, There's a great unlearning that you need to do. You have heard it say, but I say unto you, you have heard it said, but this is another way. You've heard it said, love your friends and hate your enemies, and Jesus said, but I'm saying, do you love your enemies? And so a parable is for us a um an invitation to rethink something, to turn it on its head, to look at something differently. And that's again, a parable should upset us. The parable of the Good Samaritan should really like make our necks bristle. The parable of the workers who all get the same wage, even though some of them have been working since the morning. I mean, that should turn things on edge for you. And this is the invitation that Jesus said when he said, I'm gonna show you a kingdom that is here that is so beautiful. But you're gonna have to practice seeing it.

SPEAKER_00: 5:48

You know, when you look at this verse, uh those those righteous people that trusted in their own righteousness, uh, you're like, oh, who are those bad people? Uh you know, they're they're always somebody else. Uh how do you how do you open up the consideration that maybe you you do that in some areas? Because it's great to come to church and hear the message that somebody else needs to hear. But since we're here, it might be a good idea for us to get some help ourselves, amen? Uh and and I think um I think kind of the answers right there in uh uh how you treat other people. Uh when you have this confidence of your own righteousness, then you treat others with contempt. Look at those other people who aren't as good as me. Look at those other people. What's wrong with them, the way they vote? What's wrong with them, the way they act uh you know, towards uh other people, their sexual relationships, and we just judge with all this self-righteousness. And uh, and ooh, that kind of starts hitting home, doesn't it? I wonder, uh, you know, and I I think one thing I've experienced um, and it's the weirdest thing, giving food to homeless people every time, almost every time I've ever done it, they say, Hey, if you have any more food, I know some other people.

unknown: 7:04

Wow.

SPEAKER_00: 7:06

It's a phenomenon. Because I would think if you had nothing, you'd be like, Well, give me all of that. But they go, they're so grateful for what was given, and then they immediately go, I know some other homeless people. And they want what mercy has been given to them, they want it for other people instead of, well, I I earned this from you, my homeless self earned this, and so now uh and so don't give it to those other unrighteous homeless people. See, they they see themselves in a way of grateful, and it causes them to spread gratitude. And and I wonder sometimes if we get caught up in our own righteous behavior, and you do some stuff really good, incidentally. Congratulations on that.

SPEAKER_01: 7:50

We thank you. Please continue. But don't rest. There's more, there's more.

SPEAKER_00: 7:54

That's my my achievement, and look what I've done, and nobody else can do it again, and then we start to get self-righteous, don't we? Yeah, we can. And so let's let's uh let's try to maintain that heart of understanding what grace has been given to me, and then I I tend to not pass that judgment on other people because I'm myself am forgiven just like them.

SPEAKER_03: 8:18

Amen.

SPEAKER_00: 8:18

Instead of, well, now I got a different deal because of my, you know, I'm a pastor and I I behave really good.

SPEAKER_01: 8:26

Everyone together, Lord in your mercy, Christ in your mercy. All of us. And I thank you so much for highlighting for us. And a key word that I would ask you to look at is the word mercy. It's not really going to be here a whole lot, but you're gonna see it. And we have to ask ourselves, who is Jesus really telling us this story about? I'm heard this story, I'm sure you have many, many times. And I want to remind you that it's probably not about tax collectors and Pharisees. The story tells us something about God that we're really uncomfortable with. The story tells us something about the nature of love that makes us feel very uneasy. And so I would ask you to open your heart to allow the Holy Spirit to re-enchant this so that you would be able to hear what Jesus is actually asking us to do. And Jesus is provoking this morning. It's kind of one of the things that Jesus did all the time. Jesus provoked the status quo. Jesus, in his radical love and radical hospitality, made people have to consider and think, why do I do this? Why is that what I believe? And this is what the Holy Spirit is inviting us to do. Jesus said, two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. I want to take just a moment and remind you that these people went to the temple. Congratulations for coming this morning, but I want to tell you what happens at the temple, at least in their minds and in theirs. People knew who exactly who they were. To a Pharisee, he went to the temple with a lot of confidence. I know the rules here. I know how to do this. I know that when I walk in, I will be accepted. The tax collector comes and he also knows what will be expected. He will be shunned, he will be looked at poorly, he will be judged. I love about his courage, he still comes. I think his courage is not for the people that are at the temple, but what the temple represented. At least in this story, we understand that temple represented the dwelling place of God. And God no longer dwells in temples, he dwells in us. And so we're mindful that when people are in our presence, it is our responsibility to make sure that we are not judging, that we are not saying, I see and I know exactly who you are. And this is an invitation, again, for us to look at how we see things. Again, this is a trap, beloved. Don't let anyone tell you you need to know who the good guy is in this. We love to do this, at least as humans, I find this. We want to know it all tied up in a bow, who's right and who's wrong, who's the good guy and who's the bad guy? I have to know who to cheer for or who to, you know, passion turn my life against. And Jesus is saying, you don't know. You absolutely do not know. And this is an invitation into mystery, this is an invitation into wrestling, this is an invitation into living differently. But there are two men who go to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. And remind you, the tax collectors were not fair. They weren't like just paid employees. These are people who intentionally took more than what they should have. And they were actually working on behalf of the empire that was oppressing people. And these are people that were cruel and they did terrible things to their own countrymen. And Jesus is reminding us that in the Pharisee and in the tax collector, you don't want to be either of those people, but we do want to see what Jesus is offering. The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus. Or even like this tax collector. It didn't tell us it was a side-eye, but I think it may have been.

SPEAKER_00: 12:24

Oh, it feels like it.

SPEAKER_01: 12:31

I fast twice a week. I give tithes of all that I get. But the tax collector standing afar off would not even lift up his eyes to the heaven, but beat his breast saying, God, be merciful to me, a sinner. So you have these two people standing in the temple praying. The invitation of prayer is communion with God. And this tax collect, now, before you start judging his prayers, beloved, he was doing the things. I mean, and we would like to judge and say his prayers have a lot of I in them. Look at what I am doing. Look at what I am doing. Okay, but there's more. He's actually doing those things. He is actually fasting twice a week, which I want to tell you is far beyond what the Torah insisted on. Nowhere in the law does it say that you have to fast twice a week. So this person is saying what was asked of me, I do more. This person was asked. In fact, this is again very close to what Jesus was talking about when we mentioned this last week, where he said, listen, I give tithes, and Jesus said, Yes, you should do that, but don't neglect the weighty things like mercy, like justice, like social equity. Jesus said, Do those things. And so again, this man says he prays, this man says he gives, this man says he fasts. In Matthew chapter 6, Jesus says, that's what it's gonna look like if you follow me. When you pray, when you give, when you fast. But this man is really saying, hey, and maybe he's being thankful. I do not want to judge this man's prayer, and I recommend you don't judge it either. But maybe he's being thankful for the fact that I thank you, that I am in the position that I can fast. You know, you have to have food in order to choose a fast. Otherwise, it's called famine. A fast means that you have something that you are giving up, and so maybe he's just being grateful for that. But the tax collector is on the side and it says that he can't even lift his head and all he asks for is mercy. Will you be merciful to me? I remind you, this is the prayer God always answers: mercy. And Jesus is showing something to us, not just about praying, not just about being, but he's showing us who God is and what love really looks like.

SPEAKER_00: 14:58

You know, uh Heather and I both have a testimony uh how we came to know Christ, and and but there could not be more opposite. My testimony is uh that I had fiddled around with with drugs and alcohol and and my rock and roll lifestyle and all this, and and then cut coming to my early 20s, I came to the end of myself and found myself in a church and repented and and asked for grace. Uh and God has been uh transforming me uh what seems very slowly uh since then, but consistently, as I will surrender in really the slow in here, uh we we get who that is. Uh but but Heather's testimony, as as would be, you know, her hers to share, but I will just say, you know, born again at four, filled with the Holy Ghost at six, no, none of those wicked things ever touching her lips. She has followed the Lord all the days of her life, and some people like my testimony better because it's got juicy details. But isn't it a greater testimony to have never fallen in that place? But both of us are are at extremes, and this story, two people are at extremes. And so sometimes I I think the church gets the idea it's just all about just being the prodigal son. But actually, the older brother has a better testimony, he never left the father. But the older brother still has to be careful, even in that place, to stay conscious of what's going on. One of my favorite verses in the whole world is, oh, you foolish Galatians who has bewitched you. That you would start off in the spirit and end up in the flesh. That's my favorite verse because I think, wow, I really am, you know, I started way back there, you know, with all that foolishness, and I've come to the Lord, but but what if I get lulled to sleep? What and and that's what this guy he's doing the right thing, but but maybe he's I believe I believe he's lost that touch with mercy, and then we we attribute it always to the one who is who is the the most of sinner. But for us, those are extremes. You understand we're supposed to live in a place of grace where we are aware of our need for it, and we don't have to be in either one of those ditches. You actually can drive on the road. It's much easier to stay out of that place, amen.

SPEAKER_01: 17:23

Amen. I love that you brought to our remembrance the older brother in the story that Jesus tells again of a merciful God, of a father. The story is not the story of sons, it is the story of a father who is willing, who is always ready to bring us home. And the father sees the son, the one who has gone off. I like the there's we love different verses for different reasons, but there's one part where it tells the story of the son who has taken his things and gone off to a far country, he finds himself in famine, he's eating out of the pig's bowl, and it says that he came to himself. And sometimes it takes a long time for us to come back to ourselves. Wait a second, wait a second, I do not belong here eating pig slop. I have a father, I have a home, I have a place where I belong. And it says that he comes back to himself and he says, I will arise and I will go to my father, and I will tell my father. And he starts this prayer that everybody knew. And this is the prayer that the people that were in leadership taught him to pray. Uh, I have sinned against you, and I have sinned against God, and I am no longer worthy to be called your son. And he goes out, he's he's going to just like really tell how sad he is and and how much he's done wrong. And it says that while he was speaking, the father threw his arms around him, doesn't I listen to this, and threw a coat over him. You are mine. And then he comes back in and he has the big party, and the brother's still in the field. Because he's been there the whole time.

SPEAKER_00: 18:51

Doing the right thing.

SPEAKER_01: 18:52

And the father comes out and says, Come into the joy. Oh, come in and celebrate with us. Your your brother that was dead is now alive. And I think for many of us, we need to hear the word of the Lord, come in and celebrate. Oh, the person who forgot who they were is now coming back to themselves. Let's have the music and let's come into joy. The parable that Jesus tells in that story, we don't ever know if he goes in. I would like to know if he went in. I hope he did. I hope I do. I hope I will go into the party. I hope I will go into the joy, into the celebration of that which is lost that is now found. But Jesus is telling us, listen, I want you to know about mercy. It's so much bigger than you could even imagine. We pause here for a moment to thank you for joining us today. If you're finding this episode meaningful, would you take a moment to share it with a friend? This podcast is made possible thanks to the generosity of people just like you. If you would like to support the ongoing work of First Love Church and the continued work of our podcast, visit us online at firstlovechurch.org, reminding you to like, follow, and subscribe.

SPEAKER_00: 20:06

Sometimes for us, God does some real offensive things.

SPEAKER_01: 20:10

If we're paying attention. Yeah, if we're paying attention, it should be really offensive. Yes.

SPEAKER_00: 20:15

And and uh and it's and it's not fair.

SPEAKER_01: 20:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 20:18

And and I and I think we we got a fair idea. Everything should be fair. One time we we had this friend's and she found this perfect present for one of her kids at a at a discount store. And it was like what the kid had wanted for the longest time, and it was super cheap. And so she went around that whole store for like an hour trying to find three more presents because she had four daughters. And when she couldn't find that present enough for the others, she put it back. And Heather was like, Well, because they were they're both young moms at that time. She goes, Well, why wouldn't you buy it? That's what she wants. She goes, Well, if I brought that home, there'd be fighting, it wouldn't be fair. And and we thought, well, that'd be a great lesson for the girls to learn, you know, some you rejoice with those that rejoice, you know, and be that get blessed. But but we have this wired in us, sometimes as parents, and then definitely we we think, well, then that's how God should be, God should be fair. And we can get really offended at God. Because do you realize that brother in the story, he spent half of the stuff, and now when he comes back, the the older brother's got to split now his stuff that was gonna be his with this guy, who this freeloader who spent it all, you know? That's not fair. You know, he should get some consequence for behaving. I've been behaving good the whole time. Where's my reward? What's you know, and and God's trying to say, no, there is a reward, there's plenty. Come in, but our offense keeps us. That's the question, and that's really the lesson of the story for those of you that find yourself, and I think that in our lifetime we're gonna find ourselves many times in both of those ditches.

SPEAKER_01: 21:50

Yes. Sometimes we're the prodigal, sometimes we're the older brother.

SPEAKER_00: 21:53

Right?

SPEAKER_01: 21:54

Sometimes we're the fair sea, and sometimes we're the text coming.

SPEAKER_00: 22:04

When you judge yourself as doing so good. Right? I I don't I don't need grace now. I need a pat on the back. I need some rewards. Give me the lottery numbers. Do you know? I'm righteous, I'll do good with that money. You know, reward me. And so it's so easy to be offended at God.

SPEAKER_01: 22:24

And this is one of the reasons why Jesus told us I want to tell you that God is the one who gives rain to the just and the unjust. The sun shines on the just and the unjust. The abundance is for everyone. A tax collector standing afar off would not even lift his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast saying, God, be merciful to me, a sinner. The next verse is offensive. I just want you to know, like, steal yourself up for it.

SPEAKER_00: 22:55

In advance, reward.

SPEAKER_01: 22:57

I tell you, this man went to his house justified. Because let me tell you how I could let me just explain to you an error that we could all make. This man prayed and said, Be merciful to me, but he didn't say, I will make restitution. I will stop doing what I am going to do. He didn't say, I'm giving up, tax collector. He just said, be merciful to me. Sounds a lot like the man who's on the cross next to Jesus. When you go to paradise, remember me. Very often we would like to see some kind of contrition, some kind of change before we would give a mercy. And Jesus is telling us about God who gives mercy freely to all. You ask for it, you get it. Now there's another part of the story. There's a tax collector that's coming up. You know this one, Zacchaeus. You you know the story, and we all know that he was short. I don't know why, but we do. We we are aware of that. Maybe his brother told the story and he was taller. For whatever reason, we understand that he's a short guy. I maybe he would rather tell the story differently. Maybe he had like a great beard or something. I don't know. Yeah, you don't have to lead with this short. We don't have to lead with this very short man. But but Zacchaeus is also a tax collector, and he's also been listening to Jesus. He's also been a man of cruelty, he's been a man who's taken what's not his, he's been a terrible person from his own way of seeing things. And Jesus comes to his house. Jesus, who is radical in his hospitality, comes to his house. And when in the presence of Jesus, he said, Oh, I will stop doing what is wrong. I will give back everything I've stolen and give more than that. I will change. I am doing a 180. And Jesus says, This day salvation has entered your house. Like that makes sense to us. Okay, he's changed. Salvation has entered the house. Jesus is saying here in this particular parable, that man left justified. Now, this is an interesting part of the scripture. It says rather than the other, but that's not what the original language says. A lot of times we have things in our ideas, like there are reasons why we would say rather than the other. Perhaps the person was just trying to help us make uh an idea or a connotation. It doesn't say that. It says in the original text, it says, I tell you this, the man went to his house justified along with the other. They were both justified. Not because of what they know, it should startle you. They were both justified. And Jesus was saying, it's not because of what they did, it's because of the mercy of God. It's not because of all they learned, it's the mercy of God. And so I tell you this: those people left justified. They left mercy given to them. And then Jesus says, for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted. We see this. Jesus is telling us this parable and reminding of this. The first person, the Pharisee that has given us this this promise of humbling yourself. Jesus says, Everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted. Fasting is a way of humbling yourself. It's a a just since the very beginning, it's a practice of humility. It's a practice of recognizing I could, but I refrain from in solidarity with others and in way of penance. Tithing is a humbleness. It is a recognition of saying all that I have is from God. And so I return some to God so that other people can also be cared for. And so there are these practices of humility. For we see the practice of humility in the tax collector who doesn't even lift his eyes but says, Mercy, mercy, have mercy on me.

SPEAKER_00: 26:50

You know, Heather, a minute ago, you were talking about, you know, that idea of forgiving and being for forgiveness and then that whole or holding on to it or holding on holding the grudge or holding. And uh, you know, when it comes to our forgiveness, we want that, you know, we we want it right away. And and uh, but I wonder if you realize maybe how much in our families of origin we we have been trained to like wait for the penance or wait for to distract some kind of blood or pound of flesh, some something that's owed, you know? And so when you see this, it's startling that God isn't waiting for the pound of flesh from the one that they both leave justified, that just it doesn't compute. And and I tell you that that uh uh how how you might think to yourself, well, Pastor Dennis, this doesn't apply to me, you're you're off on this one. Uh how much of the time when somebody wrongs you, do you maybe not even consciously think, well, I'm gonna stay mad at them for a little while? Or even when they say you're sorry, I don't know if I'm gonna forgive you right away, and then we wait and we and we dolve out this forgiveness as we judge. Maybe they've said sorry good enough or long enough. Does anyone know what I'm talking about? Because it's I think it's so prevalent, you know, and maybe you don't even realize you're doing it, you know? And and can we just be ready to forgive? What, you know, even when the person didn't ask for it. I just want to be graceful over that person, and I can live in that place of grace, because if I can't extend it, I won't, I won't walk in it for myself. Not that God isn't bringing it to me, but you understand that that it's you you've just trained yourself that that's not how it works. And so when you train yourself that's not how it works, you don't live in it. But if you could train yourself to just stop holding, you know, I I remember being a little kid, and my brother would tease me for a little while, then he'd say he was sorry. I'm still mad at you. And he'd go, come on. And he'd be poking, you know, stay mad. And he'd poke, and pretty soon, I'd laughed. You know, did you ever do that when you were a kid? And you're like, you tried so hard to be mad. And then we take that into adult life, and maybe we don't do that, but we'd still do the thing, I don't know if I'm gonna forgive you for that. I don't know, I think that's crossed the line, and I'm just and I've decided grace can't go to you. And so then I begin to practice the idea grace is limited, and so we wealth we dole it out in very small portions, and so it comes back to us as we've measured it out. What? That's good preaching. What if we decided? I'll be I'll say it if they don't. That's good preaching. Good job, Pastor D.

SPEAKER_01: 29:55

It sounds a lot like it sounds a lot like the prayer that Jesus taught us to pray. Yes, it does. Forgive us our sins as we have been forgiven. Forgive those who sin against us. Just forgive them. It doesn't mean to stay in harm's way. It doesn't mean to stay in an abusive relationship. In fact, you should leave if you're in an abusive relationship. But you can forgive. You absolutely can forgive. You can declare that what has happened to you is not your identity. That's what forgiveness is. The way you have wronged me, that is not who I am. Who I am is beloved. Who I am is a child of God. Who I am is one with you, which is terribly hard to say when that person has wronged you.

SPEAKER_00: 30:44

Can we go ahead and talk about this? Because Heather and I have been doing this thing for a couple weeks now, and it has been life-changing. Because do you know how you can think back at some trauma and some abuses that you've had, and when you share them with somebody else, the same emotion comes back to you, and they just, and whether you like it or not, it's shaped your identity for good, but mostly for bad. You know? But yet we've had millions of experiences. Even today, you've had thousands and thousands of experiences in the seconds and moments that the states have. But none of those have shaped you. You've allowed certain ones to shape you by your choice of not releasing it. That's better preaching your amen.

SPEAKER_01: 31:35

They're thinking about it. Heather and I've been saying this.

SPEAKER_00: 31:38

Heather's been saying this that when we're driving down the road, we've driven past a million white lines.

SPEAKER_01: 31:46

And you have two.

SPEAKER_00: 31:48

But not one of those I'm hanging on to. Not one of those moments am I allowing to define me. And allowing those moments, because there's been so many moments in your life, you already know how to do this. They don't define me. They don't affect me. They're white lines on the road. I drove past them. I give them no power. I give them no cause. I refuse to let them make me angry because they control me and tell me where I can and cannot drive. I refuse to let them fence me in and hold me back. They're white lines and I just don't care. I release it. What if I could live in that place? Now, am I saying this is easy? Because I have trauma, I have hurts, I have pain in my life, but I recognize that's where grace stops. Where I refuse to let it go and I hang on to it. But but God has said that I can give it to God. I can release it. I can be healed of the yeah, but if I release that person and I forgive them, they go scot-free. No, I'm the older brother. I want justice for this. But yet I want complete and total grace for myself. Now I'm not saying that when you release those people that have harmed you, all of a sudden God releases them. I'm sure there's there's some reckoning, there's all that stuff, you know, they still have their deal stuff to deal with. But I am convinced that you hanging on to it doesn't help you and doesn't hurt them. I'm convinced that if I could look, and and it's so, and if you say to yourself, well, I don't know what what you're talking about, I don't know where. Give yourself a couple minutes, a couple days, and all of a sudden you're gonna start getting heated about something, and you're gonna remember something, it's gonna be a sick pit in your stomach. And then you're gonna hear the chubby guy's words. Oh, there it is. I won't let it be a white line, I let it be a stumbling block. I'm tripping over that painted line on the road. It's not bigger than you, it's not defining you. God has said who you are. You're loved, you're redeemed, you're the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus. You're whole, you're lacking nothing. Yabat.

SPEAKER_01: 34:18

And if the parable is doing its job, it should be making you uncomfortable. Mercy for everyone? Yes. Sometimes letting go or forgiving someone is very different than having to deal with the pain of what happened to you. There is a difference between forgiveness and dealing with the aftermath of somebody else's choices. Beloved, get a good therapist. Seriously. Bring the Holy Spirit into it, but get someone that you can work through some things with. Jesus and therapists are often very good combinations.

unknown: 34:53

Amen.

SPEAKER_01: 34:53

The invitation is into forgiveness, not into denial of the pain. It's into alignment with the eternal, alignment of things that are true, alignment of things that have power. Beloved love is the power that changes everything that changes us. And Jesus is telling us here: listen, this is who God is, merciful, merciful beyond measure, merciful beyond what we would think that person should get. And this is the hope for all of us. Everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted. Jesus is saying to us, a practice in humility is recognizing that we are to be people of mercy, that we are to do works of mercy, that we are to be people who allow in our minds mercy and mercy for ourselves. Because sometimes the people that we are hardest against are our own self. I knew better, I should have. And to be able to receive the kind of mercy that Jesus is telling us is available, you are justified. How? Because, beloved, it's all Jesus' work anyway. The reason any of us get any good thing is because God has already given it to us. He loves us. We are loved by God. The whole world is loved by God. I remind you, this is not my idea. John chapter 3, verse 16. Perhaps you've heard it. For God so loved the world, the whole thing, including the cosmos, including the nature, including the animals. My beloved friend Caroline was a little late this morning. She sent a text. I'm on my way. But there was a dog. Okay. We all know how that story goes, right? I had a plan, and then there was a dog. A dog who needed me. A dog, why did he need Caroline? Because she was aware. Jesus shows up to us in all kinds of ways. In the people that we do not see him in. Jesus in distressing disguise. So she stopped and got it water and took care of it. Sometimes that is what we are called to do in order to be the people that God has us to be. Sometimes we take care of things that we had no plan to take care of. We hear someone else's pain, and now all of a sudden we are making needs met. We see someone that has need, and now we are looking around going, where is the mercy here? How can I be a part of it? But Jesus is asking us to change our minds about God, who God is, and who God will be merciful to.

SPEAKER_00: 37:44

You know, this whole thing about changing your mind is allowing God to do something. I think the greatest thing, uh, and I'm on this, I've been on this for a while. I think the greatest thing about being a human being is our ability to change our minds. You know, to really just like change your nature, you know what I mean? From this is how we used to be, this is my family of origin, but God is doing something in my life, you know, and I'm allowing it. And so we've talked about some serious things like some trauma uh uh life-defining things, and then I'm suggesting that you release those, you know, and and so, you know, I I heard Carol uh cry out, just Jesus, you know. And absolutely in our relationship, and Heather's being very practical saying sometimes there's things where you might need to talk to somebody, you know, and so I'm not belittling it, you know, and it's not belittling it to say just let Jesus fix it. Because, you know, my practice lately has really been when I need to talk to somebody, I do. But there's times when when when those trauma memories and stuff come, instead of me going through it and and walking down that place of anger, I'm saying, I'm saying, Jesus, you know, Spirit of God, help me let this pass through me. Because it the thought comes and then it sticks, and then it, and then I begin to dwell and think about and or be or or let myself feel those swing emotions. And so I'm approaching that in my own quiet time, because I don't have to book a therapy appointment every time, that that God has equipped me with the Holy Spirit. But like I say, sometimes you might be stuck, and something might be so traumatic and so so abusive. You need you need help with that. But I but I do tell you that God is the way. Jesus is the answer, and so so either you're gonna find a godly therapist who's gonna help you connect those dots with Christ, and you're gonna walk in that freedom. But I also remind you that that sometimes you don't have to figure it out. Because I I don't know, I just know how I've been dealing with it, and it's and that and because of that, it's not changing. And so I'll just I'll just simply say with the Holy Spirit, help, help this pass through me. And without my mind trying to race through and my ego trying to figure or build new walls or barriers or all this, I just simply let the Holy Spirit uh, and I guess for me it's really a place of surrendering to Spirit going, I know you're at work, giving opportunity. And I find that there's an ease as that begins to pass.

SPEAKER_01: 40:18

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